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The Noon Hour Of Madness & Mayhem can be heard live on KBEAR 101 weekdays at 12pm MST. Viktor and Peaches talk about a wide variety of topics depending on the day and you never know what to expect!
[upbeat music] The noon hour of Madness and Mayhem, the podcast.
This is the noon hour of Madness and Mayhem. I'm Victor.
I'm Peaches, and as a tribute to Bonnie Tyler, I'll listen to Total Eclipse of the k- the, the, of the Heart on my walk today.
Aw, Peaches, how nice.
That's right.
Just crying.
Turn around-
[laughs]
... every now and then.
[laughs]
I told you off the air that I, uh, saw another moth inside my apartment, and so I got inspired and I updated the soundboard. I updated your soundboard as well.
All right.
Right there at the very bottom.
Hold on.
There should be three different sound bits.
I gotta move a lot of things around to get into my soundboard here.
Okay, where did, uh
... All right, that go. All right. Almost there, Peaches. All right, you got three new ones for me.
Oh, not this one. No, it's under the Supervisor tab.
Uh, okay. Well,
not there.
It's not there either.
Okay, hang on. We g- we gotta shift things around again.
Shit, I thought I set it up for you, and you just decided to-
Did you just swear?
No, I s- I said, "C, I thought I just set it up for you."
Oh, I thought you said, "S, I thought I set it up for you."
[laughs]
I w- mm, let's see. Let's try this one.
Supervisor.
There you go, very bottom there.
Okay.
See Ebon right there?
There. I'll be home at night. [laughs]
There you go.
I appreciate that, Peaches. And we've got- Well, yeah. Yeah. Them rats. All right. Those are necessary additions. I will fix up the rest of my other button bar so I've got them on there as well. So [laughs] thank you, Peaches.
Every time I see a moth now, I just think of Devin Townsend.
And you think about how he'll- I'll be home at night ...
see, when I see a moth, I think- Them rats ... I don't like them, you know?
Vessel, do you like moths?
I, I would think he does. Well, yeah.
Well, sorry.
Yeah.
You didn't have to answer it all aggressively.
[laughs]
Geez.
Well, um, good luck with your moth infestation, Peaches. Do- does it come along with some epic prog metal?
No, not at all.
[laughs] Oh.
It just comes with a lot of, uh, a lot of me chasing the moth around my place, trying to get it out of there, you know? It was, it was right next to the new picture frames on the wall.
Ah, you need to get a cat, dude.
No.
Cat- cats'll eat them.
Heck no.
Yeah, they like them. They're a delicious snack. It's fun for them to play with.
It's super annoying trying to game with my friend Bryson now.
He- does he have a cat?
Uh, th- they, they have the two kittens, and it's just like
every time I try playing Grounded II,
"Oh, oh, he, he diarrhea'd on the carpet again. Br- Bryson or the cat?" [laughs]
[laughs] Yeah, um, I understand that pain. Cats are filthy little beasts, and, uh, I have too many of them, so I, I get it, Peaches. But, you know, they'll grow up eventually and leave them alone while they, uh, play video games. Just give it a year or so. [laughs]
Well, they just keep pooping.
[laughs]
They keep d- uh, diarrheeing all over the floor.
Sounds like they've got a bad diet then.
Yeah.
Yeah, like, Bryson, you gotta get it together, bro, with these kittens. All right? You gotta, you know, get them litter box trained, and if their dookie is coming out n- as liquid, you're not feeding them properly, [laughs] all right? Talk to the vet. They'll help you out with a good diet for, uh, kittens with diarrhea. All right? Anybody out there dealing with pet diarrhea.
I hate the obsession that new pet owners get because it's like we're trying to sit there, play a game.
His fiancee comes walking in, "Uh, babe, you gotta see the kittens. You gotta see the kittens."
[laughs] I still do that.
And, and then he's, he's the happy wife, happy life kind of guy, so he's like, "Okay," and then gets up and goes.
I still do that. I'll be like, "Oh, Becca, look at Koopa."
But you-
"He's being cute"
... but you're not in the middle of, like, a boss battle.
No, not necessarily.
No, if you're playing, if you're, like-
[laughs]
... deep into a game, like Red Dead Redemption 2, you're deep into a shootout with the O'Driscolls and Becca comes running and goes, "Babe, look at the, look at the kitten. Look at the ki- " are you gonna be like, "Okay"?
Well, I play single player, so I can just pause.
[laughs] I got nobody else relying on my help.
It doesn't help. That the ... yeah.
[laughs]
'Cause from my, if me, if me and Bryson are full on, like, in the middle of a battle and she thinks he can just drop everything, why don't you just pause it? She, she seems like one of those, "Why don't you just pause it?"
[laughs] Oh, yeah.
Like, you can do that in an online multiplayer game. Come on.
[laughs]
Why don't you just pause the game?
[laughs]
Just pause the Nintendo.
[laughs] 'Cause all video game systems are a Nintendo?
Yeah, my parents used to blame everything-
[laughs]
... on video games and wrestling. If I talked back to them, my m- mom would be like, "He's watching that stupid wrestling. He's learning to talk trash, insult us."
[laughs]
I'm like, "I'll beat you at WrestleMania, Mom."
I'll be home at night.
I'll be wiping up diarrhea.
[laughs] Sorry, I cut you off.
That's fine.
[laughs] Well, Peaches, I was reading this article about dating.
Okay.
Don't ask me why.
Sure.
I was, uh, you know, looking for content. And-
You're looking for your second wife?
Hey. [laughs] Looking for dating tips. [laughs]
Magically, Victor has a burner phone.
No, but dating for some people is so weird. Like, I don't know. When it came to dating for me, there was no, like, typical dating process. You just, you're, like, hanging out, and all of a sudden you're hooked up.
Did you ask Becca if she was Shreking you?
[laughs] Isn't that, is that where she finds an ugly dude?
[laughs] So he worships the ground she walks on.
[laughs] It's what all my, uh, all my exes have done.
[laughs]
[laughs] At least you don't look like an ogre.
I don't know.
Like somebody in here.
[laughs]
Donkey.
[laughs] Well, this woman, she got mad 'cause I guess during a date, like, she'd already talked to this guy, and he told her he didn't have kids, and then during the date, he's like, "Hey, I actually do have a kid," and so she got mad and left the date Which, okay, whatever. 'Cause she said that, uh, sh- she doesn't want kids, and kids are, like, a non-negotiable when it comes to-
Sure
... dating.
I get it, yeah.
But what I thou- thought was weird about this was, you know, she had talked to the guy on the phone before the date. They chatted for about 30 minutes to go over the date and, you know, determine whether there were any little things like that,
you know, that were gonna be deal breakers before they even went out, like, together. I don't know.
Sometimes you could look past a lot of things, I would think, that are, like, deal breaker type situations. 'Cause y- you're not gonna find a perfect person, everybody. I hate to break it to you. You are not going to find a person ever that, like, clicks every single little box and does everything the way you want them to do it. It's just not gonna happen.
That's until you find the one, like Travis and Taylor.
Oh, God. [laughs]
[laughs]
Oh, I bet their home life, yeah. They're-
Yeah, what is that like?
They're just screaming at each other.
There's all these fake stories popping up online now. I'm trying my best to, you know, get legitimate information so I can talk about it on Z103.
Mm-hmm.
And there was one about, like, a $2 billion prenup or something like that, and how she's not allowed to write any songs about him.
[laughs]
Something.
It could be. It could be. I liked Papa Meats song that, uh, Taylor Swift, [laughs] you know, wrote about him. Did you ever watch that episode?
No, I haven't seen that one yet.
So it- it's an episode on the Meat Canyon channel, uh, where he makes fun of Swifties.
Okay.
And it's, it's really good. Taylor Swift is, like, a monster in it, and, uh, there's a, a pretty fun song.
I did like the one, uh, the one joke that people have been saying where it's like, oh, she got married on July 3rd, so that way if they get divorced she can call the next album Independence Day.
Ah, yeah. [laughs]
And just talk about how bad the Chiefs are-
[laughs]
... how much she hates,
uh, she hates football as a whole. You know.
Yeah.
I'm hoping they don't get divorced. I'm hoping they ... I'm rooting for the best for them, you know?
I hope it's a terrible marriage.
I know Jelly Roll's about to release some of the most heartbreaking stuff.
Oh.
I know Bunny XO
already has gone to the club, and she's full on kissing some gu- some guy half her age.
And wasn't it at Jelly Roll's club?
Maybe.
That's what I read.
Oh, this poor guy.
I read a headline.
He's, he's been through prison.
Oh.
He's already lost 250 pounds.
This poor guy.
This poor dude.
Yeah, poor Jelly Roll. He's got, uh-
He only talks to God when he needs a favor.
[laughs] He's got millions of dollars.
He's a dead man walking.
[laughs] Yeah, yeah.
He's a son of a sinner.
He's got a real problem. [laughs] All right, Peaches, you're our resident sports guy. Is-
Sure
... is the World Cup, like, over? Is it still going?
Oh, I don't pay attention to soccer.
I don't know. It's the big thing right now that-
Yeah, but I, I avoid-
... everybody seems to be talking about
... soccer like the plague. I hate that sport.
[laughs] Why? It's-
I, it's so stupid
... it's basketball with your feet.
No, it's not.
Yeah, [laughs] sure it is.
The score is one nothing. You got all these dudes, ugh, you know?
[laughs] Well, anyway, I talked about yesterday, I guess a lot of, uh, tourists who are coming to the US have fallen in love with ranch dressing.
Oh, yeah, of course, there's that. They're, um, they're also getting VIP tours of Walmart.
That's what I was just looking at.
Sure, yeah.
Walmart offering VIP tours. Can you imagine, you take a vacation to another country, and you're like, "I gotta go to the grocery store to check it out."
Well, imagine you're from, like, Bulgaria-
Okay
... of all places. You come to th- come to the United States, and you're like, "What on earth is that?" That's a Bass Pro Shop. You ever been inside one of those places?
[laughs] I have been inside one.
The, the gi- the giant fish tank.
Mm-hmm.
That people, people kept jumping in.
[laughs] All right. I guess when I was in Mexico, I did enjoy going to the, uh, the Mexican grocery store because they had a lot-
And yelling out, "Exceso calories!"
Yeah. I loved how e- all the stuff that was delicious said exceso calories on it. So any time I see a package that says that, I, I get very excited.
Get a little giddy, you know?
Like, you know it's gonna be good 'cause it's exceso calories. Uh, that means, like, lots of calories, everybody.
No kidding.
[laughs]
Imagine being that person that comes from Bulgaria, goes to Costco, and sees a five pound tub of Duke's Mayo.
[laughs] Like, "Dude, look at that. That's the most mayo I've ever seen." [laughs] Yeah. Um, instant mac and cheese sold by the gallon.
Yeah, there's that.
Yeah.
Yeah, I forgot about that.
People are loving it. They're just loving it, getting to explore the oversized products, iconic snack aisles, and the uniquely American finds.
I mean, you go to the gas station, you can get a bucket of soda for, like, 75 cents.
That's true. That's probably pretty impressive to somebody from somewhere else. You know, just straight sugar.
Oh, there's, there's a huge difference between Fanta here and Fanta over in Europe. There's a picture of the two of them side by side.
Well, I will say, you know, if you buy soda, like in Mexico, it's way better 'cause they all use real sugar.
Mm-hmm.
They don't use high fructose corn syrup.
Yeah.
Uh, I think I've had Fanta in Mexico, and it was really good. It was delish.
Exceso calories.
Exceso calories. I had a Fanta the other day. You saw it sitting there?
Yeah.
It's in the garbage. It wasn't good. I, I wasn't very happy about it. There's very little soda that I like anymore. Very picky. Do we got sales coming back?
No, it's just the client recording.
Okay. All right. Just wanna make sure.
Yeah.
But-
There's FJ, though. FJ.
FJ.
Come on in here, dude.
Yeah.
He just screamed, "What?" Like Stone Cold from the hallway.
What? What's up, FJ? Jump on, uh, this mic over here.
That one right there.
This one? Yeah. That, that one'll be good. Okay.
We're talking about, uh, the international fans of the World Cup coming to the United States, and, uh- Seeing Walmart and getting VIP tours of Walmart
Oh yeah, yeah. You know, picking up all them unique American goods. And then we were talking about how soda is better in other countries than here.
Soda is better in other countries than here?
Oh, yeah. You know, like, if you go to a Mexican restaurant, get one of those glass bottles of Coke.
Oh, yeah, those are ... Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. It's 'cause they use that real sugar.
Mm-hmm. Yeah, and if you, like, buy a 12-pack of, like, Pepsi with the real sugar at the grocery store-
It's way better
... so much better.
Who do they choose to be the tour guide for these things?
"Hi, welcome to Walmart."
[laughs]
The, that person that's at the front. They don't ... I guess they don't really greet anymore, do they?
No.
They just kind of sit there.
They don't even check receipts anymore. I think they got bullied into not doing that.
Yeah, I think you gotta walk out with, like, a TV for them to check.
Right.
You know, some large, expensive item. But-
Apparently TSA's had a problem with people trying to take full bottles of ranch dressing-
Mm-hmm
... back home with them.
Mm-hmm. We were talking about that as well.
Which I get. Ranch dressing is delicious.
I agree.
Wait, so they find out about fry sauce?
Oh. Keep that secret, Peaches.
Oh, sorry.
Yeah. We don't need more people knowing here.
Idaho's full. [upbeat music]
All right, Peaches. You're from California-
No kidding
... as, as everybody knows. So let's, let's talk California and fireworks. Are fireworks a big thing there like they are here?
I think my dad and his friends are the reasons why, um, fireworks are illegal in Seal Beach.
Mm.
Because I think one of his friends threw a firework on somebody's house-
Oh
... and caught the roof on fire.
Wow. Uh-
Uh, but what's funny is that there's my parents' neighborhood, College Park East.
Mm-hmm.
But then literally right down the street, kind of like the di- the distance between my neighborhood and your neighborhood-
Okay. All right
... or that, that far away is a neighborhood that, where fireworks are legal.
Oh, wow.
So my parents just drive down the street and go watch people launch fireworks, watch the different shows all around. That neighborhood is so united when it comes to holidays. I mean, they'll shut down entire blocks-
Wow
... and have parties together. They'll ride bicycles with American flags all over. They, they'll have a good time over there.
All right.
Seal Beach is just quiet. It's all the old people.
Okay. Are the aerial fireworks legal in those areas?
Uh-
Like mortars and-
I wouldn't think so, no.
Okay. Well, I just had two different articles about people blowing their hands off in California pop up. And so [laughs] these are both places that you're familiar with. And I was curious if you'd ever seen fireworks at these locations, one of them being In-N-Out Burger.
[laughs]
[laughs]
Hey, you know what? If somebody lit a firework as, if I was on the job, I'd be, I'd be thrilled.
Yeah, 18-year-old teenager, he's down to one hand now-
Good for him
... after, after, uh, playing with fireworks outside of a California In-N-Out Burger. He had just graduated from high school three days earlier and blew his hand off in the parking lot.
Need a hand to get to college?
Oh.
[laughs] Uh-
He's all right now
... it says a classmate handed him a firework about the size of a tennis ball which exploded almost immediately after he lit it. Mu- must have been a mortar. Around ... I'm, I'm guessing it's gotta be a mortar, and it just blew up in his hand. I mean, there was one guy that a mortar blew up in his hand, and he's dead.
I w- I just read a story-
He just straight up died.
I read a story yesterday about how some guy was cleaning up the beach in California.
[laughs] That was the other one I was gonna get to. [laughs]
And the, the, the undetonated firework blew up in his hand.
Which is crazy.
And then I just read another story too about how there's this new toy called Nee Doh. They're like these squishy cubes.
Okay. H- how do you spell it, N-E-E-D-O?
Yeah, N-
Oh
... E-
With an H
... yeah, yeah, there you go.
The Nee Doh squishy shop.
And so in order for people to make it even more squishy, they're putting it in the microwave or putting it in a hot place, and the gel on the inside is getting so hot that they're exploding-
Oh my geez. [laughs]
... and causing bur- like second or third degree burns on children. And they're going to the doctors with these screaming kids that are just burnt to g- they look like Freddy Krueger.
[laughs] Kids, I talked about, uh, plasma cannons earlier.
Oh, yeah, 'cause the high school break-in. [laughs]
E- yes. Ev- it was a TikTok thing I didn't know about. How to build a plasma cannon. I'm like, "Kids, don't watch these videos. Don't build a plasma cannon." Uh, don't nuke [laughs] the, the, the gooey, squishy toys. Like, can you imagine having to take your kid to the doctor because the, uh, the Nee Doh sh- uh, trippy shroom blew up in their hand? [laughs] Or the Nee Doh gummy bear?
Or it's, like, sticking to their skin and just burning-
Holy cow
... their skin.
Yeah, I knew that squishy things were popular right now, but I hadn't heard of specifically these ones. I've seen the little squishy, like, they're like l- look like a blob or a jellyfish or something.
I just saw, I just read something from a, a post from this one lady where she goes, "I, I, I, I had a feeling I would get old to where I don't know these celebrities anymore, but I, I, I didn't know that I wouldn't know these celebrities and, like, where- what they actually do." Like, so like she was providing an example of like, oh, IShowSpeed. Like, if you were to, like, ask a kid, "Who's IShowSpeed?" "Oh, it's the popular Twitch streamer."
Yeah, I don't know who that is.
But then the, like, if you, yeah, go to you, and it's just like, "Who's that guy? What, what, what's he in?"
How do I ... [laughs] What's this twitching kids are up to?
Right.
Twitching doesn't sound very healthy to me.
I feel so old.
If you're twitching, you've got, you know, neurological issues.
Right, he's live on Kick. Who's he kicking?
[laughs]
I feel old for, uh, going on Z103 and, or a- going, doing imaging for Z103 and asking Maddy with, with help for, with Gen Z slang, Gen A slang.
Yeah. Well, at least you're not jumping on air like some of those Top 40 hosts and being like, "Oh, that Olivia Rodrigo." [laughs]
I just sent a, uh-
And you're, like, 60 years old
I, I-
It's like, stop it, you old creep
... I did just send, uh, Josh Tyler an article that said, "Spider Harrison has retired after 54 years in radio."
[laughs] Oh my God. Spider-
Spider Harrison is done. And he was one of those dudes, "Hi, I'm Spider Harrison, and I'm gonna play some of the hot stuff from Olivia Rodrigo."
[laughs]
And he's been around for so long.
Oh.
And, and so the, Josh's one-word response was, "Good."
[laughs]
"To Spider Harrison retires." [upbeat music]
The noon hour of Madness and Mayhem is a production of Riverbend Media Group. For more information or to contact the show, visit riverbendmediagroup.com.
[upbeat music]