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Motherhood asks us to do it all, but what if the real strength is in just being?
This is Leaning into Being. Erika Hanafin, mom, stepmom, founder, and co-parent hosts alongside Amri Kibbler, mother, founder, and cancer survivor.
We get it. Motherhood is beautiful chaos. And whether you're juggling babies in business, toddlers in to-do lists, or just trying to catch your breath. We're here for it. All of it, the real, the raw and the moments that make it all worth it. Each episode focuses on relatable situations, resources, and experiences to help you balance the beautiful chaos of motherhood and ambition. This show is designed for all mamas seeking community and connection in her definition of success.
This is Leaning Into Being.
[00:00:00] Nicole Young: In the moments, the moments, you know, the going into labor, the giving birth, that, that part was not pretty. I'm grateful every day that my husband was an advocate because I don't know that I would even be here had he not been that person. So I'm grateful that my son, Thankfully was born without issue.
There was some things that went on with that, that again, it's just blessings. I think I don't even want to think of it as luck. I think of it as blessings because I know circumstances where some people's children didn't make it where the moms didn't make it. So I'm grateful to be alive. That was Rocky.
I am Erika. and I'm Amri. This is Leaning Into Being the podcast for mamas who know that real strength isn't just in doing, but in being be you. Be present, just be.
[00:00:47] Erika Hanafin: Amri, on today's Leaning Into Being podcast episode, we are sitting down with Nicole Young. She is the CEO and co founder of the highest rated flavored whiskey brand, Frisky Whiskey. She is the first and only black woman to own a flavored whiskey brand.
[00:01:05] Amri Kibbler: Nicole is also a lauded voice of authority in the lifestyle space. She hosts and produces broadcast content for the likes of E! News, ABC, World News Now, and The Morning Blend. She's also written articles for Huffington Post, Bustle Digital Group, and USA Weekend.
[00:01:24] Erika Hanafin: And she's incredibly passionate about a number of other topics around flavor. She loves developing recipes. She likes creating healthy eating habits, and has a lot new project coming out that we will want to hear about flavor for good.
[00:01:42] Amri Kibbler: And with so much on her plate, I can't wait to hear about how she also takes time for herself and how she leans into being.
[00:01:49] Erika Hanafin: Let's get started.
[00:01:50] Amri Kibbler: Thank you.
[00:01:56] Erika Hanafin: Well, Nicole, welcome to our Hello Mamas podcast. Let's start with your journey into motherhood. Can you share a little bit about stepping into this role as a mother?
[00:02:08] Nicole Young: Well, other than the fact that thank the Lord, I still have the part. So stepping into, because that role, no stepping into the role of motherhood has been the greatest joy of my life.
[00:02:21] Nicole Young: It is the hardest work, as you ladies know, all too well as any person can do, but. It is truly the best work. It's the greatest blessing. I'm grateful every day to have it. With that said, it is the hardest work and doing that work while doing professional entrepreneurship work is the Lord's work. No, is very, very hard, is hard work.
[00:02:48] Nicole Young: It's been both gratifying, also humbling at the same time. I am someone who. I did a lot of things professionally before becoming a mom, and I'm very grateful for that because I feel like sometimes the speed that you need to do a lot of things. I'm someone who likes to do a lot of things at once. I was raised to put all your talents to work, WORK and ERK.
[00:03:14] Nicole Young: No, to put 'em to work while you can, if you know how to do something and you can monetize it and it's not gonna drive you insane and it's not too far away from. The other things like there is no one day job. Use your day to do what you know how to do. That's what I was raised to do. That's what I saw my parents do.
[00:03:32] Nicole Young: So for me, it's like the speed that I had before motherhood for many reasons to do all those things. I'm so glad that I, that I did those things because becoming a mom. It felt like it was easy at first. I was blessed that, you know, I, I didn't have a baby at 25. I was what they consider a little older. I didn't have trouble conceiving.
[00:03:56] Nicole Young: I had trouble getting him out. Some of that no joke is just due to, and I say this lightheartedly, but is not a joke. It is due to giving birth while being black. It's a different set of rules. It's a different ball game and it poses different challenges. And so in the moments, the moments, you know, the going into labor, the giving birth, the that part was not pretty.
[00:04:20] Nicole Young: I'm grateful every day that my husband was an advocate because I don't know that I would even be here had he not been that person. So. I'm grateful that my son, thankfully was born without issue. There was some things that went on with that that again, it's just blessings. I think. I don't even wanna think of it as luck.
[00:04:38] Nicole Young: I think of it as blessings. 'cause I know circumstances where some people's children didn't make it, where the moms didn't make it. So I'm grateful to be alive. That was rocky. The recovery from that, he was rocky. He's seven and a half, and sometimes I'm like, damn, I'm still recovering from that. And I mean, in the physical sense, not pretty at all.
[00:04:58] Nicole Young: So. That also I think, gave me a baseline for what this whole journey is. You know, you hear, and I heard constantly that, you know, if you, if you have a, a natural delivery, which I don't even know what that means, but if you have a natural delivery, then you should be back to normal in six weeks. That's a lie.
[00:05:19] Nicole Young: That's a straight up lie. That is a happenstance for some people. That is by no means any kind of gauge that anyone should have. So. Just that sort of misconception from the beginning. I feel like once I came out of that, it set me up to understand that like none of the things that people tell you are normal.
[00:05:42] Nicole Young: There's no normal, there's no normalcy. Every single part of this is a rolling, a rolling set of facts and and occurrences, and you just have to roll with it and you can't stay. Angry too long. You can't stay. I can't say you can't stay in pain too long, but you can't stay. Just tolerate whatever is hurting you without looking for solutions for too long.
[00:06:05] Nicole Young: And that's the same in business. So the journey has been, and like I said, I'm grateful for all of that. I'm grateful for the knowledge that has come with all of that. So the journey has been rough, but also full of blessings and triumphs and joy. Gratitude.
[00:06:21] Amri Kibbler: It's a motherhood rollercoaster, right? It's all of the things.
[00:06:25] Amri Kibbler: It's like pushes your emotions to the highs and the lows and things that you never really thought that you could manage to navigate and get through and, and all of those things. So Nicole, uh, the name of our podcast is Leaning Into Being, what does that mean for you? You have such a full life. What does it mean for you to slow down and take some moments of presence?
[00:06:50] Amri Kibbler: Between all of those many hats that you're wearing.
[00:06:53] Nicole Young: Slow down. Okay. No, I'm kidding. What's that? No. Is that English? No, I'm joking what that means. No, I'm joking because it literally means figuring that out. So I had to learn that. I had to really understand what leaning in to anything meant, because I used to.
[00:07:13] Nicole Young: I used to bust through before, or at least I felt, you know, looking back now, I felt like that that's what I was doing. I was just like, what? I could just do, you know, do anything. No, some things do need to be leaned into. You do have to accept. Acclimate adjust to. So slowing down is one of the things that I had to really understand how to do that and why it's important.
[00:07:35] Nicole Young: So for me what that means is trying to have somewhat of a sort of rigid concept of my schedule and what can fit, and what cannot fit, and what has to reprioritize and when I have to hit a pause. 'cause if you don't pause, then you just start. It's kind of like not stopping at a traffic light. What happened?
[00:07:57] Nicole Young: Crashing accidents everywhere, you know, crashes. So I have had to learn how to slow down and then find things that I can actually slow down and do, because it's easy to say, or at least I used to think it was easy to say, I'm gonna make time to meditate. Well, no, because what does that actually mean?
[00:08:14] Nicole Young: Sitting there and trying to zone out for a while became. Running that list in my head, you know, telling my husband and son like, I need you guys to. Give me, I need that quiet time so I can meditate. But I wasn't really meditating. I was really just making lists in my head and, and doing other work. And so that's not really, you know, that didn't work for me.
[00:08:34] Nicole Young: So figuring out what I can really do to slow myself down, it does that mean trying to figure out. How to get a massage. Trying to figure out when I can maybe do a different workout routine. 'cause even like I said, even the things I do to slow down, sometimes it's like, because it's so routine, I use that time to just do more work.
[00:08:54] Nicole Young: So I have to challenge myself. So maybe now I'm gonna go and do some kickboxing workout. 'cause if I don't pay attention to that and allow myself that brain focus on that slow down stop working. I'm gonna bust my ass, so I have to pay attention to what, you know what I mean? Pay attention to that. It's figuring out what slowing down means and then actually doing those things so that I can recharge, reset, be better, be more focused in the end.
[00:09:22] Erika Hanafin: Let's double click into that. 'cause you mentioned a few things, and I know that you have a philosophy of treating our bodies to the best and how that has clearly tied into your role in finding presence with all of the things and that you have going on. What does that mean for you, and is there a particular practice or place or even recipe that helps you center?
[00:09:47] Nicole Young: Yes. So my whole thing about. Treating your body to the best is, I mean, that across the board, whatever you're doing, it doesn't mean it has to be like the most expensive or the most luxurious. You know, it's best in the relative sense, but it's also what choice can you make that is going to be the best. So if it's about what you're eating, I'm a flavor first kind of girl, but I'm also into mindfulness and it's such a cliche thing, but moderation.
[00:10:15] Nicole Young: So I'm not gonna say that everything that I cook is. 100% organic, but. Because I don't even know if that's always the best, but I do make the choices that I know are the best for my body. I like to listen to my body. I know what makes me feel good when I'm eating it. I find cooking to be, you know, really cathartic.
[00:10:35] Nicole Young: Really like a therapy in addition to something that I'm good at and that I've made work out of. But I like to rely on, you know, I do have a go-to dish, like I love, I love roasted salmon. It's something that I love, the taste of it. I love the texture of salmon. I like the health benefits of. Not every kind of salmon is healthy, but there are health benefits to salmon prepared certain ways.
[00:10:57] Nicole Young: I love dark leafy greens, and I like spice. I like to treat myself to a really great meal with what I love to cook with what I know. My body responds well, I. Two. That's what I mean by the best. I make whiskey. That's one of the things that I do for a living. I'm a whiskey brand. We like to use really quality ingredients in that whiskey.
[00:11:18] Nicole Young: So it's not to say this is some healthy whiskey. There's no such thing as healthy alcohol. By the way, don't let anyone trick you and believing that it's not true. But you can have premium products that are made with, you know, trustworthy ingredients. The, the liquor industry industry is highly regulated, and the Federal Commission that decides what you can call your brand, what you can put on your label, they're very strict about what you can use to consider your product All natural.
[00:11:44] Nicole Young: My whiskey is made with natural ingredients, pure ingredients I don't use. Artificial flavorings or colorings. It's a flavored whiskey. Of course it has sugar in it, but it's pure caramel. It's raw vanilla. Like, I'm not giving you these, you know these, these ingredients, if you look on the website of, it's called TTB, they list ingredients that you can use them, but we're not gonna give you a label that says you're natural.
[00:12:07] Nicole Young: So I want you to be. Putting the best of whatever it is that you're putting into your body. Into your body. If you're doing a workout, I want you to choose a workout that is led by someone who's got the credentials to even be teaching you. 'cause they're gonna give you the best practice. That's different for everyone, but that's what I mean when I say that, and I try to incorporate that into my life and also into things that I put out into the public for consumption and for purchase.
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[00:13:38] Amri Kibbler: Okay. I wanna hear more about Frisky Whiskey. Frisky Whiskey is breaking Barriers as a black female owned brand. How did you tap into the whiskey world as a woman? And what is exciting you most about it now?
[00:13:52] Nicole Young: So. I tapped into the whiskey world. I had been, you know, I've worn various professional hats in the spirits industry, and it's how I actually met my business partner.
[00:14:01] Nicole Young: He and I worked together years ago on his brand at the time was his first brand. So I have had creative director roles in spirits. I have created recipes and cocktails for. Well-known spirits brands, the patrons, the ROCs of the world. And I, you know, had an opportunity to collaborate with my partner on the creation of Frisky Whiskey.
[00:14:22] Nicole Young: We intended for this to be an extension of one of his existing brands of bourbon and whiskey, but. Long story short, it was better than that. It needed its own identity, it needed its own brand. I was really poised to run the brand, and so there was an investor in place who was interested in working with me, and I took the brand over and I created it into what?
[00:14:48] Nicole Young: You see it as today? Not alone, not as an island. With the help, thankfully of my business partner, he is a consulting firm, so they manage other brands. They help bring brands to market and keep them there, so to speak. So I have had a lot of great support and great help, but for me it was really about the opportunity.
[00:15:06] Nicole Young: As you mentioned, to break ground. When I started this project in 2015, there were no black women. Whiskey at all. And since then there have been other women to enter the space. I was the first person to launch a flavored whiskey as a black woman. And so that's a pretty big deal in the sense that flavored whiskey, just from a business perspective, flavored whiskey is one of the fastest growing categories.
[00:15:32] Nicole Young: Spirits. So last year alone, there were 21 million cases of flavored whiskey sold. In the United States, you have brands like Crown Royal. You know, one of their highest selling skews is their apple flavored whiskey, flavored whiskey, outsells rye, and cognac, and brandy, and all these other categories. So for there to be such a small representation of color and then no representation as far as black female ownership.
[00:15:57] Nicole Young: That was extremely exciting for me. The space itself is exciting because as I mentioned, it's fast growing. There's a huge appetite for it, or I should say a thirst for it. On the consumer side, people love flavored whiskeys. It's a great way. For people to incorporate whiskey into their sort of drinking identity, even if they don't drink straight whiskey.
[00:16:17] Nicole Young: What I've been able to do with Frisky is we've created a product that people who've never drank whiskey before who find it so scary and fearful, yet they think the flavored stuff is like too sweet and too off the beaten path for them. They find frisky approachable and welcoming and flavorful, and so I love the innovation that we've been able to create and I like seeing what other people.
[00:16:40] Nicole Young: Are doing in this space now as a result of what they've seen I've been able to do with Frisky.
[00:16:45] Erika Hanafin: I love that. And I mean, we've had Frisky Whiskey at a few of our events and I'm not a whiskey drinker and have definitely was surprised by the flavor of some of the unique cocktails that you made for us. I wanna double click into thank you, by the way.
[00:17:02] Erika Hanafin: Yes, of course. I love hearing that. But I wanna double click into flavor because we have heard you are working on a new give back project flavor for Good. Can you tell us about that?
[00:17:15] Nicole Young: Yes. So Flavor for Good is really just, it's something that I have wanted to do for a long time. It's. An opportunity for me to use my prowess for flavor to benefit organizations that I feel a connection to, that I feel are doing good work.
[00:17:32] Nicole Young: Some of them are organizations that have recognizable names, like I'm very passionate about the Boys and Girls Club of Harlem. I'm very passionate about the American Jazz Museum of Harlem. But you know, there are smaller organizations that are doing equally important work that are. Beginning to grow and get traction and get attention.
[00:17:52] Nicole Young: But I personally feel like there's an organization called buyfromablackwoman.org. As it name suggests, that's what they champion. They champion support for entrepreneurs that are black females and also sort of building buzz and attention for. Entrepreneurs in the space to help them, to help people to buy from black women.
[00:18:13] Nicole Young: So the way I'm doing that is by creating digital products as well as in-person experiences that will raise money for and allow me to make donations. To these organizations. So I'm not at the point where I'm starting an actual.org myself. I'm just looking to create initiatives that will support the DOT orgs and the organizations that I feel personal connection to.
[00:18:35] Nicole Young: So my first project is a cookbook. It's called Bites Camera, action and Bites. Camera action is my top 20 TV ready, but real life, tasty recipes that you can make. At home and easily, you know, accessible ingredients, things that people have heard of. And so what I can do with that project is in addition to donating a portion of every ebook sold, I'm also creating in-person experiences where people can come in, sample the food cooking classes where you can get familiar with the ingredients and the, the recipes, and again, taking.
[00:19:10] Nicole Young: Proceeds and money made from these efforts and putting it specifically towards an organization that I feel passionate about. So I'm excited about the project. I'm excited to be able to collaborate with other culinary minds. I'm working on another book that's going to benefit the American Jazz Museum of Harlem, where I'm gonna tie in recipes from chefs.
[00:19:30] Nicole Young: It's music to your mouth, so to speak. So recipes that have that vibe, that excitement that people feel similar to when they hear their favorite jazz music, and then putting that together as a compilation book and donating proceeds from that to the organization.
[00:19:46] Erika Hanafin: I love that. And oh my goodness, we have to stop talking about food 'cause I am
[00:19:50] Nicole Young: starving now.
[00:19:52] Nicole Young: I should have sent you guys some food. We could have been chatting and at the same time. Oh my gosh. It might not be table manners.
[00:19:59] Amri Kibbler: Next time, next time we'll have for sure.
[00:20:02] Nicole Young: Well I invite, I'll invite you guys to a tasting 'cause that's, we would love that. Oh, what it's all about. I would love for you to come.
[00:20:08] Nicole Young: Yes, absolutely.
[00:20:09] Amri Kibbler: That would've been fun though. We could have had some, some little snacks here. And as someone who has both written and speaks a lot about the art of juggling and all, what advice would you offer to moms who are looking to pursue their own passions as well as their careers?
[00:20:27] Nicole Young: I would first of all encourage any mom that wants to pursue any professional passion while in the depths of motherhood to do that because it seems like.
[00:20:38] Nicole Young: It may feel insurmountable, but there is a lot of joy and a lot of fulfillment that comes from knowing that you are not just caring for your family, but you're also caring for your own, you know, your own personal needs. But I would also say that you want to try your best to be as organized as possible, whatever that means for you.
[00:20:56] Nicole Young: Not everyone can have a personal assistant, but maybe you can have a virtual assistant. Not everyone might be able to have, you know, some big. Office space to go to if you're, if you're self starting, but perhaps you can carve out a corner of your home that is your dedicated space that you can just sort of lock in and use that as your workspace and hopefully keep your other, your other members of your household as far away from that space as possible, if possible.
[00:21:21] Nicole Young: I would also say that if you're looking to start a venture of some sort, you wanna be as. Prepared as you can from a financial perspective. It's not to say that everyone's gonna be able to go out and raise tons of money to do big projects, but you do wanna have budgets sort of laid out, and then a plan to be able to enact those budgets and also sustain them should you not make the money that you plan to make, because.
[00:21:49] Nicole Young: Not every project is going to get off the ground quickly. Not every project is going to be profitable quickly. So you need to be prepared for that as best as possible because that's the surest way to fail, is to not have the resources to continue. You might be onto something, but it does take time to grow concepts and businesses, whatever they may be.
[00:22:09] Nicole Young: And I've done a couple of different businesses, so I can tell you that having that preparation and that it's, it's like a safety net. You have to think of it as to be able to. Sustain your business and to be able to pay the expenses involved in maintaining the business for a period of time, even if you're not being able to put money back in through profits.
[00:22:28] Nicole Young: So I think having that preparation in advance is key. I also think that having some sort of vision, I said in the beginning that, you know, everything is sort of, it's always ever changing and there's no right or sure path that anyone can be on, especially if you're a mom because your life schedule is going to.
[00:22:48] Nicole Young: It's inevitable that it's gonna interfere at some point, crossover, be in the cross hairs with your work schedule. But you do need to have some sort of clear vision of what your timeline is for, you know, what your goals are and what the markers are gonna be for whatever business that you wanna enact.
[00:23:08] Nicole Young: Just so you can gauge whether or not you're on the successful path and have an idea of what, of where you may need to make changes and where you may need to stay the course.
[00:23:17] Erika Hanafin: It's so true. I mean, we've had a number of conversations in our podcast around not only the financial savviness of being an entrepreneur, but also being financially savvy at home.
[00:23:30] Erika Hanafin: Right? You need to look at how important financial literacy is. For, particularly for women, particularly for moms, and being able to ensure that how you're budgeting is going to make sure you're meeting your expenses and what are your needs and satisfying the family and all the things. So it's definitely a relevant conversation whether you are building a business or ensuring the health and sustainability of your family.
[00:24:00] Erika Hanafin: Nicole, I love just connecting with you overall. I can't believe we're almost at time. You have had so many incredible experiences as of late. What is ahead? What are you most excited about, both personally and professionally?
[00:24:17] Nicole Young: Personally, I'm excited about, it's personal and professional. I'm excited about.
[00:24:23] Nicole Young: My new venture, which is Flavor for Good. I'm really excited to have that sort of rollout and be able to feel like I'm putting these skills to work, but I'm putting them to work in another way, which is gonna allow me to do something that I've always wanted to do, which is feel like I'm, you know, putting my talents to, for good use, you know, flavor for good, putting it to, to help other people.
[00:24:44] Nicole Young: But I'm also personally excited about my son finishing second grade. It's like. Every year is, it is just, it's going so fast. Second grade has been, every year feels like, well, this is the first time we're really in big kids school, but this really felt like big kids school, and I'm excited for him to feel like he's completed this really big year for him himself.
[00:25:07] Nicole Young: And. Advancing academically. It's just, it's a great joy to watch your kids. It's bittersweet 'cause it is sad at the same time, but it, it's a great joy watching him do these things and academically move on and move up and I'm excited about that. Professionally, I'm excited about frisky expanding. We're looking into moving into a couple new markets, the, yeah, second and third quarters of the year.
[00:25:32] Nicole Young: So I'm excited about that. I'm excited about bringing the brand to a wider audience and every day is an experience and an opportunity to bring new people over to the frisky side of whiskey, as I like to call it. So I'm looking forward to that. And you know, I'm just grateful to. Be able to do all the things that I do and to every day engage people to be more confident in business, in the kitchen, in motherhood, and just in life in general.
[00:26:03] Amri Kibbler: Amazing. Well, as Erika said, we've come to the end of our conversation, but before we go, we always like to ask this one last question. What is one moment that you either can't believe you survived or that you're still laughing about?
[00:26:18] Nicole Young: It's a little bit of both. I can't believe I survived a fiasco with my brand, so.
[00:26:26] Nicole Young: Long story short, my bottler in Charleston, South Carolina went through some things, their company, and they ended up getting basically like shut down by essentially the US Marshals with hundreds, not tens, but hundreds of my cases of whiskey locked up in their facility. And it's not just, you would think, okay, they're.
[00:26:52] Nicole Young: Dealing with what they're dealing with, but can't I just go in and extract my bottles? And no, because the liquor industry is so highly regulated, restricted, you can't just move liquor from one place to another. So their huge problem quickly became my huge problem. And when I say huge problem, I mean huge problem because I'm a small company, but I am doing big business.
[00:27:16] Nicole Young: So to be able to have people like. Total wine placing orders, but not being able to fulfill those orders because it's not like you can just grab some bottles from somewhere, pour some more whiskey in and send them out. It's one of the obstacles and challenges that. It can, first of all, it can cripple your business.
[00:27:38] Nicole Young: It can put you outta business. But even once you start to figure out a resolution, just emotionally, it's completely taxing. It is really hard. It involves a lot of work. A lot of explaining, like I had a lot of explaining to do because people don't care that that's their problem. My retailers, their problem right now is that they didn't have the bottles to put on the shelf, so somebody else's problem they don't really care about.
[00:28:05] Nicole Young: And I am shocked that I'm still alive. I'm grateful that I'm still in business and that frisky lives to sell another bottle despite that. Nightmare of an occurrence. That is a nightmare.
[00:28:19] Erika Hanafin: Nightmare. Oh my gosh,
[00:28:20] Nicole Young: nightmare. But these are the things that happen in business, and this is why I say you have to make sure that you can sustain your business.
[00:28:27] Nicole Young: That you can maintain your business, and that you have. Hopefully a group of teammates 'cause running a business you at some point you, it does require a team and your teammates have to be willing to play and willing to be solutions based and helpful when crises occur because they're inevitable.
[00:28:45] Erika Hanafin: So true.
[00:28:46] Erika Hanafin: Thank you so much for being on our podcast. It's been a pleasure laughing with you and just enjoying your energy and learning so much about what you have been up to. I can't wait to see all of the things and try your recipes 'cause I'm really hungry.
[00:29:04] Amri Kibbler: I know I'm starving And see all of your things that are coming out.
[00:29:08] Amri Kibbler: I can't wait to check out your cookbook too. So many exciting things. Thank you so much for sharing your afternoon with us.
[00:29:14] Nicole Young: Thank you guys so much. I really appreciate it.
[00:29:19] Voiceover: Mama, you are doing enough. You are enough. So take a breath, lean in, and just be, be you. Be present. Just be.