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Begin Again is for people in the second half of life who sense that the identity they've been carrying no longer fits. Host Winston Faircloth — spiritual director, daily poet, and fellow traveler — brings honest conversation, personal story, and original poetry to the journey of remembering, releasing, and returning to who God created you to be. Visit www.myreuniontour.com for more resources.
Hey there. It's Winston Faircloth, and welcome to episode 56 of the begin again leadership podcast. Hey, the feedback over our recent ReFIREment podcast series was off the hook. So over the next few episodes, we're gonna go a little deeper into each of the four phases of the refinement process. And if looking back over the last six months is any indication, we've learned quite a few lessons from 2020, and that is we're gonna face opposition.
Winston Faircloth:And how we handle these changes and these challenges determines our destiny. Now perhaps you're in this season feeling overwhelmed, lost, maybe just worn out, you're missing that spark, that fire you had at the beginning of the year. And I definitely hit that wall myself a few months ago. And refinements the process I use to help me rediscover my passion, my fire. And you know, today people tell me how peaceful surrendered even younger that I look.
Winston Faircloth:And this journey begins from within. So this four part series is going to give you help you gain your passion back after a season of setbacks. And the four steps just to remind you are last time we talked about unplug, which is disconnecting from external sources temporarily. Today we're going to talk about UNLEARN, which is reevaluating and challenging existing ideas, beliefs and concepts. Next time, we're going to talk about rest, experimenting with and understanding ways to deepen your rest.
Winston Faircloth:And then the final step is relearn incorporating new practices and beliefs to set you on a new path. So today, let's go deeper into step two, UNLEARN. As a college student, I gravitated towards Western philosophy during another time of significant economic and political upheaval. Hey, truth be told, it was the second major for me because of the cool professors and hanging out at the deli. Sometimes even during class, We studied Plato, Socrates, Descartes, many of the classics along with contemporary philosophers.
Winston Faircloth:And out of the dozens and dozens of works that I studied, one phrase haunted me then and still challenges me today. And it comes from Plato's work Apology, where he paraphrased to see his teacher Socrates. Plato relates that Socrates says that his seemingly wise countenance, why he's wiser than any other person is because he cannot imagine that he knows what he doesn't not know. So here's the quote that used to just bang around in my brain all the time. I neither know nor think that I know.
Winston Faircloth:That's the sign of a wise person. Well, you know, today, there's all kinds of internet quotes, Instagram quotes, internet themes, internet memes that have morphed into to this quote, I'm the wisest man alive for I know one thing, and that is that I know nothing. And that's the paraphrase that I just hung on to all of these years. And whatever the exact quote, the sentiment behind this takes my breath away every time I hear it. And more importantly, every time I seek to apply it in my own life.
Winston Faircloth:That wisdom comes from knowing that you know nothing. Let me just settle into that for a moment. Wisdom comes from knowing that you really know nothing. How countercultural, and more importantly, counterintuitive is that statement in today's world? And, you know, truthfully, this is probably one of the single most important reasons to unplug from social media during this season, where everyone has an opinion, a conspiracy, or an axe to grind, that can and will post with absolute conviction and certainty.
Winston Faircloth:And unfortunately, which will be shared, reposted, retweeted and amplified to an increasingly larger yet smaller minded echo chamber of like minded followers. Unplugging goodness is so important so that you can actually take a step back and evaluate what you know. And do you really, really know? Unplug is an invitation to curate your connections. And in so doing, give you that fire break so that you can go to this next step, which is unlearn.
Winston Faircloth:And now that you've successfully taken on a season of unplugging, you have the space to reconsider some of the things that you've been told, some of the things that you believe. And if you're willing to go deeper, this can be incredibly freeing process for you. So since we're in the philosophy zone today, let's go to Euripides, a Greek poet who once said question everything, learn something. Wise words indeed. You know, so in my own experience during this season, I needed a break in business from all of the coaches, mentors and courses to discern and evaluate what pieces, parts of what they were teaching felt genuinely connected to my spirit.
Winston Faircloth:You know, what's ruthlessly true in this marketplace that we're in today is you can't be a copy, you can't be a clone of anyone else. We have to be ourselves, authentically true to who we are, and our experiences in order to be most useful to others. And another course may not be the magic bullet that you're looking for. This season of unlearning gives you a discerning heart and an investigator's mind, which ultimately are the best combination to help us navigate conflicting and confusing advice, which is available all across the interwebs. So a personal example, tangible example from this recent UNLEARN experience is my health coach, who swears that good health is not all about the food.
Winston Faircloth:And over the last six months of working with her, we focused on unlearning five decades of beliefs that I've held about diet plans, nutrition and exercise. Now most people who've struggled with weight over their lives own dozens and dozens of nutritional books, diets, guides, exercise tapes, programs, processes, maybe even have had and sold and bought exercise equipment, many, many gym memberships, many, many doctors visits, many, many programs they've been part of. Why has success eluded them? Well, my coach is really helping me avoid the the hot trendy fad of the week or the month or the quarter of the year, and bringing me back to basics, starting with sleep. And by helping me look at small incremental habits that fundamentally help me pay attention, aka using the words of today mindfulness about the food, and the process and the rest and the exercise that I'm taking in helping me to be present and accountable and just appreciative of taking care of my body in new and loving ways.
Winston Faircloth:Now each of these new habits have taken several tries and often several weeks to become more natural and more habitual. Isn't it crazy how we have been conditioned to believe certain things that will get certain results. I hear it all the time, even people I really admire, keep pointing to this trend or that trend. And ultimately, I think that this health journey for me is going to come down to my new favorite four letter word, love. And my second favorite four letter word, which is rest.
Winston Faircloth:And that's going to lead into our next step in the refinement process, rest. Now once you've unplugged and you begin the process of unlearning, and by the way, I think that is an ongoing process. It is not something that's going to come easily or naturally and something that most people even welcome, you're going to need a rested and rejuvenated mind, which only comes from a dedication to finding better rest. And like everything else worth having in life, this comes with focus and intentionality. And we'll cover my experience and favorite resources about rest next time.
Winston Faircloth:But let's come back to unlearning. Are you willing to push yourself harder to reevaluate everything that you've been told? And, you know, maybe that sounds too daunting. Why don't we break it down to something more important? If you're not getting the results that you want in business, why is that?
Winston Faircloth:Are you following somebody else's formula and it's not working for you? That's, you know, that's been my experience. We have to be on a quest. It's great to get information and education and coaching and mentoring. I am all for it.
Winston Faircloth:I'm a big believer in it. I invest in it all the time. But we have to have discernment. We have to have, a critical eye to look at what's being proposed, appreciate how it's influenced the teacher, the person who's providing it their life and their business, but then look at us, look inside for what really feels genuinely a great fit for you. And when you do that, you have what in business what's called alignment.
Winston Faircloth:Alignment builds confidence, confidence builds community, and community gives you the opportunity to connect with the people that you are destined to serve. And it's not gonna necessarily look like my mentor's business. It's not necessarily going to look like the the top level course creators business or service. But they were gifted in different ways, and they have different life experiences. So what feels good and natural to you?
Winston Faircloth:This is really important. And the only way you get to it is by challenging everything. And not just looking at something from a surface perspective and says, hey, it worked for Susie. It'll work for me. No.
Winston Faircloth:That's not been my experience over the decades. Most things that have come easily and naturally to me have been a really good fit. So if you feel like you keep pushing doors and trying to open doors that are locked or break open a door that's closed, this is a great time to UNLEARN. Unlearn what you think you know, and take on what feels really good. It feels really settled in your soul.
Winston Faircloth:So next time we'll talk about rest, which is the third part of this big process. And each of these steps builds upon the other. You have to unplug first so that you can kind of disconnect from the chatter so that now you can take a step back and unlearn. But the best way to unlearn is to be rested. And in that process, it was really the next big key to helping me unlock that fire and passion that I've been seeking for so long.
Winston Faircloth:So as a reminder, these are wrap up episodes for season number one of the begin again podcast. And beginning with episode 60. We have a special surprise for you that we've been hinting about for weeks now. How to focus your business using a multiplier of your mission. This is something that every business owner wants or needs, namely sourcing, building and growing a team you love, so that you can multiply your margin, your income, and your impact.
Winston Faircloth:And we have the wonderful, amazing opportunity to interview one of my favorite CEOs who's gonna help us kick off season number two of the podcast, who really embodies the spirit of for love of team as our very first guest of season number two, and it's coming up in just a few weeks on episode 60. So so that you don't miss that or the next two steps in the refinement process, make sure to subscribe an Apple podcast or any of your favorite podcast players so you don't miss a single episode. And make sure to check out the show notes for a special thank you for when you leave a heartfelt review on Apple or any of your favorite podcast players we have we have a special gift to send you as our way of saying thanks for helping us spread the word about this podcast. And finally, as we've shared on every episode, remember the biggest breakthroughs in life and business occur the moment you decide to begin again. I'll catch you on the next episode.