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You Can Mentor is a network that equips and encourages mentors and mentoring leaders through resources and relationships to love God, love others, and make disciples in their own community.
We want to hear from you! Send any mentoring questions to hello@youcanmentor.com, and we'll answer them on our podcast. We want to help you become the best possible mentor you can be. Also, if you are a mentoring organization, church, or non-profit, connect with us to join our mentoring network or to be spotlighted on our show.
Please find out more at www.youcanmentor.com or find us on social media. You will find more resources on our website to help equip and encourage mentors. We have downloadable resources, cohort opportunities, and an opportunity to build relationships with other Christian mentoring leaders.
You can mentor is a network that equips and encourages mentors and mentoring organizations through resources and relationships to love God, love others and make disciples. Learn more at you can mentor.com or follow us on social media. You can mentor.
John Barnard:Hello. You can mentor listener. This is John b with your mentoring minute. Okay. I I I don't use this word very often.
John Barnard:It just sounds kind of ugly. Okay? But I hate to fly. I hate everything about flying commercial airlines. I hate getting up 72 hours before your flight so you can drive to a crowded airport with terrible parking.
John Barnard:I hate the 19 lines you wait in to do all the things. I hate taking your shoes off. I I hate putting your belt back on while you're scurrying off to go buy a $12 bottle of water in a gift shop. So you can sit on the floor next to a power outlet and charge your phone. It is all just a bunch of hurry up and wait.
John Barnard:Do you have assigned, do you guys ever have the unassigned seating on your flight, by the way? Because that is just the worst. The anxiety of standing in a in a batch of people waiting to get on the plane in groups only rivalled by the anxiety you feel when making that right turn into the plane hoping that you'll find an empty seat toward the front of the plane. And I say good luck with that. And once you do find some room in the overhead for your bag and an open seat, it's time to open that little plastic air nozzle that wheezes recirculating human passenger farts from everyone in the tin can onto the top of your head and lap as you wait for the violent takeoff.
John Barnard:Okay. Look. I admit I'm I'm getting a little worked up here, and I'm sorry if I'm alienating any of you. But before the plane even hits the friendly skies, all passengers are treated to some safety instructions where they discover that there are overhead breathing apparatus, right, and floating seat cushions, which I actually do think is kind of cool. Flight staff is always quick to remind us that adults sitting next to children should put on their own masks first and then see to their kids.
John Barnard:Right? You familiar with this. Correct? Well, I wanna present to you guys what a mentor can learn from the preflight instructions, and it begins with this. We thrive so that they can thrive.
John Barnard:Right? If the adult on a flight doesn't take care of their own breathing mask first, they're not gonna be any good to anybody. The same is true of mentors. If we are barely getting by, if we're just barely surviving, we're gonna struggle to help our mentees thrive. Right?
John Barnard:How can we kind of speak into them thriving if we are merely surviving? Next, it it needs to be said. When you're young, your your reflex is to look out for yourself. Right? When you're a parent, your knee jerk response is to see to your child.
John Barnard:The airline gives the instruction to remind us as parents that we must first take care of us so that we can then take care of them, and that's an important thing. And finally, there is just too much at stake. Right? Airlines give us emergency instructions because the stakes are so high, and it's the same with mentoring. We never want to do damage within this relationship.
John Barnard:Right? So here are 3 steps to healthy mentoring. Number 1, be proactive. Make sure that you are putting on that armor of God before leaving the house. Amen?
John Barnard:Is your faith strong? Are you growing in your faith? Do you have the margin of time and effort it takes to be a consistent and healthy mentor? If so, great. If not, I ask you, what will it take to get there?
John Barnard:Number 2, communicate. We all have some turbulence in our lives that make us less than optimal mentors. Right? You'll forget a meet up. You'll get distracted sometimes, or you'll say the wrong thing to your mentee, maybe you'll leave your phone there on the desk and and look over at it when it lights up, Making that mistake when a mentee is talking to you about something important, right?
John Barnard:Well, when these things happen be quick to apologize and see everything as a teachable moment. Ask your mentee to forgive you. Practice and model conflict resolution. Your mentee will learn a lot from how you handle things, especially when things go bad. And finally, know when to make adjustments.
John Barnard:Hit the flight attendant button. Right? Pull the plug altogether. You may need to pause meeting with your mentee so you can see to yourself. You may need to call in reinforcements.
John Barnard:There are also times when you just need to cancel meeting altogether. Each of these decisions takes prayer and counsel and wisdom. So as in all areas of life, decisions are best made in community. Proverbs 15/26/22 reminds us that plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors, they succeed. You know, I may always prefer driving cross country to flying, but when I do fly, it's good to be reminded that as mentors the health of our relationship with our mentee is 100% dependent on the health of our relationship with Christ as mentors.
John Barnard:Thank you for listening to this Mentoring Minute. And as always, we wanna remind you listener and friend, you can mentor.
Zach Garza:Thanks for tuning in to the You Can Mentor podcast. Please share this with other mentors and download our free resources on our website. You can also order Zach's book, You Can Mentor, or John's book, Mephyrsheth, on Amazon. Lastly, we'd really appreciate it if you gave us a 5 star rating on what whatever listening platform you are tuning in on. If you'd like to connect with us further, please contact us through our website because we're always looking for new guests or connections.
Zach Garza:Thank you. Remember, you can mentor.