Torn between cultures

This episode explores the story of Juan Lopez, who is an American citizen that spent most of his life in Honduras. The conversation revolves around the idea of identity and how it shaped by the environment one grows up in, cultural attachments, and what it truly means to be an “American”.

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Creators & Guests

Host

Abdullah Najjar

What is Connecting the Pack?

"Connecting the Pack" is a podcast from WKNC 88.1 FM HD-1/HD-2 that allows international students to share their unique stories and how they have ended up studying at NC State.

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Alright. Welcome, everybody to another episode of connecting to pack. This is your host, Abdullah Najjar. And today I am joined by Juan Lopez Flores. Juan is a student here at NC State University studying business administration. And he is from Honduras or under USCIS. That's how it's yes, Spanish.

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Will today we will try to talk more about his journey here and estates, about life and estates, you know, studying at NC State University, and few other topics.

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That touch on, you know, culture, lifestyle, and

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the change in environment coming from obviously, Honduras, and transitioning to the states. This this something, it's I'm sure he's a major transition. So we'll try to explore that together in today's conversation. So without further ado, Juan, welcome to the studio. Thank you. So I guess, you know, the obvious question is always, you know,

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how is it that someone, say, from a foreign country? Or why is it someone from a foreign country decides to show up here to the States and pursue a college degree? So I'm interested to know, you know, your story and why you decided to transition from Honduras to the States? When did that start? And what sort of motivated you to show up to NC State University? So um, I think my story is kind of as an international story, as an international student is kind of different, because of the fact that I'm a US citizen. So I grew up in Honduras, like my entire life, but I was born in the US. Wow. So yeah, my mom used to live here in the US. So she, when she had me, I was here for like, maybe a year tops. And then we went back to Honduras, I grew up as a Honduran. Um, but the fact that I was born in the US

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really created this looming like idea that whenever I came of age, I would come to study to the yes, just because of, you know, educational reasons, like, of course, the education over here, it's a lot better than the education in Honduras, it would open a lot more doors, when it comes to job opportunities. Even just the quality of life over here would be a lot better. So it was just, it was kind of an unspoken decision between my parents. And later, as I grew up, I became part of that discussion, but it wasn't really, it never, it was never like my original decision. Like, it wasn't something that I was like, I want to go to the US, but it was rather like my parents were always like, you're gonna go to the US, and you're gonna leave Honduras, and you're gonna go study over there. Wow. So technically, you have this sort of background, you know, being being an American citizen, but living primarily outside of the United States. So you're kind of torn between two cultures in a sense? Oh, yeah. Yeah. So how did you, you know, over the years, how did you sort of deal with that, knowing that, well, I'm American, but I don't maybe feel that level of attachment to the US given that, um, I've lived abroad for most of my life, like, how do you think about that? Do you how do you, you know, you sort of gauge the subject in a way. Also, the funny thing about that is, whenever I was in Honduras, I always identified myself as an American, even though I knew virtually nothing about American culture. I was always like, No, I'm American guys trust. But now that I'm here in the US, I can identify myself more as 100. And I think that's just because

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of the things that we don't have, I guess, whenever we like, when whatever we don't have we want that. So whenever I was in, in the US, in Honduras, I just kind of grew up

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trying to get everything from American culture that I could like, for example, I would watch TV in English, or I would consume YouTube videos in English. listen to English music. I completely rejected a lot of like, the Hispanic music. Wow. Yeah, it was it was crazy, because, well, I kind of knew that I was coming to the US eventually, especially with my parents pushing it. So I figured that it was kind of pointless to engage with Honduras, which is something that completely changed. Like now that I'm in the US like, that's a completely story, different story. Like now I want to connect a lot more to my 100 background. But when I was growing up, it was something that I rejected a lot like I wouldn't.

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I didn't I didn't consider myself under and I would think a lot about

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what it meant to be an American, especially since I wasn't an American, like in the in the US, but rather in a different place. And especially since my parents were not American, because both of my parents are Honduran. So it was just such an interesting thing, because a lot of the people that I grew up around would always be like, no, he's he's American. Yeah, he's

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He, he's not from here, guys. And I, honestly, in the sense of the whole American identity, I wasn't really American, because everything that surrounded me was underwritten. So yeah, it was just like me hanging on to this identity. And I guess really trying really hard to.

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And this comes in with the conversation of what is the foreign perception of what America it looks like, like what Americans are and how they act, what they're supposed to do, the way that they engage with other people in other cultures. So I was basically like, playing an American in a different country. But yeah, but coming here to the US, I realized, like, I was really

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wow, I mean, this, this, this truly reminds me of the, you know, conversation I had on the podcast with someone from Mexico, but he, he lived abroad, most of his life. Like, you know, if you calculate the number of years that he spent abroad versus number of years that he spent in Mexico, you would find a he, most of his life wasn't even spent in Mexico. But, you know, and I have to ask him that question, you know, during the conversation, where I had, I need, I wanted to know how the level of attachment that he has to Mexico or his or his hometown, and for some reason that that connection was so strong, and he said, You know, I still identify as Mexican, I still consider myself Mexican. And that's like, the culture that I feel very much attached to, but for some reason, you know,

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but, you know, obviously, he lived abroad for many years. And still, he has that strong connection. You know, and and I would be interested to know, like, how,

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you know, especially when it comes to your case, you know, you've lived in Honduras for most of your life, but now you're here in the States, why do you think this this connection sprung out or sprung up? When you to Honduras when you showed up here, like, for some reason, now you say I'm Honduran? Or, you know, I feel more attached to it, even though when you were there, you weren't? Like what? At what point do you think that was triggered? That strong connection? I think it was mostly based on the experiences, and I'm not gonna call them struggles, but a lot of the circumstances that you're faced with as a Honduran here in the US? Yeah, um, because, um, I feel like once I got here, I started, I was really,

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I like to think about it as well, I don't like to think about it, it basically comes down to me living off as

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basically 100 an immigrant, despite the fact that I had a US citizenship. So it's just really interesting, the fact that, um, a lot of my experiences were those of Honduran immigrants, despite the fact that I was a US citizen, like I had all these. And of course, like, I got FAFSA, like, I got Medicaid, like, I got a lot of things that are inherent to only American citizens, so I'm better off than a lot of them. But still, like, I still had to do a lot of the things that are usually more considered, you know, are more attached to the immigrant experience. So I feel like coming here to the US was just me realizing that not that I was in an American, but rather that my, my background and the way in which I grew up, and even all the cultural things that I grew up doing, like for example, in Honduras, our physical touch is very encouraged like people hug people kiss each other on the cheek, whenever they see one another over here, people don't do that is true. And it's just, um, there's always this southern warm here in the south, like I've been up north, it's even worse, but I feel like Americans just have this sort of coldness towards each other. Like, I feel like whenever people say hi, they don't hug each other, they'll just wave. And that's just something that I didn't grow up with, you know, and that was just like, realizing that all of these experiences I had, when I was over there, of course, I saw them as like, I didn't see I didn't think of them as anything special. Like, I didn't think of them as anything noteworthy. But coming to a different country, I realized, you know, those are the things that I'm used to, those are the things that I grew up with. And those are the things I appreciate. Those are the values that were created within me because of where I grew up, you know, yeah, so a lot of the things that are valued here, not to say that I don't share those values, but at the same time, I do think that I do have a lot of

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I do appreciate a lot of things that are connected to my 100 background. That makes sense. So there's no one in the US. Yeah, yeah, I think I have, I've experienced something slightly similar where I spent,

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you know, a few few years

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and Lebanon proximately, three or four years. And in that culture, men, when whenever when they're greeting each other, they greet each other with, you know, a kiss on the cheek. You know, obviously the lips don't touch. But there's that element to it of physical connection. Yeah, you know, but when I transitioned obviously here to the States, I realized that man, it just, it feels so strange to me now that I can't really do that, right. And especially going into the conversation of the kind of relationships men have with each other here in America. I feel like they they're such a I'm not gonna say toxic masculinity, but there's just such a big

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focus on independence. And just America in general has such a massive of focus and independence, you know, and that's another thing that I appreciate back from Honduras, you know, there's such a

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group dynamic, you know, that I feel like I it's a lot harder to find here, you have to really work to get it. But um, yeah, I feel like I had fraternal relationships with some of my male friends back in Honduras that are kind of out of reach sometimes here just because of the cultural context, right? Yeah. Like you said, like, there's a lot of interactions that you're just not able to have, because that's just not normal. Yeah. Like a lot of people consider that really out of the ordinary. And they'll just be like, What are you doing? Right? And the strange part is, when you mentioned that to Americans, you're like, you know, that's how we do it back there. Yeah. They're like, Oh,

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yeah, right. Yeah. So that is one of those things, you know, the cultural shocks that I think some of us do experience when we show up here, you know, I don't think if someone from say maybe Western Europe showed up here, maybe that particular element wouldn't be as shocking as it would for, for me, you know, us countries where there is that into, like, sort of Platonic intimacy? Yeah, yeah. No, and I completely agree with that. Yeah. So that is, you know, a shocker to most people. But I would love to hear transition to maybe the education itself. I mean, do you when you were in Honduras, what was what was maybe the language you grew up? Being taught in schools, like we wasn't English was a Spanish, or is there, you know, a fusion or an integration of both in the curriculum that you guys were exposed to. So in Honduras, for the most part, public, the public education system only teaches in Spanish, I was fortunate enough to be in the private education system. So I was in a private school. It was a private Christian school and they taught me English my entire life. So that's why I'm, I have the level of English that I do I have the pronunciation that it is just because I grew up with that. But no, for the most part, English is not part of the 100 curriculum. Like I know, a lot of other countries do have that just because of how

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how widely use English is. But 100 is really doesn't a lot of times, there's not really language electives in the same way that there is over here. Like electives are not really a thing. If I were to say, ya know, like, in

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the Yeah, in like middle school, high school, all of that you don't really have electives. You just really do what the curriculum gives you. You know, so for example, on that same conversation, like I know, like, a lot of people get very good understanding of global, not politics, but history at least, and just a good like, a good overview, I guess, of what history looks like. And like what it was, and like were well, World War One World War Two, but Honduras, a lot of teachers are like, people in college, you know, how like, you have McDonald's and you have like Starbucks, and then that's like, they usually like part time jobs that people have. And there's so teachers Oh, wow. Yeah, that's, that's so a lot of my teacher. Yeah, well, because you're not allowed to teach. Unless you're sorry, you're not allowed to have a job unless you're over 18. Right. So a lot of people who are in college don't really go for service jobs, they end up going into teaching. So like part time teach,

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I don't know Spanish or English or something like that. But it ends up creating this dynamic where the teachers are like insanely under qualified to teach whatever they're

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so yeah, it's it's kind of interesting. Wow. And you guys would have I'm sure a very weird relationship with the teachers because like they're within the same oh my god, right. I, one of my best friends here in the US because she also came here through a program because she was she was studying education. The exchanges is just a exchange program for teachers from other countries. And because he's Spanish here in the US. She's one of my best friends and she was my Spanish teacher

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in high school. So because we were

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so close in age and I remember even the way that we interacted with like my entire grade, which, by the way, was another thing I had to get used to because my class was 17 people. Over here, people have so many like 400 people, like you don't get to know everyone in your own class. Like I knew everyone in my class, and we just had a really show relationship with her because she was so close to our age. Yeah. Wow. That's also I think, something that a lot of people here would be shocked to hear about. Oh, yeah, that's a Yeah, probably. Yeah. But there were so many teachers like that. How are you there? Yeah. So how did you? So you were learning English in school? But we go back home? We would speak Spanish, I presume? Yeah. But when my sister I always speak English. How? Okay, so that's an interesting thing here. I mean, how do you? Which one question I would ask is, which language do you feel connected to the most? Or which one? Which language? Do you think you can express yourself more comfortably in? Like, how do you is there is are they equal? Or? No, it depends on which settings because I feel like academically, I'm way more comfortable with English. Yeah, because like I've stated before, like, I feel my education has taken such a big upgrade since I came to the US. But I feel like I've learned different concepts and different ideas that I didn't really tackle when I was in Honduras. So my vocabulary for English is a lot more. Um, I feel like broader, it's a lot more complex. So I feel like I can defend myself in English a lot better than in Spanish. But in Spanish, I feel like, I just have this attachment to it. It's just so much warmer, it's so much. I'm so much funnier in Spanish.

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It's something I haven't really heard a lot.

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I'm hilarious in Spanish. And I wish I could speak Spanish, so I can.

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Wow, so there's so it's very much.

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It's, you know, it's depends on the situation and context.

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But now, when you say you were to spend more, you know, the next couple of years you'd be spending here in the States?

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Would you think you would still have? Would you still think that that level of attachment to Spanish, would you think it would remain as strong or, you know, it would be impacted by, you know, the number of years or the experiences that you have here in the States? I mean, what do you think about that, that's the thing that I'm currently like, that's why I'm so attached to my 100 identity today is because of the fact that as once I came here to the US, I kind of started feeling it driftaway, like, go, like even my Spanish started getting a little rusty. Oh, so I feel like, the reason why I'm hanging on to it so much now is because I don't want to lose it. So whether that'd be like the kind of experiences I've had, or the kind of customs I have, or the way that I like to eat my food or you know, like stuff like that, I just don't want to give that away, you know, I feel like it will take take away such an important part of who I am. So Spanish is part of that. I feel like, I can see that I can obviously see the progression of me losing my Spanish, the more time I spent in the US, but, um, I, I want to constantly engage in speaking Spanish because of that. So for example, I'm a business major, but I'm minoring in international studies, because I want to go into Public and International Affairs. Yeah, international affairs, and I want to work with people who are either in Latin America or Latin America, because I want to I want to keep that connection with

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my culture. I don't want to let that go away. And I feel like a lot of people do find that struggle, like I've heard so many. So many of my, my aunt who I lived with for a minute. She came from Honduras. She's in North Korea, she's in Charlotte. She doesn't know how to say some things in Spanish. And she grew up her entire life in Honduras, maybe even more longer than I did. Wow. And she forgot a lot of his like Spanish words. She speaks like her grammar is a lot worse than it was whenever she was in Honduras. Like I have better grammar than she does. Because she's She just has to speak English. And the craziest thing is when she came to the US she knew no, nothing in English. That's fascinating. Yeah, that's incredible. And why? Why Charlotte? Why North Carolina wine to south. I mean, what, Why'd that particular region? Yeah, I don't know. I I've asked myself that so many times. And I think

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to some extent, I'm grateful that it was because I wouldn't know the people that I do. And I wouldn't have had the experiences I've had if it wasn't for the fact that I was in Charlotte, and therefore I ended up in NC State, but I'm the route. The only reason why I'm in Charlotte and therefore NC State is because my aunt who came to the US before

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Are we did she? She used to live in New York. But New York was really expensive. So Well, yeah. A lot of people started migrating from New York to the south. A lot of them came to North Carolina. So it was either Florida, North Carolina, Miami, all these places. And her husband at the time, had some family in North Carolina. So they decided to settle down here. And when I came to the US with my sister, like, three years ago,

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we really didn't have anywhere to go. So we connected with my aunt, and we were like, Hey, can we can we go live with you? And that's like, how we ended up in North Carolina. Yeah. So there you still maintain? There's there's a bond that you maintain with your maybe extended family as well. Yeah, yeah. Which I'm sure is not.

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Here in the States, you wouldn't find a lot of Americans maintaining that connection. their extended family. Yeah. So

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what about the South? Do you think it's different? Do you feel like you can connect more to people here than you could maybe in New York? Or maybe the East Coast?

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Like do you feel that there's a sense of community here that is very similar to how things were makin you know, in Honduras, or, you know, culture? You were immersed in? Yeah, I 100% agree. And I think that's why a lot of people, a lot of Hispanics from New York and up north ended up gravitating towards the south is not only because of the housing, market, and economic reasons, but I also think it resembles a lot more of our culture, you know, because the way that I grew up, I always thought of, oh, I'm a northerner at heart, I'm like, cold, I'm like, No, yeah, I need to like, Yeah, I do my things when I need to do and everyone else is, like, unimportant, but no, I appreciate so much that community, you know, because that's just what I'm, what I grew up around. So I think the warmth of the South, like the traditional idea that people have of what southern families are in their connection to their extended family is really refreshing to see, because that's not the perception that I had of America, you know, and it's just, it's just great to see that some of the values are transcultural. Like they're not just from Honduras, but they're also regionally here in the US, like you can find Americans who really value the same things that I do, right? Yeah, yeah. So would you now that you have you're living abroad, and I think this is your first experience right abroad on your own? That was my come into the US most of my first time getting out of Honduras, period? Oh, yeah. That was my first time boarding a plane. Oh, well, I mean, asides from when I was a kid, but all right, and how old were you at that time? I was 17. Yes. And scary. No, I was so determined. I didn't know I didn't want to be an underage at all. No, I was like, I'm, I'm so ready to come to the US. Yeah, I had strong I was. So I was so focused on getting my education and just leaving everyone and everything I knew behind. I just wanted to reinvent myself with a different identity. And since I already felt like I had, I was different from Honduras. I was kind of separating myself already. I just saw it as like, the perfect opportunity to move on, you know, yeah, yeah. Wow. So you you did that with your sisters? Yes. Yes. Okay. So that, was that a similar experience for her as well, since you both would be considered, you know, American, you have the nationality? So that she also feels less attached to Honduras? No, she's the complete opposite. Oh, wow. Yeah, she actually we've had like, completely different developments, like she's learned to become more of her own person, despite her Honduran identity, kind of discovering herself here in America, like who she is in a different country. Whereas I've had to, like, kind of connect back to my roots and realizing what part of like, what about Honduras makes me me, you know, and it's just because whenever she left, she was devastated. She, she was a lot more distressed than I was whenever we came here, because the reason why she left was because job opportunities. College, there was just the education she was going to get here was going to be exponentially better than whenever she could have gotten gotten Honduras. So it just made sense for her to come here. And at the time, she had a job. That was a lot of people end up going into call centers in Honduras. Like that's kind of like if you're not a teacher, a call center. Oh, wow. But

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a lot of young people, mostly, and she didn't like it, she knew that she could, she had the opportunity to get a better education because he was a US citizen. So she figured she would take it and she came but um, it was a lot different. She approached it a lot more differently than I did because I was very determined and she was just, she knew that it was

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a good decision to take but she was a lot more hesitant to take it. Yeah, that's incredible. The fact that you both grew up in, you know, the same place, same house and you have

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Different ideas and perceptions of who you are, you know,

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that obviously materialized when you both had to make the decision of leaving.

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That's just incredible to me. That's Wow. What do you what is it that you think appreciate the most about US culture or the experience that you have right now here in the US? I think ironically, it's the independence, the independent nature of it. I think in Honduras, I experienced one of the reasons why I didn't like, like, I obviously miss the group dynamic, like the idea of collectivism. But I also, there's such a,

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there's a small tolerance for outliers, I think there's just if you do not fit, what is deemed as the socially acceptable, like, if you have different ideas, or if you don't agree politically, if you don't agree, you in your fashion sense, like so many things go into

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what the idea of who you should be, you know, I think in, in the US, there's so much more freedom of thought in the sense of, you can wear whatever you want, and nobody cares, you know, and you can study whatever you want to nobody cares over there. It's like, if you're not a doctor, a lawyer, or what was the other one? Let's just stay with doctor, lawyer, engineer me, yeah, engineer, you're not gonna get money, and you're kind of a disgrace to your family, you know, but over here, you can study whatever you want. And most people encourage that difference of thought, even in the education system, I think, the way in which, for example, the Interdisciplinary Studies and know what is it called the freshman, the one Oh, exploratory Exploratory Studies. Yeah, that program was crazy. For me, it encourages people to find something that they want to do, like, it's not pushing them to a certain

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degree in particular, you know, and I don't think that that's an idea that a lot of hundreds share, like, there's a common saying, in that a lot of family members would say to

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some of my cousins, it was, it would be like, somewhere along the lines of, oh, we'll finally have a doctor in the family, you know, because they want yeah, they just, there's, there's such a big pressure because of the fact that a lot of the other careers are not as well remunerated as doctors, lawyers, there's an in the collectivist idea, you know, of family and how they stick together, even after, you know, like, there's a lot of kids who are 24, and they're still living with their parents, even 30. And they're still living with their parents, you know, and there's just this big push for someone to make a lot of money. Yeah, so your personal

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passion idea that's kind of pushed to the side, and you're supposed to

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put your family first, if that makes sense. And I think that's not like I've I know, like, in the south is very prominent as well, but not in the same way. It's very different. The way in which I've, I've seen it manifests here in the US, it's just, it's just not with the same like, there's not that same level of obligation. Like in Honduras, it just feels like this is your duty as like, my kid as my like, that's my son, as my grandson as my sibling. Like, it's this is like your duty and you can't escape it. Because we're born, we're bonded by blood. But over here, there's just such bigger freedom of what you can do, you know, and even if you don't end up doing what your family wants you to do is just like, okay, you'd be a great doctor, but you know, but like, over there, it's just like, you have to do it. Because you're like,

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you we depend on you. You know, it's just a lot more ominous, I guess. Yeah. And they might even fear that you would be like, some sort of disappointment to the family. Or, you know, the reputation of the family. Oh, yeah, it's quite big. Even where I come from, yeah, region, their world. Because we, you know, my, I seem to be quite the outlier, my family and my brother too, you know, we pursued paths that weren't in the STEM world, right, you know, like, I'm doing political science, he's doing philosophy. But there is that expectation where you have to have at least one child and a family doctor. Yeah. Or you know, a lawyer. Yes, here. Yes. Because, yeah, that like kind of makes up for everyone else. No, you're gonna carry the entire

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No, that's such a common idea. And I think that's just collectivist cultures in general. They just kind of have I don't know I think like a lot of like, I understand how the South in the US it's its own like culture, and like it's very characterized by some collectivist ideas, but it's not to the extent to which collectivist cultures and other countries are because it is extremely oh my god, you're dead to like my

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at all my grandma's some of the most, it's one of the most.

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She she holds the strongest grudges I've ever seen in my entire life. Like there's like relatives that she would say, I verbally be like you are debt to me, and they were debt to her like, never spoken never to be seen never to be disgraced. Never again. Like, it's just, it's just crazy, because you grew up with like, oh, so if I'm not gonna do what my family wants me to do, then

30:28
then you know, like, what kind of value do what kind of value do I have? What kind of value do I bring to my family? What what do I what am I was all there sacrifice for you know, and I think you can acknowledge the work that your parents did for you and your family has done for you, without having to let that dictate your future? I think. And that's just not an idea. And of course, not to generalize that not all Honduras think like this, but at least my family, that's not an idea that was very present there. Like it was very, I did all of this for you, therefore, you owe me at least being a doctor. Yeah, no, I think my I could totally I agree with so many of the things that you, you know, you brought up and I think, for my family, particularly they were under that societal pressure of truly expecting one of their children to become, to live up to that standard. Yeah, but slowly, and gradually, they realize that, you know, we, it's not our passion, we don't have maybe the mental strength or the capacity to maybe go into the STEM major and enjoy it, or succeed at being, you know, biologists or a doctor, you know, mathematician, like, we maybe we don't really have that mental bandwidth or whatever, like, we're more into the arts, more humanities, and they started realizing it. And it was a tough pill to swallow, I'm sure. But then they just started to understand that there are times when you just can't really live your life trying to satisfy to society and what they expect you to do, or whatever standard, they expect you to sort of fulfill it. And so, yeah, it's it's a learning process, I think, not just for us as people who want to explore what our where our passion lies, but even if we're our families or to the society that we're in, you know, it's it's a learning process, they have to understand that, Hey, we should celebrate these differences. We shouldn't all be the same. We shouldn't all be, you know, the diversity is sometimes needed. Yeah. And I think that is, yeah, our experience is kind of, you know, is a testament to that, yeah, you really need to be who you arm yourself, which is where the idea of, you know, the individual, or the society that's, that's, that's oriented around the idea of the individual. I mean, there are many good things about that, which is something that I enjoy as well being here in the United States. Yeah, I get to explore I get to do things where I probably would be maybe afraid or, you know, sort of constrained or encouraged, encouraged not to do them. Yeah, in a different Yeah, in a different context. So that that is something that I relate to, and it's something that I think a lot of people might have difficulty understanding, especially those that maybe have lived in the States their entire lives, like they wouldn't be able to get it right. And I think partly my sister, that was like, because I didn't experience it as hard as she did. Because she was the first she was the firstborn. So she went through all of like, my both my parents were pushing her to do different things. And she was like, she tried being a doctor, studying, going to college over there to be a doctor, she didn't like that. She tried doing being a lawyer. She didn't like that. She tried doing architecture, she tried so many things. And she had so much push from my parents. And the biggest thing is, she still lived under the roof. And you know, the housing market over there is also bad. So it's not like affordable for people, for people, young people to have own their own place. You know, that's why a lot of 30 year olds end up still living with their parents is because it's just not affordable. So she knew that that was going to be her life for the next 10 years. If she stayed in Honduras, just different pressures from different people to do something that she didn't want to do. So that's why I think she was pushed to come to the US alongside Yeah, yeah. When I'm sure she made the right decision. Oh, yeah. She She's thriving. She's just she's got a great position. That's awesome. Yeah. Congratulations to her. Congratulations to you.

34:39
So I'd love to, you know, sort of wrap things up here and, you know, ask you to find a question here.

34:46
What would you maybe recommend or based off of your experience if our hearing states, what would you say to someone on Dorian who or is that the way to pronounce it properly? Yeah. 100 100. Yeah. What would you say to that one person who wants to show up

35:00
from Honduras, maybe it's 17 here to states and pursue maybe education or college degree, do your research. Because I didn't,

35:11
oh my god, if you know what you want to do,

35:15
and if it, then look for places that offer a good education on that, but even if you don't know what to do, find experiences that will show you now it doesn't matter if they'll like, show you that you don't want to do that, that's good, because you just scratch something off. And you can move on to the next thing that you think you might want to do. But just make sure that you know where you're going, because I feel or at least that you have some idea of where you're going. Like, you don't need to have anything set in stone, but just have

35:49
some, like, for me, it's mostly thinking back on the application process. And it's oh my god, it's so convoluted to go here in college in the States. And I had no idea about that. I just thought you showed up and you're like, Hey, I'm coming to college. And they'll be like, okay,

36:05
definitely not like that. Yeah. So know that know that the application process is really, it's a lot more, it's very thorough, there's a lot of aspects to it, and then know that another thing I think is like, obviously, in other countries, they're such a big,

36:22
like, since they're different countries, the only schools you really hear about are IVs really top schools and you don't need one of those to get a great education. I think I've gotten my best experience here at state than I would have in a different college. And I applied to so many colleges, I applied to 12. And it's a big number. Yeah, it's a lot, a lot, a lot of essays, but

36:48
I think I've gotten and I've been able to develop in the best way that I could have here at NC State than I would have in any other school. And I think that's just because state is the kind of school that I needed at that moment when I was applying and that I that I'm that I need now. And the resources and the professors and programs that we have here are just catered towards me. So knowing what you want not even just career wise, but as a person what your needs are and what knowing making research on what kind of institutions offer that is going to go a long way to enhance your college experience. Because yeah, I think a lot of people in Honduras, especially our focus on like, go to Harvard, but okay, there's so many factors to go into Harvard, you know, there's like the amount of money you gotta pay and so, so many other things, you know, and they might not even have the best programs for what you want to do. Like there might be other institutions who might cater to your particular needs a lot more. So just just know what you're doing. Don't throw yourself in there just just because because I did that. And I'm fine. But it was a lot harder than it needed to be. Yeah, no, definitely. Definitely. Well, yeah, that's

37:59
Amen to vet. I want to thank you for joining me one and for sharing with me your story that's just it's just an incredible sort of, you know, life that you've had. And I'm sure there's a lot more that you will be learning and experiencing as a days as you progress in your journey here in today's Thank you. Yeah, thank you for having me. Thank you.

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