Neuronirvana - Ep 7: Sharon Lea Anne Anyos

In this episode, I interview Sharon Lea Anne Anyos. Sharon is a retired Australian featherweight boxer, kickboxer, karate competitor and model. She holds multiple world titles in boxing, including winning the first ever WBC World Female Featherweight title in 2005 against Marcela Acuna and has also recently been the first female added to the boxing hall of fame.

What is Neuronirvana Podcast?

“Start and end each day with gratitude to break the chains of a negative attitude”
Welcome to the Neuironirvana podcast where you can join wellbeing practitioner Ryan Baker as he takes his guests on a deep dive into the world of mental health and wellbeing. Anything that can improve your life, he’s here to talk about. Enjoy!

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Speaker 0 (0s): This is a podfire production.

Speaker 1 (4s): Hi, I'm Ryan and welcome to the Neuronirvana podcast, where we dive into everything to do with mental health and wellbeing that can improve your life. We're here to talk about. All right, welcome to this week's episode of Neuronirvana. This week's episode, we're bringing on Sharon Anyos, do I pronounce that? Right? So Sharon is five times world champion for boxing. She's also getting inducted into Queensland, Australia and international hall of fames.

Is that correct?

Speaker 2 (37s): Yeah, I've already been done in Queensland and I'm just about to be inducted into Australian hall of fame, which has been a journey and the international women's hall of fame. I was meant to be an American lot, two years ago, but with all these shutdowns, given it being locked down, it was a bit hard.

Speaker 1 (50s): Yeah. So I've got to just watch the way I speak to Sharon, because it could be a little, you know, NA and I, and so currently Sharon is doing a lot of, she's always been a beautiful person, always been a part of my life in the last five years as she just saw on that brings a lot of joy and always fun to be around. And so I think that when we first connected, we had a lot of fun and yeah, so Sharon's also got four boys. I don't know if she does it cause they're all crazy. But yeah, when you go there, there's a lot of chaos, but it's yeah, they they're good boys.

And welcome to the episode.

Speaker 2 (1m 24s): Very, very grateful to be here. When you talk about chaos, you do need to probably let everyone know. You're the one that actually taught them how to back flip into my pool off rocks that went too close to my pool. And you did you back flip off my roof as well?

Speaker 1 (1m 39s): Yeah.

Speaker 2 (1m 41s): And so obviously we always, you know, whatever's in you, you're seeing someone else. So when Ryan saying he sees craziness in him, he's got that natural ability, but I think they've kind of followed in your footsteps and everything. That's fun and natural and sporty, and that's kind of where they're at. And if Ryan can backflip from somewhere or do something, then that's what they want to do.

Speaker 1 (1m 60s): Yeah, definitely. No, it's always been heaps of fun. All right. So let's go back actually. No, we'll start with your boxing career. Walk us through a day in the life of Sharon becoming world champion.

Speaker 2 (2m 17s): Oh my goodness. Sorry. That was a little while ago. My dad will love this. I used to hide chocolates under my mattress cause I would be on a pretty strict like aiding regime, as you can imagine. And it

Speaker 1 (2m 32s): Was,

Speaker 2 (2m 35s): Well, I'll come to that, but I, I kind of fought at featherweight. So it was like I had to be under, oh, it was 57 kilos just under 57 kilos, 1 26 pounds in America because everything's kind of done in pants and oh my gosh, when I started off, I definitely wasn't 1 26 pounds when I come up and moved to the gold coast and followed mum and dad backing out. And I, I was a 1 19 97. I think it was, I do know it was 9 97. You know, I was kind of quite large. It's probably about 95 kilos then.

And I remember dad taking me for a run on the beach for the first time. And I had sneakers on, I hadn't really run on the beach, has done lots of karate and stuff all my life, but was so busy working and just doing adult things, you know? And I remember in, take me for a run and we go down to burrow beach and he said, we're running all the way to, we're gonna run to surface and back. And I was like, oh my gosh, this is really hard. And the Sam was soft and I thought, I'm not gonna run down where the water is. And I thought in the back of my head, I thought if I get my shoes really wet and they're really heavy, I might be able to stop.

And he just said, keep running. So,

Speaker 1 (3m 42s): And it was shortcuts, never worked people.

Speaker 2 (3m 45s): Absolutely. They don't, unless you already tried and tested and you know, the shortcut is actually going to work in your favor, but stopping definitely wasn't going to work in my favor. And he just said, just keep running, wait, not stopping. I'm not as scared of my dad and asked her if he said keep running up, like, hang on. I also had another little bit of a trick. There was these two beautiful dogs, like, yeah, like, is it Jake? And the fat man that sitcom that used to be on there was that like a bulldog little fat bulldog on it. It was like as long time ago.

So there'd be one of them and a box of dog. And every morning when we'd run, I'd have to stop and give them a car cuddling and kissing. They play playing. He'd be like, well you get up and run. But literally every day consisted of, I would wake up like while it was still dark, I'd always run anywhere from five to probably 18 kilometers. And then I'd go home and I'd rest in both three o'clock, we'll be back in the gym and I'd be doing probably back then. It would be 30, 40 rounds would be mix of skipping shadowboxing pad work bag work. And then probably three, four times a week back then I'd spa.

So aspire isn't when you get to lay in water and have fun and kind of think it feels lovely. It's actually a way of, someone's going to try and punch you in the face and you're in the ring and you've got a time when you can't stop because their job is to make sure you work hard. And I think the biggest thing for me is I never, ever trained. I trained alongside women, but I didn't train with them for my performance. I would train with them for their performance, anything to do with me getting married for font. If I was doing a 10 round sparring session, I would have five different men there. And every two rounds of fresh guy would get in.

So I kind of learnt really quickly, you know, when I was competing that I would just get stronger every round because I had to, like, it just got instilled into me, subconsciously that ran three, it's gotta be fresh and round five, it's going to be fresh in round seven. It's going to be fresh. I just had to keep digging deeper. And I used to only run and train alongside men for me because my whole mental process was if I can, if I could train with people where I had to become fitter faster, stronger, then that's what would push me, push me.

But if I was trying to be some of those were on the same level as me, it wouldn't be able to push me to that point.

Speaker 1 (5m 54s): Of course. Yeah. That's like anything in life, I suppose you always go hang around, people train with people that are better. You always going to get better. And

Speaker 2 (6m 2s): So lately absolutely. And that's, that will be me to something that, you know, it's easy to kind of fall backwards and kind of isolate ourselves in times where things are tough and also maybe hang around with people that are probably not going to bring up the business as well. Yeah. And I think it just in that space there, what we're talking about that I just want to kind of bring out that I think in all of my years of training and being around so many men, look, I really, you see what happens to them emotionally and when they think they're enough or not enough.

And look, I remember being at a Tony Robbins event and I'm standing beside one of my other best friends. You are one of them, but, and Jacobs, and like, Tony's got the whole crowd guy. And like, I'm like, I mean, Sydney, I'm like, I can't believe you're here. We're standing next to each other and you're not going to believe that. But when he says on the count of three, I went in to yell at your biggest fear. Right? So both of us are sat next to each other, the music's going and he's like one, two. And guess what? We both had exactly the same thing. They were both world champions. We've both done incredible things.

Right. And we both yelled out. I am not enough.

Speaker 1 (7m 10s): I was just about to say, I bet it is. Or not enough. That's almost a universal belief that we all have at some level I do believe. And that's something that we've all got to work on trying to untrain that, or I suppose, cause it's, I think it's instilled to us at such a young age, through the, whatever it was through, whether it's through parenting or collective consciousness or, or whatever you want to call it. But it's something that all of us suffer and that doesn't surprise me one a little bit.

And I think 95% of the room would've said something very similar.

Speaker 2 (7m 46s): Absolutely. But it was like, shit, I'm not, can you say that on this podcast,

Speaker 1 (7m 55s): Shut the fuck up. Sharon, say hurry up.

Speaker 2 (7m 58s): 'cause I was like, I actually didn't say shit. I was like, fuck. He thinks the same as me. And I think kind of fast forward another 15 years, 20 years. And now I'm like, I literally just, for me, I'm, I'm enough and more for everything that I step into, like I've been able to reprogram myself. And, and when you talk about parenting and stuff, I just, I want to share something I've been watching. Cause my kids like to watch the same. Like if it's a movie, we don't have normal TV, we don't watch the news. We don't watch anything that's going on. We don't buy the newspaper.

I kind of go into a space of always creating my own reality, like constantly. And I live in the question all the time and you know, I always ask myself like, does this feel light for me to feel heavy? It feels heavy. It's not, for me energetically. It feels like definitely it is. And I, I get my boys to kind of make all their own decisions as well. Like I'm really, I really push, even though I school my kids from home.

Speaker 1 (8m 48s): That's a quick question on that. So can you distinguish in the feeling what's cause obviously whether it feels heavy, but something that is difficult, like, okay. If I told you to do like, you know, a hundred burpees, that would feel pretty heavy, but yeah. It's good for you. So how do you distinguish

Speaker 2 (9m 8s): Between sort of

Speaker 1 (9m 9s): Like a fear or, or not so much a fear, but there are certain subtleties to the feelings where some could be fear based and be the wrong thing, but some could be fear based would be the right thing, I suppose.

Speaker 2 (9m 23s): So even if it's fear-based so you saying to me a hundred burpees, my buddy goes absolutely right. Energetically. I'm like a hundred burpees. My heart, my lungs would be like, oh my God, it's going to take a while. Can we just take like two at a time? Right. But so energetically, my body will feel light because I know it's good for me. Okay. So even if it's fear based, so if you say to me, you know, we're going to go and come and do a podcast, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That felt lot for me. So I was like, absolutely 100% had no idea, really what we're going to be discussing at the time when you asked, I just said yes, but if you asked me and it felt heavy.

So we organized it for a certain day and there was some stuff going on with my kids that felt heavy for me that day. So I was like, is there any chance we can move it? And here we are now. So that's the, what I mean by a lot of heavy, even if you're afraid of something, your energy and your body will be saying, yes, that's really good for us. Do you know what I mean? Rather than, you know, if someone says we're going to go for a walk out on the beach for five kilometers, the energy, even though you might be afraid of say goals, sand, sunshine, whatever. It may be. The energy of your buddy is art.

Oh, sunshine, water, sand. That feels light. Yeah. So you will, if you, if you ask yourself, so let's just say, somebody brings you up. Well, somebody else he could you join to come at you and do these two and do whatever and go, go for lunch. Or you might, the phone might ring. You might just do I want to answer the phone, right? Does that feel a lot of heavy? You don't always have to answer the phone. So I just go straight into that spot because if it feels heavy, this could be something on the phone that you don't need to deal with right now. It could be something you could deal with tomorrow.

We need a different state.

Speaker 1 (11m 2s): I guess the reason why I ask this question is, you know, I deal with and talk to a lot of people with anxiety and especially depression and getting out of bed to them would feel heavy. You know what I mean? Whereas they've got to get a bed. So I guess I'm trying to, I'm trying to pinpoint or, or trying to discuss and find out what is the little discrepancies, because I know like a lot of people just be like, well, I don't. Yeah. Feeling good at getting out of bed could feel very heavy.

Speaker 2 (11m 32s): So maybe could you ask a different question? So instead of do I want to get out of bed today? Not many people do want to get out of bed, especially when it's cold as well. But when you go, when we go into people that are dealing with anxiety and depression and all that kind of thing, instead of do I want to get a bed today, could ask another question. Could a bay, do I want to show up and help the rest of the team today? Does that feel out of heavy? Do I want to just go and make my boss happy today? Do I want to don't see my mates today? Do you know what I mean? So if we move it from, what's a different outcome rather than the outcome of just trying to get out of bed.

Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12m 8s): So you do, do you do any sort of like kinesiology, like, you know, muscle testing or stuff? Or is it just, just a feeling for you? Yep.

Speaker 2 (12m 16s): Well, I've I've muscle tested for a long time. So now for me, I just do a lot of heavy. So even if I'm to give you another example, like I had a couple of people come into my house a couple of years ago to interview them about cleaning up my house. And one of them knocked on the door. And this is what is really important that believe in you gut feeling and believe in what if actually feels loud or heavy because one had got there and before I even opened the door, I was like, oh, this just feels really heavy. And I haven't even seen it.

Right. It happens to be that she came in, she was Italian, hardly spoken English. Didn't know how to talk to the children. Didn't really know how to talk to anyone. I'm making her a cup of coffee. I'm always super kind when it comes to people working, because they're a part of my foundation. They don't, I'm not their boss. I don't say it. Is that why I believe our team. Yeah. And I just knew straightaway. And then the next girl that come before I even opened the door, I just felt, okay, this is the one I hadn't even spoken to her. Yeah. So it's, it's incredible. What signals your body will give you to tell you, Hey, this is good for you or this is probably not so great.

Yeah.

Speaker 1 (13m 21s): Yeah. I, I guess I'm still trying to grasp. I'm still trying to, cause I know when it comes to say someone that's had some trauma or whatever, like things are going to feel not right in their body when they are actually are right. Because they've gone through a certain trauma or tri tribulation or, or they've gone through some experience, which will trigger an emotional response. That will feel heavy even though that's probably the right thing that they should do. I'm just wondering yeah. How they can distinguish the difference is that kind of

Speaker 2 (13m 53s): Makes sense. So emotions are when energetically, when I look at emotions, emotions are distractor implant that distract us from being who we're meant to be. I was going to get back in

Speaker 1 (14m 5s): The bottle.

Speaker 2 (14m 5s): Yeah. I was going to, well, I was going to go back and talk about when we talk about what seeds are planted. And I also met my kids watching movies, right? So there's this one, not now because I'm probably more aware and awake of, what's kind of happening out in the world, you know? And then how we being programmed through movies and TV and news and all that kind of thing. No one ever has to buy my theory at all. Dick, just go with your own. But one thing I've noticed, so the boys have been watching this movie, which is troubling.

So it started obviously Topia. Then it went to see trouble. This is a name. And it's about this little bunny whose parents are a carrot farmer. And then she wants to be a police officer in the big city. And then the, the, the parents say things like the father says things like, you sure this is what you want to do. Like your mother and I, we settled hard. We settled hard. And she said, oh yeah, we definitely settled hard. Like we settled for just what we could get rather than what we could, what, what was possible. And then when she, when she makes it into, like, she just got hammered through all the testings and she finally made it into the police force.

And these big, big, you know, I don't know whatever he was horns. He was the big boss. And he just said, you measly little, this, that, and everything else. She think that you're going to just wish and work to do something and think you're going to get somewhere in life. Well, let me tell you that's never going to happen. Right. So we don't even realize it in the movies that we watch. There's sub consciously programming is that we're never enough. It doesn't matter how hard we try. Right. So sometimes when, so when we look at okay, emotion, emotions, that distractor implant.

If, if we all got to being in a very present moment, not thinking about what happened in the past, not thinking about what we were doing in the future. And you're in a present moment. There's like no emotion because you just hear that people are going to go. That just sounds freaking ridiculous. One of my sons, Billy, he's got down syndrome. This boy is a present moment kid, right? It's not always easy, But he's very present moment. And he's got bigger and stronger.

Now he plays basketball and everything as well does gets his pop to teach him how to box, but he's very present. So it doesn't matter. What's going on. If you're sitting there having a conversation with him and your phone rings and you pick up your phone and put your phone down, like we're talking, or if he's having a cuddle with you and 20 people walked through the door and you look up, he'll bring your face back to him. Doesn't matter. He won't even look at the 20 people coming through the door. Cause he just is in a present moment, you can be reading a book and then something will happen. You'll go to get up. He's like, no back here, we're in the book. Right.

So

Speaker 1 (16m 48s): Beautiful gift. That is to have a tall that is teaching you on a level. You know what I mean? That's incredible. Like I know like most people when they think of down syndrome and they think, oh, it must be so tough, which it is tough. You know what I mean? Like Dance syndrome would be, I don't know how you do it. It's very incredible. But yeah. But yeah. I mean, there's so many things that Willie can teach us and has Kent does teach us.

It's just so cool. Like it's almost like for every quality that you will perceive to be like bad or negative, there's the opposite that he's got. That's teaching you. They're made a love. That kid gives us incredible. You know what I mean? Like he's come and give you a big hug straight away.

Speaker 2 (17m 38s): Yeah. He's his nickname is Willie. Willie. The love bug Said when he, when he gave me, he gets frustrated because obviously he's got brothers and they didn't really listen. They say it's too hard. And cause Willie doesn't communicate the same way all the time. Yep. Or they could just be something going on between him and Tyler. I just, I just stopped. So if I get frustrated, guess what? Just encourages more frustration. It doesn't matter who it's from. If I go to Willie, Willie, stop and give me, or give me a, give me all your angry and you take all my love. He's like, oh, mommy looks just folds into it straight away.

So even with my other son, Tyler, like he's with me all the time. Right. And then I even said something to him, like I just need a break. And he said, you know what? He said to me, you should be thankful that I love you as much as I do. And I like spending time with you because most kids don't actually a, their parents. And I'm like, that's actually not, they don't like their parents, but they probably don't like how they know you have to go and do that. So, and I think I got that opportunity.

You know, I've had to make different sacrifices in my life because I wanted to teach my kids, not have them taught if that makes sense. So I wanted to teach them about how life is and what gratitude is and what being present is and what love is and what kindness is and what you do with other people. And that it doesn't matter what people look like. You always got them say hello. And you know, rather than being in a state of judgment, cause that's where we normally live in it. It shapes even in school like here and what kids say to my kids on the basketball court or to other kids is just, and they're like nine and 10, these kids and the words that come out based on whatever they go on YouTube or whatever else they get to watch is crazy stuff.

But I think probably the biggest thing is sometimes we also think that, cause I, I have gone through a lot of emotional ups and downs in my life, like a lot, like do you get to the top of the world? You fall down, you do that. And I'm not saying just in boxing, but something happens. You're in a relationship. It's beautiful. It's amazing. Then it turns to shit. And then all of a sudden you fall down and you know, it doesn't matter who it's with. So it could be someone that's like pushed so many buttons and kind of made you believe that you are nothing but a piece of crap. You could be working for someone working really hard and they could have no appreciation.

This is a big thing. If you are running a business and you are employing people play, stop treating them like shit, treat them like amazing people. Cause they foundation, someone comes to my house to claim my house. They can't, they can't come into my house unless I have, if I'm making coffee, they'll have a coffee or a tea or whatever they want to drink. They'll have lunch with us that half the time. If I've got a cleaning company to say, oh no, no, no, I won't eat, but they'll come and clean my house before I was in rice off to school to pick the kids up, eating an apple. So I kind of say, you're a part of my foundation. So if you are an employer and you're listening to this, start treating your people properly, do you know what I mean?

If it means giving them an extra couple of dollars an hour in their pay packet, if it means just buying them a coffee once a week or turned up with muffins or something or something, you know, where they feel good and they feel like they're appreciated. This is a big thing. There's still so many employees out there that under appreciate the people that worked their ass off. And for those that are in those spaces where you're under appreciated, sometimes it's nice to take a step back and go, what else is possible for me? And if you don't stay in the question, right? This is another big thing that happens is we go, fuck, I'm useless.

I'm not worthy. Or this has happened to me. And I'm just broken rather than, Hey universe, tell me what else is possible. What else could I do today? What, what could come into my world today? Don't look for the answer. I let the universe bring you something. But the minute you start asking a question rather than coming from a space of the decision's already made. I am filled with anxiety. I'm filled with depression. I've had so much trauma. When we stay in that we literally stay in there. If you could ask the question, what else is possible to bring me joy?

What else is possible to show me love? But love is also to me, instructor implant,

Speaker 1 (21m 34s): But

Speaker 2 (21m 34s): Just ask them about what else, what could I do today? And if I'm in a really bad space in a really bad job and I'm not happy and I'm underpaid and I'm working my ass off and no one cares, what's possible. Something need to come up. Hey universe, what else is out there? Right? And when you ask the question and guess what the energy vibration of that will start looking for, what else is possible. And then something else will show up. Do you know what I mean? And people might go, well, I've done that before. Yeah, he may have, but just keep doing it, stay living in the question. When we already concrete something as real and done wake Honda stock, it's like you're stuck in concrete or mud.

So, and the only way to get out of it is by going back to the question, what would it take for me to feel more joy every day? Not what would it take for me to get rid of this horrible boss and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. What would it take for me to find a fun place to work in? That pays me when I'm with right question, question, question, question. Even if you brought them out, one of the things I do when I'm coaching people is, or two of the things I'll give you, two, one is I get them to write left-handed right? Because guess what? My, or if you're left-handed, I'd get you to write right-handed and I'll tell you why.

If I can, when we write with the opposite hand, whatever it is that we're writing and it will just be, you know, it could be your question. What, what else could I do to what else could happen right now to bring me joy? You write that in the opposite hand, 20 times, guess where you are

Speaker 1 (22m 58s): Present, present,

Speaker 2 (22m 60s): Because you're trying to write. So you're thinking about every word. So every part of those words or those questions that's okay.

Speaker 1 (23m 5s): A good little tip. You probably looked the same as more riding right-hand on that messy didn't it looked any different, but,

Speaker 2 (23m 12s): But it doesn't matter. But even sometimes we think affirmations, affirmations, affirmations. However, when it comes to an affirmation, if your subconscious doesn't already believe you are that it takes a lot of, a lot of work to try and get it to believe it. Especially if you aren't a millionaire and you want to be, or you aren't a size six and you want to be, or you don't have the perfect girlfriend or boyfriend, but you want them, do you know what I mean? So we've been writing things out that are more in the question is powerful, really powerful. The other thing I do is, is I think it's thinking in a man as a man thinketh, but it's the page called serenity and the chapter called surrender.

I think it's chapter nine or chapter 11. And you write that out and write that out. Left-handed it's literally, it's like four or five paragraphs and people can kind of ride something out. Left-handed support from parents can take me half an hour. It will, but guess what? The more you ride it now I've gone and written it for 30 days straight. And the more I've written it, a different word will speak to me every time I write it.

Speaker 1 (24m 10s): So can you give us like a baseline of what it says?

Speaker 2 (24m 12s): So surrender is about how a calm man or woman can achieve and be everywhere and anywhere and be able to function and run business well and be understood. And people will take notice somebody who lives in frustration and give fear all of those without being calm. It doesn't work. So while you're riding around and serenity, all these words are going into your subconscious and into you energetically because you're feeling through the words as you're writing them, but you can't just write up one.

So write one paragraph. Right? And so it's, and another thing I used to do is if I didn't, if we didn't write it, when I first started, it was, I would read one line and they'd have somebody on the phone or somebody in the room and they'd read the second line, I'd read the third, they'd read the fourth. We didn't change because I've already read the first and the third after five days, we did that as well. For 30 days, we just stuck with the words that we had. So you're constantly doing repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat, which is what they do to stick everything into our mind. Anyway, whether it's from the news, from parenting, from school

Speaker 1 (25m 19s): Remade, very popular through thinking, go rich orders. Auto suggests no auto what a suggestion. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, the more you think, say something over and over the sways, like affirmations. But like I said, if you don't believe it to start with, and one of the best tricks that I've learned for believing it is say it with meaning a lot of people do affirmations, but I just go through the motions. Right. Whereas if you like, like start, they call like an incantation is probably a better word. Cause you really get into the feeling of saying it and actually force yourself to believe it.

You know what I mean? So yeah. Affirmations, if will still work over a long, long period of time, but you can cut that right down just from how much feeling that you give it while you wait, actually say it.

Speaker 2 (26m 5s): Yeah, absolutely. And I think another thing that's probably really a really valid point. If you ask somewhere or you've done something, you know, I, I deal with this with parenting all the time. I may respond, not perfect, but instead of going, oh God, I just, some of the wrong thing and I run off and I stay angry and whatever, I just stopped. And I look and I go, oh my gosh, I didn't do that real well. I didn't handle that real well, buddy. This is probably how mommy could have handled it. If she was thinking a bit clearer and she was, and she was present rather than thinking about what she's going to get done in 10 minutes time or who we've got to go and meet, or who's waiting at the gym or whatever it may be, because we'll always come into frustration when we've got to be or do something.

Right. And then something, a little hiccup will happen. Right? So one of the first things I do is I just go and apologize whether it's, you know, it's usually we, we seem to say things and do things to our kids, right? Or to the people that we love because that's going to be okay. When my kids, you know, my boys have got something new that they're starting or they go into a new team or whatever it is. I already know that that first morning, like that first half of the day is going to be them going through their own anxiety, their own stress and their own now architecture and go you and all that do that.

That's just not appropriate and tell them all for putting them in a corner or whatever. Rather I choose my choice becomes, Hey buddy, I know you're probably going through some stress boys. You probably all gone through some stress right now. And you probably also gone through some self doubt. What if you turned up and your team was just amazing and you had fun and no one cared about size or shape or the way you spoke or how your hair looks. What if, because kids have so much pressure put on them all the time.

So I'm kind of, I guess I would say I'm a parent where if my children's swear, I'm not jumping on them. Like, oh, you can't do that because you got to get to adulthood and guess what? And you probably have to swear, swear quite a bit or you're going to drink or you're gonna do whatever. Right. But I feel like there's a lot of times where we don't allow our kids to feel these emotions and understand they get angry and bang a hole in a wall. Right. Then they get in trouble straight away. They haven't worked out how to deal with that anger again. So it just gets bottled up. Okay.

That's going to be interesting to get so adapt, but tell me what's, what's actually going on with you right now. Yeah. Or you could, we have, you know, can I hug you right now? You know, trust me, my boys get into some great arguments, but it comes to a point of, okay, neither of us handled that really well. This is probably what I could have done better as a mum to listen. So you can learn, you know, I have people say to me, you needed to, I'm like, my boys are not bad boys. No kids are bad kids. And I just actually seen something in another room.

And I walked in here about kids are born bad. It's not about being bad. It's about, we're so used to shutting people down from having an emotion is that Brett spoke. I just seen a massive thing. And I'm like, oh my God, I, I love, I just love saying that. I was like, because they're not, but we don't allow them to regulate emotion. Most of the time they'll get medicated for emotion. Cause they don't know how to regulate it. They didn't have to deal with it. So the first few years I would say to my kids, if yours, if something's got you so angry, cause it's a distractor implant.

It's an emotion. If something's got you so angry, go and punch the big Teddy bear or go. We had a massive, massive Teddy bear go and punch that out, go and punch your pillow, go and slip the pillow on the bed as many times as you can. Right. Or just, or come and hug me and let me take it all. And you take all my love, right? So it's like they get to, I'm allowed to be angry. There's always going to be a consequence attached to it. Choice creates awareness. If you choose to be angry and fly off at someone something's going to happen, but then they're gonna learn how to deal with that and how to repair whatever's being done rather than getting in trouble, gets into the room, get told to shut up and no one's listened to them.

They're they're trying to cry out for something and everyone's too busy. And then we come into adult and it's like, I've got a beautiful friend living with me now and she's in her seventies and she's a school teacher and she's just amazing. And I said to her, like at what age did you actually get to look in the mirror and be able to tell yourself how much you love yourself and that you believe in yourself? And she, you know, she said to me, Well, I don't think I'm there yet.

Now let me ask all the listeners out there. How many of you have actually been able to look in a mirror and truly say to yourself, I love you and attach your name to it. I've done this with so many people on zoom. They can't even look, there could be 20 people on the screen. They can't even look at the screen. They look straight down. We're not taught to love ourselves. Right? And then we judge we're in a space of judgment that if someone's angry or swearing or yelling or frustrated, instead of understanding that person's got an emotion, we attach, well, they obviously don't love each other. And they don't love themselves because that's how they behave rather than this is them learning how to use a mechanism of an emotion right now.

I'll tell you. So I'm I don't know. I think I turned 50 recently last year maybe. But I was, I was literally, I was 47, 47 years old when I looked in the mirror and decided I actually love myself. I don't give a fuck about anything else anymore. I care about me. Right. But we're trying to, we've always got to look after and care about other people and worry about other people rather than ourselves. So we lose sight in ourselves because everyone else is more important than what we are then everybody else. So those of you that have got kids out there or, or nieces and nephews and that kind of thing.

And usually the parents think about when you say something because you're frustrated, you're angry T kid, because they've done something. I assign it because they've done something where he's saying it because you prefer to be saying it to somebody else, but you two shot or too scared to, or too worried. But it's actually something what somebody else has done has left this emotion in you and it's coming out and your child you're giving it to your child. Another question is, is somebody did the same thing to you on the street that you didn't know? Would you actually say and do the same thing to do to your own kid? No,

Speaker 1 (32m 13s): Of course not

Speaker 2 (32m 14s): To a person, these bundles that we love so much, we find it,

Speaker 1 (32m 22s): They see the worst side of us, I suppose. And it is the people that you're supposed to love the most. So yeah, that's a,

Speaker 2 (32m 27s): What if you flipped it? What if they got to see the best side? And what if somebody had done something in Australia? Just someone said, listen, that was actually a really shitty thing to do and I've allowed whatever. You've just a say then to actually affect me. And I would like to know there are different way. You could have done that.

Speaker 1 (32m 46s): Yeah.

Speaker 2 (32m 47s): Right. We get so worried about what other people may think rather than these humans that we're raising that everything's kind of back to front measured. Just being able to say, fuck off to someone. Who's done something right in front of you. Fuck off. I don't even like you and I don't need to like you, you just, you stay there. I'll stay here and you'd walk. I can guarantee you you'd walk up and you go, oh gosh, that felt good. And funny enough, Well, sometimes the bosses have to stop and listen because if they were actually doing, being kind to their employees, right.

Rather than treating them like shit and trying to get as much out of them for as little amount of money. Right. It would be a different story. I hear stories from men all the time that were there. Also some get out of bed at four o'clock in the morning and go to work. Some people are just summit just getting home at four o'clock in the morning, they worked for this minuscule amount of money. Right. And there's no appreciation or gratitude. No, nothing. It's all. It's crazy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (33m 46s): So I just want to roll back to that. You said at 47 and you were able to say that you love yourself. Okay. Walk us through how you get to that point. And what was the tipping point and what was the catalyst that made it a go? You know what, fuck it all up. What? Yeah. Walk us through that because obviously there'll be a lot of listeners gone. I wish I could get to that point. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (34m 11s): Well, I, I did it the long way. I didn't go into question about anything back then. I did it the long way. I did lots and lots of affirmations, lots not to mirror talking lots and lots of left-handed writing. And even in my left handed writing, it was affirmations. I did the serenity and then I think I pre programmed. I judged myself so much and I compare myself to everybody else. Right. And now social media is probably one of the toughest things because we, everyone's only going to show you the good shit, but don't go to my social media plays.

Don't cause I'm awake and I share some stuff and I've definitely lost friends and family over it, but you know, we all win, But it's like, I, my, I can only share and show what I, what I see, but I'm definitely not the girl that's going to get up and put on 10 ton of makeup and blow dry my hair and make sure I'm in the right lighting and do everything else. Like I didn't even turn up here like that. I'm just me. I don't, I don't need to be, pretend to be someone better. Right. And I'm not, I'm not saying that if you are an influencer that you, that you shouldn't do that you do whatever feels lot for you.

Right. But we've kind of got to a point of, we're constantly programmed. We're constantly programmed about what is acceptable. What's not acceptable. What's pretty, what's not pretty, what's attractive. All of those things for me, I literally went to work on me, completely stopped drinking alcohol. I was writing lots and lots of, lots of words. I was, I was listening to a lot of Joe Dispenza. That was really good for me at the time. And also Esther and Abraham Hicks.

I was listening to a lot of that

Speaker 1 (35m 49s): As well again.

Speaker 2 (35m 50s): And it's yeah. And kind of lately I've been listened to a lot of Gary Douglas and they, they he's even got a book with it. Would you teach a fish to climb a tree? And it's talking about kids that have got ADHD or autism or all of those.

Speaker 1 (36m 7s): I think it's really cool. What you said about the programming. And I just want people to know, like, if you aren't proactive and like consciously programming yourself, you're going to get programmed either way. So you might as well program it to what you want it to be or what you're heavy. You wanted to think. Cause it's one of them things where you're getting programmed, no matter let's have you close your eyes and ears and sleep your whole life, you're going to get programs. It, it might take it a little bit more effort to start with, but the rewards are vastly outweigh.

Cause everything's trying to program usually like, you know, all marketing and advertising its primary role is to make you feel not enough. So you buy that product, which is supposed to make you feel enough. Like it's a goal, let's say one goal, right? So let's say one goal. And all we do is get bombarded by. That was social. You know? I mean like we're up against the odds. It's like, we are like, you know, All the time there's TV, there's radio, there's, you know, your phone, social media, whatever. We're always up against things or entities, whatever, trying to make us feel, not enough.

So to combat that you need to program it with just as much time or with the higher intensity, because that's how you can program faster to then be able to program your mind. So just do a quick take. Now, how long do you spend on social media? How long do you spend watching TV and put down the hours and you need to do that amount now or more to the new, that amount to neutralize it and then more to then program it, how you like it. And that is a PSK figure. So the best way is to minimize the exposure to that, which like you said, on the same one, I watch TV.

Even my social media, I will try and only follow people that are putting up inspirational or motivational or mindset kind of staffs. And my feed. Isn't this person winning, you know, normally give people like a three strike rule. If they have three very, very negative blah, blah, you know, post three in a row, I'll just delete them. Like, you know, I mean, it's nothing against them, but artists can't be having that on my feet all the time because I'm working on my program, I'm aware of my program

Speaker 2 (38m 25s): And go back to our childhood, go back to our childhoods, like who was on a phone? Like kids are programmed now to pick up a phone. Like I used to take my kids to dinner and we'd give a phone. Cause it would just, kids would get fed first by the time. And that all got fed. It was just hard work to try and get you, you know, without having to chase a child out of a restaurant. And you know what I mean? So,

Speaker 1 (38m 46s): Oh no, my niece, I was visiting my nieces probably 12 months ago, a bit more ago. And she was able to get my phone with it, locked somehow got into it. So then the alarm went off and when the alarm went off, it went off to I'm 60. And I know, and I was walking to a shopping center and it started going off and I felt like the biggest idiot. I was like, she managed to do that

Speaker 2 (39m 10s): Amazing phase. Another thing, this is probably another thing I'd take away from my children that they're here to teach us. We've already as an adult, they've already been here over and over and over. That's what I, that's what I see. And that they've been everything and everything, regardless of color, regardless of race, regardless of sex, regardless of whether, you know, we've been kind, everyone, regardless with we've had people we've been everything in anything. Right? That's what I see now I look at my kids and think, what can I learn from you rather than what can I instill?

That's being like, I look back to my great grandparents and imagine what did all those men go through? What trauma did they go through? When they went and led talk, they went left. They just had to work, go to school. These kids would walk five miles to get to school, go to school, be programmed five miles back, then go and start doing work around the house or whatever it may be. Right. But what I look at is my kids are here to teach me. So if I've got to do something, they're like, no, no, no I'm doing it this way.

Instead of me going, I know this is the way we've always done it. I'm like, let's do that. Let's try it this way. It's amazing what your kids can teach you. I ask my kids all the time. What else do you know, tell me what else do you know? Just keep asking the question. Tell me, tell me what's going on in your day. And they'll start talking and say, what else do you know? What else do you know what? Just keep asking the question. You'll be blown away by what comes to. And it not just my kids, any kids. I held a conversation at a basketball training session with an 11 year old boy whose parents tell him I've never ever met him in my life.

His parents telling me he talks too much. He engaged me in complete conversation. He was asking me questions. He was being responsive. He was answering my questions, asking me a question at the end of his, when he finished talking, he'd asked me another question. I'm like, these parents have got no idea. They've got an incredible communicator here. Who's probably going to make an incredible leader because he knows how to get the best out of people. He doesn't even, he doesn't know. I've just told it to talk too much. So now people that talk too much, don't ask questions. But this kid asked me all about my history was telling me about his basketball. Tell me about his school, telling me, just blew me away.

And he was like 11 or nine. He was, he was young. So for me, it's like, what can, what can we be taught by our kids? And I was going to come to another point, but it's gone to it. Doesn't it doesn't matter. I think as parents it's easy for us to go, well, this is, oh no, that's Anthony is going to love this. So anyone that knows me knows Anthony and I are like best mates. We've he was my nanny for a long time, which was amazing or my in-home educator. And even when he finished working for us, he was just like, so used to being in that environment, it just was simple for him to stay.

He does his own thing. He goes and he works and he goes and takes photos. We're not in a relationship. However, we're best mates right now. He bought this thing called a toddy, right? So this is about, he's a coffee fanatic, right? And the toddy is cold, cold brewed coffee. So you've got to do a certain thing to the coffee, with water and let's see it and then put more and then add more water and then do this. And it's going to be a third of this and a cup of that and this, and then you let it sit for 12 to 24 hours.

Right? And then you can have your drink somewhere between, so you've got to kind of make it in advance. Anyway, it takes a lot of the business out. It's a very smooth coffee and it's a lot gentler on, obviously on the gut. I would imagine. Anyway, he said to me, and this is when I hear this. I'm like, I'm going to buck the system real bad here. Oh. Cause he said to me, I asked him a question. Could you make this in the Tati? Could you do it this way? And he said, they've been making this coffee like this for 67 years or since 19.

Oh, it was a long time. Right? 1967. Maybe it's been a long time. And he said, you think that would have perfected the out oven. So he does it to the T of what the instructions say. And I said to him, do you still take photos? Not do so do photography and edit photos the same way you would have from 1967. I guess we're talking about coffee. I said, we're talking about anything. Right? So then I ended up cause I'm always like trying to do more. So it's done. So I've done four instead of the one cup of coffee that you got to blend up, I've done four.

And I thought I'll do some in there. I've got some there for the next. So when it's emptied, I can refill it if they fill it and I don't have to keep blending up the coffee beans. Cause you only let it blend it for 12 seconds. All right. Anyway, I've gone. It's meant to be a third of one cup and then you do this, put water, put third, one cup, and then you put three more cups of water and you let it sit for five minutes and then you put the rest of another, the rest of it in and then put another three cups of water and then that's it. You leave it. So I've started doing it because I'm doing things with the kids at the same time. I'm not, oh shit. I had four cups of coffee in there, not one. And I've just done a third of what was actually in the thing, because it was, I would follow his instruction and I was like, let's just see what happens.

Let's just make it anyway. And at the end of, after the process was done, I gave him a taste. Do I had his coffee the next morning? He has like on oatmeal, just cold. And then I said, I was probably a bit stronger. So maybe weaken it down a little bit, but just a third of the coffee in and add more milk. And he said, yeah, tastes, tastes amazing. And then I go Anthony and taste. He goes, yeah, it tastes. I said, I was, this tastes normal for you. And he goes, what'd you do? I said nothing. And he ties, it goes and tastes really good. And I was like, ha, I didn't say anything.

Right. But I mucked around with the process. And that just took me too. And when I did say to him, by the way you 69, 67 or 67 years or whatever, it may be, the coffee can just come up from anywhere because that's what I did. I actually stuffed it up. So I think it's a big thing too, for us to let go of it doesn't matter what our parents used to do or our grandparents used to do well, but you're having to listen to your kids or younger people and learn from them rather than think. We've always gotta be the teachers. Sometimes we were, he'd be taught.

Speaker 1 (45m 4s): Yeah. That's, that's very, there's, there's one about the roast that you heard them on a bit, the roast and they used to cut. They used to cut the bone or something off all the time, like, oh, what'd you used to at all because my mom used to do it. And it was only because I wasn't big enough back then

Speaker 2 (45m 19s): That chop both ends off of the meat and put it in. And the question got asked, it was, I don't know, mum did it. And then when they asked the mum, she was like, oh, that's what my mum used to do. And it's yeah.

Speaker 1 (45m 30s): Yeah. So question, question, everything don't blind. And there was another good study where, or study or experiment where that come in and that was sitting in a waiting room, right? So one person come in and then like every time someone come in and the person would stand up and then sit back down. So then people come in and everyone would like stand up and then sit back down. And then, and they kept going around. And by the end of it, none of them actually knew why they were standing at that just because the first, before them did it. And it was just an experiment to see, would you fall along with, it was so stupid. Why stand up when someone else walks in the room, but we're just so programmed, we're very herd mentality.

So we w we don't want to be an outcast. And so that was first of all right, we had to fit in with their community. We had to fit in with our tribe for survival. So that's part of who we are, but today we don't really need to, to survive. Like, do I need to fit in those, you know, 7 billion people and they will go, we can find our own kind. We don't have to like, stick to our own little community. So yeah, that herd mentality can work in our favor. Or, you know, like say, if you hang around with people that are more successful or you then get them traits, cause that, you know, use that herd mentality as a, as an advancement as a, to better yourself instead of to use it in a negative.

So, you know, instead of hanging out with people that drinking all the time, we're going out, or whatever, the negative habit or negative attributes that you have, don't hang out with them to top of people because, you know, I mean the same as anything, you can use it for negative, or you can use it for positive. So you use that herd mentality that's already installed into us for survival to your benefit.

Speaker 2 (47m 8s): Yeah. And another thing I wanna touch on, cause she said, don't go out and do these second to do that. If you do go and do something, stop beating yourself up over it. Just go. Oh, well, well my favorite two words, two words is, oh, well, oh, well, Joan, I mean, it doesn't matter. I didn't have the dinner on the table the second time. Oh, well we were busy doing something else. Oh, well, don't worry about it. Oh wait, this isn't Donald. That's not done. Or you, you have to go and do this hour. Doesn't feel a lot for me, so, oh, well, do you know what I mean? We leave a lot of way. We let everybody else's expectations of us rule how we subs, how we function, let it guard just said, oh, well, that does not feel like for me right now, choose something different.

What can you choose in the next 10 seconds? But being, I would just stop and go in this 10 seconds. You know, maybe yesterday, I would've thought I won't bring my kids right before it was time to leave. I was like, at least in second year, I'll just bring them. I know it'll work out. However it's amended pan out will pan out. Everything will be fine. You know what I mean? So some kids have gone with mom and dad gone shopping and some have come with me or don't have stacks. So it's not like we've got a footy team, but I'm not

Speaker 1 (48m 15s): Okay. I love the fact that we've dived straight into this type. Cause this is the way that we generally talk me. And we were very passionate about mental health and you know, psychology and wellbeing and all things, you know that nature. But I still want to go back and touch on Sharon, who is Sharon? Tell me about Sharon growing up. Tell me a little bit about, so then people know now about you and who you are, what you've been through, what you've done and stuff like that.

Speaker 2 (48m 45s): Yeah. Okay. So I've got, I grew up with three brothers. Denny will go up from 10. I'm the youngest in Denny, then Brian and Richard. They're all incredible Maine. Do we always see Ottawa? Absolutely not. Doesn't matter. Oh, well everyone's different. And it's, it's, I'm just gonna say quickly as well. Sometimes you may be regarded as the black shape, be five out of four of us. I think all four of us think we are the black sheep of the family. There is no black sheep. Everyone is different. And he learned that you don't have to love it, lock it a gray with it.

It doesn't matter. But I grew up with three brothers and I learned, fought pretty quickly because you know, siblings argue, they fought, they, I want this. Now I want that. I want to do this. Now. I want that. I've done karate from, I remember standing at the back of a karate class when I was probably five and in a skirt and shit looking all pretty for school. And I was trying to kick and punch and everything else. And that kind of started that journey.

I believed I was born in Jalong in Victoria. I was, I spent a lot of my time around the Tri-Valley. So I was what we call them a week ago. So that would brand it up. Well, that would brand you as a moccasin wearing them on and have moccasins. Do you know what I mean? Or the Flonase shit. Everyone was Flint eye shades. Now it's like a statement.

Speaker 1 (50m 8s): So would I be correct in saying like Bogan would be okay,

Speaker 2 (50m 11s): But every small a bargain, it doesn't matter. What they supposed to be bargain town. Do you know what I mean? My mom, it's really funny. Cause I did this in one of the NLP programs I've done. I've done. Trust me. I've done. I've done NLP and hypnotherapy. I've learned everything like everything. Okay. All the unfuck myself, literally. I'm fucked with my brain when I took over the point of no, I run my brain, my brain doesn't run me anymore. I run my brain that fucking transformed everything. And I'll say, look, I'm that convicted that I just realize, now I can control whatever thoughts go and all I can say, that's bullshit and actually go, oh, I'm going to choose this though.

Like what do I choose in this 10 seconds? But

Speaker 1 (50m 54s): Oh yeah, I'm pretty sure like you would from Joe Dispenza. So by the time you're 35, 90 5% of your thoughts are repetitive. And the same thing every day on autopilot, we have between 60 and 70,000 thoughts a day. So 95% of that, you know what I mean? Do the math. So you're having like 60 or 60,000 of the same thoughts over and over, which is just reinforcing that same program over and over again. So,

Speaker 2 (51m 21s): And I'm going to ask you a question and most of those thought chores, they belong to someone else. Well, pretty much not.

Speaker 1 (51m 31s): Are we going to go into the Mr. Claire?

Speaker 2 (51m 34s): We might lose some people, but realistically, because everything you see around, we see around us and everything, that way when we are at school or playing sports or growing up, ran out, you know, and in our homes, all of the things that you hear become a part of your thought, I can't afford that. I can't do that. I'm not good enough. I'm too fat. I'm too skinny. I'm too slow. I'm not smart enough. So many of those things that may have been programmed from school or home, or, you know, just watching a movie, I th well go back to, so I did this in one of the many, many, I've spent over $250,000 in personal development.

My whole lifetime, like I've, I've gone pretty hard. Cause I just wanted to, I just wanted to be great and I wanted to help people and I wanted to make a difference. Like I just, I actually fucking love everyone. I literally, I can just walk up to a complete stranger and wrap my arms around them and just hold them and just say, I love you and just walk away. Right. And I don't know how many people can say that because a lot of people can't love themselves enough to be able to go and love somebody else that I don't know, we go straight into judgment, but it's an incredible thing. So here's some, Hey, something else it's really incredible.

You can try. If you think you're having a shitty day, go up to one of the ladies or the men that claim the shopping centers or the sporting areas, or that have got to clean up everybody's toilet mess and everything else in the shops and go and just say to them, thank you, thank you for just making this place. So clean that we've got, we feel good when we come here because that will blow you away. I would go and buy flowers and find one that just looks like they're broken and just give them flowers. And it's amazing when I'm with Willie, cause he's the love bug.

He just stops. And he just grabs someone. He just starts cuddling them. And it's just amazing. And they're like, oh my God, I just needed that. A lot of them are more older ladies emit. Right? And he just, and one could be rude. Like what are you doing? And all of a sudden, they just fall into a cuddle with him and it's like, wow, most of these people don't even get hugged. Right. So if you are in a family, start hugging each other more. It's amazing. Hug your friends, hug anyone. Some people might go, oh no, their energy and your energy and something might happen. And if it feels locked on, hug them, literally it feels heavy, dark. It feels like hug them.

But I did this thing where you had to go out and kind of look, my mom has been the strongest women, woman I've ever known. Right? Like just an amazing woman, what she's gone through in all of her life. And I, we kind of judge who we love the most first. So you had to do right. Who do you think is holding you back based on what they do and who do you look up to the most that you'd want to be like? So I had Oprah Winfrey and my mum and I don't know why I thought at the time my mum was holding me back maybe because I thought she getting softer. Cause she's getting older.

I know she literally just didn't give a fuck anymore because the older you get, the more you realize it's all bullshit anyway. Right. But so, and you had to stack. So I had to write all these words that made me think of my mum all the way to the top about, you know, what her journey is, what she's here for all of that stuff. Right. And hers was, my mum was always to her role in life has always been to be the best mother and grandmother. She could be to make sure all her kids were always fed close, loved someone was always at home for them.

Amazing. And then when I did Oprah Winfrey and stacked hers, she wanted to be the, exactly the same as my mom just wanted to impact a lot more people. My mom didn't, my mom was already impacting other people anyway, but her, her mission was let me get my kids into a beautiful space. Right. And I've seen realize that it doesn't matter who we look at. If we take away judgment, most people are here to do incredible things or to leave a legacy of some sort. And that legacy starts with just been a beautiful kind, loving parent.

That's huge or a beautiful kind loving partner. Do you know what I mean? That's that's massive. So yeah, I think we were sport a lot by my mum with lots of incredible home cooked meals and stuff like that. I started training at such a young age and I just progressed from, I went from karate into kickboxing, into like touch contact, cucumber, kickboxing into full contact, kickboxing into meets high. And I, I didn't progress. Cause I thought I can go and jump to this. Now I just ran out of people to compete against. And I was like, oh shit, that doesn't work.

So in karate, I ended up, you know, if I went in and signed up 30 other women would take the name off the list and they would come out. So I was like, well then I'll go into the men's black belt division because I was a black belt. Yeah. By now I'm probably 18, 17, 18. And I'd been competing since I was like five. So I would go into the men's and then I was like, now it's going to be me. And it was always me and two of my brothers fought enough for first, second and third place in the moment with this. And I found a fight with him at home every day. What's next? Like, what else can I do? And that's when touch, contact kickboxing come to Australia.

My dad was a pilot bringing that in. So I did that. That was the nice, big, bright yellow foot pads and everything that

Speaker 1 (56m 27s): Touches contact.

Speaker 2 (56m 29s): So it's more of the white coat stalled, kickboxing. So it's like, it's fast and you don't hit as hard. It's more points I bumped. The more times you can kick someone rather than trying to knock them out. So it was all very much point scoring. Whereas full contact key box saying is we want to take out the leg. We want to break a rib or actually drop on

Speaker 1 (56m 46s): There.

Speaker 2 (56m 48s): And then there was mood tie, which means you can elbow, you can knee and elbow them as well. So that was fun. Yeah. I think I just kind of, and then I, when I was meant to go to Japan and compete for a world title in Muay Thai, I'd had to send a fight tape over with previous fights and the girl pulled out and we had a whole gym full of people because Joe Bogner w the heavyweight champion books said he fought Muhammad Ali twice. He was fighting and said he was trying to have, add Jim, say, Hey, had we had all the press there.

He was there doing his training. We had all the press. Cause we went to fly out within the next few days and dad's got a phone call and it was the promoter saying that girls are gonna fight your girl. Dad said, well, don't worry. You said, she's retired. She's not going to her. Your Gil's too strong. And dad said, don't, don't worry. Just find someone else. He has. No, you don't understand your daughter's not welcome in our country to keep bugs or me, Ty, she's not welcome. So we'll just put this fight to sleep. And then dad's got a hole. We've got a Jimmy didn't want to tell me there's a whole gym full of channel nine, channel seven old gold coast.

And he said to Joe, look, what am I going to do? And he said, well, can you keep a fate on the floor? And he said, oh, she doesn't listen to me for anything, which trust me, parents. Oh, kids do it, but we don't always listen. But we do. We do here. And Joseph would just put her on my show. She can box, just get to keep her feet on the floor. She can already hit hard, hit. Well, just, and that was kind of my progression into the boxing world. And that's kind of how that took off. And then I ended up and I, I sit from the age of 30.

Speaker 1 (58m 17s): Well, we've got pretty similar experience in boxing way. A couple of fights to your what? How many, 200 rules not going to happen?

Speaker 2 (58m 27s): Let me tell them, let me tell you what, it's a story. Cause we liked, we liked talking in GIF a lot on, on messenger. Don't we, we like to send them pictures and we're like, I know we're just laughing a lot. But I remember when Ron was at my place and he was showing the kids how to kind of back flip and the rocks were kind of over here. And the pool was kind of like that far away. I don't know where the cameras would like that far away maybe would be further. And I said to him, Ryan, like, and I'm looking at him, I'm thinking I'm gonna go. That it's getting further and further away.

And it was him doing it. And you know what he said to me and it was so powerful. He said, don't, you dare fucking tell me I can't do something. I already know. I can. Cause you're going to make me doubt myself. And then there's going to be an accident. I was like, absolutely. And that was the biggest wake up call for me that even if my kids think I can do this, if I go, no, no, I'm putting the fear into him. Right? And we were always putting the fear, the lights to be left on this needs to be done. This needs to be done. Willy is my example of why we moved born. We're born with two fears, loud noises and being dropped.

That's it? Cause Willie can go into a dark room and sit there and be completely contained. All the boys look , he doesn't care about the party can look for him. It's just, it's unbelievable. What, what can happen from perception of what we think? So I didn't even know what I was talking about. So that's something that's tentative.

Speaker 1 (59m 51s): Oh, for the butterflies anyway, back to you fought increase to that. Yes. To them. But you went to boxing then? Yeah. So when was your first boxing fight?

Speaker 2 (1h 0m 4s): Seriously going to ask for dates and stuff?

Speaker 1 (1h 0m 7s): I

Speaker 2 (1h 0m 8s): Had, I think I was about 27. So anyone that's told that you can only be successful in sport. When you're young, I became a world champion at the age of 35. I fell pregnant the age of 87 or defended my world title now. And it wasn't just any world. Actually. I probably won a world title a bit earlier than that, but the WBC, which is like the big green belt, Muhammad Ali, Lennox, Lewis, you know, cost the zoo. All of those fought for the big green belt. That was like, I remember having an argument with my dad would not run you back really quickly. Cause that's what I remember.

And he's telling me, I've got to do my homework and I'm like, God, I need to, I don't need to do, or I don't need Pythagoras theorem. I don't need to understand that because it's, to me, it just made no sense. I just said to him, I don't need this to count money. Cause that's kind of what we do with math. Like how many people have gone, done all these study on medicine? You know, unless you're an engineer or something or you're creating an architecture, how many people have gone to Gisele those figures and understand that? And I can guarantee you that probably so use a calculator and a ruler. So will Elva numbers match up and your dad says, well, what on earth are you going to be when you grow up there? And if you don't do your schoolwork and I was like, well, I just want to be the best in the world.

And he said at what? And I said, oh, I don't know. But I think my fists are going to get me there. And I just remember looking at him going, Hmm, maybe they will. And that was at Janey of thought, I'd become the best in the world in karate. Then I'll become the best in the world at kickboxing. Then I moved to boxing. So for me it was always about just being the best. And I think it was also the biggest message I wanted to give out was to so many women and girls out there that were not all ballerinas Manji. They did put ballerina wallpaper on my bedroom when I was young.

Maybe that's what fucked me up. Cause I was like, man, why don't my brothers? If you, if you feel like you were a tomboy, it is normal. Like, and I'm not gonna, I'm not here to offend or upset anybody. They feel they need to have something different in their body. But when you're young and you're a girl and you've got brothers, you just want to be like your brothers and your dad is normally closest contact. So you kind of want to be like him. So most girls are tomboys until we kind of get to about 17, 18. And then we probably take on our bodies a bit more and realize we, we love being women and we love makeup and we love all the other things.

So if anyone has been confused about gender, you know, identity and all that kind of thing, it is normal to want to kick a ball, chase your brothers, play cricket, all that kind of thing. It doesn't mean that you need to change who you are. So if that can help in any way with him on that might be struggling with that because there's so much of that out there right now, if you have made some changes, that's, you know, if it feels like for you, amazing, you know, I'm just saying, we all go through stages as we grow up that we're kind of ignoring a lot in the, in this like what's going on in the media and in schools and everything right now.

You know, even for me to get a letter from, from Medicare to say my 14 year old twins are no longer under my medical decision that they now under their own, they can make all their own choices at 14,

Speaker 1 (1h 3m 3s): But they can't drink alcohol. They can't take

Speaker 2 (1h 3m 6s): Contract the cat. Well, they can, we've told them But there's so many things you can't do, but you can make all your own decisions about what you can do medically or whether you stay in the body you're in or you do something different anyway. So, but I won't go there. That could be maybe another conversation in one day, but yeah, just, I remember I all, I just, I just want to be the best in the world. And I was already far with my brothers. Like I fought just to get to the first bit of roast pork crackle. Do you know what I mean? So they wouldn't get it. If you didn't sit down quick enough that it would be no food plate.

So, you know, I will always, regardless of where the Jenny is in my life, I'm, I'm so grateful to my brothers and I love them all so much because they helped instill in me. Like they, they beat me up. They picked on me. They, I remember all the things they used to do, that they were brothers, they were protective, they were caring. They were crazy. And I look at everything. Sometimes we can look at what has happened to us when were young and go, oh my God, because of this, I am, this is how I am now.

And I'm struggling emotionally and I can't do this and I can't do that. And I just kind of completely reversed it and thought I'm going to thank my brothers and my parents for everything they did. That was amazing. And got to thank them for everything they did. That was fucking horrible Ohad because it's all about learning and understanding and playing life as you can. But if I thanked them for everything that got done and everybody else that did have hit me in my life, I thanked them for it because if I hadn't been hurt and I hadn't gone through pain, I hadn't had to dig through some things.

What I've been able to be the best in the world as the best fighter in the world. Like would I I've had the tenacity to just stay in there and keep going, no matter how much it hit the partners I'd had, like when you go from blaming and feeling like you're a victim to thanking people for giving you a gift to know, like, I remember ringing up one boyfriend to saying, thank you so much. I know that we're not together. And I just want to say, thank you. Cause I broke it off with him. And he said, I don't know what you're talking to look. Why would you be thanking me? I say, cause you've just helped me learn so much more about myself and what I do or don't want my life.

And that is a massive gift and I'll forever, forever, forever. Be grateful for that. Do you know what I mean? Like we look at things like, oh my

Speaker 1 (1h 5m 18s): God, there, the other side that to the other thing that's really powerful is not only I flipping the script for you and healing yourself and you know, you, then you go into that forgiveness of that other person as well. And that's healing you, but I can guarantee a hundred percent. He got some healing as well from hearing that. So you kind of healing two people at once.

Speaker 2 (1h 5m 42s): So I wasn't thinking of healing,

Speaker 1 (1h 5m 44s): But that's what I'm saying. I'm saying that's another added benefit of doing it is, you know, we're doing do it for yourself because you want to be able to heal yourself, but I'm sure there's on some level, he'll have some guilt around whatever. And just hearing that from you would have been gone, but it would have helped him on his journey on his and his life as well.

Speaker 2 (1h 6m 4s): I think it's really important because as you know, my brothers talk about other girls of their friends and girlfriends and stuff and the things I do inside and I'm like, w we make girls, but we made 15, 16, 17, 18, 19. We all need to be loved because we've never been loved enough. We have by a parents that we haven't looked at it that way. And then we haven't loved ourselves enough because we've been programmed so many ways. Right. And I say to them, it doesn't matter who if you get a girlfriend, unless you help give them that space of thank you for the gift of learning something.

Like, it's not, it's never going to change because as women, we are needy, we need. Cause probably because we don't love ourselves that much. I'm totally different. Now I do not care. Do you know what I mean? But when my young, we feel that we are going to driven into this pitch out of, you know, you're going to find a man, you have to fall in love. And it's a, it's a prince charming and all this bullshit. And it's not always that. Right. But it's okay. And if things aren't working out well, instead of thinking, you know, for me, even my parents have been in together all they'll look, I think my mom was 17 or 18 when she met my dad, you know?

And then now in their seventies, they've gone through a lot of shit. It wasn't like holding hands and roses and everything was amazing. They've gone through some big things, right. And I'm forever grateful. They've stayed together as much as I'd still drive each other nuts, but they love each other. Right. And they one can't sleep if the other one's not there. And, but I

Speaker 1 (1h 7m 31s): Said,

Speaker 2 (1h 7m 35s): But I, I set the trajectory of what our relationship was meant to look like based on what I seen from my parents. That's that's what may we not all, wait, we're not all that. Right. And if you, whatever happens in your relationship, go to a space of looking for what you can be grateful for, what you, what you can learn from it. And whatever's happened is that the person you really wanted to be with anyway, same thing with you work. It doesn't really matter. But sometimes as women, we get to a point of our console and some men have the same look. They want to commit suicide after a relationship breaking up because they think that's the be all and end all because of whatever they've been programmed of, what a relationship should look like.

So

Speaker 1 (1h 8m 13s): I think like when we're talking about programming and stuff and like who we are, and I think a lot of people struggle with, you know, who am I like? You know, and you say, look, we've got all this programming. And a lot of times it's thought about like, I don't know, it's great to learn and grow and get the knowledge, but sometimes just take away all the things that you are not, you know what I mean? Like

Speaker 2 (1h 8m 38s): I said,

Speaker 1 (1h 8m 39s): Cause yeah, always trying to like gain more, but sometimes less is more like, you know, start getting rid of the things that, you know, the art you and then what will we'll sequence, you'll just be left with who you are. Right. So try not to add, I can't think of the, there's a good phrase to finish that off. But anyway. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (1h 9m 5s): And that's where I probably stayed in the question and then writing more of those, those words and just having more belief of who you are because we get painted pictures by so many people, you know, even for me, when I fell pregnant with the twins, oh my gosh, it was in a tumultuous relationship. I'd already left. I'd been trained with the Titans and Billy Johnson for three, three months. And I was getting ready to have one of the biggest, I had a whole new management team around me was probably going to be the biggest like year of my life in competing.

And I'm pregnant with twins. I'm like nine weeks pregnant. Right. And I'm like, shit. And then, you know that dreaded question, well, are you sure they mark them at you? The only person I've actually slept with at all in however long, you know what I mean? It's Whatever. But it's like I had to, then re-program who I was. Cause I've been this world champion athlete and someone that just are trained. I showed up, I spoke on radios. I just wanted to empower more women and more, more girls to think outside the box and not feel like that's the Bellarine wallpaper.

Not think that just because somebody else has been this, you can be anything you want to be, it doesn't have to be within the normal of what everyone thinks it has to be. Do you know what I mean? If you're passionate about flowers, go and do something with flowers, don't worry about becoming the doctor because something else is going to light you up. Think of what feels light or heavy

Speaker 1 (1h 10m 27s): And like, yeah, I think that's, we need to change. Like obviously need to change the children, but the parents need to change first to then change the children's. That makes sense. So parenting is a big thing and I'm not a parent myself. So it's really hard for me to talk about it, but I feel like, yeah, like you're saying, you got to let your kids give them more freedom. I think we're boxing them in, boxed them with the school. The school boxes are man.

And everything about society is trying to pigeonhole them into this certain thing. And, and they're losing their individuality. They're losing Everything that, you know, w what a kid is, you let the kid do what he wants and he is free. Like, you know, everything's magical mythical. You know what I mean? Instead of, and then it's like, not on a, like coming here, like, and I feel like as parents, we need to do a lot more of, you know, let them climb the monkey bars. They forfeit her.

The who gives a fuck. I know you think you're doing the right thing by saying, no, you could hurt yourself. But then that's how our kids learn. Like, I mean, they need to be able to climb it and know that there's danger. And if they do fall, you know, what, guess what? We all fall down a life. You know, that's not the worst thing in the world. Actually. That's probably one of the better, like you said it by falling down and failing that it teaches you and you grow and you develop the mechanisms and the, the coping mechanisms to get through whatever it is that you get through. You're always leveling up. And I think a lot of kids are getting bubble wrap now.

And then, then they get into the real world. They're like, I don't know how to deal with anything. Cause my parents have just,

Speaker 2 (1h 12m 8s): And I'm going to, I'm going to share two things on that you just said, I don't have kids. So I'm probably not the great person to speak about this. You all, one of the people that taught me, like I chose you to be an uncle to my kids. Do you remember? Like, I just, there was a couple of years that we're all in a program together, but you were like one of my first choices. Cause you're free. Your you like, you, you take risks, you just do things that are fun. You're always traveling, you know, your, you just the, to me, that's what laws should be right now.

I know you've still got to work and make money and everything else. But when you can, you do all the things that you can, that gives, brings you joy. You were the main one that taught me to let it go. If they're going to backflip from something and they have any doubt or they're going to do this or have any doubt, then that's going to cause more harm than you design. You've got this, you've got this, you've got this. You know what I mean? So you taught me to let things go. I remember that were jumping from stairs onto a big mat, Like, cause you crazy. Right.

But I'm crazy too. And I'm like, I just had to stop and go. Even Willie, he really wants to do something like, well really? No, he just mom stop. I'm a big boy. I'm a big boy. And I'm like, because Willie to me emotionally is probably about five. Right? But he can Ram half his brother's Iver. If he wants to get to something, they can't hold him back. He's so strong. Right. And he just wants to be listened to and a part of the communication. And he, you know what I mean? So it's, it's a massive lesson.

So one, you are an incredible person to talk about kids because you show kids no fear. Right? And it's not no fear in a crazy thing you had, when you said to me, I've calculated the distance, the heart of the rocks, where the water is, where we're going to jump to. And I've gone all the way around your point. I've calculated everything in my mind where the safest place within to jump from is this is it. So if they're going to learn how to get out of the comfort zone and do something a bit risky, this is where we're starting. Right. And then as the day progressed, they were gone further and further and higher and higher and higher.

Yeah. So that's, that's huge. And I think it's so easy for us to be so busy on. Now I've got to get home. I've got to go to work. Now I've got to get home, do homework and they'll go get dinner cooked. And I've got to do this. And I would do that rather than may not come home. Stop and go, tell me about your day. What else do you know, tell me what else happened and why did that happen? You know, there's so many kids committing suicide because I'm not saying it's because the parents aren't listening, but it's because there's so much shit going on. So when we talk about parenting, first parents have to unfuck themselves because kids, we all learn based on, you know, I had another mum approached me and said, I'm really worried because I'm constantly beating myself up for how I look and my daughter's starting to do the same and she's seven.

Speaker 1 (1h 14m 53s): Right?

Speaker 2 (1h 14m 55s): And what do you do? That's one of the,

Speaker 1 (1h 14m 58s): For example, yeah. Kids always do what you do, not what you say, you know? And that's, I think there's a lot of misalignment, you know, your kids, your parents say, oh, you can't do this. And way more, they can't eat that cake or they eat the cake, you know, like that's not going to work. And even, even if you try and hide it for, I think at an energetic level, they will still feel like, you know, I mean, you need to be, kids are so sensitive to alignment. You know what I mean?

Speaker 2 (1h 15m 27s): They can tell

Speaker 1 (1h 15m 28s): Everything, you know? So you, you think you're outsmarting them by, you know, I don't do this or whatever, like, no, you need to be in alignment and then they will follow that.

Speaker 2 (1h 15m 37s): Absolutely. Absolutely. And he's nothing, you can always change the trajectory of your course. It doesn't matter what you're doing now. You can always go, this is what I like to do. Now. This is what I like to do. Now. This is what I like to do. Now. It doesn't always have to be the same. We feel like we're always stuck in this one spot. This one thing, this one way, this one parenting program, there's one working program. This one relationship program is one. I'm not saying go out and do the wrong thing.

Speaker 1 (1h 16m 1s): It was crazy like Zano. So I just turned 28, nah, 38 30 I the other day. And I was talking to this girl and she was 26, I think. And she was gone on about how she's so far behind in life because COVID, and it slowed her career down. And I'm like, you're 26.

Like, you know what I mean? Like I think people yell, like you said, they put so much and society's doing this. I put so much pressure on people to be in, have a certain amount of things by us. You know, I was like, you're 26, go travel, like, go do whatever. Like don't worry about that other stuff. And yeah, it was just crazy to hear, like, she was very, almost distraught about it too. Like, you know, it was like a big, you know, she was ruminated it just going on or about like, I'm just like, well, like I think people just need to lead to let go of this of you have to have, sir, it's okay to get married at 40 or whatever have kids, you know what I mean?

I know obviously women have a body clock, so they've got to kids by a certain time, but that's probably the only thing that you have to do by a certain time. You know what I mean? Everything else was it Colonel Sanders buddy created KFC when he was 67. So yeah, I don't think it's ever too late in and I'm no different. I fall into that trap. Like sometimes I think to myself, you know, 38 now I don't have any kids and my business isn't where we'd like it to be and do that comparison thing.

And I've got to catch myself and this guy not, this is my genius. This is, you know what I mean? And just sort of keep doing what I know that I love doing, you know, just keep helping people. And don't, don't worry about the success as in like, you know, I'm not successful enough and not reaching enough people, but the people that are, do help just do the best you can with them people and then just, you know, that's all you can do. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (1h 18m 15s): Yeah, absolutely. I love that. You've shared that part because I think what's really important is you've got to start to understand your, not your bank account. Right. Everyone kind of connects to, because we see all this stuff in, you know, on social media and in the, in on TV. And you know, some of the people that we've looked up to for 70 years because they've made it to the millions and whatever else, they probably not really the people that you think they are anyway.

Speaker 1 (1h 18m 39s): And there's no car, there's no correlation with happiness as to seek to money, to like they've already proven that in numerous and numerous studies and people say, oh, if I just had more money, you know, I'll be happier, but no more money. It becomes more problems becomes more, you know what I mean? It's

Speaker 2 (1h 18m 56s): Happiness being in a space of gratitude and joy and being in that space that will bring more because when you're in a lower, you know, more of a lower frequency of anything else that kind of deters, you just get more of whatever shit you're dealing with energetically. So even if you're struggling with anxiety and depression and you know, any, any of those or worse, instead of thinking, you know, I'm, I'm making this money or I'm beautiful arm, rich arm thin or whatever, just start thinking with, you know, what can I be grateful for today?

What can I be grateful for? If you've got, it could just be that the fact that you can pick up a pin and right. Cause your, or your fingers work, you know what I mean? It could be, you only have three fingers, but you can still pick up a pen. It could be, you can pick up pencils and coloring. Cause you don't know how to write, who fucking cares at the end of the day,

Speaker 1 (1h 19m 49s): You got into something that I found is really, it's a real good way to get in the present because if you're constantly grateful for every little thing that's going on, like your fingers, like if you're writing or talking like, and it's, it really helps with awareness because the hardest thing is there's a lot of time. We know we should be or thinking certain things or whatever, but we, we lacked the constant focus of that awareness and to grow that awareness, that's why meditation is so good because you're forcing yourself to come back to that present moment, to bring the awareness back, bring the awareness back.

And you want to get to a point where, you know, if you like a, a smart way that they, 24 is awareness that they can, the whole 24 hours of that day is conscious awareness. That's like, I don't expect anyone to, to get to that level, but that's what we should be striving for is less of the unconscious running the show. And more of the conscious writing the show is through presence and gratitude is one of the best ways to do that.

Speaker 2 (1h 20m 49s): And I, and I want to share something else as well, like you, and I've done a lot with when it comes to gratitude. I want to say something else as well. Like if we just, everyone that's listening to this call doesn't matter, live or record or 10 years down the track, wherever you are, even us just stop and take a really nice, big, deep breath breathing and then re down, let your shoulders relax, take another deep breath, breathing and breathing out.

I can imagine. I just felt really relaxed.

Speaker 1 (1h 21m 26s): Yeah, me too. I noticed my face, like my face went from tense to dislike it just sort of, and I thought my face was melting.

Speaker 2 (1h 21m 39s): It's really interesting. Cause when we don't slow down, cause everything's so fast now, like we're distracted by so many things. There's so much going on. There's so many things. We got to get kids to parents to whatever it is. Right? So many commitments that we make because we want to be successful. Like fuck all that. If success meant becoming really present and slowing down, taking a deep breath and I'm going to ask all those people out there that are smokers, right? It's a natural for us to be able to relax by breathing in deep and it's highly tape, right?

And most people smoke and you say, why do you smoke? It's not because they love the taste of it. Most people will say because I love the feel of all the air going into my body and coming back out. So imagine if before cigarettes got put in our hands, imagine if we learn how to do some deep breathing into meditation, right. At a younger age and you have that same feeling, but you didn't have to put anything into your body right now. There's been a lot of stuff. So I've looked into a couple of other programs, literally about things that were programmed on.

So even when we were going to talk about milk, right. Cows milk. Now whether you have it or you don't, I don't mind your choice, your life. I don't mind, but when the original slogans, right? So she went on smoking and then also on milk when the original slogan started, it was like, it would say milk good for you. Like you've got milk, good for you. But the more the slogan kept going at 10 to milk. Good for you as in milk is good for you.

Right? So we started to program people right on milk. Now I'm not going to say whether you should or shouldn't drink it. I choose other options. My kids will drink normal milk. They'll drink alternative milks. I do notice some changes in what happens with their bodies when they drink normal milk. Now also with smoking back seventy, eighty, a hundred fifty on a, how long when smoking come out, women didn't even like the smell of it. So they wouldn't want a partner that was smoking. So what they started to do to market to women was started to do those, like the ads, where it would be the woman and the taught up shit with half the cleavage, hanging out the short shirts and cigarette in their hand, like, you know, look how cool I am.

So other women will come and go. If she's being called, look how pretty she is. And I want to be pretty like her. That's how they get in this all the time. So just be mindful of, there's a lot of stuff that happens in marketing, you know, glad I don't live in America and don't watch normal TV. When I was in America. Every ad was from a pharmaceutical company on what medication you needed. If you had a runny nose or if you had a little cough or if you had,

Speaker 1 (1h 24m 18s): When your body has got the best fighting defenses against anything, you know, boys are an amazing mechanism for, you know, it can heal itself and you don't need any of that. You know, before pharmaceuticals come around a hundred years ago, people were fine. You know, they heal themselves through natural means. And you know, obviously we've come a long way when it comes to acute stuff like, you know, a broken leg and you know, absolutely cutting cancers out. Like I think the medical industry and the pharmaceutical, like I've done well there. But when it comes to stuff like health, I think they totally missed the mark and some, all about the money than, than your health.

And that's really unfortunate. Even when you go to a doctor, you know, like, oh, what's going on? Oh, he's a ACR heart medication. Oh, how about just go for a fucking run, eat some good food. You know what I mean? Like, why is there a pill when you should, you know, you're doing the wrong thing. Like,

Speaker 2 (1h 25m 10s): And if, if anyone's in that space, cause I've, I also understood that our gut is actually our first brain when our gut isn't working right. Or I got, he's not, well, our brain doesn't work properly.

Speaker 1 (1h 25m 22s): Must never be working that

Speaker 2 (1h 25m 24s): Emotionally, emotionally, you're not emotionally everything. Like when you start looking more into the stomach lining and all that, I can send you a video that we did with the naturopath. He started talking about what's going on, right under our stomach linings, all that kind of stuff. But if you got is not clean or not healthy, then your thoughts aren't going to be either because everything gets filtered. Right. So I'm not saying that those have got trauma just need to clean. Their gut was definitely make a difference about what's going on. And then starting to live more in the question of what else is possible.

If you've gone through trauma, it's been fucking horrible. And it's like ripping you apart. Imagine if you weren't strong and you, weren't an incredible gift to this world, which actually still be here. Right. And I always say, because for me, all my trauma got me to be the best of who I could be because I was strong enough to withstand it, go through it, experience it, come out the other end and still be grateful and love the people that created it.

Speaker 1 (1h 26m 25s): Would you be willing to share any of your traumas with us today?

Speaker 2 (1h 26m 29s): Oh God, there's been quite a few, but yeah.

Speaker 1 (1h 26m 33s): I only ask, cause you know, if we, you know, if there's something that you went through and there's other people listening and then I'd like to then ask you, like, what did you do to help you short that could then benefit or the other people that might be gone through have gone through similar things that you have gone through. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (1h 26m 49s): Okay. So I'll pop it in a nutshell, I've gone through a lot ripe abusive. My dad is an amazing man. My brothers are all amazing when everybody gets out in and they become different people. So there's been like when I talk about abuse, it's never, ever been sexual abuse, but there's been physical abuse, like being punched in, hit and thrown into rooms or, you know, ripped out of cars. So I've gone through a lot of shit on a lot of ways.

I won't go too deep into it because again, I just, I'm really grateful because I can tell you if I didn't, hadn't gone through all of that stuff when I was growing up. Right. I hadn't watched, you know, some of the stuff that my dad did to my mom or my mum, you know, they love each other, but they, she had happened and it was always based around alcohol.

Speaker 1 (1h 27m 43s): Right? Yeah.

Speaker 2 (1h 27m 46s): But if I hadn't gone through all that would, I've been strong enough to push my body to be the best fighter in the world. First Australian woman to ever become a world champion in the boxing ring, there were saved the first woman to ever, ever saved the green belt that every base say will title. Would I have been strong enough? I don't think so. I truly believe that whatever the trauma is that we've gone through. If we take that trauma, cause we're still here and we're going share that with others who have gone through that trauma, we then become their gift.

Right? Write a book about what you've gone through and the fact that you're still here, right. Start looking at yourself in the mirror and realize that you're a gift to the world rather than something different. Realize that you've got the strength and the tenacity to withstand anything. And again, if I know I'm sending the thoughts on hours, who the fuck do they belong to? Not us has been programmed to fuck them off. Right. I know it's easy said, but you're a gift. If you've gone through anything that has just crippled you emotionally, energetically, just if you're still here and you haven't gone and committed suicide or whatever, it may be that you've got a story to tell.

And there's other people that need your story as well.

Speaker 1 (1h 28m 58s): Yeah. I think a lot of people when they're going through things, don't they think they're the only ones. And it's funny when you get everyone to a room and you say what should be his fee? And it's funny, they all yell at the same thing. It's like, we're all so similar. And that can allow us to have a level of compassion, I suppose, for other people too, you know, like a lot of times when people acting a certain way, we, we take things say, oh, I realize I've done this a lot in the past and I'm working on it. Now we take things. So fucking personally today, like anyone does something you like, you take it on is, you know, something it's probably, they've had a bad shit day or their mum could have died.

I mean, who knows? It's really funny. And I've done that a lot in the dating world too, you know, like it's, you know, whatever is going on or whatever. And then I try to look to see what it is that I did. And nine times out of 10 it's they've just got their own shit going on. And you know what I mean? It's so, and you have to be honest

Speaker 2 (1h 29m 54s): And you have a Bain there, fix it kind of personnel, have you like, well, I'll go and stay there and try and help fix them and make them feel good. That's not our job by the way, people, if, because those of us that are very compassionate and Ryan and I are very, very, very GPS, Nepal, you know, they had to fix someone else, get them to fix their shit and come back later, trust me. If they need to be there, they will be, do you know what I mean? Like always gotta work on you. You do, I cut you off or you still going to say something else?

Cause I have a little story that I want to share.

Speaker 1 (1h 30m 27s): There you go.

Speaker 2 (1h 30m 28s): So we didn't have, we didn't have a lot of money growing up. And like my brothers and my dad went away as monsters. We would just siblings and sometimes shit went pear shaped, but it's easy. It's easy to look and go, well, if you didn't do that, that, that, that, and that I would be this person, fuck that. Thank you for doing B and D CCCs. And that to make me realize how strong I am, how amazing I am and what I don't do or don't want to be when I get older. But I was in primary school.

We didn't have a lot of money. And I had my most favorite dress in the whole wide world, even though hardly ever wore dresses. Cause I was more of a tomboy, but I had my favorite dress and I hardly wore it. Therefore it sat in the wardrobe all the time. It had this tiny little moth hole in it. I didn't know right now I had a friend at school that was having a bad day and I loved her. I thought she was amazing. I wasn't gay by the way. I just thought she was amazing. And she was my best friend. And I would hold hands with her all day. Didn't mean I wanted to become something different. Didn't even know what I was.

Right. If somebody said, would you marry her? I probably would've said yes, because it would have made sense to me that I just want to spend all my time with there. Right. Even though I'm not gay or I'm not saying you can't accompany gay. So I'm just trying to bring up more things as a kid that we might think, oh, that means I'm this one. Really? Maybe I'm just me. But it was a bad thing. And I was like, oh my gosh, I don't have the money to buy her a present. And I thought, what can I do? And it's really funny because I picked up my favorite dress that cost my mum a lot of money and I wrapped it up and I took it to school the next day.

And I give it to her. And two of the friends that was sitting with her said, oh my God, you've given her a dress with moth holes in it. How old and ugly is this dress? Now I'm like six that's fucking traumatic. Right? So when you talk about trauma, it doesn't always have to be trauma of something that's happened and you go right back and trauma starts just on how kids treat each other, which takes me to another point of, to kids really need to be in school at such a young age when they don't even know how to deal with their own emotions rather than dealing with everybody else's and know all these kids in one classroom that have all got different personalities.

Right? Anyway, I could fucking pull that system apart. Take me back to the coffee from 1967, been done at the same way at school curriculum. Hasn't changed in hundreds over a hundred years and we're still slamming the same. So I know we're not, we're probably giving them more, more connection to sexuality and suffered a really young age and crazy shit that thank fuck my kids aren't in school. But trauma is all those. When you think you're being kind and it gets kicked back in your face, that makes you feel like you're not enough.

So that when I kind of look back now, I'm like, that led me to a point of, I've always got to buy something new. It's always going to be good. So when I first took my kids, cause Tyler had made a mess five years ago, four years ago of his shirt. And we were meant to be going out for dinner. I'm not, I'm not going to contact her dinner, dress like that. I've got to find something else. And it's a Sunday afternoon, nothing's open. Right? And then I looked and I was like, oh, there's a lifeline. And told, he goes, let's just go in there. And I'm thinking, oh God, well, look, I wouldn't buy from an op shop because I had that mentality.

That is a, can't be old because it's ugly and you gonna get judged on it. Right. I didn't realize till even just sitting here now, fuck, that has come all the way through my life. Right. So it's just hit me now. I told my son, my son goes in there. He goes in the op shop all the time. He'll walk out the pants he's wearing today. He looks pretty good. Doesn't he? Yeah. $3 50 of the off shop the shoes come from somebody else. And not even his gift old shoes on a basketball court yesterday. Didn't cost him a think, right?

So it's like, mom, he will go in. You will come out with hats, pants, shoes, you name it for eight bucks, 20 bucks. So it's amazing. What kind of stuff?

Speaker 1 (1h 34m 28s): It's just that, just that mentality, I suppose. You know what I mean? We put all that pressure on yourselves. You know, when it, like, none of that stuff really matters, you know?

Speaker 2 (1h 34m 38s): And I'm going to bring another one up. And mum and dad, I love you very much. So don't take these in any way apart from if this can help other people. So my parents used to fight alone, right? Usually ran. They ran businesses and mum was well, dad ran a business. Well mom helped him run. It would only have a be around lots of alcohol, but faults would be huge. Right. And my mum wouldn't back down from anybody. That was one of the thing she put in instilled into me that no one's ever going to walk over you and trust me, girls, people still walk over us.

We've got to learn their own listen to the right time. But my mum tried to prepare me as best as she could, because really interesting because when I was like, you know, a young teenager, I thought I'd fallen in love. And anyway, the relationship, I remember standing in his house and I'm like, you don't even love me. He goes, I love you more than anything. And I'm like, well, you don't yell at me. You don't swear at me. You don't hit me. Nothing. Can you just hit me or something to show me that you love me right now? My parents didn't hit each other all the time. But when there was a lot of alcohol involved in something would go down, there would something would happen and you know, everyone would be cuddling afterwards.

And again, you'd realize they'd done something shit and they'd would fix it. But I grew up thinking love was, you know, lots of cuddles going out, being aggressive, swearing at each other, ignoring each other gain, lots of love. Do you know what I mean? Whereas the God that I was saying at the time he he's mom and dad never had before he never had ever had, he said, say a bad word. They were never allowed to swear in front of his mother. So the mother had been put on such a high pedestal, right in that space that any form of yelling, arguing, hitting to him was not love.

And it wasn't until we met about, ah, I think one of the boys 14, so they must've been about seven. We re met again. And we both started to understand that the reason why we weren't compatible was because we had two different ideas of what love was based on how we grew up. Now, if that doesn't start to make you think, right, you don't have to be your parents. You don't have to follow what they did. And you're not a failure. If you don't have the perfect marriage or the perfect relationship, or, you know, if they're fighting all the time, you don't want to fight, like there's no right or wrong.

Speaker 1 (1h 36m 56s): And this is a big thing too, when it comes to relationships like everyone's going on about love languages. And I think love languages is great. But the thing we need to go into more is like attachment styles, I feel. And, and how you deal with like, what is love to you? And like, how did your parents deal with conflict and stuff like that? Cause like you said, I found that same trap as well. You know, a lot, my mom dominated over my dad and my dad has put out with it.

You know what I mean? So then all of his life, well that's what you do is, you know, when you just let them do whatever he just put up with it. So it's funny how, yeah. Yeah. And that's why kids are, they're such sponges. They just soak everything up. So you've gotta be very careful and you know, maybe we're all, we're all human, we all make mistakes. But I, one thing I think it's really beautiful that I see you doing what you do is you're very quick to, I'm sorry. You're like, I don't think I've ever heard my mom or dad say sorry to ask. Is there anything never? No, one's I just think that, yeah, and that, that comes with humility and openness and conversation and being able to, to express, you know, that's just something that wasn't in our household at all.

Yeah. But yeah, you know, that was part of my journey and I feel like I'm probably the opposite now. I'm probably very open, very expressive, very good at communicating. Cause I didn't want to be like that. And if that makes sense. So then you're like you said, then you're, you've always become your values. You know what I mean? Like you learned from that summit, that's become like, yeah. Something that, and now that, like you said, that's why I am now a great communicator and good with kids and stuff like that. So that's yeah. It's really cool.

Speaker 2 (1h 38m 41s): Super powerful, super powerful.

Speaker 1 (1h 38m 45s): So that shows boys who's that tall

Speaker 2 (1h 38m 53s): To tell me that he

Speaker 1 (1h 38m 53s): Loves it. Okay.

Speaker 2 (1h 38m 56s): We were just talking about how cool you dress as smoothie. Yeah, no, I would probably want to share one more thing. So when we're talking about people having an understanding of what you've gone through, you know, giant crew, obviously I have two dads. I think I was going to ha I didn't have two dads. My kids have two separate dads to my kids and you think I'm going to grow up, get married once I have my kids be together forever. That's what you think.

Anyway, thinking is stinking by the way. So, you know, imagine my surprise and I'm with Les. Steve had the twins and you know, 60 minutes later I made another guy and he's amazing. And he's all these things beautiful, but there's also some shit to him as well. We've all got some shit parts to us. And you know, I remember

Speaker 1 (1h 39m 48s): When you said that

Speaker 2 (1h 39m 54s): I just hit the microphone. Did you feel that? And I remember him saying to me, cause like I would look after his three daughters as well as my, the twins and I was pregnant with Willie. And I just, I remember him saying to me, I can't wait til we're in our fifties and all the kids can just have the house and we just travel around Australia. Right. And we'll go and see everything. And I'm like, what? So he's another thing. Cause I said to him, when I'm in my fifties, I want my kids, my kids bringing their friends home and they can have fun and be here rather than roaming the streets.

And I want this to be a house where everyone can feel like they're welcome. I've got no interest in traveling around Australia, unless all the kids are with me. Right? Yeah. Save them. I've traveled overseas. I found a way to take all of my kids with me. I never leave a soldier behind. That's something I've always said to them. Right. So here's another thing. When you, when you are looking at being in a relationship up to both of you have the same, are you looking at the same things for when you get older, you know, sex is great and that impulses stuff and you know, feeling like you can get dressed up and you just feel like that's all amazing.

Right? And they treat you beautiful. There's always so much more than just that. You know, if someone had taught me to have more conversations in the beginning and ask more questions rather than being led by that impulsive Alma, gosh, he's amazing. Like I, that more of that sexual desire, it would've been a whole different story. Glad it wasn't because I got four incredible gifts out of both of the longterm relationships I was in. But seriously, it's like I had to stop and go.

There's why we're fighting. Because even though we haven't had that conversation, energetically, we both know different things are important to us. Right. Very different things are important. Now our energy field knows it's different. So that's a big thing. If you're in a relationship now, do you see, are you both on the same path to go wherever you are? You marriage is probably gonna be great is still have hiccups. But if you, if you're not take a deep breath, take a step back and then value. If you loved yourself, do you actually have to be in relationship with somebody else to feel like you're worth something?

Cause there's another massive one. We feel that we have to belong to someone to feel like we were something you already belonged to someone, your parents and send me, people told me about all my parents is my parents. And I'm like, your parents did the best. They knew with what they had to get you to where they got you to

Speaker 1 (1h 42m 20s): . If you believe in that stuff as well, like say you, you chose your parents. You know what I mean? They they've got the qualities that they have and they are the exact qualities that they need to have to then teach you and for you to then bring out the best in you. So if you look at just looking at the silver lining and just rephrasing things, instead of, you know what I mean? And a lot of people, you know, can call, call that bypassing. So, you know, it's not that you're not looking at the negatives that you've looked at the negative so much, you know, you know that, you know, you know, that side to it heavy started looking at the other side.

So I think, and this is another thing when it comes to gratitude, like I love gratitude, but, and, but some people think it's, you can go too far with it and just everything, you know, I mean, then you'd be, you're missing the point. You know? I mean, you've got to treat is about seeing everything as a whole, the positives and negatives and seeing it as one whole thing and saying, it's all your great for all of it. And it's, it's all balanced and it's like equally, it's all like, perfect. It's just,

Speaker 2 (1h 43m 26s): Just grateful for the good things.

Speaker 1 (1h 43m 28s): Yes.

Speaker 2 (1h 43m 28s): You've got to find the, you got to find the beauty in all the shit that you've gone through. Cause there's always beauty in there. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I think when, when I look at where I am in life, I gave up the, this is where I have to be. If for me, if every, my kids are happy, we're learning things. I'm happy. And we're all doing things with our body and we're doing things that are making us bring us joy.

Even if it's scaring the shit out of us before we do it. But it feels a lot. That's when we say yes. Yeah. That's amazing. Incredible day. You know? And I always say to Willie and Tyler and giant cruise a lot to Willie, I'd say to him all the time, thank you for picking me to be your mommy. Thank you for choosing me. And you know what he says to me, you're welcome. I mean, you're welcome. Like, and tall is the same, like it's hard work. If you've got a kid, that's got things that are showing on this, on, on the spectrum or autism, or I think what I love.

So we even play unified basketball. So we made a whole team. So there was not one team ever having a bike cause they had odd numbers. So when he went and jumped into basketball and we just seemed to now have all these kids that have started to come and join basketball. And it's like just watching these parents sit and watch their kids play. And then we're passing balls to him to make sure that they at least get two or three baskets. Even if they count, we stay in hand the ball back to him, hand the ball back to them handball. Cause they mostly playing against adults. But just watching the joy in these kids of I can do it is just amazing.

And when you watch the parents that are there to watch their kids, because everyone's perfect in my eyes, someone else say, but I'm not perfect. I'm like, fuck you. You are, you are perfect for exactly where you are, what you're meant to experience and know and learn right now, whether it's good, bad or indifferent, you perfect. But we're always so busy now. I'm not perfect yet. I'm not perfect yet. Fuck you are, you are, you are perfect. And he's one of the biggest things I'm guessing. We probably have to get ready to wrap this all up at some stage because we could talk for hours.

The people that you think are the ones that are meant to love you. Aren't always the ones that are meant to love you, right? If you just start by feeling love for yourself and taking that deep breath and slowing down, if it means listen to some meditation and just having somebody else talk you through some things is one great mid Tyson. It's on YouTube. And I can't even think of the name of it, but she just swears all the way through it, literally. Right. And if you're stressed or think something's going on, I'll send it to you and you can put it on your Facebook, but it's, it's powerful.

And it's this girl that just, she just, it's not horrific swearing. It's fuck it. Let that shit go. I think it's cold. I think I've probably sent it to you at some stage over the time when you think there's shit going on in your life. And it's hard work listening to meditation goes for about 10 minutes. I did that with my kids. I was so stressed about money. All these other things. I'm not going to say it's going to happen to you. But the next morning, $20,000 just over was in my bank account that I thought I was never going to say. Right. But I was so busy stressing about what I wasn't going to get when I did that.

Fuck it. Let that shit go meditation. It just let everything go. I'll actually let my kids do it with me. So we all let the energetic attachment to whatever it was that I was leaving the energy with gari. Right. So anyway, I may get judged for that. Doesn't matter. So, but I'll send it to you as well. Yeah. Cause I think that's something that people, if you just realized, breathe in, breathe out, let all that shit go. We don't have to hold onto it. Doesn't have to be us. What do I choose in this 10 seconds? Who do I want to be in this 10 seconds?

What can I create in this 10 seconds? If you are not creating something, whether you're coloring in a picture or you're reading a book or you're creating something that, you know, it might be a design of birthday cards. I don't know. But if you're not in a space of creation, you're in a space of dying energetically. So create creation is just so powerful because you're doing something. So if it's, even if it's just doing that, left-handed writing and staying in that question of what will it take for me to feel this? Or what would it take for me to have these?

What would it take for this to show up in my life, right? Going to that? Cause that's creating a new you, right? When your friend is someone or meeting someone new or starting a relationship, it doesn't matter whether it's a intimate relationship or it's just shaking. Someone's hand somewhere else. That's connecting to someone, that's a creation. You're creating a connection. Everything's creation. So if you're hibernating and hiding yourself, then you're not in the space of creation. So, you know, I might send you some stuff that we can put on your site. People can go back and have a look at it on things that they can create.

Speaker 1 (1h 48m 12s): Yeah. I liked that. It's a creation like a, for everyone thinks like art, you know, maybe there's things like music and stuff. And there's so many different things when it comes to the created creation and people sell on left brain. So more creative, less creative, and then right. Brain. It doesn't really matter. Anyone doesn't matter who you are can create something.

Speaker 2 (1h 48m 33s): So I've I've yeah, absolutely. So I even know someone that could probably read like a, a full manual book in a day and then be able to summarize it. Have they bought them bothered to monetize it? No, they can do it though. Yeah, but it's not about the money it's about for this. Person's about being in the present moment and feeling joy. Right? So it can be anything. It doesn't have to be one thing could be anything and everything you might just, you might like to, you know, clean your room a certain way then maybe go in and clean it. Other people's dreams or champagne, how to organize something.

That's a way of creation. Do you know what I mean? It could be absolutely. Anything could be brought in a kid's book. Could be anything. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (1h 49m 11s): I just want to go back to, I suppose, the fighting. What, what was it in you when you like, did you did use the 10 rounds? Fall rounds, 5, 6, 10 rounds. So

Speaker 2 (1h 49m 25s): 10 times. 10 minutes.

Speaker 1 (1h 49m 26s): Yeah. Okay. 10 to, so when you were in the depths of them fights and that look, what, what did you use to say to yourself and what was it that used to get you through like that tough time. And do you use that same trick tool mechanism to when you're going through tough something else in your life? And

Speaker 2 (1h 49m 46s): Absolutely. So I would always be in that space of I'm fitter faster, stronger than anyone else. So

Speaker 1 (1h 49m 55s): It was the toughest.

Speaker 2 (1h 49m 56s): Oh my gosh. So it was,

Speaker 1 (1h 50m 0s): Ah,

Speaker 2 (1h 50m 1s): I think in, in boxing, I think I had 14. I think I had stopped maybe two. Cause I never had a sit down in my punches cause I didn't listen to my dad ha funny that he's like, oh, I told you to sit down and your punches and they're stronger. And that's all I teach now. If I got in the ring now I'm nearly 50 chief. I've got in the ring. Now, most people couldn't even land at one on my head and I used to fight and get hit all the time. He's one of the biggest things that I learned from the other end of it is if you've learned something new and it feels light for you go and teach it to somebody else and then teach it to somebody else and teach it to somebody else.

The more you teach it, the more you ingrain it into you energetically. Right? And subconsciously. So, because I now had to start teaching all these other guys and girls had to move their head and get out of the way I had to start doing it myself. Now I had to start getting in the ring and make sure I was getting out of the way. So I had to practice over and over and over and over and over. It's just repetitive stuff. Right? I'm in the ring. I would have this conversation with whether it was God universe, that didn't matter, whatever

Speaker 1 (1h 50m 58s): You believe.

Speaker 2 (1h 50m 59s): Yeah. And I just just said, well, I'm here to make a difference. I'm here to show all these girls and women that you don't have to be a stock standard girl and do things this way and get married and have a white picket fence that you could step outside and be a mechanic or look whatever you wanted. So for me, it was like, this is my mission to show people, just follow your dreams and work hard, follow your dreams and go for it. Right. So I would have this conversation of, I remember it was my toughest fight was for the first w they say first time women ever, ever, ever been accepted into the WBC, the world boxing council.

And I was ranked number two. And then the boy, the twins, dad, Steve at the time said, oh, you're not gonna believe they started ranking women's boxing. The WBC started actually ranking women in boxing, which means obviously you can fight for them. And I'm like, oh, that's amazing. And he said, guess he's number two. I'm like, oh no, I guess you get dickhead Ryan. I'm like, oh, well he's number one. He says, Kelsey Jeffries. I'm like, okay. Okay. So I straight away find a way to email Kelsey Jeffries and ask her, does she want to have fought for the WBC inaugural first ever WBC women's fight in featherweight ever in history.

She says, no. So my writer who's number three. Who's number four. He's number five.

Speaker 1 (1h 52m 12s): She say no then.

Speaker 2 (1h 52m 14s): Cause she can, she didn't have to say yes.

Speaker 1 (1h 52m 16s): So she didn't actually own the title seals just right. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (1h 52m 21s): Okay. So I went straight to her, then I went to number three, number four, number five. I can't remember who they all were at the time. And then when number five, though, they all said, no, I went straight to the WBC and said, I'm ranked number two. I'm really grateful that I'm ranked number two, I've gone to this, this, this, and this. They've all said no to fighting, fighting me. Can you please find me a suitable opponent to fight for the title? And so they give me a woman that was one division lower than me. My seller salary. CUNA from Argentina. Now this woman used to look.

I remember watching her tapes when they arrived and I think, fuck them. I sprayed him tough over there. But this woman, when she knocked somebody out, you would say their feet Twitch. Right. And stays. And he's watching and he's like, oh, she's going to be white. She's strong. Like what? No, one's free to foster stronger. Cause I've trained with so many men. I'm like, I don't care what she's done. I literally don't care what she's on. She can't be stronger than me. There's no way out. They haven't trained. Like I have. So she could be fighting what we call tomato hands for all I know they're not, may not be great fighters.

So for them to get knocked out easy is probably not hard. She hasn't come up against me yet. It was the toughest thing. When I went into complete program, mum and dad moved out of a house. I said, leave a bed there and leave a fridge. I kind of lived on that. Nando's chicken and not much else, a bit of porridge. And I had no access to the TV antenna. All I had was all the, her fights and then sugar Ray, Leonard and Marvin Hagler. Now I've always been a Marvin Hagler. And she was a Marvin Hagler, which is someone that just barrels through paper and just keeps hitting.

I had to learn how to become sugar. Ray kind of did kind of didn't but in the F I think it was about the third round. I broke my finger and I was like, oh shit, thank God. I didn't have to punch in my fingers. I don't know what I'd done, but made me realize I need to punch more with my knuckles, not my, not the back part of my hand, my frontier knuckles, and then ran seven. She's headbutted me a beauty am I, I felt my whole cheek bone just cave in. And I'm like, I take a deep breath. I look up and it's between you and I. Now we haven't field.

It was indie weekend on the gold coast. We wanted 20,000 people. They were lucky to probably have two. It was like, not that I really knew a lot of that stuff anyway, but I was like, we didn't come this far to give this to somebody else. I have not fought all my life. I've not trained my ass off. I have not pushed myself to be, I've not fucking been belted by other people that should never, you know, that you would think wouldn't belt. You, you know, your brothers, parents, whatever. I've I haven't gone through that all my life till it, these women walk away with my gift with, with my world title.

And that's kind of where we're at. And I just kept going and they disputed the win. Every time I, every time she had something that was illegal, like headbutts or like overhand, bawling, punches, the referee didn't pull anything up and he's Hey, he actually said to me at the side of the fight, it doesn't matter what she does, Sharon. I'm not gonna pull her up because if she can test it, I want the WBC. Cause I'll actually watch the video of the fight as a committee. And then they'll make a decision, which she did contest it. And I said, he said, I'm not going to let them not see how, what she may be like.

So I'm just going to let her get away with everything. I'll pull you up if you're doing something wrong, but here, I'm going to let you get away with everything. That's not mine. Fuck these Martin. He was actually on you, the referee. And I'm like, thanks mate. But yeah, she'd been gone rafting and I was this little blonde Barbie doll. She's gonna be, she was putting baits on knocking me out in the fourth round and all this kind of stuff. And yeah, when my hand got held up in the end of my face was like really massive on one side, but I'd obviously out 40. And then I had to send the tapes off to the WBC and then they all watched it. And then they made decisions said, yep, she's definitely chairing in your cities, the world champion.

But that was probably the toughest. I remember seven o'clock in the morning, the next day.

Speaker 1 (1h 56m 14s): Do they still, but the same point score they got now, like, do they still give 10, nine rounds? And then so did you, what was the points? Do you remember what that was? It was

Speaker 2 (1h 56m 24s): No, but I think I won are probably one, I'm thinking a hundred ninety seven hundred ninety six and then there was 192. So one judge, because you got three judges, they all sit in different areas, right? So some people go, how could that judge have such a different school? And it depends what you might have seen a lot more than the other two judges could cause a referee could be in the way, one of the spiders can be in the way anything. And it was so funny because the next morning at seven o'clock and I couldn't go to the after-party or anything, my face was so big.

I had a beautiful dress to wear. It was just so stunning, but I couldn't, I put down anyway, but my face looked like shit anyway, but

Speaker 1 (1h 57m 4s): Finical

Speaker 2 (1h 57m 4s): The next morning, the phone rings and I pick the phone up and I hear this. Hello, can I speak to Sharon in yours? And I'm thinking, oh, they've given me a reporter that can speak English. Cause I'm figuring it's media. Yeah. And I'm like, yeah, he's calling plays. And I hear this it's cost to the zoo. And I'm like, oh my God. And it just blew me away that, you know, cause again, you never think you're important. But when he realized he'd seen that I'd won the fight, he wouldn't bring me first thing in the morning, gradually figured obviously she's going to be busy or not. And he said he was the fist phone call I got.

And we've been friends ever since, which has been beautiful and a big thing that also, you know, the WBC take once you're a champion, you're always a champion with you still fall. And when you haven't fought for a long time where you've been retired, you're always a champion. So when you go there, even the male champions, you know, Floyd, Mayweather's Vanda, Holly fields, Lennox Lewis, they all spend time with everyone. It's amazing. You know, I'll get some, don't say like I'm disgusted or Ozzy from, you know, out of the back of nowhere, a little Maui girl, the moccasin slogan, you

Speaker 1 (1h 58m 6s): Know?

Speaker 2 (1h 58m 8s): And, and I think, fuck, I've just rubbed shoulders with gave me, probably put people up on too much of a pedestal, but to kind of be a woman woman and get to where I got in such a male-dominated sport was just fucking amazing. Literally it was amazing. And there was plenty of times where I'd read off the rails and I was either drinking or partying or doing something else. There's plenty times I could have just sidewall. I had no corner. And I was like, I had to ask myself the question, what am I hateful? And it doesn't have to always be the perfect dancer, but I'm here to make a difference.

Well, okay, great. Show me how I can do that. Going straight into question. So what would it take for me to make a difference means getting out of bed. If I can show somebody else's struggling everyday just to get out of bed and that's me making a difference and I can lead by that and I can go and give a couple other guys at work, a hug or a couple of girls, a hug. I decided I was going to be an okay day, but that's making a difference. That's a start. Do you know what I mean? So being in that question of what can I do to make the difference to do this, to have this?

Speaker 1 (1h 59m 4s): Yeah. Cool. All right. Well, we've definitely covered a lot of things today. It's been really cool, but I always ask this that everyone want podcasts, but if you could say like, you know, for anyone out there, what is your top like three, like tangible, like actionable things that people can do right away that, you know, that will help benefit their life.

Speaker 2 (1h 59m 30s): Yeah. Okay. Okay. So it would be one breathe deep in and out. Take some big deep breaths, even if it's five, even if you stop setting an alarm on your phone for every hour and just stop and take five deep breaths and just really relax your shoulders.

Speaker 1 (1h 59m 43s): Oh, I've actually dove into breathing. I did probably about five years ago. And then I redone now cause like, I like to keep up to date and the amount of stuff that's coming at now at that book breeze. It's absolutely incredible. What breast can do. If you want to read a book, read, breathe. I haven't read the book, but I went and listened to all his podcasts. So he bought basically it says the same things, but

Speaker 2 (2h 0m 7s): If you're a smoker, go and get the book. Cause you'll probably realize you don't need the cigarettes because it's all about the breath and

Speaker 1 (2h 0m 13s): Steven like little things I did not know. Did you know that like even breathing say left and right. Nostril makes a difference. Yeah. So throughout the day, just, and this is like my theory, and this is probably going to upset a few people or might not anyway, I don't really care either way, but I, this whole COVID thing I don't really is blown away for portion. Right. And one thing I noticed wearing a mask because it was covering my face.

I started breathing out of my mouth right now. Our nose is designed to, we're supposed to be through our nose. It's got its own filtration system, everything. So we, we have to be through. I know. So a lot of us, especially when we're talking between our mouth, a lot of health issues come from breathing from our mouth and not our nose. Yeah. And then when you, when I was around the mask, it was forcing me to breathe through my mouth. Right? So that's the whole conspiracy theory that I think that these mass, so, but anyway, what I wanted to say is with the breathing, the, what, the, the book, the most important thing he says to doing there is breathe through your nose and obviously slow your breathing down.

But one little trick, I didn't realize they just get a little bit of masking tape. So when you're asleep, it just on your lips, doesn't have to be a big piece. It's a tiny piece just to keep your lips together. It's more of just unconscious thing. So your lips feel the tape and they don't open. So you constantly breathing through your nose during your sleep. And they're apparently your quality of sleep. Just go through the roof. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (2h 1m 52s): Completely incredible. And I've now had a number of other people that have done it as well. And it's transformed how they sleep, has transformed, where they snore. Don't snore, it's transformed a lot. And another thing on breathing with a mask on, if what the trays don't need way breathing and then what we don't need. They breathe in. If we're whatever we're breathing out and then we're breathing back in, it's not actually for us. So when we massed up all the time, we constantly breathe them back in our own air. That is meant to go somewhere else, not back into us. So there's another bit of theory and I don't have all the words on me right now, but so deep breath, even if it's just stopped for every hour and just take, stop, just be present.

I think about yesterday, a minute ago later, just five deep breaths every hour. And if you can try and meditate, the other one would be left-handed writing. Even if you just right-handed writing. If you left-handed, if you, if you're just writing down your gratitude and ask the questions in it. Right. And then the other one, I think that I think is really tangible. It's been a long time since you've gone done something.

That's fun. Like jumping on a swing or

Speaker 1 (2h 3m 8s): Yeah, for me, it's gone in the ocean getting them surf. Yeah. That's yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (2h 3m 13s): Going to that, literally go and do that. We forget when we get older as adults, that life is about being fun. And that's why I love the kids I've got. Cause we're always doing things that brings them joy. So we're always having fun.

Speaker 1 (2h 3m 26s): And I think like for me personally, like I get along with all kids, you know what I mean? I think the reason is, is because I haven't lost that, you know, I'm always out surfing out doing stuff and I talk to people and you're like, well, what'd you do when you w what would you do when you were a kid? That was fun. I used to always do that. Like, well, when's the last time you do that? Oh, okay. Remember? And I was like, well, why don't you go do that? And they're like, oh, makes sense. You know, I like, I know people that will, I might see was so good on the drums.

You know, I could doing, I was almost last name. He played drums. He's like, oh, no, probably five years ago. And I was like, go do it, man. I used to love it. And he was like, shit on my go buy a drum kit. You know, just things that you forget,

Speaker 2 (2h 4m 9s): All those, those things that you used to do that brought you joy, you no longer doing. So you're not filling that gap. It's now just vacant space.

Speaker 1 (2h 4m 17s): Yeah. Or you're filling it with negative things that you shouldn't be doing. Yeah. Okay. Any other tips?

Speaker 2 (2h 4m 27s): Yeah. Sunshine, sunshine, sunshine, sunshine. If he can get out in the sunshine, get out in the sunshine. I know we're so used to working at home or working in doors, or if you can get out into the sun, get out into the sun, because that just starts feeding you and energetically feed you on so many levels.

Speaker 1 (2h 4m 43s): Everything on this planet lives off the sun. And we're included in that. And yeah, I think there needs to be a lot more studies done on the payroll. One, the sun and to the ocean for me, like they, them to a PA I can be, I can go for a server come and be a completely different vibration or energetically. I can just be like, like almost like night and day, like I could be going in there and feeling, and then coming out. So yeah, a hundred percent. Yup.

Speaker 2 (2h 5m 15s): Cause the thing about the beach and the ocean, that the amount of nutrients that are in sand is powerful and we soak it up through our feet. So yeah. The more sun,

Speaker 1 (2h 5m 28s): Absolutely.

Speaker 2 (2h 5m 29s): You so much. I've had so much,

Speaker 1 (2h 5m 32s): It's been great. I really appreciate you coming along to the, about a podcast. We always have great conversations and I think you're an amazing person. And every time I hang out with you, I see you. I always leave feeling better. So for me, that's feeling light. So I'll always be here.

Speaker 2 (2h 5m 51s): I'm the same. I'm the same. And I do want to just share quickly too. I've got some great guests to bring on. I won't go into it too much. I might just send some information through to your page. I've got a young lady, he's done some incredible things to help kids with taking care of all they'd industry needs being stuck on lately. So I'll send to me if my team maybe share it on your page.

Speaker 1 (2h 6m 14s): Awesome.

Speaker 2 (2h 6m 15s): Thank you. And thank you everyone. I just, everyone that is listening. I just want you to know something that doesn't matter where you are. It doesn't matter what language you speak, what color you are, what size you are. I just want you to know from my heart to your heart, I love you very much. And you are a gift of you're still on this earth. You're a gift. Thank you.

Speaker 1 (2h 6m 33s): Beautiful. Thanks. Thank you for listening to the new and amount of podcast. If you liked what you heard, please like, and subscribe. Also, if you'd like to know a bit more about us, jump on Instagram. , I'm the school and Nirvana on Facebook. Also, if you'd like to check out our services and if we can help you in any way, jump on our website, dot com.