Sisters In Sobriety

Hey there! Welcome to our Sober Dating Series—Swipe Smart! In this episode, we’re talking about Five Ways to Tell if Your Match is Sober Friendly Before the First Date. Dating can be tricky, especially when you're navigating the world of sobriety. But don't worry, we've got you covered! Whether you're tired of swiping on profiles that treat whiskey like a personality trait or you're unsure how to spot someone who's truly respectful of your sober lifestyle, this episode is packed with valuable tips to help you filter through potential matches.

We'll guide you through:
  1. Spotting red flags in their bio (hint: if they talk about alcohol like it's a hobby, swipe left).
  2. Understanding what their relationship with alcohol might be, based on key phrases like "sometimes" vs. "hard yes."
  3. Decoding their photos—because if every picture includes a drink, you might be dating a cocktail, not a person.
  4. Recognizing date ideas that scream "I love alcohol!" (like a vineyard tour) vs. ones that align with your sober values.
  5. Trusting your gut when something feels off—it’s your secret superpower in sober dating.
This episode is a must-watch for anyone who’s navigating the dating scene without alcohol and looking to find a match who truly respects their lifestyle. We’re here to help you swipe smarter, so you can find love that doesn’t require liquid courage!
 
If you found these tips helpful, make sure to like, comment with your favorite dating tip, and subscribe to our channel for more episodes in our Sober Dating Series! And don't forget to share this episode with someone who’s navigating the sober dating world too!

Links

What is Sisters In Sobriety?

You know that sinking feeling when you wake up with a hangover and think: “I’m never doing this again”? We’ve all been there. But what happens when you follow through? Sonia Kahlon and Kathleen Killen can tell you, because they did it! They went from sisters-in-law, to Sisters in Sobriety.

In this podcast, Sonia and Kathleen invite you into their world, as they navigate the ups and downs of sobriety, explore stories of personal growth and share their journey of wellness and recovery.

Get ready for some real, honest conversations about sobriety, addiction, and everything in between. Episodes will cover topics such as: reaching emotional sobriety, how to make the decision to get sober, adopting a more mindful lifestyle, socializing without alcohol, and much more.

Whether you’re sober-curious, seeking inspiration and self-care through sobriety, or embracing the alcohol-free lifestyle already… Tune in for a weekly dose of vulnerability, mutual support and much needed comic relief. Together, let’s celebrate the transformative power of sisterhood in substance recovery!

Kathleen Killen is a registered psychotherapist (qualifying) and certified coach based in Ontario, Canada. Her practice is centered on relational therapy and she specializes in couples and working with individuals who are navigating their personal relationships.

Having been through many life transitions herself, Kathleen has made it her mission to help others find the support and communication they need in their closest relationships. To find out more about Kathleen’s work, check out her website.

Sonia Kahlon is a recovery coach and former addict. She grappled with high-functioning alcohol use disorder throughout her life, before getting sober in 2016. Sonia is now the founder of EverBlume, a digital tool that offers a unique approach to alcohol recovery support.

Over the last five years, she has appeared on successful sobriety platforms, such as the Story Exchange, the Sobriety Diaries podcast and the Sober Curator, to tell her story of empowerment and addiction recovery, discuss health and midlife sobriety, and share how she is thriving without alcohol.

Her online platform EverBlume launched in February 2023, and was featured in Recovery Today Magazine and deemed an ‘essential sobriety resource’ by the FemTech Insider.
The company champions self-improvement and mindful sobriety, with support groups designed by and for women struggling with alcohol.

So how can EverBlume help you meet your sober community? By offering deeply personalized support. Members get matched based on their profiles and life experiences, and take part in small group sessions (max. 16 people). In your support group, you will meet like-minded women, discuss your experiences, and gain confidence, knowing you can rely on your peers in times of need.

Whether you identify as a binge drinker, someone who developed a habit during the Covid-19 pandemic, a high-functioning alcoholic, or an anxious person using alcohol to self-soothe… There is a support group for you!

Current EverBlume members have praised the company’s unique approach to alcohol detox. “No one is judging me for not being sure I want to be sober for the rest of my life” ; “I felt so heard and understood and today I woke up feeling empowered to make the change in my life”.

Feeling inspired? Learn more about the EverBlume sobriety community at joineverblume.com, or simply listen to Sisters In Sobriety.

Your sobriety success story starts today, with Kathleen and Sonia. Just press play!

[00:00:00] Hi, all. This is part of our Stober dating series and welcome to swipe smart. [00:01:00] Five ways to tell if your match is sober friendly before the first date. We also have an episode titled love on bottled. about dating without drinking or Kathleen. And I chat about what dating looks like when you're sober. How you can find true love without liquid courage and how you handle a date at a bar.

[00:01:18] And then we sprinkle in some great stories and practical advice. So swipe smart, five ways to tell if your match is sober friendly before the first date. Because life is too short to date. Someone who thinks whiskey tasting counts as a hobby. All right. So dating apps,

[00:01:35] The buffet of modern love you swipe left.

[00:01:38] You swipe right in once in a while you swipe so hard, you almost break your thumb. Convinced your soulmate is finally within a 10 mile radius, but wait. What's that lurking in their profile. Oh no. Favorite drink whiskey. Neat. So for those of us who have traded cocktails for kombucha and hangovers for feelings, [00:02:00] dating can be tricky, but fear not. we have navigated these waters for you. And we're here to help you figure out if that Hottie with a hiking pick is going to respect your sparkling water lifestyle. Or if they're just waiting for happy hour to start. So number one, the bio, do they talk about alcohol?

[00:02:18] Like it's a personality, you know exactly what I'm talking about. There are bio reads. Like they are auditioning for a beer commercial. Just a guy who loves cold brews, pub crawls, and Saturday nights at the local dive bar. Girl. If you took out all the references to alcohol, their bio would read. Just a guy who loves. Saturday nights. that's a whole lot of nothing. And I'm not saying they can't enjoy a drink, but if their entire personality revolves around it, the chances are, they are going to look at you sideways.

[00:02:49] When you ask for a Virgin Mohito on date one. So. Swipe left and save yourself the awkward. Why don't you drink conversation where they blink at you? Like you just said, you hate [00:03:00] puppies. Number two check for phrases, like a hard, yes. So. Love the limited lifestyle section on dating apps, where you're allowed to sum up your entire approach to alcohol in a single word. And ops give you options like yes, sometimes rarely, no, or sober. And here's the thing.

[00:03:19] If they've marked themselves as sometimes don't panic, that can actually be totally fine, depending on how they approach drinking and what your comfort zone is. It's the hard, yes. That might need a second glance. If somebody is a full-blown yes. When it comes to alcohol, that's when you want to pause and like raise an eyebrow and think maybe I should ask some more questions about what they like to do on a Saturday night. On the flip side, if they've gone so far to drop little gems, like sober, curious, or mocktail enthusiast. And their profile,

[00:03:51] You might've struck compatibility gold in that section. So the signs may be subtle, but in [00:04:00] a world where profiles are basically many resumes for love, every clue counts. Three look at their photos is every shot at a bar. I'm all for a well lit. Aesthetically pleasing Instagram or the photo,

[00:04:13] But If every picture is a class raised in a toast, you're probably dealing with someone who's more into their cocktails than conversation. And if their picture is literally just have a photo of a pint of beer. Well, you're not dating a person you're dating a drink. So swipe left and pour yourself

[00:04:31] A nice tall glass of no thank you. Number four, their ideal date sounds like a weekend at a winery. So when their ideal date involves vineyard tours, brewery tastings, or a night of dancing in tequila shots, you can pretty much guess where their priorities lie. Sure they could be fun and spontaneous, but only until the third margarita kicks in.

[00:04:51] And you're wondering if you're the designated driver or the therapist. Spoiler. You'll be both. swipe left on the let's get trashed and dance. Like [00:05:00] no one's watching profile unless you're really into carrying someone home who can't remember your name by the end of the night. Number five, trust your gut.

[00:05:09] Are you getting a, this person? Doesn't get it by. Here's the thing, Your intuition is like that best friend who knows what's up before you even do. If you're scrolling through someone's profile and you get that subtle, but strong feeling like ma. Trust it. Maybe they didn't explicitly say they're planning to shotgun beers every weekend, butSomething about the energy just screams.

[00:05:32] I'm not going to get this sober thing. So if your gut tells you, they may not respect your boundaries. Swipe left. You're not here to explain your life choices on every date. If someone can't vibe with you, sipping soda, water at a concert and still having a blast. And they're probably not your person. I trust that instinct, it's done the hard work of getting you this far.

[00:05:52] You don't need to babysit someone's bar tab and their expectations. So guysSwipe wisely. Finding [00:06:00] someone compatible with your sobriety doesn't mean you're doomed to a life of awkward. First dates spent explaining why you don't drink little patients and some Eagle eye detective work. Seriously. It is like a sport. You can find someone who appreciates that your best nights involve deep conversations, long walks and remembering everything you said the next morning. So go forth. Fellow sober.

[00:06:23] Daters Your soulmate is out there probably With a fridge full of LaCroix and an understanding nod. When you say I'll pass on the wine and if all else fails, you can just swipe right on someone with a dog.

[00:06:34] [00:07:00]