When Scissors Meet Sensory Needs: Transforming the Haircut Experience

Show Notes

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Every parent knows the challenge of a child's first haircut—the tears, the squirms, the fear. Now imagine that experience amplified by sensory sensitivities or communication barriers. For countless families of children with disabilities, something as routine as a haircut can become an overwhelming ordeal.

Meet Brianna Wells, a hairstylist who transformed her career path from aspiring kindergarten teacher to specialized children's stylist. Working at Cookie Cutters salon in Yulee, Florida, Brianna has created a safe space where children with sensory sensitivities, autism, and various disabilities can receive haircuts in a supportive environment. With approximately 40% of her clientele having special needs, she's developed innovative approaches through careful observation and communication.

The magic in Brianna's technique lies not in specialized training but in her willingness to listen and adapt. "I focus on acknowledging their comfort in whatever way they express it and leading with that," she explains. Whether using sensory toys for distraction, learning from ABA specialists who accompany clients, or tracking detailed notes about each child's preferences, Brianna tailors each haircut experience to the individual. Her success stories include children who once required 45-minute appointments filled with tears now sitting calmly for 15-minute cuts.

Beyond techniques, Brianna emphasizes the importance of persistence. "Don't give up. Be persistent. The more consistent you are with these experiences, the better results you'll see," she advises parents. This philosophy mirrors what other specialists in the disability field consistently recommend—doing the challenging work now creates independence and confidence later.

Whether you're a parent of a child with sensory sensitivities or a professional working with special needs populations, this episode offers valuable insights into creating inclusive experiences. Subscribe now to hear more conversations with experts who are reimagining how we serve children with disabilities in everyday settings.

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Join us as we dive into the world of special education with two educators who have walked the same path as many of you. In addition to teaching in self-contained and collaborative settings, our hosts bring a unique perspective to the challenges and triumphs of raising a special needs child. From classroom strategies to heartfelt family moments, they offer practical advice, empathy, and a community of support. Discover how their personal experiences can shed light on your journey and gain valuable insights into navigating the complexities of special education both in and out of the classroom. Welcome to the tribe!

Speaker 1: so we are crawling
out of the starting blocks of

for this episode.

At the time of the recording,
we have seven days of school

left.

Seven yes seven.

It's been a long, hard,
treacherous road and I'm ready

for that summer break.

You know how we get off for two
months, right, all teachers,

they get off for two months.

It's like I think some people
don't understand that we don't

get paid for those two months,
so that doesn't even make a

whole lot of sense.

But, I digress.

It doesn't even make a whole
lot of sense, but I digress.

So we've had some fantastic
guests with us over our long

20-something episodes of
experience and it's been really

cool because we've had teachers
that Xander's worked with, we've

had friends of ours that are
teachers, and so there's all

these really cool connections
and different people we get to

talk to.

But for this episode we get to
talk to a young lady that we

have known for a long time.

Speaker 2: Yes.

Speaker 1: As a matter of fact,
even longer.

Yeah, like, I think, middle
schools.

I think you're right, does it
sound right?

You're in?

Yeah, I was 12, almost 20 years
, yeah, and this, this poor girl

, she's had to deal with not
only me in her life all that

time, her dad in her life all
that time, but her dad and I

becoming fantastically good
friends as well, and so I'm

excited to talk to her and to
see what she has to say, because

she is well, she overcame that
and is doing some great things.

So I'm going to go ahead and
let Laura introduce our guest

for this episode.

Speaker 2: All right.

So, as you stated, we have
known her for many, many years

and seen, I think, many
different phases of her life and

, as far as being involved with
children, she was one of

Xander's babysitters during some
points of his life and at one

point she wanted to be a
kindergarten teacher.

But she's also extremely
creative, artistic and talented

and she found a way to mesh her
want to serve children and her

artistic abilities by going to
cosmetology school and she's

found her niche in niche, niche
whatever.

Speaker 1: Well, down here we
just call it nichey.

Speaker 2: Okay, we in the South
the Niche and she and she cuts

children's hair and she has
really created a name for

herself because she welcomes and
encourages the parents of

children with disabilities to
come see her, because she does a

fantastic job in in working
with those children.

And this is Brianna Wells I
keep trying to call you Kilner.

Speaker 3: It's okay.

Legally it's Kilner, but I'll
take the Wells, okay, okay.

Speaker 2: So, like Jared said,
we've known her for a long, long

time and we get so excited that
we get to refer and recommend

her for some of our students.

And she's done research and
reading and experience and

working with students with
special needs, especially the

ones that sensory sensitivities
and um, she has found a way to

to put it all together and still
get these young as haircut and

that's huge Cause.

Speaker 1: That was one of those
things.

That was Xander.

It just took us forever to find
Like.

I used to just shave the kid's
head and it sounds horrible, but

that's all I could do.

I'd take some clippers too,
because he hated the sound of

the shears cutting the hair, and
that really bugged him.

But what I do want to say, too,
is not only does she do this,

she does it well, because
there's a lot of people out

there that have jobs in certain
fields that they really

shouldn't right.

That's true, and I mean, we
know teachers, we know

politicians I think all
politicians are horrible, but

anyway, I digress.

But she's good at it as well.

So, yes, go ahead.

We're going to start with the
questions.

Speaker 2: Well, I think I just
want to start and lay the

foundation.

So how did this happen, breon?

How did you go from possible
kindergarten teacher to

cosmetology school, to where you
are now?

Speaker 3: Well, some of my life
choices didn't align with the

direction I was going at the
time, admittedly.

So I kind of had a hard year
once I stopped going to college

and I just worked a lot.

Um and through that I was also
doing my friend's hair, like in

my bathroom.

So I kind of realized I like to
do it.

And I started dating my husband
now and he was like so why

don't you do it?

And I was like, oh, I wasn't
expecting that challenge.

But you're right, why don't I
do it?

So I decided to move in with
him, move to Jacksonville and

take it on.

And you know, I really didn't
think I was that good at it at

first, to be completely honest
with you.

So I ended up fast forward, I
graduate, get into my dream

salon, and it was really hard.

I was met with a lot of
personal conflicts and so I

walked away from it for a while
and I worked at Starbucks and

well, I had Harper, and then I
went back to Starbucks because

that's what I did when I was in
cosmetology school and that's

just what I did for a while.

And then I ended up back in
another hair salon and didn't

like it.

I didn't like the location.

So I quit and went back to
Starbucks and had Landon.

So meanwhile all this, while
I'm pregnant with Landon they

open up cookie cutters in Yulee
and I was like, interesting,

I've never heard of a children's
salon.

I might be able to do that, but
I want them to be open for a

year before I consider that.

So I waited and I was pregnant,
so I kind of had to wait a

little bit and continued my time
at Starbucks until I was done

and about four months after I
had him, I saw they were hiring

on Indeed.

So I just kind of went after it
and I went in and well, covid

happened.

I got hired, covid happened.

But my first day in there I was
like what am I doing here?

What did I walk into?

Because it was just insane.

I was like I don't know if I
could do this.

This is not what I thought.

I'm sitting here thinking it's
going to be all cutesy.

You know, I'm going to get to
kind of tinker with some cute

hairstyles and boost kids'
confidence, and yes, I get to do

that.

But I didn't take into
consideration the other side of

the fence.

So you know, there being
children with special needs or

just babies in general, like
this, is all new to them.

So the first year was really
hard and I wanted to quit a lot.

I had a really hard time, but
then I had a shift at one point

and I was like maybe, if I just
pay attention a little different

, this, this could work.

And so now I've been there for
five years.

Speaker 1: Just like that.

Speaker 2: There it was.

So is there?

You know you talked about these
kids with some disabilities and

the babies, and a lot of that
comes along with those sensory

issues, and is there anything
that you found that in

particular, that works for?

We know that there are.

You know, all the students, all
children, students children,

you know, are different and have
different sensitivities, like

you know, there's you know touch
, sound and having their hair

wet or washed.

Like Xander did not like the
sound of the shears.

He could do the clippers and
for a long time he did not like

the sound of the shears and
until he was maybe about nine or

ten, like jared said, he always
had to just get bushy and he'd

shave it off.

And then it'd get bushy and
he'd shave it off.

So what did, what did you do to
help overcome that with these

kids?

Speaker 3: well, the first thing
I did when I realized something

needed to change in my methods
Um, cause I would just get

overwhelmed prior to I just
started asking questions, um,

and being a lot more vocal with
the child.

Because if you just come up to
a child any child really, but

especially one with sensory
issues if you just walk up with

them with this loud device,
they're going to freak out.

You know, it goes hand in hand
with children that have had a

lot of hospital visits they also
or a lot of ear infections.

They also tend to have some
sensitivity because of those

experiences.

But really I just I started with
a lot of questions and then I

got my first experience with an
ABA specialist where I could

actually pick her brain and ask
her what am I supposed to do?

Like I know there's something
that I could be doing a little

better or I would just simply
watch and observe, like how this

specialist was communicating
with the child, what things

worked, whether it be we're
going to count, and in that

counting time I would have to be
really fast and get through

something.

And once I got comfortable
enough to start to exhibit that

in my own way, then I started to
see a lot of more improvements,

but yeah, basically just making
sure that they're aware it's

safe, you know.

If they say I'm scared, okay,
what are you scared of?

Let me help reassure you that
this?

isn't something to be scared of.

Let me help reassure you that
this isn't something to be

scared of.

It's okay that you're scared,
et cetera.

You know just a lot of
communication.

And for children that are
nonverbal, I focus a lot on how

the parents interact with them.

Sometimes that's not how, it's
not effective, so I do have to

kind of step in, but for the
most part I just kind of watch

and observe.

If they cower to me, going
closer to the touch, well then,

ok, I know that it's the
vibration, maybe we should go

with shears.

Or if they're afraid of getting
cut and they fixate on being

cut, ok, well then we should do
a buzz cut, just kind of

acknowledging their comforts in
whatever way they express it and

leading with that.

Speaker 1: And we have found
that that type of approach

really is more successful
whenever working with these

children, because so we can say
that all kids are different and

there's some some truth to that,
but at the same time there's a

lot of similarities when you
start looking at the autism

spectrum.

But the best way to serve any
of these kids and I guess,

pretty much humanity in general,
is to listen, is to pay

attention, to see the things
that move them, what are the

things that excite them, what
are the things that, like you

said, that scare them.

And then you look at how can I
replace that, how can I replace

that fear, how can I replace
that discomfort and then, at the

same time, give them a good
haircut?

And so we see that a lot in,
like I said, in the special

education field, all the way
around, and that's definitely

one of those suggestions that
you throw out.

There is, hey, step one, watch
and listen.

Speaker 2: Watch and listen.

So do you have a lot of repeat
clients come in?

Speaker 3: Yes, I would say and
you know this is a very wide

variety of sensory or children
on the spectrum, but I'd say

about 40% of my clientele have
some form of sensory um hardship

, or are nonverbal um or just
disabled, like cannot walk on

their own or in a wheelchair,
cannot communicate or really

kind of break down what's being
said.

So yeah, there's a wide variety
of children with special needs

that I serve.

Speaker 2: I know we talked a
bit about you know you being

around Zander for a good portion
of his life and that you did

start school, but other than
that, have you had any specific

trainings or experiences working
with children with different

disabilities?

Speaker 3: No, I just kind of
learned as I went and I have a

pretty decent memory with these
things when it comes to details

about people, and so I always
know what worked, what didn't

work, and if it's something that
I'm not going to remember, I do

keep track of it.

We have the ability to, like,
put notes in our system.

So you know, if I have a child
that fluctuates a lot like one

day I can do a haircut in 15
minutes, it was great.

And the next time they come in
well, that one took 30 and they

were angry, they were crying,
like.

I keep track of all of that so
that I know what their progress

looks like, cause sometimes it
just isn't there.

Speaker 2: So it's important for
me to know why you know that's,

that's something that they,
they teach us.

So don't just try to figure out
.

You're not just trying to
figure out how to calm them down

.

You're trying to figure out why
they're upset.

Yes, and that's huge, Because
if you can figure that out, then

you can use those replacement
behaviors and teach them how to

adjust and how to be okay with
what you're getting ready to do.

Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, we can
keep going.

Speaker 3: Go ahead.

Speaker 1: But yeah, no, I don't
have any certifications, I

don't have any trainings.

Speaker 3: I don't have anything
like that.

People ask me though, to go to
certain training I'm like no.

Speaker 2: No, I know that you
are not afraid to ask questions

and I, you know, you, you know
we've had conversations and you,

you know, messaged us a few
times about okay, so what about

this and what do you think about
that.

And I know you've read up on it
and and done your research on

your own and I think that's just
fantastic and it's pretty cool

to be able to say, hey, I know
somebody when these parents are

like, oh, his hair's getting
long.

We have a mini Xander in our
class.

He has the hair like Xander.

He runs around the room like
Xander did.

And she's like, oh yeah, and he
has the curls.

And she's like, oh yeah, and he
has the curls.

And she's like my husband's
getting ready to cut his hair

and he's going to cut all his
curls off and he's just going to

have to use the clippers.

And I was like, hey, wait, I
know someone.

Speaker 1: We got a person.

Speaker 2: And they came to you.

She was so excited that she got
to take our little man down

there to see you, and she was so
nervous at first too, and she

told me and but yeah, it's, it's
really, it's really pretty neat

to do that and be able to send
these people down and know that

there is there is an option.

And yeah, um, because the more
and more we can include our, our

children with disabilities into
everyday life and more they can

experience, then I feel that
they know the more benefits that

they they will have almost kind
of like a desensitize

desensitizing them to how things
work so that it isn't as

impactful, right, you know, like
in a negative way it can be

more of a positive impact.

Speaker 3: Something else that
I've realized is having like

stem toys or like some type of
sensory toy helps a lot too Like

.

In that case, his favorite thing
was this little puzzle that

just you had these little balls
that had to be pushed up and it

had a rotation to it and that's
how I got through that haircut.

You know, it's just kind of
figuring out like, okay, this is

just new, well, how can I kind
of bring an element that isn't

into this experience right now?

So, yeah, that's another,
another tool that has been

important to have.

Speaker 1: Well, you know,
haircuts aren't typically

something that people think of
when they think of, you know,

having a child that is on the
spectrum or has whatever

disability or whatever.

Because you always focus on
what may be considered and let

me qualify this after I say it
something that might be

considered more important, right
?

Because you think about, oh,
the feeding possible and you

want them to be able to
experience life as close to

normal as possible.

And so when you start talking
about things like that, it does

go way past the typical big
issues.

But the going to a store right,
xander going to a store was

hard, taking him to do something
like that.

But getting a haircut going to
the store was hard, taking him

to do something like that.

But getting a haircut going to
the dentist, right.

All of these other things that
we don't think about very often.

And the truth is that the people
that work with students and

individuals with disabilities,
they have to have a desire to

serve that group.

If they don't, then there is way
more frustration, and I'm sure

there's been plenty of people
that took the same route you did

and bailed Because they
probably entered wanting to just

do hair.

But it takes a special person
to really, like you were saying,

pay attention and to love them
and want them to have an

experience that is positive and
really reinforces their desire

to try new things.

I know with Xander, one of the
things we did when he started

eating was we would ask him to
try stuff, and if he tried it

and didn't like it, it's like
cool, you don't have to eat it

because you tried it.

And so what they did is allowed
him to gain a sense of

confidence when trying things,
knowing that, even if it's

disgusting, I don't have to do
it again, and so it sounds like

the same process that you're
talking about when it comes to

getting a haircut.

I mean, this is something
they're going to be doing for

the rest of their lives.

Yeah, they're going to be
getting haircuts.

That's right, and so you are
setting them up with coping

mechanisms that will allow them
to again function better, in a

general sense, in the world
around them, and I think that's

fantastic.

Speaker 3: Thanks.

Yeah, it's been a journey, and
I mean I've got all different

ages too, so I've seen one.

I have one young man that I've
not been doing his hair directly

for the five years, but I have
been for the last year and a

half and it's just so cool to
see that breakthrough moment.

You know, because, on the
spectrum or not, we all have a

brain.

We all have like access points
and ways to open it up and to

see that in children that have,
you know, a harder time

deciphering what that is is,
it's incredible.

I really have a lot of joy.

And when I can then get to a
point where I can communicate

and get a yes or a no out of the
child, that's even better.

Like you don't have to say much
, if I can.

You know that your yes is a yes
and you know your no is a no.

That's enough for me.

We can do this Absolutely Well
and you're building those

relationships and you know your
no is a no.

Speaker 2: That's enough for me.

We can do this absolutely well
and you're building those

relationships and you're
building trust with them and

that's the biggest part yes, yep
and so they know that, like, so

they're not gonna, you're not
gonna hurt them, and these

sounds aren't gonna hurt and, um
, even though this thing looks

very sharp and pointy, you know,
so there's gonna be in your ear

.

Speaker 1: Yep, what is?

What is the age group that you
guys work with?

Speaker 3: We take as young as
six months old.

If the parents think the child
needs a haircut to adults, we

don't really have a restriction.

Speaker 1: Oh, very cool.

See, now I know I would not
have been that six month old kid

because my head looked like a
cue ball.

Actually, it looked more like a
bowling ball on a toothpick

because my head is gigantic.

It really is.

It's a very large head and that
has absolutely nothing to do

with what we're talking about.

I do know this, brian.

I know that.

I know your parents are super
proud of you and it's funny

because we have these
conversations and I can hear

them both when you're talking,
and it's really exciting because

they are great people.

We love them to death.

They're close friends of ours
and this has nothing to do with

cutting hair, but I did their
wedding, that's right.

That's right.

I was around from the time that
she was in middle school.

So she's all grown up and got
married.

And have young'uns.

Speaker 2: And babies Cute
babies too.

Speaker 1: Do you have any other
questions for Mrs Curtis?

Because I'm going to hit her
with the big one, the big one,

the big one.

Speaker 2: They're gonna big one
, big one.

I mean she's she.

I think she was pretty um
informative yes, yes, I.

I don't know if I have any
other questions I did.

I do want to actually go back
when you're talking about the

ABA therapist.

Was that an incident where they
came in with a client, or were

they a parent?

Speaker 3: Yes, with a client
I've had two.

The first one, the child, had
her for, I think, about three or

four haircuts.

It was a military situation Dad
was deployed, mom was pregnant,

so she came in to kind of help
and the first haircut took 45

minutes and we are now down to
about 15 and there's no

specialist.

Um, we're having some
communication changes that we're

working through, but I am doing
my best to understand.

And then I have another one who
I think he's four right now and

his specialist comes every time
.

They've been seeing me for
about a year and she's come

every time for that whole time.

This last one she tried to
leave the building but they have

pictures of her on the phone to
kind of associate that she's

still there.

But I think they're in the
process of transitioning her out

of that experience.

Speaker 2: Right Giving him some
independence.

Speaker 3: Yeah, I've been able
to talk with her a lot, though,

you know, pick her brain, ask
why she got into doing this, or

I have mirrored a lot of her
communication tactics.

Maybe not they don't always
work, but they're always worth a

shot to try if I don't know
what to do.

Um, so she's the one that
taught me that the short and

direct responses are always
accepted better.

You know, it's like I feel like
that's just child development

in general, but especially like
in this situation, like I have

to be very three word, answer,
right Short, and it's it's

helped a lot.

So I feel literal and yes, I
feel blessed to have been able

to learn from these ladies,
cause you know, again I'm just

kind of out here doing my best,
right Figuring it out as I go.

Speaker 2: So we didn't even
know that that was an option

until we spoke with Rebecca and
David.

We had are they RBTs?

No, they're more than that
BCBAs.

Speaker 1: I don't know all the
letters.

Speaker 2: I'm getting it messed
up, but they come into the

schools and work, and they also
work at a private facility too,

and I think that was one of the
things that he talked about,

that going out in the community
and we were like, what do you

mean you go out in the community
?

And he said, well, yeah, I've
gone here, I've gone down, even

gone to a haircut, and huh, okay
, so that's.

I think that's great that they
provide that.

Speaker 3: It's really awesome.

Speaker 1: All right, here comes
the big question you ready?

Okay, what is your dad's
deepest, darkest?

No, I'm just kidding.

No, let's not go with that.

Speaker 2: We don't want to go
there.

Speaker 3: I actually don't know
, so that would have been fine.

Speaker 1: Ooh good.

No, my real question is this,
though let's play a fun little

game.

This is the last time that you
will get to make a statement

concerning what you do and the
not only what you do from a

professional standpoint, but
what you do from a relational

standpoint and nobody will ever
hear your voice again on this

conversation.

This is your last chance.

What would you say?

Speaker 3: this conversation.

This is your last chance what
would you say?

In regards to aiding the
experience of a haircut Sounds

good.

Okay, I'm like there's a lot of
avenues of this question here.

That is a big one, man, I don't
know.

Just don't give up, Be
persistent.

You know, I see a lot of
parents that they they won't

come in often because they're
afraid Plow through that Like

just keep trying, because the
more consistent you are with

these experiences whether it's a
haircut or just, you know,

community exposure you have to
keep doing it.

Like, and even when it's hard,
you can always walk out.

You know you don't have to stay
and create a traumatic

experience.

You can just say, okay, let's
try again next week, but keep

doing it, because that
inconsistency is just not

helpful for the overall
experience.

So I think that's really it,
because I could say all these

other things and I could give
all these other insights, but I

do think that just persistence
is the key and to remain

graceful, to have grace.

Speaker 1: Yes, ma'am.

Speaker 3: That is huge.

That is like my fuel.

I pour that in my coffee, right
.

Speaker 2: Absolutely.

She's, you know, has going
along with our conversation with

lindsey about.

You know that, yeah, these
these lives of parenting

children with disabilities are
messy, but the people that serve

your kids, they're okay with
that mess and and to keep trying

and do the hard work now.

Speaker 1: I mean, what you're
saying is kind of a common theme

amongst our conversations with
different professions, right?

Whether it is an ABA therapist
or a hairstylist or an

occupational therapist or
whatever, it is that same.

Do the hard work now.

Speaker 2: Stick with it, stick
with it, stick with it and it

will pay off and if you're, if
you are a parent looking for

somebody to serve your child and
love your child while they get

their haircut.

If you're not local, find you a
brianna.

If you are local, let me have
one and we can and we can, uh,

hook you up with where, where to
go yeah, I'm there every week

and that again.

Speaker 1: That was.

That's Cookie Cutters, right,
cookie Cutters in Yulee, in

Yulee, florida, fantastic.

But hey, we have no problem
pushing that.

Brianna, thank you so much for
hanging out with us, yeah thanks

for having me and having this
conversation and we love you.

Speaker 3: Oh, I love you guys
too.

Speaker 1: There's not a whole
lot of guests.

I think we said it to my mom,
yeah Right, so see you're in

really good company.

But no, really thank you and as
someone that has had the

opportunity to watch you grow up
, I'm super proud of you, as

Laura is too.

Thank you so much and we love
your heart and keep doing what

you're doing.

You're appreciated.

Thank you, all right, and I
think that's we're going to wrap

this episode up and we'll get
it again next week.

We'll see you later.