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Confessions of a Shop Owner is hosted by Mike Allen, a third-generation shop owner, perpetual pot-stirrer, and brutally honest opinion sharer. In this weekly podcast, Mike shares his missteps so you don’t have to repeat them. Along the way, he chats with other industry personalities who’ve messed up, too, pulling back the curtain on the realities of running an independent auto repair shop. But this podcast isn’t just about Mike’s journey. It’s about confronting the divisive and questionable tactics many shop owners and managers use. Mike is here to stir the pot and address the painful truths while offering a way forward. Together, we’ll tackle the frustrations, shake things up, and help create a better future for the auto repair industry.
Mike Allen [00:00:00]:
I wish we had a counter of times last year. 65, 66 episodes where I've been like, braxton, edit that out. And. And you did not actually edit it out. You just left it.
Bryan Pollock [00:00:09]:
Yeah, of course.
Mike Allen [00:00:11]:
The only person who doesn't listen to our episodes more than I don't listen to our episodes is you.
Braxton Critcher [00:00:16]:
Whoa, wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Mike Allen [00:00:18]:
No, no, no.
Braxton Critcher [00:00:18]:
Well, hold on. I've named my AI Braxton, so technically, Braxton is listening to it.
Bryan Pollock [00:00:24]:
Jeepers creepers. You can tell Mike's back to work. He chose violence.
Mike Allen [00:00:31]:
The following program features a bunch of doofuses talking about the automotive aftermarket. The stuff we or our guests may say do not necessarily reflect the beliefs of our peers, our sponsors, or any other associations we may have. There may be some spicy language in this show, so if you get your feelings hurt easily, you should probably just move along. So, without further ado, it's time for Confessions of a Shop Owner with your host, Mike Allen.
Mike Allen [00:01:04]:
So, Braxton, you have, like, an amateur hour set up, but you think because you have a microphone stand that you look very professional? Is that what you're saying?
Braxton Critcher [00:01:14]:
Well, it's not even the microphone setup. It's the fact that I'm using, you know, a really nice camera. I've got, you know, proper headspace, and I'm in the center of the shot. Like, after a year of this, you think you would learn a thing or two.
Mike Allen [00:01:29]:
But I'm laying odds right now. One, I can fix my headspace very easily, and I will. Two, Brian, what are the odds that something happens and he forgets to reset the timer on his camera so that there's a cut where his camera.
Bryan Pollock [00:01:47]:
He put his wife in charge of it. He might be.
Braxton Critcher [00:01:49]:
What actually will be even better than that is if it's not, the camera's not plugged in, so it could die. Like, the camera might just die. And if that happens. Hey, I'm the producer. I'll edit it out.
Mike Allen [00:02:04]:
Okay? I wish we had a counter of times last year. 65, 66 episodes where I've been like, braxton, edit that out.
Braxton Critcher [00:02:11]:
And too many.
Mike Allen [00:02:13]:
And. And you did not actually edit it out. You just left it.
Bryan Pollock [00:02:16]:
Yeah, I'm not.
Braxton Critcher [00:02:18]:
Well, at first, the only person who.
Mike Allen [00:02:22]:
Doesn'T listen to our episodes more than I don't listen to our episodes is you.
Braxton Critcher [00:02:27]:
Whoa, wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Mike Allen [00:02:29]:
No, no.
Braxton Critcher [00:02:30]:
Well, hold on. I've named my AI Braxton, so technically, Braxton is listening to it.
Bryan Pollock [00:02:36]:
Jeepers creepers. You can tell Mike's back to work. He chose violence. Look at all them pillows.
Mike Allen [00:02:48]:
No, my feet are dangling on the ground.
Bryan Pollock [00:02:50]:
Look at you. We never did get that shot.
Mike Allen [00:02:54]:
Look at that.
Bryan Pollock [00:02:54]:
You got to get the shot here.
Braxton Critcher [00:02:55]:
I. I had a friend of mine in high school that.
Mike Allen [00:02:59]:
Is it time? Where is it time for trt, you think.
Braxton Critcher [00:03:04]:
Maybe.
Bryan Pollock [00:03:05]:
Oh, just get over it. Put a hat on. Here, look at this. Ready?
Mike Allen [00:03:12]:
All right, so episode one was released on January 2nd, I think, and we're gonna release this one on December 30th, so 363 days apart. It will be, I think, the 66th or 67th episode, if we count the bonus episodes we had early in the. In the year that didn't get numbered. Why. Why do you roll your eyes on the bonus episodes, Brian?
Bryan Pollock [00:03:34]:
I didn't roll my eyes, did I?
Mike Allen [00:03:36]:
I feel like you rolled your eyes.
Bryan Pollock [00:03:37]:
I was. I was more of like, he's just done it.
Braxton Critcher [00:03:40]:
He doesn't even know that he's doing it anymore.
Mike Allen [00:03:42]:
Episode one was titled what the Hell Are We Doing? So I feel like it was. I feel like this one has to be, what the hell have we done? Right.
Braxton Critcher [00:03:52]:
Well, it still could be the same thing.
Mike Allen [00:03:54]:
Yeah. You would think that now we would know a little bit more actively what the hell we're doing, but you would.
Bryan Pollock [00:04:03]:
Think so, but here we are.
Mike Allen [00:04:07]:
Maybe not. I will say that thanks to the help of some of our awesome guests and friends and other industry peers, that, I mean, by all the measurements that matter and by this, I mean only the measurements that make us look good, we are definitely the best automotive podcast.
Bryan Pollock [00:04:30]:
Ever in the history of the galaxy.
Mike Allen [00:04:33]:
Yeah. I mean, whoa. And considering how humble I am, that's pretty remarkable growth in just a year.
Bryan Pollock [00:04:41]:
That's pretty crazy. So.
Mike Allen [00:04:45]:
I mean, how many Facebook followers do we have now on the podcast?
Bryan Pollock [00:04:50]:
Looks like 13585.
Mike Allen [00:04:54]:
It's a very specific number. That's weird.
Braxton Critcher [00:04:57]:
It would be evil. Podcaster of. You like to be the only automotive podcast that has the active follower count, you know, on display.
Mike Allen [00:05:10]:
So this thing's in my office and plugged up 24 7. Right. I don't, like, just take it out for recording. This has taken over my desk, this little background section of stuff with our sponsors and whatnot. It just lives there all the time. And so I'll be sitting in here with Amanda. We're working on the family budget, or we're talking or we're watching something on TV or whatever, and you hear that as it spins up with another one, and I. I always just giggle a little bit.
Mike Allen [00:05:39]:
I Think she thinks it's pretty bad for us because it's. You know, every time that happens, she's like, oh, look, Mike's ego just got a little bit bigger. Super. So.
Braxton Critcher [00:05:48]:
Well, I'm just happy that you finally caught on to what it really feels like to see numbers grow, because in. In Mooresville was when the Darren video was, like, going viral.
Mike Allen [00:06:03]:
Yes.
Braxton Critcher [00:06:03]:
And I. I will. I mean, just.
Bryan Pollock [00:06:06]:
You were so excited.
Mike Allen [00:06:07]:
You geeked out.
Braxton Critcher [00:06:08]:
So I. I was. I. I can't.
Bryan Pollock [00:06:10]:
Like, what the hell is this dude talking about?
Braxton Critcher [00:06:14]:
Yeah, I went a little crazy.
Bryan Pollock [00:06:17]:
I went a little over here or what? Braxton's all excited.
Mike Allen [00:06:21]:
I'm like, so that was our first quasi viral video. It went over a million. Yeah.
Braxton Critcher [00:06:25]:
And it's still. It's still the most, actually. It's tied for the most. Yeah.
Mike Allen [00:06:29]:
Yeah. I think there are a couple of them at like, 1.4, 1.5. But Braxton, you were giddy like a schoolgirl that whole weekend. Like, you couldn't stop looking at your phone, looking at the view count, and looking at the comments.
Bryan Pollock [00:06:45]:
He's like, coming in in the middle of somebody's presentation, he's like, guys, guys, guys, look, guys, look, guys, guys, guys, look, guys. It's like when. It's like when my Sammy beats the next Mario level. It was awesome.
Mike Allen [00:06:58]:
Well, I mean, look, let's be honest. Most of the best content that's come out of this show has been our guests, right? We just get the hell out of the way and let them do what they do. And some of that has been really touching, and some of that has been really funny, and some of it has been slightly alarming, and I think it. It probably makes sense to share some of those, just to talk about them again. So the first one. One we were talking about was the first time Darren Barney was on the show from Elite Worldwide. He's the president owner of Elite, but he was talking about when his business went from early in his business, when it went from I'm working there 80 hours a week to having a little bit more perspective. So I'm gonna play that real quick.
Mike Allen [00:07:48]:
We were busy.
Darren Barney [00:07:48]:
We were two months out. My dad had cancer, and my brother had went home to be with mom and dad, and there was the three brothers working there at that time. And he called me, he's like, you guys need to come home. Dad's not doing well. And we're like, oh, no, we're good. You know, we're two months out, all that stuff. And he's like, no, you really need to come home. And we're like, okay, well, we'll keep going.
Darren Barney [00:08:05]:
We'll come over this weekend. This was on a Wednesday. We'll come home, you know, we'll go over on the weekend. He called like four times that day and finally at 4:30 he's like, seriously, guys, please come home.
Mike Allen [00:08:13]:
So sorry.
Darren Barney [00:08:14]:
I get kind of emotional about it. So we piled up in this old 88 Honda Accord we had. It was a five hour drive, my younger brother and I, and we drove over there, got there at 11:30 at night and he died at midnight. And it was one of those things that I got home but only had that half hour with him. And it made me really start questioning things.
Mike Allen [00:08:32]:
Because we love what we do, right?
Darren Barney [00:08:33]:
I mean, we got there seven in the morning, worked 11 o' clock at night, and it's great and you love it, but in the end, I mean, we didn't have any free time. Almost missed my dad dying.
Mike Allen [00:08:46]:
So one, that hits kind of tight for anybody who's lost somebody important to them, right. And two, what an amazing guy Darren is for being able to like. Like we share stuff all the time on the podcast, but we share stuff that's kind of funny and kind of off the cuff or a little bit crude or whatever else it might be, but that's like opening up and being truly vulnerable to the world. And so kudos to Darren and I'll tell you, you know, behind the scenes for our listeners, after we finish a recording, if it's an in person recording and you know, we shake hands and high five or whatever and they leave the studio and Braxton and I are talking afterwards, or they leave the recording session and Brian and I are talking afterwards. We always talk about the episode and the guest and what, you know, how.
Bryan Pollock [00:09:39]:
Right.
Mike Allen [00:09:40]:
And every time Darren was on, it was like, holy cow, that dude's awesome.
Braxton Critcher [00:09:45]:
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what happened. That was recorded in Kansas City. And I looked at you and I was like, that was a killer episode.
Bryan Pollock [00:09:55]:
It was the same after he walked out at Asta. I was like, holy crap, that dude's freaking awesome.
Braxton Critcher [00:09:59]:
Both of you were like, I really like that guy.
Bryan Pollock [00:10:02]:
Yeah, that's what I remember that. I freaking really like that guy. Yeah, he's, I think, easy to get along with, that one.
Mike Allen [00:10:09]:
He's totally genuine. I mean, there's not.
Bryan Pollock [00:10:11]:
Oh, yeah, not.
Mike Allen [00:10:12]:
Yeah, there's not a thing on that dude's body.
Bryan Pollock [00:10:14]:
There's not an ounce of BS in his whole body. He just. Yeah, yeah.
Braxton Critcher [00:10:19]:
And I think, like, it Also speaks to, you know, Mike, when you started this show, you wanted it to be about just being raw and people just telling, like, what the heck they did wrong and going into all the details, and sometimes it's hard to get people to do that. But you've had, I think, looking back on the last, you know, 360 some days, you said it was like, it's been really cool to see some of the guests you've had on. And Darren is one of my favorites because he's like, you said, he's not fake, he's not putting on a show. And he, he. He pulls at like, some stuff that often people don't, like, talk about out loud. They say it in their mind. And like, his episode was just like, really, really good. And you, you, when I looked at you, I was like, oh, man, that was a killer episode.
Braxton Critcher [00:11:10]:
And you said, was it? I think it was okay.
Mike Allen [00:11:15]:
I don't know how to deal with, like, complex emotions.
Braxton Critcher [00:11:17]:
Yeah, yeah.
Mike Allen [00:11:18]:
Well, he. I can deal with funny or angry.
Bryan Pollock [00:11:21]:
Like his eight crayons.
Mike Allen [00:11:22]:
Yeah. I don't, I don't do sad and vulnerable. I don't. I'm like, all right, so, yeah, so.
Braxton Critcher [00:11:32]:
That was a great episode. But yeah, after two times. That's enough of Darren. That's enough, like, tears because he, he.
Mike Allen [00:11:39]:
Just went there.
Bryan Pollock [00:11:41]:
I saw it.
Mike Allen [00:11:42]:
Yeah. I can't deal with Darren more than once or twice a year because it starts to make me realize how emotionally closed off I am. And I don't want to look in the mirror like that. That's not fun. So.
Braxton Critcher [00:11:56]:
You don't want to grow. You don't want to be a better human.
Bryan Pollock [00:11:58]:
Yeah, grow. Nonsense, poopy pants. Yuck.
Mike Allen [00:12:03]:
When in doubt, insert fart jokes here. So anyway, that was one of our best ones, one of the early ones that really caught. It's still going. It. It has become part of canon and lore and all the groups that we frequent. And that is the 16 foot trailer. You. You're not allowed to give me advice unless you've got a 16 foot trailer.
Mike Allen [00:12:30]:
And we'll play that. And then I want to talk about how that's become an inside joke for just about 50,000 people.
Zeb Beard [00:12:36]:
I was still kind of skeptical. I was thinking, I'm gonna, I'm gonna let it. See how it shakes out. So I talked to him. I think only one phone call maybe. And so I look him up on Facebook himself as himself, and I go to his page and I'm scrolling through it, and of course it's just. His page is like, it's the most bland you've ever seen.
Mike Allen [00:12:57]:
I mean, cookie cutter, he was too boring.
Bryan Pollock [00:13:01]:
Was he too boring for you?
Zeb Beard [00:13:02]:
Oh my God, it was awful. I mean, it was there stand there going, you know, every picture they're standing in front of a car with their thumbs. It's the gayest you've ever seen. So I scroll down his page, I'm scrolling, I'm looking and, and I get, I'm on his personal page now. And he goes, hey, I'm looking to. I need to move some equipment for the shop. Does anybody on my friends list have a 16 foot trailer that I can borrow? And I go, Stroker's Diesel does not take financial advice or business advice, any kind of advice from somebody who has to borrow a 16 foot trailer. Stroker's Diesel, we have low boys and.
Bryan Pollock [00:13:52]:
I mean has semis. Low boys and dozers.
Zeb Beard [00:13:56]:
We don't listen to people that don't have a 16 foot trailer. We don't listen to those people.
Braxton Critcher [00:14:01]:
We don't, we don't, we don't do that.
Zeb Beard [00:14:03]:
I knew right there. I said this is, this is, this is bogus. I'm not doing this.
Mike Allen [00:14:11]:
Oh, I forgot some of this colorful choices of descriptor from the 16 foot trailers.
Bryan Pollock [00:14:18]:
Second class citizens and they're non trailer action.
Mike Allen [00:14:21]:
That's like your first big boy purchase when, when you're in Arkansas, you're like 15 years old, you got to get a trailer.
Braxton Critcher [00:14:29]:
That'S a clip that you just need to like save on your phone. And anytime it's been one of those days at the shop, just play it.
Mike Allen [00:14:37]:
Yes, yes.
Bryan Pollock [00:14:39]:
You could play part of that as that part of that could be the outro stroke from people who don't own a 16 foot trailer.
Mike Allen [00:14:47]:
You know what we need to put it on the wish list for 2026 is we need to fly to Arkansas and take the podcast set up and just record some episodes at Stroker's Bar and Grill.
Bryan Pollock [00:14:58]:
Right.
Mike Allen [00:14:59]:
I'm inviting myself to Zeb's house without asking Zeb first.
Bryan Pollock [00:15:05]:
But I think he'd be okay. I think, I think it'd be fine.
Mike Allen [00:15:08]:
Yeah, Stroker's Bar and Grill looks like a kind of place I want to hang out. The other really great thing that came from the Zeb episode that we don't have the sound clip loaded on. But do you have your hat handy?
Bryan Pollock [00:15:28]:
I keep it.
Braxton Critcher [00:15:29]:
I keep.
Mike Allen [00:15:31]:
Feetfinder.Com.
Bryan Pollock [00:15:33]:
Oh, it doesn't really fit my headphones.
Mike Allen [00:15:35]:
It doesn't fit with the headphones on. So. Yeah. So Brian, who, who Made that again.
Bryan Pollock [00:15:44]:
Matt Skunrick made it.
Mike Allen [00:15:45]:
Yeah, he made me a couple also, but I don't have the. The special logo on the front. I've just got the podcast logo on it.
Bryan Pollock [00:15:54]:
I thought it was excellent.
Mike Allen [00:15:56]:
Thank you, Matt, for that. But so evidently you can. There's a market for squishing your feet over cream cheese.
Bryan Pollock [00:16:05]:
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. They're 100 is.
Mike Allen [00:16:08]:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you can. If you can dig up that voicemail and splice it in, that would be great. But Zeb admitting that it was him that was the secret requester for the hundred dollar.
Bryan Pollock [00:16:19]:
I love Brian's feet.
Mike Allen [00:16:22]:
I love Brian and I love his feet. Anyway, so that was maybe the hardest I've laughed in forever. But also, what. One of the things that's happened this year is that I have feared for my life actively during a recording, and there have been times that I've been very thankful that Brian is a fucking Sasquatch and there to protect me. So I don't know if anybody remembers this episode, but it was from the godfather of Angry Automotive podcasting himself. I'm just going to play it, and.
David Roman [00:17:00]:
That bothers me is what I'm saying.
Mike Allen [00:17:02]:
You can't.
David Roman [00:17:02]:
I couldn't roll that in.
Mike Allen [00:17:04]:
I couldn't.
David Roman [00:17:04]:
Just like credit card. It's just a credit card fee. It is not like credit card fees. It is not like credit card fees.
Mike Allen [00:17:10]:
So it's like saying.
David Roman [00:17:11]:
What you're saying is that shit art that you buy at Walmart is the same thing as a Van Gogh. You just pictures on the wall, bro. No, it's not.
Mike Allen [00:17:19]:
What if it's a print of a Van Gogh?
David Roman [00:17:22]:
It still. Still requires the Van Gogh genius. It still requires the Van Gogh genius.
Bryan Pollock [00:17:27]:
Damn, I should have hit record. I didn't realize.
David Roman [00:17:33]:
It'S you. You are. You are taking. You are taking skills that require unique talent. Todd Hayes. You're taking skills that require unique talent and are dumbing it down to the most rudimentary, like, processes. They're just bodily movements.
Mike Allen [00:17:52]:
How is he dumbing it down?
David Roman [00:17:53]:
You're sucking the soul out of the work.
Mike Allen [00:17:56]:
How is he dumbing it down?
David Roman [00:17:59]:
Because you're saying that anybody for it.
Mike Allen [00:18:01]:
No, he's not saying that anybody can do it. He's not charging the customer for. It's a cost of customer acquisition. It's a market marketing cost. It is.
David Roman [00:18:09]:
Is it a marketing. You. You saying that it's for free is just market and spin because it's not free.
Bryan Pollock [00:18:16]:
You're just.
David Roman [00:18:17]:
You're.
Mike Allen [00:18:17]:
It's making it into.
David Roman [00:18:19]:
You're socializing it. That's all you're doing it. That's all you're doing. It's not free.
Mike Allen [00:18:23]:
Just service advisors. Because it's not free to the customer.
David Roman [00:18:27]:
The customer's still paying for it. I'm just, hey, we're making everybody pay.
Mike Allen [00:18:31]:
For it, just like you do with your high skill service advisors. Because they're not really high skills. They're just kind of stupid. You can learn how to do that?
Bryan Pollock [00:18:37]:
Yes.
Mike Allen [00:18:38]:
Okay.
Bryan Pollock [00:18:38]:
I mean, here's the thing. Apart. But look at his people skills.
David Roman [00:18:43]:
That's. That's just a personality thing.
Bryan Pollock [00:18:46]:
Did you not.
David Roman [00:18:46]:
Did you miss that part?
Mike Allen [00:18:48]:
Dude.
David Roman [00:18:51]:
I get it.
Zeb Beard [00:18:51]:
You're slow.
Bryan Pollock [00:18:52]:
You said it yourself.
David Roman [00:18:54]:
It is a personality thing. Listen to me. It's a personality thing. It can be taught. And guess what? Not shop managers. They are fantastic service advisors can get replaced with a fucking link. I send the goddamn link. They click, they buy.
David Roman [00:19:10]:
I just replaced you with a fucking link. So you're telling me that can't. That takes special skill. But the technique. I can't replace the technician with a link. I would do it tomorrow if I could. I can't replace him with a link.
Mike Allen [00:19:24]:
Spittle come across the table at me.
Bryan Pollock [00:19:26]:
His freaking skull veins have veins popping out of them. He's got sub veins. So I think I forgot so much of that. Like the part where I told him, don't yell at me, bro. He's like facing me yelling. I'm like, I'm not the one who said that. Yell. I'm like, more.
Braxton Critcher [00:19:47]:
And both of you were just like pushing his buttons. Oh, my goodness. I wish I was there for.
Bryan Pollock [00:19:55]:
Can't you see he's got people skills?
Braxton Critcher [00:19:59]:
Oh, dude. What if it's like a picture of a van Gogh?
Mike Allen [00:20:04]:
What if it's a high quality reproduction of a van Gogh? Not the dormant van Gogh, but like.
Bryan Pollock [00:20:11]:
This isn't wood green. This is high quality simulated wood green.
Mike Allen [00:20:17]:
I think that this is when we call publicly amongst all of our community that we need to have an intervention for David in his and his rage issues. So, David, we love you, buddy, and we want what's best for you.
Bryan Pollock [00:20:35]:
Yep.
Mike Allen [00:20:36]:
I want. Well, I don't know. Maybe I do want the rage some more because that was good content.
Bryan Pollock [00:20:41]:
Oh, my gosh.
Mike Allen [00:20:43]:
I want the rage, but not the risk of stroke because he was really close to a stroke right there. I think.
Bryan Pollock [00:20:48]:
I think that he was closer to coming across the table to strangle you. And he was a stroke. I thought I was going to have to. I thought I was going to have to remind him it doesn't matter how much he goes to the gym.
Mike Allen [00:21:02]:
That is one of the. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Braxton Critcher [00:21:05]:
You know, Mike, it just hit me. This occurrence was just before the downfall of David's injuries. Do you think that maybe you had something to do with it?
Mike Allen [00:21:18]:
Do you think we broke him?
Bryan Pollock [00:21:21]:
I think you did something to him.
Braxton Critcher [00:21:24]:
He went into the confessional and came out a different person.
Bryan Pollock [00:21:27]:
He was not okay.
Mike Allen [00:21:28]:
It's never been the same.
Bryan Pollock [00:21:33]:
He was not okay.
Mike Allen [00:21:38]:
So what were like the hot topics that I think were recurring themes? Obviously it was free diagnosis, which we talked about ad nauseam. I think we, we kind of got started after the flat rate conversation and kind of become boring and repetitive. So we didn't talk about flat rate much.
Bryan Pollock [00:21:54]:
Yeah, I don't even like talking about flat rate anymore.
Mike Allen [00:21:57]:
Saturdays was a thing. First confessional of the episode for a lot of our listeners might not know. I am a firm believer that the consumer wants Saturdays. And in fact Saturdays are great for selling. And I opened on Saturdays also in January, right about the time that we started the podcast. And six months into the year, we're up 40% year over year. Right. It's pretty great, right?
Bryan Pollock [00:22:27]:
Working 20% more days.
Mike Allen [00:22:29]:
It would stand to reason that one of the Saturdays has to work is you have to, you have to have a full staff six days a week. Right? And it turns out, and this might be a shocker to some of you, some people don't want to work on Saturdays. And so it is slightly more difficult to keep a full staff four, six days a week.
Bryan Pollock [00:22:53]:
Mike, do you mean to tell me that skilled high level technicians typically have a family and that skilled high level technicians typically like to have the same two days off a week as their kids have off from school?
Mike Allen [00:23:11]:
No, no. I mean, you guys like your kids.
Bryan Pollock [00:23:16]:
If only there was some guy from up north the size of a refrigerator that told you, told you that texts don't like working Saturdays.
Mike Allen [00:23:22]:
So to be fair, again, I have texts that were totally good with Saturdays occasionally.
Bryan Pollock [00:23:28]:
No, you have texts that told you they were okay with working Saturdays.
Mike Allen [00:23:31]:
Well, they don't. Don't fucking tell me you're okay with it unless you're okay with it.
Bryan Pollock [00:23:35]:
Well, they did.
Mike Allen [00:23:36]:
Well, anyway, it turns out it was short term gain, long term pain. My business is not open on Saturdays anymore. It made it 10 months. And while it was really good for revenue, it was not good for morale or shop culture. And I still want to be open six days a week. But I got to figure out how to make it work and not crush morale and culture before I'm willing to do it again. Because right now I'm in the process of rebuilding company morale.
Bryan Pollock [00:24:13]:
Do you have. Do you have people that actually, like, you don't feel like they felt we're being forced to work Saturdays? Do you have people that you think would like the extra, like, like the extra money?
Mike Allen [00:24:24]:
Yeah, there are people who would like the extra money. There are people who so don't have kids in the house anymore.
Bryan Pollock [00:24:30]:
Is there a possibility that you have pre sold jobs and they can roll in on Saturday and crank the workout and then leave?
Mike Allen [00:24:38]:
I mean, if we were better at what we do, maybe.
Braxton Critcher [00:24:41]:
But you know what would be funny, Mike, is if in 2026, you know, you've been talking about, like, I should.
Mike Allen [00:24:50]:
Try, I should try four days a week.
Braxton Critcher [00:24:51]:
In 26, I was going to say, what if you went to four days?
Bryan Pollock [00:24:54]:
You should go from five days to four, seven days to six days to four days, back to five days in 2020.
Mike Allen [00:25:01]:
And so in 2027, it's got to be seven days. And then in 2028, I've got to go full Becky Wit three and a half days a week.
Bryan Pollock [00:25:08]:
They call that Black Monday. They call it Black Monday the day after the owner's training conference. And here he comes with a list of changes. They call that Black Monday, baby.
Mike Allen [00:25:19]:
Oh, man. So anyhow, so that's my first confession. Give it to me, boys. What's going on with you guys?
Bryan Pollock [00:25:28]:
Who should go first, me or Braxton? I can go first. Braxton.
Braxton Critcher [00:25:32]:
You got it, Brian. Go for it.
Bryan Pollock [00:25:36]:
You know, I had a hard time coming up with some. But one thing that definitely happens is for like, relearns and resets, I definitely, you know, I'm a big time, you know, RTFM guy. I gotta read the service info. And a lot of times, a lot of times when I go to relearn or reset something, you'll hear from my phone, it'll say something like, hey, guys, Chris, Vic's here. Or whatever. Because 100% use YouTube a lot for resets, which is kind of funny. And then the funnier thing is when we actually, actually we were having a meeting about this episode, right? And Mike was pointing out the counter. We were waiting for it to go up.
Bryan Pollock [00:26:14]:
It was stuck at 12,829. We were waiting for it to 12,830 so we could watch two digits. Rol. And that's when we followed out, found out that I follow every automotive Facebook page there in the world.
Mike Allen [00:26:30]:
Other than your own podcast?
Bryan Pollock [00:26:32]:
Other than this podcast.
Mike Allen [00:26:35]:
So I was the first follower of our page because I made the page, right?
Bryan Pollock [00:26:42]:
And I mean, it was kind of funny. I had admin privileges, but I wasn't following it.
Mike Allen [00:26:46]:
Yeah, you were an admin on the page. You've done half of the post on the page, and you weren't actually a follower of the page.
Braxton Critcher [00:26:55]:
I mean, Mike, you know, as evil podcaster, I. I feel like that's. That is. That is a mark against Brian.
Mike Allen [00:27:03]:
You know, I think that might be.
Braxton Critcher [00:27:05]:
Two more strikes, and he may.
Mike Allen [00:27:06]:
He may be going, you know, absolute. Absolute ownership. I'm gonna say that's a failure on my part as a leader to make sure that he knew and he needed to follow the page where he did all.
Bryan Pollock [00:27:17]:
I'm unfollowing this Evan thing right now.
Mike Allen [00:27:19]:
Are you gonna unfollow us? Don't do it, man.
Bryan Pollock [00:27:21]:
Don't do it.
Mike Allen [00:27:22]:
It's got, like a 10 second delay. We'll see how long it takes.
Bryan Pollock [00:27:24]:
It's not even funny.
Braxton Critcher [00:27:25]:
Oh, so it also goes down too, I guess.
Mike Allen [00:27:27]:
Oh, yeah, it goes down. Yeah, yeah. Took every time pointing out one time.
Bryan Pollock [00:27:32]:
Here, and it went down every time.
Braxton Critcher [00:27:34]:
A DI have the same, like, noise.
Mike Allen [00:27:36]:
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Bryan Pollock [00:27:37]:
Huh. Every time a di like talking about Euro. Oh, gosh.
Mike Allen [00:27:47]:
So we. By the time this is released, we will have released, I don't know, 65, 66 episodes, we said. Now we have recorded probably four episodes that will never air because of, you know, file corruption or terrible content or.
Braxton Critcher [00:28:09]:
Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike. Okay, just be honest. If I wasn't on this episode right there, you wouldn't have said corruption, whatever. Because of Braxton.
Mike Allen [00:28:20]:
Yeah, that's what I was.
Bryan Pollock [00:28:22]:
Well, you're here, and we still plan on doing that. You just kind of jump the gun on it.
Braxton Critcher [00:28:26]:
I'll. Come on, lean into it.
Mike Allen [00:28:27]:
Okay, so at Vision, we had just recorded, like, the Darren episode that we talked about earlier. We had recorded. We got, what, like seven or eight episodes there, right? And it was the last. Yeah, I think we were packing up the studio. Right. And you were looking all nervous.
Braxton Critcher [00:28:46]:
Is this my confession or is it your confession?
Mike Allen [00:28:48]:
I feel like I'm a better storyteller than you are, but go ahead. Well, you are, clearly don't.
Bryan Pollock [00:28:52]:
And Mike, way more humble than. Way more humble.
Mike Allen [00:28:56]:
Hey, it's me, Mike's kid. Want to tell us your wild shop stories? Or maybe you just think my dad's totally wrong. Call us at 7:04 confess and leave a message. You can tell us. We're awesome. Or you can tell us we're idiots. We're cool either way. That's 704 confess.
Mike Allen [00:29:13]:
Just don't make it too weird.
Braxton Critcher [00:29:15]:
So, yeah, we talked about the Darren episode. That video went viral. And we got some other. The Charlie episode from Auto Shop Answers. I mean, there was some good. There was some good content there.
Mike Allen [00:29:27]:
And, yeah, Sunil and PJ talking about manly miatas.
Braxton Critcher [00:29:32]:
That's right. That's right. And you and I are. Yes, we're. We're packing up the studio. And this is when you learned about what I had done, but I had known about it two hours previous, Freaking out the whole time. During the last recording of the day. I, like, I was starting to stink.
Braxton Critcher [00:29:54]:
I was sweating so much.
Bryan Pollock [00:29:56]:
I was like.
Braxton Critcher [00:29:58]:
I had been. While you were out doing whatever, I was editing some podcast out in the lobby, and I had taken some stuff with me. And when I came back into the studio for that last recording, we plugged in one of your drives, but the other drive I could not find that had all the other recordings. And I was like, man, I. I left it out there in the lobby. And so I went out to the lobby, all the stuff wasn't there. And I called the director of Vision. What's her name?
Mike Allen [00:30:35]:
Sherry Hamilton.
Braxton Critcher [00:30:37]:
Yeah, I called her and was like, hey, if. If. If somebody turns in a storage drive, can you please make sure that gets back to me? Because that's very important. Like, I, I, I had gone. I went to lost and found and checked. I called her. Like, I, I had checked my. I had checked your stuff, like in your Pelican case.
Braxton Critcher [00:30:58]:
Like, I was not. I was not well. And I sat down and I said, mike, I just kind of looked at you and said, so I just need to tell you something. And you were like, oh. And I said, I. I don't know where the storage drives are. And you. You kept a good, strong face, but you had to have been like, no way.
Braxton Critcher [00:31:33]:
But thankfully, you were like, no, no way. I'm sorry. You. You can tell your part of the story here because you knew where they were.
Mike Allen [00:31:40]:
They were in my book bag, dude.
Braxton Critcher [00:31:42]:
Yeah.
Mike Allen [00:31:42]:
Yeah. All you had to do was ask me. I would have saved you two hours of stress, bro. But I think it's pretty funny the fact that you were like, oh, I have. I have the proverbial bed, and I'm not gonna tell anybody. I'm just gonna sweat this out.
Braxton Critcher [00:31:58]:
Well, I was like, you know, I can't tell him before. He won't be worth anything. Like, he'll be so mad.
Mike Allen [00:32:05]:
I was gonna react. I was.
Braxton Critcher [00:32:07]:
Well, I thought my plane ticket might just evaporate and I'd be stuck in Kansas City, I don't know, renting a.
Mike Allen [00:32:15]:
Car, driving back to North Carolina.
Braxton Critcher [00:32:17]:
Yeah. You know, something like that.
Bryan Pollock [00:32:19]:
Do you know how many people that guy employs? Do you not think that he's had way worse days than that?
Mike Allen [00:32:25]:
Oh, during the course of. During the course of our recording, we've dropped two cars off of lifts for the same reason. Hadn't done it. Hadn't done it about that in 20 years. And we did it twice within, like 60 days. Yeah. Right.
Braxton Critcher [00:32:40]:
I have one more brief confession.
Mike Allen [00:32:43]:
Okay.
Braxton Critcher [00:32:43]:
Of the year, and the first one I felt way worse about. Thankfully, it actually didn't happen. The second one did happen. You know, as a podcast producer, you're responsible to make sure that the quality is good. Audio, video. You run the social media, you cut up the reels. But also part of that is you make sure that the sponsors are happy. They get ads, they get their logos, and you also ought to make sure that you spell their names properly.
Mike Allen [00:33:18]:
Yep, yep.
Braxton Critcher [00:33:21]:
And I. I did that. Except for that one time.
Mike Allen [00:33:26]:
Yeah. I mean, I would say nobody's perfect, but I mean, T E K M E, T R. I mean, it's a pretty complex word. I get it. I mean, it's like onomatopoeia, fragilistic.
Bryan Pollock [00:33:43]:
All of those have way more syllables.
Mike Allen [00:33:46]:
Yeah, it's true. Anyway, so now you are officially announcing that you are getting a Tech Metric tattoo.
Braxton Critcher [00:33:54]:
Yeah, we were trying to decide where.
Mike Allen [00:33:56]:
Down on your belly.
Bryan Pollock [00:33:57]:
So upside down in your belly. So you can just look right down and remember how to spell it.
Braxton Critcher [00:34:01]:
Yeah. As I'm typing, just like. Oh, let me just double check. How's that?
Mike Allen [00:34:04]:
Perfect.
Braxton Critcher [00:34:05]:
Okay.
Mike Allen [00:34:05]:
Perfect. Yeah. So I. I really want to. I want. I want to say thank you for your commitment to getting it right moving forward. And we will have a grand reveal of. Your wife just hit the record button again, didn't she?
Braxton Critcher [00:34:21]:
She did.
Mike Allen [00:34:22]:
I saw the camera.
Bryan Pollock [00:34:23]:
I saw it.
Mike Allen [00:34:27]:
But we will have a grand re at as at tectonic of your Tech metric upside down. Tech metric tattoo on your belly.
Bryan Pollock [00:34:37]:
Does he have to stand on his head for the grand reveal?
Mike Allen [00:34:40]:
I think he just needs to put a first person view camera on and.
Bryan Pollock [00:34:44]:
Oh, he just needs some meta glasses.
Braxton Critcher [00:34:46]:
Yeah, put like him. Put like two mirrors, like, right here and hold them up.
Bryan Pollock [00:34:50]:
He'll end up with a sunburn. Put the mirrors away.
Mike Allen [00:34:52]:
Yeah. Good call. So anyway, that's how devoted we are to making sure that we get it right for our sponsors.
Braxton Critcher [00:34:59]:
So we love you, Tech Metric.
Mike Allen [00:35:01]:
We do love techmetric tech. It's also without a doubt, like, hands down, there is no argument. The superior automotive shop management software and total shop management solution in the industry.
Braxton Critcher [00:35:20]:
I mean, also the company that allowed me to always and forever hold the title over Mike Allen of who can drive a car faster. So thank you.
Mike Allen [00:35:37]:
That's some bullshit right there, man. Why you got. Why you got.
Braxton Critcher [00:35:39]:
I mean, I will say I might can drive a car faster, but hey, congratulations, you can drive the side by side faster in the dirt.
Bryan Pollock [00:35:48]:
You know what I've always noticed is.
Braxton Critcher [00:35:49]:
Like, you can go 35 miles an hour, Mike. Good for you.
Mike Allen [00:35:52]:
When it comes to, like, faster than you.
Bryan Pollock [00:35:54]:
One thing I've always noticed, like, when you. If you go snowmobiling with women, they tend to ride faster because they're actually ignorant of the. Of the consequences.
Mike Allen [00:36:02]:
I realize how close to death they are.
Bryan Pollock [00:36:04]:
Yeah, Yeah, I was.
Mike Allen [00:36:05]:
We were, we were snowballing Braxton. A woman.
Bryan Pollock [00:36:07]:
Yeah, I did.
Braxton Critcher [00:36:08]:
Not the first time.
Bryan Pollock [00:36:09]:
Yeah, I was.
Braxton Critcher [00:36:10]:
I mean, I am drinking coffee.
Bryan Pollock [00:36:12]:
I will say I was snowmobiling with Jim and his family one time, and I remember his daughter Caroline was riding this panther 440, like 85 miles an hour. Like, it took me forever. She missed the turn. I had to catch up to her. I was like, oh, my gosh. It's like, how's this kid?
Mike Allen [00:36:26]:
Braxton and I went to a track event with Tech Metric at Speed Vegas during Apex and SEMA and we got to do hot laps on a GT3RS and you were like 7/10 of a second faster than me. You like, it was significant. It wasn't a little bit. It was a big gap on a laugh. That's like a minute and 13 seconds. It was, it was a lot.
Braxton Critcher [00:36:48]:
I. I'm gonna, I'm gonna pull up the photo that I took because don't want to make it worse for you, Mike, but pretty sure it was more than 7/10 of a second.
Mike Allen [00:36:57]:
Just letting you know, dude, I'm gonna, I'm gonna. So the same thing like at the go kart track. Now my son is faster than me, and it's because of body weight difference. I think my extra hundred pounds made the difference.
Braxton Critcher [00:37:09]:
Yeah, that's it. Yeah, that's it. No doubt.
Bryan Pollock [00:37:12]:
Well, that's, that's arguable on the go kart. Although you should be able to. Well, no, yeah, there's really nothing you can do about that.
Mike Allen [00:37:19]:
Like, I can still. I'm still faster than My daughter, but she doesn't have the. The strength to muscle the card around, you know, but my son. Yeah, whatever.
Braxton Critcher [00:37:27]:
Okay, first lap, and I had the GTRX.
Mike Allen [00:37:37]:
Yeah, GTR.
Braxton Critcher [00:37:38]:
It was a GT3, right?
Mike Allen [00:37:39]:
Yeah, yeah.
Bryan Pollock [00:37:40]:
GT3RS.
Mike Allen [00:37:42]:
Yeah.
Braxton Critcher [00:37:43]:
I was a minute and 4.2, 0.025. Mike. 105.67. So second and a half.
Mike Allen [00:37:57]:
Six, seven, six, seven.
Bryan Pollock [00:38:01]:
Second and a half.
Braxton Critcher [00:38:03]:
Yeah.
Mike Allen [00:38:04]:
I blame my instructor.
Bryan Pollock [00:38:06]:
Oh, that's a long time.
Mike Allen [00:38:07]:
No, I blame. I blame traffic. I. A lot of passing. A lot of passing, you know, and that always slows you down when you have to get off your line for passing.
Bryan Pollock [00:38:16]:
Nah. Fastest car is the one you don't own, Mike.
Mike Allen [00:38:19]:
So last confession that I'm gonna share for the episode is going to be one that I actually shared at ASTA in an episode with Mimby Dowd and Tena Haynes, the incoming president and vice president of the association. And this is being published on the 30th. So as of this publication, I have less than 48 hours left of my presidency of ASTA. And then, thankfully for the association, MIMBY will be in charge. But I do want to play the story about the time that I showed my balls to a customer. So here we go. So this is about 15 years ago at Carfix. And at the time, I had a little Shih Tzu.
Mike Allen [00:39:08]:
It was a package deal. I got married, and it came with two Shih Tzus. And one of them was epileptic. And so he would have seizures occasionally. And when he was sick, I would bring him to shop with me. So. Because I don't want him to be home and in a kennel by himself having seizures, right? But he'd start to get agitated right before it would happen, and he would. He would just start running, and he started to lose his sight, and he would end up running into a corner and just like headbutting into a corner until he fell over the Grand Malls, right? It was really sad.
Mike Allen [00:39:35]:
But it was that time of year at the shop when the big wolf spiders were coming out, you know, and. And so I'm an arachnophobe one. And I still thought I was Skinny Mike, but I was not Skinny Mike anymore. So I was still wearing Skinny Mike pants. I hadn't admitted that I needed to move up to 36s, and I had. So these are all details that come into play in a minute. And I had sticky traps in the corners to catch mice, whatever, right at the shop. And so I'm talking to a customer it's 15 years ago.
Mike Allen [00:40:16]:
Okay, this is really bad. Talking to a customer at the front counter and the dog start. I'm like, oh, he's about to have a seizure. And before I can turn around and get him, he runs into the corner because that's what he does. And he gets stuck onto a sticky trap. And I feel so bad for him. And I lean over in the corner to pick him up and so my back's to my customer now and. And I pick him up and I lean over and I split my pants from belt to zipper all the way across.
Mike Allen [00:40:53]:
And, yeah, just seam all at once, just like, like that. And I am commando.
Braxton Critcher [00:41:06]:
A hairy, red headed butt.
Mike Allen [00:41:08]:
All right. And it gets worse from this point.
Braxton Critcher [00:41:11]:
It can't.
Mike Allen [00:41:13]:
I pick up a dog having a grand mall seizure, foaming at the mouth, stuck to a sticky trap with my balls hanging out to my customer. This is not true. I'm like, stop it. I have to, like, separate. Separate his paws from the sticky trap. And I finally get him separated and I sent him down. And now my hand stuck to the sticky trap. My back's still to my customer as this is all happening.
Mike Allen [00:41:39]:
And I look down the sticky trap and there are three big wolf spiders stuck to the sticky trap. And I start screaming like a little. And I'm jumping around, trying to fling it off my hand with my balls flapping around the back of my. And I finally get it separated and I throw it down and I pick up my dog and I don't even turn around to look at my customer. And I just look over to my technician who's standing there just like. And I say, I'm going to the house. I'll be back in 20 minutes. And I walk out the back door of the shop.
Mike Allen [00:42:17]:
I wouldn't have told nobody that. You could have left that 15 years ago. I can't even look you in the eye no more. Most embarrassing moment of my life.
Bryan Pollock [00:42:30]:
Thank goodness you had a back door to that area. What would you have done without the back door?
Mike Allen [00:42:35]:
I would have just died.
Bryan Pollock [00:42:36]:
So you would have just died.
Mike Allen [00:42:38]:
Neil Meyer of Tread Partners and the Gain Traction podcast. At the time, he was the store manager for my father's other store.
Bryan Pollock [00:42:48]:
Right? Yeah, we interviewed him one time. Right?
Mike Allen [00:42:50]:
Yeah. And so I was talking to Tanika and Neil at an ASTA meeting shortly after that episode posted, and he said, I can vouch that that story is absolutely true because the other guys at the shop immediately called me to recount the story through gust of uncontrollable laughter and like, but I didn't even make it home before my phone was blowing up with people from the other store calling to mock me for what had happened.
Braxton Critcher [00:43:20]:
And you didn't have security cameras at the time.
Mike Allen [00:43:23]:
We did not have lobby cameras at the time.
Bryan Pollock [00:43:25]:
Oh, my God.
Mike Allen [00:43:26]:
Thank you, Jesus.
Braxton Critcher [00:43:28]:
Can you imagine, dude?
Bryan Pollock [00:43:30]:
Oh, that is so amazing. Everything, I love everything about that story.
Braxton Critcher [00:43:36]:
Yeah, I've heard it. Mike told me that story a few months before the episode, like when it was recorded. And I died then I died during the recording. I've played it four or five times to other friends. The whole time is funny. You just can't. You cannot get over that story. It just doesn't get better.
Mike Allen [00:43:56]:
My 13 year old camera. My 13 year old is sitting just off camera and he just heard it for the first time. He's heard it referenced a couple of times. But so imagine you've never heard this story. It's about your dad and it has cursing and my balls repeatedly reference. I'm pretty sure he's failing to breathe right now. So.
Braxton Critcher [00:44:20]:
Anyway, yeah, so it's been a good year. There's been a lot of good recordings. Could you, if you. Mike, a year ago, because you had been thinking we had. We recorded a couple episodes that never got released at. At Vegas last year. Apex last year, because you were thinking about this show and so this was in the works for two or three months before it actually happened. If you, a year ago today could look back and forecast the future, like, do you.
Braxton Critcher [00:44:50]:
Where do you, like, what do you think would have happened and what are you like, reacting to it now?
Bryan Pollock [00:44:57]:
And could you ever imagine telling a story about your balls falling out?
Mike Allen [00:45:01]:
Yeah, I don't think I ever thought that it would be as much fun. Certainly didn't realize how much work it was going to be. It's way more work than I thought it was going to be. And 100.
Braxton Critcher [00:45:18]:
You just get a better producer, you wouldn't have to do as much.
Mike Allen [00:45:20]:
Well, you know, I was about to actually say something genuinely nice. I say 100. It would not be what it is without the two of you, because I couldn't do any of the that y' all do. And so thank you so much for what you guys do. I really appreciate that. I tease you a lot, Braxton, just because that's for better, for worse, just the nature of our relationship. But I mean, you're so good at what you do, dude. And you know, Brian, I think.
Mike Allen [00:45:48]:
I think we make a really good odd couple. Right? I'm sure. I play. I play into the ESO stereotype. Some as part of the shtick. Right.
Bryan Pollock [00:45:55]:
But I play into the eye rolling.
Mike Allen [00:45:57]:
I am absolutely the non technical shop owner. I am absolutely motivated by making money, which is not a bad thing. It's. It doesn't make me evil as long as I'm trying to do it. Honestly.
Bryan Pollock [00:46:09]:
No, you're evil.
Mike Allen [00:46:10]:
And you are absolutely the technically minded shop owner and the technician turned shop owner.
Bryan Pollock [00:46:16]:
I know just enough to be dangerous.
Mike Allen [00:46:19]:
You know enough to know that. Which makes you an outlier because there's so many of you sons of bitch texts out there that think you know it all. Don't know shit. What?
Bryan Pollock [00:46:31]:
All you got to do is play one reel. Talking about balancing tires and they all come out of the woodwork.
Mike Allen [00:46:39]:
We tried to Justin and Jim four times before we got a usable episode. That's crazy.
Bryan Pollock [00:46:46]:
That is a fact. That is an absolute fact.
Mike Allen [00:46:51]:
Other things that we've learned in the last year. One, The Mazda Miata is the sexiest car ever made. It is the perfect sports car. You know what the stand for? Do you know what Miata stands for?
Bryan Pollock [00:47:02]:
No.
Mike Allen [00:47:03]:
Miata is always the answer. Miata.
Bryan Pollock [00:47:11]:
So interesting.
Mike Allen [00:47:13]:
Get some. Get some.
Bryan Pollock [00:47:15]:
I was going to guess it stood for fix it again.
Braxton Critcher [00:47:17]:
We learned how to record an episode in a hotel room.
Mike Allen [00:47:22]:
Yeah. And Braxton also flirted with getting involved in feet finder. Also during that.
Bryan Pollock [00:47:28]:
He was running around barefoot the whole time. Borderline uncomfortable. I'm like, what is going on here?
Braxton Critcher [00:47:37]:
Had the casting couch.
Bryan Pollock [00:47:38]:
Yeah. Braxton's got the case.
Braxton Critcher [00:47:40]:
I was barefoot. Low lighting. It was.
Bryan Pollock [00:47:43]:
The lighting was terrible.
Braxton Critcher [00:47:45]:
We were leaning into it all the way, baby.
Mike Allen [00:47:47]:
There was a mood. There was definitely a mood to be.
Bryan Pollock [00:47:49]:
Yeah, it was. If that's what you want to call it. Oh, my gosh.
Mike Allen [00:47:54]:
That was crazy. The hospitality suite was ballerina at Asta Expo sponsored by Confessions of a Shop Owner.
Bryan Pollock [00:48:02]:
I cannot believe you were able to hunt down all that furniture. And I also can't believe that you did such an awesome hospitality suite without one single black light. Black light in there to blow the COVID on the furniture.
Mike Allen [00:48:15]:
No, no. When you're buying. When you're buying $50 couches off of Facebook Marketplace and like sidewalk pickup couches off, you don't use black lights. You know, you just. Just relax and let it happen.
Bryan Pollock [00:48:28]:
It was amazing.
Mike Allen [00:48:30]:
So. No, it was great. And I'm excited about what next year has in store too. Thankfully, the Raleigh Convention center did not burn down to the ground. It was just a localized fire in the HVA system on the roof units. So we will have the expo there again so we can have Infections hospitality suite.
Bryan Pollock [00:48:50]:
The first text message I got about that was, looks like we're going back to Embassy Suites, baby.
Braxton Critcher [00:48:59]:
Roaches in my room.
Bryan Pollock [00:49:00]:
I'm like, you are way too excited. No, that's not. That's not the roach place. The Embassy Suites was the place before that.
Braxton Critcher [00:49:07]:
Oh, was it? Okay, yeah, the.
Mike Allen [00:49:11]:
All of that stuff. That was the hospitality suite. There's a second floor at one of the shops and we've turned it into the Carfax lounge and bar. So we've got the full arcade and all the couches. We got a big. The big poker table set up. And we actually do team meetings there a couple times a month and we'll order and take out and hang out up there.
Bryan Pollock [00:49:32]:
Oh, nice.
Mike Allen [00:49:32]:
Yeah. So dual purpose, but it's pretty cool. We did have another episode where there were not any audio or video limitations, but it still will never reach the airwaves. We made a. An executive decision to not go with it. Brian, do you want. Do you want to share about that?
Bryan Pollock [00:49:58]:
The greatest. The greatest hot mic moment I've ever heard in my life. It was so amazing. So we recorded with somebody and I did my typical thing. Every time they said something that didn't make sense to me, I interrupted them, which is my specialty because I have.
Braxton Critcher [00:50:14]:
Which apparently happened a lot, a lot on this recording.
Bryan Pollock [00:50:17]:
Like, yeah, it was. It was bad. But I've. I mean, what do you want, man? I'm freaking handicapped. I have weapons grade adhd. What do you want for me? And so anyways, this guy, he was having a little bit of a technology problem. So he was. He had video going on one laptop, but he had.
Bryan Pollock [00:50:40]:
He had his audio, his microphone going on the other laptop. So he slams the laptop down, we're done. He, like, shuts the laptop that we're doing the video on and goes straight to grumble us for, like.
Mike Allen [00:50:54]:
Like screaming across the house to his wife about, what a waste of time. That.
Bryan Pollock [00:50:58]:
Waste of time. Holy.
Mike Allen [00:51:00]:
These dumb motherfuckers.
Bryan Pollock [00:51:02]:
Yeah.
David Roman [00:51:02]:
Yeah.
Bryan Pollock [00:51:03]:
And Mike's. Mike's looking at me. We look. We both look like deer in the headlights looking at each other like, oh. And then Mike tried to record it, but apparently on Zencaster, if you try to start another recording, it boots everybody out. So.
Mike Allen [00:51:15]:
So he closed. He closed the laptop down, thinking that it would just turn off and he'd be out of the meeting. Right?
Bryan Pollock [00:51:21]:
But the audio one was, like, still going.
Mike Allen [00:51:23]:
We assumed the same thing, right? But. So I make eye contact with him and I can still hear his audio, but he's not yet yelling about what morons we are. And so I just look at Brian.
Bryan Pollock [00:51:32]:
And I go, yeah, gives. Gives it a thumbs down, given the.
Mike Allen [00:51:35]:
Thumbs down on the whole episode. And then he starts yelling to his wife and she's what? And so he's repeating himself and we're like, frozen.
Bryan Pollock [00:51:45]:
We are frozen for the longest five seconds in Hot Mic history. We're, like, just staring at each other like, is this really happening?
Braxton Critcher [00:51:55]:
Have we not learned that the best content always happens after you press stop? Always leave it going.
Bryan Pollock [00:52:04]:
I wish we had it recorded so we could use it for an outro every episode.
Mike Allen [00:52:09]:
Oh, my God. If we could have him going, what a waste of my time for every.
Bryan Pollock [00:52:15]:
Outro, that would be amazing.
Mike Allen [00:52:18]:
It was amazing.
Bryan Pollock [00:52:19]:
It was so awesome. Oh, I. It was so funny. I couldn't be in a bad mood for, like, five days after that. There was nothing that irritated me for five days straight. I thought it was so great. I was just like, oh, my gosh. Thing that's ever happened Anyway.
Mike Allen [00:52:37]:
Well, okay, so what's 2026 hold? What is. What is. What does the next year look like for us? We're going. Obviously, we'll be at Expo. Unless, you know, a comment hits us. We're going to do the hospitality suite again. Bigger, better. We're going to go to Vision.
Mike Allen [00:52:52]:
I'm pretty sure we're doing Tools, right? We're going to Tools. Doesn't matter whether or not we can record at Tools.
Bryan Pollock [00:52:58]:
We can record at Tools. We can borrow some Amish buggy. We'll have. Oh, we could have a Amish Amish.
Mike Allen [00:53:04]:
We're not going to Lancaster again. We're not in Lancaster.
Braxton Critcher [00:53:07]:
Oh, well, I know it's at the Hershey Resort, right?
Bryan Pollock [00:53:10]:
Yeah, there's Amish there, too.
Mike Allen [00:53:12]:
Can we get a chocolate fondue tower and I can just dip myself into it.
Bryan Pollock [00:53:18]:
No, no, that's not how that works.
Mike Allen [00:53:21]:
There's lots of chocolate there.
Bryan Pollock [00:53:22]:
I've actually been there before. Pretty cool.
Mike Allen [00:53:25]:
All right, in January, we're going. We're going to be at Elites Ignite event in April, we're going to be at Tectonic and Fueling Connections.
Braxton Critcher [00:53:37]:
I'll have a probably, you know, something with. Oh, we're metric on me.
Mike Allen [00:53:45]:
We're. We're getting.
Braxton Critcher [00:53:46]:
Be looking out for that.
Mike Allen [00:53:49]:
Don't ever show me your belly again. That was gross.
Braxton Critcher [00:53:51]:
I didn't show it to you.
Mike Allen [00:53:52]:
I just, you know, I saw it in the replay. You'll see a little skin. It's weird.
Bryan Pollock [00:53:56]:
Thank goodness. I have this funky setup and I can't see Braxton behind my camera tripod. Oh, my gosh, she just hit the button again.
Mike Allen [00:54:04]:
Ignite. Tectonic tools. Vision Expo Apex. If there's somewhere else that we need to be and we hadn't thought about it, let me know just before we go. I mean, we're almost up on an hour, so we don't have too much time. What's your favorite time? What's your favorite moment from. From the year, Braxton?
Braxton Critcher [00:54:28]:
Oh, hands down, you know, your balls flapping in the wind. Because, because, because you. Like I said, you told me that story, and we were both kind of waiting for the right moment. And during that recording with MIMBY and Tanika, I was not thinking, oh, this is perfect. But it was. Because if you go back to listen to that whole episode, you talked about boobs and all this crazy stuff, it was just the perfect time to bring that up.
Mike Allen [00:54:58]:
You know, Mby afterwards said, you know, when I went on Josh's show, I felt like I could share it with my family and friends and be proud of it. And I can't tell them about this recording.
Bryan Pollock [00:55:08]:
Oh, stop. It's fine.
Braxton Critcher [00:55:09]:
I think Dan Tekin also said that.
Mike Allen [00:55:12]:
I believe it. I believe it.
Bryan Pollock [00:55:13]:
He might have said that.
Mike Allen [00:55:17]:
I think for me, it might have been watching all of the angry technicians lose their mind. When Brian said that if you don't know how to road force, mountain balance, four tires, road force balanced, and an hour and 1.2 or whatever it was, then you're just a. And they all lost their mind. That was. That was pretty amazing for me.
Bryan Pollock [00:55:43]:
Oh, yeah, yeah. When I said it's a. Quit crying. It's embarrassing. Yeah, yeah, it's. It's pretty bad. It was. And that is one of my.
Bryan Pollock [00:55:52]:
You know, anytime you talk about doing something that requires a little extra effort and a reasonable amount of time, all the, all the 42 year old lube techs, they come all come out of the work. Hilarious.
Mike Allen [00:56:06]:
I guess something that we've talked about multiple times this year that came up again today that I think is relevant. Technician wanted 3 hours of customer pay diag time. Because I give away the first hour of diag and then we charge for additional hours. Right. They wanted three hours of pay.
Bryan Pollock [00:56:25]:
Was actually four. Was it actually. Oh, so they wanted three of customer pay. So it's four hours diag. What were they doing that took four.
Mike Allen [00:56:32]:
Hours to learn about system operation and process so that they could then test it.
Bryan Pollock [00:56:39]:
On what?
Mike Allen [00:56:40]:
I don't. I Don't fucking know. Doesn't matter. You don't get paid for your time to learn a system because you don't know how to do it.
Bryan Pollock [00:56:45]:
And plus, why it don't take that long. Do you have all data?
Mike Allen [00:56:51]:
Yes. And identifix.
Bryan Pollock [00:56:53]:
So they just type it in the search bar and they click on Description Operation. And the longest article I've ever seen was like 22 pages. It ain't four hours of reading. So copy and paste that shit in a chat, gtp, tell it to summarize it for you, and freaking get on with life.
Mike Allen [00:57:06]:
The point. Yeah, well, I mean, yeah, that's actually a really useful. Yeah, useful.
Bryan Pollock [00:57:13]:
It's more than just a Snapchatter anyway.
Mike Allen [00:57:15]:
But like, by that logic, because like, this was a thing with Paul Danner a few years ago, right, Talking about whether or not tech should get paid for their time while they're learning how a system works. So if I need three hours to learn how the system works and the customer should pay for that three hours this time. The next time I work on a car with that system, I know how it works so that customer doesn't have to pay the three hours, but the next time a car with that system comes in and it has a problem and there are two techs in the shop, one who knows how it works and one who doesn't. If the tech who knows how it works is busy and it gets dispatched to the other tech, then it cost the customer more to go to the less knowledgeable technician than to go to the one who does who is more knowledgeable.
Bryan Pollock [00:58:00]:
Every job has a certain amount of value, and I don't, I don't know how to determine that certain amount of value. But I do know one thing. It is not worth $3 to chase down an evap code or 3 hours chase down evap code.
Mike Allen [00:58:13]:
Yeah, I think we just, we accidentally flared off into a regular episode conversation rather than a review of the last year.
Bryan Pollock [00:58:20]:
I know.
Braxton Critcher [00:58:21]:
Yeah, I kind of went to sleep. I'm back.
Bryan Pollock [00:58:24]:
There's problem.
Mike Allen [00:58:24]:
That's what I'm like on a shenanigans call when they start talking technical.
Bryan Pollock [00:58:28]:
If you're 3 hours and 5 parts into a basic, that's basically a problem on a Chevy. That's a you problem, not the customer.
Braxton Critcher [00:58:36]:
Sorry, that's me. Every time our, our podcast group chat just goes off with Lucas and Jeff and Josh and all you like, it happened today. 500 messages. And I'm just like, it wasn't 500.
Bryan Pollock [00:58:53]:
It was probably 27.
Mike Allen [00:58:54]:
I think it Was. It was. It was more than 50 messages, and there were multiple voice memos.
Bryan Pollock [00:59:00]:
Let me guess. Braxton wanted three hours to go through the messages to learn how they worked.
Braxton Critcher [00:59:06]:
Yeah, I almost. I almost sent Mike an invoice for my time.
Mike Allen [00:59:10]:
I will be honest with you. I looked down at one point, and I had missed three consecutive voice memos, and they were all over two minutes. And I was like, nope, nope.
Bryan Pollock [00:59:18]:
Note.
Mike Allen [00:59:19]:
Yeah, I'll just pick up the. I'll just pick up this group chat tomorrow.
Bryan Pollock [00:59:23]:
The only way you can get there from here is if you're driving.
Mike Allen [00:59:26]:
Yeah, that helps.
Bryan Pollock [00:59:27]:
That's the only way you can make it happen.
Mike Allen [00:59:28]:
Yeah.
Bryan Pollock [00:59:29]:
Yeah.
Braxton Critcher [00:59:30]:
Well, before we do stop, Mike, I just. If. If people will go back and look at the first five or six episodes and then look at, like, the couple lately we've released from Vegas or APEC or. Or asta.
Mike Allen [00:59:48]:
Yeah.
Braxton Critcher [00:59:48]:
Like, I have to say, your ability, Mike, to. To set up equipment has drastically improved. Because the first couple episodes, you set up what looked like to be perhaps a gas station bathroom and invited guests in.
Bryan Pollock [01:00:09]:
Well, and then just recorded in a gas station bathroom, I think. Didn't we?
Mike Allen [01:00:13]:
No.
Bryan Pollock [01:00:13]:
Where was that? Oh, maybe it was a hotel lobby or something, man.
Braxton Critcher [01:00:17]:
We tried that.
Mike Allen [01:00:18]:
We had some. Hey, what did we. Did we actually record in the lobby of that hotel at Fuel?
Braxton Critcher [01:00:23]:
We did, yeah. For like, 20 minutes. Yeah.
Mike Allen [01:00:25]:
Did we get any content? We never published it, did we?
Braxton Critcher [01:00:28]:
No, it was, like, 20 minutes, and people were ready to go, and by the time we got set up, it took 45 minutes. Everybody was out.
Mike Allen [01:00:34]:
I blame you.
Braxton Critcher [01:00:36]:
It was my fault.
Mike Allen [01:00:37]:
Who did we record with in Vegas in 24?
Braxton Critcher [01:00:41]:
Because I remember Allen, myself, and you did an episode that was just kind of supposed to be a. Yeah, it was a.
Mike Allen [01:00:51]:
It was. It was a pilot. Yeah. Was it any good? I don't remember that conversation. It didn't leave. Yeah.
Braxton Critcher [01:00:59]:
You, Justin, me, all three together. Probably not.
Mike Allen [01:01:02]:
Yeah. I'm gonna go with. It was probably just, like, Justin being, like, charming.
Braxton Critcher [01:01:06]:
Yeah, it was Justin. Justin carried it for sure.
Darren Barney [01:01:08]:
Anyway.
Bryan Pollock [01:01:08]:
Yeah, but.
Braxton Critcher [01:01:09]:
But, like, you know, going into. So I. I. Going into something like this, like, to have a successful show, you gotta have people that, like, you guys were talking about, have good camaraderie. You know, you have good back and forth, but you're not afraid to, like, to talk about your mistakes, to be. Be you. Like, you know, when you put a camera in front of yourself and a mic here, people. Most people clam up, but you guys have been fantastic.
Braxton Critcher [01:01:40]:
And, of course, I'm Biased. You know, I'm the editor of the show.
Mike Allen [01:01:43]:
But of all the podcasts you work with. Of all the podcasts you work. Oh, boy.
Braxton Critcher [01:01:48]:
You can't ask the podcast you guys work with.
Mike Allen [01:01:51]:
No, no, no, no. All of all the podcasts you, Braxton, work with, which one's your favorite?
Braxton Critcher [01:01:58]:
I would clearly have to say the weight of manhood. Weight of manhood.
Mike Allen [01:02:04]:
Yeah.
Bryan Pollock [01:02:10]:
That podcast sounds amazing for anybody but me. Guys, just have fun with that one. I. Manhood.
Mike Allen [01:02:20]:
So do you use, like, one of those little scales you use for. For measuring weed or. He's like. Like, these big dudes or what?
Braxton Critcher [01:02:27]:
It's more like, you know, those. Those, like, luggage, like, scales you can, like, attach to your luggage up to £50. Yeah, yeah. It's like you attach it to the.
Mike Allen [01:02:38]:
Top, and you clearly hang with dudes that are, like. I mean, bigger than me.
Bryan Pollock [01:02:42]:
I mean, hang. Hang with dudes. Yep.
Mike Allen [01:02:45]:
A bunch of Hungarians.
Bryan Pollock [01:02:47]:
Wait.
Mike Allen [01:02:50]:
Fair enough. You're like, the living embodiment. Or that podcast is the living embodiment of that one meme that was hot during the pandemic. You know the meme. Actually, Braxton probably doesn't know the meme.
Bryan Pollock [01:03:02]:
He might.
Mike Allen [01:03:03]:
Pure as the driven snow. Well, I think on that note, I.
Bryan Pollock [01:03:08]:
Think on that bombshell.
Mike Allen [01:03:13]:
I'm excited for 2026, guys. It's gonna be fun.
Braxton Critcher [01:03:15]:
Yeah, me too.
Mike Allen [01:03:17]:
Hopefully people like it. We'll see. I don't know. Maybe. Thanks for listening to Confessions of a Shop Owner, where we lay it all out. The good, the bad, and sometimes the super messed up. I'm your host, Mike Allen, here to remind you that even the pros screw it up sometimes. So why not laugh a little bit, learn a little bit, and maybe have another drink? You got a confession of your own or a topic you'd like me to cover? Or do you just want to let me know what an idiot I am? Email mikeonfessionsofashopowner.com or call and leave a message.
Mike Allen [01:03:42]:
The number 704-confess. That's 704-266-3377. If you enjoy this episode, be sure to, like, subscribe or follow. Join us on this crazy journey that is shop ownership. I'll see you on the next episode. You know, I said just.
Bryan Pollock [01:04:26]:
You know, I said, Jess.