Crazy Hockey Dads Podcast

Scott and Jamie get real about something youth hockey doesn’t teach enough: integrity. From shady rink politics to secretive skills coaches, they call out the culture of gatekeeping and why too many parents act like sharing info is giving away trade secrets.

They break down the silent rules, the cliques, and the pressure to act like you know what you’re doing, even when you don’t. Whether you're new to the game or deep in the grind, this one’s a gut check on how we treat each other in the stands, the locker room, and everywhere in between.

Less ego, more honesty. Let’s clean it up out there.

What is Crazy Hockey Dads Podcast?

A relatable and honest podcast about the highs and lows of being a youth hockey parent. Join us as we share real stories, struggles, and wins from the rink, offering insights and support for parents navigating the world of youth hockey.

Jamie:

Welcome back everybody to episode eight of the Crazy Hockey Dads podcast.

Scott:

What's up my guy? How's it going,

Jamie:

bud?

Scott:

I'm good. Yeah? Just want to say, I don't really like saying my guy.

Jamie:

Don't like saying my guy.

Scott:

No, and I was thinking about that on the car ride over here because someone said it to me and I don't my guy.

Jamie:

I kind of like my man better. My man? My man is

Scott:

But what about how are we doing? If I'm talking to you and I ask you how we are doing?

Jamie:

Yeah, that's fine. Yeah? Yeah. For some reason I gravitate toward my man. I don't know why.

Scott:

How are we doing?

Jamie:

We are doing great.

Scott:

Great, thanks.

Jamie:

So for those of you who are just joining us, my name is Jamie. This is my cohost, Scott. We are the Crazy Hockey Dads podcast. For the new people, we are here to educate about the youth hockey space.

Scott:

Yeah, I think sharing our experiences, which are vast. Look, it's a complicated landscape if you don't know or can be. We're talking about kids, sports. Parents. Parents, time, effort, energy, money.

Scott:

Struggles. It creates a lot of situations. And so part of us doing this is to talk about them and hope lend some guidance and share some stories.

Jamie:

Yeah. And I think that we've kind of carved out something here because this really is for parents, right? Who are trying to navigate this space that we are all in.

Scott:

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we have experiences or, you know, I have coaching, you have as a manager and

Jamie:

Team builder.

Scott:

Yeah. We've worn a bunch of different hats, but I think the primary goal right now is really just to help educate and share experiences with other parents

Jamie:

for sure. Old and new, by the way, I think that new parents definitely can get an idea of how to navigate the space. And I was thinking of this today. I think even older parents who have been in the game for a while sometimes maybe forget, you know, maybe the correct way to be the correct thing to do the correct thing to say to your kid. I think sometimes even the seasoned hockey parent may even benefit from this.

Scott:

Yeah. I would, because look, new things come up all the time. Things that you probably would have never thought you would be dealing with, you might be dealing with now, next year, whatever. So it's never never a dull moment.

Jamie:

Yeah. No. That's for sure. It is not a dull moment. No.

Jamie:

So just just just give you a heads up, I I happened to run into a hockey mom today. Yeah. And she was saying that before she started listening to, like, power text podcast, think tanks podcast. And I told her, I go, listen, there's another really good one you need to listen to. It's called crazy hockey dads.

Jamie:

I go, if you wanna know about the youth hockey space, I go, you I go, you I go try that one. Let me know what you think. Didn't didn't tell her that that that it was our podcast. Yeah. But I said, I'm like, just download.

Jamie:

I'm like, let me know what you think.

Scott:

That was this morning?

Jamie:

That was today. Yeah.

Scott:

Wait. Yeah. Did you hear from her yet?

Jamie:

No. No. She doesn't have my number though. Oh. I would have to run into her again.

Scott:

Oh, you would? Yes. Oh, that's interesting.

Jamie:

Yes. It's one of the kids that goes to Dom's school, the mom. Oh. Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie:

So You'll

Scott:

probably run into her again.

Jamie:

But she said to me, she's like, she's like, I didn't She's like, they don't tell you any of this. And I'm thinking in my head, I'm like, exactly. Nobody tells you what you should do, what you shouldn't do, where you should go to play. What, you know, like what organization, what this, what position, what nobody tells you any of that. Even the coaches, she's like, Jamie, she's like, my kid's really good in the corner.

Jamie:

She's like, but nobody told me like, he's really good in the corners. He's not good at stick handling. He's not good at shooting, but he's really tough. And he's really nasty when he's in the corners. And she's like, Nobody tells you any of this.

Jamie:

She's like, Coaches don't tell you. I was like, Okay. She's like, So that's why I started listening to Power Tech podcast, Hockey Think Tank.

Scott:

To start hearing coach's perspectives on aspects of the game that she might feel like she's missing from the current

Jamie:

What her kid was good at, what he needed to work on, like that stuff. She had to figure it out over time, but I guess my point is that I think this, I think what we're doing for the space is very appropriate and very needed.

Scott:

Obviously we're here doing it, so completely agree.

Jamie:

And we're getting tons of downloads. So clearly there's demand.

Scott:

Yeah, without a doubt.

Jamie:

Which is wild.

Scott:

I think perspective is also an important part of like when you hear some of these things, because I do listen to those other podcasts and for sure they touch upon like a lot of the things that we talk about as well.

Jamie:

Spitting chickless is not gonna touch on what we're touching They've

Scott:

got different experiences that are Yes,

Jamie:

no question.

Scott:

Are not exactly the ones we're talking about.

Jamie:

Not exactly.

Scott:

No, but I think we're in a good position to support like this space.

Jamie:

I do too.

Scott:

The youth hockey space and add to the current conversations that are currently out there, are already out there and really happy to be a part of it.

Jamie:

Yeah. I think there's a lot of need for this in our space.

Scott:

Yeah. I didn't have this when I started. No, I can't say that I did either, but

Jamie:

also I guess you kind of had me a little bit to bounce stuff

Scott:

off

Jamie:

I had

Scott:

you, right? Like other families are also going to have other families that they lean into and talk to about this But

Jamie:

if you don't, it can be challenging.

Scott:

It can be. And I think what was also very apparent was when we started playing like higher level teams and you start learning about some of the nuances about the private coaching and this coach is good for that and that one for this. You start to really getting the landscape in your community on what the elite players are doing, who they're using, when, where, why, how. And it's a little bit of a, I don't wanna say, it's not a terribly secret code, but it's not like it's presented to you when you sign up day one.

Jamie:

No, and a lot of people hide it.

Scott:

A lot of people hide it.

Jamie:

Keep their

Scott:

cards very close to themselves.

Jamie:

A lot of people do not want you to know what they're doing. No. I mean, that is a very real thing in our space. Like, I'm not gonna tell anybody who I'm skating with. No.

Jamie:

Totally. I'm not gonna tell anybody

Scott:

who I'm going to all fights with. Right.

Jamie:

Like, it's like, it's like, it's it is like a secret.

Scott:

Well, know, like on one hand, there's a practicality too, which I get because, like, ice is limited. There's not so many spots. If you go around broadcasting, like you've got a good thing going with perhaps someone that isn't as well known, then all of a sudden you might be on the outside trying to find a spot for your kid. You know what I mean? I can wrap my head around it, but I also think the way that people operate is very like, it kind of gets to the topic of what we're talking about, integrity.

Scott:

And just being honest about what you are, you are not doing. And I'm not saying people have to explain in great detail. Of course, if you want to keep stuff close to your chest.

Jamie:

But people are very secretive.

Scott:

But sometimes it comes off as like, Wow, that's a little crazy. You couldn't have told me that type of thing. But why does that even matter? And I think what we were talking about before we press record was the idea of integrity and that ultimately if you are someone that is misleading, deceiving, dishonest, etcetera, ultimately you can burn bridges. And I think that's like the thing that I would be most concerned about if I got a reputation for not being honest about certain things where honesty would be Listen,

Jamie:

and that's, we're gonna get into that later. Our topic for today is like, is integrity or honesty parents and I guess of organizations too, right? And coaches, because they can come back to bite you because the hockey world is a very small space. Super small space and things come back and you, and parents get reputations like, very quickly.

Scott:

But No doubt.

Jamie:

Very quickly.

Scott:

Yep.

Jamie:

You know, kids get reputations too, but parents get reputations very quickly in this game.

Scott:

You know, it's it's it's so funny this topic.

Jamie:

And they all talk. All organizations, they all talk

Scott:

across board. On the higher level.

Jamie:

Because they all know each other.

Scott:

Yeah. They all know each other.

Jamie:

All the coaches, all the hockey directors, all the they all know each other.

Scott:

Yes.

Jamie:

And they all talk. Stuff gets around so quickly in this game.

Scott:

No. Without a doubt, it gets around quickly. And I think

Jamie:

So quickly.

Scott:

Yeah. So I I I mean, just kind of bringing it back to current this past weekend. Yeah. Or you just mentioned you just ran to a hockey mom this morning. Talked about the podcast.

Scott:

That's awesome. Yes. Anything from the weekend, hockey wise?

Jamie:

For us?

Scott:

Good, bad or indifferent?

Jamie:

What do we do? So we were supposed to have our parody this past weekend.

Scott:

Oh, right. That would,

Jamie:

oh, yeah. So I was, so our parody, our coach

Scott:

Nick's did

Jamie:

DK'd the parody, no parody. So it was out in Iceland, which is like two hours from here.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

And he was like, you know what? I'm not going to drive two hours out with my team to play 03:30 minute games. We were the only team that did not go to the parody. You know that?

Scott:

You did mention that. I have a,

Jamie:

I'm

Scott:

not

Jamie:

sure how I feel about that. I give him credit for doing that, by way, because I don't want to go out there for three thirty minute games.

Scott:

Look, I understand that, but don't know. It's like a league Your signal There's like it might signal to some that we're better than all

Jamie:

of them. Listen. Maybe.

Scott:

We don't need to go. Maybe. Listen. That might be a signal?

Jamie:

Listen. If we clean house Ten hundred hours. This year, then maybe. You know? Listen.

Jamie:

I'm not sure. Right. I I honestly don't know what it says. Listen, most, I'm assuming most teams probably had no idea we weren't even there.

Scott:

That's my guess. But either way, you know, it's an interesting decision to make. And I understand logistically that it's just terribly inconvenient and it's meaningless for at least your team. Maybe the league will have a takeaway or two by watching you guys play, but

Jamie:

I don't know how meaningless it was for our team. I'm not sure. I honestly don't know. I don't know. We're in a new league, you know, because we were bought by Blackbear.

Jamie:

So it's a new league. It's a new everything. So I don't know.

Scott:

So when we went to ours, it wasn't as far away. It was far away.

Jamie:

You guys were like an hour away.

Scott:

It was a little annoying, but they did a good job space and the games out. Not too far apart, so you weren't there like all day. But what was clear to me was that our team was not mopping the floor with anyone nor were they getting

Jamie:

nice. Don't worry folks, we're figuring this out as we go.

Scott:

You know what's so funny?

Jamie:

I promise you the production value as we go along here, we're only in episode eight, I promise you it will get much better as we go along.

Scott:

Dude, and it's like, you know, it's like the person that just called

Jamie:

So much to think about.

Scott:

The person that's just called, because it's like the right person to like annoy me and do that.

Jamie:

And just so you folks know, which you and I have never talked about, by the way.

Scott:

What?

Jamie:

We do not edit this at all. No. This is all of our raw audio. Whatever we say gets published. We do not edit this literally at all.

Jamie:

Right? No. I don't even think we know how to edit.

Scott:

Well,

Jamie:

listen, we could fit we know, but we have never done it. No. Because we so all of this whatever we say goes live.

Scott:

That is true.

Jamie:

It's being recorded. Gus, sorry, you were saying?

Scott:

No, the parody of it. Oh yeah, so it was just clear that the teams that we played, we was like, okay, you know, they'll be competitive to some extent. I think of the games we played, we tied one and won the other two. We were the better team in all three games, but at least we didn't like show up there and like, be like, Oh my God, I can't, like, we're gonna get smoked. Right.

Scott:

And we also didn't show up and be like, Oh my God, this is gonna be a walk in the park either.

Jamie:

Okay, listen.

Scott:

But again, that was thirty minutes per thirty minute running clock against three different teams.

Jamie:

And

Scott:

that's only, I don't even know how they selected teams we played against. They could have been the best.

Jamie:

Assuming it was random. I'm guessing it was random, you know, I don't know either. It's gonna be, yeah, I don't know. I'll let you know how, as the season goes on when we start playing, like how it goes, But I have something I want to go into. So we're going to talk about integrity and stuff like that.

Jamie:

But I'm curious to hear as you mentioned the weekend and, know, so we, we kind of didn't go to our parody. So we went to the city instead and stayed in a hotel in Manhattan just with the family, just kind of messed around. I was telling you, just to hang out, you know, just the four of us because very rarely do we not have any ice hockey in it. Yeah.

Scott:

Yeah. So it

Jamie:

was kind of nice not having anything and just going to the city and hanging out for a

Scott:

night.

Jamie:

Yep. So that was great as a family. But so tonight so after we're done with this, I'm going to the rink for a parent meeting.

Scott:

Yeah. You mentioned.

Jamie:

So one of the topics of that parent meeting is going to be, because I already spoke to the team manager and the coach. Yeah. One of those topics are going to be so now we're in this AHF, right? So we have three showcases that they pay for a parody event and three showcases.

Scott:

Who pays the Your tuition.

Jamie:

If you want to go to a tournament, I'm 99% sure the parents have to pony up for the tournaments. There are no tournaments included in your tuition.

Scott:

So what's ridiculous about that, and correct me if I'm

Jamie:

It is ridiculous. I agree with that.

Scott:

So the showcases are basically

Jamie:

They're league games.

Scott:

League games that are being played. Correct. Like a la tournament In a third party spot. Right.

Jamie:

Yes. So say you're in Albany or you're in your and everybody goes to Albany to play. You're in Pittsburgh. Everybody goes to Pittsburgh to play. But they're league games.

Scott:

Right. So there's no chance of winning a trophy. No chance of like any type of

Jamie:

playoff. So they're they're considering that as a tournament in air quotes, which is horseshit.

Scott:

Yeah. That's It's horseshit. Especially since you don't choose where you go.

Jamie:

Of course not. You're gonna be in the middle of nowhere. Right. You're not gonna be anywhere fun.

Scott:

For all you know, you could be your home rank. If it's a if it's a league event, it

Jamie:

could be at your home rank. 1%. How much does that suck?

Scott:

I wonder if they charge them. I don't know. Dude.

Jamie:

Listen, it's a home ice slot. It would be a home ice slot, so yeah. Continue

Scott:

tuition. Answer this.

Jamie:

You get a certain amount of games no matter where they are.

Scott:

But that's just because it's the AHF or that league. For other teams in the building that are playing in different leagues that are either in, I'm assuming maybe the now the

Jamie:

THF the THF. It's all the same But

Scott:

the THF doesn't have, at least ours last year, we didn't have mandatory showcases that were just torn, a lead So

Jamie:

I'm pretty sure you do.

Scott:

From THF?

Jamie:

Listen, we had them. We had mandatory things we had to do when we were in the THF.

Scott:

And we didn't have that last

Jamie:

year. Yeah. And if you're out of the top 25, you have to play like a full schedule.

Scott:

Here's If you're in

Jamie:

the top 25 or in the top 15, it gets watered down. So our first year we finished fifteenth. We had to play like 12 games in the THF.

Scott:

The thing I don't like about this is this should have been decided before tuition goes out if you ask me. Like when you're paying these big bills, just who wants yet another charge? It always happens because there's like after you have your tuition, there's like Always. Oh, I don't know what it is. Like the tournament, whatever the teams raise money for.

Scott:

And there's always an and then, and then then,

Jamie:

and then

Scott:

then. And it's like, when does this shit stop?

Jamie:

That's going, that is what you just said is exactly going to be the topic tonight.

Scott:

It's fucking annoying.

Jamie:

Because the manager's gonna say, here we are in our three events are on our schedule already. One's like late August, one's like October. And I want to say one's like January.

Scott:

Okay.

Jamie:

Okay. We were talking and, you know, the manager was talking me. He's like, Jamie, we want to do two tournaments. I'm like, great. Pick two cool places to go.

Jamie:

And I'm like, pick two, we've talked about this before. I'm like, pick two really cool places that we've, that you guys have never been. I've been everywhere, but from where you guys have never been.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

Right. And let's go someplace fun around a major city and let's do something for the kids. Cause that's what it's all about. It's all about the kids anyway. Right.

Jamie:

The showcase is not fun for them. They go stay in a hotel, but showcases suck. These kids want to try to win a tournament, win like a trophy or a medal or something. Right. So I'm like, two tournaments.

Jamie:

And he's like, listen, we're going to have to bring it up at the parent meeting that it's going to cost like $150 per family

Scott:

to do another tournament.

Jamie:

So it's going to cost $300 per family. And I said to him-

Scott:

But it's more than that though. Well, would that's the entry fee, but then you have to factor on the travel and all the other Yeah.

Jamie:

We're not going to fly to a place. So, so understand that. It's- You're a thousand bucks to $1,500 for the most part for a hockey weekend.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

Right? Ish. So the question tonight is going to be, because there will be a couple parents because there always is that do not want to pony up the money.

Scott:

And that's a problem?

Jamie:

Well, listen, for those parents, it's going to be.

Scott:

But with this topic in particular, with the tournaments, this is why it wouldn't be a conversation if it was already baked into tuition and they're already paying for it. And on the calendar, there was two more weekends that were away.

Jamie:

No question. But it's not.

Scott:

But it's not. Right. And that's the expense is optional.

Jamie:

And that's where the problem lies. So I'm telling you, there will be one or two families or three that will have a problem

Scott:

with it.

Jamie:

Yeah. Cause there always is. So what I said to him, I said, listen, and you tell me how you think about this. I think the majority should rule because if 18 families want to go and two don't,

Scott:

Yep. Don't

Jamie:

come. You don't have to come. It's optional. You don't have come.

Scott:

Is it truly, so you're saying like it's truly optional? Listen, if you don't want to come, you don't

Jamie:

have come. Don't have to pay for it. You don't have to come. Like, you know, listen, you, you may get may coming to the doghouse with the coach, but that's a decision you're gonna have to live with.

Scott:

But then also your your kid's gonna look at you and be like, mom, dad, why aren't I going to that tournament? Listen. Like, it's putting the parents in, like, a no win situation.

Jamie:

Listen. If

Scott:

if they truly, you know, like can't do it either from a scheduling perspective, I don't know, Aunt Jane's wedding or

Jamie:

Right. And listen, there's no good answer to this stuff. There's no. There could be because I said to him, I said, listen, I said, you know, either you make it, if a parent does not want to go and they really just, they're mad because they don't want to pay the extra money because it's not built into tuition, then listen, they don't have to come. Right.

Jamie:

Right. So that's number one. I don't think that one or two families should ruin it for the rest is what I'm is what I'm saying.

Scott:

I I would agree with that.

Jamie:

Right. So what listen, what we did what we did with with the with our Rockets team is we did like a Super Bowl pool. And either you paid the $150 right up front or you went and you sold like 10 Super Bowl boxes.

Scott:

Well, that was like the what I was gonna say is like,

Jamie:

you know,

Scott:

if you don't wanna sell Super Bowl boxes, just give $150 fundraisers.

Jamie:

So that's an option. Right? But some people don't wanna do that, So I guess my and listen. And I'm going to say this at the parent meeting tonight. If somebody is really hard up for money like last year, we had a single mom with two hockey players on our I didn't know how hard up she was for money until after the season.

Jamie:

Okay? And unfortunately, her her kid's not on the team anymore, and I like I like her a lot.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

If it's somebody like that, and I'm gonna say tonight, if it's a a real problem with money, let us know, and a bunch of us will

Scott:

Chip in.

Jamie:

Put her on scholarship. Right. Right? So that that I have no problem doing that. It's the parent who doesn't wanna do it just because and bitches and moans about it.

Jamie:

That I have a problem.

Scott:

Yeah. It's you know, I I listen. I I'm I'm not disagreeing with you. I I I understand because it kind of sucks the air out of a room having a parent or a family that categorizing this family as habitual complainers where there's always something wrong.

Jamie:

There's always a habitual problem. No question.

Scott:

There's like a high maintenance, sucks the energy out

Jamie:

of it. The coach,

Scott:

the other parents about complaining that, yeah.

Jamie:

And they won't say anything tonight at the meeting, they will say, they will text the manager behind the scenes or email being like, This is a problem for

Scott:

Right. But okay. All right, so let's respect the privacy for a second and let's just say like, Look, there's also pride involved. I mean, it's also like you're not talking about a bunch of peers that you're necessarily you're just meeting people the first time and you're gonna be like, Hey, and by the way, can you please like cover my costs? That's not an easy thing for people to admit, even if amongst people that they feel super comfortable with.

Jamie:

Listen, I don't know how it's gonna go.

Scott:

No, I know. I'm interested to hear.

Jamie:

I am too. Because last year there were a couple parents that were complaining that we were doing because we did it last year. We put up $150 for, I want to say it was Buffalo and then 150 for Lake Placid per family. And these parents-

Scott:

There was blowback.

Jamie:

Complained. Right? And two of them are not here anymore, but then we have new parents, so you never know what's gonna happen there.

Scott:

But them not being there on the team has nothing to do with the No, no, no.

Jamie:

The coach just picked kids that he liked better. Yeah. Gotcha. Yeah. No, no.

Jamie:

One of the kids actually didn't come to a tournament because he was playing soccer. I don't think that sat well.

Scott:

Yeah. That's a separate topic.

Jamie:

Yeah. But I and listen, I understand that by the way, because you can't count on a kid that's hard, especially when you start getting to competitive hockey. Yep. Like, and you start trying to win games and and start trying to do something as kids get older. When you're younger, I think that that that you can cut them a little more slack.

Jamie:

When you get older, I think you have to be able to I mean, you have if you're carrying six d and one doesn't show up, that's a problem for a weekend.

Scott:

Yes. I you know? There's a lot of variables. Ultimately, I understand from a coach's perspective because when I was doing that, I wanted to be able to count on people. Course.

Scott:

One hand, do want to encourage kids to play, be multi sport, like athletes, but no coach wants it to be their sport to be the one

Jamie:

that can be That is very true too.

Scott:

They'll be the first ones to say play two sports, but you have to prioritize

Jamie:

Yeah, listen, I get it. Listen, you're not wrong about that statement.

Scott:

But then it also depends on the team's ambitions and how competitive it is. I think that there has to be balance in certain scenarios.

Jamie:

And

Scott:

yeah, it's not easy, but-

Jamie:

No, no it's not. It definitely is not. But yeah, so that's gonna be a topic of conversation today.

Scott:

Well, luck with that.

Jamie:

Yeah, next episode, I will let you know how that went. I'm assuming it'll be fine, but I'm curious, but the manager's like, Jamie, need to speak up and say

Scott:

like- but like, dude, like last year

Jamie:

Just put it on me.

Scott:

Yeah, but listen, last year when we joined a new team last year and we went through like the, after tryouts, went across the street and we went, looked at all, they had gear package set up so you could try things on. It was all laid out nicely. Every year you take the paper, you go down the list and you just check off items that you're getting. You're on the team last year, maybe you don't need a new pair of pants, blah, blah, blah. So we went through this whole elaborate thing and it was very, was organised and they had all the things from gloves to- Socks to

Jamie:

jerseys. To everything. Warm ups, socks, shorts.

Scott:

And so you had to buy a gear pack. They changed logos so everyone had to get new jerseys, for example.

Jamie:

They changed logos last year?

Scott:

Yeah, our jerseys were different.

Jamie:

I didn't realize that.

Scott:

Interesting. But what I'm getting at is then after all of that, which we had to buy warm ups, which like track suit style.

Jamie:

I hate those things, by the way.

Scott:

Fair. But after that, the parents that had been with the organization have other kids that are playing for different teams. All the different teams, they might get, I don't know, a sweat suit from this place or

Jamie:

a

Scott:

water bottle from that place. So our team decided to copy another team and get all like a sweat suit

Jamie:

brand new.

Scott:

So then that became optional as our warmup gear. So now I had to spend whatever I spent on the jacket and the pants, which he never wore, not once. And then we spent another $110 or $20 for a sweatsuit. It's like, why am I buying shit I don't need?

Jamie:

No. I don't buy any of that

Scott:

But me just say something. At the time, I didn't complain about it.

Jamie:

No. No. No. Wouldn't It's

Scott:

not like financially an But it's fucking annoying.

Jamie:

It is annoying. No, you're not wrong. Fucking annoying. I gotta tell you, I stopped buying like, because Dominic doesn't wear it. And I stopped buying like sweatshirt because at the first building we were in, which you were in too, I stopped, I used to have like quarter zips, like a sweatshirt.

Jamie:

I stopped doing all that shit. I stopped buying all that stuff. You know why? Because you change buildings too many times.

Scott:

Cause you do, cause you can change

Jamie:

buildings. Yeah. And all that shit is obsolete. I'm not going to wear

Scott:

that stuff ever again. Dude, I spent too much money in those stupid stores.

Jamie:

So when we first left, I have not bought anything for myself. And even, even Dominic, buy very,

Scott:

very few things.

Jamie:

I don't even buy the bag anymore. Dom has a Pacific rink bag that I just phenomenal. Right.

Scott:

Just a generic.

Jamie:

Like awesome hockey bag, Pacific rink makes phenomenal shit.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

Pacific Rink bags are awesome. They have a spot for your skates. It's Is

Scott:

it a wheelie bag?

Jamie:

No. I don't like those wheelie bags.

Scott:

Wheelie bags are no bueno.

Jamie:

No. The kids should be humping it into the into the rink. But even that is because it's hard to hump a fucking hockey bag.

Scott:

Dude, you've been in like a lot

Jamie:

of Hockey bags.

Scott:

Have you been in a locker room that's too small?

Jamie:

Yeah.

Scott:

And you can't exactly crumble those things up and put them somewhere else. You can't. You can't up floor space.

Jamie:

Well, they have like a they're rigid.

Scott:

I know. The bottom

Jamie:

of them is a frame. Yeah. I hate those wheelie bags. I can't stand those things.

Scott:

I don't prefer them. No.

Jamie:

I don't have one. Me neither. No, no. Dominic throws his bag over his shoulder and goes. And just see and and just so you people know, you can buy a strap for a hockey bag.

Jamie:

And if you put if you go buy the you know the noodles that you float on in a pool?

Scott:

Yes.

Jamie:

You go by the noodle, put a slice down one side so you can open the noodle.

Scott:

Yep.

Jamie:

Wrap the noodle around the straps Yep. Of the hockey Like

Scott:

a cushion.

Jamie:

Tape it with hockey tape or whatever, electrical tape, hockey tape, whatever you wanna tape with, tape it up, and then your kid can it doesn't cut into their shoulder so

Scott:

As badly. Yeah. I've seen that. I've seen a bunch of that.

Jamie:

It's it's, dude, it's so easy and so it's so much better than than than just because some, when the, listen, you want your kid to hump his bag in because it's hard. Right? Like they should be able to carry their own shit. Right. I have not carried my kid's bag in years.

Jamie:

Yeah. And I see parents carrying like 12 year old bags.

Scott:

Well, dude. Like, are

Jamie:

you do? My kid is small. My kid literally almost falls over when he humps his hockey bag. Not now, but he used to when he was nine and eight. Right?

Jamie:

But I would make him carry it constantly. Like, dude, it's your stuff. You carry it. You wanna play this game? You carry it.

Scott:

Yeah. I had there was a I I heard of a story

Jamie:

So that makes it easier to carry at least.

Scott:

Of a coach who actually would didn't insist that kids carry their own bags.

Jamie:

Absolutely.

Scott:

But also commented that kids I forget what the situation was, but there was a kid whose parent was carrying the bag for them And like a comment was made about that. And that where there's a correlation between the kid not carrying the bag and his on ice effort.

Jamie:

Isn't that interesting?

Scott:

Was a that was made by a coach.

Jamie:

I understand that by the way, That and at what age should they be tying their own skates?

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

No more doubt. I have to tell you, I have not walked into a locker room in a very long time.

Scott:

So I've still been going in the locker room.

Jamie:

Do you?

Scott:

I don't like me hanging out in the locker

Jamie:

room with I see, I want no part. Haven't been there in like three years.

Scott:

I don't really

Jamie:

Maybe more.

Scott:

I don't feel like I need to be there.

Jamie:

Right.

Scott:

And I don't mind being there. Right. But at the same time, it's clear.

Jamie:

I feel

Scott:

like there's less and less parents in the locker room.

Jamie:

I feel like it's their space.

Scott:

Me, this spring was like the first time I was in a locker room and I was like, You know what, dude? I'll be back in a few.

Jamie:

That I'm all Then you just leave.

Scott:

But listen, I don't need to sit with him

Jamie:

all It's your way to exit the locker room.

Scott:

I would leave a lot of times. But all I'm saying is that this is the first time where when I left, it was because I was like, yeah, I'm one of two parents here. I think I'm just You do you, you hang out

Jamie:

with your I'll be by the snack bar.

Scott:

Right, before it was like, I had to make a phone call

Jamie:

or whatever.

Scott:

If you need me,

Jamie:

meet me in the hallway, I tie your skates. You know what I mean? Yeah. You know, it listen, it's it's listen, I, again, parents, if you want your kid listen, sometimes depending on the size of your child, it's hard to crank your skates. Once you get out of youth skates and you go into a junior skate, they get a lot more stiff.

Jamie:

Right? I'm swing autos in a junior skate. Yes. Right. Okay.

Jamie:

So, you know, once you get out of a youth skate, the plastic is a lot harder, a lot more rigid. It's hard to crank for some of these kids. The skate key, I know I have a skate key in Dom's back. I haven't seen

Scott:

someone use a skate.

Jamie:

Never used it.

Scott:

Yeah. No one uses that.

Jamie:

Literally never. I've never used it. So like I just crank with my hands. Yeah. You know?

Jamie:

But but Dominic, because the school he was going to, needed to learn how to tie his own skates because he would get on the ice every morning

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

Before school. So he had to figure out how to tie so he was in our living room Just practicing. Just practicing tying skates, tying his skates, tying. If you if you put time into it, it's it's easy.

Scott:

But that's like anything else, dude.

Jamie:

You wanna tie your kids skates for games? Fine. But like, they should be tying them for practice at a certain age.

Scott:

I mean, I I would I would go out to say that, like, they they should have their skates properly tied no matter practice or game, but I understand the point that at a practice, it's easier for someone to adjust the skates potentially. Correct. They come off the ice, it's not like they're leaving a game.

Jamie:

If it's danger thing, that's

Scott:

a whole another story.

Jamie:

Yeah. You don't wanna be dangerous, you know, but the kids should be At what age should they be tying their

Scott:

own skates? Well, that's like, well, I don't know that there's an age per se, but

Jamie:

I would What age should you stop tying

Scott:

with kids? Okay. So Otto's now 12 you. Well, I guess their team is 11 you.

Jamie:

You're 11 you, yeah. Because we're 13 you, so you're 11 you.

Scott:

Is that okay, whatever.

Jamie:

Well, you guys are an 11. You're a pure 11 team. Yes. Right. We're a pure 13.

Scott:

Okay, copy. Whatever we are. Yeah. That, great. I would think that

Jamie:

this '14 birth year.

Scott:

Yes. Right. This would be the year, I don't expect to tie his skates throughout the entirety of the season.

Jamie:

He's a Pee wee minor?

Scott:

Pee wee minor.

Jamie:

Yeah. That makes sense.

Scott:

That's like

Jamie:

where Dom's are doing it in last you kinda Yeah.

Scott:

You pass the torch on those things.

Jamie:

I think so. I think that's appropriate.

Scott:

Fully carry your bag all the time. Like right now, Adam carries his bag, but like if it's like a far walk, he'll halfway, Hey dude, I'm like, Depends if we're coming or going.

Jamie:

Will I help Ask Dominic. I park on the other side of the parking

Scott:

lot. Potentially?

Jamie:

So he has to help.

Scott:

No, you don't.

Jamie:

A %. He looks at me and goes, dad, really? I go, they only fight here.

Scott:

That's amazing.

Jamie:

They need to do hard things.

Scott:

I understand.

Jamie:

Right? Listen, I would rather my kid do hard things at eight, nine, 10 than at 19, 20, 20 one because life is hard.

Scott:

But they're gonna they're gonna do hard things then too. What do you mean? The hard things don't

Jamie:

go But you need to get used to doing things hard and doing them yourself. Today today, Dominic asked me to tell me butter's bagel. I'm like,

Scott:

bro ski.

Jamie:

Sorry, bud. Yeah. I'm like, oh, yeah. I made him clean up after me. Always making push his chair in.

Jamie:

Totally. Like, he said to me, he's like, dad, can you help me? I look at him. I go, he goes, alright, never mind. He knows.

Jamie:

I just give him

Scott:

a look.

Jamie:

Yeah. Because I want him

Scott:

to But now that yeah. They know.

Jamie:

The independence.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

I want him to struggle because when you struggle and you accomplish something, it builds confidence.

Scott:

Yes. I would agree with that.

Jamie:

That's important. There's a lot of helicopter parents that jump in there and do. And I think that's I think you're hurting your child.

Scott:

It can be

Jamie:

just depends

Scott:

on the situation.

Jamie:

Just my

Scott:

opinion. Listen, broadly, I agree with that. Think there's, you know, and we talked about this on another episode where it's more differentiating between like when we're talking about advocating for yourself, like we're clearly doing buttering your bagel at some point or whatever is toast bread, whatever. Perhaps there's like, okay, here's lesson. Your one lesson on how to butter bread.

Scott:

I don't know that you, but you get what I'm saying.

Jamie:

I do. But anyway, do. Should we get into our topic? I don't want to, we're, we're, we're, we're, we could go on forever. You and I.

Jamie:

Oh, so one thing before we jump into our topic, which is integrity, hockey pair integrity. I just want to let people know that we are actually coming to you a couple of days late with this episode. Normally I think our plan is to publish like Monday, early Monday morning, late Sunday night ish moving forward. Right. That's kind of, kind of be like the schedule just so everybody has an idea moving forward.

Jamie:

We we're late today. Hopefully we'll get this out Wednesday ish, maybe Thursday morning ish, you know, depending on, so apologize for being late. We are just to give you guys a heads up. Are trying.

Scott:

No, we're doing.

Jamie:

We are, we're doing, but it's not as easy as I think we expected. We are going to go from a straight up audio podcast to a audio video podcast. So you're going to be able to watch our episodes on YouTube. Yep. Okay.

Jamie:

So, and if you guys want our YouTube is up, if you go to crazy hockey dad's YouTube, there's nothing there yet, but it's up. That's up. Our TikTok is up.

Scott:

It's really helpful.

Jamie:

Crazy Hockey Dads TikTok.

Scott:

Really helpful. Go to our YouTube

Jamie:

with the And Crazy Hockey Dad Twitter. All up, nothing, no content there yet coming shortly.

Scott:

It's all left to the imagination.

Jamie:

Coming shortly. We have a lot of things. We have a lot of things in the work, like a lot we have Instagram's up too. So we Instagram, Twitter, Tik TOK, YouTube, no content yet, but if you want to go subscribe, hit the notification bell, know, so when we do put stuff up that is coming shortly, it will be there and you can see it. Yep.

Jamie:

So we attempted to do a, the video part of this the other day, Sunday,

Scott:

no

Jamie:

Monday,

Scott:

Monday,

Jamie:

Monday, Monday. And, we didn't realize how difficult the lighting is.

Scott:

The lighting is not as

Jamie:

Oh my God.

Scott:

It's annoying.

Jamie:

Oh my God. It's annoying. Important. Very important, but annoying doesn't even we fucked that up so badly. We tried.

Scott:

We'll get

Jamie:

it. We'll get it. But yeah, we ordered a bunch of lights, ordered a bunch of lights, ordered a bunch of cameras, ordered a bunch of tripods. What else? Cabling.

Jamie:

Mean, what else?

Scott:

Things.

Jamie:

Yeah. Things. Stuff. To get this on on on YouTube, the video part of it, you guys can actually see our ugly mugs. And man, did we underestimate the amount of time and effort just in lighting?

Scott:

Yeah. But you know, it's probably like a lot of other things once you kind of figure out what does what and it's causing the effect and whatever. Yeah, but we're good. We're gonna be, it's gonna be awesome.

Jamie:

Oh yeah, it's gonna be great. You kidding me? Because now we're only in two mediums right now. I mean, you could find us in Apple. Apple Podcast is our major and Spotify is our major.

Jamie:

We're not on Google Podcast yet because Google Podcast is YouTube. So we're only in 66% of the like podcast world. And we're still getting a lot of downloads, which is shot, which is unbelievable to me.

Scott:

Listen, dude, it's like you said earlier today that there's these conversations are ones that are either being had or helpful to listen to and it's Yeah. Yeah, for sure. There's a space for continued talk about all of these topics. Yeah. And glad to be a part of it, man.

Jamie:

Yeah, it's a lot of fun. All right, so you want to go into our integrity topic and then we can touch on maybe a little bit of the NHL before we stop?

Scott:

Yeah, yeah. We started talking a little bit about integrity earlier. As a parent, I think along the entire vertical from players to parents to coaches to organizations that there's a lack of integrity that I've certainly come across. And look, I think that things can be, some things are kind of harmless and you just know someone's full And you'll do what you want with that. But I think that the concern and maybe you could speak to some recent, I think recently you came across something, but like you said, it's a small world and people will say things that either put themselves or their kid in a better light at the cost of others only for it to come back around.

Jamie:

They throw people under the bus.

Scott:

And then, so with that, you end up potentially getting yourself blacklisted as extreme, but you develop a You

Jamie:

look like a schmuck.

Scott:

And those things are thought about.

Jamie:

The hockey space is small and most things get back to people. So, you you need to be, I think that it's appropriate to say that you need to be aware, you know, of things you say and how you act because things come back to you.

Scott:

Yeah. And I think we've all been around some bad actors and it's for sure your reputations. And when you have conversations with people people that either that you trust or you're close, they're part of your inner circle and you hear the way people really think about this person the next. Some of it is it's the kid that's going to suffer. It's the kid that's going to suffer because they develop a reputation and then The parent.

Scott:

Yeah. Then at the younger ages, for sure, you have coaches and organizations that are screening families also. Absolutely. So, I mean, it gets different when you get older, right? Because the kids, and then it becomes more on the kid.

Scott:

The parents are less involved. You know, but I think it's really important to think twice before you kind of deviate severely from, you know, moral, ethical, you know, just to make yourself look better because it comes around and ultimately your kid's the one that's probably gonna suffer.

Jamie:

I was talking to a junior coach yesterday. I sat down with him for like an hour and a half.

Scott:

Yeah. Just, oh really?

Jamie:

Yeah. Bullshitting with him.

Scott:

Oh shit.

Jamie:

He played four years at Penn state. Awesome hockey coach. Like this kid, I'm telling you, he's like a 28 year old kid, 29 year old kid, four years at Penn state, phenomenal family, awesome kid, not a case of man, you know, he's, you know, he's almost 30, you know, this I'm telling you right now, he will be on a d one bench one day. No question about it. Like, I'm he I'm shocked he's not there already.

Scott:

And he

Jamie:

will be.

Scott:

And you're saying that because of

Jamie:

He's just a great kid, great hockey mind. I mean, so he, you know, he, he, so he's one of Dominic's coaches of the school Dom goes to, you know, and Dom actually works out with him before school as well. Wow. So Dom goes. Yeah.

Scott:

Wow. That sounds like a crazy hockey dad.

Jamie:

Listen. I mean, yeah. I don't I don't I don't say. Guilty. You I mean, yeah.

Jamie:

I mean, listen. Yes. Yeah. And he's a and he's a great dude. Yeah.

Jamie:

You know? So so listen. If I don't I don't. Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie:

I can't defend myself. No, that's why you're on the Yes. But, but great dude. So I was talking to for like any, and he runs a junior team, you know, and, and, and he was just, I was just listening to him talk and he just kept, and the topic that kept coming up were shitty parents. And he's like, I don't want to take this kid because the parents sucks.

Jamie:

It kept coming up.

Scott:

Really? It

Jamie:

was wild to me.

Scott:

For his junior team?

Jamie:

For his junior team and for like a 15 team he runs.

Scott:

I guess like even if you still have like kids that are in like high school, could only imagine. I think he does

Jamie:

a 10 team too, if I'm not mistaken.

Scott:

Okay, but either way, I guess I was minimizing perhaps how vocal a parent might be just because their kid was in high school, but I'm probably wrong and I'm sure there's plenty of parents that cannot check themselves even when their kids should be advocating for themselves.

Jamie:

And again, this right? Or this guy, like I said, we talked

Scott:

about a small hockey world.

Jamie:

Again, they all know each other. He was talking about a private school up here in this area, the coaches and all the coaches are nuts because he knows, because they're, I'm telling you this hockey world is so small. So when you step out of line and you say something that's not true, people talk in this game. It's go it's going to get back.

Scott:

Yeah. But but that, like, that's also You need to watch what you say

Jamie:

and how you act.

Scott:

Listen, it's not limited just to hockey. I think these are like obviously good life lessons we're talking about through the context of hockey for But

Jamie:

the hockey space for some, and maybe it's every sport, maybe it's lacrosse and baseball. But for some reason the hockey space, I mean, stuff gets around very quickly, like very quickly.

Scott:

Yeah. I don't really have a good basis of comparison, not having been closely or been involved in any other sports that are traveling and competing at the same level.

Jamie:

Neither do I.

Scott:

Listen, I could imagine hockey's not the only one. I do think hockey is strictly from an ice availability standpoint and unfortunately the cost to some extent, there's a smaller community, there's less hockey teams than there's baseball teams.

Jamie:

You would think so.

Scott:

I would think. I mean, at least certainly around tier, So in any event, I know what you're saying about it. Talk and Listen, there's no shortage of people throwing other people under the bus. At the end of the day, it creates a lot of internal conflict. And even if there are parents that it's not necessarily talking with the coaches and the coach thinks that a family is a particular pain in the ass, it's also like if you're creating drama with other families within your

Jamie:

team, like

Scott:

even if it's not directly to the coach, Absolutely. And you might not even say anything to

Jamie:

the It's still a problem.

Scott:

If you ruin it, and whatever ruin really means, but you could be a problem.

Jamie:

Well, you said, the habitual complainer.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

Right? Like You can create a stigma for yourself because you're a pain in the ass. It's a problem.

Scott:

Yeah. And then look, especially then when if you're going out for other teams and it's not just limited to the fall winter teams right? Or the in season teams. Like, there's spring teams and tournament teams

Jamie:

and a

Scott:

whole bunch of other teams.

Jamie:

Right. And all these, and they're all run by the same, they all know each other. This game, they all do. Yeah. You know, so you need to be careful about how you carry yourself.

Jamie:

You need to be careful about what you say, because like we talked about in episode one, people like talking about the hockey space or in the hockey space and they really do. Stuff spreads like wildfire.

Scott:

Yeah, so I guess at this point, the value add here is really like you're going to your parent meeting tonight, I haven't had one yet. There's gonna be a lot of firsts still to come for the families getting together in the team families getting together. And so, when you have those conversations and when you're talking about whatever it might be, it's something just to be mindful of. I think that's the bottom line. Just be mindful.

Scott:

And if you're gonna really go out there walk off, go out there on a limb and just be careful. Careful.

Jamie:

Yeah. Yeah. No, listen. And then don't tell your kid to go off sides if nobody passes them the hockey puck.

Scott:

And there's another example of a lack of integrity, but just a different angle. That's like, telling and go, I don't wanna steal the thunder, but that's a prime example.

Jamie:

So this is a story about when we were squirt minors. There was a dad who I actually like this. I like this father. He's nuts, but I like him. Right.

Jamie:

And his kid is a good, very good hockey player. He was the assistant coach of our team, but he would tell his kid if the puck didn't get moved to him when he was going down the ice, he would tell his kid to go when he said this to me, Scott, I wasn't sure I heard him correctly because he said to me, he goes, Jamie goes, I tell Conor to go off sides.

Scott:

I can't believe he I didn't know that he admitted that to you.

Jamie:

Oh, yeah. He told me. And I was like The fuck? I, like, giggled. I'm like, yeah.

Jamie:

I thought he was joking. Then I watched her in the game. I'm like, holy shit. His kid's doing it. He would go off sides on purpose.

Jamie:

What? How? Bro, like like, that was a it's a real thing. So, like, parents in that and that's I think that's also a problem when parents coach their kids and tell their kids stuff. I remember the, the big power skating coach at the avalanche would say, do not listen to your parents.

Jamie:

Yeah. I don't tell my kid anything. Just tell my kid to go completely.

Scott:

As a coach, I had to tell kids on the bench. There

Jamie:

you go.

Scott:

I'm telling you right now, I don't care what your dad says. That's what he used to say. This is what I'm He

Jamie:

used to say, I don't care what your parent is saying to you. You listen to me. Thing. That's awesome.

Scott:

But like, it's wild. And like you even touched upon it and this is a little digressing a little bit, but just then in the same thinking, you have the kids that are looking to the stands for approval all the time.

Jamie:

Yeah, we talked about that last episode.

Scott:

No, but like to the integrity piece, so there it is a parent who's then telling their kid to intentionally go offsides, which is wrong on so many levels.

Jamie:

I mean, you're burying the

Scott:

team. Just because

Jamie:

the puck doesn't get moved to your kid?

Scott:

The whole thing is like, don't listen to your coach, listen to me. What I'm telling you is like, I don't even know what the right word to assign to that is, but it's wrong.

Jamie:

I mean, you're undermining the head coach.

Scott:

And so that same family based on that, if there's a decision to be made on next year's team between that kid and a kid that's A comparable kid. Comparable, even a little The coaching staff is likely gonna go with the family that has integrity versus a family that doesn't.

Jamie:

No question about it. And listen, it's a problem. Right.

Scott:

But there's also plenty of instances where people that lack integrity or do things that are equally as undermining or un Yeah.

Jamie:

It happens a lot by

Scott:

the But there's a lot of parents that get away with it.

Jamie:

Some, yeah.

Scott:

Well, listen, then you have to then it's like accountability from the team managers and the coaches and the organization to hold parents accountable to whatever the standards True, very true. And a lot of people don't do that also. So it's like there's a wide range of these scenarios and how they play out. And there are people that just happen to get away with it and they'll keep doing it because no one's telling them otherwise and that's a shame. Cause then it drives away other families

Jamie:

that

Scott:

are good families because they don't wanna be part of like a bunch of shenanigans and How

Jamie:

many times have you heard, I'm not staying if this person's staying?

Scott:

I've definitely heard that.

Jamie:

A bunch of us are leaving if this this parent is

Scott:

staying. Then you get a group of parents that are better than holding the organization hostage.

Jamie:

Hostage, yeah.

Scott:

So there's no end to iterations of this. But I think the real takeaway is that it's probably in most people's best interest not to be the person that's,

Jamie:

has the don't want to be a do not want to be a problem. I'm telling you, you do not. Less is more.

Scott:

Less is more.

Jamie:

Right? Less is always more. You know, that's how many parents would you know it happens all the time? How many parents are telling their kids something in the car? That's the exact opposite of what the coach is telling them.

Jamie:

Yes. So happen I guarantee it happens constantly.

Scott:

Right. So part of that

Jamie:

also I didn't play the game, so I'm lucky because I can't tell my kid anything. Just tell my kid to go compete hard. I played every other game but this game.

Scott:

Listen. I would so like

Jamie:

it works for me. Can't even tell my kids. I don't know this game. Just go compete hard.

Scott:

Listen, what I've done in the past is that I've shared with families, here's a playbook. This is the playbook for this season. It's not like, again, we're talking about younger age groups, but this is our breakout and this is D zone coverage. So when you're at home telling your kid X, Y, and Z, it should be consistent with what I'm telling the kids because on one hand, from a coaching perspective at the young age, of course parents are gonna tell their kids that their coach is an idiot. And I wouldn't do that, but people do that.

Jamie:

They do.

Scott:

So at the same time, there's only so much a coach can do to control some of this stuff. And I think part of it includes transparency. And if you're gonna talk your kid's ear off about this, well, maybe you should understand what I'm asking of your kid because you might think that he's doing the wrong thing. But in fact,

Jamie:

that's what I want to

Scott:

parents wouldn't know that.

Jamie:

And I guarantee you that happens all the time in this game. Because I've heard, I've actually, how many times have you heard parents come up to you and you're like, and he's like, oh, my kid's doing this. He's doing this wrong. He's doing that. He's doing that wrong.

Jamie:

And the coach is like, I thought he played a great game.

Scott:

Yeah. Right? Because the parents are looking at different things. Absolutely. There's not always such a wide gap between what one sees is right and the other doesn't.

Scott:

No question. But on the early ages, you want to talk about, what's something that's common besides not passing the puck, which isn't really like

Jamie:

Yeah, that's very common at the young ages.

Scott:

But even just some basic positioning stuff, you know what I Maybe, I don't know, a dad thinks the kid's for checking hard enough, but meanwhile the coach hasn't been like F2 position F3.

Jamie:

F3 is up high. In the high slot. Absolutely.

Scott:

Dad, was supposed to be there.

Jamie:

That's not

Scott:

how you play

Jamie:

the game.

Scott:

I don't care what your coach says.

Jamie:

And listen, and unfortunately when a dad says, or even a mom says that to a kid, he thinks that so then he doesn't respect the coach as much. Yeah. And the coach, you know, loses a little bit of, you know, you know, kind of rubs off on the kid, you know, where the coaches now, the kid thinks coach is a schmuck, and it's just not a good situation. And listen, maybe the coach is a schmuck. Don't get me wrong.

Jamie:

He might be. Right. You know, but when, when that's why I always say to parents and I've said this before on this podcast, don't say things about the coach or other parents or other kids front of your kid. Cause they take that.

Scott:

Dude, I've heard parents tell their kids that their coach is the reason why they're getting screwed.

Jamie:

That's what I mean. And listen, and you know, we're talking about integrity and

Scott:

accountability, right?

Jamie:

I mean, there's a story from with that has to do with me recently. So, so just, I guess kind of like a recap, I was involved with, you know, I was involved, we'll go on to the NHL after this. I'll tell you quick story. I was involved in putting together a very high level, 12 team and we were squirt majors.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

Right. So the first year me and two other parents were very involved in like grabbing kids from other organizations, because we could only take two because it was a AAA to AAA. So we can only take, so we put together this super team, right, which now is number two or three in the country for the 12 birth year. It was a ridiculous amount of work. I would never do it again, but I'm proud that we did it because we did something that that is not gonna be replicated.

Jamie:

It's just not. Like, you need a certain type of parent to do it because a coach is not gonna do what we did. Right. No no chance. No fucking way.

Jamie:

One of these days, we'll have those two on our podcast here, and the five of us will talk or the four of us will talk. Some of the stories from what we did just to get that team up and running were fucking wild. So one of the parents that we brought over to play with us the first year played with us. They're from Upstate New York.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

Okay. They, so then we brought in, like we had a coach the first year, which is fine. Then we brought, then the organization brought in like a real coach, like a guy that didn't have another job. Like this is what he does. He's just a hockey coach.

Jamie:

The organization we were with wanted guys that were just hockey guys, period. End of story. They didn't want you to be like an accountant and then come to the rank as a second job.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

Right. So the organization went out and grabbed this guy. I happened to know this guy. I know a lot of people in this bit, in this game because my kids skated everywhere. So I knew a lot of people.

Jamie:

Right? So he came to our organization and he took over the team. And when he came, which was our plan from the beginning. When he came, we said, real hockey coach, the team is yours. You do whatever you want to do with it.

Jamie:

We are hands off now.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

It was great because we put it together the first year. It worked. We finished fifteenth in the country. It was great. Then he came in and we're like, you know what?

Jamie:

It's all yours now. We don't want to do any of this stuff. We put it together. We're now it's on autopilot. It's done.

Jamie:

We'll help you with a little bit of scheduling and then like the ancillary ship behind the scenes, but now it's all you.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

Okay. So this one parent, I remember he kept coming to us and he, and because their tryouts were at a different time, they wanted assurances. Okay. From us that their kid would make the team, there was a spot for him And the parents, we had nothing to do with

Scott:

it now.

Jamie:

It's a coach. We kept saying, go ask him. Right. Like, we're not and he kept saying, well, our tryouts are earlier. If we don't do anything, we're and then we get cut from your team.

Jamie:

We because he was coming into Jersey to play.

Scott:

Yeah. No. I understand.

Jamie:

Right? Yeah. But just for the context for

Scott:

the Oh, sorry.

Jamie:

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So he's coming to Jersey. He's like, listen.

Jamie:

If we don't go to a New York team, if we if we don't take a spot and we get don't make the Jersey team, we may not have a place to play. So I said to them, listen, it's a risk you're going to have to take. And we kept saying them, just come to trials. We couldn't, again, it wasn't our choice. It was the coach's choice.

Jamie:

Like go talk to him, you know? So, you know, so he, he didn't wind up coming because he, because he's a nervous guy. So he didn't wind up coming. He, he, he signed with some New York team. They had a rough year.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

Right. And I find out like the other day that this parent was telling the parents of the new team that he's mad at us because we couldn't give him assurances. He's like, yeah, they fucked us. Cause I'm more like, so the three of us got together were like, fucked you. What are you talking about?

Jamie:

Like, the coach picked the team, not us. Right. We had nothing to do with it.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

He knew that by the way. This is not a stupid guy. Right. But he knew that. So I ran into him the other day.

Scott:

So he he made it so, like, he was the victim.

Jamie:

Like, he was the victim.

Scott:

And and, like, it wasn't because he didn't wanna take a chance of showing up to tryouts.

Jamie:

Scott, he made a choice. Yeah. And I gotta tell you, which he fucked up royally because if he had just come to tryouts, his kid would have been picked by the coach.

Scott:

Oh, you know that. I do. Knew you did you know that After

Jamie:

the fact I said that to him, I go, listen, I go, I told you, I go, we, the three of us told you to come to tryouts. Didn't wanna listen. And he didn't. And and now and now

Scott:

he's Now it's your fault.

Jamie:

Now he's blaming the three of us. We and he's he he was telling people when he went up there because I have a friend of mine whose kid plays up there. He's like, Jamie, he's like, he's going on telling people that you that you guys fucked him. And I was like,

Scott:

what? Any chance that you have to to, like, to as far as defend yourself, of course you're gonna say that's not what happened.

Jamie:

Of course I told this one then

Scott:

it's like, oh, well so and so is dishonest. And it's not long before he has that reputation if he keeps on doing his business.

Jamie:

Isn't that a shame though?

Scott:

And then who's the one that gets screwed? The king.

Jamie:

Isn't that a shame though? I gotta tell you now, this parent is on my shit list. Because I don't trust this parent as far as I could fucking throw him. What a douchebag.

Scott:

And you're probably not gonna bite your lip too tightly if you're in a position where you could share that information.

Jamie:

No, because I just shared it with a lot of people. Exactly. Well, listen, I gotta tell you, you know, I don't care. I don't fucking care if you don't like me. I don't care.

Jamie:

But don't lie about me. That's bullshit. Right. That's that's total shit. And you're a really, you're a weasel for that.

Jamie:

I'm sorry. Anybody, I'm not just talking about the hockey space. If you lie about somebody like you're a weasel, sorry. You are. Yeah.

Jamie:

Like you can't do that shit. Sorry.

Scott:

But people do. It's better, it's better not to have that reputation.

Jamie:

Yes. Because I got to tell you, you know, listen, and it always comes back to bite these people. I'm telling you, you may leave an organization because like, you don't want your kid to play there anymore. You don't jive with the coach. You want something else for your kid, you know?

Jamie:

And that's fine. As long as you're honest, Hey, listen, I'm looking here and they may not like it, but at least you're being honest with them. Like I'm leaving, you know, But you have to be like, listen, when I left that high level team, I left because my kid fell apart. He wasn't good enough. I wasn't blaming the coach.

Jamie:

I didn't blame the coach for playing time. Right. I didn't blame the, you know, I didn't blame the organization. Like it wasn't, he fell apart. Right.

Jamie:

You know?

Scott:

And you owned that. Not necessarily you owned it until was your fault, but like you were trying to go around and like paint a different picture.

Jamie:

Absolutely. I didn't go to our new team go, yeah, they fucked us.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

I tell everybody, like I've said on this podcast, my kid fell apart. I'm not trying to hide it. He fucking fell apart. Literally went from like this to this, like a massive crater that he, that he fell from and listen, it happens. But you know what?

Scott:

It's what you do with it.

Jamie:

It's what you do with And in my opinion, my kid, Dominic is a better person today because he failed like that. Because he realized that he now picked himself back up

Scott:

Yep.

Jamie:

And is now moving forward.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

And that's important. But I didn't go around going, oh, man. They fucked us. Oh, man. Jesus Christ, Dominic played two minutes in the in the finals game, which he did.

Jamie:

I think he played like three minutes in the last game. I wasn't going around going, oh, man. He fucked us.

Scott:

Yeah. And you you know what? Like

Jamie:

Wasn't good enough.

Scott:

And you and like, as you're saying this, like, I think that there's plenty of people that will will just develop the reputation of someone who's like, I don't know, you keep your distance from them intentionally but then it's like just, you never know who's going to be on the other end of what you're saying.

Jamie:

And who they know,

Scott:

who they talk And who know because it's a small world and you could be talking to someone even crazier than you who's then going to blow that out. It's just the best thing to do is less is more.

Jamie:

I was just going to say less is more. Is more

Scott:

you know. It's true. Maintain integrity.

Jamie:

Try to because it comes back to you. And listen, that parent will never be in my inner circle. Never. It's a shame.

Scott:

Right.

Jamie:

But it happens all the time in this game. Yeah. Just be honest. Even if it's not what somebody wants to hear, should be honest.

Scott:

It's like You know?

Jamie:

Because it comes

Scott:

back to That's one of the first lessons, the golden rule.

Jamie:

That's right. It winds up, unfortunately it winds up hurting some kids sometimes though, which sucks.

Scott:

Yeah, well, I mean, look. Set a good example for your kids. Do right by your other families that are on your team. Yes, try to. Be a good person.

Jamie:

Yes, try to be the bigger person even if there's some schmucky people out there. Yes. You know? Like I wanted to tear into that father the other day when I ran into him.

Scott:

Oh yeah, so what did you tell him?

Jamie:

I didn't.

Scott:

You didn't say anything?

Jamie:

I didn't.

Scott:

Okay.

Jamie:

I was going to. I was really close too.

Scott:

But you bit your tongue?

Jamie:

I did.

Scott:

Because there was no real upside at that

Jamie:

point? And there were kids

Scott:

around. That always rubs it.

Jamie:

So it would have been inappropriate. I good hockey dad ed. Good. Good for you. Yeah.

Jamie:

Appreciate

Scott:

it. You get like a special badge this week.

Jamie:

I should. Yes. You know, because listen, because it took a lot for me to bite my tongue. Cause I was not happy.

Scott:

I'm gonna get you a sticker. You should.

Jamie:

A crazy hockey dad sticker.

Scott:

If you're lucky.

Jamie:

Nice. I like it. All right. So since we are running long in the tooth, let's talk about, let's talk about the, the NHL next time. Round one was ridiculous.

Scott:

It was ridiculous.

Jamie:

So maybe we'll actually, since we're late doing this one, maybe we can publish another one like Friday ish. Maybe we can.

Scott:

Maybe. Maybe we can. I'm not gonna

Jamie:

no, no, you don't

Scott:

give me Over promise and under deliver.

Jamie:

Yeah, yeah. Cause I want get it to the NHL because the NHL, the first round was bananas.

Scott:

Was totally bananas. It was so amazing.

Jamie:

Yeah. I can't believe the last ugh. The last two games, sevens?

Scott:

Oh my God. Dallas. Oh my God. The I

Jamie:

oh my God.

Scott:

And Winnipeg?

Jamie:

Oh my God.

Scott:

Like what?

Jamie:

Those games were What? I mean, Nico Ranton. What? Are they

Scott:

Ranton.

Jamie:

Four points?

Scott:

Like, James

Jamie:

Patrick and an assist? Like, game seven? How Talk about shoving it down your old team's throat.

Scott:

Dude, how satisfying was that for him? Oh my

Jamie:

I think he had eight points in the last two games. Does somebody single handedly knock them out. That was And the come back was just retarded.

Scott:

I mean, like, I'm glad for Hellebuck. I mean, because honestly, like, I'm not gonna say that he was amazing or terrible.

Jamie:

I'm curious to see how he plays in round two.

Scott:

Well, that's let's go get ready tonight.

Jamie:

Listen, you got Ottendrick going at your, your USA starter and USA backup. That's what you got right there.

Scott:

That'll be good.

Jamie:

It is. You know what? I was, I was glad to see Hellebuck beat Bennington. I'm not gonna lie.

Scott:

Why? Because of the four

Jamie:

Cause lost him in four nations. So I was glad to see that. I was very happy to see that. And so we'll see. And then, and then, and then last the re you know, round two started.

Jamie:

I can't believe Florida lost to Toronto.

Scott:

I can, I can believe it?

Jamie:

I didn't think it was gonna happen like that. Fair. It went down Oh two pretty quickly.

Scott:

Yeah. Fair.

Jamie:

You know? I'm curious to see if, if Florida can steal one in Toronto. I'm curious how that, how that series plays out. We'll see.

Scott:

But it was a good start for Toronto. Edmonton last night,

Jamie:

they I can't stand Edmonton.

Scott:

But they dude, they look good last night. I mean, like, they're in the second period. I think, like

Jamie:

Vegas was Vegas was was in control of that game early.

Scott:

But they weren't, like, nonexistent in the second period.

Jamie:

%. They went up they went up to nothing. Stone scored and I think I can't remember who scored the first goal, then Stone had a nice second goal. And then all of a sudden, like, they don't score again.

Scott:

That dry settle goal was like, what a fluke. Listen. But it happens, right? Like, that's not like the craziest thing you've ever seen.

Jamie:

No, listen. And they won what, four-two?

Scott:

Yeah, think so. Yeah, they ended up like that game switched around they looked like a strong team.

Jamie:

Yes, they did.

Scott:

If they can keep playing like that, that's a good sign for them.

Jamie:

Yeah. The goalie may be an issue for them.

Scott:

That's like the biggest. Yeah. That may be a problem for them,

Jamie:

but listen, we'll see what happens.

Scott:

And then I know we said we'll talk about it next time,

Jamie:

but

Scott:

Washington, you want Washington Carolina you watched?

Jamie:

I did. I thought Carolina was far superior. Yeah. Even though it was one nothing for a long time. Yeah.

Jamie:

Well, nothing Washington. I'm pretty sure that they outshot them like 35

Scott:

to like

Jamie:

fourteen, thirty five, 13. Yeah. Like if you watch the game, Carolina was the far better team.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

Like not even close.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

You know, they're a very good hockey team. And can you imagine, I mean, don't forget they had Mika Rantanen and then they had Jake Genssel.

Scott:

And Nachis?

Jamie:

Well, yes. Yes. Yes. And they had Nachis too. Yes.

Jamie:

But Nachis was in the was in the Nachis in

Scott:

the He was in original trade in the Rantanen.

Jamie:

He was in the Rantanen trade.

Scott:

That brought Rantanen to Right.

Jamie:

Right. But listen, Stancoven scored last night. Stancoven came

Scott:

from He's legit.

Jamie:

Yeah. He was nasty. He he's I heard a interview with him. I think I'd spit in Chiclets. Yeah.

Jamie:

He seems like a like he's got his shit screwed on straight.

Scott:

Dude, these guys are dialed in, man.

Jamie:

I love watching the young kids like Nyes. I love watching these young snug rude. Love

Scott:

watching these

Jamie:

Oh, he's filthy.

Scott:

Yeah. He's he's wow. Snug rude too is doing awesome. Listen,

Jamie:

how is Toronto gonna pay all these people? Marner is a free agent. Yep. You know, Nye's needs more money now.

Scott:

Yep. Well, he's still on his, like, his But

Jamie:

if you pay Marner big money, where are you coming up with money?

Scott:

Well, I mean, but then there's also, the the salary cap is going up. I don't know to what listen.

Jamie:

I don't know. You tell me Nye's is not gonna command, like A lot. 8,000,000 a year?

Scott:

There yeah. No.

Jamie:

He's Marner's gonna be big money?

Scott:

I I don't I don't know the, like, contract numbers. Yeah. Well, I mean

Jamie:

I don't think Marner stays.

Scott:

Well, we're gonna see. Something's probably gonna have to give.

Jamie:

Yes. Agreed.

Scott:

But Yeah. That's not now. Now is round two. Yes. And Yeah.

Scott:

They're looking good.

Jamie:

No. The playoffs are awesome. Yeah. I'm I'm curious to actually hear, and I haven't looked, but I'm curious to hear what the viewership is like. I'm I'm guessing it's probably impressive.

Jamie:

That's what I think. Oh. Round one was ridiculous.

Scott:

Yeah.

Jamie:

And it was round one.

Scott:

There were some I mean, some of those matchups were insane.

Jamie:

Dude, our Stanley Cup champion that we picked is out of the Stanley Cup playoffs.

Scott:

Yes. So now I'm hoping now now now with that said, I am I am in full Oiler mode.

Jamie:

Oh, not me.

Scott:

Yes. Oilers Toronto finals.

Jamie:

Oh no. I'm in You don't

Scott:

love that?

Jamie:

I don't like Toronto.

Scott:

But you don't like that matchup? Love that matchup?

Jamie:

So Toronto, even though Toronto has a lot of firepower.

Scott:

Who'd you rather see in the finals? If so now that now that the Kings are out and also Dallas, I mean,

Jamie:

I'm dressed.

Scott:

So Who do want out of

Jamie:

the West? So so so Dallas so Mira Haskinen is coming back this round and so is Robertson. Okay.

Scott:

So you want Dallas to go all

Jamie:

the way? I'm not saying I want them to go all the way, but I think they're going to.

Scott:

So you think it's gonna be Dallas now?

Jamie:

I do. Because don't because they just beat the avalanche with their without their best offensive player and without their best defensive player. Listen. Think about

Scott:

that. That's and that's super remarkable.

Jamie:

It's ridiculous. And and I think, McKinnon actually said in an interview after he lost game seven, he's like, we lost to them without their best defender and without their best offensive player.

Scott:

So, like, where where do we go from here?

Jamie:

Right. Where do

Scott:

And they they like

Jamie:

What do you do? Yeah. How do you do that? You know? So listen.

Jamie:

I understand. I would like to see the Florida panthers play the Dallas stars. But listen. Want an all you

Scott:

want an all USA final, and I want an all Canada final.

Jamie:

Yeah. I think Toronto's nasty, and I think Carolina's nasty as long as, what's his name? Who's a goalie for I'm blanking the goalie for Carolina. Fred, Freddie Anderson. Who am I why am I blanking on?

Scott:

I don't know

Jamie:

who the goalie is for. As long as he because I think he just got an extension. I'm I'm pretty sure. As long as he can, as long as he can stay dialed in, I guess. I think there'll be it is.

Jamie:

Yeah. It's Frederick Anderson. Yeah. As long as he because I think he just got an extension for, like, like, 2 and a million, 2 and 3 quarter million.

Scott:

Oh, nice.

Jamie:

Yeah. For next year. As long as he can keep them the puck out of the net, I think they're filthy. Slavin's filthy. I I think they have a I I think they're they're a very nasty team.

Scott:

Listen. It's gonna continue to be must watch TV, I think.

Jamie:

Yeah. It's gonna be fun. Yep. So we'll talk about it next time. How does that sound?

Scott:

Perfect.

Jamie:

Alright. Bye. That was a lot of fun. Everybody subscribe, share the show. Go go go subscribe to our socials that are not they're up there, but there's nothing on them yet.

Jamie:

But we really appreciate all the support and, we really like doing this. So we're going to continue to do it.

Scott:

All right, my man. Bye. See you.