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Hosted by Masi Willis and Shannon Scott, Lead Like You Mean It is a leadership podcast for those who want more than inspiration—they want impact. We’ll help you lead from the inside out, with tools that stick and some truth that stretches you.
Everything Made Beautiful (00:02.178)
Well, we are back. We are, we are. Welcome back to the Lead Like You Mean It podcast where we are making an assumption that it is fully fall in Georgia and Tennessee. We don't know though, because as of this recording, it is August in the Cayman Islands. Yes. So as a fun little fact, before we get started, tell the audience what has been your favorite thing about being away.
this week? Focused writing time. I have a problem where I prioritize everyone else in my life over myself, but I had a writing project I wanted to get over the line and yesterday that is all I did all day and got so much further down the road on it. Yes. So that has been my favorite productive part. My favorite personal part is
just sitting out on the porch watching people frolic in the water and talking about leadership and life and love and all the sorts of things that we talk about. Okay, let's just be real though. We have sat out on that porch and have made up so many stories about people down there. 100 % Do any of you people do that? Everyone does it. I love it. And let me just say, we totally met these people in the pool the very first night we got here.
And we summed up and said, that is the mother of the son and then the daughter in That's mother in law. huh. And we nailed it. We got you know what I said? I said, that is an SEC football guy. Yes. I don't know if it's Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia, Florida, Tennessee. I don't know who it is, but that is a, that is an SEC football guy who lives in the South. He's a Florida Gator.
Yes, they live in Jacksonville. She went to Flagler. He actually was in school in Augusta, played baseball. Some people are like, I know them. Don't say their names. I know their names. Of course I got all this is this is. Yeah, this is a good lead in. I certainly can find out a lot of information about people pretty quickly. So it has been a fun week. We do have great fun together.
Everything Made Beautiful (02:27.212)
And I agree with you. We made this choice for it to be fun, but focused and friendship and football. So we have had a really, really good week. So if you don't take time to like pause and be intentional, change your space. Like if you can go off somewhere and find another space and still be productive. That's what it takes for me. I do love my home. I'm a nester. create a very specific environment and peaceful atmosphere there.
but sometimes it takes getting to a completely separate space to get my brain to go to some of the places I need it to go. Did you purposely alliterate all those F's that you said? You said it is focus, fun.
Friendship and football and I'm adding and five voices I did not purposefully do that. But once I realized I was to the third F I was like, well, we can't stop now. We can't stop now. So it worked perfectly because we are back with five voices. We are talking about the fourth of five voices and I'll say what I've said every week. If you've not listened to the
episodes seven, eight, nine, and 10 in this series, then you want to do that before you are looking at this episode. But we are going to start the way that we've started our others with the six assumptions we want to make sure are in place as we're listening. We have expounded on these in the other episode, so I'm just going to run through them really quick, and then we're going to get to today's voice. So the first is that our voice is made up of
all five of the voices so that we have one that rises to the top and one that's a really clear second. We're made up of all five voices and are able to access them the more that we learn and grow and develop. Number two, some voices are more natural to us than others. That's why we call them foundational voices. You will have some that are like obviously that.
Everything Made Beautiful (04:24.93)
just remember that all five are in play. Maturity allows us to value the contribution each voice brings to the table. So there's no better voice, worse voice, good voice, bad voice. All five voices are necessary at the table and all have a really specific and vital contribution. Nature, nurture, and choice have all played a part in what our voice order is. So the way that we were designed
the way that we were raised and the choices that we've made. Don't assume that you know what somebody else's foundational voice is. You may not. That just may be the way that you have seen them in the environments you've been in with them that has been required of them because of what that environment required. Don't assume you know somebody's foundational voice. We'll talk a little bit more about that today because it has played a lot into Macy's journey, particularly with Five Voices. But then lastly,
Don't assume you know what the words of each voice mean. So don't assume that you know what creative means, because it doesn't mean, the graphic designer. Creative is very specific as it relates to the five voices, so don't make assumptions about what the words mean. All right. We are at our fourth voice, which is Macy's first voice, and that is the connector. Talk to us, connector.
Yes, so the Connector, we are champions of relational networks. Unlike the nurturer who's all about the oil, the relational oil, we are relational networks. We have this internal collaboration desire and we really are effective communicators.
So we just so many contacts in your phone. I do. That's one thing that I do sometimes when I'm in a live workshop is tell everybody pull their phone out. How many contacts? I'm well over 4,000 in mine. I had one guy who was the director of fellowship of Christian athletes for a local college and he had like 10,000. I was like, how does your phone even function? But yes, we do.
Everything Made Beautiful (06:40.908)
We do have lots of contacts and yeah, it's why I can really connect with anybody in a swimming pool and find out information about them. yeah, so that's the overview of the connector and I'll you share our strengths because that seems odd. Yeah, totally. Well, you shared mine, so I'll share yours. So as you can tell, if you have listened to Maisie for any length of time, connectors are persuasive.
and inspirational communicators. Macy can make me believe in something that I was flatly against just in the way that she talks about it. And I wouldn't even say in the way that she sells it. It's the inspirational and persuasive way that connectors communicate that makes you lean in. And it's why that network of people gets so vast because they have a lot of, we call it woo.
There's a lot that's able to draw you in. They are really effective at rallying people to causes and things, but here's the key, that they believe in. Connectors aren't just gonna rally you for the sake of rallying you. Connectors are gonna rally you around things and causes that they believe in. But in a group where there needs to be a rallying cry, you can count on connectors to do that. Connectors are incredibly resourceful.
whatever we need, I have it or I can get it or I know somebody who has it and we can get it done. That is how Macy approaches everything. We have never met a problem we cannot solve. Never. I just had a flashback of a U-Haul going to New Orleans. my goodness. Yeah. It's really good to travel with us because I'm a nurture guardian connector and Macy is a connector creative and we are able to get anything.
figured out, done, scheduled, ordered. There's not a lot that we stand around wringing our hands about. Connectors, as we said with the phone illustration, but in truth, have the ability and the capacity to maintain a really large swath of relationships.
Everything Made Beautiful (08:55.552)
So when I joked about Macy having the contacts in her phone, it isn't just that there's a bunch of names in her phone, though I will be clear sometimes when I'm searching for somebody, people's names will come up in my phone. I'm like, I haven't talked to that person in a decade. Macy probably has. She knows everybody. She knows why they're in there. She remembers what the situation was. And she could call them and still have some kind of relational equity with them. That is a strength of connectors. They know how to connect with people.
and they know how to connect with their aspirations. So those are high strengths of the connector. You feel very seen and you feel very known when you're in the presence of a connector. Yeah, but we do have some challenges. Because our little black book, Our Currency as People, we need appreciation and credit for making key connections. You know, are you aware of what I've done?
because it's currency to us, we don't just give it away freely. And sometimes I can get like a little festered, a little triggered when people are like, hey, I just want to know, can you connect me with so-and-so to do such-and-such? So you have to be really careful because we do need the appreciation. It's not like glory, like we don't need the reward or the award. It's more of just know I'm the one that connected you to that person.
And we can be people pleasing, lean towards people pleasing tendencies, which mean we often struggle to bring really a direct challenge or really being able to look at it being effective.
we can sometimes hint around things and feel like people don't understand. don't you get that? Yeah, like, it sure would be nice if that budget was there by Friday when in actuality I wanted it Thursday so that I could review it before I presented it and I'm hoping they'll get that. Right. Because we're people pleasing and like Shannon said, I struggle with...
Everything Made Beautiful (10:56.762)
asking for in the last episode, sometimes guardian work, then I'm not very clear with challenge. And then we often struggle to hear or engage fully with critical feedback. I think that's a really important way that that sentence is phrased. Struggling to hear is one thing, engaging fully is one thing. And that can be hard for a connector because it feels personal. Yeah, yeah, it does. It does really feel personal. And I've worked
incredibly hard at even as simple as the way I read friends text messages or the way I look at an email that comes back to me. I will automatically take it personally. Now on the other side of me, the people that really know me well should know to form their text messages differently, right? It's both ways. It's not one way or the other. But when you know that about us, we struggle with that critical feedback.
you will frame your feedback in a way that is helpful to bring the best out of a connector. And we have to know, do not take things personally. That's the first question I ask most often is, are you acting out of a...
personal conviction that you feel has been attacked, are you assuming the best out of them? So yeah, those are kind of our strengths and our weaknesses. And as friends of a connector, it's our, you know, we talk about know yourself. So it's important that Macy knows she's a connector and that she understands that those are her challenge areas.
But it's just as important if we're going to lead ourselves and lead other people that we understand each other. So in the same way she's familiar with my strengths and weaknesses or strengths and challenges, I am with hers. And so I'm not going to come at her with any kind of critical feedback because she will take it personally. Instead, I'm going to process all of that through the fact that I don't speak first.
Everything Made Beautiful (12:51.244)
and I'm gonna go through all of the things in my brain that I know to be true about Macy. And at the end of the road, I'm likely gonna get to where there's not a need for me to give her any critical feedback because she's self-aware. So those are just, we just always wanna be framing that the goal is that we're becoming better versions of ourselves. And as such, we are learning about the people in our sphere of influence.
so that we can be participating in them being better versions of themselves. And so that's why relational equity matters and knowing not just your voice, but the voices of the people in your sphere. Well, and you, you it's not doing to others as you know, you'd want done to yourself. It's doing to others as they would want done. And so we can't use it as an excuse. I cannot stand when people go, well, I'm just a, yeah, or you'll just have to deal with it cause I'm a
Creative I don't know how to speak. No, I can't say well you'll have to deal with I take everything personal No, I have to know that I take things personal and choose to Do as they would want done to them. You would never want me to take anything personal You've never given me any reason to believe that and so when we look at the connector we represent 11 % of the population not quite as rare as the creative and you'll see as the pioneer neither them either
Here's an interesting thing about my voice order. I am a connector creative pioneer. We define connector creatives with two voices, the connector creative nurturer and the connector creative pioneer. My fourth voice nurturer, my fifth voice guardian. So all three of my first voices are future oriented. And the ones that I struggle the most with are present oriented. So I'm always assuming and filling in the future.
and working my way back. And so with that 11%, we have to remember that we're rare in that place. We don't separate work and just fun life. We go to the hotel bar and we're sitting there thinking we're having fun when I'm actually networking and getting business cards and thinking through how could I connect them to something I'm trying to solve for. And that creative lens makes me that true problem solver.
Everything Made Beautiful (15:12.364)
And with the connector, we are the fourth decibel point. So we are one of the loudest, not quite the loudest, but we actually talk so much. And so we will always be most likely the first to speak, as well as the pioneer. And so we have to be really careful not to shut the other 82 % down, because there's only 18 % left. And I just told you I'm 11. So if you're a mathematician out there, you should be able to figure out what our pioneers are going to be.
But we have to be really careful and I have to draw my voice back and say, Hey, invite the nurture, invite the creative, invite the guardian to speak first because we are 11 % and we do speak quite often. connector we've said champion of relational networks, also champions of internal collaboration. Connectors don't want to be siloed off by themselves doing things solo.
The creative might like that, the nurturer might like that, the connector is not gonna wanna be that person. And we've said that they're very effective communicators, inspirationally as well. We've said what to watch out for. Connectors have a tendency to interpret challenge of their ideas or themselves as personal first. You just heard Macy talk about, it's not, don't take things personally.
it's, okay, I'm gonna take that personally, but before I speak, which I have a tendency to do first, I'm gonna pause, I'm gonna wait, I'm gonna process through, if it's me, what I know about Shannon, what I know about her heart, the way I've historically been treated by her, I'm gonna wait and try to dial back the personal before I respond. Now, immature connectors, you will find get offended easily and speak out of offense easily.
But Macy is a mature connector, so she does not experience that. it's well, sometimes. Well, she does not often experience that. But she is very transparent with earlier in your life and earlier in your work. That would be taking things personally. But then also speaking when you were offended would definitely have been higher up in the mix. I would say. That's probably the most significant transformation is.
Everything Made Beautiful (17:31.007)
is your ability to say, to self lead in high pressure, because we found ourselves in a lot of high pressure, high intensity, high, like we got to move fast and this is, and there's a lot on the line situations, which is a ripe atmosphere for being offended and speaking without thinking. And I have just seen that really be transformational.
It helps us to know what we're champions of too because I've been able to look back over, I think about one of my last jobs I had in a firm, I was so siloed. But it appeared to everyone on the outside that I wasn't. And it's like, you're part of a team of 20. you're traveling to all these different client locations where there's all tons of people. But I was on one client in my little office on certain days.
maybe one or two people with me while collaboration, because I work with such a brilliant group of leaders and a firm, there was collaboration on multiple different clients happening and I felt so siloed. And I could verbalize that, but really now understanding that because I'm such a champion of that, it was debilitating to me. It sucked the life out of me. And that's where we have turnover or burnout.
is when we understand what people champion and we can put them in those positions and recognize that. This is where understanding the voices, it's not just the blueprint under our arm, you know, it's getting all the building material and it's thinking about in our organizations, teams and families, are we putting everyone in the place to really soar? The one thing that you can empower me with or any connector really is to give our time to share our ideas and passions.
and just appreciate before you critique. Sometimes we'll share too long and I've given people permission. I had a guy I used to work with that was a creative. I was like, tell me when I need a bullet point and he did a great job. Or I'd say, tell me when I'm exaggerating because we're such a communicator and I would trigger him because I would say, everybody's thinking. It's like, are you sure it's everyone? So it's really important. The one last trait thing that I would say about connectors and I want to mention about creatives,
Everything Made Beautiful (19:50.603)
is in the makeup of our voices, all connectors are extroverted. And we can do this on a different subject around Myers-Briggs and predictive leadership behaviors, but most people think extroverts all about people and no people, it's introverts. That's not true. That is not even definitive. It's not the definition. It drives me crazy when people say that, but extroversion is you draw energy from the external of your brain and body. So you go.
outside of yourself, whether it's walking on a road or going to the grocery store or being in the public spaces, or I can just walk out on my back porch. Introverts go internally inside their mind, inside their space. They create their haven, their refuge, their space to be. And when we respect that from each other, we understand all connectors are extroverts and all creatives are introverts.
And so the nurture, the guardian, and the pioneer can be either or, but that is a unique trait to those two voices that when you find that, or you think you've met a connector, but they're very introverted, you probably have not. You might have met a nurture connector or a nurture guardian in that way. It's good.
All right, that's our fourth voice and next week we will bring up the rear but by no means the quietest or any of that. We're going to talk about our power pioneers. Yes. And we need them so badly just like we need all the voices. So make sure you don't miss that so that you've got your full scope.
As always, if you're interested in knowing what your voice order is, there's a free assessment in the show notes, but we encourage you to take a next step after that assessment, reach out to Macy and have somebody help you with how do you build a working knowledge of this content that helps you become the best version of yourself. In the meantime, until we see you next week, be sure that in your city, your sector, your sphere of influence, you go out there and you.
Everything Made Beautiful (21:59.22)
Lead like you mean it. Have We'll see you next time.