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Got something that gives you The Willies? Keep an eye on our show notes for our upcoming dedicated email address, or slide into our Instagram DMs to feature your story on a future episode!
The Willies, a horror-comedy podcast about the things that scare us — "big, small, ridiculous, or genuinely unsettling." Hosted by Damo and Lily with rotating guests. Funny first, creepy second.
Hello. This is Damian. I am just putting this up front of this podcast to make two apologies, really. The first one is that yes. Sorry.
Damien:It took so long to come back. The last podcast we recorded was in February. And then for Lily and I both, you know, life got in the way of stuff, both been very, very busy. Stuff was going on, but we always talked about carrying on. So we hope you enjoy the the show.
Damien:The second apology is that and it's my fault. Is that rather than turn on our microphones, I turned them off. So the audio you're gonna hear is not the kind of quality that we'd normally put out. We're not normally very, very careful about making sure that when you're listening in your car or on your headphones or whatever you might be, then it's a lovely, crispy, clear, and you can hear our wonderful sonorous voices. But this time, I've screwed up.
Damien:So the audio is not awful, but it's not what it usually is. So please don't judge us on this if you're a new listener. And, again, hope you enjoy the show. Right. Okay.
Damien:Oh. And we're off. What a surprise, Lily, because I didn't think we'd ever do this again.
Lily:Did you really think that? Well, I
Damien:thought it was a bit of me. It was like, you know, time moves on.
Lily:We were gonna be in the statistics of not getting past seven, is it?
Damien:I think it's three. Three. Okay. We beat that. Okay.
Damien:Bang to four.
Lily:So what you definitely mentioned the number seven once, though.
Damien:Yeah. Seven I don't know. Seven's like a I I don't know. Maybe it's like a lucky number thing. Someone's a seven.
Lily:Someone you were like, how many people barely gets three, and then a certain number of people then don't make it past seven?
Damien:Oh, right. I think that's most, actually. Yeah. And we're still not there.
Lily:I know.
Damien:So it's not like chickens. Fight, really.
Lily:If we're accumulating.
Damien:Yeah. And if it was the same podcast.
Lily:Speaking of which Yeah. You'll notice we have not reintroduced the podcast as a series of stupid titans, which is how the theme Some tune bloody good reason as well. Jesus.
Damien:Do you wanna say that those words in a way that isn't in beautiful, tuning? Sicarno.
Lily:I think that was high enough.
Damien:I felt like it was come off a deep alto. Tenner?
Lily:No. It wasn't. A series of stupid decisions. Yeah. Which was our baby, wasn't it?
Damien:Really? It was. It was. Difficult baby.
Lily:What do they call it? A colicky. Colicky baby.
Damien:Was a colicky baby.
Lily:Because well, it it was good at first, to be fair.
Damien:Yeah. Exciting. We, like, hit
Lily:the ground running, but then we got stitch about 200 meters round, and It it was a
Damien:was around about the hereditary time. Yeah. We realized that film.
Lily:No. It wasn't. We had not plans to do another one, but we just both of us weren't doing our homework.
Damien:No. That's yeah. We we got busy, didn't we? We got busy with lifestyle.
Lily:Busy. And, also, it was things like we'd both seen the films before, but we wanted to commit to it properly in order to do a quality podcast. Yeah. But in doing that, didn't do a podcast at all because neither of us watched it.
Damien:Because if yeah. Exactly. That was the thing. Was the the text messages, like, haven't watched the film yet, Lily, and then you were like, oh, never have I. And then it was kind of, oh, well, maybe we That's just should her.
Damien:Yeah, exactly. But I do remember Hereditary being problematic because it was the first time we were like, Oh. There aren't any stupid decisions. Not really. No.
Damien:It's a very serious film in many ways. There's nothing to laugh about in that film. But
Lily:was the first time we sort of sprinkled the idea of branching out Yeah. The podcast, and then we've kind of taken that and run with it and completely changed the name Yeah. Into kind of the focus to give us more opportunities. I think we will still talk about films because it's gonna loop into this. Okay.
Lily:And that's originally how our podcast started with talking organically about a film that we had seen.
Damien:It did.
Lily:And I think we both see horror films so regularly that that will still happen.
Damien:I think so too. I mean, we're sort lovers of horror. In fact, went to go and see Ibride Arise.
Lily:Ibride Arise. Burn. Ibride Arise That's before right. They are not related. Yeah.
Lily:I really hated it. Yeah. Like, it felt uncomfort to the point I almost wanted to get up and leave.
Damien:Okay. It
Lily:was just That's not
Damien:a good sign. It's not often one leaves a cinema unless one feels unusually No.
Lily:Not unwell. Like, that's it. Even the the gore was just like, I feel like you're trying too hard.
Damien:Yeah. Sure. Okay. Well, I'm gonna go see it tomorrow.
Lily:Yeah. Like like I said, I won't
Damien:give you any spoilers. But Like we did with Black Phone.
Lily:Black Phone two.
Damien:When I come home, I will send you using the power of voice message.
Lily:You do love a voice note, actually.
Damien:Yeah. Because I've
Lily:got Just just gonna show you a long voice note. Chuckle fingers.
Damien:Look at this. Chuckle fingers and bad eyesight means it takes me a long time to text.
Lily:You did call yourself a fat finger twat for missing It's a test so completely consistent.
Damien:Smallest tangent ever. Worse to work in a pub when I finished university. The landlord who hired me once called me a fat finger twat. No, a fat digitist twat.
Lily:Digit. Digit. It's a
Damien:lot of chubby digits.
Lily:I haven't heard the word digit used for finger since uni Right. When you would make yourself sick. Digitize What would yourself.
Damien:Fuck. I never heard that before. What? Oh. But that leads us on to creepy things.
Damien:Right? Because I find that quite
Lily:creepy. Digitizing yourself? Yeah. Because it's it's
Damien:weird on the lots of levels. Like that bit in the matrix when it does all that thing, and then it sounds like it's been digitized, but this is a whole different thing Mhmm. With fingers. Okay. Never heard that phrase.
Lily:I haven't hadn't and for a long time. Right. Because I felt that was what brought me on to that.
Damien:Right. That is a big tangent.
Lily:Look how sweaty. Yeah. Do you
Damien:wanna talk about why sweaty?
Lily:Because that's how humans cool themselves down. That's true. Dogs pants. Exactly. Dogs pants.
Lily:And I think that would be weird with the mics, really, if we were doing that. So Yeah.
Damien:Yeah. It would be. But yeah. But can we just say that this is obviously, if you're or listening to this out of context, it's because we've got this crazy heat wave. Oh.
Damien:And so it's really hard.
Lily:If you're not native to The UK.
Damien:You're not native to The UK. But, yeah, it's really, really hot, and
Lily:We were gonna do it outside the podcast. It was a bit of a treat, like a sit down weave.
Damien:A treat.
Lily:Like a sit down weave for men. I think that's a treat I've heard. I don't know if it's true. It would feel like a treat. No.
Lily:It feels like a little rest rather than nothing Maybe. To Maybe. Actively direct, you know? It's like being a passenger rather than being a driver. Like, you just
Damien:No, get it, but I do also think it's like a selfless act because men will spray Exactly. Often, and then it's like, yeah, you sit down, you're kind of doing everyone else a favor by not spraying the toilet seat with urine.
Lily:There we go. See? So a treat.
Damien:But, we treat for anyone
Lily:do outside because we didn't we weren't established before we were gonna do it quick enough. And in classic Lillian's Amo fashion, didn't plan it No. Enough or in advance. Nope.
Damien:We talked about it
Lily:a lot. On brand. Yeah. Yap and yap and yap. Yes.
Lily:But That's the execute. Yeah.
Damien:No. It's not. Yeah. Exactly. Execute.
Damien:We never finish
Lily:Theory and intention are good. Yeah. Execution. Poor. Okay, so you said on that note of fingers being creepy Mhmm.
Lily:To that led you onto something, but I
Damien:don't know where you're going. I was going straight, I guess, into the sort of purpose of this podcast, which is that if we segue from
Lily:Oh, we haven't introduced a new name. No, but we're getting there.
Damien:Feels like It's actually like episode one of a series of shipping decisions. It took us a long time to even get to the point where Because
Lily:we don't feel embarrassed to say the name. Yeah.
Damien:Right. I don't feel embarrassed about this name. I think it's the best name ever.
Lily:Nothing to be ashamed about.
Damien:Nothing to be ashamed about.
Lily:But
Damien:it's so if we're segueing from we talked about films, and then that became quite the chore, and also it's quite hard to find stupid decisions in every horror film because sometimes there aren't any.
Lily:Yeah. Well, it becomes very boring because we're repeating the same stupid decision. Oh, they've gone somewhere alone again.
Damien:They went in a cellar, and they didn't turn the lights on. Yeah. It's like, oh, okay. Yeah. So this is kind of expanding on, I suppose, the theme of horror.
Lily:Mhmm.
Damien:But it's like creepy stuff. It's stuff where Lily and I, and guests hopefully, and And guests. Guests. Guests and guests. We can talk about the little things and the bigger things that we find creepy.
Damien:Yeah. Which leads us on probably to the name of the podcast. Right? You wanna do it?
Lily:Mm-mm. This is for you. You can do it because you came out of it.
Damien:Right. So
Lily:let's see. Just announce it by that, it makes it feel worse. You do have to have it in a sentence, I think. Otherwise, it's
Damien:What do you mean?
Lily:This is it feels so Okay. Uncomfortable. Alright then. This is Okay. Us the back story of how you came up with it.
Lily:Alright. That will help because then you can go, this is how I came up with.
Damien:Okay. Back story is this. So we're changing from a series of stupid decisions because we're like, okay. We talked about it. Just quickly, the one thing that has that has that has hung around from stupid decisions is that when we're on the mats together, even today, this still happens.
Damien:Yeah. Which is a direct hangover from hereditary.
Lily:Really? Yeah.
Damien:And so there is now the signature sound of our podcast, and if I can, at some point, I will work that sound in so that you know when we're running an effort or something.
Lily:We almost played a game of bogeys with it today, actually, didn't we? Because you I did it quietly initially Yeah. Because I was trying not to be disruptive. Yeah. And then you called me out, and you were like, That was weak.
Lily:Yeah. Did a louder one. Yeah. So then I did up my game.
Damien:You did up the game, and then I pinched Lucas. I saw. Yes.
Lily:And then you kicked my leg out from under me as well. Yeah.
Damien:Did. Yeah. Anyway, so Okay. So that's the decision, and then, Lyn and I were okay fine, so let's we need to find a different name, a different kind of
Lily:like because we wanna change it. Yeah. Exactly. We did have a back and forth conversation about what we might change it to
Damien:Fro and to.
Lily:Where we were both contributing, and we landed on something to do with Omens. Omens. But then you forgot what it was. Yeah. And then a couple of weeks later, you text me and say, what do do
Damien:with this?
Lily:I just texted you. And I was like, oh my god. I love it.
Damien:Well, I want you say to a bit now because I feel like we really hyped it up.
Lily:You want me to say it? Do you know what was
Damien:gonna happen? I just thought it was really funny. Is if someone's gonna watch and listen to this, they've already seen the name of the podcast and they've titled it out.
Lily:Oh, god. That's so tragic.
Damien:That is tragic, isn't it? So this is all kind of like
Lily:How did you come up with the name, You told me you'd tell me the backstory.
Damien:Okay. I came up with the name because I was thinking about things that we find scary and funny ways of saying it, and one of the funniest phrases in my opinion is a very English phrase, which is, oh, we put the let's see. Give me the Willies. Right?
Lily:Or what? Because it's like when
Damien:your nan's like, oh, give me the Willies. You know? So it made me laugh, and then I thought there's no way that podcast title exists. Then there's a little bit of
Lily:of the names we've chosen in the past have been taken.
Damien:All the good stuff. Got like So
Lily:we never get excited anymore.
Damien:10 pages of A four with names on that we just couldn't have
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:Because they're not unique. Whereas this one, The Willies, I've said it.
Lily:You've done it well done.
Damien:I've said it. The Willies, and it's easy to remember. So when you're like, this is a great podcast lesson to you, it's called The Willies, and then that person's gonna get in their car, they're not gonna forget that. Gonna go, it's called The Willies.
Lily:And as I was saying to you earlier, I actually had to develop a fondness of the word Willies or Willy because often I would be made fun of because money rhymes with Willies. So Lily Willy was quite and then, you know, if you got upset, it made it worse.
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:And you just had to suck it up. The bullying.
Damien:Yeah. The bullying.
Lily:The bullying. No. No. Okay. Fucking hell.
Damien:That's good. And I didn't realize that because you told me that about an hour ago.
Lily:Yeah. It wasn't even that long. Feels like it's been that long.
Damien:Because it's that hot. It is an age. So what what are we doing with The Willies?
Lily:What are we doing with The Willies? So I think we were gonna start off actually with well, we're gonna have a we don't really have a particular plan in the sense it has to be a organized structure. No. We're gonna have ordinary, maybe somewhat even mundane things that might we might find creepy
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:Or really extreme things that are creepy, things that have happened to us, things that we've read about. Yeah. I think it's gonna be, which is sort of how we feel.
Damien:Uncanny things. Uncanny valley. Yeah.
Lily:Yeah. It can be recent. It can have been from years ago.
Damien:Past life.
Lily:Past life. Do you think you have one?
Damien:Yeah. What where are you? Banker.
Lily:Oh, okay.
Damien:No. I don't know.
Lily:So you got to come back as a human after being a banker.
Damien:Got to have been very I was vermin. That's why you probably know some bankers, don't we?
Lily:Vermin. Oh, man. Oh, my Yeah. Apologize to any bankers.
Damien:Yeah. Cool. To buy me with a very particular word.
Lily:I know. And, yeah, another thing I think he's looping back to uni because we used to have to do something called the sing off at uni when we joined as freshers. What? And it's where all the halls, the committees would write chants, and we'd all scream them at each other, and then you would win, like, first, second, and third. What?
Lily:And part of our chant was we were dissing a rich hall.
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:And it was, Your mom and dad are bankers. You're all fucking wankers. But Amazing. The person who did the chant forgot to say bankers and just went, your mom and dad are wankers.
Damien:Brilliant.
Lily:You're all fucking wankers. Really?
Damien:What I love now is that you pushed us into an e rating. Yeah. It was already like that. Is your podcast explicit? Yes.
Lily:I mean, there could have been worse.
Damien:We swear a lot, don't we?
Lily:And we're gonna again, because in horror films, there's lots of bruises.
Damien:There is swearing. There is.
Lily:So they're in the good ones anyway. Okay. Are you gonna tell me what your thing that bothered you this week is?
Damien:Okay. So this is the little thing, isn't it, right? Yes. So this is the little thing that I find creepy that I thought about, and I was like, yeah, yeah, that's one thing that I find creepy. It's a little thing, Lily, and it is quite simple.
Damien:It is people crouching. Right?
Lily:I actually know Do what mean? Exactly what you mean.
Damien:Boom. See, this is the kind of creepy thing we want, right? When you're like, oh, it's like the cold side of the pillow thing, isn't it? It's like Mhmm. I love the cold side of the pillow, then, like, do know what I mean?
Damien:And everyone, like, I know exactly what you mean. Yeah. But no one anyway, it's that.
Lily:People crouching. Heels off the floor.
Damien:Heels off the floor.
Lily:Because flat feet is just a deep squat, and I'm impressed with the mobility.
Damien:Yeah. Do try to do that.
Lily:Yeah. Much like that. But the crouching on the balls of your feet, where you're a bit mounded, thoracic mobility Yeah. Is I've been there. Dunkered down.
Lily:Can I
Damien:give you an example from a film that I think I know you love? Please. Sinister. That Right. Is my favorite horror Top tier top five, I think, for me, for sure.
Damien:But it is the literal ghost boy crouching in the corner of the room, and the way the camera pans across, and then you
Lily:You don't see it.
Damien:Well, you don't see it first, and then you do, and you realize that every night that poor kid has been in bed Looking. Fully aware that this little kid is just crouched next to his bed looking at him. Yeah. That's terrifying. But people crouching in general, people hide when they crouch, right?
Damien:It means that generally they're waiting to jump out on someone, like, boo them.
Lily:But in a
Damien:lot of
Lily:horror films as well, when people get possessed, they end up, like, crouching and crawling and sort of
Damien:clutch the them all legs just may not work. Yeah. It's like kind of
Lily:There's because there's something eerie about, like, that regression too. On forces out. Yeah. But also, looping back to what you just said about that boy crouching in the corner, I feel like that is also a nightmare that so many of us have. Swear, like, I've had a sleep paralysis where I've woken up and somebody's crouching next to my bed.
Lily:Right. And, like, that is
Damien:a horrible thought. I just, like, even, like, now, I don't know. It's nothing to do with the film Ring apart from the fact that Ring, the Japanese Ring, scared the Willies out of me.
Lily:There you go. I love that. Right. And one of episode where he's, like, going on about saying the name of the film, like Yeah.
Damien:In the film. And
Lily:he's like, there it is. There it is. Like, that was literally you just did that in the form his name.
Damien:It is it is that. Sadiko scared the shit out of me. She didn't do a lot of crouching, just more pointing than crouching, but it is the thought that I have even now when I've watched a horror film, when I run upstairs because I'm, like, nervous and I wanna go to bed, and I imagine Sadiko crouching, like, by the staircase, they run up, one of her hands is gonna come and grab my ankle. I still get that.
Lily:I think it's anything that is different from the norm of what we expect is what we find scary because they, this isn't really going back now, I don't know when the study or evidence was, but they looked at what humans found scary, and a lot of the time, like things like spiders and stuff, and it was things that are so drastically different from humans. Yeah. So, like, it was like things that scare a star, things that move fast. Yeah. Things that
Damien:Spies move too fast.
Lily:Yeah. It's like things that move fast, things that look really different, and there was one other thing that were, like, the top three reasons for finding something scary.
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:But that tracks, isn't it? That crouching is we'd normally be walking on two legs, like you said. So that whole idea of, like, we don't normally do that, so why are you doing it?
Damien:Yeah, exactly. Why, yeah, why is that guy crouching?
Lily:I think that's why I know it's not a spoiler, really, but because you're gonna go see the film, but in the beginning, like, they bring back obviously some
Damien:What a burn.
Lily:Of Eva Der burn. Yeah. And she just, like, walks out, and it's just it's just not scary at all, and I just think, like, yeah, you you haven't ticked the boxes. You haven't done your homework.
Damien:You need the uncanny shit, don't you? You need the
Lily:She just looks like a girl who's been to a Halloween party who's got lost, honestly.
Damien:Right. Right. Right. Yeah. Not not good enough.
Damien:Not that I've seen it yet, but I I think I know what you mean. It's, like, if you're gonna introduce horror, you have to in such a way that the the thing being presented to you is acting in a it's like
Lily:In a way that you can't fathom.
Damien:Right. And and they introduced this thing. Do remember? I think it was a film I don't if you've seen it, but it's a film called Jacob's Ladder, but they've done
Lily:this I've heard of it. Right.
Damien:Good movie. But they've done this trick so many times now where the head of someone begins to move in a weird way, and then they do the kind of fast shoot thing where the head's not gonna go like this, but the body's kind of staying in the same place.
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:But the head's like moving too far. That's, like, one of those great tricks. And then the glitch thing where someone's moving, and then they almost kind of, like, go from here to there really quick.
Lily:That's been, yes, proven to be super freaky.
Damien:Right. Not normal timing, is it?
Lily:And interestingly, Jack, who we are gonna have as a guest
Damien:So, Jack.
Lily:I know, sorry. Next time. He showed me a video, and it got rated as one of the scariest clips from a horror film, and it's this woman in, like, white with a bun, but kinda looks a bit like ballet style, but, like Yeah. Creepy. And she starts running, but her ankle, like, rolls, and her head stays where it is, but her body moves.
Lily:And the reason it's scary is because it's mirroring, like, birds of prey or, like, predators and how their heads will stay, like, fully focused when they're hunting. But, like, he doesn't like jump scares and stuff, so he was showing me this video, I was thinking, is this gonna make me jump? He's like, no, I won't do that. But, like, she's running, and she it just is super I'll try and get him to send it
Damien:to me. Stuff like that is is yeah, that's I think that's the detail in horror.
Lily:But that's what I mean. It's not the big jumps here. It's just the things that make you go, Yeah. Like, I really don't
Damien:like that. That's why zombies work. They're quite well, because zombies are there. They're just getting on with doing their thing, and then, like, they all, like, roll an ankle or something and kind of snap, and they just start they just keep going, but there's another drag in that leg.
Lily:It's the Yeah, it's the subtlety, isn't it? Because you've the zombies that are, like, screaming, and that's all very intense.
Damien:Rage zombies. But
Lily:World War Z, Yeah. When he used to, like, can't see a human who just, like, doing that teeth Oh, yeah.
Damien:I do if I have the teeth.
Lily:But it doesn't
Damien:make me Yeah, that
Lily:That kind of is creepy.
Damien:Yeah, that is proper creepy. That comes on to sound as well, doesn't it? Like, kind of things that's Oh, anyway, that's been, like, another thing. But for me, then, the little thing is
Lily:Crouching. Crouching. God, we got all that from crouching.
Damien:Right. But just to bring it into when I saw it and how I saw it and how I started thinking that sort, which is again, back to jiu jitsu, is that quite often, like, someone's sitting there crouched, listening
Lily:Ready to choke you.
Damien:Yeah. No chance. But, yeah, kind of crouched down. I looked at back of that person, I thought, yeah, people are crouching. It's quite scary in the wrong context.
Lily:Was curious to see who you were looking at.
Damien:I will give you a name later. Okay. It's a small person. Okay. Creepy, small hands.
Lily:Okay. So Phil Jackson.
Damien:It's not actually it really wasn't. I was just saying that because I know Phil would like it.
Lily:Let's hope he's listening.
Damien:Otherwise He will listen.
Lily:That joke will go to diaries.
Damien:He will listen.
Lily:Okay. Right. So yours actually ended up giving us loads to talk about. I'm thinking of mine now, and I'm thinking, oh, I'm excited
Damien:because you laughed when you thought of it.
Lily:I'm because I'm wondering if it's even more, like, it gave me the ick than It's necessarily a bit scary. But I was at my work summer party, and there was a barbecue. And, you know, they have those, like, big jumbo hot dogs laughing because our podcast is now called The Willies, and my story Is it that exact same? Phallic. Yeah.
Lily:Yeah. It's not bear with me. But, like, every time people were going to, like, eat it, the skin was, like, so thick to pierce. And, like, you know, and they're like and then forks were wooden. That's another thing.
Lily:Wooden cutlery. So this person
Damien:Not really people are annoying.
Lily:Really, like and then it would go you you'd break through the skin and you'd, like, physically hear it. And then the thought of, like, biting that of your teeth also was, like Was it the texture? Yeah. Because it was such thick skin. Yeah.
Lily:I didn't eat this sausage. I just watched many people
Damien:Was it was it a sausage situation, or was it like a Savoloy kind of skin situation? Do you know what I mean? Like, the difference, like, one thing's, like, kind of, like a, like, Savoloy is kinda like more
Lily:you know, Savoloy? Savoloy?
Damien:I don't know. It's like the red sausage that you get in a chip shop.
Lily:Yeah. Sort of like that, but it wasn't. It was Okay. Big jumbo sausage, like
Damien:But normal sausage skin?
Lily:I think so. Yeah.
Damien:Why was it so tough?
Lily:I it was thick. Maybe the wooden cutlery as well, but Right. Right. People were literally it was taking I mean, maybe they're weak.
Damien:What? And where was
Lily:I'm joking.
Damien:I I can't even pull a flipping magnet out of my box a minute ago. But, where's the creepiness in it, though? Is it was it I think was kinda like the Why is the skin on wings?
Lily:I just think it was like this it being so hard to break the skin and then that, like, piercing. It was just a bit like
Damien:Was it the popping thing
Lily:of, like, slightly penetrating skin. Yeah. And probably the clash of, like, the wooden texture of the cutberry against this. That's like a
Damien:sensory thing Yeah. That you find challenging, I think. Challenging. A challenging sensory
Lily:Yeah. It's not even that it's challenging. I just the fact that we were thinking about things that have, like, stuck in our minds.
Damien:Yeah. Yeah.
Lily:That was something where I was watching the person do it, I was like, God, that skin should not be that
Damien:I don't know. Elephantine skin light.
Lily:Yes. It's over.
Damien:Now I'm imagining you in bed, like, this, like, fussing and turning, oh, for the sun
Lily:Yours is crouching. No. You cannot make fun of my mundane thing when that is the point. I can admit. But it was okay.
Lily:Hear me out though. Okay. So everyone had eaten all their, like, food, and it'd been a bit of time, and there was still some left over because it's prepaid, so they were getting more. They were, who wants more? And they're putting big plates of, like, burgers and chicken thighs, all delicious.
Lily:Yeah. Two full plates of sausages got brought over. Did anyone go back for seconds for the sausage? No.
Damien:So it was a thing
Lily:then? It was bothersome. Perfect bothersome. It was bothersome.
Damien:Your sausages, sir, are bothersome. Don't bring me a plate of these ridiculously thick skins.
Lily:Slap it away. Just just knock it down. Leave them in the grass.
Damien:Sausages and leave a lot to be desired.
Lily:But, yes. I mean, I get it. I get it.
Damien:I get it. Little things like like that.
Lily:Well, you know, when, like, in horror films, I guess, like, when they, like, get its skin and they tear it and the skin peels. No. We thought
Damien:well, we were talking about decrunch.
Lily:I'm just saying.
Damien:That have got quite sausagesy fingers.
Lily:That's on brand, isn't it? They're getting in the way.
Damien:Skin is relatively thick. Some cotton powder under
Lily:the Yeah. That's I think maybe that's what it was. It was, like, the remnants of such tough skin that you can't break through it.
Damien:No. I get it. But we were talking about Lee Cronin's mummy
Lily:Yes.
Damien:Earlier, and
Lily:Which people we loved. Loved. And it got obliterated on Boston Smarters of '46 Yeah. Would you say?
Damien:Well, yeah. I think it's '46. She looked it up, didn't you? Because we both we both like that film. And I think that one of the best scenes, obviously, is the the thick skin
Lily:Skin actually is, like, years My worth mother. Of
Damien:Oh, so good. But that yeah.
Lily:That yeah. Just can't believe it because yeah. I looked it up because Evil Dead Burn, which, as I previously just said, I thought was terrible, got 72%. Yeah. And Jack Cooper, who will be the who called, said that he thinks someone got paid off for that score, which I would agree.
Damien:Well, maybe. I haven't heard good things about it, but I'm gonna go see it, but mostly because I get to meet five guys.
Lily:Yeah. But with The Mummy, yeah, bad reviews, but we loved it. We just love it.
Damien:I just
Lily:I feel like it ticked so many boxes that it built suspense.
Damien:It did. Not a perfect horror film, I think, by any means, but it did, like, all the right things. But and if we were going back to super decisions, there were many in that film. Oh, not
Lily:in her route or, like, leaving the kids alone. Yeah.
Damien:Or leave the demonic girl with her aging grandmother. Yeah. Great idea.
Lily:You're gonna like Evil Dead Burn because there's a bit of a there's some parallels there.
Damien:Right. Okay. So these are both, I think, quite good examples of things that we find challenging and creepy. Yes. Yours was a jumbo sausage with thick elephant At
Lily:least mine's on brand of the podcast.
Damien:No. Thought it well, on brand, if you also keep rotating around the Willy thing. That's I suppose it is. Well, yeah. Okay.
Damien:Let's all rotate around Willies then.
Lily:Okay.
Damien:So What's next, Lily?
Lily:We were gonna talk a bit about other topics that have given people the Willies. Yeah. A bit creepy.
Damien:Yes.
Lily:So the first one is the what do you call it? Not concept, because it's the thing that happens. So, like, the history of
Damien:History. Victorian post mortem photography. Yeah. That is creepy.
Lily:So you said you knew someone who has photos?
Damien:Yeah, do. I do. I have a friend.
Lily:No names mentioned. You're gonna drop out.
Damien:No. I know. Know. Because I love this is one of my favorite people in the whole world. And if you listen to this, you'll know exactly who he is.
Damien:But he's got a lovely cottage out west of it. We go around there quite often on a Saturday night, and he is a collector of many things, but one thing he has is I think there are, but it's definitely dotted around his kitchen. You know that when you look at you have the images that they're like, they're not like the magic eye ones. You've to stare at them for ages and then figure out what it is. Then it's one of those ones where you walk past it and it changes.
Damien:You used to get like badges and stuff that did it, like, you know, have like one image there, but when you move, the image adjusted slightly.
Lily:Okay. You know what I mean? Not really, but go with it.
Damien:Okay, okay. So, life, anyway. So, as you walk past these photos, it's like two little Victorian girls holding hands. But as you walk further past the pic and look back at it, they're now two almost like skeletal, the same girl. That's cool.
Damien:Really cool. But when you first do that, when you first walk past it, you're like, what? And then sort
Lily:of So is it meant to be an illusion? Yeah. Yeah.
Damien:It is. Yeah. Exactly. It's meant to be an illusion.
Lily:Okay.
Damien:But these are like, you know, dotted around, and so but but the I suppose this is an example of that very frightening Victorian Okay. Photography. Yeah. You're about to crack it.
Lily:The one that we're talking about. Yeah. So it says nineteenth century. So that would be a 100. 18 hundreds.
Lily:Yes.
Damien:Yes.
Lily:So photography didn't really exist or was a bit of a
Damien:luxury? It was it was around, but it was, like, I think fairly wealthy families only. Yeah. They would hire a photographer.
Lily:So, essentially, when a family member would die, what they would do is pose the dead person as if they were still alive to take one last picture. Sometimes, they would actually paint open eyes So on the dead that then you'd have to guess which one was actually even dead. Maybe it was a bit of a game Yeah. They played. One of them parlour games.
Lily:They didn't have phones.
Damien:Yeah. They're little bored of embroidery, and they were like, spot the dead dude.
Lily:Yeah. Rather than pin the tail on the donkey, It's a I'm bored of Pin the eyes on the
Damien:dead game, daddy. Can we do spot the dead man in the photo?
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:But, yeah, that that's horrible. And and I've seen these photos. Have you? My I
Lily:don't think I have.
Damien:My grandmother had some of these photos because, yeah, I mean, I grew up in quite a Victorian family, or the, you know, legacy of a Victorian family, and it was a thing for sure.
Lily:So what was weird is, like, they it's the fact that they had to take one last picture even though they were dead. Like, why not take the one picture whilst they're alive?
Damien:I think the death was a bit of a shocker.
Lily:Yeah. But, like, you know what mean? If they had the ability to take a picture, why does it need to be once the person's dead?
Damien:I don't know. There's a name for it. There's something mem it's either memori or I don't it's it's a bit of what what's
Lily:Memorias. I feel like you're Latin.
Damien:No. But there there was a phrase memento mori, you know, all things die or we all That's from
Lily:twenty eight years later, isn't it?
Damien:It's in there. For sure. Finds That's right. But that's a it's a thing. Like, you get a coin, kind of.
Lily:Momentomori is death Yeah. Come. Right?
Damien:Everything dies. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. So I think it's maybe but the photos had a name that sort of suggested that, but I think it I don't know whether that that they they deliberately did it when they were dead because it was like that was part of the whole idea of the photo.
Damien:It was like
Lily:That was the purpose?
Damien:Yeah. To take a photo with your dead relative.
Lily:Oh, it was
Damien:It does seem like you would wait to the wait to not be dead. But I I don't know. I again, it's like, it it is one of those many things about Victorian, you know, times that is It
Lily:was a different time. Different time.
Damien:People walk much faster than they on Hammer.
Lily:God. They did. What was it? And when did they stop doing this?
Damien:I don't know.
Lily:Try to look it up.
Damien:You can look up if you want. I think I should. Please go look at well researched again, obviously. Like, they did
Lily:a stop taking post mortem photos.
Damien:With family.
Lily:And what's thinking? Nineteen thirties. Oh, because death moved from home to hospitals. Oh, That's interesting.
Damien:So, okay. So my uncle Jerry pops it at home. You pop him up in his favorite chair, paint eyes on him Yeah. Take a photo.
Lily:It's because no one could stop you, basically. Yeah. That's why. Because I can. Yeah.
Lily:I think it's the right woman.
Damien:Yeah. It's like, do you think it would be good to paint uncle Jerry's eyes on and take a photo with him?
Lily:Oh, okay. Also
Damien:We're like we're doing live for Easter.
Lily:Okay. So yeah. But that's fine. That's fine. I'm happy with that.
Lily:Okay. So one reason it faded out was because portable cameras made photography cheap and easy. Ugh. Gross. However but also, World War, first one Yeah.
Lily:And modern sanitation changed how society viewed and processed grief. So I guess maybe people thought it was gross eventually. We learned more about germs.
Damien:Sure. Okay.
Lily:Hippocrates, and who was actually the person who
Damien:Well, the germ thing.
Lily:Developed germs. Yeah.
Damien:Developed germs?
Lily:Not developed germs, but, like, discovered germs. Was
Damien:it? I can't what?
Lily:Oh, no.
Damien:I think it was a.
Lily:I was gonna say that because past past childhood
Damien:Post Traversation. Yeah. Yeah. But I don't I don't know. That was back to oh, dear.
Lily:I did medicine through time in my history GCSE. Can you tell I subscribed school?
Damien:Yeah. Because you got no fucking idea. About as much as I have.
Lily:Gems. Okay. But this is okay. Yes. Louie Faster.
Lily:Weren't discovered a single person, but through a series of breakthroughs in the nineteenth century. So that tracks with the postmodern photography.
Damien:So that is a case of let's not cuddle uncle Jerry with the kids when he's dead Yeah. Because not very hygienic. Yeah. Also, how do they die?
Lily:Also, on brand, but another person who contributed was Robert Cock. Fantastic. Robert Cock. Good dog. Cock's postulates.
Lily:Feel like that's what you call our fan base. What?
Damien:Sounds horrible. Our fan base first of all, presumptuous, got a
Lily:fan base.
Damien:I know. I know. I know it's a slight joke.
Lily:From Banafus. Sorry. Jack and Cassie and Dan. Shout out to the number.
Damien:Dan a fan? Dan's a fan. Yeah. He is. Is.
Damien:But, okay, so that's back to the spookiness of these things, and otherwise creepy.
Lily:Well, this, I was gonna add on it because although it faded out, what's creepy is it's not actually gone. It's not creepy, guess. It's a part of a process, but organizations still do it for, like, parents whose, like, babies have died.
Damien:Oh, no. Mhmm. Oh, no.
Lily:Yeah, which, like, I can kind of understand, but also that is
Damien:It's a challenging subject, because you don't know what it feels like to be there.
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:And, like, oh, I don't oh, I think I find that more sad I find it sad and creepy. Yeah. Whereas, like, a dude who's just popped it because he's coughed too loud or something and then just got, oh.
Lily:Wouldn't you be scared? Because you know there's that thing of, like, once people are dead, they can still, like, move. Yeah. Especially if you've put grandpa Yes. In his chair, and the next thing is he's like, like
Damien:Imagine. Because you know that gas, when he's in the body. Yeah. Imagine you popped up grandpa. This is slow, elongated fart, and you would have taken the photos.
Damien:Like, granddad's farting, and he's dead. Yeah. That's pretty creepy.
Lily:But Unless it was something you did all the time, and then you'd be like, classic grandpa. It's almost like he's still with us. His last hurrah.
Damien:Yes. He is. Think he made a trap.
Lily:He's followed through this side. He's followed through with with blood and guts. Oh, god. Literally.
Damien:But the creepiness of that photography also is just all the fact that anything photographed in that time period looks scary.
Lily:Because it's like gray. Right.
Damien:And Not even black eyes are really like
Lily:And like rings under their eyes.
Damien:Everything looks grainy, and then the shadow is everywhere.
Lily:And the clothes are pretty
Damien:vignetting, you know, like the darkest around the edges of the photos. Yeah. Everything looks scary as shit when it's old, ain't it?
Lily:It kinda does.
Damien:Yeah. That Old, yeah. Scary. But
Lily:there isn't specific specificity there, though, because you've got, like, vintage old is not Yeah. Necessarily scary.
Damien:Think old's good, and kitsch Yeah. Is kind of like, that's fine. But it's like the the darkness of the things. Yeah. The toe and it's also like, why did Victorians and I remember because I saw photos like kids at my grandmother's house, her family, but they were always so rigid, like, kind of and and did not smile.
Damien:Yeah. You know? And the kids looked like they'd just been beaten up. Know, all these photos are just like super sad, and then the mother matriarch is, like, kind of like Yeah. Like this, and the grandpa's got a pipe.
Damien:Yeah. And it's just all a bit like
Lily:Very serious.
Damien:Yeah. You don't laugh in your house, do you?
Lily:I wonder why that was. Because can't It's a have been, like, a thing that it's how humans bond, right? Like, having fun with each other. So that would have been something that's come with evolution. Yeah.
Lily:So the fact that at some point, that's like, we don't do that, and then we've managed to
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:Push through that. It's so interesting how humans go through I the
Damien:wonder how much it was that kind of like this sort of stoicism of, like, particularly
Lily:men. And religion as well. Must be. I think I think yeah. I think a lot
Damien:of it. Think it's like, you know, men were sort of bred for for war and and and politics, you know? And then I suppose if your wife laughed, it was kind of like, what? You're not controlling her. Yeah.
Damien:Yeah. So we'll shut your wife.
Lily:Yeah. Controlling Yeah.
Damien:The kids would definitely be seen and not heard, and that was a phrase that was pretty
Lily:Yeah. That's well known. Yeah.
Damien:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Lily:Man, well, I love how where that took us.
Damien:Well, you know, well, this is basically us having a cup of coffee in Coopers, isn't it? This is what happens.
Lily:Is a subject that gets brought
Damien:up. Exactly.
Lily:I love that. Even if we didn't know everything about it, but I think that's kind of the fun of it. That's the charm.
Damien:That is. We're not well researched.
Lily:We're not academic. Are. We know our things.
Damien:We know what we know, don't we?
Lily:Yeah. We know know. We know what we know, and we don't know what we don't know.
Damien:Exactly.
Lily:But you know what? That could be our catchphrase at the end.
Damien:I think it should be because it seems like a good disclaimer.
Lily:Yeah. That's true. Okay.
Damien:Cool. Okay. Why don't we talk about ants? Yeah. There's a word there which I can't read.
Damien:I know the word, but I don't know if I I I cannot
Lily:I don't don't even want to. Is it this one?
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:I you said it earlier, and it sounded like Yeah. Well, no.
Damien:I didn't know, but I can't remember it, so I'm gonna have to Dom these. Right.
Lily:Okay. Ophiocordyceps?
Damien:Ophiocordyceps. Yes. Aw. So cordyceps are mushrooms. Right?
Damien:And mushroom is a kind of
Lily:long guy. I was like, drug? I wasn't sure if you were going on it.
Damien:Well, they are. I think the one yeah. The magic mushroom is a type of cordycep. Anyway, ants. Embark on this little journey about ants and fungus.
Damien:It's a scary bloody thing about fungus. Right? We're all worried about things going bang, weather, climate, you know, stuff happening, meteors and that kind of thing, right, bang. But one thing we should always be worried about is fungus.
Lily:I mean, yeah, that's like mold, isn't it? Right. Spores, all of that. It's a silent killer.
Damien:But the temperature dictates whether or not a fungi will live or
Lily:not. Really? Yeah. I mean, that does make sense. So
Damien:and also, fungi wants to grow wherever it can possibly grow.
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:Right? So if, for example, there was a strain, you know how viruses mutate and change all the time? Fungus does the same. Yeah. So if there's ever a fungus that goes, oh, I'm gonna live in Lily's nose, for example, it'll it'll downwell grow there whether you like it or not.
Lily:Do the conditions not have to be optimum, though?
Damien:They do, but but maybe one day they will be. Right? And and fungi adapts and it adapts to climate change and humidity and all that stuff. Blah blah blah. So these ants already have this problem.
Damien:We don't as humans have it yet to the extent that ants do.
Lily:Ants have what problem?
Damien:This problem. Okay. With the right? So this fungus crawls into the ant, starts growing within the ant.
Lily:So the fungus moves, or does the ant eat?
Damien:The ant as it's yeah. So it's just the ant being in an environment where the fungus is.
Lily:So, like, almost even could be breathing it in Right.
Damien:Like spores. Touching, breathing, whatever it is. Yeah. Spores is the thing. Spores is how fungus will potentially get us.
Damien:Yeah. Because we're breathing that stuff in. And and fungus, when it when it goes, really likes to spread its load whenever it goes. Right. Focus.
Damien:I'm trying to. I'm thinking about, you know, but like a dandelion. Does this work? Okay. Anyway, so this fungus, this is a thing.
Damien:It gets into the ant, goes to the brain, and takes control of the motor skills of the ant. It now is basically puppeting the ant.
Lily:That's crazy.
Damien:It is crazy, but it's it happens all the time. And then the ant will now climb to a to a height where when it explodes, its head literally will go like this, and it will spray those spores over the entire colony of ants. And now all the ants have this shit, and so it goes and so it goes.
Lily:That is, like,
Damien:horrific. That is one of the scariest if you think about that objectively, that's one of the scariest things you ever will ever hear or see, but it happens. Ask David Attenborough.
Lily:Did a whole thing happen. Yeah. No. Like,
Damien:That is scary.
Lily:It's like the maximum, what's the other thing of, way to be successful in Yeah. Your
Damien:Exactly. So imagine this, right? You've now got this fungus in your nose, and you and I are chatting right now, and you're like, wait a minute, Doug. I've got a funny old I'm gonna have a sneeze. But then your eyes are like, now all of a sudden, you don't see me.
Damien:You just now have a desire to climb on my roof and just explode your head. That all my natives
Lily:infected get humans, I still have do you think the ants go to a height because they're on the ground, so they need to get maximum rain Yeah. The fungus makes
Damien:them get
Lily:height. Whereas if it was in us because we're already bigger Yeah. Do you think we'd get the instinct to climb, or do you think we'd just get the instinct to be near I
Damien:think you can find a crowd of people.
Lily:Other people so you can infect more.
Damien:Yeah. I think you just go straight to pub.
Lily:Because is the fungus a living Yes.
Damien:Thing, or is Yes. It the the is
Lily:of, like, the chemicals that result in this?
Damien:That I I don't know. You'll have to ask someone like Paul Stamets. He'd know that. But, like, what we do know is that if you even now went out, like, say, the woods and you started poking around on a bit of mycelium fungus, that network is like, goes on for thousands of miles. So over there, that bit of fungus knows, doesn't know you obviously, but it knows that something has stimulated that bit of fungus thousands of miles away.
Damien:Wow. And my single network is is crazy, and it is everywhere. Right?
Lily:That's so funny, these suburb. Because I was watching mating season on Netflix. It's like a new cartoon Yeah. Which is, like, fine. But there's a bit where they, like, go underneath, and it's the the mushroom, isn't it?
Lily:Going on about it all being, like, connected and how they talk and all of that. Right. So it's funny that you just pull that up.
Damien:Yeah. It's a it's a thing. So that, I think, is super scary. Now, that being said, right, there is a video game that's based on this called The Last of Us.
Lily:Yes.
Damien:So it's like another sort of it's almost like a zombie
Lily:was gonna say, apocalypse it's
Damien:but in this, the the fungus overtakes you. You then, you know, go and, yeah, you propagate by finding human beings and spreading their entire directive is just.
Lily:So is it propagated through heads exploding or biting or?
Damien:It's it's just everything in the end. It's just all the spores. There were, like, areas where there's just so many spores that you can't walk through it because you're gonna it's gonna happen to
Lily:Everyone's stuck.
Damien:Yeah. Exactly. It's just every most people is the but the last of us Yeah. Says it all. And so but but it's based on a very real possibility, and the buildup to it is very much that kind of thing of like a zombie film where it's kind of there are pockets of it having stars in India.
Damien:There's a pocket of it here. Someone comes over here. They're not feeling very well. You know?
Lily:So yeah. Like anything, isn't it?
Damien:Like COVID.
Lily:I was gonna say, like any disease. Yeah. So does it only at this point in time affect ants?
Damien:I think ants and maybe some wasps and stuff, but insects right now. Okay. Yeah.
Lily:God, so wasps, they fly, so they're
Damien:Wasps, yeah.
Lily:Whatever. So it's the smaller it's insects.
Damien:Insects right now. Now. But one day, Lily
Lily:Do you reckon? Might be eating
Damien:on a thick skin sausage.
Lily:Will Will weed. Don't mean
Damien:to frighten you, Lily. I feel like I frightened you.
Lily:Ophio cordy infect humans? People have already asked. A good question.
Damien:Have, yeah.
Lily:No, it cannot infect humans because our body temperature is too hot. There you go.
Damien:Phoebe, it's about temperature, but what happens if our body temperature drops through some, I don't know, climate situation?
Lily:It also says that these fungi, highly co evolved, specialize in specific insect physiologies, making them completely incompatible with complex mammalian nervous immune systems.
Damien:For now.
Lily:So I've you just let it go.
Damien:Well, I don't want to be, like, plagued by fungus, but anyway
Lily:It even says, while other fungal pathogens exist, pop culture scenarios like The Last of Us remain strictly science fiction.
Damien:Listen. If
Lily:Listen.
Damien:Science fiction.
Lily:To be fair, it says the last false apocalypse is not realistic, but rising threat of fungal dot dot dot. Fungal patterns is, and it quite literally is the end. Isn't that the worst title of a thingy ever?
Damien:That's pretty bad.
Lily:That's pretty Yeah.
Damien:I just realized we've not been recording through either of our microphones.
Lily:So that not have recorded anything?
Damien:Well, it
Lily:was Okay.
Damien:Well, it's sapling. So maybe something's going on, and I will check-in, like, when we finish this, and I'll cut this whole bit out.
Lily:We're not far off, to be fair.
Damien:Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I'm not sure what he thinks is recording through.
Lily:Is there normally a lot does that mean we turned it off when it buzzed?
Damien:Oh, shit. Maybe I turned their audio on. It doesn't matter. It just means it's recording on these, but it's probably recording in there, and it's fine. We will find out, Lily.
Damien:But it's been a good test run.
Lily:Mean, has. I'll talk about But I was showing you how bad that title is. Oh, the rising threat of fungal pathogens is. Oh, the end.
Damien:The definitive is.
Lily:But I thought it was just, you know, oh, I think you can listen to this article. Anyway, think it's the heat. It's the heat that's making
Damien:me Yeah. Okay. So anyway, that is a pretty scientifically scary thing. Yeah. The possibility the fact that it exists in ants is pretty bad.
Lily:It literally makes them suicidal. Yeah. It's kinda like there's definitely horror films to do that. Is it The Happening?
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:Where there's, like, a something in the air, and they people just start killing themselves.
Damien:Yeah. That is yeah. That yeah.
Lily:Yeah. Must be a virus, but I haven't watched that in years.
Damien:That's a good film, actually.
Lily:It is, yeah.
Damien:Yeah. They just start dropping, don't they?
Lily:And it's the same as Smile, actually. Yeah. They kill themselves and then, like, pass it on.
Damien:Yeah. But that's like a one to one thing, isn't it? They just pass it on to the next.
Lily:Yes. Yeah. It's not an infect it's not a widespread infection.
Damien:Yeah. That you can kind of deal with. Not nice, but hopefully it will happen to you.
Lily:You say you can kind of deal with, but not once the smile's following you, you can't.
Damien:But only, like, if it's you.
Lily:Yeah. So Which we're it would be in this In this Like, we're not just like, oh, look. He's seeing the smile. Poor old sod. Yeah.
Lily:Uh-oh. I wouldn't wanna be him. Yeah. Yeah.
Damien:So I just choke you on my beard.
Lily:Getting emotional. Yeah. I'm getting emotional about the happening. Unlikely when people just fall over for no reason. Fall over.
Lily:Oh, gosh. Right. Where are we at, Lily? We are basically coming to the end. Oh, what?
Lily:Yeah. Well, okay. Which, to be fair, is still good going.
Damien:It is not bad going.
Lily:I see. So
Damien:okay. This is the point where probably then we need to invite anyone who's listening
Lily:Mhmm.
Damien:To send us anything
Lily:That they find creepy.
Damien:Yeah. Anything that gives them the Willies. Willies. Right? And I think when I publish this, if we publish this
Lily:Yeah, I mean if the sound is That would be devastating because this has been fun.
Damien:It has been fun. It has been fun.
Lily:A good
Damien:driver on in here. But, yeah, but the means to send us some just send us things that yeah. Give me the Willies. Where are they gonna send it? Well, this is it.
Damien:I'm gonna give them an email address to send stuff to.
Lily:Lovely.
Damien:Yeah. I already know what the email address is. I just can't remember all of it, and I might wanna say it wrong now because it's not been used for a while.
Lily:So you're not going to tell them this thing?
Damien:Not now, but I will put it in the show notes.
Lily:Okay. Cool. Show notes. But also there's Instagram, though. There is Instagram.
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:Yeah. There is. Are you gonna run Instagram for us this time?
Lily:Sure. You're not?
Damien:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But so I I don't know.
Damien:Well, we need to find a way of, like, rounding this whole thing off, don't we?
Lily:But that's why we need a catchphrase,
Damien:isn't it? We well, okay.
Lily:If anyone can think of a really good play on words for our podcast being called The Willies Yeah. How we close it off.
Damien:What kind of
Lily:Do our work for us.
Damien:Yeah. Do our work for us. And but what kind of thing could it be?
Lily:What I'm quite happy with we know what we know, and we don't
Damien:know, to be honest. We don't know what we don't know, and that gives us the Willies. No. That doesn't work. That doesn't work.
Damien:But I think we can expand on what we got here. Yeah. I think. For sure. I think.
Lily:This is just the start.
Damien:Yeah. And I think that, like, you know, being able to kind of I don't know. There's there's lots of things that happen and things that are around which are deeply disturbing. Yeah. In fact, you don't have look too far to find these things No.
Damien:Most of the time. And we can talk about this shit to the girls.
Lily:Yeah. I was thinking I've already in my head thinking, like, we're going back to those photos and, like, pictures that follow you. It makes me think about, like, we went on a school trip in year four to a place called Often Court. Often Court. And I had to go through the library to get to my room Mhmm.
Lily:Which was so far away, and the library had a portrait of a woman that, oh my god, did the eyes follow you. Don't mind, you're, like, eight in year four.
Damien:Yeah. That is terrifying.
Lily:And it was I used to, like, run through. It was so scary. And the problem is as well, like, your imagination runs wild with you because you're in a room with, like, four other eight year old girls who are already, like, freaked out just because the building's, like,
Damien:bombed Yeah. And
Lily:So then, like, one of them thinks they've seen a figure in the shower, so then you're all crying, and it just sort of escalates, doesn't it?
Damien:This is the funny thing as well, I think, about even as adults, but certainly when you're kids, is the ability to scare each other.
Lily:It's your imagination. It's your worst enemy.
Damien:It takes one person to begin Yeah. The whole, like, you know
Lily:Saying that, though, you know it's really scary when you have a collective experience of something Yeah. Because it's not then your imagination because someone else has heard it. For example Yeah. In so my old house in Newbury is quite a big old house, so it would mainly know you from Newbury. I was born in Newbury.
Damien:Were you?
Lily:Yeah. I'd love a bit in Newbury. I only moved here in, like,
Damien:2010. My friend lives in the one I was talking about with the scary photo, just quickly, lives in Bedam, which is you got that place called World's End? Just outside Newbury? And then Oh, I thought you'd know your Oh, local yeah.
Lily:I've moved when I was, like, 13, so you know your spatial awareness of it's the way your school is and where the town is.
Damien:I feel like
Lily:you where the leisure center is.
Damien:Okay. I
Lily:will show you on
Damien:a map later. Okay. Maybe like, anyway, so we continue.
Lily:Oh, yeah. Me and my sister, what, we probably were like 11 and seven. Would my mom leave us at home by ourselves probably?
Damien:It's illegal, but, yeah.
Lily:We were getting a bit of a creep. We must have been older then, but I remember feeling young.
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:Is it a lingo? No. Don't know. No. It's not.
Lily:There's no minimum age. It's whatever you feel is.
Damien:Does your child feel responsible?
Lily:Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That makes sense. No, it's definitely not.
Lily:And so we're at home, and we're getting a bit freaked out by the noises, and we're like, oh, gosh. And, like, our stairs are the ones that went, like, up and around, and then there was, a landing. Oh, yeah. You couldn't see, like, everything. And so we're getting ourselves a bit worse half, and we're like, oh, we're gonna when this is back when phones were, like, you know, plugged into the wall, so you had to go and, like, dial You remember
Damien:those bake lights?
Lily:It was green.
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:And It
Damien:was green.
Lily:It was green.
Damien:Just for context.
Lily:And so we're going to the phone, and then we hear, like, a noise, and we're both kind of, like, oh, God. And then this sounds so pathetic when I say it out loud, but I'm not joking. We heard, a child's voice go, boom. Like, literally. And both of us ran right under the blanket.
Lily:I mean, my sister went under the blanket. She left me out in the open to be sacrificed because
Damien:Offer your The bones to
Lily:spirit. And I'm like, but to me, like, we both heard that noise because it went boom. We both looked at each other straight away. Yeah. That's scary.
Lily:So I know that that wasn't just me because she experienced it too.
Damien:Well, how do you talk about that now? Is that a thing that you still occasionally kind of refer back to? Like, did we definitely hear that?
Lily:I don't really talk to you. Oh, okay. Oh, well,
Damien:I don't mean to be like family politics. Sorry about that.
Lily:But I imagine if I brought it up. I think it probably had more of an impact on me, to be honest, because I was much younger.
Damien:Yeah. But you're right. The shared experience thing, this isn't really part of our format for our show, but I quite like this because it's reminded me of when my brother and I, we used to swim over the River Thames and then climb Winter Hill. In fact, we know the deal. We do that.
Damien:We know that. But when we were little kids, we swerved the river, and then occasionally, we just keep on going all the up the top of the hill, come back down again, swim across the river, back to the sailing club. One day, my brother and I swerved the river, went up the top. We're about halfway up the hill, and he stops. You know when someone stops and they sing something and you're you have that instinct straight away that they're looking at something bad?
Damien:So I stopped too, and I'm like, what's up, Don? Like that, and he's he's pointed. It's it's nothing like, you know, not like a dead dude or anything or whatever, but there were these creatures that look shit. You know, they look like lions, but like reddish hair, and there were about four of them. Right?
Lily:Did this actually happen?
Damien:Yes. Yes. It did happen. Right? And my brother and I were, like, scared.
Damien:Well, do you know what it did? It put the Willies up us big time. So we ran down and we swam, like, and we're saying to our parents, like, these things are they were like, you know, talking nonsense, blah blah blah. Turns out, these things did exist, but they were like, for some reason, they had some of those, like, Angus cows up there, the big shaggy red haired things. Well, hyaline cows.
Damien:Yeah, that kind of thing. But they were on the hill for some reason, and they were lying down. So at like a anyway.
Lily:Distance. Right. It wasn't a game.
Damien:But it was like we'd seen nothing like it before. Yeah. And as and little kids
Lily:Yeah.
Damien:Like on an adventure. Yeah. It was like, what is that? And maybe my brother embellished it a bit to me, but we were you know where I say when you kind of get that giggle fear thing?
Lily:Yeah. Where it's like,
Damien:start running, yeah, and then they both, like, laughing but really scared at the same time. That's exactly what happened. Yeah. So you're like full tilt down the hill.
Lily:That is such a real thing. You either, like, cry or you laugh. Those are your two, like, reactions, I'm It's just when you can
Damien:when you're escaping from that scary thing, then there's that nervous giggle that if you're running away from something that is scary, because I think there's something you're like, am I gonna get away or not? Yeah.
Lily:And it
Damien:makes you giggle because it's like,
Lily:oh, I think I'm okay. To be fair, I think that does this is does I'm saying this like this happens often, but, like, if someone chases me, like, I'll probably, like, get into a bit of a laugh. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's nervous Yeah.
Damien:Yeah.
Lily:Laughter. But, like, it's like a bit of a scream, bit of a
Damien:laugh. Yeah.
Lily:Like, if someone chases you up the stairs Uh-huh. It's like I'm, like Yeah. Almost like you're being tickled. It's like, you know, it's uncomfortable laughter.
Damien:Yeah. You don't want it to happen, but it's happening. Yeah. Yeah. I do a thing with my wife where I'm I'm really good, I think.
Damien:I'll show you later in Friday.
Lily:Oh, Sean. Where is this going? Keep getting to the point.
Damien:I think I'm very good. I've studied the movement of zombies. Right? And I think I'm pretty damn good. I used do this thing called the zombie walker every now and again, like I've done one of them.
Damien:Right, right. So the foot drag, the like
Lily:You always do that. You look like Simon Pegg does sort of dead. And you do your impression.
Damien:You mean
Lily:the same mouth?
Damien:When I first saw that, I gave Simon a thought, yes. It's a broken book. But I do that to Lee when she walks upstairs. I'll do the zombie walk behind her.
Lily:I bet she loves that.
Damien:I keep saying now, put the Willies over, but I think I mean, my face is warm. My fingers don't say that.
Lily:It scares her.
Damien:Oh, shit. Anyway, yeah. Yeah.
Lily:Yeah. I had something I was gonna add to that, and I had completely gone out. Oh, man. Can't remember. But yeah.
Lily:Okay. Well, that was a fun little ad.
Damien:I like that. But I think it would yeah. Shared fear is like, that is that archetypal, like, high school kids go to camp, they start telling horror stories, and eventually, like, someone tells the story. You know when you get that at the one kid? And they're like, you tell us your story, and they're like, you don't wanna hear my story.
Damien:Yeah. Fuck, because their story's real. Yeah. And they start telling that story, and it's like, oh, shit.
Lily:I think I was that kid. I have good ghost stories, but I think we should save
Damien:this for another episode. I mean, yeah. Ghost stories are good stories. I've got a few. I used to be I spent a lot of time in an all saints church in Marlow, and that place well, put it this way.
Damien:I used to enjoy bringing the bell ringers there to eat. Yeah. But one thing happened one day, and I never climbed those stairs ever again.
Lily:And that is a perfect thing. I have to leave
Damien:that on, isn't it? I'm do this. You're leaning real close, though.
Lily:Can you look how shiny your side. Look how shiny you are. Yeah. But when you head down to the side, as you are.
Damien:Yeah. Oh, well, I see. I see.
Lily:Is it just like because you turned, and it was like a new surface that I hadn't seen. A new surface.
Damien:Is it is it giving you the same horrible feeling as seeing a thick skinned sausage?
Lily:It's such yes. Nearly. Nearly.
Damien:Oh, I see. Okay. Then. Well, if you got this far, well done.
Lily:If it even gets up like five, I'm gonna be really fucking sad. Listen. If not.
Damien:These things happen, technical glitches. But, yeah, thanks for listening.
Lily:Yeah. See you next time.
Damien:See you next time. Just quickly, though. Joe's nice. What? Sitting here chatting shit with you again.
Lily:Yeah. It is nice.
Damien:Really chat shit. What's happening? Say goodbye. Look. Say bye to those under over there look.
Damien:Bye, people. Bye.