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Join James Petrossi in 'Leave the Feed: 30 Days of Disconnect' as he interviews creators and mental health advocates about their journeys, the digital quagmire, and tips to create a healthier relationship with social media.
[00:00:00]
Hello and welcome to Leave the Feed 30 Days of Disconnect. Today is day 19, all about perspective and wanted to do an episode that really highlights and puts the exclamation point on all of the amazing perspectives that were shared by Epic creators and mental health advocates this season. Let's recap.
Manasi Patil: It's very important that . You are being honest to yourself because at this age, it's very, very common to, you know get like, get into peer pressure and everything. And social media has a very, very large part of it.
You see people, your age doing stuff, and then. You don't want to feel left out, but it's very important that you stay honest to the principles that you have.
Juan Faura: Seeing like, oh my gosh, this person at my age or two years older is bawling right now. They got the jet or they're you know, balling in [00:01:00] Miami or they're doing their thing. And, and the reality is, is like everyone's running their own race and you never see the other side of the equation. Someone could have a private jet, someone could have a car, someone could have the house.
But is their soul at peace.
Fiona Frills: I would say truthfully, when you catch yourself. Like starting to scroll a little too much. 'cause I think influencers do it as well. I think influencers do it for like research or whatever you wanna call it. Or they start comparing themselves and you go down this like kind of nasty rabbit hole.
And then on just like the, the fan side of things of just consuming the content. You have to set time limits. Like you cannot. Scroll for longer than like 10 minutes without really like it impacting how you feel because your for you page, it could just flip and it could become something a little more negative.
Shauna Cummins: But if you have a conscious practice of. You know, outside of your phone, outside of social media, bring your attention to what you love about yourself and your life, what you're thankful for. Your brain is gonna go there consciously [00:02:00] and deem it important. It doesn't do it really on its own. It doesn't track positivity and progress on its own, but once you start to do it as a practice, then it's really cool because you do find what you're looking for.
Ryan Lu: but it always lands back to manifestation for me. 'cause I feel like manifestation is not just speaking things into existence, but going after your dreams and acknowledging that there are things that you wanna do of your life that are bigger than what you might be doing right now.
That there are things that you wanna attract into your life. And for me, I do say I manifested my career and my life that I'm living right now. But on top of that, it's also being able to go after it, setting those goals. 'cause it's not just like. Okay, I'm gonna manifest blowing up on TikTok. It's like, well, what do you have to do for that?
You have to put the work in, you have to make the videos, you have to be like smart, strategic about it as well. And I think without that intention of, let's say, blowing up on TikTok, for example, like how are you gonna, how are you gonna start making motions towards it? I think manifestation, everyone.
Manifest whether they even realize it or not. It's pretty much having those goals and then starting to move [00:03:00] towards those goals.
Hayden Trowbridge: We actually have to put our identity in something else outside of our channels, outside of our work, outside of our analytics, right? And so having this this mind of, let's call it the mind of Christ, right? Having this heavenly perspective saying there's actually something.
Bigger right out there that informs the way that we work, that informs the way that we relate to one another informs our identity, right? I'm no longer primarily a YouTuber or a talker or an Instagram creator, right? I'm primarily a son of God, a daughter of God, right? And so that that perspective, that identity shift allows us to say.
Even if the analytics are down, even if it doesn't get as much views, I am still loved by God. 'cause it's not my worth. My value is not dependent on me. It's dependent on who created me. And he says that I'm enough. He says that I'm worthy. He says that he loves me. And so I try and use that framework.
To help creators, right? To say, you were meant for more than just making YouTube videos [00:04:00] online, right? You were meant for heavenly things.
Victoria Anderson: It's just very difficult to be authentically engaged in a social media context without very sort of disciplined practice and clear intentions about why you're there, what you're trying to get out of it. How do you speak and interact from a place of truth where, you know, the platforms are set up aren't necessarily designed for intentional, authentic interaction?
It's volume, it's doom scrolling, it's, you know it's all so algorithmically based.
And so yes, a world shaped by feeds and algorithms may make living that out a bit more difficult, but still very possible. And to your question at times even. Further enabled by. And so I guess one of the pieces of advice I would, [00:05:00] give or think about in that context is that intention to be understood and valued means that we curate our digital inputs with compassion for ourselves and for others that we.
Look for ways to choose real messages about life and about ourselves, and about our passions and our interest that we think about how to create from a place of true expression and not performance. And yes, yes, yes. Find ways to reclaim moments offline where that connection that we you know, sort of find, and that starts to vibrate in those expansive ways on social that we give them time and space to actually breathe in real life and whatever that means to the individual.
Jayo: Man, I mean authenticity [00:06:00] is really just like one of those like things that I'm chasing as well. But I think a lot of people need to chase more. It's just like, how do you be more and more authentically yourself and making sure that you're doing things that you love? Because some people do things that they think they like, but it's really like pleasing others or like what they think they want to be seen as.
And for instance, even with content itself, like some people make videos 'cause they want it to go viral and it's like they delete it when it flops. And I tell people all the time, like, I had to come to terms with myself. Like, I wanna make content that even if it flops, I do not delete. That is the goal.
And I think like if you are actually enjoying what you're doing, enjoying what you're making, you be in the moment,
I think it's very important to rest at least one day a week.
Just find what you enjoy doing. Like. me, it's basketball. I really enjoy playing basketball and no cameras on or nothing. Like I can just go to 24 Hour Fitness, whatever it is, go play basketball with some people for hours, even three, four [00:07:00] hours, dead legs.
Justin Leusner: I don't know if I've ever said this online or on a podcast or whatnot. I say it all the time in State College when I'm talking in classes or whatnot. but I don't have Instagram on my phone. I don't have TikTok on my phone. YouTube and LinkedIn are the only two platforms I have on my phone that I allow myself to, to use. And that's because I know that I can't really get. Doom scrolled on either
Eva: I have my phone on do not disturb at basically all times. Does that mean I don't have it on the home screen to see if my text is going from zero to one? Not necessarily, but for the most part, I will only check my notifications truly like once an hour.
It's almost like the rule they teach you in school. At least I learned it in school, like 45 minutes studying on 15 minutes off. That goes across like all social media. That of course does not mean that if I'm like on a walk checking emails that I'm not, on my email, you know, for an [00:08:00] hour. It's more just for anything that's like a distraction.
So texts Instagram, Twitter, anything that is like quote unquote. Not work related.
Nila Makhfi: I think it's very important to like disconnect, to connect, but like that really resonated with me because sometimes like I'm literally just sitting with family too, and then I find myself on my phone and I'm like, this is such a. Pure intimate moments that we have as a family together.
Like why am I distracting myself with being on my phone? So let's say whenever we're eating food or whenever we're watching movies, like we always put our phones away because it's that distraction also, like if a person has fully their phone away and you guys are just speaking with no technology around you, there's a different level of connection versus if someone even is holding a phone because of that, like potential for distraction.
Emilia: I think we need to come back to see it as a tool and not just as this crutch. For life and for me, one of the things that I realized [00:09:00] last year, I felt just like so creatively burned out and it was because I was like consuming so much. I was consuming more than I was creating. So one of my goals this year has been to create more consum, way less, and that's been like a way for me to like make peace with social media a lot, to spend less time scrolling and more time photographing.
Zaida Hernandez: But I think like relationships, it's also important to set boundaries. So it can't control your life. Like it can be a part of your life. There's certain aspect of it. And you also have to be mindful of it makes you feel. So I said. Earlier that I, I took a little break from social media because I was going through a lot of life changes and I didn't feel inspired and then I think I was looking at things the wrong way. So it, it didn't make me feel good to see some things. So be mindful of how it's making you feel if. [00:10:00] You are spending time on things that give you energy, that make you feel good, then that's great. But if you start to feel that social media is impacting your life negatively, then maybe it's time to reassess some of the things that you're looking at. And maybe it's time to take a step back and disconnect.
Gigi: I also use this app called Opal, which I don't know if you've heard of it, but it's basically a screen blocking app. And so from 8:30 PM to 8:30 AM my socials and digital like connection, I guess is locked. So if you send me something or if work tries to interfere during those hours, I'm sorry, but it's gonna wait until the morning.
And that's because I also believe that. You have to shut it off at some point. And when you're a creator, if you let that boundary go, or if you don't establish that boundary, you're gonna find yourself [00:11:00] feeling drained. Because then at night, instead of focusing on reading or watching a movie, or going for a walk or playing a board game or doing a. or whatever, which is usually gonna be better for your own personal development. You're just gonna be doom scrolling. And then if you doom scroll in the night, it's also gonna mess up your eyes and your circadian rhythm because you're looking at blue light really late. And yes, I am a little crunchy, so I'm sorry if this sounds too crunchy, but I believe in that stuff.
Fiona Frills: Fiona goes to the beach. That's where Fiona goes. It is like instant, like beach. It could be any time of the day. I remember, especially when I was younger, around like 16 when I first got my license, boom, I'd beline it to the beach at like two in the morning. Like, why, who let me? I don't really know. But I love, just like, I love the ocean.
I love the sound of it. I love sounds like if, if something can kinda, like, tune out my own thoughts, like, that is great. So for me it's the ocean, watching the waves and just like being outside. [00:12:00] If I'm inside trying to decompress, it doesn't really work for me truthfully. I, I have to be outside or with people who are like uplifting and supportive but being outside, I, I think everyone needs to get outside more and put down the phone, put down social media
you have to set time limits. Like you cannot. Scroll for longer than like 10 minutes without really like it impacting how you feel because your for you page, it could just flip and it could become something a little more negative.
Eric Artell: People can't appreciate how difficult it is to read just very hurtful comments from someone that you don't know who they are and they're launching her comments at you. . That is very challenging. But then pair that with, you're putting this stuff out there and even if it doesn't receive hate or meanness and unkindness, but just doesn't get the engagement or the likes that you would want, [00:13:00] really challenging mental health wise, Because the temptation is to tie self worth to that. And so if it goes out there and people are not saying that they like it by liking it or commenting, you feel like they don't like it and therefore they don't like you and therefore you're worthless. And that is a very, very dangerous path to be on. And so certainly something that I think is very important as a content creator. As anyone who's, who's putting content out on social media to be very intentional with where you how you define your self-worth and realizing. Who you are and why you are valuable as a person to other people.
Samantha: For sure, and I also think there's to reevaluating the relationships in your life every so often, because what you don't wanna do is be in a situation where you just have these people from. Lifetimes ago that [00:14:00] have followed you for whatever reason, but you have no similar interests. You can't really connect on anything they're bringing you down in some weird way.
So it's okay to also say, this relationship isn't for me. I think doing bit of an audit because everyone grows in different directions and like that's okay. Sometimes people are just meant to be in your life for. Or a reason is that, is that the saying reason of say so I, I think there's also no harm in reevaluating your friendships and deciding that certain people don't need to be there anymore.
Shira Lazar: but also some big awareness we need to have as individuals of how to take care of ourselves. And it might mean, of course, connecting into community with fellow creators who get what we're going through and mental health professional support, but also realizing the importance I would say, of community offline that might be in this industry, but also might not be. That really understand you and get [00:15:00] you to what you do. And also not connected to what we do because so much of our identity is entangled.
Libby Shayo: Yeah, I mean, straight off the bat being Jewish and loud and proud online, especially today. Is not seen as a positive thing. So I've been receiving a lot of hate, whether it be from death, threats to hate comments ever since 2020. Unfortunate but true. So I've always been loud and, and shared even some of the comments at points where I felt like I needed to or with different platforms to share. My thoughts on the matter and like reporting the comments. I've held different community WhatsApp groups. I started one in 2020 for Jewish influencers. Started with like 20 people and now it's so beautiful. There's so many people who are Jewish voices online now. There's over 300 people in this WhatsApp.
I'm the only admin, and really it was meant to be like a safe. Protected space to help bring everyone [00:16:00] together.
Beau Shugarts: You do it your way, like and your way is the way that you do it, you know, and that's what is the beauty, you know, we are all artists in what we do as a human, within the human experience, and so. I feel that like once I had that five day phone fast and you know, some other things, it's like, you know, we've lost the art and what we do as humans.
It's just with how we have to convey, you know, we can't send emojis. We have to actually show that expression on our face and things of that sort. So, why you do it is, you know, ask yourself and continue to ask yourself until you are happy with what you know the answer is. 'cause it's, it's really just peeling back the onion with things.
Lucy: There's sometimes where I definitely notice that I'm like addicted to scrolling on Instagram and things like that. And whenever I do what always like kind of helps me reset is just kind of like.
Going on a trip for like four days where I don't have access to [00:17:00] internet, or I just like, I don't know, I put my , phone on airplane mode and tell people I'm not gonna really be in touch. And I feel like that always just like resets me. Like even if, you know, I go back to my day-to-day life and I do use my phone, I do use Instagram.
I just. It just feels like I've kind of like cold turkeyed it for a bit, and it allows me to have a much healthier relationship with it going forward, because usually I feel a lot better and more happy when I'm not using it. It just like, I don't know, it's, it just makes me feel more productive and and better as a whole.
Dylan Huey: I think, you know, at the end of the day, I think that, that believe the feed story that we're trying to tell you know, isn't a one-time thing. And I, I know that, that we have pages where you can write on the book, but you know, it might be something that might be beneficial to read seasonally or, you know, every single year. And I think that that's what's so beautiful about the book. I don't usually like [00:18:00] reading books multiple times. You know, but I think Lead the Feed really brings, you know, a un message that no matter where you are staged in your life, there's something that you can get back. There's something that you can take home.
And I think. Being able to read the book multiple times will allow you to really hone in on, on your skills that you really wanna develop.
James Petrossi: I think when I first started Leave the Feed. It was all about the negatives. And this was probably five, six years ago. And I think at that point in time, we were just coming to terms with all of the challenges it was putting on our youth, right?
And now you see the creators of this generation and what they're bringing into the world, and there's so much positive that. I've [00:19:00] fallen in love with social media. Does it mean that I'm using it all the time? No, but I can respect it as a beautiful thing that has been brought into this world from the universe itself, has given us the power to create these things, and we're creating them and we're figuring out how to use them.
Right. That's one of the challenges is understanding that something can be beautiful and be powerful, but can also be dangerous. Right? And something that we don't necessarily like to focus on too much in this existence, in this world is about like balance and temperance, right?
Like not having too much of something. And it's unfortunate because in these digital environments you can put out such amazing content. You can form amazing communities, you can solve world pressing challenges. Like really change the trajectory of the world, the power of voice, the power of community, the power of unity.
[00:20:00] Like that lights me up about social media. But where's the door to leave? and can someone find it?