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The Infinite Game Podcast exists to capture yesterday's and today's wisdom to help us all play life at a higher level. With topics of mental health, spiritual health, and physical health being the focus for pursuing mastery in the game that matters the most: life. There will be two styles of shows, one, with Henry and Harrison talking, the other, hosting guests to glean insights from them!
The Infinite Game is a project that believes the expansion of our capacity and the shouldering of personal responsibility is the key to changing culture.
almost halfway through the summer, Henry, how are we doing? We're back. Most hand
we've ever been. Hair is the blondest it's ever been. And I feel like we're
taking steps in awareness, which then leads to you feeling like it's more
challenging than ever. Because at the beginning of something, you're almost
starting with a level of ignorance that allows you just to like walk into the
unknown. But now, after every summer, we learn more about what it takes. We have
clear goals and expectations for ourselves, for the players, even
externally, all the other things we're building, we're seeing what's possible. So
then there's almost just this daily angst for progress, because you know how
important progress is when you see what needs to be done. Yeah, June was max
capacity. I mean, we haven't been on for a long time. It wasn't because just
abandoning the podcast. It was purely because from 4 a.m. to 1030 p.m. every
single day. It's been nonstop. But I think we've said to each other every single day,
we need to record podcasts. We need to record podcasts. But it just, we have too
much that needs to be done. And I wasn't saying we are a master class in
leadership. Wasn't going far that far. Didn't mean any hubris there. But June
has been absolute. So many lessons in leadership. What it takes, Henry and I,
from 8 until 12, some days 8 until 1 p.m. have about on a really light day, 70
people on a usual day, 115 to 120. And it ranges from college players, very elite
college players to like a sixth grader or a fifth grader who's just starting to
learn. And there's some days where Henry and I, it's Henry I, one other coach, two
coaches when we're lucky. We've had two coaches now. They're great. Yeah, Reuben
BT has been have been awesome. But that first two, three weeks in the summer when
you're laying the law down, and that's why my insights today, all about
discipline, all about discipline. You know, as a leader, you absolutely have to be
the bad guy for probably one to two to three weeks and just just cracking the
whip because the standard cannot slip. It is a never-ending war against
mediocrity. And when people come almost from the external world into something
that's been protected and established, fought for, fortified. It is a yeah. I
mean June was max capacity. I think every day there are multiple things. There's a
lot of things we'll dive into. But when you're around people as consistently as
we are, I said it on Tuesday at practice and I think it's a great thing to bring
up to people, which is that inner awareness of your body and your mind are
gonna draw you into doing things that are you know are bad for you to do.
Meaning you you should wake up and go to the gym. You should spend some time in
silence to find peace. You should eat that extra meal for more carbs when your
body's been overworked. You should hydrate at times where you don't want
water. But your your mind will for some reason plant seeds of things that you
knowingly know are not good for you. And when you have a bunch of people that the
drift to mediocrity almost turns into a collective thing and they're just
constantly oh are we doing this drill that's kind of hard. Man you're asking us
to be decently mature and act in a way that isn't our best interest. It's crazy.
It's a constant. You're not there to serve yourself though. I mean serving
yourself is only wanting popularity for popularity's sake. We're not there to be
popular. We're there to execute and see an ideal happen. There's this
line from Emerson and you probably remember reading this page but it's
instantly we know whose words are loaded with life and whose are not. And we could
not lead or be around this many people if we were not as real as possible. Yeah. If
we didn't work as hard as we have in the past or have done these things we're
trying to make them do people would see completely through it right away. No
absolutely. Especially on the Emerson line there are people who are able to
speak from experience or just from reading. I'm reading Ian McGillcrest right
now. He has this hemispheric not hypothesis on how the brain reflects reality. How we
kind of shift things from our right hemisphere over to our left make them
explicit and then bring them back to our right to kind of reintegrate it into our
entire lives. But yeah it's kind of what you're talking about there where you
intuit something you kind of walk into the unknown then one part of you needs
to make it super explicit super clear and that's something I'm going to talk
about today. I'm coming from GK Chesterton. I've been fighting as hard as
I can to keep my study windows clear clean still established in this schedule
that we have and I still read GK Chesterton Maharaji reading Ian McGillcrest
and then Emerson. Those are kind of my four guys that continue to study right
now and you see this back and forth between super explicit very clear
discipline but then the almost wordless action that has to happen the courage
that can't be described has to just be embodied that then can be then read not
so but not so much interpreted but shared. One thing I will say last not so
much common on the summer we'll be unpacking it non-stop because we're still
in it but there's this great line that only he was touched freedom can make it
it's analog can make a derivative of it like you cannot lead people to places
that you've never gone say it all the time guys we're never gonna have you do
something that we've never done I will never have you do something that if
you were to ask me hey hop in right now run this with us do this workout with us
like Roger I'll do it right now I'd love to I'd actually rather be on the line
with you than just like standing over here with a camera in my hand yeah
sipping cold brew like I loved being back then and competing that's why it's
so easy for us to be a leader you're basically ushering people in the
footsteps that you've established or you're at least showing them how to
create their own now that's the great part we have some players absolutely
just trailblazing their own path definitely I think from our inspiration
but you're still there you're still teaching a derivative form of something
you're very familiar with absolutely and there is this we jokingly share
something and we call it our old friend like the morning is our old friend we
revisit it welcome pain and like an old yeah and like you invited him in the
pain the suffering is your old friend there's a familiarity there that you have
chosen by awareness yeah and there is that awareness that can only be achieved
through action like you're aware of the things you choose to do every single day
yeah and these kids to get familiar with the level of standard we want the
repetition of choice that has to happen every day is not normal like it needs
insane aggressive leadership and Harrison I have been more aggressive is
not like the perfect word but it's it's pretty aggressive ranked up to a level
that I don't even remember even being close to in the past no I know I lose
sometimes thinking I'm a really not so much I'm the bad guy but we're the
leaders and we're the leaders in an outsized not so much outsized population
but one would say like think about a private school it's like hey you've got
good teacher to kid ratio well here if you've got to be a general an absolute
general and comments have to be flying at a pace where it is there's no sign
of very little silence everybody's getting a comment every single rep if
anybody's messing off they're gonna hear about it but if they are not ready to be
engaged and you go now let them drift let them drift you either stay in the
pace of the river and keep going or it's tough the environment needs to be so high
level that anyone not mirroring what others are doing should feel out of place
yeah let me say this GK Chester it fits perfectly here and this is for insights
all about discipline I mean it is incredible discipline discipline is
freedom is still probably one of the truest lines ever you have to impose
some sort of order some sort of structure you know think about you
project we'll have an episode specifically about how far that app has
come a few days ago it was the seven months of I've been working on it every
single day for as long as I can put towards it I mean sometimes it's
literally every working hour I have at building that app and at seven months it
is I mean how much better is it than you thought it ever could be that's it's
it's incredible it is a platform for me personally that has been great but we've
kind of woven in this social aspect think Strava but for Olympic athletes for
athletes now we'll have a health monitor integration Garmin Coros those will be
able to go over so basically be like Strava but it's it's not that kind of
free social media aspect it is the opportunity to support and be supported
in the pursuit of excellence you know at any time you can be kicked off it's not
some free platform these are for elite athletes in the communities that build
them a platform that underpins that pursuit but primarily it gives order
that affords flourishing it's kind of like this thesis that we have across all
of our businesses everything that I'm doing everything that we're doing order
that affords human flourishing you have to impose order on your life clear aim
compelling vision take intentional action allocate times allocate time to
the things that matter that's literally what the app does that is what we say
have a clear aim establish a compelling vision take intentional action and
allocate time to the things that matter and I think the one idea that we've been
telling the players so consistently this summer is let lacrosse be the
gravitational force you and your you have some sort of organizing principle
yes something has to be the ideal and there's no shame harm there is no harm
that's gonna come from for a couple months just let it be lacrosse let it
organize everything in your life yeah I always hated the line by parents where
they kind of say to our parents oh are you sad that they didn't have a
childhood or they missed out on this missed out on that you didn't go to a
family vacation for seven years but we had what that your kid didn't we got to
do what other people didn't our parents have custom UNC sweatshirts their
sacrifices are always worth it for a clear aim and a compelling vision
something you generally want now here's here's GK Chesterton though this is
awesome goes right into what we're talking about you with you you project
establishing a discipline discipline structure onto a community so he writes
there are some who would argue that we should have no absolutes that evolution
tends to rub out absolute lines I say we must have definite lines but it's not
because definite lines are the things which restrain humanity is because
definite lines are the things which distinguish humanity our black lines are
not the bars of the Tigers cage there are the stripes of the Tigers skin they're
what make him a tiger now that yeah then these points continue to build up no I
let me let me add one more to this so he continues on about the importance of
discipline rules things that you would bulk against and you go whoa why why
sometimes it's because I said so God has said so okay there's lower parts of our
nature that like Henry said earlier in the episode there it's gonna crave to do
things that are not good for us they're not good for you reaching for the phone
reaching for sweets reaching for whatever it is before practice asking
for an easy practice I know it's not good for you yeah two days ago I threw
these this group of players on a drill that I knew would be miserable and
they're gonna do it for a long time and I was like you came in unfocused and you
came in expecting a light day and it pissed me off and now you have that for
30 minutes yeah and so stop showing up like you think this is gonna be easy yeah
because you have no idea if you have a big dream big goal from where you are you
I used to love to watch the Tour de France it's what's called losing the
wheel you can lose the wheel of the head group the pace group so fast never catch
up if you slip you'll never catch up so that concept of you can't lose the pace
wheel you cannot fall off the wheel and so it takes that discipline now here you
continues our need for rules does not arise from the smallness of our intellect
but from the greatness of our task discipline is not necessary for things
that are slow and safe but discipline is necessary for things that are swift and
dangerous we do not need a map for a stroll but we do need a map for a raid
we cannot be vague about what we believe in what we are willing to fight for and
to die for there are 20 ways to criticize a battle but only one way to
win it and then he continues again yes incredible incredible lines yeah and he
goes I now realize that we are trying to fight the whole world yeah to turn the
tide of the whole time we live in to resist everything that seems irresistible
the one perfectly divine thing he says the one glimpse of God's paradise on
earth is to fight a losing battle and not lose it that's why I love that so
awesome I mean and that's kind of what I feel daily early on in June we're
showing up fighting I'm contemplating kicking people out non-stop I'm like get
these kids out of here they're not ready to be here they're too young they're
this they're that I'm having to be just swearing like a sailor at kids waiting
to get a text from a parent like you got to stop saying that and me then text
and be like you don't understand I do have to say and if you've ever had to do
not even do what we do but if you it there's this great Goggins monologue
where he goes you don't understand why I swear I can't just say it was hard yeah
when we were building ourselves into the Carolina players I can't just say yeah I
went I went hard and so when we're laying this out for for players there's a
point in which yeah you got to drive some things home yeah hard way harder
than just regular non that holds I mean that whole part is about clear ideals
and I've loved what I've been reading recently which is the American
historical documents and these dudes the nobles set the standards and when they
were building the Bostonian culture the Massachusetts culture the New York
culture they were literally making laws for morality they weren't even letting
in place like the plays exist the arts because it led to the degradation
degradation of culture like there were certain things they were outlawing as
even being illegal and so explicitly what that was in the human behavior that
went with it and you can't even imagine that placed on our society right now
which is how ridiculous everything is but back then when they were trying to
create build something that had never existed before a brand new country and
in places that flourished the clarity to how they thought people needed to behave
and what culture looked like was unbelievable yeah it was incredible yeah
very clear ideals with ruthless standards very hard rules and that's why
I love having multiple goals that are nested but that are creating a tighter
and tighter and tighter yeah in computer science I think they call it like the
search space it's just a super tight search base there's this great podcast I
listened to a long time ago of this guy who he was the sports psych for a bunch
of Olympians and he'd say you know some of these Olympians when they start to
get wealthy they can be like I can do whatever I want now you look at him be
like no you can't you cannot do whatever you want yeah there's actually one or two
paths that daily you can take to make sure that your body is operating on the
highest level possible for you to maintain the direction orientation and
then yeah I've loved thinking order to achieve it I've loved thinking about every
brand culture of community mission we're trying to build as a just a derivative
of the highest example of that yeah everything's everything's a sort of
central or highest principle and you cannot encounter what you're trying to
make a derivative of either through action study experience so I mean we
think a lot I gotta experience it Harrison didn't when my short time at
West Point I mean I was legitimately changed from being there and it wasn't
even a long time just walking around West Point was unbelievable and there's
little parts of the Academy that there's like a longing for it to be a derivative
function of a West Point like culture with clean and crisp uniforms people
that move from one one place to another with like purpose yeah knows what
they're going to in the next task and is showing up with intent to do it as well
as possible yeah no discipline is incredibly admirable yeah I mean it
doesn't get much better than someone who has laid just layer after layer after
layer yeah and you could see the just texture and their character when they
fought for because yes you need of course the ideal but it can't just be in
your imagination it's not something it's not a hallucination you can't be
delusional now you have to be walking that line because you to degree are a
little delusional you're imposing a fiction on a reality that does not exist
yet yes but also reality I mean it takes a ridiculous amount of energy so
much persistence I mean the classic man who just hammers on a stone and he's
hammered 50 times 70 times a hundred times 200 times gets up to like the 900
time and it cracks on the 900 and one and it wasn't that blows every single
one before majority people there they're quitting at 40 they're quitting at a 200
we had a I had to talk today at lunch one of our friends was over and I kind
of made this statement I don't think everybody can be an entrepreneur I would
almost put my flag down on that as we're in this pursuit I drove home and almost
posted on my story enjoy the nine to five simple easy check yeah I'm telling
you there's something nice to that close your laps close your laptop at five you
got no more responsibility go watch your TV yeah we it's every hour at 941 p.m. I
mean it's every hour of the day I guarantee you after this I go to my
computer and finish the the builds that have been going on get the updates out
it is it's not for everyone and even then someone will rebuttal but everyone
could that word could is disgusting no it's it's not disgusting it's just the
reality of life most people oh they could be great their whole life that was
like the original you project thesis hey all coaches say to their players you
could be great yeah but you could be great your whole entire life not many
people are willing to go through the pain the regiment the practice the
awareness of your weaknesses that's just staring at what your weaknesses absolutely
and that was I've said this to a number of players this summer of hey your your
biggest thing holding you back is that you think you should be perfect and
you're not just attacking attacking the problem you're like wincing away from it
the problem is no big deal if it's faced if something is just confronted it is way
more insignificant but actually especially if you throw volume at it yes
if you're like this doesn't have to be perfect tomorrow no in fact it doesn't
have to be perfect for a number of months I'm going to hammer at it though
yeah every single day and there will be every day and that's the great thing the
one question I kind of asked myself obviously outside of like night prayer
and examine of conscience and some sort of laying out the vision for tomorrow
I'll always ask myself did I sincerely pursue my goals today now I'll only be
able to ask myself that if I have enough energy before bed sometimes I'll
literally just like collapse into bed and I will not have a good evening
routine but when I do have the energy to kind of wrap that day up nicely it's
generally you just have to ask did I sincerely pursue did I not achieve my
outcome goals but did I achieve my process goals yeah and that's what I'm
still tweaking and trying to figure out the you project app how those process
goals and incentives are established how you find the feedback loop well even I
was gonna say even if we have to incentivize it in some sort of prize
reward you know I had some iteration of the app where you established your
outcome goals and then the kind of AI agent within the app noticed when you
logged something and then intelligently messaged you and say hey let's establish
this as a three-day goal let's make sure to keep this streak alive for three more
days let's log five more minutes now if you're doing two hours of wobble it's
not gonna ask you do two hours and five minutes I mean there's an intelligent
layer to the app which is which is powerful but even that I wasn't I
didn't really love also to it kind of slowed the app down a bit but how do
incentivize those process goals to make it to where you someone fights for a
standard fights for the their process that's tough the process doesn't need to
be glorious or it doesn't need to be perfect at all times I was explaining to
players what my morning looked like yesterday when getting to the gym for me
in the morning does not always look the same yesterday I literally alarm went
off 345 I stopped it laid back down in bed 4 o'clock woke up moved to the couch
10 minutes of sitting upright on the couch sleeping 10-minute alarm went off
went down to the ground child's pose on the ground till 425 popped up almond
butter coffee out the door like that's not a perfect morning but it's just
you're committed to this this process of just like doing yeah sometimes you have
to put a touch point your day meaning like a hard stop got to be there have to
be at the gym have to be there stuff doesn't need to be perfect but I have to
wake up and do the thing maybe that's a tough entrepreneur life though where if
you go you know what I got to get my computer tomorrow at 5 a.m. you're like
I guess I don't have to because I could just work literally all day yeah but that
is the nice thing about if you are trying to get if you need to get your
life back on track which I'm gonna make the assumption if you're listening to
this you're probably kind of on track but if you needed to you just make
yourself get somewhere in the morning and you have to be there so it kind of
washes the demand to do some sort of Tony Robbins hour of power 30th thrive
15 minutes to fulfillment some of those like nice morning routines that do get
you primed I mean the thing about hand waving away priming visualization
meditation prayer yeah I'm praying stuff is maximally important especially for
you know I love the line we're being informed by where we think we're going
you have to have a vision that vision matters there's something to the
observer effect and and vision boards you know vision boards wouldn't be a
thing if they didn't work like I have the classic story that I have the truck I
have currently it was my first dream car had as my background for about four or
five months in college I switched the background but then when we go look for
trucks we show up at the dealership and they had a decent selection but nothing
that I really wanted and the guys like dude this truck just got here yesterday
we haven't had a trail boss on the lot for months they usually just kept
purchased online showed it to me as they get exact truck on my wallpaper and you
go well okay would that have happened without it being on my wallpaper was it
the wallpaper you're like no no no I mean it wasn't the wallpaper but there's
something to it right there's something to having a vision clear aim compelling
vision then you take intentional action now at that time it gets down to
sincerely wanting something yeah wanting something clear you know it can't be like
I just want a house so that might be a shack you know like can you describe the
square footage where is it gonna be you know well on the business side of things
it has to be something and I this has been a major paradigm shift for me which
Elon said don't be obsessed with building a great product but you have to
build something useful like it just has to be genuinely useful has to impact and
this is how I've broken down useful is you're impacting the way someone directs
their time and attention whilst pursuing a goal that matters that's kind of my
obsession right now with you project then was Sanctus the wearable which is
that's something that's useful can you impact someone the way someone directs
their time and attention while in pursuit of a real goal something that
matters to them and as it aids them in that pursuit then you have it like that
that that's never going away you know I think we're not getting into AI it's a
little late but yeah we'll see if AI pans out in the way that people says it
says it's going to I mean it's going to be incredibly intelligent and it's gonna
be a tool for for people who have the like application it's a high IQ tool it's
not it's not even high IQ it's like specific domain if not you're just
abdicating your thought you know you're just literally having it do what you do
you're not like orchestrating massive work place you yeah and so unless you're
giving it the rocket fuel to take you to the next level yeah and there's nothing
showing that there's gonna be just some massive adoption to people outsourced
you have an intelligent by now I don't know yeah hopefully people get to keep
getting scared to do it so it's one of those things that human beings will
always be in pursuit of a better vision like a better future yeah if you can
impact that you have something good now also you could be an engineer and make a
bunch of hardware stuff but that's not us yeah that's not but discipline just
to get back to that point about people look at and this is a great reframe
because this is how I think this has been our superpower maybe it's the last
thing I'll say which is we were able I know I was able but I know you were too
but I'll say from first person I was able to love things that people hate it
or to embrace things that people shied away from yeah that's why I say to the
players you've got to usher in pain like it's an old friend wave it in invite it
in and you cannot flinch from it and it's not it's not pain from a masochistic
sense sense it's pain from a like I'm forcing adaptation I'm breaking and
burning weakness off as I march towards what I want it has to happen it has to
happen and that's what this GK Chesterton line is awesome because there
are people that think discipline is the bars of the prison it's not it is the
stripes of the lion it is what makes the tiger the tiger strikes of the tiger
yeah at the line but you get the point you know I posted a video of me doing
wall ball yesterday and if I had more time in the day I would do more wall
ball I love it it's so fun you know I had I did like two minutes the other day
like it was just a cold glass of waters refreshing yeah I mean I did two three
minutes but it was one of those things that there's lacrosse players that to
ask them to do wall ball is like asking can I pull out one of your teeth right
in front of you like so it's like some it's some ridiculous ask you know and
if you're a soccer player to footwork if it's a field hockey player to stick work
it's everyone has that foundational input if you can love that foundational
input you are unstoppable you're going to be great and it's figuring out what
that what is that for you you know I now look at it almost for me as the reading
the personal practices how I'm operating basically from Sun up to Sun down every
single little piece of my life is now kind of that operational input one of my
favorite little parts that Emerson writes about which is just what a man is
the man is across all sectors just the premier the engineer that is the
greatest engineer that's a man I know the cook the best cook the one that takes
pride in everything he makes that's a man and I look at across all athletes if
you are someone who loves what you do you're doing it to the highest form
possible you're taking care of your body physically you're the strongest you can
be you're endeavoring and trainer training and growing in skills you're a
man yeah or you're a woman you're the highest you're what it should be when
people don't adopt all the lifestyle of what they're doing I'm like you are
nothing you aren't reflecting anything yeah and it's it's encouraging what we
are seeing this summer it is encouraging how possible it is because we have some
unbelievable players yeah and people I mean we have some leaders and leaders
the young kids who initially I wanted to kick out I mean they there they stuffed
up a little bit I have self a lot yeah force and adaptation it works and I do
I've always envisioned one day being and on a podcast someone asking you know what
do you what do you hope to be or be known for some sort of iteration of that
question and I always wish there would be an answer as simple as a great man
yeah just a great is that not a man yeah just a man is that not enough let me be
a man I would consider some people just you like they're not definition is clear
you're it's so you have a man you have us and the live stream biological male or man
like that I want to be man the definition of those can be different and
I've always liked that line I don't know when I wrote it but it's to be a great
man is that not enough and obviously apply that to women apply that to to any
area but you can get to that point where like no just being great not at that but
just being great in general is that not enough because from there then you can
make everything a derivative of it mm-hmm until you're that you can't you
can't so yeah anything else I think it was pretty solid I mean it's you know
half an hour in the future talk about a beating Colin cursed and yeah the time
with him there's I mean there's so many all the tournaments we've been to
already yeah people we've talked to there's there's a lot to share so we'll
continue this more consistently yep well I don't really have sign-off music now
should I hit the sign-off music or let's just tell him to get after it yeah God
bless my friend we're praying for you please pray for us and no wool see you
next time