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Manhood often feels like navigating through uncharted territory, but you don't have to walk alone. Join us as we guide a conversation about how to live intentionally so that we can join God in reclaiming the masculine restorative presence he designed us to live out. Laugh, cry, and wonder with us as we explore the ins and outs of manhood together.
00:00
Well, we're still here. We have not left. We're, we've made it an eighth of a mile where this is in the truck with Jesse French, stuck in traffic podcast by restoration project, Chris Bruno sitting shotgun, Jesse doing a masterful job. Thank you. Driving. Thank you. One mile an hour. So technical in the mountains and your technical driving is just stunning. I appreciate it. Right. Thank you. You get an A.
00:29
Yes. Woo! Yes. Yeah. We're still here. We are still here. And we can still see the two miles ahead of us. That literally looks like it's at a standstill. It does. It does. All because people have the audacity to want to witness changing Aspen. I'm sorry that came out snarky. It did come out snarky. That was uncalled for. And I'm sorry. Here's the thing is that I would not blame them.
00:56
I don't blame them for wanting to see the beauty of the Aster. I blame them for being stupid drivers.
01:04
don't know how to drive their cars. Oh my gosh. Or find, just continue to move. All right, so I want your four rules of Chris Bruno's driving school. Ready, go. Because you have strong driving opinions. No, I don't. Yeah, you What are you talking You totally do. You totally do. That phrase that you just said, people drive their cars, I've driven with you, and there are times where you will say the phrase, drive your car. Yes. Out of frustration. It is true.
01:33
Four tenets of Chris Bruno's driving school. Okay, ready to go. Number one, if you are old enough and mature enough to get behind the wheel of a several thousand pound piece of metal and attempt to hurdle it down a road at any speed, whether it be 10 miles per hour or 75 miles per hour, then you need to own your responsibility. Okay. It is on you to make the thing move according to
02:01
the patterns and laws of the societal norms around traffic and movement. So just the number one Bruno traffic law responsibility is like, own it. Own it. Which means like, don't come to a four way stop and do the like five small lurches because you're not sure if it's your turn. What else does tenant one look like when you're in violation? If your car is not moving, it should not be on the road. Oh, must maintain perpetual movement.
02:31
must maintain perpetual movement. That's a great way to put it. When the light turns green, take your foot off the brake and start moving. When the light turns red, put your foot on the brake and stop moving. Don't continue to move in the direction that is opposite of where the lights are indicating. And then just generally continue to move at the pace that is the road is designed for.
03:01
We are on a road right now. That is designed for 65 miles an hour. 65 is the hope. We've now topped up at 15. 15! Yes. But your foot is on the brake and your sling is down. Now we're slowing down. Okay. Okay. So that'd be number one. Number two is be alert. Yeah, useful. Right. Notice what's happening and in the alertness, anticipate. Don't react, respond.
03:31
Hmm. Anticipate. Okay. Ahead of me is a light. There is the potential that that light might turn red. Yeah. Or it might stay green. But because of my overarching like meta awareness of what is happening around me, I can anticipate based on my experience with lights that this one will or won't turn red in the next few seconds while I approach.
04:01
Great. Anticipate. Okay. I like that one. Okay. What do you got number three? Parallel park. Oh wow. That's okay. We made a big jump from drive your car, anticipate to parallel park. If you don't know how to parallel park, have no responsibility of being behind a wheel. Man, that sounds like someone who's lived in a big city before. Yes. I'm going to push back a little bit. I feel like that's a little bit judgmental. Well, what about the places that parallel parking is not needed?
04:30
or not commonly facilitated, you're gonna revoke their driving privileges because someone, you know. Yes. Okay. Harsh. Here's the thing. Tell me. Tell me. It's the same idea of, this is not having to do with driving. It's the same idea of, do you know how to spend money? Continue. So if you know how to spend money by using your debit card or your credit card, you should also know how to spend money by using cash.
04:59
And if you know how to use cash, you should know how to make change without using a calculator. That is really sound logic. The thing is like, it's all part of it. No, no. You, need to make an ethic, not based on the margins, but on the whole spectrum. No, no, no, And parallel, making change out of dollars. That is like genuine practice. Parallel parking. God, unless you like live in Chicago. If you're going to get behind.
05:27
the wheel of a vehicle, you should know how to do the hardest thing that you will ever have to do. Chris. You should know how to do the hardest thing that you will ever have to do in that vehicle. Okay. You need to know how to go backwards. You need to know how to go forwards. You need to know how to park. Because you don't know the next time that you're driving if you're going to need to parallel park. Which brings me to my fourth. Please, please. Everyone in the world needs to know how to drive a stick. Amen, brother. Breach it!
05:56
Why do you say that to that one and not number three? So, okay. Because I've gotten criticized for my parallel parking abilities and so there's a little bit of some... We touched on some story there that... a little insecure. But I'm with you on learn how to drive a frickin manual transmission. Okay, drive, yeah. Everybody needs to know how to drive a manual and it's just a thing. So this is my floor. Okay. I just love animation and the energy around it, so...
06:24
I have a little bit of energy around how to and on top of that It's not just drive your car drive your car has become a metaphor for all the it has so please please apply So when you're on a plane and the plane comes to the gate Oh gosh And the pilot turns off the seatbelt sign right by the time the pilot turns a seatbelt sign off You should be ready
06:50
No way man. To No, because you're in row 26 and you're gonna wait for 14 minutes and so like don't rush the process. I'm that guy. You need to start packing your bag when they start saying we're making our descent into our final destination. gosh. You need to start putting things back and you can still have something in your hands. you need to be ready to get off the plane so drive your car. Drive your car. Right? Okay. Okay.
07:19
Give me one more example.
07:22
Oh man, trying to be selective in my response. Okay. mean, it could be anything like that. Like, just like take ownership. What the holy cow. This guy just rode by on a motorcycle side saddle. Oh, oh my gosh. Never seen that before. Never seen that before. Okay. That's why motorcyclists get a bad rap.
07:52
Sorry. Yes, that's why they get a bad rap. Goodness. And if you're a motorcyclist, please don't ride side saddle. Terrible idea. It's not a good idea. He didn't have a helmet on, but I doubt that'll help. That'll help later. Yikes. Yeah, just like do it. If you're gonna do it, do it. Like get in line and go do what you need to do at the grocery store or at Disney World or wherever you're waiting at the post office. Wherever you're waiting in line, like be in line. Right. And own it. Own it and be there.
08:21
So the other day we were talking about the word decide. Oh yeah. And it was this very interesting conversation and you were talking about actually some of the root word or like whatever the fancy word is that talks about breaking words into parts. The etymology. Etymology. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Of the word decide. Take us into that. Oh man. Well I love what words mean. And so when you think about the word decide what were we talking about? It was some
08:51
trying to make a decision. Yeah, like some hard sort of where you're in a dilemma. You're like, man, I can, I can see both sides to see both sides. Yep. The, the root of decide that word side or that portion of a word side actually means death. It actually is related to something dying. And so think about the other words that have side in them. Yep. Genocide, homo side.
09:18
suicide, like something is dying. Yes. And so when we talk about decide, it is not the one that you were choosing for, it is the one that you're choosing against. That you were saying no to the one and putting death to the option that otherwise would have had life. Yes. It struck me so much because it is based in this non-negotiable reality that like a choice requires death, right? It requires no.
09:48
And so when you're talking about drive your car, like, hey, be willing to own things and accept the consequences and make a decision. Make a decision. Do what needs to happen. Yes. 100%. Hmm. So.
10:05
Part of the reason it struck me is because it's so easy for me to want to look on both sides of the equation, right? I want the decision that there is no death, the choice that allows no difficulty, no disappointment of other people. That's the scenario that I want. when we were choosing the route for how to come home? Yeah. Like everything in me was like, frick, I don't want to choose. Because what if I choose the wrong one?
10:34
Newsflash, I think I chose the wrong one. By multiple hours. Newsflash, I think you probably did. And... And... In every death there is the opportunity for other life. That is actually the gospel. So, you and I would have not had these extra multiple hours. Yes, this is true. Multiple, multiple, multiple, multiple hours. Okay. Will you still be saying this?
11:03
when we get home at like nine o'clock at night. You might have a different, different tune. Okay. You know, um, so there's that there's the conversations that we have had, not recorded conversations that we've had. There's these couple recorded conversations that we've had, but there's also the, like, what are the opportunities that we don't even know about that, that life is happening around us of, for our families, for, you know, our
11:32
hearts, our preparation for tomorrow, anything like that. So, yes. I think it also, what you're saying right now, it also sort of confronts and asks like, what is the right decision? And so, yes, we want to be discerning people that are trying to make choices that have, that are wise and prudent, right? But I feel like in some of what you're saying there too, right, is how we go about making that decision could be as important as some of the outcome. Oh yeah. Right? Oh yeah.
12:01
For sure, I think by and large, the how of things is just as, if not more important than the what.
12:11
And you're saying in a lot of dynamics, like in life. And I feel like your question is what is the right decision? I don't know that there are right decisions in those kinds of things, like especially like, is this the right route to go home or whatever? The ultimate outcome is the right decision is the decision that was made. is how we embody the current experience. And I think so much we experience these kinds of things as an interruption.
12:41
to our world and to our life. When in fact, sometimes the most amazing things happen in the moments of interruption. That interruption is an opportunity for the Spirit of God to show up. It's an opportunity for us to slow down and reevaluate. It's an opportunity for us to wonder at something that we wouldn't have wondered about. It's an opportunity for us to, yeah, interruptions are all throughout the scriptures. It's crazy how it kind of annoys me, frankly.
13:11
How willing Jesus is to be interrupted. Yeah. Right? Absolutely. I'm like, dude, and you're not being efficient. Well, yeah, certainly not being efficient. But go back and look at the how many of the stories of the Gospels are the results of some kind of interruption. Yeah. Some kind of person calling out from the side of the street as they're walking by or, you know, some kind of storm that comes out in the middle of their attempt to pass the Sea of Galilee or.
13:40
It's mostly interruptions. Yeah. Yeah, none of his ministry was planned in that sense now in the sovereignty of God Of course it was but in the humanity of the walk on earth. It was all about an eruption. Hmm And it's it's unnerving it is it because it feels so different than Common approach. Yes. Hmm Chris is there someone in your life who had a noticeable willingness to be interrupted and like informed
14:10
That willingness and humility like, bled into their life in good and generous ways. I honestly cannot say that I do. Hmm. I can't think of someone who just comes to mind just like that. honestly can't. Can you?
14:27
So my grandmother, her presence was one of enjoyment, of invitation towards people. So there was a willingness when I was growing up as a grandchild to just go and tell her all the stories. Right? She was that kind of grandma. She was that kind of grandma. And who I think sincerely enjoyed and was like, yes, I want to hear 20 minutes on the latest eight-year-old thing, right? I don't know. That's not like
14:56
Maybe there's some elements of being willing to be interrupted. That's, you know, some of that is just my experience of her, her enjoyment, right? I will say like, there's something in me has shifted with, with my kids, where all of my kids are now out of the house. And when they call, I am far more willing to allow, not that I wasn't willing before, but my posture towards it is far different. When they call, I am far more willing to...
15:26
spend the time and give the time and enjoy like, just get to be here. These are some really precious and rare opportunities for me to hear from them. And so that interruption, even just the last six months would not have been as welcome as it is now. That's a, that's a really good maybe I feel a little bit like your grandma in that sense. Cause she's, you know, I want to hear from you. This is wonderful for me to hear from you.
15:55
That's a really good example. But otherwise, I mean, I think the opposite of interruption is efficiency. And I think we're so highly committed to our efficiency that we base our decisions on what is right and what is wrong on an efficiency meter. Yep. Of was it the most efficient? Totally. Because that was the grid for our route conversation, right? Yeah. What route gets us home quickest?
16:20
Which of course, I wanna be home with my wife. I love love you Jesse, and I wanna be We've spent several days together. We've days It's good. And we're gonna spend several more together this week. I wanna see her. we are here, where we are, and this is the interruption. Yeah, yeah. So, okay, now I'm really gonna try to put you in a bind. No. And you'll probably wiggle your way out of it. Okay. Does.
16:48
The first tenet of Chris Bruno's driving school of drive your car. Yes. Does that facilitate a posture of interruption elimination? That is a good way of phrasing that. Does that put us in a posture of interruption elimination? It's of a mouthful. Wow. Did you just come up with that? See, when you're stuck in traffic and it stopped, you can like come up with all sorts of big words. Come up with big words. That's fantastic. I think it has the potential. Yes.
17:17
it has the potential for sure. I think there's also less about the efficiency of it and more about the responsibility of it. is what gets me going. Be an adult. Take responsibility for your life. Do the thing that you need to do right now. Which I think is hopefully some of the maturing process that you're talking about that I think I experienced with my grandma.
17:44
grandmother was like, hey, actually you being an adult is acknowledging, hey, I need to give room for this. My kid is calling me right now. Yeah. The responsibility to take is, I'll take this interruption. Yeah. Right. Yes. Yes. That's well said. It's not about the efficiency. It's about the responsibility. The kind of interruptions that I don't like are when the semi in front of us cuts into our lane. Hold on. Hold on. No, man. How is he supposed to the lane is ending.
18:13
How are you supposed to merge? You merge like a zip. Our New Zealand friends down in New Zealand. This is true. You merge like a zip. You merge like a zip. Drive all the way to the end. Yes. Of both possible lanes and then zip. Actually true. If that is what is happening right now. But I also have opinions about semis being on the road in the middle of the day. Dude, that semi is a like livestock calling semi. It is. And so shout out to the people in the agricultural industry. I hear you saying.
18:40
You hate agriculture and you want to be a vegetarian. Wow. That was a significant leap. It was a little bit. It was a little bit. You didn't quite say those words, almost almost almost. Surely. Just kidding. Oh my gosh. OK, well, that's it for this podcast. shut it down there. Bye.