194: 5 TIPS TO GET THROUGH THE HOLIDAYS WITHOUT TRIGGERING YOUR MONEY BLOCKS (TOO MUCH)
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I believe we can change the world. But first, we’ve got to stop living in fear of being judged for who we are.
Hi I'm Genecia Alluora, Founder of the #1 Leading Female Entrepreneur Network in South East Asia supporting 1 Million women to Own & LOve The F-Word. Being fabulous, having freedom, financial independence and Family.
With a challenge to women everywhere to stop TALKING themselves out of their dreams, Soul Why? Secrets of The Soul Rich Woman Blueprint identifies the excuses to let go of, the behaviours to adopt, and the skills to acquire on the path to growth, confidence, and believing in yourself to be recognised as a leader online. Get clients online and to have more impact on the world!
Stop Believing THE Lies ABOUT Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be. You're Just an "F-Word" Away from The Life You Want, The Marriage You Want... The Family That You Want, Is Going To Be Fueled By The Business & Life You Build ... Join me, become a Soul Rich Woman. Alone we are strong, Together we are unstoppable!
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[00:00:05]
Genecia Alluora: Hello, gorgeous. And welcome to today's episode. I'm your host, Genecia Alluora. Today I want to share with you the five tips to get through the holidays without triggering your money blocks. Or triggering too much of your money blocks. Now we're talking about five things you can do to make sure your money blocks aren't traded too much over the holiday period.
[00:00:28]
Genecia Alluora: Now. This is the time of the year that can get very stressful for some people. But it doesn't have to be because we are Soul Rich Woman. Now, I've got really some great tips for you today.
[00:00:40]
Genecia Alluora: The first thing I want to acknowledge is that holiday time can be really exciting for some people. And for others, it can be really stressful or even sad. So don't beat yourself up over it. Either way, especially for this year. It can be a triggering experience to spend time with your family and loved ones over this holiday season. Particularly if you have been spending a lot of time working on your personal development and money blocks, you still might be quite vulnerable to other people's energies.
[00:01:12]
Genecia Alluora: Now, here are some tips to get through the holiday period without triggering your money blocks too much. Number one, has a canned response. Now, this tip number one is a go to response when your family asks you about potentially triggering topics. This can really apply to questions about your business, so it pays to be prepared ahead of time. Now, you might have someone in your family who constantly ask you a how's your business doing right now?
[00:01:43]
Genecia Alluora: Or what are you doing for business again? Or you mean you change another business? Are you qualified to even do this? And they make you feel like shit. Here's the thing.
[00:01:57]
Genecia Alluora: You don't have to tell them about the ins and out of your business. You don't have to tell them how many clients you have, how much they pay you. You don't have to tell them anything if you don't want to. Here's a really simple go to response. It can be something like, hey, it's doing great.
[00:02:18]
Genecia Alluora: Thanks so much for asking. Well, there's a lot of things happening. I'm really, very excited. Thanks so much for your concern. As simple as that.
[00:02:30]
Genecia Alluora: Now, my family used to ask me about my programs or even my books, all the time. Because to them, a book meant real business. Having an online course or running something that is tangible. It looks tangible to them. So even though it was just a book or a program, it was just pretty a small part of my business.
[00:02:50]
Genecia Alluora: But to my family, it meant like, wow, you are real because you got a published book. You got this, you got that. So in the past, I would kind of tell a story of like well, actually, a book is just one part of my marketing plan. And, you know, right online course is something that I created because I'm very passionate about sharing. Actually, I have a lot more things in my business, blah, blah, blah. And I could literally see their eyes glaze over it, or that would lead to more uncomfortable, awkward situations and conversations about, oh, so you help people with money, but you're bankrupt.
[00:03:34]
Genecia Alluora: How does it work? Oh, so you help people with money, but you are doing okay only how does that work? Or you help people with their money, how does it even function or work in the online world? So I just decided my go to response was just going to be, oh, it's going great.
[00:03:59]
Genecia Alluora: Thanks so much for asking. It's really good right now. I'm excited about the things I'm doing now. Thank you so much for your concern. Easier said than done, Genecia.
[00:04:08]
Genecia Alluora: Okay, yes, I know, but the thing is, your business isn't any of their business, OK? And if telling them all the ins and outs lead to some awkward stuff or makes you feel like shit about yourself, then don't do it, my dear. Number two, change the subject. Which leads me to tip number two get really good at changing subject. Now this is what we call in NLP called Pattern Interrupt.
[00:04:38]
Genecia Alluora: Now you remember that game, I don't know if you've ever played it, but you take turns to ask each other questions and you are not allowed to say yes or no. And you had to counter with another question. So I got really, really good at that. And now you can do the same thing over the holidays. Instead of answering all the questions about business or your money or your bankruptcy or your debt or anything at all that makes you feel stressed. You know what get really good at changing subject.
[00:05:15]
Genecia Alluora: And you can say, oh, I love this steamboat that you have just made. What's in it? Yeah, I love this so bad. What ingredients do you use? Completely bypass what they've just asked you.
[00:05:29]
Genecia Alluora: Oh yeah, it's doing great. What about you? What's new on you? New on your side? What's going on with you?
[00:05:36]
Genecia Alluora: You know what, people love talking about themselves. So just turn the spotlight back on them so that you just put it back on them and it's easy. Change the subject again and again. Make it again to see how long you can avoid their questions. By the end of it, they'll feel great because people love talking about themselves and they'll be like, she's such a great conversationalist, she's such a great talker, she's such a great person to have at the table.
[00:06:13]
Genecia Alluora: Then it won't lead you down the path of talking about things that you don't want to or that could be potentially awkward. Number three, be clear about what you want. Now, this tip number three is all about presence. If presents trigger you, then there are a couple of ways around it. You could just straight ask people, what exactly you want for your present.
[00:06:39]
Genecia Alluora: Or tell people, what exactly you want for your present? Direct them don't just assume and don't make it a test of their love or their love language and then blame them later. Okay. Well, if they love me, my parents will finally get me the present I love. No, don't test them.
[00:07:01]
Genecia Alluora: Just tell them what you want. What's so difficult? Just say, right? That's really sure way of triggering all your old money stuff is going to continue if something has triggered you in the past. If you know that your parents are terrible at buying presents or your husband or whoever, and they have always forgotten what you like and they've always forgotten your favorite colors. Don't test them again and again to see whether they pass the test the following year of this year and see how much they love you. Correct. Just tell them upfront.
[00:07:44]
Genecia Alluora: Say hey. Mommy. Daddy. In case you need some guidance on what to get me for this holiday season, here's a link. Or you know what, I would love an amazing gift voucher. Make it really easy and just direct them. Don't worry about if you people don't buy you the right stuff, just tell them. Number four. You don't have to keep presents you don't like.
[00:08:14]
Genecia Alluora: Okay, which brings me to my fourth point. If you get presents you don't like and it does trigger old memories, you don't have to keep them. You can say thank you graciously, but you do not have to keep them. You can go straight from their house and drop it off at the charity store. Someone else is going to love that.
[00:08:36]
Genecia Alluora: If you get presents a bit before the holiday season of festive season and you open them and you don't like it, you rewrap it and donate to charity. A lot of times, a lot of places, a lot of events during these holiday seasons have wishing trees or where they will gift out to other people who are more in need of the gifts that you don't need. So someone else will love that. Just because someone's gifted you something, doesn't mean you need to make a shrine of it in your house. Keep it in like a white elephant in your home and then keep it forever.
[00:09:22]
Genecia Alluora: No need. It's okay and totally fine for you to declutter your stuff. I repeat, declutter your stuff that doesn't make you feel good and stuff that's not part of your first class life, not part of your F word life. Fabulous freedom, financial independence and a happy family. OK, then, of course, the question will be, I know you're going to ask me. Genecia, what happens if all of this doesn't work?
[00:09:56]
Genecia Alluora: Then what if like what people will say, Hey, I heard about your business. It sounds like you're ripping people off or you get terrible present. And you think, oh, for Christ's sake. Why don't you ever buy something else that I love or you just feel attacked from all angles and you feel really terrible about yourself. Well, here's tip number five for you, go do some EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique, otherwise known as tapping. Now, this has saved me many times in situations where I feel bad about myself. This was a technique I learned in 2008 and I think 2008 and I really love it so much. It's like my secret weapon when I'm going through emotional trenches and emotional, I will say lows.
[00:10:46]
So if you are in your family house and you are getting triggered, go into the bathroom and do a little bit of tapping. Ok, now I will know that you will say, even though I have these feelings, even though my family are annoying. Even though nobody loves me and by me presence that I like, I deeply and completely love and accept myself so say that to yourself. Even though I have these feelings, even though my family are super annoying, even though nobody loves me, it's not and buys me present that I like, I deeply and completely love and accept myself, then that way you are responsible for your own feelings.
[00:11:33]
Genecia Alluora: It might just be a temporary fix until you can get home, but that's OK just tap out all the ugly negative feelings so that you can move forward and be happier person during the session at your family's home. Now we are winding down now for the rest of the year. So I want to see from my family to yours, thank you so much for joining me at Soul Rich Woman, listening to my podcast, reading my blogs, the entire year or even watching my live shows, my live videos, my live streams.
[00:12:12]
You know, this might be even your first for some of you. You're like, who is this lady, who is this woman? But thank you so much for watching my live videos or listening to my podcast or even visiting my blogs. It has been such an absolute pleasure. I hope that you get everything that you want and even if you don't, I give you permission to go out there and buy them yourself. You are responsible for creating and owning your own F word and no one else can do it for you. Give yourself that gift, being fabulous, having freedom, financial independence and a happy family.
[00:12:57]
Genecia Alluora: You can have it all, sending you my love and I'll speak to you soon. Bye for now.