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A space to settle in and listen, and see where the episode takes you. This inspiring, reflective podcast is an invitation to travel deeper, with compassionate self-enquiry.
Henny shares insights from her own life, alongside practices that help us connect with our inner wisdom, explore our relationship with change and find a greater sense of flow. Henny believes we all hold our own answers, so there are no one-size-fits-all solutions here. This is a space to be with what’s true for you, and to grow from there.
If you’re drawn to slowing down, listening in, and exploring what it means to live with greater authenticity, this podcast is for you. Guided by psychology, mindfulness, therapeutic coaching, flow journaling, and everyday compassion, we explore ideas that help us step further into our inner worlds, in order to shape the changes we seek in our outer worlds.
A little while ago, maybe in the last season or the one before that, I did a series of episodes that were all about examining some of these phrases that we carry with us, some of these truisms or aphorisms or common sayings and the meaning that they can hold for us. So things like the show must go on, there's always pride before a fall, don't get too big for your boots. Welcome to the Henny Flynn podcast, the space for deepening self awareness with profound self compassion. I'm Henny. I write, coach and speak about how exploring our inner world can transform how we experience our outer world, all founded on a bedrock of self love.
Henny Flynn:Settle in and listen and see where the episode takes you. So I've just been thinking about this. I'm lying, well I'm actually now sitting on the sofa in our retreat house, our little cabin that we have here for clients to come and stay in or guests to come and stay in in order to have a time of deep rest and deep relaxation here at our home. Every now and again Anton and I will come and stay here and we're doing that this weekend. It's a long weekend in England and in Britain and we're spending that long weekend staying in our own retreat house and the weather is spectacular, the sun is shining.
Henny Flynn:The sky is blue and the birds are singing and it all feels very beautiful. And I realised yesterday that I had completely forgotten to do this week's episode of the podcast and I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry if it's something that you, you know, really love to listen to at a particular time maybe, you know, on a Saturday morning or you know during the Sunday it's now Sunday evening and because we had things planned and I wasn't able to get the podcast done in time before it to hit its usual schedule and so I chose to let that go. I chose to not get caught up in the story of you know I've made a commitment. I say that I'm going to produce the podcast each week and you know if I'm able to do so I really should do that because that's part of how we you know honour our commitments And all of that is true of course.
Henny Flynn:You know ordinarily I I do show up and and if you've been listening to the podcast for the last few weeks you'll know that you know a couple of episodes I've actually recorded from hospital where I've been sitting with a a loved one who's been very unwell. And you know and even in those those times it's like I've shown up. I've I've delivered the podcast. And and like I say you know for some reason this weekend it just just slipped my mind. I don't think it's ever happened before and I'm curious about it I suspect it's because my body is and my mind has been really needing to deeply rest and to reset because of the stuff that I've been dealing with in my personal life over the last few weeks.
Henny Flynn:And so, you know, I'm trusting that, you know, that's absolutely okay. And also then I was sort of lying here just thinking about that phrase the show must go on and really what I'd love to talk about is the fact that the show doesn't always have to go on. You know if that's one of the stories that you're carrying, it's definitely one of my stories that I'm carrying from my formative years then I think it can be really interesting to explore what it means to us either to to insist you know no matter what the circumstances are to absolutely insist that the show must go on And also what the flip of that could mean, you know, what's the resistance to the idea that the show doesn't always have to go on? And or and or what's the what might be the fear about what might happen if the show doesn't go on if we don't continue to do the thing that we've said we were going to do and I think there's obviously real nuance here because so often you know these commitments you know these when we've promised to do something, when we have a strong sense of duty, when we're caring for another person or other people, when things of importance are relying on us, you know, of course then it's, you know, it's important that we do as humans, you know, behave in a reliable way.
Henny Flynn:So we're not letting people down. And then there's the kind of nuance starts to be where have we created rules that actually are within us? Where have we started to fabricate a story about our identity or how we show up in the world or what other people might think about us if we don't follow through on, you know, something that we've said we're going to do. And so, how do we find our way from committing to such an extent that we hit a point of burnout, potentially, where we end up overextending ourselves, where we we we put everybody else's needs so far above our own that actually it's to the detriment of our own well-being emotional, physical, psychological well-being. And then sort of understanding well how might it be if we begin to sort of play at the edges of some of these stories or these beliefs that we might hold.
Henny Flynn:So staying very specifically with the show must go on, how might it be to just really gently ask the question, well what's the worst that could happen if I don't step forward? So in the case of you know doing the podcast definitely in the past I would have been would have been in agony about not having shown up. I would have felt that I was not only letting you know you down, that I was in some way kind of letting down a story that I held about myself, about you know myself being someone who was always totally and utterly reliable. And I think also it goes much deeper as well, it goes into the place of identity. And I'm interested, I'm curious how, you know, now the adult sort of, you know, woman that I am and with the, you know, the sort of the work that I've done on getting to know myself and getting to understand the stories that I hold, why actually now it feels okay and also kind of trusting that it feels okay for you too to listen to this and I'm really curious you know how does this land with you?
Henny Flynn:Do you hold a story that you must always show up no matter the cost? Or are you able to be discerning in the moment of when you're making commitments? Are you able to say actually this is okay for me but this isn't? Or are you someone who or have you found you know sort of there have been times in your life maybe as you've sort of got to know yourself better where you're able to at times say actually actually it isn't okay for me to to do this thing even though I've said that I would and and I also like even as I'm I'm saying this I kind of feel like oh my god there's so much well there can be you know some feelings of shame and guilt and and I'm even feeling sort of in myself like is it okay for me to talk about this so you know these stories these beliefs they run really deep and and I say again you know of course this isn't about just abandoning people this isn't about being so unreliable that you never show up or that or that you know someone else's needs never matter.
Henny Flynn:This is about how do we find that balance and I think that's a know I think it's a really interesting question and sometimes for me when we find something which actually, you know, creating the podcast that's it's something that I've deliberately turned into a playground for myself and I've talked about this before on here that I allow myself to sort of press into the edges of what feels okay for me, to be really vulnerable, to to try out thoughts and ideas and to trust that they're going to be received in the way that, you know, that they're intended and to know that I will still be okay if for whatever reason they're not and I think that's also a kind of big part of this work of you know how do we practice this art of discernment where we're able to be in the world with profound compassion and be with ourselves with compassion too so and then here I am on Sunday evening rather than you know Friday when I would ordinarily record it And I'm calm and this feels really interesting. I'm noticing lots of different emotions going through me. This is this feels like a an interesting thing to explore and I'd really love to hear your thoughts.
Henny Flynn:And the other thing as well, for those I've had so many gorgeous messages from people wishing me well, wishing my loved one well and I just want to let you all know that we no longer have to spend every day in the hospital and that they are now home and it's an enormous relief and I'm so grateful to everyone for all of your kindness and compassion and and I just want to say thank you so much whether you wrote to me or you just had the thought or you know just thank you so much. Okay so there we go I think that's the end of today's episode and I want to send you so much love and if there's something in your life that is feeling like a commitment that's just a bit too far, like a commitment that's just asking too much of you, then maybe a question is to sit with is just to ask well what other course of action might be available to you you know there's lots of space between this and that and maybe there are some other options available for you too. Alright, sending loads and loads of love and a hug and a wave.