In this episode, Dani talks about her experience from pre-school to eighth grade in the US education system, as well as what that experience taught her about learning.
For links & recommendations, see full episode notes.
Dani is honest and refreshing in her takes on the world and society. Listen as she explains how she’s come to understand the world through kindness, both towards ourselves and everything else.
[0:00] Hi there friends! Welcome to Understanding Kindness, I’m Dani! You know, this is episode twenty-two and I kinda just breezed through our twentieth episode, and our twenty-first episode without even a mention of this milestone. Now, with episode twenty-two here, I’ve realized how incredible it is that I’ve made over twenty episodes of this little podcast! I’m amazed at myself for my devotion and persistence, and I’m amazed that people are listening and it’s resonating with them! Thank you all for listening and supporting me and this podcast!
[0:41] But, what’s our episode about today? Today I’m going to be talking about learning and my experience in the US education system. This will actually be a little series that I’m doing. So in today’s episode I’ll take you through my years in pre-school through eighth grade. I’ll be discussing any big ideas that I associate with these grades or times in my life. In the next couple episodes I’ll take you through my high school years, and my experience in college and then my life up to now since then. Keep in mind that this account is only my experience. I’d love for you all to hear it and begin questioning what you actually learned from your experience in an education system. There’s so much that happens in our lives during these years and it’s important to talk about how everyday occurrences and struggles impacted our ability to perform in school and actually learn. I’ll start us off with telling my experience here. Welcome to this episode of Understanding Kindness.
[1:47] (Theme).
[1:53] Alright, for our Native segment today we’re talking about some more oil pipelines and how we all can help to defund them. I’ve already mentioned Line 3 in episode 19, and I’ve alluded to the fact that this isn’t the only tar sands oil pipeline currently under construction and threatening the rights and sovereignty of Indigenous peoples. There are a few more being constructed in North America/Turtle Island. We may have heard of the recent one that Biden nixed in his first days of presidency, Keystone XL, which is no different than the ones still currently being constructed, Line 3 owned by Enbridge and Trans Mountain, which is owned by Kinder Morgan. In my research of the Line 3 pipeline, I discovered an Indigenous-led campaign called Mazaska Talks, Mazaska meaning money. Mazaska Talks is invested in divesting funds from banks that are either ensuring these pipelines or straight up funding them. The Mazaska Talks website is full of articles and resources on the importance of divesting, how you can personally divest from your bank if it’s one among the many supporting these pipelines, as well as how to talk to your city about divesting their funds if they’re using one of these banks. It probably will come as no surprise to find out some of these banks’ names, many we’ve heard before for similar reasons. Some of the ones that might sound more familiar include Bank of America/Merrill Lynch, JPMorgan Chase, US Bank, and Wells Fargo. These names probably are not shocking, but what is shocking is how many other banks have followed in their footsteps.
[3:35] I myself, hold my money at a Chase bank currently. I moved my money there from Bank of America around when I was 18 or 19. Bank of America was the one my mom used so that’s just where I opened my first account. Then I had some friends who used Chase and enjoyed it so I moved my money over there. At the time, and for a long time after that, I had absolutely no idea about the implications of where I kept my money. It wasn’t until I came across Mazaska Talks that I learned about how the bank I was using was funding projects that I was firmly against. On the Mazaska Talks website I began to read up on how so many banks were funding these pipelines, as well as other projects that infringe on all of our rights, but especially BIPOC’s rights and lives. I felt an immediate pull to divest my money from Chase as soon as I possibly could. I’ve been researching local credit unions and public banks in my area and have found that they all seem to offer everything I’ve gotten from Chase with the added benefit of investing in my local community. There are actually a lot of small local banks in my area so I’ve been researching them for about 15 minutes a day a few days during the week. I’m hoping to narrow my search down soon and begin my divestment from Chase. I am very excited for that! Then, once I’ve accomplished this, I plan to tell my family and friends about how to divest their money and help them through the process if they need it. Mazaska Talks has a whole host of resources to make the process pretty quick and simple, and the credit unions and public banks, of course, tend to make these processes as simple as possible too. If you’d like to see what banks fund these pipeline projects and other projects that disproportionately affect BIPOC, definitely check out the Mazaska Talks website and start your divestment process as soon as possible! I’ll link the website in the show notes.
[5:34] {Singing} *Shouuuuut-Ouuuuutssss*
Here we are, our patrons’ shining moment! Thank you both so so much for your continued support! I appreciate you both immensely!
And now, back to your regularly scheduled programming.
[5:55] Alrighty, now let’s get started with my preschool years. I don’t remember much of them, but I do remember that I went for 2 years. So, for me, this would be 1998-2000. My preschool was offered through the town, so I went to the town hall to attend. I had a few friends in my classes, but, again, I don’t remember much of them and, obviously, do not stay in touch with these people either. There was a lot of play involved here. I don’t remember any type of school work at all, but this play stage is actually integral in our learning process. This play, really, is socialization, and it’s how we as little human animals learn everything. Whether it’s structured play, like a board game with set goals, or unstructured play, like playing with blocks or running around in the backyard, it’s all extremely important at this stage in our lives. This is when we’re learning how to interact with our peers, and also when we begin to learn about authority outside of our parents. The teachers in these classrooms are supposed to be the authority. This is a very subtle integration and learning experience. We’re not explicitly told that the teacher has authority over us, but rather it’s insinuated when the adults in the room tell you to do something and each of us are expected to obey. This sets us up for the authoritative educational system that we are about to enter into.
[7:26] Next, we’ve got kindergarten (2000-2001). At this stage in my education I entered into an elementary school. I had one kindergarten teacher, who was extremely sweet and I will probably remember forever. Once in kindergarten, we begin the typical “school work”. Yes, we’re playing with our peers, but now we’re also doing arts and crafts projects with educational components, as well as beginning to learn to read. This is what I remember most from my learning experience in kindergarten. I remember catching onto reading pretty quickly and reading the little stapled together paper books we’d read at school and take home to practice. That’s all I really remember from this point in my education, but of course reading is huge to the rest of this education system so, it was very paramount.
[8:16] Now we’re on to first grade (‘01-‘02). What I remember most from this grade was that everyone’s teeth were falling out except mine. I also remember the spelling tests we’d have. I remember studying a lot with my mom on the way to school for these. She’d call out the word from the front of the car and I’d spell them all from the back of the car. I was always really confident going into these spelling tests because I did study so much. Though I do distinctly remember that I did have a very sophisticated cheating method for those times when a certain word was tripping me up. I remember that I’d write the word on the inside of my desk with chalk before the test and sneak a peak when that word was called to spell next. I also remember getting a giant candy bar for getting 100% on all my spelling tests this year. Of course, I’m not proud of this (and I was only 7 or 8 years old), but it’s a tid bit that I still remember and does speak to how our education system works. I was rewarded for my marks on a test, not for how well I actually knew the material. I didn’t realize this then, and I wouldn’t realize it until a long while later, but this was the beginning of how the rest of my education and learning would be measured.
[9:37] So, now I’m in second grade (this is ‘02-‘03). I honestly don’t remember much about this year in my life educationally. My teacher really wasn’t that memorable to me and the material wasn’t super exciting for me either. The most I remember was all of us sitting as a class on the floor listening to the teacher read. If I’m remembering correctly though, I began getting migraines during school this year. I’d be sent to the nurses office relatively often for migraines. This continued throughout elementary school, and looking back now I’m sure was because of my boredom with being cooped up there all day. This was obviously an issue for my mom because I’d call her a few days a week from the nurses office and sometimes she’d have to leave work to take me home. This was great news for me, but obviously I couldn’t see the affects or tolls it was taking on my mom. All I knew was that I got to spend time outside of school and with my mom, which made me ecstatic. Overall, though, the education this year was standard (probably) and the authoritative structure was still ever-present.
[10:44] And next we’ve got third grade (2003-2004). My teacher for third grade was probably the teacher that had the biggest impact on me in elementary school. I remember learning multiplication during this year, and starting standardized testing, which I enjoyed because we got snacks and a break from our normal class work. Standardized testing is of course an issue because of the ways that it allows kids to fall through the cracks. I did well on these for the most part, but not because I actually grasped the material. I was testing slightly above my grade level so the tests weren’t ever challenging me. The tests in general this year weren’t challenging me, because of how I was approaching the material. This is in large part due to what I remember learning about reading this year. I remember distinctly that we’d get together in these little reading groups with our teacher while other kids did their other school work, maybe 4 to 5 students in each group. There was one kid in my group who read really fast and either they were rewarded for it or I felt that they were a better reader than me because of this, but it taught me that I had to read for speed, instead of comprehension. This was the start of something disastrous for anyone trying to learn in this system. I began trying to get done reading before this other kid and I didn’t care if I understood what I read or not. As long as I got done quickly and could have a little break while everyone else was still working, that’s all I cared about. I didn’t want to have to be doing work that I didn’t care about doing so any break from it was great! This was the tiny seed that began this type of mindset that I took on.
[12:32] I took it on into fourth grade (‘04-‘05), but not in a way that was any more disastrous to my learning than the reading for speed. Actually, I believe this year I tested into gifted classes. I started going to gifted reading and mathematics classes during the school day. These were small groups of students who were reading at or doing math at levels higher than their peers so they were grouped together and taken to a separate class with a separate teacher for these lessons. I miraculously tested into them and tried to keep up with them for that year, but not without struggle. I still didn’t want to be doing work that I didn’t care about and math was definitely one of those things. I struggled with that class and I don’t believe I continued going to it for the entire year. My lack of reading comprehension skills was beginning to show too, but somehow I managed to keep up with the group and continue this one throughout the year. What I remember most from this year and my classroom though was the friends I made. I remember making fake Pokémon cards with one kid, learning to draw from a few others, and selling used erasers and pencils to my fellow fourth graders. I was very business-savvy this year, selling my peers used erasers and pencils that I no longer wanted for 10 cents on the playground, or sometimes directly from my stash in my desk when the teacher wasn’t looking. Those were definitely used to distract me from the droning learning process that we were all required to go through for 6 hours every day.
[14:06] Then I started fifth grade (‘05-‘06 for me). This year was pretty standard. I went through the year pretty breezily. This is the year that I joined band though! So this was the year of the start of my friendship with Jasmine. I loved being pulled out of class to go learn to play an instrument a few times a week. I learned so much about working together and working towards something that I valued and enjoyed during these lessons. I also remember that this was the year we had to go through the D.A.R.E. program. A police officer would come into our classroom every so often and talk to us about drugs and tell us to not do them. That was a nice distraction from the normal class material, but seems icky looking back on it now. This is obviously a way to get children to begin to trust law enforcement with having little to no prior knowledge of the harm they inflict on low-income individuals and families and BIPOC. Gross. This has a war-on-drugs background and most of us know how bullshit that is. And it didn’t stop there.
[15:13] Into sixth grade we go (2006-2007). This was my first year in middle school. I was in a different school completely and had my own schedule for the first time. My middle school worked on teams, so there were 3 teams per grade and basically 4 teachers per team. All the students in each team had classes together and all had the same teachers. This also meant that if your best friend was on a different team than you, you pretty much never saw them during the day. Classes were difficult for me this year, but I always loved band. That was a great way to start the day, even if it did mean I had to wake up at 5:00. I kept up the habit of getting through things as quickly as possible to get some break from school work, and I bet that had something to do with how much I struggled to grasp the material this year, and as we’ll see in years going forward. And, as I mentioned, we did still have police in our classrooms this year too with the G.R.E.A.T. program. This was a gang resistance program taught by police officers who came into our classrooms and took over for the period every so often. Different program name and material, but still the same underlying agenda. Overall what I remember from this year was that everything was new and exciting, but I also struggled a lot.
[16:34] Next up we’ve got seventh grade (2007-2008). This grade was very similar to the previous year for me. Not much stands out to me now education- /learning-wise. I pretty much scrapped through, following that just-get-by-with-your-high-enough-marks structure I had figured out earlier. I also entered my first romantic relationship during this year (OooOoOo). We went on little dates every so often and lived close enough to each other that we’d spend days hanging out at each other’s houses. They were a great person and friend to me. They’re family was always so welcoming and I enjoyed being around them. I look back on those memories fondly.
[17:15] We continued to date through eighth grade as well (‘08-‘09). This year was a little more exciting than previous years. We were the oldest class in the school now and we were celebrated for it. We got to choose some of our classes and got a special eighth grade dance and trip at the end of the year. I remember really struggling with my math classes and constantly trying to keep up with the rest of the class. My other classes, though, came relatively easy for me this year, and I had fun with my peers during the day. This year, though, marked the last year Jasmine and I would be in school together because she was moving to Canada after the school year. This was really hard for me, and her and I weren’t on the same team either so we didn’t spend much time together during school. I tried making a friend that I saw had the same schedule as me. We hit it off and stayed friends through high school pretty much, but honestly that friendship was never going to be like the one I felt I was losing with Jasmine moving away. My view on this situation was very dramatic looking back now, but I also felt completely helpless in the situation. As a child, I had no control over whether my best friend and her family moved to another country. This affected me a lot, and the way I saw it was that I needed to move on and find someone else to be my best friend. It was very difficult and we’ll see how it affected me in high school…
[18:41] …in the next episode. This time in my life had a big impact. I didn’t realize it so much then, but looking back I can see that that’s where a lot of my mental illness started. I’m gonna go deep into my social and emotional life in that one because that has a huge impact on learning. So please tune in in two weeks for the continuation of my experience with the US education system and learning.
[19:09] {Singing} *Recommendaaaationsssss*
Only got one recommendation for ya today, and that’s Mazaska Talks. Learn about how and where to divest your money to stop supporting environment-destroying pipelines and other projects, and how and where to reinvest in your local community. Only good things can come from this. I’ll link the Mazaska Talks website in the episode notes.
[19:37] And just a little reminder to think back on your experience in whatever education system you grew up in. How has that experience affected how you learn today?
[19:47] If you enjoyed this episode, help support the podcast! All this content is free and I’d love to make it my job one day, so if you’re financially able join our patreon or send a one-time or recurring donation through paypal! You can also share an episode with family or friends, and give UK a kind rating and review!
Check out UnderstandingKindness.com for all episodes, transcripts, and blog posts. And why not take a listen to my other podcast, Better When Awkward, co-hosted by my childhood best friend Jasmine!
Get in touch with me by emailing UnderstandingKindness@protonmail.com, or through social media. You can find all links in the episode notes.
For now, be kind, be compassionate, be understanding, and question everything. I’ll be here. Thank you for listening to this episode of Understanding Kindness. [End transcript]