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Harley loses sleep over fast food corporate logos and reminisces about the time a thumb was found in the chili. Kevin reveals how l’il Wendy looooved to party, sings "We're not candy" and terrifies with the tale of the Tylenol scare. Harley fleas the market and flees from a shot. Also: When Animals Attack Austin!
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
For 25 years, Kevin Smith has tried to make his beardless, dickless twin of a daughter Harley laugh in real life. Now he does it every week on a podcast.
00:00:25
Speaker 1: You know how Reba McIntyre was the Colonel for Kentucky Fried Chicken for like a while.
00:00:31
Speaker 2: I miss must have missed that one.
00:00:33
Speaker 1: They're doing that campaign, We're like, we're gonna have used people as.
00:00:39
Speaker 3: Yeah, they did.
00:00:39
Speaker 1: I think Norm McDonald was one of them, Reba McIntyre.
00:00:44
Speaker 4: They did.
00:00:45
Speaker 3: They did a.
00:00:45
Speaker 1: Host of people as the colonel because the colonel, you know, it's fucking long ago died.
00:00:50
Speaker 3: Colonel died when I was a kid.
00:00:51
Speaker 2: The old man on the Kentucky Fried Chicken.
00:00:53
Speaker 1: Container, he was real that guy. Did you think he was a corporate logo?
00:00:57
Speaker 3: And that's it? Like somebody was like, I.
00:00:59
Speaker 2: Never really thought about it too much, right, I could. I never even ate Kentucky Fried Chicken.
00:01:05
Speaker 1: Well, number one, I guess that stands the reason. Number something fascinating to me because you did you grow up with commercials? Yeah, where where'd you watch commercials?
00:01:17
Speaker 2: Disney Channel and Nick But they were for like shoes with trambolines on them, ther Moon sand.
00:01:28
Speaker 1: It's like you were different they when we were kids in the seventies and eighties, Like they they didn't specifically if you watched a cartoon, they would specifically sell sugary cereal and kids toys too and stuff.
00:01:42
Speaker 3: But a lot of the programming that I.
00:01:44
Speaker 1: Watched, like oh yeah channels, there would be like, you know, fucking commercials Colore and.
00:01:52
Speaker 3: The Kernel and KFC.
00:01:54
Speaker 1: Like the Kernel was in a lot of commercials when I was a kid because he was still fucking he was still alive.
00:02:01
Speaker 2: Did he started?
00:02:02
Speaker 3: He was? He was. He's the colonel.
00:02:04
Speaker 2: He's the guy Chicken, Like.
00:02:07
Speaker 3: Ronald McDonald's not real. I mean, you know, he's real in.
00:02:11
Speaker 1: Our but but the Colonel was real. The Burger King also not real. This is a corporate logo. But the colonel.
00:02:26
Speaker 2: What about the what about which one?
00:02:30
Speaker 3: Who's there? Mascot?
00:02:32
Speaker 2: A crazy chicken? Was there one? Was there one chicken?
00:02:37
Speaker 3: They ever have a mascot?
00:02:40
Speaker 2: I don't think So it's.
00:02:41
Speaker 1: Is there an image on loco of a chicken that's like.
00:02:48
Speaker 3: Please?
00:02:52
Speaker 1: Like we believe in advertising, So our corver logo is going to have the fear of chicken shows just before it's slain for your dinner. That drives imagine knowing you're about to die.
00:03:07
Speaker 3: He fit to somebody else.
00:03:08
Speaker 1: Only to be shipped four hours later. That's the local differences. So that's why heart you can taste so delicious because the fear. And it's true, it's very true. The but Colonel Sanders was an actual dude.
00:03:27
Speaker 2: Sounds right. I believe you.
00:03:31
Speaker 1: Home, that's your BILLILL talk tonight and as you like, cadnight, good good night, puffs. He call you Quinn, goodnight, Quinn, Cannet connect you.
00:03:47
Speaker 3: Zoo.
00:03:52
Speaker 2: Did you know that Colonel Sanders? What hey, Papa.
00:04:03
Speaker 5: Sanders?
00:04:07
Speaker 2: What it's fifteen minutes after I said good night?
00:04:16
Speaker 3: It was false?
00:04:17
Speaker 2: Fifteen minutes of some island.
00:04:22
Speaker 3: Yeah?
00:04:26
Speaker 2: Did you know a man named news?
00:04:34
Speaker 5: Yeah?
00:04:35
Speaker 2: Why that's literally sometimes I'm just trying to talk to you.
00:04:45
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. What did you know how ocdonald is real?
00:04:52
Speaker 2: Ronald McDonald?
00:04:58
Speaker 1: You though?
00:05:00
Speaker 3: It isn't really fun.
00:05:02
Speaker 1: It's sound like the fuck is your Why are we talking about faster and spokesman?
00:05:08
Speaker 3: This late at night?
00:05:09
Speaker 1: You know what's happening.
00:05:19
Speaker 2: They don't just die. You don't kid, you don't care.
00:05:28
Speaker 1: Abow bro. When you've been married for twenty five years, you will have fights like that where it's just like wild fighting.
00:05:39
Speaker 2: I have had a fight like that, had a fight like that too.
00:05:49
Speaker 5: To you awake, No, I'll see ye's Oh yes, teeth do you think the chicken and Loco is scared. What do you mean the chicken like all the chicken in the store. You know the chicken in the loco?
00:06:15
Speaker 3: Who is it with you?
00:06:16
Speaker 1: A corn mascots tonight? I don't know driving, but I.
00:06:35
Speaker 2: Can't sleep at less I talk about it? Whose back?
00:06:44
Speaker 6: I king.
00:06:50
Speaker 2: Wants to go from one dow?
00:06:59
Speaker 3: What quick?
00:07:00
Speaker 5: And do you think Wendy is Wendy from Wendy's because she was a little girl when the Hamburger was square?
00:07:14
Speaker 2: Was square? That's what they were famous for, square Hamburgers. Do you want to talk about a really dark story of our neighborhood? Yeah, speaking of what is Wendy's.
00:07:29
Speaker 7: You don't know what I'm going to say in our neighborhood people people Mom thinks this is a is a conspiracy theory.
00:07:40
Speaker 2: But I swear I recall so clearly that a Wendy's not far from this house someone found in their chili a human thumb. I didn't he swear, I remember it so figured out. I remember it somehow, don't you don't want to I want to believe it. I want to keep telling people.
00:08:11
Speaker 1: I want to believe in the world where there's a fucking thumb in chilis that came from Wendy's.
00:08:17
Speaker 2: Because that's why I'm vegan.
00:08:19
Speaker 1: I won't need a person.
00:08:20
Speaker 5: I won't do it. Would you.
00:08:26
Speaker 3: Why?
00:08:28
Speaker 2: Because sometimes they bendy that far from my house.
00:08:33
Speaker 1: It happened there was a case of somebody with something in their fucking fast food chili, But I don't think it happened near us like they would have closed it. That wants still open.
00:08:51
Speaker 7: I think it's still operating. I think they brushed under the rug. Not if we're talking about it, because I continue to suppread them not getting the worried out. But will you hang leaflets with me tomorrow?
00:09:06
Speaker 3: For what?
00:09:06
Speaker 5: Did you know that one time I got to shut down the Wendy's.
00:09:12
Speaker 3: That's why I asked.
00:09:13
Speaker 5: You think she's in her seventies and I think she's had enough.
00:09:17
Speaker 2: I just want to know if she I don't want to put her through that. If she's in her old age, I don't want to have to put her through that. That scandal that someone found a thumb in her chili. Wendy, Yeah, Wendy, she didn't create the restaurant. Well, I believe you embarrass her like that if she's an old person.
00:09:40
Speaker 5: I think.
00:09:43
Speaker 3: I'd you know, look, her parents created Wendy's.
00:09:49
Speaker 1: No, yeah, no it was her.
00:09:51
Speaker 3: It was not.
00:09:52
Speaker 2: No, it was her.
00:09:53
Speaker 3: It was not it was her. No, I know this sort of fact.
00:09:56
Speaker 1: It was created in Ohio in nineteen seventy to and they were known for the Square Halm Murder. It was created by a man who named it after his daughter.
00:10:09
Speaker 2: I think the seven year old child started it and put thumbs in chili. Nope, and put thumbs in the hamburgers. That's why there was square.
00:10:16
Speaker 3: No, you just don't want to face the fact that Wendy is a neo baby.
00:10:27
Speaker 1: You always find Wendy hanging out the fucking Spider Club, fucking abalon.
00:10:34
Speaker 2: I don't care you bring that term.
00:10:36
Speaker 3: Where do people hang out? What are the worst people hang out?
00:10:39
Speaker 2: And the worst people?
00:10:40
Speaker 1: Yeah, like where are the influencers going? Like soho house, so whole house? No, there are a lot of that anymore.
00:11:00
Speaker 2: Yeah, people do that.
00:11:02
Speaker 3: So what I mean she do you know her parasopans?
00:11:06
Speaker 2: No, I've never heard of her.
00:11:10
Speaker 1: Where would somebody, like a modern day parasitean go be like this this hot Delilah?
00:11:16
Speaker 3: What's Delilah? Like?
00:11:17
Speaker 2: I've never been but it's a club, all right.
00:11:20
Speaker 1: Wendy, who would go to Delilah's every fucking night, just fucking when she was seven years old. Yeah, that's how fast Weddy used to go up.
00:11:31
Speaker 6: She was like, my dad is, Oh my god, I've never seen you haburger, Like, is it round?
00:11:48
Speaker 2: I didn't know your face could do that. Oh my god, it's scary.
00:11:53
Speaker 8: That was like.
00:11:55
Speaker 2: Teenage girl possessed you.
00:11:57
Speaker 1: Father made the square fucking haburger respect.
00:12:01
Speaker 2: Oh my god, the seven year old.
00:12:04
Speaker 1: Someone get me a frusty Wendy. There was a time in this country where you could just be like, are you know Hamburgers around this fucker square? And everyone was like wow in that?
00:12:18
Speaker 3: And she because he did.
00:12:21
Speaker 1: She never had to fucking work a day in her life, chose a side, even have my fridays?
00:12:28
Speaker 3: Do you want pickles with that? Hey, everybody, let's get to Wendy's. It's on May.
00:12:40
Speaker 2: Oh my god, it's scary when you do that.
00:12:43
Speaker 3: Everyone's like, I hate her so much, but I love Free Winters. That's good.
00:12:48
Speaker 1: You rock, Wendy, Like, why are we? Why are we teenagers hanging out with a seven year old drunk? Seven year old drunk with power drunk with liquor because the fucking fronts are good.
00:13:01
Speaker 3: This one.
00:13:02
Speaker 2: I hate Wendy.
00:13:03
Speaker 9: He wants a square burger. I hateburger. Square fucking burgers. Were all of my friends bitches cook day.
00:13:16
Speaker 1: They're like, we hate Wendy comes in hate when when he comes in at like midnight, two in the morning with all our drunk friends. It's real weird. They're in their twenties and she's seven. Starts bargain orders and ship Wendy, you don't hate. It's my feelings when I'm making like twenty fucking square burgers at two in the morning while somebody tells me I'm a fucking jerk and so faster and shit and do you know how much I'm worth?
00:13:44
Speaker 3: And do you know who my dad? Do you know what my day?
00:13:48
Speaker 1: My name's on the restaurant, Like the whole time she's talking to me while I cook, I swear I just want to put my head in the fryar.
00:13:55
Speaker 2: And she's seven years old.
00:14:00
Speaker 3: After that she became religious.
00:14:01
Speaker 2: We haven't heard from her after that.
00:14:03
Speaker 1: She was like she went for been like, hey, who has it got fucking squire Berger to like, have you heard the good news about Jesus Christ. She has.
00:14:10
Speaker 3: She was like, I'd like to share my Bible with you.
00:14:16
Speaker 2: Wendy. Cinnamon and I just had our nine year anniversaries.
00:14:22
Speaker 3: That what it is. And Cinnamon came to you already like grown, right, and when.
00:14:26
Speaker 2: I Cinnamon is a rabbit. Also for those who when I adopted Cinnamon, the shelter said she was two, But I don't know how they would have known, because she was surrendered to the shelter like already as an adult rabbit.
00:14:46
Speaker 3: And was she she had like an injured year.
00:14:49
Speaker 2: Yeah, she was surrendered from a hoarder or she was saved from a hoarding situation. It was someone had a hundred other rabbits and her ear was and in a half and she had a bunch of metal stitches all over her body.
00:15:05
Speaker 1: Oh my god, like the fucking Bunny and Guardians of the Galaxy three. You still haven't seen it, have you?
00:15:11
Speaker 3: No?
00:15:11
Speaker 10: I can't.
00:15:12
Speaker 1: I can't, Yeah, because if.
00:15:13
Speaker 3: You had seen it, you would have been.
00:15:15
Speaker 2: Like, oh my god, Oh I can't.
00:15:19
Speaker 1: I can't do it.
00:15:20
Speaker 3: I can't.
00:15:21
Speaker 2: It is it's quite I'm so grateful that it exists in that he did that.
00:15:28
Speaker 1: But you're like, I can't but I can't.
00:15:35
Speaker 3: Do. This is a little story about how we got here. Kids.
00:15:40
Speaker 1: Ready, This little story begins, like all good little stories. Earlier in the week, on a Wednesday.
00:15:50
Speaker 5: How do you record tomorrow?
00:15:53
Speaker 4: I was like, where the hell are you going for Saturday?
00:15:56
Speaker 1: All right? All right?
00:15:58
Speaker 3: Yes?
00:15:59
Speaker 5: Which when?
00:16:01
Speaker 1: Well tomorrow night?
00:16:04
Speaker 2: Oh are you reading?
00:16:06
Speaker 1: That was the six fifty five pm at night, five thirty five pm. The next day, it's.
00:16:15
Speaker 5: Am it possible to do mamily after dinner tomorrow?
00:16:21
Speaker 1: You canceled on that one totally. That was you, bro. Then also you say that night an hour later, okay, cool, Sorry, we gotta started on music, like five hours late. Music is my life. And I said, oh my god, no worries. And then side note, I think puff got a car. A whole different story I heard. And then yesterday at well, we went out to a family dinner and we were going to record momily.
00:16:52
Speaker 10: After and then you said, let's do Saturday.
00:16:56
Speaker 1: Well I said, we could do. We could do either tonight or we could do Saturday. And you no judgment, but like you seized on Saturday, like someone in the desert who has offered a droplet of water.
00:17:07
Speaker 3: You looked at that.
00:17:08
Speaker 2: I know that it's not true.
00:17:10
Speaker 10: You said let's do tomorrow.
00:17:12
Speaker 1: Some stuff to do.
00:17:13
Speaker 10: You said let's do tomorrow.
00:17:14
Speaker 1: That was your choice then. Anyways, yesterday, at nine to fifty one pm at night, a plan was made like well the between eleven and one quarter of eleven and one Harley said, so at nine to fifty one pm last night, while I was already like sleeping because I go to bed at eight o'clock, we and you kept going to a show. Can we do three or four tomorrow?
00:17:41
Speaker 5: Quickly? I faith?
00:17:43
Speaker 1: What show did you wind up going to?
00:17:45
Speaker 11: I have.
00:17:48
Speaker 8: I have some comments to make, but I went to a slothrust show. May make my comments, Okay. I just want to say I feel a freedom to be my true self with timing. You're allowed to be late with me because I because I am this way because of you. So I just feel like I can truly be because I'm a late person.
00:18:15
Speaker 10: And it sucks.
00:18:16
Speaker 1: Who taught you how to use these drugs? You did die? Literally? Yeah, who taught you how to be late?
00:18:25
Speaker 3: Never mind?
00:18:25
Speaker 10: It was literally.
00:18:28
Speaker 3: Here.
00:18:30
Speaker 1: I don't even blame myself. You know who I blame, Mamally that's right.
00:18:37
Speaker 3: Now.
00:18:37
Speaker 1: Momily gets very insulted when you say that, she's like, you're your own person.
00:18:40
Speaker 3: I was always. But as much as I love Mommily, you know.
00:18:45
Speaker 1: You ask people give me ten words describe Momily. Chances are one of them.
00:18:54
Speaker 3: Is going to be late. But that's not criticism.
00:18:58
Speaker 10: That's just a I'm just only this way because.
00:19:03
Speaker 1: I'm just as God made me so because God made me this way, I'm just just smart made me.
00:19:10
Speaker 3: Sir.
00:19:11
Speaker 1: You taught me I did to be late.
00:19:14
Speaker 3: I did.
00:19:14
Speaker 1: I was like, you know, who's times valuable in this life?
00:19:19
Speaker 3: Now?
00:19:21
Speaker 10: It's so awful. It's something I truly bird oh.
00:19:25
Speaker 1: Mys like, I know a thing or two about lateness, Move forward, have joy. There you go. That's the best fucking advice I can give you in this life.
00:19:32
Speaker 2: I can try.
00:19:33
Speaker 12: I try.
00:19:33
Speaker 1: I stole that from Malcolm.
00:19:37
Speaker 10: I try with every single other person. I just feel like with you, I don't have.
00:19:43
Speaker 8: To put that effort in because I can be I can just live my truth.
00:19:49
Speaker 10: My damn no, it's it feels safe.
00:19:54
Speaker 1: That was at nine point fifty last night. Then today at ten forty six am, she said hello, and I said hi, I didn't want to wake you. She said, I can also do one, and I said yes. She said what time is.
00:20:09
Speaker 5: Better for you?
00:20:10
Speaker 1: I said, your call either or, and then she says, I hate this. How about I shower and then come to you, probably at four? And I said, yeah, that's that fucking that'll work A four to twenty six.
00:20:29
Speaker 3: I wrote you okay, and she wrote.
00:20:32
Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry, we're just about to text you. I'm leaving in five. That was a four to twenty seven. Then I got to follow up text twenty minutes later four forty seven. I'm hey, Now, this may rattle others, but as the girl pointed out, I'm like, this is this amateur hour compared to the fucking bullshit I've been late four and whatnot.
00:20:58
Speaker 8: So yes, I know, I kind of had a feeling that this would be a topic that we might be I realized I did really like push it.
00:21:07
Speaker 1: Honestly, I pushed it.
00:21:09
Speaker 10: I pushed it.
00:21:11
Speaker 1: It's I'm not saying you did and you should. Honestly, I was in the other room writing, creating a world where a store, writing a story where there was a daughter who respects her father, and it was well, I was reading a Jane Bob thing, which is fucking shocking.
00:21:30
Speaker 10: I was writing a story where a father taught his daughter good morals?
00:21:37
Speaker 3: Can I read this story?
00:21:40
Speaker 1: I read the story, drafter, you want how many pages?
00:21:42
Speaker 10: Six hundred and sixty six?
00:21:47
Speaker 13: Okay, this is serious. We can make you delirius. You should have the healthy fear of us. Too much of us is dangerous.
00:22:03
Speaker 3: What am I?
00:22:05
Speaker 2: Bro?
00:22:08
Speaker 8: You know the amount of songs you've sung to me on the show that I'm like, I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about.
00:22:15
Speaker 1: I will continue the song, and you see if you guess what I am. Doctors at the pharmacy. Pharmacy helped take care of you and me, You and me.
00:22:26
Speaker 10: Like a medical commercial from a commercial for children.
00:22:30
Speaker 3: I was a PSA for kids about.
00:22:33
Speaker 1: We're not candy even though we look so fine and dandy, because in the eighties kids were taking pills and overdosing because they thought they were like Eminem's. It happened enough times that they had to create a PSA, a public service announcement.
00:22:51
Speaker 5: I do know what that stands for?
00:22:53
Speaker 3: Did they have them in your world?
00:22:56
Speaker 11: Like?
00:22:58
Speaker 10: Yeah, yeah, oh shut I'm a little.
00:23:01
Speaker 1: Shi from that. You're receiving a lot of information this episode.
00:23:09
Speaker 3: You may need to call the therapist.
00:23:11
Speaker 2: And all of this after you're done just that therapy today, I wud have to wait a whole.
00:23:16
Speaker 3: Week to give a shout tomorrow.
00:23:21
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's crazy.
00:23:24
Speaker 10: Is that why they put locks on pill bottles?
00:23:27
Speaker 3: Yeah?
00:23:28
Speaker 1: Well why they put locks on pill bottles very specifically had to do with the tile and all poisoning case. So what happened was a bunch of people got terrified because somebody at the store bought a bottle of tile and all took the tail and all and died because somebody had put cyanide in the tile and all container. Because back then there was no childproof lock. All there was was there was no plastic that went around the rim, you know, for safety ceiling. That was all created because of this. So somebody opened up the pills, put cyanide in there, put the cotton back on top, closed it and put it on the fucking shelf. And they didn't know how many of these had happened, And so Thailand all instantly took every every tablet of thailan all off the shelves. Rather than fucking like risk a single other person dying, they pulled all their product instantly, a massive fucking recall in a span of three days beginning September twenty ninth, nineteen eighty two, seven people, including a twelve year old girl who took Cyanide lace thilan All in the Chicago area died, triggering a.
00:24:46
Speaker 3: Nationwide recall of the product.
00:24:49
Speaker 1: The poisonings led to the adoption of the tamper proof packaging for over the counter medications.
00:24:58
Speaker 3: Man, well, fuck, what went on a journey?
00:25:00
Speaker 2: What a sad sad mamily.
00:25:05
Speaker 8: One time when Austin and I were living in Dallas, this is one of the top moments of my life.
00:25:12
Speaker 1: Top moments of your life? Yep, yep, here we go. Get ready, I'm embracing.
00:25:20
Speaker 8: One time, as was taking a ship and moves on the back of the toilet and move fell off the back of the toilet onto Austin's back and claude is back open into Austin.
00:25:36
Speaker 10: Austin, this is something kind was mid poop and he moved fucking cut open his back with all his claws. So Austin fucking popped off the toilet, ship on the ground.
00:25:58
Speaker 13: To do that, and.
00:26:01
Speaker 10: So ship on the floor with a cut open back by move.
00:26:05
Speaker 1: All caused by the cat all cows b MoU surprise your.
00:26:10
Speaker 8: Relationship survived that well that I also had the pleasure of witnessing that moment there in the bathroom well.
00:26:19
Speaker 10: Out for the aftermath.
00:26:20
Speaker 3: It was like.
00:26:22
Speaker 1: For the aftermath, you heard it hit the floor.
00:26:27
Speaker 10: Yeah, basically, anyways, here's the top moment.
00:26:30
Speaker 1: Okay, because that wasn't it? Because that does sound like wasn't it?
00:26:34
Speaker 2: That was great?
00:26:35
Speaker 3: But no.
00:26:37
Speaker 8: So our place in Dallas had like a little tiny little courtyard that was fenced, and that was really small, but it had a door that you would walk through that was a part of the fence, and there was still a part of the fence above the door, if that makes any sense. And I was walking in front of Austin and I went through the door first, and then Austin was behind me.
00:27:04
Speaker 10: And when he walked through the door the fence.
00:27:12
Speaker 2: A rat Joe on his head.
00:27:17
Speaker 3: Fuck.
00:27:18
Speaker 10: He was wearing a hat bough and he didn't.
00:27:20
Speaker 1: Feel it and he wasn't even aware.
00:27:23
Speaker 8: No, I know, I was like, see that would have made me ship, And so I turned around to tell him something like oh but and I saw a rat. But I was truly stunned and speechless, so I didn't say anything for like fifteen sick because I didn't know.
00:27:43
Speaker 1: I feel like it's like gratitude.
00:27:45
Speaker 8: He was literally I was going to get it, cook me a meal, absolutely blown away, and.
00:27:52
Speaker 1: King cooks you. He's like, why are you saying that? Jesus?
00:27:55
Speaker 10: Basically Yeah.
00:27:57
Speaker 8: Then he realized, freaked out, took the hat off, the rat jumped off, then took all his clothes off outside and because he was scared.
00:28:09
Speaker 13: I don't know.
00:28:09
Speaker 10: There was a yeah, I don't know, and yeah, and that that was really good moment in my life.
00:28:17
Speaker 1: One of the top moments of your life.
00:28:18
Speaker 10: Just wanted to saw a rat on the puff's head?
00:28:21
Speaker 1: Bar is low the bar we can tell you.
00:28:31
Speaker 10: Yeah, do you want to know another story from Dallas? Really quick?
00:28:36
Speaker 8: Austin and I stayed in Dallas for the entire six months. I was filming Cruel summer. We only went to Austin.
00:28:43
Speaker 1: It was a cruel winter too. That was during the snow apocalypse, right, cruel as with a grid shut down. You were trapped in fucking freezing Texas. I didn't even know that was possible.
00:28:53
Speaker 8: All right, we lost power for a week, kind of stay in a hotel with them, and.
00:29:00
Speaker 14: What we're doing here, yeah, well we opened the door the room here, well.
00:29:15
Speaker 8: And the whole time, we didn't leave because in the middle of COVID it was scary. But then one time I had like a couple of days off, so we went to Austin, Texas for like twenty four hours.
00:29:25
Speaker 10: It was really fun. It was such a short lived ex just the.
00:29:29
Speaker 1: Two humans, just the two humans, the cats behind, yes, how many cats at this point.
00:29:33
Speaker 10: Only two plus a cinnamon okay, and my friend watched them.
00:29:40
Speaker 8: And while we were there we went shopping and purchased some really beautiful pottery and we came back saw MoU, saw Carl put our pottery down for one second, maybe went to the bathroom. Then all of a sudden, A had a fucking hurricane because Moo got his head stuck in the fucking handle of the.
00:30:07
Speaker 4: Pottery bag and fucking was streaming through his fucking condo like nobody's business, up and down the.
00:30:17
Speaker 2: Stairs with his bid.
00:30:18
Speaker 8: He could not he could not slow down or stop for one second so I could get the fucking bag off his head. So he ran around for like five fucking minutes until he caught so much speed that the bag, like the handle stayed on the bag, and all the he broke every single piece of pottery.
00:30:41
Speaker 1: It happened again because.
00:30:43
Speaker 10: The fucking move got his head stuck in a.
00:30:45
Speaker 15: Bite, not trapped in a bag again, only play don't bring home then.
00:30:51
Speaker 1: Mood trappers no more, it's not a bag. The mood trapper he trapped twice.
00:30:59
Speaker 3: We'll look at that man.
00:31:00
Speaker 1: You got some bonus move, some bonus bonus Zoo shares. It's like, why did you tell him? I pinched it on the phone.
00:31:10
Speaker 10: It was move's fall.
00:31:13
Speaker 15: Move pick it up, pick it up. I want to touch the tar, just some litter on top of all, kick it toward.
00:31:29
Speaker 10: So recently, crack up, open a cold waters.
00:31:39
Speaker 3: Get ready for this.
00:31:40
Speaker 1: Recently, you've discovered something that in my side of the family I can't speak for, well even for Mom's side of the family, is it's in the blood. But it's never really anything that you had to do or think about doing, or ever wanted to do, or ever knew maybe existed.
00:31:59
Speaker 10: And too, I don't want to talk about talk about it.
00:32:04
Speaker 1: It's told Mommily. Momily was so excited you did.
00:32:06
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:32:07
Speaker 1: Momily was like, oh, I sent her the pictures of your set.
00:32:10
Speaker 3: Well.
00:32:10
Speaker 1: First, for those who are like, what's going on? Harley started flea marketing like going to the flea market and stuff. And in our family, flea markets are like that was how we spent every weekend.
00:32:22
Speaker 3: You know.
00:32:22
Speaker 1: It was a queen at a flea market and Judy, Oh my god. When Judy heard that you were flea marketing and she saw the picture, it spread like wildfire back east where they were like, look how nice she did her booth, go thank you. The presentation was it was like I thought you were on a game show set. It was so well laid out.
00:32:44
Speaker 10: I take it seriously, you really did.
00:32:46
Speaker 1: Now where where does one flea market? And well, first off, are you going to go back because this is twice you've done it now?
00:32:53
Speaker 10: Hmmm. Well, here's the thing. I have a lot.
00:32:57
Speaker 1: I have a lot, a lot of stuff to sell.
00:33:01
Speaker 10: Yes, I collect vintage clothes.
00:33:04
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:33:04
Speaker 10: My favorite thing in the world to do is go shopping for vintage I just hit myself in the face shopping for vintage clothes.
00:33:15
Speaker 3: Did you.
00:33:17
Speaker 1: So, did you do that a flea markets or generally you go to venture Yeah?
00:33:21
Speaker 8: I do.
00:33:22
Speaker 10: I do frequent some flea markets.
00:33:24
Speaker 1: So you were very familiar with the concepts, which is never never as vendor.
00:33:29
Speaker 8: No, but as I'm trying to My house is very small and there is not a lot of room, and Austin has five percent of the closet as is, and so I'm trying to get rid of some stuff nice up cycle, Yes, upcycle, and I the opportunity came to flea market and I was like, yeah, that sounds so fun.
00:33:55
Speaker 1: And to be fair with that name names, you were flea marketing with somebody who like has done it before or having you were both virgins. Yes, we both might have wanted to ask someone's We.
00:34:07
Speaker 8: Both did not know what we were doing, my friend Emma and I the first round, we truly did not know.
00:34:13
Speaker 10: What we were doing. However, that booth said my booth looked very nice?
00:34:16
Speaker 1: Really did the booth was peak sales mid all right?
00:34:21
Speaker 8: Well, the first round, yes, I made I made a good amount of sales on not wait.
00:34:28
Speaker 1: And I know what you did in the first round. So if you're saying it like this, it kind of indicates that the second round didn't go as well. Second round, by the way, it was what yesterday? Yes, all right? So being a Friday up, Yeah, I don't know anybody goes flea marketing on a Friday. It's usually Saturday, and.
00:34:48
Speaker 8: You're right, nobody goes to marketing on Friday. People are at work and not at the silver like flea market.
00:34:59
Speaker 3: I will tell you, what did you show up for? A bright eyed, mushy tail.
00:35:03
Speaker 8: I showed up at night. I was supposed to be there at nine, but I showed up at nine thirty.
00:35:07
Speaker 1: What time is your first customer?
00:35:10
Speaker 10: Well, that's a complicated.
00:35:13
Speaker 1: I don't mean lucky Lou. I don't mean somebody going. This booth is really nicely set up a lot of people. I mean somebody was like, here's hardcore cash money, give me that pair of jeans.
00:35:28
Speaker 10: I may have not made any sales yesterday, zero dollars.
00:35:35
Speaker 8: I don't know.
00:35:36
Speaker 1: Actually somebody did buy something in the end, pity purchase negative forty five because you had to spend to get there on the table. Yeah, here's here's the.
00:35:49
Speaker 3: When one. You know.
00:35:50
Speaker 1: I think I saw in a text between you and me and Mom that you were like, I'm gonna go flea market. I was like on a Friday. I was like, maybe it's different than Los Angeles Saturday and Sunday or flea market day is number one? Yeah, number two? Why not just create a little store what on shop of fire or whatever? Fuck and then just tell these cats, hey, man, here's my store.
00:36:15
Speaker 8: Well, because I realized that it's fun to be on the opposite side of the vintage sales.
00:36:24
Speaker 1: Yeah, but just it's funner to make this sye.
00:36:27
Speaker 8: Okay, all right, Well you do have a point. And obviously was I a bit stung yesterday, Yes I was. I did not want to be sharing this information.
00:36:38
Speaker 1: But you about it next time. Next time, I'm gonna send you over with a box of pre rolls.
00:36:45
Speaker 10: Then I will be in business.
00:36:49
Speaker 1: Twenty bucks a pop. Man, you walk away at least eighteen thousand dollars.
00:37:00
Speaker 10: I will also be selling illegally what if.
00:37:05
Speaker 1: No, the way I look at it is weed's legal in California.
00:37:08
Speaker 8: So your advice from a father to a daughter, yeah, is to sell weed at the flea market.
00:37:16
Speaker 1: I mean no, all right, here's something better. Here's my better advice. Okay, next time you go, you tell me I have Nate build an ad Okay, that's like you know, a flea market, Yeah, lots of vintage clothing for sale with special guests Kevin space, Okay, and then I'm sitting there signing yeah. And so it draws people into the booth. So true, and then you.
00:37:50
Speaker 8: I want to know something, I would A family did come by to see me. They just didn't buy anything.
00:37:57
Speaker 1: So they came by to see you.
00:38:00
Speaker 12: Some stuff?
00:38:01
Speaker 1: Did they really did not. You would look at the clothes, so what they see it on your Instagram or something and they were like, oh, that's awesome. You didn't think to charge them the forty five dollars that would have covered the table.
00:38:15
Speaker 10: I couldn't. I couldn't bear. I couldn't. I couldn't do that.
00:38:20
Speaker 1: What will you go back? Is the big question?
00:38:23
Speaker 2: On a Friday?
00:38:24
Speaker 1: No, never on a Friday. Did you go on a Friday last night?
00:38:28
Speaker 3: No?
00:38:28
Speaker 8: I went on a Saturday, my mega sale day idayat the price the earnings, let's say it was.
00:38:40
Speaker 10: More than yesterday.
00:38:42
Speaker 1: Yeah, that that's true.
00:38:45
Speaker 9: And you know, yeah, why not?
00:38:51
Speaker 8: Olivia and I went, my best friends since I was four, and she crochets.
00:38:56
Speaker 1: Like, did she bring merch to South She's I'm gonna get fucking flea market, Rach. You guys both drove home like, well, at least the booth looked nice.
00:39:07
Speaker 10: Do you want to know something?
00:39:08
Speaker 11: Yeah, she made five she sold ship and you didn't ship crochet millionaires. What did she sell like sucking potholders or make sweaters?
00:39:26
Speaker 8: She can make truly anything with yarn or crocheng, Yeah whatever, crouscheng materials needles like one needle, right, I found out yesterday.
00:39:38
Speaker 1: That's the difference I'm taking a knitting.
00:39:39
Speaker 10: Knitting is too crocheg is one one she can make.
00:39:44
Speaker 8: She made little tops like bikini tops, She made skirts, she made choking necklaces.
00:39:50
Speaker 1: Like how they going to cover her nipple? Man, nipple pop out? I mean, think about it.
00:40:00
Speaker 8: Well, she makes bandanas, she makes little crochete bandanasm like little head pieces, little necklaces. She's made me bags, she made me She's made stuffed animals.
00:40:13
Speaker 1: How long is this should take to she can she can whip.
00:40:16
Speaker 10: Out anything in a day, right, well most things in a day.
00:40:20
Speaker 3: So what did she sell?
00:40:23
Speaker 10: She didn't.
00:40:24
Speaker 8: She did not actually sell her coach, though she sold or her her clothing.
00:40:31
Speaker 1: She also brought vintage clothing y clothing.
00:40:33
Speaker 8: But she said that she believes she made the sales because she was selling her items for.
00:40:39
Speaker 1: The cheap, where yours not for the cheap.
00:40:42
Speaker 10: Mine were not exactly for the cheap, per se.
00:40:45
Speaker 1: See that's where you got to put them online.
00:40:47
Speaker 8: But yeah, no, you're right, but there are some things that wow, yeah, fuck, I didn't.
00:40:57
Speaker 1: Have to work hard for that one. I took the kid to children's hospital and and Jim was like, she's got to get her shots, and I do everything you do this. I was like, all right, So I went to the children's hospital with the kids. I was like three three, and you know, we went into a blood drawing room and they put her in the chair, and naturally, all of it was kind of like hospital, even though it was Elie's children's hospital, so it was geared toward kids, it was still lab looking.
00:41:29
Speaker 10: This is this is making me already feel trigger.
00:41:33
Speaker 1: Oh my god, sitting there watching and I'm not big into having blood drawn, but like I've cronious to it over the years and stuff.
00:41:40
Speaker 3: So she.
00:41:45
Speaker 1: Got in and I don't I don't even know if they poked you before you started. I think they put you in the chair. She saw the needle, freaked the fuck out. Still, I feel like a howler. Monkey fucking shot out of the room past me and the nurse who's like, I've seen it all, and fucking went screaming into the hallway, and the saddest thing was you can go right or left.
00:42:10
Speaker 3: She went left if you want left.
00:42:12
Speaker 1: There were two doors that we were not going to open, so the kid had nowhere to go, and she was like a guest at the door, like.
00:42:20
Speaker 3: And then I had to fucking bring her back in the room.
00:42:23
Speaker 1: What a monster, I know. I'm like, oh my god, I never wanted to be this person, the responsible parents, the fun one, but oh my god, that was so horrifying. And yeah, it remains like a pretty high standard for like terror, you not my terror, yours. I've never seen a human being look that terrified in my entire life.
00:42:51
Speaker 8: If you came with me to get my blood drawn tomorrow, it would not be too dissimilar.
00:43:01
Speaker 12: Austin has to come with me and like hold me down so I don't fucking run.
00:43:06
Speaker 10: I don't know, I don't know what it is.
00:43:10
Speaker 2: My instinct is still the fucking run.
00:43:13
Speaker 1: Never been friends? Yeah, yeah, what what what is a young Hollywood up to these days? Let me check in is there some bulletin board?
00:43:27
Speaker 3: Ye?
00:43:29
Speaker 2: Check the shall we party website?
00:43:35
Speaker 1: Gee?
00:43:36
Speaker 2: I don't know.
00:43:38
Speaker 1: I mean it's it's Saturday night, almost seven o'clock, so clearly if there is a.
00:43:52
Speaker 12: Don't count on me being in it. I was also here last night, which was a Friday.
00:44:00
Speaker 3: It soun fuck all that, so rude, Mom and Dad.
00:44:08
Speaker 5: I'm here to party.
00:44:11
Speaker 12: You have many plans either, so these are your best plans to FUCKO.
00:44:18
Speaker 3: I love it, but I've had my chance. Man.
00:44:20
Speaker 1: I'm fifty three, like, I'm fucking past my prime, and shit, you're you're in those fucking like wonder years. And you're like, are you.
00:44:27
Speaker 12: Trying to make me feel bad about myself?
00:44:30
Speaker 1: Lucky and Bertie, Let's have a party Friday night?
00:44:33
Speaker 3: And I am here to like anything for a stick.
00:44:39
Speaker 5: Idn't think twenty four that one of my best friends would be my parents?
00:44:47
Speaker 3: He's like, what do you say?
00:44:51
Speaker 16: And I'm like, this has been a podcast production, some podcast podcast using our mouths on you since two thousand and seven.
00:45:17
Speaker 1: Hey kids, did you like what you just heard? Well, guess what.
00:45:19
Speaker 16: We've got tons more, man thousands of hours of podcasts waiting for you at that kevinsmithclub dot com.
00:45:26
Speaker 1: Go sign up now,