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Tomorrow can be different from today.
Our lives often leave us feeling hopeless—like nothing will ever change. But perspective is everything. When you know where to look, hope can be found in the spaces and places you least expect.
Join Jason Gore (Lead Pastor of Hope Community Church) for a fresh perspective, practical steps, and weekly encouragement that hope really is possible… even in real life.
WEBVTT - This file was automatically generated by VIMEO
So for me, at that point, I was like, oh, I'm doing great.
They have a dad who's present.
But that's not what my kids needed.
My kids needed something different.
Welcome to the Hope and Real Life podcast with Jason Gore.
Our team is passionate
and committed to bringing you more hope in the everyday
real areas of your life.
If this conversation and content is valuable for you,
please do us a favor, like, subscribe, and even share.
You never know how valuable it could be
to share a little bit of hope with someone else.
Let's get the conversation started.
Well, welcome to this episode of Hope in Real Life,
where our goal, as you just heard, is
to bring a bit more hope into the everyday moments,
uh, of our listeners lives.
I'm here this week, uh, with a friend
by the name of Brian Wynn.
And, uh, I'm gonna tell you
before I introduce you, Brian, this, uh, this topic,
if there's ever been a topic that we've had on this show
where I was actually seeking the hope myself, Mm-Hmm mm-Hmm.
It's this one. And so it falls under the idea
of parenting hacks, helping busy parents figure it out.
Yeah. And so, uh, welcome to the show, Brian.
Glad to have you here. I'll say this, some dear friends
of mine that I deeply respect in the world of parenting, uh,
recommended you as the one to come on to this show,
to talk to us about this.
And so I'd love you to just take a moment,
introduce yourself to us. I,
I love it. Uh, yeah.
Thanks for having me. Absolutely.
First and foremost, um, um, I'm Brian Wynn, owner
of the Muse Coffee Shop in Garner
and in Lynchburg, Virginia.
And I'm excited to be here on the podcast. Right
On. Yeah. So, so
we're,
if we're talking about helping busy parents figure it out,
you just said you're a coffee shop owner.
That's right. Uh, in two different states. That's right.
You know, in two different coffee shops. Yes.
And, and, but you don't, you're not,
you were very clear when we were talking before the show.
Mm-Hmm. You're not a business owner.
Uh, you're a business worker as well.
You're nine to five in a coffee shop.
What, what's your normal schedule look like? That's right.
So I, I'm also in telecommunications as a whole, so I work
for a company called Adcom Solutions.
I'm an account manager. Okay.
That's like my nine to five day job. Okay.
And then we also run, operate Owner,
operate two coffee shops, Lynchburg and Garner.
Okay. Um, we have a great staff of kids there
that are working in the shops, so we don't have
to be in the day-to-Day at this time.
Right. When we first started, I was coffee shop guy 24 7.
But now in this state, we've been in business since 2008.
And so we're playing a different game of owning a business
and facilitating a business versus being in the
business. And so, yeah.
Right on. And you said we,
and so just to highlight that, that is you
and your wife of 21
Years. 21 years. 21
years. Exactly.
Tell us a little bit about your Wife.
Um, she's amazing.
Love of my life.
Um, we're both kind of southern California people
and, uh, we didn't meet there, but where we're from there
and then we met in church in Northern Virginia.
And, uh, it's been awesome since. Okay. So, yeah.
And I don't, I don't know that you said this,
but, uh, so married for 21 years.
Mm-Hmm. Again, owner operator, two coffee shops, two states.
You also have a nine to five job. Yes.
And there's three children Yes. In the picture. Mm-Hmm.
18, 15, and 10. That's right. Okay.
So if we needed to talk to somebody
who lives the everyday busy life Mm-Hmm.
But is somehow balancing it, it's you.
So I think we've got, oh boy, the right person.
Now, I do wanna say this. I, I do live in Garner what,
where Muse is, and every time
I hear somebody talk about your coffee shop,
they're talking about number one great coffee.
Oh, that's awesome. But they're also talking about a great
environment that's clearly there for the community.
That's right. And so appreciate, man, everything
that you guys do for the
community and for what you stand for.
Yeah. That's our heart. Um, let's do this.
Um, how do you navigate between parenting and working?
You got a lot going on.
We got listeners out here that are doing the nine to five,
but they're not happy with that.
Mm-Hmm. So they're probably trying to run their side hustle
as well, trying to figure out, man,
what dreams can I really bring to life?
We've also got kids, which are a large part of our dream.
Yeah. How do you navigate the whole thing?
Uh, that's a great question. You know, for us,
it's been a lot of trial and error.
Um, we are not perfect,
and we have absolutely fallen forward up this hill.
Um, if I look back in time on
how we've navigated our time poorly, our kids,
when we started this, lived in Sam's, Sam's Club.
Like they hate Sam's Club now because we would go there
and we'd have to be there for the shops in the busy times.
And, you know, my wife's a stay at home mom,
and she got to school and homeschool our kids
for a time and for a season.
And it just felt like the kids were absorbed in the business
that we were starting, um, at that, at that point,
they were in the business with us.
And in a perfect world,
they would not have been in a perfect world,
we would've said, we're having kids,
let's put this business Id on hold until they get
to a certain age and then start the business.
That's what I would advise any entrepreneur.
If you don't have kids, absolutely you can do it.
But with the kids, it, to me, it would be favorable
to wait till your kids are a certain age.
Yeah. So, yeah, navigating as kids was tough,
but, um, communication is really the key to
navigating this time.
You have to be able to communicate clearly with your spouse,
with your kids to understand their wants
and their needs so you can have that unique quality time
with them that's appropriate.
It's gonna be different for everybody, but if you're not
communicating and you're assuming things are blowing up
behind the scenes and getting worse, so, yeah.
Yeah. And how long,
how long have you been running the coffee shops?
Since 2008. 2008? Yes. And that was in Virginia.
And then when did the one in Garner? Uh,
Three years ago. Okay.
We've opened the Garner store.
Yes. And did you find there's kind of different seasons
of busyness or, or we, we use, we'll use the term phases
for your children and like when you felt like it was maybe
less healthy, but when you felt like it was more healthy
where they could understand what was going on? Y
Yeah. You know, the younger
ages when, when, you know, success,
when they're little kids,
you gotta bounce 'em on their knee.
You gotta spend time with them.
You have to look 'em in the eye and give them kisses.
It's kind of easy, that whole six to nine
to 10 when they're trying to learn
to communicate well, it's a little tough.
And you're trying to work out quality time for them
to be who they are.
Wonderful little kids. That's
where we'd absolutely struggled with our first.
Um, it was tough
'cause we were doing coffee shop businesses.
So again, like I said, some of our kids,
my middle kid who's 15 Jace, he would, um,
sleep on coffee beans while I'm roasting coffee.
So tough times.
But we had, there's also lots of,
uh, positives that have come out of that.
He's entrepreneurial mindset.
He understands what goes into business.
He has a excellent work ethic.
So there's no one perfect, um, equation for people.
But being present and having conversations
with individuals is, is the key.
So asking your kids, what do you need from dad right now?
What kind of father do you want?
And you want me to, you know, spend quality time?
How, how do we need to spend quality time together?
Things of that nature. Yeah.
So, so what you're saying is, I mean,
there might not be a right size Mm-Hmm.
Fits all when it comes to parenting,
especially in the midst of Yeah.
It's interesting that you say that because I mean, I,
so I have three kids as well, and they are, they're all,
they're all three very, very different Mm-Hmm.
And the time that they need
and the type of energy that they need
and when they need it, all, those are very different.
And so, uh, I, I think this idea of
trying to figure out, okay,
what are our goals as a family, right?
But then if we're gonna raise these children, well, um,
what are their needs Right.
As children? And then how do we, can we merge those two?
And if we can't, you've got some difficult decisions
that you've gotta make, but you gotta make it on purpose,
otherwise it's gonna be made for you.
Yeah, absolutely. I, you know, again, my, my measure
of success failure might be different than others.
Yeah. You know, success failure is a kid that feels loved,
that feels safe, and
that can openly communicate their feelings.
Um, again, we we're not perfect.
We, we struggled with our oldest,
and she's turned out wonderful.
She's amazing girl. And she, you know, we're building
that conversation bond now.
Um, the other, it's been easier as we've learned ourselves
how to communicate with our kids
and with each other, my wife and I.
Um, but success for me and my wife
and our family is that they love the Lord
and everything else is secondary.
Or do they need to be rich and successful? Absolutely not.
Do they just need to be who God entitled
or who God made them to be?
Absolutely. That's the success.
So if they're loving Jesus
and they're growing in that, yeah.
That's success. Yeah. So,
So you're looked to by onlookers people from the
outside is, man, this is a guy that's,
um, he's getting it done.
He's getting the hustle done. Yeah.
He's, uh, he's, he's got a business. He's navigating life.
He's raising children.
The best we can tell are, are healthy.
You said, you know, they're loved, they're feeling safe,
they can communicate their feelings.
That's right. Um, so the listeners, we,
we probably got something like, that's great for him.
Mm-Hmm. I'm not there. Sure. I don't have that.
Maybe, is there, there are stories that you can just tell
of like a time that you weren't getting it right.
Just so our listeners understand, like, there really is hope
and maybe they're not so far away from where it is
that they hope to be.
Yeah. Um, again, I like,
I'm, I'm logical guy.
Like, I wanna know what the solution is,
what's, what's the fix?
And, you know, when we were struggling when we first
started, the kids were sleeping on the pallets and whatever.
We didn't know we were struggling at that point.
We thought we were doing the best so that we could. Yeah.
I didn't have a father, no father in the house.
So my kids absolutely got what I didn't get.
So for me, at that point, I was like, oh, I'm doing great.
They have a dad who's present,
but that's not what my kids needed.
My kids needed something different.
So as we have grown up and they've gone back
and communicated some of their hurts
and what they have seen, that's
how I've now evaluated our success
or failure, if you wanna use those words as, as parenting.
So when they were younger,
they didn't feel like they could say,
I don't wanna stay at the shop all day long.
I want to be at home. So that's why I kind
of lean on communication.
My wife didn't want to be the one responsible
for doing all the bills all the time.
I was like, you're the one that's gonna do it.
I can't do it, so you're gonna do it.
And unfortunately, you know, we never really had that deep,
heartfelt conversation.
And both my wife and I are both passive aggressive.
So we'll allow things to kind of build
and then explode. Yeah. So, um,
Yeah. I'm sure none of
our listeners can connect with
that at all in their marriage
or understand what that's like.
Yeah. So we're gonna pause this episode just for a moment
to let you know about a resource that we have to offer
for you on personal development and spiritual enrichment.
And so this is the Hope in Real Life mobile app.
It is a free tool made specifically for our listeners,
for anyone else who needs a little bit more hope
in their everyday life.
Yes. Brian, the Hope
and Real Life app, it offers multiple features like daily
devotions, parenting tips, Mm-Hmm.
Which is what we're here to talk about this week.
Uh, financial resources, marriage insights,
and who knows, I'm not sure
where this gets dropped in the podcast.
Maybe we've talked about it. Maybe it's who's supposed
to do the dishes and when That's right.
It's covered. Big topic of conversation
and in a community where you can share your prayer request.
So head on over to the Apple store or Google Play
and be sure to download the app
and jump on this opportunity.
You can interact with it daily, make it a part
of your routine, connect with others
and help spread hope tomorrow can be better than today.
And hope is possible even in real life.
Man, I'm getting on this right now.
I'm excited. Thank you. Yes,
Sir. Mm-Hmm. I
think ultimately the, the practical,
the practical fix for helping that busy mom
and dad navigate is you have to learn internally
what, what, um, your own felt needs.
Yeah. What your felt needs are. Okay.
And be able to communicate that well.
And to me, it goes back to counseling that I've received.
Yeah. Right. So I've received counseling.
We, my wife and I have both been in counseling
for the past probably eight years on and off.
And through that counseling, we've exposed past traumas,
which color the way we view life today.
I think everyone has traumas that they're getting over.
No dad, uh, abusive family, uh, abusive family member.
Um, anything that's trauma and how you dealt with that.
Colors, how you deal with people today in life, colors,
how you deal with your kids, for sure.
Colors how you deal with your spouse.
So earning to deal with that young kid that did that trauma
and telling that little kid that he's okay
and he's gonna be okay, is a growing thing
that I think everyone needs to experience.
And then reset the button
and say, okay, now I'm gonna be a human being.
I know, I know my areas of deficit
and I know where other people's areas of deficit
'cause they can have that open conversation with me.
I, again, I'm tooting the same horn.
Communication is key, but you have to have kind
of grown internally a little bit there. Right.
And you gotta learn how to communicate.
And you, you said this again in the pre-show,
but this idea, I mean, this is, this is supposed
to be a session, uh,
an episode about helping busy parents figure it out.
Yeah. But the reality is, in the midst of our busyness,
we don't take the time to slow down.
Yeah. And to really understand why we feel the way
that we feel, the way they think, the the way that we think.
Mm-Hmm. Um, the pace that we run.
I mean, what I learned about myself is, um,
there's a reason why I run at the pace that I run in.
Mm. And it's often not healthy. Yeah. Yeah.
Sometimes it's not just to run towards something,
but sometimes we're running from something.
Yep. And unless we sit down
and are willing to go through the counseling, willing
to have the conversation, man, we might not deal with it.
And this is where it comes back to parenting. That's right.
You don't figure that stuff out. Yeah.
You're Raising your children in an environment
that's not thriving.
Right. Is not everything that it could be.
So I appreciate you pointing out the
counseling Yeah. And the need,
I mean, the, the Christian counseling aspect of that.
Not, not to say there's a difference,
but there is a piece that usually resonates
with my Christian friends, which is your idols.
Right? Yeah. So if your idol is making money, when things
detract from you making money,
it's a hindrance and a pain point.
So when your kids want quality time,
but money is your idol, you have a pain point.
Yeah. When your kids are your idol
and they don't get straight A's, they don't listen
and do what you're told, then you overreact to your kids.
If, if, if you expose your idols and we all have them
and they're on the throne where God's supposed to be,
when we deal with those idols, that breaks us from a freedom
to be able to go, oh my gosh.
Right now I'm struggling with not feeling disrespected.
Right. Because they're not listening to me.
But ultimately I have the wrong idol on
the throne. So, yeah.
Um, you mentioned this earlier.
You said you didn't, I think you said you didn't have a dad.
Yeah. But again, and one of the questions I wanted
to ask you is like, what,
what did you learn from your parents
and what did you take out of your
relationship with your parents growing up?
So I'd love to hear a little bit about that. Yeah.
Uh, I, you know, my mom,
I think it's a heavy conversation.
Yeah. But anyway, my mom, uh, single mom pretty much,
even though my dad was there, we had a parallel family
that I didn't know about till much later.
That was my age kids as well. Wow.
Um, when I was, uh, I guess around nine when that kind
of was exposed to my mom,
and again, I'm the youngest, oldest of my family of four.
My oldest sister is 64 right around there.
Um, but yeah, so that happened
and our, our world kind of just blew up.
And so what I learned from my mom as she was dealing
with kind of the worst pain ever is that we're
so very fragile as humans
and we kind of do things to, to survive and to get by.
So I watched her numb herself from the pain of my dad.
I watched her not be present,
but present all at the same time in my life
by when she could loving me, which was just beautiful.
Um, I look back at my mom, I kind
of see now kind of what she was going through.
So I learned a tenacity from my mom. Okay. That was there.
Um, I learned a resilience that we can kind of get
through some of the worst things ever and be okay.
Um, yeah.
I think that's what I learned
the most from my mom. Yeah. Yeah.
And well, you can, and you can tell you
definitely learned that by the way.
Yeah. That she's navigating everything
that's going on in your own life.
Oh. If we were trying to get real practical Sure.
For our listeners Sure. Um, what are some things
that parents can, what,
what can we integrate into our lives Yes.
Into our regular schedule that will help us
get this work life or busyness time with our kids Sure.
To get that more straight in line with where it needs to
Be. Okay. Practical
Sabbath. Yeah.
So, um, when we opened our shop, we were,
we were open on Sundays for the first like year or two.
Then I felt God was quick to say,
and not to get too churchy,
but God was quick to say in my heart, we need
to have our day of rest and honor that and keep that holy.
As soon as we did that,
our sales immediately started increasing.
Wow. So last Monday, Monday through Sunday,
but our Monday through Saturday day started
to pick up dramatically.
Wow. And so we saw God be faithful in that area.
We absolutely put that into play into our family life
where Sabbath is the day that we do much of nothing and rest
and play and honor the Lord.
And I think if you can have that,
and if you struggle against Sabbath, you're, you are,
unfortunately, you're exposing those idols.
I don't have time to do a Sabbath.
Well, then you're exposing an idol for whatever reason.
That is why you can't do
That Sabbath. It's productivity. Maybe
there's something else
that you're willing to pay the price to instead
that's opposed to what it is you want.
That's right. And and I, it's a safe place for those
who don't have the dollars to pay rent it.
You know, that's a different story.
I wanna make that disclaimer right.
We're, this is a, a little bit of place of privilege
that I have a nine to five job I can rest on Saturday,
but when you can rest on Saturday
or rest on Sunday, I'm, excuse me.
You need to take that and you need
to be present with your family.
And that, that was the start of de busy, uh,
our world. Okay. So yeah.
So Sabbath, that's one day a week. Mm-Hmm.
What about, say when we come home from the nine
to five on Monday?
Sure. Tuesday, Wednesday. Yeah.
I, again, uh, each, each individual is different.
So my wife, um, she likes to cook dinner.
She likes to, uh, get the kids ready for school.
She enjoys that. We've had that conversation.
She enjoys that. Um,
she doesn't love doing the dishes so much.
So the kids typically will end up doing the dishes on
myself, will end up doing the dishes. Can
They come by my house when they finish up at your house?
Abso absolutely they can.
Again, we have great kids 'cause they,
I wanna be cool. They share,
my wife is very faithful in doing the dishes,
and she knows it's because I hate it.
Um, and I do try to do it,
but I'm just telling you, it is a place
of potential kitchen in our family. So
I hear you. And my
wife does the dishes predominantly like
during the day when she's like it, because I do them wrong.
Right. So apparently the silverware cannot
go anywhere, but at the top. Right?
Yeah, That's right. I,
I've learned this the hard way. Yeah.
I, and I use that excuse myself,
and that does, it's still not accepted.
It's still not understood, understood, understood.
So I just, I'm supposed to learn the right way.
If I cared enough, I would learn the right way.
And now I'm talking about our
counseling sessions on the podcast.
I love it. I love, and that's not love it
necessary right now. I love
No, that's, that's key.
That's key. Hey, if you currently are not connected
to a church or, or maybe you're not sure about the whole
faith thing, or you, you gave up on church a long time ago,
I want you to understand, like, church hurt is a real thing.
And so that's understandable,
but you don't need to miss out on the encouragement
and on the hope that that, that knowing Jesus
and being part of a community of believers has to offer.
So I wanna tell you about something here. Get Hope tv.
It's an online church experience
where you'll find engaging music, uh, a message
that's relevant to the everyday moments of your life.
Uh, and, and it's that that service is put on
by Hope Community Church.
And I hope our greatest desires that people would come
to know who God really is, would be able to walk in his ways
and, and find the ways to experience hope in the everyday
moments of our lives.
Listen, you don't have to have everything all figured out
to to tune in with us.
Uh, you can, even if you're meant you're at home.
So feel free, stay in your pajamas,
listen at the gym when you're getting in your workout,
but get Hope TV online Sunday mornings 9:30 AM 11:15 AM
There's even an option to join us on Saturdays at 4:15 PM
or 6:00 PM as well.
Wherever you are, you're welcome.
We'd love to have you tune in with us at Get Hope tv.
Here's the deal. And I, maybe,
maybe this'll get us all back on the same page.
Maybe I'm just a crazy one.
But this is like my, I come home from work Mm-Hmm.
And let's start before that. Yep. Uh, I get up early. Yep.
I get up anytime between 4 45 and five.
And that's because I need some time for myself.
So whether that's working out, uh, time in scripture,
prayer, meditation, whatever that is.
Yep. I need to do that, taking care
of myself before the kids get up.
Mm-Hmm. So then the kids get up.
Um, usually my wife does the breakfast
and I'm kind of there to referee for the, for the kids.
So, um, and so every now
and then we'll trade off on that role.
But, uh, that seems to be the quickest route to deescalation
and the busyness of mornings.
Sure. Then we head to work, come home
and man, it's like one kid's going to wrestling practice.
That's right. One kid's going to football practice.
Those are in different places. Right. They're matches.
So we're driving in different ways
and in different directions,
getting home at different times, and
we sit down to eat dinner.
Right. And it doesn't feel like the TV shows
that I watched growing up at like five 30 in the sun down,
it's like, we gotta get dinner started at eight o'clock.
Yeah. So we can feed the kids, get 'em in the shower
and get 'em into bed at 9, 9 30.
So I can turn around and it's like, man, how in?
And then be a husband Yes. And then be a husband. Yeah.
Right? Yeah, absolutely. You know,
and so how in the world does that person, um,
maximize the minutes that they have?
And now I'm just telling you that's how Sure.
This has been my approach is just asking that question,
how do I, if there's only gonna be minutes.
Yep. Number one, is that too much stuff?
And number two, if it's not Mm-Hmm.
And that's what works for you. How do you
maximize the minutes that you have when you
are together in the downtime?
Oh, man, this is gonna sound weird,
but I don't have that measure of maximizing minutes per se.
Right. I, I have the measure of being still
and present in the Lord.
Like that's what he calls us to do, is just
to be in him and be present.
And, um, I think if you put in there, I have
to do zero through Z, right?
Yeah. Within 24 hour days,
you're already setting yourself up for failure.
Right. Because you'll never measure up
and you'll need to maximize those minutes.
But again, practically you, you have to do, you have
to send these kids, the kids to school
and they have to get to their games.
Yeah. To me, that's conversations.
But at the end of the day, you have to, um, you have
to be doing what God has called you to do.
Be a husband, be a wife, um, love your kids
and then maximize your time.
To me, that means like for our kids,
our kids, my son runs track.
We'll, we'll take turns taking him to track.
My oldest daughter did theater and, um, art
and we'll take turns getting her
to art class or whatever it was.
Um, but ultimately it was having that balance of
what was my purpose.
My purpose. And I, I don't know how to say that
for everyone else, it's, the purpose is to be in the Lord.
It is not hyper spiritualizing that, I mean,
that he's not asking much
of anything other than to just love others.
Yeah. Like, that's the extent. And with that, I have peace.
I've read, I've met that threshold.
If I'm loving my kids, I'm loving my family.
It's just a check mark.
So, and I don't feel that pressure
of I'm gonna maximize my time.
Yeah. My pressure is, am I loving,
like God loves me, then I'm doing okay.
Period. Because they'll, you'll go through season seasons.
You young, young dads, young kids, you're crazy. Yeah.
Then as they get older and mature
and it gets easier, they can help out do chores, it's great.
But ultimately, you know, that's just life
and as a whole up and down.
Right. Um, being present in the Lord, reminding ourselves
of the gospel daily, knowing that he loves us,
that he's providing all good things for us, um, is the what,
it's what stabilizes everything.
Yeah. And then in that you'll find the peace
and the rest to just do what you can.
Yep. Right. And that's all you can do what you can.
Yeah. And so what I'm hearing from you is it's not
necessarily to maximize the minutes to,
to accomplish a bunch of, to-do lists.
That's right. If you're gonna use that word,
maximize the minutes, it's to maximize the minutes
to be present both with God and with your children.
Yes. With your family. Yeah. So be present.
So things like, Hey,
why don't we put our phones away for a little while?
Mm-Hmm. Why don't we be, you just look at each other face
to face, you know, there's a passage.
Yeah. And I know all of our listeners aren't, um,
aren't necessarily followers of Jesus.
They might not look to the Bible for all their wisdom.
Um, I do. And
so I don't really have too much wisdom outside of that neither.
But, uh, in, uh, Deuteronomy, it talks about like
as you are going Mm-Hmm.
Along the path. Mm-Hmm.
Um, these are the times that we need to remind our,
our children of the things that are important
to us in our lives.
Mm-Hmm. And so I think oftentimes we can miss the fact
that just because we're in the car driving
from A to B, right.
That actually is a time that you can still be present.
Right. You actually can maximize on those minutes.
And if it wasn't for the ability to, like, okay,
we're together, so how do I love them?
Well, in this moment that we're together,
we're not necessarily sitting
around the dinner table at this moment,
but we are somewhere together.
So how can we be present together instead
of being distracted by all the busyness
that's going on Yeah. Around
This. Absolutely. I,
again, the measure of success is huge. Right.
So if when you are done and your days are over
and you look back at your life,
you're gonna measure your success different than you
as dad in it today.
Yeah. And the goal is to get the same measurement
of successes that when we look back
and go, oh, was I there for my kids?
Right. That's success. Uh, did I love my wife?
That's success. And that's the focus.
You know what, with what?
We can't, did they play every sport? No, they couldn't.
Right. Because we couldn't get 'em there. Right.
So we have to draw the line. No. Yeah.
Unfortunately, I can't get you there, so you can't go. Yeah.
So yeah, again, changing focus on
what success failure is will absolutely be
helpful. That's my focus.
Yeah. So how about this?
What inspires you to be the best parent that you can be?
Oh yeah. That's, uh, back to Jesus. Yeah.
Jesus, full stop. You know, he calls me his child.
Um, he's the maker of the universe. Um, he loves me.
He withholds no good thing from me that I need.
And, um, and I suck you. Right. You know what I mean?
I, I suck. I know where my heart is at times
and I know that I have a tendency to wander
and he rails me back in and still loves me the same.
That is my model for my kids. My kids at times will suck.
My wife at times will suck. I absolutely suck.
But there is grace and there's love for each other,
and that just solves all the problems.
A you learn why you sucked
because you can have a communication about it
and you receive forgiveness,
and that just brings it to a full head.
So yeah. Grace and Jesus all day long. Yeah.
Any, uh, any last words of encouragement
that you'd pass along to our listeners in the idea
of how to balance this stuff?
Um, Yeah, I, I,
I, I, I, I think about everything we've said so far,
it's so not practical.
Like it's so, It's so deep dive
into you at your, in your soul as a whole.
But, uh, ultimately if you're a parent that's struggling
with the busyness, you know, there was never any sort
of book that gave us the ones
and twos of how to be a parent.
So you gotta give yourself grace, right.
You have to be okay making mistakes.
You have to own the mistakes
and say, oh, I was mean yesterday.
'cause I didn't wanna be around you kids
who were pulling on my shirt and wanting all my time.
And I apologize.
They grow more from you being honest about
that than being this so-called perfect parent all day long.
Yeah. So be real upfront and open and give yourself grace
Right home. Yeah. I appreciate
that. Absolutely.
Thank you for the words. Uh, hey, we try to do this
with each of our guests, at least ask, you know, one
or two questions on the way out.
Let them see a little bit more into who you are.
So, uh, big question here for you, for our listeners.
Um, what are you the most hopeful
for in your life right now?
Um, I am the most hopeful for my family.
You know, I'm, I'm excited to see where my kids are going.
I wasn't a good kid when I was growing up, so
to have good kids is such a blessing.
And, um, I'm excited to see where my kids go. Are
Future, are there good kids in southern California?
There are, there are some. There are some. Good. Okay. Greg
Glory had good Kids, kids. I'm
just kidding. There's great Greg Gloria.
Um, kids, he would probably some my best
friends are from Southern California. Yeah.
So excited to see my kids and where they end up.
Ones in UNCG and she's thriving over there, big artisan.
So I'm excited to see where God sent her. So,
Yeah. Right on.
Well, um, Brian, I so appreciate your time here.
Absolutely. I mean, thank you again for the way that you,
me, the community, thank you even for me,
for spending some time like, hey, we can get practical
and we'll continue to look for practical ways Mm-Hmm.
On this show through different episodes.
But man, just the high level of what is your measure
of success and, and how can you be present in the moments
that's right with your family.
And I loved what you said about making sure
that our children know that they're loved, that they're safe
and they can communicate their feelings.
That's right. And so, to that end, man, may we continue
to labor on and try to find hope in these areas.
Absolutely. Uh, of our lives. To our listeners,
thank you all for tuning in with us.
If you think that this content is valuable, uh,
for somebody else that you might know, please, please,
please, uh, pass this along, share it with them.
You never know how much hope they might need
and how much hope this could actually provide.
And then if you do live in the triangle area,
we will make sure that we've got, uh, some links
and some info to the Muse Coffee Shop, uh, down in Garner
and who knows, even in Virginia.
'cause I'm sure some of our listeners
are up that way as well.
Appreciate you guys tuning in, and we'll see you next time.
Brian, thanks for being with us. All right. Thanks
For having me. This is great.
Thanks for tuning into this episode
of The Hope in Real Life podcast.
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