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In this episode, I’m joined by Kamalyn Kaur, a psychotherapist and mindset coach, who helps me break down imposter syndrome, how it shows up in your business, and she offers some tips for overcoming it.
Show Notes
There are so many women who feel like they’re dealing with imposter syndrome as new business owners. This negative mindset can limit your ability to be successful and grow as an entrepreneur. So we have to do something about it!
In this episode, I’m joined by Kamalyn Kaur, a psychotherapist and mindset coach, who works with people dealing with stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, and much more. Kamalyn helps me break down imposter syndrome, how it shows up in your business, and offers some tips for overcoming it.
Find Kamalyn Kaur in the Empower Her Mind Facebook community and on Instagram @KamalynKaurTherapist.
Resources
More on Khalida
Khalida DuBose is a business mentor specializing in sales strategy. As a previous crowdfunding coach, she supported more than a thousand crowdfunding campaigns and project creators in their quest to bring their dreams, passions, and ideas to the world. Now, she focuses on helping women of color who are early-stage online business owners as they navigate the entrepreneurial journey. For more information on Khalida, visit khalidadubose.com.
Follow Khalida on Instagram @khalida.dubose. You can email her at khalida@blackgirlbusinessbar.com.
The Black Girl Business Bar is produced by Zuri Berry (@ZMCPodcasts). Music by Vincent Tone and Die Hard Productions.
Creators & Guests
What is The Black Girl Business Bar?
The Black Girl Business Bar Podcast is for Black entrepreneurial women who crave practical information to implement in their businesses and careers. They want tips and tactics that work and they want on-the-go mentorship that will make a difference in their businesses, projects, and lives.
Hosted by business coach and crowdfunding expert Khalida DuBose, the Black Girl Business Bar is all about letting Black women know what's possible for them in their entrepreneurial journey.
Khalida DuBose: Hey, welcome to the Black Girl business Bar podcast. I'm your host, Khalida DuBose. This podcast is all about helping you as a woman of color, increase your sales, overcoming your mindset blocks and giving you the practical information that you need to thrive in your business and life.
Today, we're talking to Kamalyn Kaur, who is a professionally trained and experienced psychotherapist and mindset coach.
Kamalyn has spent 10 years working with people dealing with stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, and much more. As a coach, she works with female professionals and entrepreneurs to overcome stress and anxiety so that they can thrive. Welcome to the show.
Kamalyn Kaur: Thank you. Thanks so much for having me.
Khalida DuBose: Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. Thank you so much for first of all, responding to my inquiry to do this show. I think this is like such an important show for me. And I've been kind of hinting at it for my audience that I wanted to have a conversation around imposter syndrome. This whole like imposter syndrome phenomenon that everybody just kind of throws out there in the online space.
And they're like, oh, I'm experiencing imposter syndrome. In particular, I had multiple women, I'm talking like six or seven women get on sales calls with me just last month. And they were like, I'm experiencing imposter syndrome. And I was like, wait, what?
So I started doing all this research today, super deep dive, which is totally like me into what is imposter syndrome exactly. Are we using it correctly? Are we not? Like, what is it, how does it affect us? And so instead of trying to have this conversation in a solo cast, I was like, let me go get a professional. Let me get somebody who really works with this every single day. I'm sure I'm working with it with my clients as well, because I do.
Now that I know so much about it, I see it coming up and I can like really see the areas in which it affects women in their business. So, I just wanted to welcome you to the show and give a little bit of background on why this was such an important conversation for me to have.
And so I'm going to allow you to introduce yourself. Tell us a little bit about you first, before we get started.
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. Once again, so much Khalida for having me here. So like you said, I'm a psychotherapist and I am a mindset coach. So I specialize in helping women overcome stress, anxiety, over thinking, self limiting beliefs, all the things that hold them back from success and happiness in their lives.
So this is the kind of things that I work with, and these are the kinds of psychological issues that I work with as well. And what we do is we remove psychological barriers by giving clients mindset tips, mindset tools, mindset strategies to help them understand their current psychological state a lot better. Understand where it's coming from and then essentially overcome any barriers to their success and to their happiness.
Khalida DuBose: Brilliant. Brilliant. And I love it. I love it. So I think the question that is probably top of mind if somebody is listening to this and they're not very familiar with these terms or they also have been hearing it and thinking, what the heck is that, is what is imposter syndrome?
Could you tell us what it is? And then it's just kind of like give us some examples nutshell.
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah, of course. Yeah, of course. So imposter syndrome, you're right. As a word that's thrown around quite a lot. And a lot of people use it. And I think there is a question about whether people use it in the right way or not as well. So imposter syndrome is an experience, but it's also a psychological pattern that an individual has in which they doubt themselves.
They doubt their abilities, they doubt their skills, their competencies. And they question whether they're good enough, they question whether they're able to do the job that they're doing, they question, whether they are worth doing the job that they are doing. And essentially it results in a lot of self doubt, but also what it eventually does is it starts having people live a life in which they're constantly on edge and fearful of being called out or being found out to be a fraud.
That's usually the underlying feeling, I'm get caught. Are people are gonna find out, people are a bit of a phony. People are gonna think I'm a fraud. So that usually is an underpinning fear of imposter syndrome as well.
Khalida DuBose: Yeah.
So when a woman saying something like, if I sell this package, what if I don't, you know, what if I can't deliver on it, you know, what if she finds out that I'm not, what of my customer finds out that I'm not as qualified or I really can't help them the way that I said I could.
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah. And so that's exactly how it sounds. And it sounds like who am I to be giving advice on this? Or who am I to be called an expert in this particular area of work? Or who am I to be coaching this particular type of person, or I feel like my life is not a hundred percent or I'm not perfect in my own life.
So who am I to advise other people on how to live their life or give them advice on this particular subject matter? So is essentially what you're doing is, you're questioning yourself so much, and you're doubting your ability so much that you're stopping yourself from progressing forward and you're stopping yourself from moving forward in your career.
And this starts to show up in businesses in the sense of pricing strategy, people don't price their products or their services on the right scale. So they might undercharge people rather than charging them the right fee. Why? Because deep down inside, subconsciously, the individual believes that what they're providing isn't maybe of value or isn't worth the money that they're charging.
Or what will happen is sometimes Khalida people won't put up their prices. So they'll set a pricing strategy and then they'll stick to that pricing strategy for years when other people, their other counterparts might be putting the prices up, or they might be increasing their packages. That particular individual will say, but then what if I increase my prices and nobody buys it? What if people don't want to pay that little bit more for my services. Or what if I fail or what if I can't deliver what I'm promising to deliver? So this is what it begins to sound like.
Khalida DuBose: Right. You put it so perfectly, because that is exactly, exactly what you just said. That is exactly what I hear on phone calls. That is exactly what I hear when I'm sitting with clients and we're going over for like the third time, like why they shouldn't relower their price to where we had it, where it was when we, when I first met them. And we've gone through like all the reasons why this price needs to be raised, we've gone through all the value that they're providing.
And still somewhere along the line, it's like, well, maybe I should go backwards.
So I read, you know, in all my deep dive that this phenomenon actually affects more people than you might know.
So I've seen different things in online space. When I've been in Facebook groups, I've seen people say like, oh, you know, it doesn't affect as many people as they say, why does everybody think that they have an imposter syndrome? And then I've seen actual, like studies that say it affects up to 70% of people.
And if you're a woman or person of color, it could be even higher.
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah.
Khalida DuBose: So, why do you think in particular, because my audience is women of color, why do you think it affects women and women of color so, so greatly?
Kamalyn Kaur: Okay. So there's a number of factors for that. Say for example, imposter syndrome rates. So the, we have described it. So it is about your internal dialogue. And it's about yourself. Talk as into, and it's about your self worth. That's the way I've described it. So these are all internal mechanisms that are going on, but for a woman of color, there's also external factors to be considered as well.
So the first and the most obvious thing is that there might be a lack of role models in the workplace or in the businesses that these women are working in. So there might not be other people that they can look up to and think, oh, look, she's doing it so I can do it. Or the jobs that they're doing, it might be taken.
Those positions might be taken up with counterparts that are predominantly white, right. So do you see where you're not do not have a role model that you can look up to? So when you eventually are working towards a certain position, you would doubt whether you can make it there because you don't have anybody there that represents you or looks like you, or sounds like you, or comes across like you.
So the first thing could be a lack of role models. The second thing is sometimes what happens is you've got deeper societal issues as well, rooted into the impostor syndrome and as a result of that, these kinds of things. So let me start that sentence again. So there's deeper Richard societal issues. So what will happen as you are not just dealing with your internal dialogue or your self-talk, you're also dealing with things like say racism, racial biases, racial stereotypes, cultural biases, cultural differences as well.
All of these things, what they do is they make you question whether you can fit and whether you're just as good as the other person, whether you belong, whether you fit in. So if all of your life you're struggling to fit, or you're being told that you are not one of us or you don't belong, or there is no place here for you, do you see when you eventually get that position of power or you get that position that you want to be in, you are subconsciously already programmed, who are you to take this job? Like, who are you to do this job? Are you sure you can do this job? Right? So that dialogue then, which is constantly running in the background, it becomes a lot louder because you're getting closer to where you want to be. So that's the second reason why that will happen.
The third reason is, and this is one of the things that I actually see in a lot of women from south Asian backgrounds, right? So Indian backgrounds as well, which is the grew up in environment or the grow up in households where they're constantly told to silence their voice or not express an opinion or not voice what they want to say, or there's sometimes biases towards the boys in the family, as opposed to the girls. So boys are putting these pedestals and women are basically, you're just there to look after, clean after everybody else. So do you see where from a really young age, you learn to be there, but in the background. And you learn to not speak up or talk up or to express an opinion.
So then you end up in a position of power and you then will have issues with visibility and marketing and speaking up. Why? Because all your life you've been silenced and now you might have to do it for your career. But you don't know how to do it, or you subconsciously feel that it's wrong for you to start speaking up.
So that's another way in which it shows up in business then Khalida. So what will happen is people wouldn't market themselves, or they wouldn't be visible out there in the social media platforms. Not because they don't want to, but because all their life they've been told to just shush or quiet or don't draw too much attention to yourself.
So do you see how these things begin to factor in? And the other major thing I think for women of color can also be that your worth as a person, your recognition, your value as a person is not based in your career, but it's based on whether you're married and you have a family. So do you see where you, although you might be working towards a career and you might be working towards achieving things, nobody in your family or your immediate circles or your immediate networks will see that as a success or an opportunity. And they'll probably use that against you to say, well, that's taking you away from what you actually should be doing, which has maybe to have a family and settle down and get married.
So do you see there so many different factors there that are women of color or different culture will have to experience, which then adds to the imposter syndrome, which has already, maybe going on internally?
The other thing is, in some households, English is not your first language that's spoken. So you will probably speak the language of your pittance. So again, when you're starting off in school or formal education, you're already one step behind aren't you, because you're not having to learn the language as well as learn everything else that's going on in that situation or in that environment or in those circumstances as well.
So there are so many factors at play Khalida when it comes to women of color.
Khalida DuBose: Man that, I mean, you, you summed it up. When I'm encountering women, you know, and when I said, hey, I want to work with women. I think literally you just summed up like two months worth of content that I've written.
When I talk about like the visibility issues, why we can't speak. And sometimes it's so hard in marketing to even like pull these these pieces out. Right. Because they can be a little bit triggering for you as the marketer, knowing that you're talking to your other sisters of culture and color, and knowing that this is exactly what they're experiencing, this is what's going on.
So I want to just ask this question, do you see people sometimes misdiagnosing themselves or are they usually spot on with their diagnosis of having imposter syndrome.
Kamalyn Kaur: I think so. I think sometimes there can be a misdiagnosis cause people do this a lot with OCD or I've got OCD, I've got a C D no, you do not have all CD. You like to have a clean home. And that is it. Right? So OCD is where your actual day-to-day functioning is effected. And you cannot carry on with your day until you follow certain rituals and routines.
So do you see, I think there's so many buzzwords out there and people do misuse them. Okay, so let me start from scratch. So what will happen is like anything new that we do in our lives or any change is going to create feelings of nervousness, anticipation, a little bit of hesitation.
Khalida DuBose: Right.
Kamalyn Kaur: Whether you're making the right decision. You're going to cause that. What the human brain does. So the human brain has to do a bit of a risk assessment just in order to weigh everything up. And that's just the natural conditioning of the human brain. That's how it makes decisions because our brain is analytical.
So that is going to happen all the time anyway when you're starting something new or you push yourself out of your comfort zone. Imposter syndrome is basically all of that, but heightened, but also to the point where you will stop yourself from moving forward. So this is the difference between your normal reactions to change and imposter syndrome.
So imposter syndrome is at that point where you will physically, mentally and psychologically not take up opportunities and it will affect your day-to-day functioning. So you will maybe miss out on speaking opportunities, maybe not speak up in a room full of people. Maybe not speak up against your boundaries, being blurred in a professional setting.
Maybe not saying no to clients when you're working with them. Maybe you basically having an idea, but not putting it forward for the fear of being judged or for the fear of being questioned. Who are you like, what expertise do you have? So it actually stops you from moving forward. So that's the difference between normal anxieties and the imposter syndrome.
Khalida DuBose: Yeah. I think that's, that makes it a lot more clear kind of drawing that line and reminding people that yes, there's going to be a little bit of anxiety, anytime something's new, it can be uncomfortable. I always say uncomfortable is good. It lets us know we're kind of moving forward.
But what I really heard was like imposters, especially when they have to deal with, you know, as you said, all that, the external stuff, there's so much resistance, right? It's not uncomfortable in this only there's becomes like this resistance. And I can see where that resistance could come from.
If you grow up in a household where you're told, like don't speak. Right. Just be quiet, sit in the back, you know, don't talk. And then like on top of that, we're going to put the guides on the pedestal, you know, like this is men's work, women do this. Right. And then you get out in front of everybody and you're supposed to step into leadership.
Right. I'm going to mark it. I'm going to tell you how I can help you. I'm going to tell you that I have solutions for. And chances are the same people who taught you the first set of stuff are still in your life. They still have those beliefs, right? Cause we're talking about the belief system.
And then you're like, okay, I'm supposed to do this. And I think this is why we see so many people come to coaches because you get to this point where you need somebody to help you work through this. All of a sudden you're kind of waddling through quicksand. Right? At least that's how I felt.
I definitely experienced going through corporate America, going through school. I experienced that feeling of like, I would have great ideas. I'm 100% sure they were great ideas and I would speak up about them. And then I would be shut down.
And after so many times after so many little cuts like that, right. You just stopped speaking up. And inside. You internalize it, you start wondering am I smart enough? It doesn't seem like it. They never take my ideas, but they take this person's ideas.
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah.
Khalida DuBose: And I think what really kicked me out of that to figuring out like, no there's something going on here, was when my little sister started going through that in her corporate job. And I was
like, no, no, no, no, no, Cause she would be like,
I guess I don't have anything to say. Like every time I speak up, like they just kind of quiet me and I was like, it was like that trigger. That was like, nope, nope, this isn't right. And also I would, would literally use my ideas like six months later. Right.
Kamalyn Kaur: Oh, that's so frustrating. Isn't it?
Khalida DuBose: So not only is that frustrating, but then you're like, what the heck? But it was very hard to untangle that on my own because I wasn't sure how far down that rabbit hole of like self-doubt I was. So it was like really hard to untangle that. So, you mentioned wonderful examples of how that shows up in the workplace. Can you tell me, like, what are some ways that women can start to kind of untangle that and start to have healthier mindset practices so that they can move past that?
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah. Yeah. There are so many things that you can do, which I talk about all the time with my clients. But the three main things that I can say will change your outlook on everything, right, is the following three examples, I'm going to give.
So the first thing is come out of your own head. This is where you're reacting emotionally, you know?
So when you're in your head, you're reacting emotionally. So you're reacting.
Khalida DuBose: I love it. I love it.
Kamalyn Kaur: So you're reacting from a place of complete fear. You're reacting from a place of insecurity and you're lacking coming from a place of like complete lack of faith and trust in yourself. That is going to get you nowhere.
And all it's going to do is it's going to internalize your self doubt, is going to internalize your fears, and is going to internalize your insecurities and then you're going to silence yourself, which is what probably people want you to do. So you're literally just making their job a lot easier.
So the first thing is just stop, come out of your own head, and start looking at facts, start looking at evidence, and start looking at what is actually happening. Because when you see the facts and you see things happening, it's really hard to ignore the facts. Doesn't it? So start thinking rationally and logically, and the only way you're going to be able to think rationally and logically is by looking at what's going on around you instead of putting your head down and looking at the ground and internalizing everything.
So stop, look up, and look at what is going on around you. Any time you have a thought that is putting you down or any time you have a thought that tells you that you're not good enough or any time you have a person that tells you that you're not good enough, you ask yourself, how do I know that this is true? What proof and evidence do I have to prove that this is true? What proof and evidence do I have to prove that this is not true?
So when you start looking at the evidence and you think, hold on, I actually gave the idea six months ago, but it wasn't good enough, but no one, this person gives it six months later, all of a sudden it's good enough. Your brain will start to make sense of it because then you realize the problem is not you.
The problem is that other person that's not taking on board what you're saying. And when you start to look at facts and evidence, what happens is Khalida, you start to notice patterns. When you notice patterns, it becomes easier to break them then as well. But in order to do that, you need to actually stop living in your head and you need to start looking at words rather than, and words. So that's the first thing I would say. Any women out there, it has to do look at your environment, start keeping logs and diaries of things. If you think there's things that are seriously going wrong so that you can date and time, because what that will do is it may come in help for later on.
But the other thing, what will happen is when your brains sees things written in black and white, it starts to actually form concrete opinions about it, as opposed to just fleeting ideas in your head. So when the brain starts looking at, hold on this date, this happened, this happened, this happened. And then this happened, then the brain goes, no, I'm not imagining this.
This is actually happening. So that's the first thing I would actually recommend that any individual do that.
The second thing I would say is, think about somebody in your life that you're fiercely protective over and you absolutely love dearly, and it could be a sibling. It could be a partner, it could be a family member. It could be a friend, but pick one person that you have that complete protectiveness over. And what to do as any time you find yourself, doubting yourself, or putting yourself down, or you find yourself in a difficult situation, which you're questioning your self worth as a person, think about that person.
Imagine that person saying that about themselves and telling you that's how they feel, how would you respond to them? And what would you say to them wherever you go next, you're going to say to them and whatever way you're going to respond to them, you know, need to be telling yourself that.
Cause what I find more often than not is we will allow ourselves to be mistreated, but when a loved one comes up to us and says, is how I've been treated, you will feel that rage inside you where you think, hold on a minute, what the hell is going on here?
You will fight for them, whereas you may not fight for yourself. So what this exercise does is it gives you perspective, but it also reinforces maybe any doubts that you have in your head makes you look at things from a different angle. That's what it does. So if you think, no, I don't think it's me. I think there's something going on here around about me, or there's something externally going on or there's something going on in my family, it makes you pay attention to it rather than brushing it under the carpet and saying maybe I'm being too sensitive, maybe I'm over analyzing it. Maybe I'm overthinking it because these are the kinds of things we tell ourselves to avoid dealing with the issue.
So the second thing is, think of somebody that you love dearly, but the key is very protective it as well. And whenever you're going through a difficult time, imagine them saying that to you or speaking that way about themselves to you, how would you respond to them and what would you see?
And the third thing is. And this is the worst thing we all do. And I think we do it because of social media as well, do not compare yourself negatively to other
Khalida DuBose: Bravo Bravo.
Kamalyn Kaur: the time because she's just so much better at this. And she's in this position, she's earning so much money, but she's just so much more prettier and slimmer and more successful.
Those who she has got more worthwhile stuff to talk about. And you're like, no, that doesn't mean anything. But what we do with that, is we compare ourselves negatively to other people, put everybody on a pedestal, and then we compare ourselves in the sense that we're not good enough or worthy enough or valuable enough or intelligent enough as that person. I mean that's never going to cause you any good at all. Instead, what we do is we compare and then we disappear. So that just basically feeds into the imposter syndrome cycle as well.
Khalida DuBose: I I'm sorry, mic drop. Pick it up and drop it again. Like, no, no, no, no. You said those three tips were so beautiful. So I always ask people to give us mentorship for the episode. That was definitely the mentorship of this episode. And I love those tips so much because they so aligned with exactly how I feel.
It's like get outside of your head. I have like an exercise that I go through with some of my clients that's kind of the mantra once we go through the exercise for them to remember it is get into your body or stay in your body.
You know, staying in your body. And that's typically anytime I'm like out there thinking somebody's thinking something about me or trying to compare myself. It's like staying in your body. but I also loved when you're like, go find the evidence.
Right? So another thing that I do with clients, it's called evidence gathering and it's kind of on the opposite side of that, right. It's like, You have done so many wonderful things, but due to like your trauma, the environments that you're in, the stories that have been told to you, and that you're telling yourself, you have forgotten it.
And my theory is that people forget because they don't celebrate in the moment. They don't take the time to even acknowledge themselves in the moment. And so they've forgotten stuff. And so I make them go through these exercises where we're going back and we're remembering what we've done. You don't have to like go fix anything. Remember what you've done and then moving forward, we're going to celebrate those things. Because we, we need to celebrate ourselves first before anybody else. Oh, I'm sorry. She's the expert I'll stop. But I was like,
oh my God.
Kamalyn Kaur: No, but you're so right. But the other thing I think you can also do is ask your clients what success looks like to them, because a lot of people don't know what success looks like to them, especially if they're experiencing imposter syndrome as well.
And what would it feel like once they get there. So you will be surprised. So when I do this exercise with clients, Khalida, naturally people think, well, of course I'll be happy. Like I'll, I would love to be
Khalida DuBose: Right.
Kamalyn Kaur: I would be over the moon if I was like in that position. But when you start unpacking it with clients, they're actually scared of their own success.
They're scared of earning above a certain amount of money. They're scared of pricing, maybe a certain level, because it might draw too much attention to them. They might get like negative energy feeding back into them. They might draw too much attention from friends and family that they don't want to get the attention from.
Now, if you think about it, if you've got a subconscious mindsets that are telling you, it's not good to earn money or don't earn too much because bad things are going to start happening to you, you're limiting your own success at that point. And so this is what we call the glass ceiling effect, right?
So you don't see it, but you're capping your own success there. And this is where it's so important to start looking at facts and evidence, but also to start working on the subconscious blockages and barriers that hold you back. So you might not see them. But there's something there that's stopping you from moving forward. Because the voices in your head, it's not always them. Sometimes there's fears as well. There's like real deep rooted fears about being successful.
Khalida DuBose: Right. I agree with you on that so much. And it's like, it is also a similar exercise that I do asking people, like, what, with this, how do you want to feel?
Kamalyn Kaur: Hmm.
Khalida DuBose: desire? Right. Because I found that when I started doing exercises like that for myself, I feel like I'm crackling somewhere.
When I felt like when I started doing like that for myself, what started coming up you're right. Was fear. And instead of. Being fearful the fear and shoving it back down and say, okay, I'm not going to do the exercise. I started saying, okay, what does the fear of telling me? What is the fear of telling me?
Because it's an uncomfortable feeling? What does that fear telling me? And typically it was just telling me, like, you're worried that if you make this amount of money, you're going to have to work this amount. Right. Because I was in corporate jobs, right. Where I was making well over six figures. And then I had to work a lot, like we're talking to 80 hours.
So never wanting to go back to that lifestyle again, but also wanting to make multiple six figures in my business, right. And then I, with clients, a lot of times I'll see in particular with women who are married, they're afraid of what that's going to do to, to the relationship. Like a balance, you know, a shift of power. If they make a certain amount of money and he's only making this money. So I've seen, I've seen many iterations of that, you know?
Kamalyn Kaur: Yeah. Yeah. So it just shows up in so many different ways, doesn't it? And it takes place on a subconscious level. And until you ask yourself that question, so what is it about success or what is it about marketing or what is it about visibility or what is it about pricing that scares me? You actually don't really get to the bottom of it.
So you will convince yourself by using other examples, like, oh, I don't have the money for that right now. And I'm going to start marketing next year. Or I don't have the budget for that right now, but actually, is that entirely true? Or is there something else, a deeper rooted fear that's driving you? So that example that you gave about a woman not wanting to earn more than her husband.
Now, if that's there and she's got this fear about losing her relationship or her relationship falling apart, if she earns more than amount of money. Well, that's never going to allow her to get past a certain level of success then, is it because either she's going to do one of two things.
Either A she's going to stop and cap her own success or B she'll get successful and then she will self-sabotage so that she brings everything back down again and keep starting from scratch. And then you go round and round in the same cycles.
your subconscious brain, all it's really doing is it's just trying to look out for you because it thinks something bad is going to happen if you do X, Y, and Z. So if you can train your brain to think, well actually that's not going to happen. And this is where looking at facts and evidence is important because when you start looking at facts and evidence, you can then start to realize whether that actually the belief that you have is actually true or not.
Khalida DuBose: Right I love that. And I'm just going to encourage again my ladies who listen to this podcast. Please, please take some notes on this one. Everything that you have said here, I have found to be 150% true in my own life. So this has been, this conversation has given me life as they say.
Kamalyn Kaur: Oh,
Khalida DuBose: it was so validating. I'm like, yes, I believe that, you know. Yeah.
That's what I'm telling my clients. And it's really nice to hear, you know, from a psychotherapist, yes, this is what's happening, you know? This is what's going on. And like, you also were seeing these things with your clients. And their businesses as well.
So before we wrap up, tell me where is the best place women can find you if they want to know more about your work?
Kamalyn Kaur: Okay. So there's two places predominantly. So there's a Facebook and Instagram. So I have a Facebook online community called Empower Her Mind. So I'm sure that will come up in a Google search. So if you just put in Empower Her Mind or even a Facebook search, that community will come up. And then the second place is Instagram. And my Instagram handle is @KamalynKaurTherapist.
Khalida DuBose: Beautiful. And we will definitely have both of those in the show notes for everybody so that you can click on them directly.thank you so much for coming and having this wonderful, just life affirming for me, conversation on imposter syndrome, I was not sure how I was going to tackle the subject and I couldn't be more pleased with the information that you shared here today.
Kamalyn Kaur: Oh, thank you. Thanks so much for having me. It's been lovely being here and it is, it's such an important topic and I'm glad that you and people like yourself are talking about it because it holds so much value. And I think people need to know what the topic is about, but they also need to know how to overcome it as well, so that it doesn't keep holding them back from things and successes and experiences in their lives.
Khalida DuBose: Perfect. Thank you so much again.
All right, friends. Thank you so much for hanging out and listening to the black girl business bar podcast, and an extra special thank you to Kamalyn for joining us today and sharing her story and experience and all of her beautiful wisdom. If you haven't already hit that follow or subscribe button, so you never miss an episode.
And if you found today's episode helpful or had any aha moments I would love to hear from you reach out to me personally at khalida@blackgirlbusinessbar.com or tag, both of us on Instagram with all of your feedback. We're dropping episodes every Tuesday, and we can't wait to see you back then.