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Pull up a seat at our table, where badass women from all walks of life—fashion, beauty, design, music, philanthropy, art, and more—come together to share honest stories, serve truths, and dig into the realities of modern womanhood.
Johanna Almstead:
Hello everyone. I am menu planning for my next guest and she's thrown me some challenges. She is a vegetarian, so that's exciting. And she also doesn't drink alcohol. So, I've got some new recipes that I need to come up with. Can't fall back on my usuals here, guys. So, I know she loves kombucha, so I think I'm going to do a little hibiscus ginger kombucha mocktail, which I think will be delicious and gorgeous, and feels a little zingy for the night to warm us up in these cold, cold days. And then, I'm feeling a little sort of Moroccan, North African inspired for dinner. So, I'm going to start with a shepherd salad. There's a beautiful, it doesn't have any actual lettuce greens. It has just tomato, cucumber, onions, feta, some olives, and then fresh dill and a little red wine vinegarette, but not super overdressed and just salt and pepper. I love that salad. I eat it at Cafe Mocador in the city.
And then, I'm going to do a hearty, delicious vegetable tagine over couscous. I love a tagine and I love couscous. So, I'm going to do chickpeas, carrots, butternut squash, cauliflower, some raisins. And then, I'm going to top that all with some really nice slivered almonds. And I'm going to serve that with homemade pita bread, which I'm just going to crust a little bit on the outside with some herbs and some sea salt. So, it's a little yummy. And that's going to be our cozy, warm dinner.
For music, so this is a challenge, guys, because she's actually a DJ and has incredible taste in music, which makes me very insecure about my own. So, I think what I'm going to do is I'm going to start, which is kind of my go to always, is some lady, Brazilian lady crooners. I love a little bossa nova in the background, some Astrud Gilberto or whatever, Bebel Gilberto, some of those. So, I have a little bit of that playing, but I think I'm going to ask her to bring some of her vinyl. And I think she should be in charge of music for the night because I'm trying to get her back on the decks here, guys. So, my next guest is so creative, so kind, so deliberate in how she spends her time and how she lives her life, and she is an inspiration to me all the time. So, I hope that you guys are inspired by her as well and I can't wait for you to meet her. So, let's dig in.
Hello everyone and welcome to Eat My Words. My guest today is a friend and someone I admire very, very much. I'm inspired by her drive to create, her even-keel and her keen eye, as well as her discipline. She is an artist, a maker, a mother, a friend, and a wife. She spent her formative years in New York City's downtown club scene as a disc jockey, disc jockey, as a DJ, where her love of dance music and spinning vinyl set the tone for her creative life. Alongside her nights behind the turntables, she began exploring textile art, yarn bombing city streets and experimenting with improvisational quilting. Over time, her artistic practice expanded into ceramics where wheel throwing has replaced vinyl DJing. I'm saying only temporarily, hopefully we're bringing her back as her primary medium for tactile exploration and expression.
She is also an animal lover, a vegetarian, and makes a mean homemade granola that my family fights over. She is kind, she is funny, she is thoughtful, she is creative, she has amazing taste, and I am so, so very lucky to have her in my life and to call her my friend. Jolene Poyder, welcome to Eat My Words.
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, hello.
Johanna Almstead:
Hello. Welcome, welcome.
Jolene Poyder:
Thank you for having me.
Johanna Almstead:
Thank you for being here. I always like to start by telling people how we know each other because people always ask, "How do you know these amazing women?" And our origin story, I feel like is maybe one of the best that has ever happened to me in my life. So, if you don't mind, I'm going to give a little recap of how we met.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
So, I was at kind of a really intense time in my life. It was post-pandemic, but still funky in the world, it felt like. My father had died right before the pandemic hit. So, he had died in December of 2019. March of 2020 was when it all happened. So, during that time, I had received a lot of his belongings, his personal belongings right after he passed away. They were in the months to follow. And also, at the tail end of the pandemic, I had had to move my mom into a memory care unit in an assisted living facility. So, I also got her entire house of belongings, which, if you've listened to the podcast over the last couple of weeks, I've been going through a lot of those things again because I finally moved back into my house. But, anyway.
So, I was in this kind of like manic state of trying to deal with all this emotional and physical baggage. And I had the terrible idea to do a garage sale, which is so much work. If anyone has done a garage deal, it's just so much work. And I live on a dirt road. I live where no one comes. So, I am pretty sure it costs me more money to actually do the garage sale than I made. I don't even think I broke even. I'd printed signs and put them all up over town. And on the signs, I had said a few of the things that I was selling, one of which was pottery because my father actually was a potter, an amateur potter, but a huge fan of pottery and we had a ton of it. And one of our best family friends was a potter. And so, I had written that on the sign among other things. And you had seen the sign in the neighborhood and had entered it into your phone or your GPS or something, and you were going to come look at the pottery.
Well, I had my garage sale and it was a bust and I had packed everything back up. And a week later, I had just gotten everybody off to school. I think I was still in my pajamas. I was just sort of a disaster, and a white Tesla pulled into my driveway and I was like, "The only two people I know who have a white Tesla would just not show up uninvited." They would have just texted me or something. And this lovely, beautiful woman walks up to my front door and I opened the door, and your first words I think were, I think you said "Fuck," you were like, "Fuck." And I was like, "What?" And you're like, "Is there a garage sale going on or maybe it's inside?" And I was like, "Oh, there was a garage sale, but it was last week. We are done now and everything's inside."
And you were so funny and you were like, "Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I'm so... Oh, I'm such a blah, blah, blah. I didn't mean to... I put it in my phone and I was going to come and I wanted to see the pottery and da, da, da." And I, like a total weirdo, invited you in off the street and was like, "Do you want to come in and have a cup of tea and look at pottery?" I ended up dragging you down to my creepy basement and unpacking a whole crate full of weird pottery that I had had leftover from my parents, and you sat with me for like an hour. Were you like, "She's unhinged." This poor woman.
Jolene Poyder:
No, I was so excited because you were such a presence when you opened your door and I was like, "There's something that doesn't feel right as in there must not be a yard sale." But on your signs, you had just said Friday. You didn't have a date.
Johanna Almstead:
I think I said Friday, Saturday or Sunday or something. Yeah, exactly. I didn't put the date.
Jolene Poyder:
So, I came.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Whatever, Friday.
Jolene Poyder:
One week late because the signs weren't down.
Johanna Almstead:
Listen, I can't say I was... Clearly I'm not a successful garage sale host.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, but you were so welcoming and you said, "Oh, you moved here from Brooklyn? I used to live in the city and blah, blah, blah." And yeah, we spent a whole hour with each other and then I noticed you had a dog. So I said, "I have a dog. If you ever want to walk dogs, let's walk dogs together."
Johanna Almstead:
That's right. Yes, that's how it started. Yeah. Our love affair. So exciting. And then, as we became friends and we walked our dogs together, we realized that you were DJing at many of the clubs that I was dancing at in my 20s. So, we think that we've been in the same room many, many times in this lifetime together, which is very fun to think about. So, I have so many things I want to talk to you about today, including mostly your creative process and balancing creativity and motherhood and life and whatever. But I always like to start with a question of where did your journey begin? Because it's fascinating to me to hear what people say.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Well, I grew up in a really religious household where there was the church that my family attended, there was no dancing in the church, kind of-
Johanna Almstead:
Like Footloose.
Jolene Poyder:
Total Footloose. And so of course, being the girl that I am, if there's no dancing, well then that's exactly what I want to do in life.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. Of course.
Jolene Poyder:
So, I went off to college and I really wanted to be a DJ, and I met a DJ and I started dating that DJ, and then we broke up and I was worried about not having the music there. And then, a girl said to me, "Do you notice how there are no girl DJs ever, anywhere?" And I said, "Yeah, I do notice that." And I was like, "Why can't a girl be a DJ?" And so I just started.
Johanna Almstead:
Became a DJ. How did you learn?
Jolene Poyder:
I had... Because the...
Johanna Almstead:
The ex-boyfriend?
Jolene Poyder:
Yep. He had turntables at my house that he had somehow finagled me to buy, but then when we broke up, I took those turntables back, and so I just had turntables.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, you did. Yeah, you did, girl.
Jolene Poyder:
And so, I just started trying to figure it out on my own.
Johanna Almstead:
You taught yourself?
Jolene Poyder:
I taught myself. Totally self taught.
Johanna Almstead:
You teach yourself everything, don't you?
Jolene Poyder:
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So then, where were you at that time? Was that in California?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Where was it?
Jolene Poyder:
I was. I had taken time off from college to follow this boyfriend to London, and I was back in San Francisco and was teaching myself how to DJ. And then, I went back to college, which was in the middle of Missouri and they desperately needed music, people with music. So, I started my DJ career there in college.
Johanna Almstead:
You could take classes?
Jolene Poyder:
No, no, no. I just...
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, meaning just professionally DJing parties and bars and places.
Jolene Poyder:
That's right. Bars.
Johanna Almstead:
Events.
Jolene Poyder:
And that was along the lines of when raves were happening. So, Missouri really wanted raves. And so, we would do raves in this old, not church, but a big music venue place called The Blue Note.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. And were you the only DJ for the night or was it like a bunch of DJs?
Jolene Poyder:
Weirdly, the only other DJ, she played techno, it was a girl as well. So, it was really odd that both of us were girls and we both did.
Johanna Almstead:
So, that's interesting that Missouri was pioneering girl DJs.
Jolene Poyder:
I know. It's super odd. It was really, really odd. And yeah, so she and I would throw these raves. And then from there, I moved back to San Francisco after college. And then probably like a year later, I moved to New York City.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. And what made you move to New York?
Jolene Poyder:
Because the music scene was so cool here that I really wanted to dive deep into the music scene here.
Johanna Almstead:
And what year was this?
Jolene Poyder:
When did I move to New York? '95.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, it was. Oh my God, it was so fun. Okay. So, you moved to New York and how did you go about making life for yourself? In San Francisco, you were like making money as a DJ. You were like already...
Jolene Poyder:
No, no, no, no, no, no. I was temping.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Jolene Poyder:
Let's be clear, I just finished college. I was temping and I would DJ a little bit on the side, but not too much.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Jolene Poyder:
And then, I moved to New York and I was desperate to find a job because everything's so expensive. So, I found myself in fashion. I worked at the J.Crew catalog at the corporate office.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my God, I always forget this about you.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes, you did. And I was desperate to be a DJ, but how was I going to support myself being a DJ?
Johanna Almstead:
So, fashion and DJing is your life. I love that.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes. So, fashion was my life for a little bit, but then I started getting to the point where I was like, if I don't DJ now, I'm never going to DJ. Fashion's just going to take me away. And so, I quit my fashion job and went around to all the bars and gave them a, I mean, this is so long ago, gave them a cassette tape of my mix.
Johanna Almstead:
A demo.
Jolene Poyder:
Yep. And there was this one woman that took pity on me. She owned Starlight and Wonder Bar, which were both gay bars.
Johanna Almstead:
Which were so fun.
Jolene Poyder:
And she was doing a girl's night on Sunday night at Starlight, and she had a girl DJ but she just wanted to try me out, and I ended up taking the night. Which was kind of cool because she already had a huge following and so all I had to do was just go in and play music. And she was so supportive.
Johanna Almstead:
That's amazing.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. And then from there, because you have one DJ gig, then it's easy to get other DJ gigs. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
So, you were like a creature of the night.
Jolene Poyder:
I was definitely a creature of the night. I worked three or four nights a week, and in New York City, you worked till 4:00 AM. And I just got done reading Mark Ronson's book Night People, and it reminded me of all the things that we would have to do. The fact that I was a girl out on the street at 4:00 AM trying to catch a cab with all these records, and if someone steals your records, you're screwed because that's all you got.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. Right.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. But a lot of times when I'd meet new people, they wouldn't believe that I was a DJ, A, because I was a girl, and B, I don't know. It wasn't a thing.
Johanna Almstead:
Didn't feel like a real thing, a real job, like a real career.
Jolene Poyder:
No, definitely not that, but also no one knew that there were girls doing it because you had to lug your records at that point. There was no MP3s or-
Johanna Almstead:
Little thumb drive.
Jolene Poyder:
... Like, "Here's my music." No. I mean, people can just show up at a club and have a thumb drive and that's all they need now. But back then, we were lugging our records.
Johanna Almstead:
Your actual vinyl records.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. And if you didn't bring it on the night, you didn't play it.
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Jolene Poyder:
You had to actually preset your-
Johanna Almstead:
You had preset your whole set, right?
Jolene Poyder:
... Yes. If the night wasn't how you imagined, you still had to play the records that you brought.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. Oh, so if the vibe is totally off, you're screwed.
Jolene Poyder:
Or if everyone likes hip hop and you only have house, you got to play your house.
Johanna Almstead:
And see what happens. Boo. Do people just stop dancing and leave?
Jolene Poyder:
No, because usually I would have a pretty good idea of what was happening. And there was a lot of collaboration, you start knowing other DJs that you like to DJ with, and so then the pack of you would go try and find a DJ gig kind of thing.
Johanna Almstead:
So fun.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. It was lots and lots of fun.
Johanna Almstead:
Did you, as a kid, have an idea of what you wanted your life to look like when you were older? Did you have-
Jolene Poyder:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
... No.
Jolene Poyder:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
In that religious household?
Jolene Poyder:
No. The weird thing is that my mom had all these 45s and I used to stack them on a record player, and I loved watching the movement of a record player. And those were not religious. Those were from her pre-religious, Elvis and that kind of stuff.
Johanna Almstead:
And did you know back then that you were an artist? Did you know you were a creative soul when you were a kid?
Jolene Poyder:
No, not at all. But my mother rewarded me for making things.
Johanna Almstead:
She did.
Jolene Poyder:
That's when I would get the...
Johanna Almstead:
Interesting.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
And oh, we're going to get into this, aren't we? No, I think it's really interesting because I always, as a mother of daughters, one of whom is wildly creative and really needs to express herself through artistic endeavors, I think about it and I worry a lot about it, about making sure she knows that she is an artist and that she can be an artist and that that's a viable life for her. So, I would ask that question because it wasn't in my household as creative as my parents both were very creative people. In fact, I was recently going through a bunch of stuff and I looked at my husband and I was like, "God, my mom was such an artist."
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, that's so cool.
Johanna Almstead:
It wasn't an option as a profession, to be...
Jolene Poyder:
It wasn't rewarded as a... Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
No, the arts and music and writing and those things were all very, very important, but it was more about being a rounded out individual as opposed to being an artist, which I thought was interesting.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So, you're DJing in New York. What happens next?
Jolene Poyder:
I really want to be a mom, but I really don't want to give up DJing.
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Jolene Poyder:
And I kind of know that those two things can't, at least for me, they can't go together, working all night and then having a baby.
Johanna Almstead:
So, had you met your husband by this point?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. And I put it off for so long, the kid thing.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, because it was hard. It's funny. I mean, DJing is at least, I think, a more obvious one of like, it's going to be harder. But I mean, I guess there's like-
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, there are people that do it.
Johanna Almstead:
... There's probably emergencies room doctors who work overnight also, right? They could probably keep the same hours. So, I think it's we all know, and I don't think we know how much or how intensely our lives are going to change, but it's like, you know the jig is up when the babies come.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Especially because I'm thinking back then, a lot of the reason why you might get hired as a female DJ is your looks and everything.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. So, a nine-month pregnant woman on the turntables is not the vibe?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. I did DJ until I was six months pregnant and then I just had to stop because I was carrying twins and I was massive.
Johanna Almstead:
Wow. Okay. Som you have your twins, you DJ'd until you were six months pregnant and then did you literally not DJ again once they came?
Jolene Poyder:
I didn't DJ again. Right before I got pregnant, my husband was doing startups so I needed to make some money so I got back into fashion. So, when I had the kids, I went back part-time into fashion for a little bit. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Got it.
Jolene Poyder:
Yep.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So, you've given up this thing that feels so-
Jolene Poyder:
My favorite thing in the world. Yep.
Johanna Almstead:
... Your favorite thing in the world to do for, I think probably maybe your second favorite thing to do was being a mom. I don't know actually. I don't know if I would say that that's my favorite thing either. But so, you became a double mother very quickly.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes, yes.
Johanna Almstead:
You had twin boys right out of the gate. So, what was that transition like and what did it feel like to give something up and then have these double babies?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Well, it's interesting because when I was really little, a baby DJ, I remember saying like, "Oh, those old guys that come and do these, so sad, they're 35 and they're doing these things." And then, I found myself at that age having babies. So, it kind of felt right timing-wise. And I also was running the largest house music channel internet radio station at the time. So, I had to give that up too. I thought I could hold onto that, but there was no way, with double babies.
Johanna Almstead:
Double babies and-
Jolene Poyder:
Nothing happened.
Johanna Almstead:
... No help? No help at all? That's a big, I call it a creative and emotional whiplash. It's like becoming a mother I think is emotional whiplash for most people anyway. Becoming a mother of twins, I can only imagine is also quite jarring. And then, also knowing that you're kind of giving up this thing that you love and that fuels your soul in a way that many other things do not.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
That's hard.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
That's a lot. Okay. So, you went back to fashion for a little bit, but then eventually decided to leave that, right? And to be at home raising your kids full time?
Jolene Poyder:
No. So, I worked part time until the kids were five. I got laid off in fashion.
Johanna Almstead:
In fashion.
Jolene Poyder:
And so then the conversation was, what do I do? Do I go find another fashion job or do I pursue my art and take care of the kids? So, I decided to pursue art and take care of my kids.
Johanna Almstead:
And I've talked about this with other people who've been on this podcast who are parents and artists. And I always wonder, this is what I really want to talk to you about is, how do you do it? How do you fit it in? Did you have a clear practice? Was it just you were working around them? Were you just squeezing it in or were you getting a dedicated hour once a day? Or what did it look like to pursue your art and to be a mother of twins?
Jolene Poyder:
Well, luckily they were five, so they had full-time school and I was very disciplined about my schedule.
Johanna Almstead:
We're going to talk about that a lot today, I think.
Jolene Poyder:
So, I would work out before they woke up and then I would take them to school. And so, the only thing I had to do was I decided to do a mixed podcast every month. So, I would preview music all week long and then buy the music and figure out how it all was put together, and I'd do an hour long mixed house music podcasts once a month. And I was super religious about it. It dropped every 28 days on a Wednesday. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
And that fueled you?
Jolene Poyder:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, I could totally work around their schedule.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
And you gave yourself enough time? You didn't try to like produce a podcast every day or every week or every two weeks. You were like, you gave yourself a reasonable amount of time.
Jolene Poyder:
And I wanted it to be super consistent. So I was like, "What can I make super consistent?" So, it ran for almost 10 years. It was called Color Splash Mixes. I took a Pantone color and named my mix according to that Pantone color because I love color and so I... Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
This does not have anything to do with anything except color. Have you heard of the game called Cues for Hues?
Jolene Poyder:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my gosh. I just got it with my kids and it's basically a giant Pantone board and you get clues. Cues, I guess they call them cues, not clues, but you pull a card and you get four colors on it and you get to choose which one you're going to do and you have to give two describing cues to the people you're playing with to get them to choose the color on the board. It's so fun. We have to play it. I'm going to have a game night and you're going to come over here.
Jolene Poyder:
I would love that. Yeah, I love color. I think the Pantone color cards, it's just my thing.
Johanna Almstead:
It's porn.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah. So, I was so excited. And it's hard to come up with a mixed name every... And I was like, if I pick a color and the name's cool.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
So, I had a friend who was a colorist and we would go over names. We would pick colors and then we'd read the name. And sometimes the name was cabbage. It was a beautiful color, but I was like, no, there's absolutely no way.
Johanna Almstead:
There's no cabbage mix in my world.
Jolene Poyder:
There's no way. So, it would have to also be a good color and also a good name in order for it to... Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that. And I love that it's just so unique to you, this idea of combining color and music and that was your special sauce. It's kind of beautiful. I just was reading, have you seen the beautiful book called Still? Her name is Mary Jo, and I can't remember her last name, but I will look it up and put it in the show notes. So, she was like an aeronautical engineer, but always had this like artist inside of her, and she too talks a lot about discipline in her practice. And she said basically, "If you think about being an artist every day, then you're a thinker. And if you dream about being an artist every day, you're a dreamer. And if you read about it, you're a reader. And if you study art, then you're a student. But if you just do art every day, you are an artist." And I thought that was so extraordinary. So, she similarly set up a practice for herself where she was going to share on Instagram one found object from nature every day.
Jolene Poyder:
Wow.
Johanna Almstead:
She was going to do it for a year and she ended up doing it for 10 years, and she would photograph it and she played with styles, but essentially her signature became on this very stark white background. And so, it might be a dead bird, it might be an acorn, it might be a dried flower, but whatever. And now, there's this beautiful book out that she's published from her 10 years of this practice. And she's like, "It took over my life and it basically changed the way I moved through the world and it changed the way my family moved through the world because we were always looking for what today's object was going to be."
And so, this idea of having this practice that was regular and scheduled and timed to fit into your life, because that was another thing she talked about was like, "I can't produce some giant photo shoot every day. It has to be able to be done every day," in her case, and yours every 28 days or whatever it was, that I think is so much the key to it, right? Is this idea of finding something that works and then being super, super consistent with it. And that's what sort of fuels it even further.
Jolene Poyder:
Right. You have to treat it like it's a job.
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Jolene Poyder:
Because if you don't, then you're never going to get anywhere with anything.
Johanna Almstead:
So, can you talk to me a little bit about, once you've set those guidelines, okay, so you're like, "I'm going to do this mix. It's going to be a color." What is your creative process like to get into the actual work?
Jolene Poyder:
For DJing?
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. Actually, any of your work. I feel like we're going to talk about all the other things you do too, but do you have a way in?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. For DJing, you'd just be previewing, previewing. And while you're previewing records, you start kind of thinking about how things can go together. And so, I feel like with all of my creative output, it's all been about, it's very jazz, it's very improvisational. Some DJs would come to the club and their records would be perfectly laid out. Like I'm playing A, then I'm playing B, then I'm playing C. And the way I did it was like, here's a group and it may have a Latin feel to it. And then, here's another group where it's this vibe. So, I definitely would sort them by vibe, but I would never know what I was going to play next.
So, in the moment, there's this, when you're DJing live, there's this panic, but it fuels you of what's going to be next, what's going to be next? And so, you're thumbing through your records and you cannot figure out what's going to be next and the record's almost done and you've just got to like do it, right?
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Jolene Poyder:
And that's how I've been very improvisational with all of my creative output. So, I think it's probably started with DJing, knowing that that's the way I like to play.
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Jolene Poyder:
I like the pressure, but I also like the play.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
And so then when I started quilting, yeah, that same improvisational situation came up for me. I didn't like a quilt that was given to me by someone who had made the pattern and I just follow the pattern and I picked my fabrics and I go... That was not interesting to me at all for quilting. In fashion, there was a lot of excess of denim and dress shirt that was around me. And I was like, "What are you guys doing with that?" And they're like, "Oh, we just throw it in the trash." I'm like, "Oh, no, no, no, no, no."
So, I brought home all this denim. I brought home all this dress shirt fabric and I just started playing, and it's so fun to be at the sewing machine and just put two things that don't seem like they go together at all, and then riffing off of it and keep on playing with it until you get something that you like.
Johanna Almstead:
I think that's so interesting because that's sort of a little bit how I parent my kids also is this idea of this sort of structure around things that is pretty set. It's pretty, you're going to work every day, you're going to do a certain thing and you're going to produce. But then within that structure or framework, then there's all this play. There's just all this fun. There's all this improv. I think that that's really interesting. And I think, like you said, I think there are artists who go into something completely opposite of that. They have the idea of what they want it to be and they just are trying to execute to that idea. Whereas yours is the complete opposite.
Jolene Poyder:
It's all play and improvisation. If I think about all my things, yeah, and when I do, when it's too rigid at the beginning, I'm super disappointed with the outcome.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Especially in pottery. If I have a rigid idea and then it comes out of the kiln, it's usually absolutely nothing that I wanted it to be. But if I play and go, "I don't know, these two colors don't seem like they go together at all," and throw it in the kiln, then it comes out and everyone's surrounding me going, "Oh my gosh, what colors are those?"
Johanna Almstead:
Is that why whenever I ask you to repeat something, I'm like, "Can you make me a set of these?" You're like, "I don't think so. That was a one shot deal."
Jolene Poyder:
Maybe. Maybe.
Johanna Almstead:
Maybe. So, let's talk about pottery because that came more recently in your life.
Jolene Poyder:
Yep, it did.
Johanna Almstead:
You've been doing the music stuff, you've been doing the textile stuff, you've been doing the fabrics and all that thing. But then pottery, what happened? How did you find yourself at a potting wheel?
Jolene Poyder:
I know. I wanted to get more into a community situation. The kids were getting older and there was just some random email that's like, "Sign up for classes." So, I was like, that's something that I could be interested in. And then I got to the class and realized I don't like actually being dirty and I don't really like the feeling of clay. So, what am I going to do, right?? And we're wedging the clay and I'm going, "Oh my gosh, what did I just do?" And then we got at the wheel and I hadn't vinyl DJ'd for a little bit. And as soon as I put the clay on the wheel, I was like, "Oh my gosh, this is just like DJing."
Johanna Almstead:
Oh my God, I had never even put that together. Duh. Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then she's like, "Okay, you need to center it." And I knew exactly what she meant because when you get a skip in the record, you can feel that when you're touching the vinyl. And so, it made total sense to me that the centering of clay was just like, "Oh yeah, that's exactly..." It's a sweet spot and you can feel it as soon as you centered clay. Just like when you've done a really good mix, you can feel that too.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so cool.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. So then I got over being dirty and I got over...
Johanna Almstead:
Having clay under your nails.
Jolene Poyder:
And pottery's been really important for me because you cannot control it. No matter what you think, you cannot control it. You can have an idea and then it goes into the kiln and it completely can change. And so, it's taught me to not go for perfect, but go for just cool. Just go for... Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Let's talk about control. Yes. How does control operate in your life?
Jolene Poyder:
Well, I am a Virgo, so I have to resist-
Johanna Almstead:
Yes, you are.
Jolene Poyder:
... the perfection thing every day, but I've gotten really good about it and I think pottery has helped me. I used to really want to control everything and I think that hurt me in trying to parent because it's no fun to have a parent that's trying to control you all the time. So, I've tried to release and it's proven to be a much better way of parenting.
Johanna Almstead:
Have your kids noticed?
Jolene Poyder:
I don't think so because I think it all happened when they were still young enough to not notice. I don't know. I haven't asked them that question, but definitely improvising is way better in most things.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. That's a good lesson.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I think, right?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you have rituals or routines, speaking of control and discipline, that you like to have in your life to ensure your artistic flow, to ensure your sanity? Do you have any... What do you practice to make sure that you stay centered?
Jolene Poyder:
Yes. So I wake up every morning and I write three pages.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay.
Jolene Poyder:
Just of that.
Johanna Almstead:
Before you even get out of bed?
Jolene Poyder:
No. I get out of bed and do it. And then, I go downstairs and I exercise for an hour, have to do that or I'll lose my mind. And then from there, then the day can open up. And some days it's researching, some days it's just getting things done. I do know about myself that if I start hand sewing, it's really hard for me to stop. So, I have to remind myself to take a break. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you ever write more than three pages?
Jolene Poyder:
No.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, so is the three pages as part of the...
Jolene Poyder:
The artist's way.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Interesting.
Jolene Poyder:
You know that book, The Artist Way?
Johanna Almstead:
I do know it. Yeah. It's funny because I've never done it in all of my years of... I think I owned it for a while, but never actually read it.
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, okay. Well, it's all about three pages.
Johanna Almstead:
I do not have the same discipline as you, which is why I think I avoided it for so long.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
But I've thought about it recently because one of our other guests who you need to know, you and Mary Burry need to know each other, and luckily you're both local to me. She is a gardener and she's a gardening coach and she's amazing. And she too, I believe, is very-
Jolene Poyder:
I've met her and talked.
Johanna Almstead:
... You have?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Separately from me. How dare you? Oh yah, because your kids are the same age, right?
Jolene Poyder:
But also, I have a neighbor who's friendly with her and so...
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, that's so funny. But she also was talking about it recently and I also think of her as somebody who's quite disciplined and quite even-keeled. And I was like, maybe that's the key. Which came first? The Artist's Way or the discipline? If I were disciplined enough to read The Artist's Way, maybe I would find out.
Jolene Poyder:
Well, it's interesting because when you have a full-time job, if you were to go to an office or you have a full-time job where you're expected to do this, this and this and this. But when you are your own boss, the day can get away from you very, very easily, right? And then, all of a sudden it's 3:00 PM and you've done absolutely nothing.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. So, you feel like if you've done your pages and you've done your workout, you've given yourself a structure.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes. And then, I can go from there.
Johanna Almstead:
How do you decide what you're going to do next?
Jolene Poyder:
It kind of depends on what I feel like is in the pipeline, what's being expected of me. And then what, I mean, truth be told, this is a horrible, privileged statement for me to say, but what brings me the most joy?
Johanna Almstead:
I don't think that's... I mean, yes, it is privileged. I don't think it's horrible. I think it's quite beautiful.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. So ,the things that will ignite in my head and I'll just have to complete whatever it is kind of thing.
Johanna Almstead:
I would like to understand, in your mind, what does the word art mean to you? What do you think of when you think of the word art?
Jolene Poyder:
It's so big, right? I feel like it's everywhere. It's in everything.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
For a long time, I didn't know how to describe myself. I hated the word, I'm a retired DJ.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh yeah, no.
Jolene Poyder:
I didn't like that at all. And then one day I was just like, "You know what? I have all these things that I'm super passionate about. I should start calling myself an artist." And this is only a couple years ago.
Johanna Almstead:
I remember.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. And it was a big deal because I didn't feel like I could legitimately say it. But then I started looking around at all the stuff that I create and I was like, "Oh yeah, actually I am." And I have been for a very long time.
Johanna Almstead:
Very long time. Well, and I think that that's one of the things, we've talked about this on one of our walks was this drive you have to create because I say you're an artist, but you're also a maker. You are a physical maker. We found this out at your... Jolene hosts these beautiful craft nights, and I don't like crafts and I'm not good at them, but I really like to go and everyone's like, "What are you working on?" I'm like, "Nothing." I don't make things really with my hands, except food. I make food. I love to make food and I love to feed people.
But we were talking about with you this compulsion to make that you are... When you were being a, I hate to say this because everyone's a full-time mom, but when you were focusing mostly on your kids, you were still in the car, at rowing practice needle pointing or crocheting or whatever you were doing because you physically had this need to create and make things with your hands.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
I think that means you're an artist.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Yeah. I guess it does. I mean, and the interesting thing, and the horrible thing, is that I only need to create, I don't need to show it off at all. I just need to make it, right? And so, I'm trying to push myself over to the, I actually need to show people what I'm doing and just create, create, create, create.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. And you're going to drown in pots and crochet. You're going to die surrounded. She was smothered to death by her creations because she wouldn't show them to anybody and she wouldn't let anyone buy them.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. I just, my hands need to be moving.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, do you ever think about a point in your life where like, was there anything you did and you think, "Man, if I had not done that, my life would have taken such a different turn."
Jolene Poyder:
Maybe moved to New York.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. Seems like it.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. New York City is my love spot. It's just, it feeds me creatively and just socially. I actually am the type of person that loves to be around a lot of people. I think.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Clubbing is like, I love being whooshed. A crowded subway, I love that feeling.
Johanna Almstead:
Interesting.
Jolene Poyder:
I really love being around people and feeling all their energy. And that's the kind of cool thing about DJing is that that's all you're doing. You're just feeling energy.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. Like that's your whole job.
Jolene Poyder:
That's your job.
Johanna Almstead:
It's to catch the vibe.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Get in tune with what the crowd's feeling, and if it's crowded... And then the room, you start feeling it bounce in this weird way. Not like them dancing, but you just feel this movement happening. It's the highest that you could ever get in your life.
Johanna Almstead:
Are we ever going to get you to DJ again? I'm determined. I'm determined to throw a really good party and make you DJ it.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. I often have said I want to do book club, but not do books, do dance club instead.
Johanna Almstead:
Can we please do that? 100%. That I'm down for. Craft night, can't do it. Book club, can't do it. Dance night, 100%. I have this whole idea for a dance party, a regular one.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Why do you think that is? We as Americans, in this particular day and age, particularly grownup Americans, don't dance. What the hell? you go to any other country, people are dancing all the time.
Jolene Poyder:
I know.
Johanna Almstead:
Back in the day, adults were dancing, like in the 50s and the 60s, American adults were dancing out at supper clubs and stuff. Why are we not dancing?
Jolene Poyder:
I don't know.
Johanna Almstead:
It's not good for us as a society. We need to be dancing more.
Jolene Poyder:
So healing. It's such an amazing thing.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. 2026, I didn't put this on my list, but it's got to be more dancing. We got to have more dancing. That's it.
Jolene Poyder:
We just got to find like three more people that like to dance.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, I've got three more people. I also, by the way, don't trust people who don't like to dance. I just don't think it's healthy.
Jolene Poyder:
Wow. Including my husband. He doesn't like to dance.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. I think it's like, come on, just dance.
Jolene Poyder:
I know.
Johanna Almstead:
You heard it here first, guys. We're going to do this.
Jolene Poyder:
We kind of went full circle because that was my childhood. There's no dancing.
Johanna Almstead:
No dancing. Speaking of that, do you remember, what was your first time post-religious household where you went dancing, like you yourself on a dance floor, letting it rip?
Jolene Poyder:
Well, I remember my mother, we went to go visit our family and she was dancing and she had so much joy. And it was like, I've never seen my mother so happy in my life than her dancing. That's lodged in my head. So, when I was in high school, I used to sneak off to underage clubs.
Johanna Almstead:
And that's when you danced.
Jolene Poyder:
That's when I started. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
The limelight. I used to go to the limelight when I was in high school. You want to know something great? So, we had these polyester plaid field hockey and lacrosse kilts. We wore kilts as part of our uniform and I would hike those bad boys up. I would roll them at the waist and wear them with a body suit.
Jolene Poyder:
You were so cute.
Johanna Almstead:
High socks above my knee, over my knee with my Doc Martens. And I would wear that on a school night to the limelight clubs, to go dancing.
Jolene Poyder:
Amazing.
Johanna Almstead:
And then shake it out and wear it on the field the next day. That was good. It was a good look.
Jolene Poyder:
That was really cute.
Johanna Almstead:
That was so cute. Okay. Of all the accomplishments you've had in your life, what's the one you're most proud of?
Jolene Poyder:
I mean, besides kids?
Johanna Almstead:
Doesn't have to be besides kids. They could be your most proud achievement.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. I think they are.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
I don't talk about it much, but yeah, I think they are.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, yeah. They're good kids. And so, you're at this crossroads now because you have spent much of your time fitting your artistic passions around their schedule, and now they have flown the coop and they're both off to college this year.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
What has that meant as a mother, as a human, and as an artist? What ha that meant for you? What has that changed? That must feel very different.
Jolene Poyder:
It does, but because they were in high school and didn't need me as much, it's not as drastic, I would say, as I thought it was.
Johanna Almstead:
You could taper off your attention towards them a little bit.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they don't want to pal out. I don't know. Maybe some kids do, but my kids were off with their friends all the time. So, you get that feeling already. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
And now you have an empty nest.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. But I am able to spend more time... It used to be little chunks of time, and now I can spend a solid bit of time on one thing.
Johanna Almstead:
I was thinking about that the other day, the idea of like, oh my God, to be able to just immerse yourself in something and not have to go pick them up and drive them to [inaudible 00:46:31] for rowing and then make sure dinner was ready. And the fact that you could just be in your process for many hours straight, just feels so foreign to me now because it's so far away from me still, but that's so delicious.
Jolene Poyder:
It is. That has been a huge plus, is being able to focus on something for a long period of time without feeling guilty about it either.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. And no interruptions.
Jolene Poyder:
I know. Because before, I used to go to the pottery student, feel guilty.
Johanna Almstead:
What is that about, do we think? Because you were going when they were in school. So, why did you feel guilty?
Jolene Poyder:
No, I would go, if it was the weekend. Not guilty, but just like, I hope I'm not missing out on time that maybe they'd want to hang out with their mom.
Johanna Almstead:
Even if they didn't really want to hang out.
Jolene Poyder:
No, they never did. But just the idea.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. Okay. So, what's something that you once believed about yourself that you have since outgrown?
Jolene Poyder:
I always believe that in order for something to be good, it had to be perfect.
Johanna Almstead:
And you think pottery has changed that?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, I do. Yeah. And now I think the exact opposite.
Johanna Almstead:
If it's too perfect, it's no fun.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. And especially in our AI world, to see the human hand is, the handmade aspect of it is way cooler now.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. It's so funny, as I've been going through, moving back into my house and going through everything, I'm trying to really , I call it process everything. I'm opening every single box and deciding if I want it or not or whatever. And so, I have a lot of my parents' stuff still, and I have found these objects that as a kid I was kind of embarrassed about because they were kooky, weird pottery, or I knew my mom had gotten them at a vintage store or a tag sale or something. And I was like, "God, mom, why can't we just have like [inaudible 00:48:34] kitchens with matching bedroom sets from [inaudible 00:48:36]?"
And my parents were kind of hippies and all these textiles and all these quilts. Oh my God, I have so many quilts. I should show you the quilts. So many quilts. And it's so interesting that now, in particular in this moment, I think it's zeitgeist wise, but also just me personally, and in this new house that feels very new, right, because it's so... I'm latching onto these old handmade things that have so much personal touch to them. It's funny.
Jolene Poyder:
They have emotional responses to them, right?
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm totally my mother's daughter. I found an entire thing of wooden spoons. She loves wooden spoons. And I have 20 wooden spoons right now because I just added hers into the mix. I was like, and cutting boards, beautiful old cutting boards that she's used for every day, for my whole childhood. I still have them. And I'm like, I'm so her daughter, and all this weird pottery that I'm like, can't get rid of.
Jolene Poyder:
But you're describing everything that has a hand print on it.
Johanna Almstead:
Right, right.
Jolene Poyder:
You know?
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, totally.
Jolene Poyder:
You're not talking about plastic things that you can't feel the human hand on. Like wood resists you and curves in and has splashes.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. And it's so true. I feel like that's, particularly in the world of AI and in the world of everything looking the same on Instagram and everybody dressing the same because they just see it all on Instagram. I'm just like, this is all the only things I want now are these things that I have had my whole life.
Jolene Poyder:
I know. Take out the sterile.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, totally. Is there anything that you've said no to in your life that you wish that you had said yes to?
Jolene Poyder:
Oh.
Johanna Almstead:
A hard one, right?
Jolene Poyder:
It's so hard. Anything you said no to? No.
Johanna Almstead:
That's a good place to be.
Jolene Poyder:
Does that mean no regrets? Yeah. I feel like everything in my life has come to me. Even the hardest things of my life have taught me really beautiful things.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
What is your idea of a perfect day off? I don't know if your maker brain ever takes a day off, but...
Jolene Poyder:
I don't think I would like a day off. I really don't. I find so much joy in making.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah. So, no days off for you.
Jolene Poyder:
No, and I get annoyed if I have a day where all I'm doing is running off and doing errands and stuff like that.
Johanna Almstead:
But that's not a day off. A day off of, like the perfect way you would spend a day maybe then.
Jolene Poyder:
No, no, no, no. I'm saying I get annoyed if I haven't sat down and done something.
Johanna Almstead:
Made something.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, made something. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Interesting. And so, no lounging about in your house and sleeping all day or going to a beach or something?
Jolene Poyder:
No, actually my perfect day would be invite friends over and anybody who likes house music and we just play the records that are behind me and dance, that would be perfect.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I'm coming. Then we're going to make you have a day off. I'm going to do that. But then again, you're still like making...
Jolene Poyder:
Maybe I have the DJ friends come over and they also [inaudible 00:52:00].
Johanna Almstead:
They DJ. You get to actually just dance.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I love that.
Jolene Poyder:
That would be awesome. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. So, we are at the very exciting time in this podcast where we ask the lightning round of silly questions. Some of them are about food, but they're not all about food. And I know you have strong opinions about food, so I love to talk about food.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes, I do.
Johanna Almstead:
So, don't overthink this.
Jolene Poyder:
Okay. I won't.
Johanna Almstead:
Do not let perfection be in the way of progress here.
Jolene Poyder:
I'm fully improvising. Let's go.
Johanna Almstead:
Favorite comfort food?
Jolene Poyder:
Ice cream.
Johanna Almstead:
What kind?
Jolene Poyder:
Vanilla.
Johanna Almstead:
Are you a year round ice cream person? Like you would eat ice cream now when it's snowing like this?
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, for sure. Yes. I absolutely adore ice cream.
Johanna Almstead:
All day, every day. Okay. What is something you're really good at?
You have to answer. I'm not letting you out of this one. And I know it's going to make you really uncomfortable.
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, I've been told that I'm really good at making chocolate chip cookies.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. I don't think I've ever eaten your chocolate chip cookies, so I'm going to take that as their word. What is something you're really bad at?
Jolene Poyder:
I wish I were better at drawing.
Johanna Almstead:
Are you bad at drawing or do you just wish you were better? Because those are two different things.
Jolene Poyder:
I wish I was a cartoon artist. If there was any wish of what I wish I could do, it'd be drawing cartoons.
Johanna Almstead:
Really?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Like an amazing illustrator.
Johanna Almstead:
Have you ever taken any illustration classes or anything?
Jolene Poyder:
No. I would love to know how to draw.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. What is your favorite word?
Jolene Poyder:
Daddy.
Johanna Almstead:
Daddy? Aw. I love that. And you called your daddy your whole life, daddy?
Jolene Poyder:
If I wanted something, I would call him daddy. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
That's so beautiful.
Jolene Poyder:
He was so important in my life though. It's like that word just brings love into my mouth when I say it.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
That's really beautiful. I love that. What is your least favorite food? Like deal breaker, not eating it.
Jolene Poyder:
Wow. I mean, it would probably be the things that I don't eat because I'm a vegetarian.
Johanna Almstead:
Right.
Jolene Poyder:
Those are all deal breakers.
Johanna Almstead:
Is there one that's more deal breakery than others?
Jolene Poyder:
Of the food I eat, I would probably say raw celery is just not my jam.
Johanna Almstead:
Raw celery. Really?
Jolene Poyder:
Too stringy. Can't deal with the strings.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh. You're like, I need to weave these into something. Can't deal with... That's so weird. That's not so weird. But I weirdly really enjoy raw celery.
Jolene Poyder:
You do?
Johanna Almstead:
I like the crunch. I like a big crunch and I really like a good dip. I like a crudité. All right. Do you like cooked celery? It's okay?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Cooked celery is fine. And I could get by eating celery, but I don't like the string of it.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Least favorite word.
Jolene Poyder:
These are hard, Johanna.
Johanna Almstead:
I know.
Jolene Poyder:
Least favorite word. It would probably have to be a derogatory word towards women.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you have one particular one? You can just say what it starts with.
Jolene Poyder:
I don't like when people call someone a bitch.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Yeah, that's a good one. What is the best piece of advice you've ever received?
Jolene Poyder:
Show me, don't tell me.
Johanna Almstead:
Love that. If your personality were a flavor, what would it be?
Jolene Poyder:
My personality as a flavor, huh? Blackberry.
Johanna Almstead:
Blackberry. Oh, I love that. That checks. I like that. Okay. Last supper, you're leaving this body and this earth. It's not sad. You're just graduating to the next realm.
Jolene Poyder:
Yes.
Johanna Almstead:
What are you eating tonight?
Jolene Poyder:
Bedouin Tent lentil soup.
Johanna Almstead:
Bedouin tent lentil soup? Yum. Okay. Anything else with that?
Jolene Poyder:
Ice cream for dessert.
Johanna Almstead:
Ice cream for dessert. Are you having bread?
Jolene Poyder:
So, when you get lentil soup from Bedouin tent, you get homemade bread with it that you dip into it. Bedouin Tent is a restaurant on Atlantic Avenue that if I'm anywhere in the radius of Brooklyn on Atlantic Avenue, I have to go into that place.
Johanna Almstead:
And get their lentil soup.
Jolene Poyder:
Yep.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. And you don't drink alcohol, but are you drinking anything else, or are you drinking alcohol? You're allowed. I shouldn't put any parameters on this. It's your last night. You can do whatever the fuck you want.
Jolene Poyder:
I don't know, because I always have a kombucha every single day. So, I probably would have already had the kombucha for the day, but that's like-
Johanna Almstead:
You could have 10 more because-
Jolene Poyder:
... That's my favorite drink.
Johanna Almstead:
... What flavor is your favorite?
Jolene Poyder:
Ginger eight.
Johanna Almstead:
Yeah, mine do. I love that. So kombucha, lentil soup. Really?
Jolene Poyder:
Wackadoo.
Johanna Almstead:
Going out with a bang, this one. And vanilla ice cream.
Jolene Poyder:
No, I probably would get Netflix and Chill, to be quite honest.
Johanna Almstead:
Netflix and Chill, the Ben and Jerry's flavor?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
What is in that?
Jolene Poyder:
It's peanut buttery, chocolatey, but it keeps you up at night, but I'm not...
Johanna Almstead:
Who cares?
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. I'm not sleeping.
Johanna Almstead:
You don't need to be rested for what's going on tomorrow.
Jolene Poyder:
That's why I said, Netflix and Chill then.
Johanna Almstead:
Drink all the kombucha you want. Get yourself jacked up.
Have you ever had a moment in your life where you've had to eat your words?
Jolene Poyder:
All the time.
Johanna Almstead:
Do you have one in particular that you can remember?
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, man. No. But most of my friends know that I'm a truth teller and that I try very hard not to tell any lies. So, that can get me in trouble sometimes.
Johanna Almstead:
They're like, "I kind of wish you had lied to me about that."
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
I understand that.
Jolene Poyder:
But then, on the same side is they know they can come to me and get the honest opinion.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. There's great value in that.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Sometimes it's just uncomfortable on the receiving end.
Okay. If you could eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be? Every day, all day. Definitely not celery.
Jolene Poyder:
Nope. I mean, to feel great, I would eat broccoli, but if it didn't affect me.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. You don't have to worry about it.
Jolene Poyder:
Ice cream.
Johanna Almstead:
Ice cream. All day, every day.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
All different flavors.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Where's your happy place?
Jolene Poyder:
It's already passed.
Johanna Almstead:
What's that?
Jolene Poyder:
Just being on Shelter Island with my boys that are 10 years old and my dog and my husband. And, yeah, that's my happy place.
Johanna Almstead:
But they have to be 10. So, yeah, that's tough. Can you still be happy if you go back to Shelter Island?
Jolene Poyder:
Yes, yes, yes, yes. I just need a dog.
Johanna Almstead:
Well, that's a whole other episode we're going to talk about because we need to get you a dog. I have two, I'm happy to send them over. What did you have for dinner last night?
Jolene Poyder:
Oh. Well, I drove my son to Ithaca, New York and back. So, I had leftovers last night. Isn't that great?
Johanna Almstead:
Leftover what?
Jolene Poyder:
It's called bear pasta in my family.
Johanna Almstead:
Bear, like B-E-A-R? Like roar, bear? Okay. What does bear pasta have in it?
Jolene Poyder:
It has olives and roasted red peppers and tofurky Italian sausage and onion and spinach.
Johanna Almstead:
Why is it called bear pasta?
Jolene Poyder:
Because my brother, he's called Bear. His name's Brandon, but his nickname is Bear. And he's the one that gave us the recipe. So, it's called bear pasta.
Johanna Almstead:
Bear pasta. Sounds delicious. What do you wear when you feel like you need to take on the world? Like big meeting or big hot date or just want to feel your best, big party, you want to go dancing? I don't know. What do you wear?
Jolene Poyder:
I try and think of the last thing that I bought and is the most fashionable. That's how I feel the best.
Johanna Almstead:
Interesting. Okay. Most memorable meal you've ever had?
Jolene Poyder:
Wow, these are really hard. Most memorable meal I've ever had? I mean, it has to be, I went to a cooking class in the south of France and they would take us to places, and definitely one of those. They had lavender ice cream that I still think about.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, wow.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. There's a theme here. The ice cream is a big theme. Go-to coping mechanism on a bad day. You've already done your pages, you've already done your workout. You've already had your kombucha.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
What do you do?
Jolene Poyder:
Every day I always go for a walk.
Johanna Almstead:
You're so good about that.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Even now that you don't have Frankie to walk with you, you still go on your walk?
Jolene Poyder:
Yep. Even now. Every day.
Johanna Almstead:
That's good.
Jolene Poyder:
Have to.
Johanna Almstead:
That is a very common theme on this podcast. So many people are walkers.
Jolene Poyder:
Oh, really?
Johanna Almstead:
Very interesting.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
That's like many, many people's go to. Okay. Dream dinner party guest list, alive or dead. They're all going to come, so you don't have to worry about them not accepting your invitation.
Jolene Poyder:
Oh my goodness.
Johanna Almstead:
Who are you inviting?
Jolene Poyder:
It's funny because you think about the combinations of people, right?
Johanna Almstead:
Right. Right.
Jolene Poyder:
You could invite Madonna, but is she going to piss everyone off?
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, that would be worth it, don't you think? Doesn't have to be the most civil dinner party. It's just, maybe shit's going to go down, but that's what makes a fun dinner party.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah. Madonna would probably have to be there. And then, a slew of female artists.
Johanna Almstead:
Like who?
Jolene Poyder:
I would probably invite Bisa Butler because she's my favorite quilter.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Do you think she and Madonna would talk about quilting?
Jolene Poyder:
Edith Heath of Heath Ceramics.
Johanna Almstead:
Heath Ceramics. Yeah.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, I would want her to be there. Who would I want in the music room? Mark Ronson would be fun to talk to, I think.
Johanna Almstead:
Totally. I just saw a clip from him recently and I was like, "I want to hang out with that dude."
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah, it's funny.
Johanna Almstead:
I mean, I used to kind of hang around, not really with him, but in the same places as him. And talked to him a few times, but I was like, where he is now as a father and out of the club scene but still in the music scene. I know, I agree. He'd be a great guest. Mark Ronson, if you're listening, give us a call. Okay. So, we've got Madonna, we've got the two artist ladies, we've got Mark Ronson. Who else?
Jolene Poyder:
And then, I'd want a few of my closest friends to be there just so we could talk about it after.
Johanna Almstead:
Just to witness it all.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Are you serving lentil soup there, on Bedouin Tent?
Jolene Poyder:
I'm not serving lentil soup.
Johanna Almstead:
Okay. Just checking. What is one thing you know for sure right now in this moment? You don't need to have known it yesterday, you don't need to know it tomorrow. Just something you know right now.
Jolene Poyder:
We've kind of hit on all of it. That perfection isn't the aim. I have to always remind myself of that. And that life is for a living. To just dive in instead of look at it from the sidelines.
Johanna Almstead:
Right. Don't be a spectator. Be a participant in your life.
Jolene Poyder:
Yeah.
Johanna Almstead:
Can you please tell people where they can find you and look at your beautiful things? Don't worry guys, she won't try to sell you anything because I try to buy things from her all the time and she won't let me. But you can look at things. You have a new Instagram?
Jolene Poyder:
I do, called Made by a DJ. Yeah. And DJJolene.com.
Johanna Almstead:
Yep. DJJolene.com still has all the, it has all the color mixes. So guys, if you're into-
Jolene Poyder:
House music.
Johanna Almstead:
... cool house music and pretty colors to go along with your cool house music, check it out because it's very, very fun. It's very throwback for me. I was like, when I listened to it makes me feel...
Jolene Poyder:
Young and alive again. You still are.
Johanna Almstead:
I still am. I still am. I'm still participating. Thank you very much for taking the time to talk with me today. I know people are going to be inspired by your discipline and your willingness to call yourself an artist because you are one, and your entire story and sharing that with us. So, thank you so much.
Jolene Poyder:
Thank you.
Johanna Almstead:
And it's been such a pleasure and such a gift to get to catch up with you because we haven't seen each other in a long time.
Jolene Poyder:
I know. Thank you, Johanna.
Johanna Almstead:
Oh, that was so fun. I'm constantly inspired by her drive to create and to make things. I did get an update text from her since we recorded and she wanted to add an addendum to her dinner party guest list. So, I'm going to read her text to you and add this into her list because I think it's quite beautiful. She says, and I quote, "I should have thought beforehand about your rapid fire questions. My biggest regret is the dinner party answer. What was I thinking? No gay men at the table? Boring. And if I'm really honest, I forgot I could invite all dead people. I would have invited my mom and dad to meet Billy and Felix." Those are her sons. "Also would have invited my oldest childhood friend that grew up with me that passed. Would be a much more meaningful dinner than some celebrities I don't know." Kind of like the combination of both, but I love this idea of her parents getting to come back to the dinner party so that they can meet her children.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this episode. I certainly did. I hope you're inspired to throw your own dinner party, create something beautiful, make something just for the sake of making it, and to be deliberate about your time. So, if you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who you think might also enjoy it. You can share it over Instagram, TikTok, you can share it over text. All you have to do is click on the little box in your media player that says share, and you can usually copy a link and paste it into any one of those things.
As always, we are so grateful to you for tuning in and listening to our stories. I hope you were inspired. I hope you were ignited. I hope you were pleased and had some fun today. If you're not doing so already, please follow us on social media. We are at Eat My Words the podcast on Instagram and TikTok, and we will catch you on the next one.
The Eat My Words podcast has been created and directed by me, Johanna Almstead. Our producer is Sophy Drouin. Our audio editor is Isabel Robertson, and our brand manager is Mila Bush.