Defining Hospitality

John DiJulius, President of the DiJulius Group, started his enterperinaul career operating a hair salon with his wife in Cleveland. Now, he is an international consultant, working with companies like the Ritz-Carlton. He’s the author of many books, including the must read “Customer Service Revolution.” John joins host Dan Ryan to talk about his views on #hospitality and what it all means to him. 

Takeaways: 
  • There are 10 rules to follow when it comes to customer service and making sure you provide a world class experience.
  • Hospitality is the emotional warmth that you get from someone. It’s not just contained to hotels and restaurants but applies in all aspects of life. 
  • The hospitality aptitude is a person's ability to recognize, meet and exceed customers expectations regardless of the circumstances. 
  • Hospitality can be defined by the five E’s; enthusiastic greeting, ear to ear smile, eye contact, engaged, and educate.
  • You want to be excited to have new clients or new guests at your hotel or restaurant. Excitement shows that you are and are interested in them.
  • There’s a gift in every conversation if you’re paying attention to it. You listen to what the other person is saying and send them a follow up, just to let them know you heard them.
  • F.O.R.D - Family, Occupation, Recreation, and Dreams. These are great ways to get to know someone and communicate with them.
  • John looks forward to the future where technology becomes better and better and makes all of our lives easier. 

Quote of the Show:
 
5:50  “I don't believe hospitality is an industry. I believe it's a piece of the experience every company should deliver. I think PricewaterhouseCoopers, lawyers, whatever industry manufacturing, we should be in the hospitality business, all of us that happens to have really smart lawyers, accountants, widget makers, whatever that means. I really believe it and how I define hospitality is, it's a feeling you give me. Ideally it's an emotional warmth, but it's emotional.”

Links:
 
Shout Outs:
 
0:03 Ritz-Carlton
1:38 Chick-Fil-A
1:40 Starbucks
1:52 Spirit Airlines
10:00 Danny Meyer
10:01 Union Square Cafe
14:01 “How to Make Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie
15:30 Balthazar, Keith McNally restaurant
20:50 New Day USA
48:48 Tesla 
48:50 Peloton
48:51 Lulu Lemon
48:54 Apple

Ways to Tune In: 

Creators & Guests

Host
Dan Ryan
Host of Defining Hospitality

What is Defining Hospitality?

Welcome to Defining Hospitality, the podcast focused on highlighting the most influential figures in the hospitality industry. In each episode we provide 1 on 1, in depth interviews with experts in the industry to learn what hospitality means to them. We feature expert advice on working in the industry, behind the scenes looks at some of your favorite brands, and in depth explorations of unique hospitality projects.

Defining Hospitality is hosted by Founder and CEO of Agency 967, Dan Ryan. With over 30 years of experience in hospitality, Dan brings his expertise and passion to each episode as he delves into the latest trends and challenges facing the industry.

Episodes are released every week on Wednesday mornings.

To listen to episodes, visit https://www.defininghospitality.live/ or subscribe to Defining Hospitality wherever you get your podcasts.

Dan Ryan: [00:00:00] What I do is inconsequential. Why I do what I do is I get to shorten people's journeys every day. What I love about our hospitality industry is that it's our mission to make people feel cared for while on their journeys. Together we'll explore what hospitality means in the built environment, in business, and in our daily lives.
I'm Dan Ryan, and this is Defining Hospitality. Today's guest is an international consultant with companies like Ritz Carlton Hotels. He's a world class customer service experience consulting expert. He's the author of many books, including Customer Service Revolution, which is a must read. He's the president of the De Julius Group.
Ladies and gentlemen, John de Julius, welcome
John DiJulius: John. Thank you. I'm so excited to be on here. I'm
Dan Ryan: so glad that you're here too. And just to let the audience know, The way that John has found his way here is I was a student at this entrepreneurial master's program at mit. John was one of the [00:01:00] first one of the speakers on the first day.
And from thinking about hospitality, delivering, receiving, putting customers first, he put so many ideas in all of our heads from around the world and influenced and impacted so many of us with real tactical, tangible things. And I think that this ties perfectly into hotels, um, because it's all about giving, receiving, listening, and serving others.
So John, I just thank you again for being
John DiJulius: here. My pleasure. Really, really happy to be here. Um, John, tell us
Dan Ryan: about, uh, your experience with Ritz Carleton. And I guess we can start there. And then what we can do is I'll kind of peel back the onion and just kind of start asking a bit more questions surrounding how you deliver hospitality to others through all of your businesses.
John DiJulius: Yeah. So, uh, um, Ritz Carlton, like a lot of, if you look at my, uh, the De Julius Group's client list, it's odd because the companies that hire us are already [00:02:00] great. Um, so it's like, why are they hiring you like, you know, chick-fil-A or the Ritz, their Starbucks, or, you know, many, uh, five star, uh, properties, or five diamond properties, or, you know, whoever.
And it's like, you know, those shouldn't be the ones calling us. Uh, spirit Airlines should be the ones calling us, but you know, it, it's always the ones that obviously get it and are obsessed and paranoid. Um, that they're gonna lose that competitive advantage. So, um, those companies like Ritz Carlton, um, you know, I've learned as much, um, from them as I've, you know, probably shared with them.
But, um, we have found that in 25 plus years of, of working with the best companies and researching the best companies in any industry, there's just a commonality that they all focus on. There's 10 things, we call 'em, 10 commandments, you know, from the customer experience, action statement to world class, [00:03:00] internal, you know, culture to having non-negotiable standards.
They all, uh, are focused and constantly obsessed over these 10 things that make them significantly better than anyone else in their industry.
Dan Ryan: And from when you first started off as a, as an entrepreneur, you had, uh, hair salons all over the Cleveland area, and that kind of launched you into this path of where you are.
How did you go from small business owner to working with the best, um, companies in the world and making their already great delivery of service that much better?
John DiJulius: You know, like anything, uh, probably most entrepreneurs say total. Um, even getting the salon industry was a total accent 30 years ago. It's not what I wanted to do.
Um, you know, open it with my wife who was a hairdresser and thought that would just, you know, be a stepping stone to my next business. But, you know, we, you know, we got really good at it. Um, and we [00:04:00] started, you know, growing really fast in the early, uh, nineties and mid nineties, which then, then became my focus, right?
I'm just gonna, the salon business and open salons all over the world, right? That is where I thought I was headed in, you know, 94, 95. And, uh, so people started asking me to speak, you know, because of the noise we were making in the salon in. . And you know, I didn't wanna be a speaker. Didn't you know, the only reason why I said yes was more locally, I thought it would be good marketing for my salons.
You'd attend it if you lived in Cleveland and say, oh my God, I'm gonna buy my wife a gift certificate, right? That's all. But every time I spoke, it led to two or three leads, um, and other industries and in other places that all of a sudden, you know, I was speaking more than I was running a salon business.
And then my first book. Secret Service, um, came out in 2002 and that pretty much took me from being a salon owner that spoke to [00:05:00] a speaker that owns salons and probably since 2002. While I still own the salons, I have nothing to do with them day to day. And then the speaking, um, evolved in the next five years to consulting, and that's where I spend a hundred percent of my time is speaking consulting on customer and employee experience and that, that a Jewish group does as well.
And
Dan Ryan: in all these conversations that I'm having about hospitality, delivering hospitality, um, What's amazing is it starts out cuz I'm in the hospitality industry, but everything about hospitality is transferable to any other industry and just being a human. And I feel like in many ways humans have lost this ability to listen and hear others and serve others, and we're becoming siloed.
Um, I think that this is a tremendous opportunity for hospitality to kind of get back to basics and build bridges between people. As you step [00:06:00] back and look at your journey as an entrepreneur from hair salons to this amazing consulting company and writing books and speaking everywhere, how do you define hospitality?
John?
John DiJulius: So, you know a couple things here. One, I don't believe hospitality as an industry, I believe it's a piece of the experience. Every company should deliver. I think Pricewaterhouse Coopers, uh, you know, lawyers, whatever industry, manufacturing, we should be in a hospitality business. All of us that happens to be have really smart lawyers, accountants, uh, you know, widget makers, whatever that means.
Um, and, and, and, you know, I really believe that how I define hospitality is it, it, it's a feeling you give me. It's it, you know, and ideally it's an emotional warmth, but it's a, it's emotional. So when we look at the, um, we call it the six components [00:07:00] of an experience, and the reason why I love hospitality, I guess in my terms, cuz I really don't know how the hospitality industry defines it, but the way I define it in more of a global sense is, you know, customer service and customer experience is too big.
I could say, you know, Dan, your, your, your customer service is poor and you can argue with me that you're the number one accurate, number one, most efficient, number one, whatever. And you're right. And that is part of the service and that is part of the experience. As is the chandelier, as is the, you know, comfort of, you know, whatever.
And so we break, you know, the customer experience now to six components. Physical, right? That's part of it. And that could be, if I'm coming to your place of business, your parking lot and how hard or easy it is to get into your parking lot, outta your parking lot, all that stuff that, that, you know, the, the physicality, the building, the wall, things we can't change from day to day, right?
Where you're located [00:08:00] and all that. Then there's the environmental, right? The, the, you know, when you walk in, how is it, how does it smell? Is it outdated? You know, all those things. And then there's the, you know, technical, you know, of, of each employee, of how smart are you at your job, right? I got a bumbling idiot, or I got the smartest person I've ever met at again, legal or, or, or waitress.
She's brilliant. She knows the menu, she knows what's gluten free, whatever that may be. Then there's the operational component. Which is, they're out of stock, out of toilet paper. The place is a mess, you know, whatever that may be. Um, and, but none of those have to do with how you personally make me feel.
Right? You could have the nicest, you know, Taj Mahal building and, and, and beautiful chandeliers and blah, blah, blah. You could be the smartest, most wicked person at your job, but you know, you could be a jerk. [00:09:00] Um, and so, you know that I call the sixth one hospitality. And that in my sense is how that individual makes me feel.
Cares for me, the human element of it, um, it it, which is critical and is lost today. It's been lost for a while in all businesses, but it's lost today, especially with the techno technological revolution we've seen in the past 15, 16 years. Um, I think we as leaders, Uh, subconsciously send the wrong message to our employees cuz we're saying, Hey, you know, have them use the app and our website and the one touch and this and this and this and kiosk and self-service.
But then what gets lost on the employees is they are the experience, right? You are the experience technology is 10%, you know, 90% is the human in most companies. But we aren't telling our employees that anymore. You know, technology can never build the rapport, can never [00:10:00] provide compassion and empathy and can make a brilliant come if we drop the ball.
But you can, you being whoever that customer facing employee is. So I'm sure that was pretty much the longest answer you got to that question. Uh, but yeah, I'm passionate
Dan Ryan: about it. Well, I can, I see your passion and it is long, but it's also super granular. Like it's, it's all encompassing and. I think, you know, I look at someone like a Danny Meyer who did, uh, union Square Cafe and speech back and everything.
That idea of the hospitality quotient as he, as a, as a metric. Um, yep. How do you measure, and, and you said that that six one of, of hospitality and that human interaction and feeling, how do you
John DiJulius: measure that? Well, we really call it, uh, same thing, but we call it service aptitude. And, and, and, and again, I, I've thought about renaming hospitality aptitude because the service is vague in today's world.
Right. But, so if you call it, you know, the hospitality aptitude, it's, [00:11:00] it's a person's ability to, uh, um, you know, re. And exceed meet customer's expectations regardless of the circumstances. So regardless of the circumstances is key because we could all be great on Monday, our slowest day, slowest hour, slowest time of year.
It's how are we when, you know, Saturday weekend, Holly, whatever your busi, fourth quarter, whatever your busiest time of year when we're short-staffed, um, you know, we're overbooked, whatever that may look like. And are we cheating the client? Is the guest, customer patient, whatever they are, is it based on employee?
So we have service aptitude or hospitality aptitude training and making sure that companies are spending. So I love asking this question, you know, to any leader, if you were to hire my son, one of my sons tomorrow to work in a customer facing position, how much training would you give him? [00:12:00] Okay. Some people say two days, some people say two weeks.
Some people say two months. That's not the answer I'm looking for. The answer I'm looking for is whether it's 40 hours, 400 hours, or 4,000 hours of those hours. How much is an operational technical processes? Frequently asked questions, how to place the order, book the appointment, whenever that may be, and how much of it is hospitality soft skill training?
And in typical businesses, it's 98% operational and less than 2%. And that two percent's really like, you know, little Johnny. The, the see, the, the, the sign in the back, it says, we're customer centric. We put customers first. Yeah, do that. And that's their training. But as you know, if you tell a hundred employees to deliver genuine hospitality or go above and beyond, uh, or seek, you'll get a hundred personal interpretations.
So the best companies, the Ritz Carltons, the Chick-Fil-A's they remove, remove the personal [00:13:00] interpretation. And they make it, you know, black and white and they teach. So going on a long answer. Let's talk about delivering genuine hospitality, right? Well, again, you tell a hundred people to do that, you're gonna get a hundred personal interpretations.
My definition of genuine hospitality is the five E's. Okay? Every time you come in contact with someone, coworker, ups, man or guest, client, whatever that is, you have to do the five E's. The five E's. Take less than five seconds to do the first three. Take one second to do simultaneously. Uh, enthusiastic creeps, ear to ear, smile.
Um, oh my God, I say this every day. Literally eye, oh, eye contact, eye contact, enthusiastic greet, ear to ear, smile. So when you walk in, I'm like, Dan, right? I just did all three right there. The fourth one is, is engaged. It, make it about Dan, not about me. And the fifth one. [00:14:00] Is educate. Every time someone communicates with me, it'd be it 30 seconds or 30 minutes.
They should walk away saying, no one's smarter than that person I just dealt with. So eye contact, enthusiastic, greet, ear, dear smile, engage and educate. Now it's black and white. Now I like to watch and see if you're delivering genuine hospitality. And there's no personal interpretation left on it. I,
Dan Ryan: uh, recently have been rereading the um, oh, Carnegie book, what's it called?
Uh, how to Make Friends and Influence People. But on the first, the first three that are instantaneous, he told this story about the family dog, right? And that dog is running at you. Just so happy and giving. And it just made me smile and I was like, oh my gosh. Not that we're dogs, but it's something as simple as it
John DiJulius: should be.
We should wagging our tails. We should deliver hospitality. My tails wagging cause I'm so excited. And another one to that point is we train on people The best way to greet someone. [00:15:00] Is with the expression. There you are. So, you know, and so I always show the, the clip from, um, Jerry Choir where she says, you had me at Hello, right?
Mm-hmm. . I always ask people, do you have people at Hello? Meaning when they walk in, your expression is, Dan, I saw that you were coming in. I was so pumped. I wanted to ask you about how Connecticut is. Or, you know, were you bummed about your Yankees or whatever. I know about you Now, if you're a new client, same thing.
It's, it's a, there you are. It's, you know, Mr. Ryan, you know, I, I was so excited that I saw that you've never been here before. I love working with new guests, new clients. Either way, it's, it's, you know, there you are. Right. It's the tail wagon, the dog. I love that.
Dan Ryan: Totally. And thinking about this, um, I was at, it's raining in New York City right now, it's just in line at B Fiar, Keith McNally restaurant, uh, waiting with a friend and [00:16:00] he's in the, the guy taking reservations in the weeds.
Uh, there's this woman who the reservation line isn't working. She's really upset. He's like, listen, I'm so sorry where this very popular restaurant, the, the lines are having cha challenges. Everyone wants to sit here. We only have so many tables. I'm so sorry. And, um, she went away. And then I came up and I was like, Hey, I just wanna say thank you for that explanation because I was trying to call too.
But hearing you say that in like a really caring way made me feel great. Um, or maybe understand what was going on. He's like, oh, come sit down. Yeah. And then he gave me this. He said, Hey, thank you for that. By the way, my name is Jordan and here's my cell phone number next time you wanna come. Cause I see you around like just texting.
But that's a soft skill. That's not. Talk, like how do you know or maybe it is.
John DiJulius: Um, and one of the, it should be, it absolutely should be. And there real quick, I think today it's the only time I know in the [00:17:00] world that every single industry is sharing the exact same two obstacles, staff shortages and supply chain issues.
Okay. Yeah. I, I, I don't know of anyone who's not affected by that. So more than ever, we need to manage expectations by being totally transparent. It's not oversharing and totally transparent looks like this is, is I, you know, is, is, um, Hey, listen, I, I, we're, uh, we're, uh, we're short. Some cooks in the kitchen or, or wherever we're.
We have a table for two. I just wanna let you know, we are not delivering the food at the time we normally are. You know, I want, and, and, and typically, like you just were, Hey dude, it's totally okay, right? As long as you keep the cocktails coming, I just wanna catch up with my old friend or my wife or, or whatever it is.
But there's people that don't say that, and I'm looking and saying, this is bullshit. It it, it's been, you know, 50 minutes [00:18:00] and, you know, I leave Matt and or supply chain issues that, you know, uh, you know, you place your order, it comes every Tuesday. You're telling your customer to be there on Tuesday. There, there whatever will be there.
And you open up the box, you pull it out and you can't find it. And then on the sheet it says out of order. Well, why didn't they let you know when you place the order? So you don't have, you know, you don't have customers mad at you. Um, so that's, you know, that's being transparent and, and managing customer expectations.
I think we would have a lot less customer rage if we, we, we were transparent on the front end.
Dan Ryan: I, I was taught by, uh, a mentor of mine that, you know, we're all big kids. We all have our own library card. Just tell us what the real story is. We can all handle it. Um, one of the, going back, you said a minute ago, you know, nope, we've lost sight of hospitality and delivering hospitality, but I can't.
I think a vast majority has. I still think there are people who do it. Well, you introduce the really awesome concept that I still don't [00:19:00] have, but one day I hope when I, when I get my bigger library card, I hope I have. But it's the idea of a chief customer officer or a CCO in the, in the, in the
John DiJulius: C-suite or a cxo, I'm sorry, cxo.
That's what it was. No, no. Do the same. It's CCO and CXO are, are, are both used. So how
Dan Ryan: many is, is, do you see that getting widely adopted
John DiJulius: now? Yeah, it's, it's the fastest growing C-suite position in corporate America. A Gartner just published. That 90% of companies have a cxo, which I, I, I, I have to, I can't find that.
Can't be, uh, they must be talking about Fortune 500 companies. I mean, you know, there's no way 90%, but, but they have a press release on it. They just don't say, you know, what, what market that is of any company opening the world or what niche or, or, you know, uh, you know, private, um, or public. But, uh, it is growing at [00:20:00] an incredible pace.
And we have a customer experience Executive Academy for that reason. Because if you wanna hire, promote a, you know, uh, an accountant, a cfo, well there's a, there was a degree in it. If you wanna, you know, control or operations or sales or marketing, well, you know, CMO you're hiring from with a, uh, a marketing degree.
There's no, I don't even know of a class. Wow. In, in, in school or Definitely not a master's degree on experience or service. So we've created kind of the, the first master's degree that sells out every year and people send to us, um, you know, that they come, they can also do it online, but they come to Cleveland four times a year, um, three days every quarter.
And you know, they, they get their master's degree and that is what, what is, uh, you know, why it's so popular. Cause people have no place to send their future or existing chief experience Officer. Can you [00:21:00]
Dan Ryan: give an example of someone who, who attended that and you had the, the biggest improvement from when they started to when they
John DiJulius: complet.
Yeah, we have so many. Um, but, but here, here's one with metrics. Okay. New Day usa, it's a veteran. Um, it, it's a mortgage company that only serves, uh, veterans of the military, right? Existing or, or past veterans. Um, and one of their issues was they had veterans, uh, their customer veterans who were already approved for a loan.
The hard part got approved for the loan, and then before the loan closed, 15% of them were opting out. Okay? So we have the ball almost at the goal line. We've done all the work. It's 35, 40 days, and Captain Smith. The last week says, screw it. I went somewhere else. Okay. We [00:22:00] found now the reason the account executive said was because they were finding cheaper rates somewhere else.
And, uh, you know, the, the, uh, chief experience officer from New Day, um, called bullshit and said That's not why. Okay. And, and here's another thing. They figured out every 1% of a vu, every 1% per month was worth $400,000. So I'll do the math. 15 times, 400,000 is a lot of money in revenue. A lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So you can see how critical it was. So they did discovery and research and found the number one reason why veterans were opting out was not because of. Was because the account executive started ghosting him. I had ask my son what ghost meant. Uh, that's wet replying weren't staying in touch. And what would happen is, right, I got, you know, uh, a private [00:23:00] Ryan, ah, funny movie thing.
Yeah. Private Ryan, he's approved. Okay, he's done. Basically I'm counting my commission on him and now I'm trying to get the other people in the pipeline approved or get rid of 'em. So I don't spend any more time and I'm working my pipeline and I'm not working my existing that, you know, have to close in the next 30 days.
So you're reaching out to me, you're saying, where's my appraisal? Where's my, you know, this, where's my that? And I'm not responding as quickly or at all, um, or I'm not, or I'm, I'm blindsided you by not telling you things are. And you get frustrated. You keep on shopping and you find a better company that you think, okay, so they built, put in a, um, a, a, um, I forget the term, but that the account executive has to, has to communicate with their existing veterans every five days or the loan shuts down.
So if, if I [00:24:00] don't call you or communicate with you and it's tracked in their system, the loan shuts down. Bells and sirens come off. The president know the vp coo, I mean, you don't want the loan getting shut down, right? As a result, now their monthly average is, uh, 8% still hot, but a 7% difference average every month, which is over two point some million in revenue.
Wow. So I, what I always say is, what's your view? You know, find out what your view is in your business. And, you know, make a mechanism that stops it from happening. And it's always disguised as price, right? So, oh, we're not retaining our customers because they're going and getting it somewhere else. Now that's not why you're not retaining your customers.
So
Dan Ryan: I love the idea of that tactical number between deals or af or your existing ones five times, right? There's these, these numbers. [00:25:00] Um, one of the things that I loved was you gave so many tactical activities to do to express gratitude to customers and connect with them in different ways. I think one was called 3, 2, 1, um, and then there were so many other ones, and I remember we've implemented the, a lot of these things and oftentimes it's like, oh, it's another thing to do.
But oftentimes in doing that and taking that pause and using the example of the veterans and just writing a thanking note or just connecting with them in some way, or sending a gift and having the. The people giving that actually enjoy that. It's a moment of pause, it's a moment of gratitude. Tell us a little bit
John DiJulius: about that.
Yeah, I love that, Dan, that you brought it up. While some may view it as another, you know, part of their job when they start doing it, the, the day maker, right? In any capacity, you pay for the guys, uh, toll behind you. You [00:26:00] know, let's say it's all, it's 50 cents for everyone. You say, pay for the next three people behind you, okay, behind me, and they've never met you.
They can't. Thank you. You're a genuine day maker. Who feels best at the end of the day, you do. Right? When, when. And so when we put our, our, our employees and we give 'em the autonomy and the freedom to be day makers and a day maker might be something so simple, sending you a follow up article about something we talked about that you don't ever remember mentioning to me it people who are running their first marathon.
Maybe you're running your first marathon or you're going to Maui for the first time. And I wanna make sure you know the best restaurants while you're there. You might forget that we, you even brought up that you were going, how does he know? Right? So we call him conversation gifts. There's a gift in every conversation if you're paying attention to it, right?
And then employees start going home feeling really good because they weren't just a, a hockey goalie, you know, reacting to request and yes, no five o'clock, you know, [00:27:00] 250, whatever that is. And they're able to look for the Ford gift. You remember Ford? Uh, refresh me. So Ford, what, what we train everyone on is when you're, uh, communicating with someone else, you have to try to learn their for family, family, occupation, recreation and dreams, family, occupation, recreation, and dreams.
So now that 3, 2, 1, which is, you know, I, I gotta send out, you know, three emails, two cards, one phone call. I don't care what communication you use, there's a lot of people my age that are all like, you gotta write cards, you gotta write a. I don't care if you freaking send it up in a smoke stack, if you telegram me the message, getting the message from you is more important than how, I don't care if you send me a video text saying, John, it was so great working with you.
I just went, that's cool. That makes my day. So I think we get too caught up in the channel. [00:28:00] I don't care if it's a Facebook message, I don't care if it's a LinkedIn message, but the 3, 2, 1 is you reach out basically to six clients per week pass. And again, and it's a non soliciting, you know, reason. So it's not like, Hey Dan, I think you wanna bring me back in or have me on my podcast.
Your podcast because I have another book or another presentation. It's not that it's not another reason, it's just like, Hey, Dan saw that your team saw that your alumni saw, or I was in Connecticut. It made me think. Um, and also, um, I just stumbled across or wrote a really good article that I think applies to what you do for the hotel industry.
I thought you'd enjoy it. That's it. It's not a solicitation, it's just, and it keeps me in front of you. So the next time you do need, or the next time someone tells you they need a customer experience guide, I'm the one you're not gonna say, oh, here's the top five. I've heard [00:29:00] what
Dan Ryan: I app. So I did so much of that as myself as I was building my business is I'm sure, or organically, but what I appreciated so much about the books that you rated, uh, that you wrote, and then the, all the tactical stuff that you shared with all of us in the room was basically systematizing so we could roll out to our teams and that, and I will say like the people who were most resistant to doing some of these things actually had the biggest, um, evolution within themselves because.
It is not no one, well, not no one, but very rarely do we all stop and express gratitude. And I It creates almost like a, a flywheel of good
John DiJulius: feeling. It does. It does. It does. I got, you know, new one I've picked up in the past year from reading a book on a Kindness by Adrian Banker, and she talks about it in her book and we've all done this, but she just talks about how it's a habit is sending, I call it the best relationship hack out there.
And she, hers is just sending you a video text and I'm like, yeah, I've done that before. [00:30:00] But the way she described it is she thinks before she texts. Okay. And it could be her significant other, it could be a coworker. It could be a client. Right. And hold on, I gotta text Dan. But hold on. Is this an opportunity?
Instead of a text, it'd be a video text. And she says this and it's totally true. It actually takes less time because I just clicked the video and say, Hey Dan, I just wanna take it tell you I really enjoyed today's thing. Y da da da. Have an awesome weekend. And when you text that, you know when spell check and all these things, you recorrect it.
And I'm telling you now, I do it all the time. Especially like I have a hun over a hundred employees and I used to text them on their anniversary and say, Dan, I wanna thank you. Congratulations on your fifth year anniversary, yada. You're the best. We're so glad. Yeah. I do it in a video now and I get you think I sent 'em a hundred dollars?
I get these, you know, hearts. And I shared this with my husband and it made me cry. And it's like really? Like I [00:31:00] can't believe. Yeah. Do you
Dan Ryan: know what the most incredible thing is? And you said at the beginning of that, it's the pause, that moment of thinking about what you're gonna give right. In this. That does more for the person I think giving it than the person receiving in many cases.
And it's literally a
John DiJulius: ten second pause. It is the day maker, I can't say this enough, is always the one that feels the best at the end of the night, more than the people's day he or she made. Right. Um, is you all, cause you go home and you, or at the end of the night you're like, I made a lot of people's day or moments today and that's a different job than I changed 250 rooms, beds, or, or had 10 clients or, you know, zoom calls or whatever.
That's a different, whole different, you know, uh, uh, paycheck. A hundred
Dan Ryan: percent. Um, so in doing all of this and, and all of the companies [00:32:00] and human beings of your employees and then all of your clients out there and customers, um, who are coming into the salons, um, What's the best exhibition of hospitality that you've seen outside of your world, but that has impact
John DiJulius: impacted others?
It really, um, I just think it's the relationship building and the focus on the moment and not the, the results. So, I don't know. You know, you're probably looking for a specific example. I could certainly think of a hundred, but my point is, or, or the precursor to this point is too many people, leaders, entrepreneurs think customer loyalty is, is about the results.
And the results means if I cook your steak medium rare like you requested, or I get your tooth to stop hurting as your dentist or, or I do your, you know, accounting or [00:33:00] you, you know, when you check in and you do get two beds instead of a king, whatever the re you request is. P Too many people think that's customer loyalty.
It's scientifically proven that has the least to do with customer loyalty is the results, the outcomes, unless we're talking about a heart surgery. Okay. But the outcome has the least to do. I expect at a fine restaurant, at a fine hotel or any dentist with a degree, I, I know they're gonna, you know, they better give me the, the steak, how I cooked it or stop my tooth from hurting, right?
If that's all I get, it's not cuss, you know, I'm not gonna be loyal. Cause I know any one of their competitors are gonna do the same. And when I say competitors, if I'm talking about fine dining, fine hotel, right? I'm talking about fine competitors, not any, you know, shackle. Um, but here's where customer loyalty is, and I know, you know, this is, it's in the micro moments.
And the micro moments is when I called. When I went on your [00:34:00] website, when I checked in, when I check passed someone in the, the, the, the lobby or, uh, on my floor that worked for you. And I said, Hey, can you tell me where? And they, you know, took me there even though they were in housekeeping, even though they were an engineer or they responded with, I work in housekeeping.
I work in in in engineer. You have to go to the lobby for that. Right. That's the negative. The positive is Absolutely. And they escort me to the conference convention center of their hotel. Right. It's the micro moments of how they made me feel when I checked in. They noticed when they were, you know, asked me for my ID that I was from Cleveland and they asked me how Cleveland was this time of year or they welcome me back.
Um, because their, their system told them I had been there before. Or they say, I understand this is your first time at our property. Right? And, and, and those little things. So, uh, you know, you're probably looking for specific, but [00:35:00] we focus on, I
Dan Ryan: don't think, I mean the specifics great, but to me, that idea of micro moments, okay?
So many hotels will be like, say the, say the guest name three times as they check in. Like, that's so prescriptive and it's kind of crap, right? But like, when you're pausing for a moment to write that thank you note, or you're pausing to do that video or that micro moment, if you're pausing for a moment, I'm saying your name three times, but I'm asking you how Cleveland is it.
But I, it's something about that connection to heart. Yeah, connecting with the other and being that day maker. I just interviewed a guy who, um, uh, rode across the ocean three times the Atlantic, twice the Pacific once
John DiJulius: and he, and so you have me following him? Uh, yeah, you're following him. But I, I, I rode my Peloton for like 20 minutes today.
Oh, right. We'll have to do a,
Dan Ryan: we'll have to do a team ride one of these days. . Um, but. [00:36:00] There's no luxury, there's no comfort. They're going two hours on, two hours off. Right. But they create, he created this idea. He also does leadership coaching, but this idea of, of, he calls them gathering points, right? It's that pause, um, where they would have breakfast or coffee and just truly connect and then go back about like, really, yeah.
Oars. Um, but it, when you take those moments and become a day maker yourself, make someone else's day, um, in all of these conversations, I'm happening, it improve, it's that one plus one equals three. The, the whole becomes much greater than, than the sum of the parts. So in your quest of building your salon business, which put you on this path, how did you figure out that this was
John DiJulius: your calling, though?
You know, a again, it was out of, uh, survival. So when we, I, when we opened, Uh, like any big city and, and times just by a hundred in New York and Boston and all those Cleveland's, you know, not, not on on [00:37:00] those levels, but where we open, you could, if you had a bad arm, you could throw a rock in any direction and hit five salons.
So how are we gonna open? We have the three no's. We had no money, no employees, and no customers, all right? Besides my wife at the time and, and, and me who was, you know, still driving a truck for UPS during the day and, you know, answering phones and doing the books at night. You know, our first year, how are we gonna compete with these existing salons that all offer the exact same services?
Hair nail, spa. That have prettier buildings right now, have deeper pockets to advertise. Back then there wasn't, you know, the social media, but, you know, whatever, it's a billboard or a newspaper ad or a magazine ad or you know, on your, on your, when you went to the grocery store, it might be in your, your cart.
Those were all the things back in the early nineties. We would, you know, how we advertise or the Yellow Pages, right? [00:38:00] We couldn't, we couldn't compete with 'em there, we couldn't out build a prettier place and we couldn't offer a service that they didn't offer. Oh, we do highlights. Well, so do they. Well, we do waxing, so do they.
Right. And at the end of the day, there's only so straight and kind of straight line. Right? And I'd love to tell you our $130 Bob is straighter than the three salons in our shopping. So to charge $25. But here's the difference. That salon, that charges $25 or less for that Bob. It's, it's a straight haircut.
All right. And our, our speak, um, you can get your pick of an appointment today with them. Our hairdressers that charge over a hundred dollars to 150, you have to wait three weeks or three months for their first opening. It's not the bob, it's not how straight we can cut a straight line. Right? It's not the bad and alarm clock and, and TV and high definition TV and the thousand Quill, whatever.
I'm trying to speak, you know, the, the, the restaurant [00:39:00] language, right? Or that you have a coffee shop and a nice restaurant and a, you know, a grab and go like in a pool, right? Everyone has that. All your competitors have that, but they don't have the experience, they don't have the relationship. They don't have the 19 year old, like at Chick-fil-A, who is saying, certainly my pleasure versus No problem.
Or, you know, whatever the, the street slang term. Um, they're focused and they're allowed and they're trained to see that you have your arm in a sling. You're at Chick-fil-A, you just ordered a ton of stuff and I'm giving it to you on a tray and you're not gonna be able to carry it to your room. Your, your, your thing.
Cause your arm, you just had a shoulder surgery. I'm, I'm supposed to pay attention to that. Jump off from behind the counter and bring it to your table. Open your ketchup packets for you because you can't one hand it, right? It's training those employees when they overhear someone checking in and saying, oh, shoot honey, I forgot my whatever.[00:40:00]
That, that shows up in their room in 30 minutes. They're Advil, their readers, whatever that may be. It's focusing on seeing and hearing those moments instead of just being transactional. Uh, credit card and, and Id Right initial here, the data departure and uh, you know, your room rate. That's a transactional.
But the experiential side, the hospitality side is those little innocuous things that come up. But employees have to feel empowered that they're allowed to, and they'll be celebrated, not gotten in trouble for spending in an extra $5 on a guest when she checked in. And that
Dan Ryan: comes back to those micro moments,
John DiJulius: right?
It's all the micro moments and a a, a lot of great micro moments add up to a great experience, but the experience is kind of the results, uh, and, and outcome of the micro moments along the way. It's not just [00:41:00] that you drop my, my dinner and I cut into it and it's, it's a shade of pink that I like. So in all of the,
Dan Ryan: with your legions of, of followers and people that you've impact impacted through education, like you send 'em on your, on their way.
And they're ch they're impacting others. How do you make yourself feel comfortable and cared for?
John DiJulius: I make myself feel comfortable and cared for. It's the people I surround. I mean like, um, , I'm gonna show you something. Let me grab it. This is my, uh, my mother told me when I was a kid to surround myself with brilliant people.
So I maybe would be guilty by association cause I wasn't the smartest kid. So you probably can't see this, but this is my grade school transcripts and this line right here, first grade to eighth, my average grade is [00:42:00] F f D, and I peaked in fourth grade with a d plus average. I was requested to repeat every grade from first through 12th.
I didn't, but I was requested, flunked out of college, right? And, and, and so the whole point of this is the people that I work with in all four of my brands, I spend most of the time under the Julius Group, but I also have a Believe in Dreams, which is a nonprofit. And I started the salons. They're the, the most amazing people.
And I truly, truly, when I say this and, and, and if, if, if you, if you ask me about, let's say you knew 25 different employees, or you could hear me talk to 20 different customers, say, oh, I know Nicole, or I know Denise, or I know that my answer is always to say, oh my God, I love. And you'd say, you know, John, you say that.
I genuinely believe that. I don't know every employee okay anymore, especially in the salons. But the employees I know [00:43:00] and the employees I work with, I like honestly love. If you want your employees to love you, you gotta love them first. And I just think they're so, I like, it blows my mind that they work for me and they commit their careers to my vision when they have so many opportunities out there and some look better on paper.
They certainly, in some cases could get a higher paying job somewhere else, but they're thinking long term and all this. And I, but I even love, like their spouses, like, I know it sounds silly, just is this young consultant for us now, she's 31, but like when she started, when she was 26, right out of her master's degree, you know, I just can't believe how much she's grown and, and how brilliant she is.
50 and six year old CEOs. Right? And like, I was scared that they, she, she'd get eaten. I love her. I love her. But you know, what I love more is her husband. He's my cornhole partner. Whenever we have, you know, get togethers, like, like, are you bringing Ryan? And I always joke, I'm like, you're not invited unless Ryan's coming.
But you get to [00:44:00] know people, you get to know their families, you get to know their kids, and you know, so some people that that'll sound like, you know, well, that you're not gonna have that. So they energize me and, and they keep me up at night. It's the only thing that keeps me up at night. Cause I wanna make sure that, um, I am rewarding their choice to work for me, um, every day.
You know, and that, that, that, that, that today, and this is, this is our, our, our leadership mission to our employees. Okay, let me see if I say it right. And we say it in hiring, orientation and ongoing. We hope. That you make more money here than you ever thought you possible. However, at the end of your career, we want the money you made to be the least valuable thing you got from working here.
That's our goal and mission is you to say, yes, after [00:45:00] 10, 20, 30 years, I made more money than I thought I was going to in my life. But that's sixth or ninth of the thing you got from working with us. Right. And that you're a better person, parent, friend, and you, you know? And, and it was a rewarding career.
And that's hard. That's hard. That's not a, you know, that's not just something you say and walk away from it. You gotta back that up. Cuz every day you could be saying, Hey, oh yeah, John. Oh yeah. You know, on any of that. So I know we went down a rabbit hole. Hopefully that was No, this is per, this
Dan Ryan: is perfect because, okay.
Um, in thinking back to when you were speaking to all of us and then the books that I've read of yours and then the things that I, the teams have implemented, what I found is, okay, yeah. Pay and money is really important to everyone cuz like, we all have to live and do this, but it's also finding those micro moments as a team where we deliver so much more value and [00:46:00] feeling and love and to just everyone.
And I, I feel like it's our job to make those who work with us better versions of themselves. By the time that they leave. Hopefully they never leave. Um, but when they do, I, I want everyone to just be a better version of themselves. And I think a hundred percent that, that mentality that you're taking from your whole team and that true love that you have for everyone.
It, it, it, it pays such dividends, not just if for your business, but for, for everyone, for their families, for their communities. And that's, that's amazing. And I feel like it is
John DiJulius: missing. Well, and that's our definition. I mean, like, we have a definition for the customer service revolution, right? And it is a radical overthrow of conventional business mentality design to transform what employees and customers experience.
Now, this next part is what we're talking about. This shift permeates into people's lives, at work, [00:47:00] at home, in their personal lives and in the community. Like that's the part that really, you know, excites me because if I could teach a 19 year old or a 24 year old, how to better serve and deliver genuine hospitality and genuinely care for the other person.
That isn't just stayed at at work, they now go home and do that for their sister and brother and the, and Fred, and the best compliment I ever get is when I meet someone's parents and they, you know, find out that your daughter works at, you know, one of my businesses and they say, I don't know what you did to my son or daughter, but she is not the same person she was six months ago or a year ago.
That is, that is the biggest check you could write me. That, that they're seeing a difference in that, you know, best version of themselves as a result of, of working with us. And I'm not doing that. That's not me, that's my employees. It's our training people executing it. My day to day [00:48:00] impact, um, you know, you know, you know, to, to anyone is, is long gone.
And I don't, I can't take credit for that, but my people do. Yeah. It's
Dan Ryan: like you've planted an orchard, right. Yeah. Yeah. And nurtured all of that. So you shared what's, what's keeping you up at night and you know, also going back to when you said like this idea of delivering hospitality is pretty much gone.
I, I believe it's not fully gone. I know you agree with that as well, cuz there are little beacons
John DiJulius: of No. And that's my, my latest book, and this is to plug it is the relationship economy. And that's because the pendulum has swung so far over to high tech, no touch that I believe that it's coming back now because we are all starving to be a name with Ford and feeling valued and being treated with hospitality.
And that feeling that, you [00:49:00] know, the few that focus on that are growing and you know, it's people, um, you know, people say, what do you want? You know, what, what type of client do you want? And I rattle it off. Okay. I want a Tesla driving, Peloton, riding Lululemon, wearing Starbucks, drinking apple using customer.
Okay. That's, wait,
Dan Ryan: I think you just, I think you just, uh, got my demographic right. Right. I'm not wearing Lulu Lemon though. I hear the pants are good for.
John DiJulius: The shirts. They're not great for dad bods. They really do show our imperfections, but they're so damn comfortable. And I like their, their pullovers because they, they, they don't show my, uh, my dad bod. But anyway. Anyway, so the next question is, oh, good. I, I'd like that client too. Okay. We all would. What do you have to do to get them?
How do you attract them? Not by running discounts. Those people aren't looking for discounts. They're looking for an emotional [00:50:00] affirmation that says by being a, any one of the driving at a Tesla, or, you know, drinking a Starbucks or Lululemon or p that that says something about me, right? That says that I'm cool, I'm hip, I'm trendy, I'm sexier.
That's, you know, and how do you get there By, by creating that emotional affirmation. And a lot goes into that, that basically all the micro experiences at moments we've been talking about. Um, it's not just by being the lowest bidder and you know, oh, you pay what? Or I'll give you, you. 10% less if you know, would you come over to me?
Some things you will that are commodity, some things you don't even compare. If you're a Tesla, you're buying the next Tesla, you're buying the next iPhone 27 when it comes out. You're not seeing if Samsung or the Galaxy or the gu, I don't even know what the competition is, what they're charging for their new Yeah, you're you're, you're going with it.
I'm, I'm, you know, as soon as the MacBook Pro came out, I ordered it. You know, I'm not looking to see what [00:51:00] Dell and anyone else are, or, you know, has
Dan Ryan: I Gotcha. Um, so go going with that and that need and that
John DiJulius: thirst. How far have I taken you off your course? No, this is,
Dan Ryan: we we're right on it. Because what I wanna know from you is, you know, you have that thirst, that excitement that we've all been starved from.
Just to reflect back what I heard you say. Yes. What's exciting you most about the future?
John DiJulius: You know, the merging of the companies that are merging. Uh, technology with the human and, and that's the secret. I love technology. I love that I could go on the apple and book my appointment with the genius within 60 seconds.
Literally the thought of calling someone and having to do that, it just would, sounds so painful. Uh, it sounds like it would take 30 minutes, it might take five, but today, five minutes is what used to be 30 minutes, right? But I could literally have my appointments at [00:52:00] my Apple store and then in 60 seconds whenever, you know, my schedule and their schedule works.
But you can get to that. But then I get to talk to, um, a genius and tell him what's wrong and, you know, bore him with you don't understand. I travel and speak and present and I can't have this happening. And he fixes it right there, right? And I get the human experience and the human expertise when I need it.
And I get the mundane, trivial thing that, you know, I, I, I, I, I, I, uh, self-service can do. So it, it, it's, it's blending those things. And I think the real
Dan Ryan: challenge, especially in hotels also, like they're talking about robots and less people working in it, and keyless entry and just keyless check-in. Um, I feel like right now we're at this place where there's an overcorrection to technology to to account for the loss of human capital, but I feel like it's gonna swing back.
Maybe not all the way, but I, I feel like we haven't really figured out that sweet spot yet.
John DiJulius: And, and you don't. But, but here, Dan, to your point and [00:53:00] tell me if this exists, this is what I want. Cause I'm in a hotel three times a week. Um, luckily, knock on wood, since Labor day. Uh, and so I'm not complaining.
I'm not complaining. You know, two years ago I'd be complaining, I'm traveling too much. I'm so happy I'm traveling, right, that it's back. But here is my dream for hotels to shop in online, which I know some of this exists. Bypass the whole front desk, get outta my Uber and say, you know, it tells me I'm in room two 12 and I can open it with my, my, my app.
Um, but even better, I want the room at 69 degrees and p like, like that is my fantasy. And maybe I'm lame that that's my fantasy, but I wanna walk into a little bit of a chill. That's me. You might want it toastier. And one of my biggest is when I have to pick up that damn remote. We're in a completely new television guide [00:54:00] and, and find where ESPN is, and it might be six or it might be 400 and you know, how cool would that be if that, now that stuff, that's great.
I want that, but then I also want someone that I can talk to about which restaurant I wanna go to and oh, understand. Again, boring the person. I am gluten free and I don't do starch and I don't, but that's where I want, you know what, based on that, you know, you would love, like, I want that, right? I don't want that on a frequently asked question, kios, uh, chat bot.
So I want the flexibility of the mundane tasks that'll speed up my experience. And then the, you know, interactive things that, that I'm looking for. So
Dan Ryan: here's something as you're saying that I feel like that is not far away.
John DiJulius: They're missing It sure isn't.
Dan Ryan: But you, one of the other things I remember you speaking about was, I, I, and I can't remember, it was like, policies suck.
Guidelines [00:55:00] are great, or policies are,
John DiJulius: are don't, is it, don't say, don't use the word policy. You can have policy. Don't use 'em with your staff and customers. And if you want me to explain, but, okay. So
Dan Ryan: in that vein, um, there's a challenge, right? Because many people will book their hotels, or few people book directly through the Marriott.
Right. The ihg, the Hilton app, right? When you do that, they have more information, you get better rooms. But I find that the hotels are really messing up right now because whoever books through an OTA or an online travel agent, so from an Expedia to a hotel tonight to a whatever, they get the second floor room in the dark corner, and they're not doing any of that stuff that you talked about.
How do you think you can bridge that? Because those are pe, those are customers too, and I feel like whenever they put people on the dark room on the second floor next to the elevator, they're missing an opportunity to, to impact and, and develop a raving fan,
John DiJulius: right? And, and [00:56:00] so there's a great quote or or mantra that, you know, it's mostly when we use third party, okay, let's go to my world.
Uh, you order a hundred books, I ship them to you. Okay? You call me up and say, John, they didn't, uh, show up. Well, Dan, I, I, I sent them second day error with ups like you told me you needed, here's the tracking number, and you go figure out with ups. Right? Not, it's not my fault. Right. You ordered them on Monday.
I sent 'em out on Monday, second air, like you asked, but the problem is, well, it's not my fault. It is my problem. Right. And, and we do that anytime there's a third party that you booked, you know, through a third party app or you know, using a ship. There's so many examples of third party, right? Third party, our fault.
It's not my fault at Disney, your son is too short to get on this ride, but it is my problem, right? Because, you know, you are gonna go home and, and your [00:57:00] kid's gonna be upset and, and he's gonna scream and have a melt on right there, which, you know, you don't want and you're not gonna remember Disney as well.
So they take ownership, well, they can't let him on for safety. They give him a a card. They say, you know, what's your name? Billy? Billy. I'm giving you this card that says the next time you'll probably be tall enough for this ride. If you are, this card is a line jump. You get to walk by everyone, but hand this and you go on the next ride.
And now Billy's happy and Billy's actually bugging, you know, mommy and daddy, when can we go back? When can we go back? Instead of us all remembering how hot it was, every line was over an hour long and we couldn't get outta half the rides and we spent 5,000. Right. You know, so we gotta take ownership that, you know, that's still our customer.
You know, even though I booked an Expedia or wherever I travelosity, it's, it's about the Marriot experience. And I, I'm, and, and I'm blaming Marriott for everything that good or bad [00:58:00] happens to me. And so they have to find how they can own that.
Dan Ryan: Yeah, I just feel like that part seems very far away. And that's a whole other conversation that I don't know how to talk about.
But, you know, you talked about Billy and giving him the card where in the future he can jump the line. Go back to, um, the fourth grade, John, where you're D d d F. You're being told you're gonna be left
John DiJulius: at F at f fd. Come on man. I gonna make a little
Dan Ryan: was I was giving you too much hair. Go back to that John.
Um, how did you, did you feel shame when, when that was happening?
John DiJulius: I'm sure I did. Uh, I was, you know, I was literally, I was just thinking about this the other day. I was literally a good three years, maybe more physically, emotionally, maturity, um, behind, like, I was so small. You could have held me back three years or put me back three years and I still would've been a smallest in that [00:59:00] class.
Right. So I had, you know, my, my, my. I lost my dad when I was six. Okay. Now that was bait. I wanna just say, oh, I'm sorry. Say, oh, I'm sorry. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry to hear something. Okay. No, no, no. That's not what I mean. He didn't die. We literally lost him. Okay. He left us, couldn't find him anywhere. Right. So that's, that's kind of my joke there, but it is.
That's true. Right. But I do, I say I lost my dad and usually people say, no, no, no. He didn't die. He left us. Right. So I had a, you know, a mom that, that, you know, was raising six kids all under the age of, you know, 20. And I was the youngest at six. So, you know, I didn't have a mom at home cuz she was, you know, had to go, you know, worked full-time, which, you know, raising six kids back in the, you know, sixties and, and, and seventies was a full time.
It's the hardest job you could have. Well, so I didn't have any accountability. I had a D L d I was like, you know, all over the place. And, [01:00:00] you know, so, uh, but I had a mom that believed in me and she told me that every day she told me. She goes, so when I didn't make, you know, make the grade or make the team or, you know, lost my job, you know, and or, or the police stopped by, all those things happened, okay.
She'd always stick up for me and say, you know, you're gonna make it, I believe in you. And, and, and everyone's heard that from someone and we have to remember who it was. Um, because, you know, that got me through and people didn't think my mom was being tough enough on me. And like, listen Mrs. De, you need to No, no, no.
He's going to is just fine. Right. You know, I, I, I I have no confidence. And they think, oh God, you know, her son is, is gonna be in jail or, or, you know, not doing good things when he is an adult. And I never did bad things. It was mischievous. It wasn't anything bad. But obviously I, I never looked like I was gonna be successful in, in whatever that term looks like.
But my mom just gave [01:01:00] me that gift and it gave me this incredible, um, I dunno, self-esteem and, and self-esteem. I shouldn't have had, uh, there's no reason for it, but she gave it to me and I just had this kinda cocky chip on my shoulder that I'm, I'm gonna do it. Right. And, and, and you know, fortunately it worked out.
Dan Ryan: If you could go back to that fourth grade, John, as the John of today, what advice would you give yourself?
John DiJulius: Um, You know, it's hard cuz cuz a lot of things I, you know, I'd say, you know, not to take things such so seriously, not to worry, you know, because you didn't make the team today or because she doesn't like you or, you know, you asked her out or, you know, you weren't invited to the cool kids parties.
Um, that's okay. Like, that's so okay. Um, you know, but, um, you know, I think all the times, like, like I wouldn't wanna talk myself out of failure because all those mistakes [01:02:00] made me who I am and avoided me failing when it really would pouch later on. Like, so that little mistake maybe I made when we first opened my business.
If, if, if you would've, you know, told me not to do that, and I would then I might have made it when it was a million dollar deal instead of a, a 10,000 deal. Right. So, I don't know, it's really hard. I think just, you know, the biggest one thing that that does haunt me is it, haunt me is a strong word. But one thing I would change, um, and I say this when I speak at kids to Schools, is I got picked up, I wouldn't say bullied, right?
But I got picked up. I was little, I was obnoxious, I couldn't shut up and I got bad grades, you know, and all those things. So, so kids would pick on me and 99% of the time I deserved, right? Cause of my mouth and just, you know, whatever. But what I did, and this was probably a normal thing, is that I pick on the people below.
Because it made me [01:03:00] feel good or it made me, I don't know why. I don't know why, but you know, that shit kind of rolls downhill. And I don't know if that's a normal thing, but I look back and that's my only regret in life that I made fun of, you know, Carmella, right? Cause she was, you know, five, nine in fourth grade.
And to us, that was a giraffe. Now we're kicking ourselves later on because she was a fricking model. Um, you know, but, you know, we didn't realize it in fourth grade. She was just, you know, you'd see her coming down the hallway, you know, uh, you know, a foot taller than everyone else. So it was just, you know, in whatever aspect I was high school or college, I'd always, you know, shit on the person below me, you know?
So, you know, I felt a little better about myself and that's probably my, my one thing that, you know, damn, I wish I could go back and not do that. And I try to teach that to my kids and say, invite the least favorite kid to your birthday party. Like, you have no idea what that would mean to him. Oh my God, I got invited to Bo de Julius's birthday party.
Um, you know, [01:04:00] I, I try to teach my kids that hopefully, um, they do less of it. They certainly aren't, you know, on the, you know, where I was like, they're not, you know, the unpopular kid like I was when I was in school. Well, whatever. Haun therapy. That was all therapy there. Yeah. No, I
Dan Ryan: love it. And I, I'll say like, whatever, um, haunting you may feel, I feel like all of the work and the soapbox that you're on about giving to others and creating these micro moments and just living in this world of gratitude and appreciation, um, I can speak for myself and the 65 other entrepreneurs from around the world in that room and countless other, uh, groups that you've spoken to over the years.
I think that the work that you've done as far as on a balance sheet from that time when you were in fourth grade, far outweighs that. And I mean, I believe in you and the things that you've done, I've enacted and I believe in them. And I just wanna say thank you.
John DiJulius: Thank you. That, that, that means a [01:05:00] lot to me, Dan.
Well,
Dan Ryan: uh, all the, all the, all of your work means so much to me. Um, just so, like, as we wrap this out, how, John, how can people get in touch with you?
John DiJulius: Um, yeah, if you're gonna put it in the show notes or anything, but I'll put it in the show notes. Yeah, for sure. Uh, the d Julius group, um, the th e excuse me. D i j u l i u s group, g o u p.com, or John vd julius group dot.
Dan Ryan: And then also if you, if you guys are on Amazon, type in John de Julius and check out all of his books. They're amazing reads and not just reads like, you actually do stuff. It's incredible. So John, again, I just want to say thank you very much for your time. My
John DiJulius: pleasure. It was a, a, a privilege to be on it.
I can't believe how fast the time went. I know,
Dan Ryan: I know. And also, most importantly also, I want to take a micro moment here and I wanna express gratitude and thanks to my, to my listeners. And if this has changed any way that you [01:06:00] experience or give hospitality or change the way you think about things, please share the podcast with someone else.
Um, I'll see you next time.