Split Decisions

The caves on the far side of the ferry fold in on themselves. A kind old man at a cottage door turns out to be the tongue of a mimic. A room of disembodied hands demands their darkest secrets. Somewhere in the bends, the crew gets separated from the army marching behind them.

Website: https://www.narrativedeclaration.com
System: Pathfinder Second Edition

Click here to watch a video of this episode.

What is Rotgoons - Narrative Declaration?

By the Narrative Declaration TTRPG group: Four adventures try to make it big within the decrepit streets of Outset's Pawn Pilaster. Catch this comedic but grim dark Pathfinder Second Edition TTRPG adventure and watch them all suffer!

oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
are we all ready to play
some raccoons
I just want to hang out in here and talk
no
fuck you subs dice
I love
hanging out here you're a grown ass woman
roll the dice
we're playing rockers right now
whenever stays gone
ah there's dice
oh
where's my nervous avatar
where did I go hello
oh
grey
I have a feeling about the stream
she's sneaking
let me refresh on my side I guess
uh
click
maybe
possibly
she's in the
she's in the pink
I am
what
what happened to her
I'm dead I guess
the bit went too far
dude YouTube got her
I guess rejoin
on your end
rejoin okay
she's right there though
she's right there though
while she figures that out
like it's weird on how it connects
yeah
what the fuck
you successfully shot the dog
congratulations
hi chat
wow
see it works
it's funny because hyenas are closer to cats
in the animal kingdom
correct
hi chat
correct
hi chat welcome to another exciting episode of raccoons
uh
we are
we're getting to the end of it
we're getting to the end of it
wait yeah
you didn't start
you didn't start the right way
what do you mean I didn't start the right way
whenever we start you guys
everybody ready for another episode of raccoons
and then everyone goes
no you guys go
like I don't really sit there quiet
that's why I went ooh
that's why you should be the one doing it this time
no
just you
just you
no
is everyone ready for rockets
no
oh wait hang on
we have to we have to jump scare everyone who's totally not playing dawn trail right now
hang on let me just
what
what
wake up
what
oh no is my stuff not working
no
unfortunate
is it a discord soundboard
yeah
are you gonna do what I did and
start playing a random eve engine failure
sounds just to scare people playing eve on the side
oh
that's so mean
I did that a couple times in rock
in rock grind and I got a couple messages going
I fucking hate you
that's really fucked up
I got that message and I laughed so hard
my favorite thing that's come out of dawn trail
is not like a character or like anything else
it's just you know
valigarmanda
ah
and if you don't know what that is
you'll figure it out
you sure
I like
I like how it said
it's like oh
valigarmanda
and I'm
oh here we go
yes
wake up
I like that they put us
oh no wait that's a spoiler
never mind
I like the tacos
I like the tacos
I like the tacos are good
the
I want to kiss each head
I want to kiss each head
same bestie
speaking of kissing heads
hi everybody
welcome to another episode of Raccoons
what
I'll introduce you to the amazing players that bring you the show starting off with Minerva
Minerva
hello everyone my name is Minerva
aka Party Demoness
you can find me on all socials under that name
I am an artist and full time streamer and I am a monster appreciator of some variety so you should come hang out with me over at my place
of course
I'm finger gutting at you
I promise
of course we have the amazing Cabal
hello my name is Cabal
I'm a
apparently professional Final Fantasy 14 player and I'm playing Kaleem Shibura level 8 ghost mages
okay well what are your job levels
let's
I think I have blacksmith at 100 machinist at 100 carpenter at 100 miner at 100 botnist at 99
good lord
let's go
let's go
Talim is cracked
I'm still stuck in the level 99 MSQ
I am
you are a professional
true to my character I like making money
oh no the DPS is the queue has come up it's Beetle
it's me Beetle good time zone everyone I am also known as Froggylock and I'm a professional artist and variety streamer here on Twitch
but you can find me like everywhere else hiding under that same handle in your MMO on your social media platform everywhere
in my closet?
I'm a level 8 kobold investigator I forgot to throw that one in there
speaking of in your closet it's salty gem
wait
that was the worst segway ever
you're welcome
since pride month has just ended
wait yeah what's wrong with you?
the logos changed so you can't be gay anymore
it's wrath month
we have gay pride now we have gay wrath
right now we have gay wrath
I'll go back to the closet
yeah
that makes sense
no come out it's gay wrath month
yeah my name is Snorty Snub
I play heart
and fun fact about heart is that it grows about one inch every year
good for him
how do you mean that?
me wishing I could grow larger than an inch
hi I'm Zoran
I'm your hosting game master for this evening
what does that mean?
I'll tell you when you're older
oh
guys?
also I like how the logo's been skewed the entire time let me fix that
oh yeah it's all fucked up
yeah there we go
I'm pretty sure someone's been looking at it going like why is it not aligned and centered
I'm like here you go
that's better
I blame Valigarmanda
shut up
I'm just making a black boy
here you go it's just half now
there you go
God
just messed that all up
anyway hi chat
it was lovely to see everybody
and we put out a notice on Patreon and stuff like that
these are the last episodes
oh my god
yeah these are the last ones so be sure to tell your friends and everything
because we're getting to the last episodes of Raccoons
chat you have to start spamming I was here
you know
how else are we gonna know
exactly
and since these are some of the last episodes Zoran has allowed us to make backflips
that's great Zoran was saying that Zoran invented the backflip
Zoran said if any of you guys want a backflip let me know
so now we have free backflips
free backflips
it does not cost us an action to do a backflip
yippee
thanks Zoran
you're welcome
I saw somebody say sad in the chat
well if you're going to miss us that much you can always go ahead over to
patreon forward slash narrative declaration sign up at the $5 tier and you'll be able to see more of us
in the kingmaker campaign
yeah
we already have what is it
six episodes out already
yeah I think episode six went out which
they left a lot of comments of like this is
freaking hilarious so
yay
to tell you what happened we practically Pokemon battled two NPCs that we were going to bring along with us the victor so
that's how fucked up we got
it was really good
it's called a trial
right
we gave each of them a knife and made them fight like chimps in international waters
before that we wiped out an entire population of fae
with the coins
yeah
no no no that that's more recent
congratulations you just sold an episode
oh you were talking about in the forest where we made those two guys fight
yeah
we're the good guys right
sure
I was told that we were going to be that at the start of that campaign
I think that was a lie
I
you do have a necromancer on your team
so
that makes no sense
you're that necromancer
that's the worst excuse I've heard
that's the worst excuse I've heard
so far
speaking of bad excuses
who wants to tell me
what happened last episode
I did it last week
no one
I don't wanna
okay
today
I get
I get
I get
I get a
you know what
it's a party gift from us
because I don't think we've ever let you have one
no
I think this is the first time
you can have it
there you go
there you go
you can have that buddy
that's true
from us to you
that's for you
happy birthday Soren
you're welcome
happy birthday
it's your last episode
cheers
maybe
this is your episode Soren
I mean
could be the last episode
no this is now called
the Soren episode
it's your episode
it's my episode
it's mine
through a golf club
we're your warriors of light
and you're our
Wook Lamont
this is your episode
this is your episode buddy
I've even been playing
Final Fantasy
but of course
what happened last time
on Raccoons
Zoran became the Dawns
just like in the Final Fantasy
MMO they've all been playing non-stop
they got on the boat
wait that's so true
oh my god
the guy was flying
new trails
after helping out
several of the fairies
inside of Shumtown
finding all of their friends
getting everything ready
and making various deals
they all deal with
Terry the fairy fairy man
the best character
in the entire campaign
and was able to hop
on to the fairy
of course Talim
almost lost all of his money
mmm
because
because our dear
potato mancer
who now
thanks to chat
knows how to conjure tomatoes
yeah
potato tomato
doesn't matter
makes money
good job of him
good job
and
made about
what was it like
64,000 something gold
for you?
something like that
absurd amount
yeah
yeah
you're carrying all of that
so with all of that
you have now
ferried off
into this underground
lake
but of course while you were there
a giant serpent came up
a nearly devoured beetle
and great
and great
and great
you guys were able to fend it off
I'm shaking you
save your friends
and the fairy
has finally landed
Terry the fairy fairy man
wished you all
figure it out
as you all debarked
and now we return
to our fellow adventurers
who are now
at the entrance
of
a new system of caves
various fairies
and
shooms
and things of like
have already made their way forward
making their way past
all these
different levels
and
complicated
through puts of
caves and passages
now you and the rest of your companions
practically an army following you
has now
made it off the fairy
in front of you
past these cavernous halls
is a throughput of multiple
hallways
multiple cave systems
multiple pathways
you've no idea where they go
and there is no one else here
to help you
what
do you all do?
I'm kind of hungry
I'm getting really tired
of these caves
I'm tired of caves in general
I want to eat a fish
Zoran I cast time since
how long were we on the ferry?
fuck you
I want to know exactly
what day it is
on the
on the
raccoon calendar
is that cake maker?
you
you were on the ferry
for
around eight
eight hours
okay
so you went down
several strands
so Zoran in those eight hours
I will pester
there
Terry
the ferry ferryman
to ask
where are you dropping us off
over there
and he left you here
wild
he just
up and left
grips
Terry by the throat
and goes
what the fuck is that
Terry
what the fuck is that
at this point
he is far gone
on his turtle
on his turtle
no I did it over
one of the eight hours
Zoran
oh my god
we're being railroaded
help
choo choo
sorry
um
is this where
he's dropped off
everyone
is this the drop off spot
this is the drop off point
okay
okay
I mean in that case
it probably whines
if we just proceed ahead
yeah
no wait
we don't need to interrogate Terry
I can ask
that not the hags
behind us
okay
because they were already going to go here
so presumably
they know where we are
Soren
oh my god
okay I like how you're trying to be very aggressive
of getting all this information
and which
sure ask
yeah
yeah
so um
excuse me
uh
which one are you talking to
where are we
both of them
they're a duo
they're married Soren
they're married
you can't talk to them individually
they're a unit
they're a pair
yeah they have the swarm tag
ah
they
they
they look around trying to
scratch their heads
uh
trying to get a good idea
as to where they're going
and
they
they look back to you heart
and say
well I'm
we were supposed to
have a guide here
we don't know where he is
you set up for a guide?
yes
whoa
this place
Terry the fairy fairman
said there would've been
would've been a guide here
hear me out
I think that Terry the fairy fairman
is a corrupt guy
we shouldn't have trusted
oh well we figured that out sweetheart
I don't think we did it too quickly though
wait is heart sassing
the elmas
there's been enough
time progression
that I'm willing to do this now
oh
character growth
character growth
not scared of old ladies
anymore
I summon a mango for grey
oh thank you
yay
I would like mango
how use mango
besides putting in face
use mango
use mango
how uh
how dark it is it
in this cave
to help out
it's been eight hours
so I assume beetle and stuff
would've helped with first aid
and all that
oh yeah
we could've rested right
yeah
oh
you should
you should be good to go
I'm gonna just hit the rest button
and as for how dark the cave is
it's that dark
no
I can't see
beetle's gonna light a torch
nevermind beetle's out of torches
does anybody got a light?
that's so cool
one sec
let me check my
brug will come up
he'll be like
here you go
oh you're the best
and he will hand you
five torches
wow
what are you doing with all these brug?
he gestures to the army behind you
grew will also take out a torch
that's fair
and he lights one up himself
oh
I have one torch left
let me just uh
don't worry I have a lot
okay
don't worry I have five of them
you have five entire torch
wait how do I put the light torch on me
how do I put it
put it on me?
right click your token
there's a little torch thing
oh
light on himself
oh
did I do it?
there you have it on
oh
yeah
yeah
light on the skin
swoosh swoosh swoosh
swings torch around
oh
you know
I'm gonna put this
I'm gonna put this
in
the party loot
where is it at?
where's my
oh there we go
I'm gonna put an ever burning torch
in the party loot
and if nobody wants it
Pilleen will go and hand it to Greg
Greg
who's cherished apprentice
ha ha
fuck Greg
fuck Greg
give me that torch
no I'm just kidding
Greg will
take your torch
you go
what's this?
D'leave will like
D'leave will like hand him
and it's like
he's like
this is something I've acquired
early on
in my journey
it has served me well
but these days
I find not very much useful
perhaps
it could serve you better
okay
D'leave has like hands him like a torch
that has like a
weird like
off color magic flame on it
that you know
just stays lit
there's a parma beans that
is it in your inventory?
no I put it in the party loot
what's in the
yeah
where is it?
do you put it in the
it's in equipment
huh
it's in party loot
under the rock goons tab
it didn't
it doesn't show
huh
alright
I see just torch
but we're gonna just
I'll get it figured out
okay well
so
I'll bring it back into my inventory
he takes it and
turns it on and is like
wow
I am a wizard
perfect
he is now the torch bearer
it's true
he'll carry the torch forward
uh
gray is gonna listen for anything
other than the crowd behind them
to see if there's anything suspicious
uh
in the future
if for them
uh
would I roll a
Perception
oh perception
okay
cause you're looking around for stuff
yeah
gray is like
looking around for tracks
and it's like
Philippe just kinda has his arms folded
and he's just like
probably good that we have somebody
who is
better at navigating
we could wander
around in the underground
for
years
centuries
and well
I don't have a problem with that
I'm sure
everyone else would prefer not to
I wonder if we should just wait here
for the guide to come back
I don't even know what all this is
uh
I rolled a total of 36
you roll over 36
um
you'll
you'll kinda smell some things around
you
you smell the fairies
uh
that you were bunked with before
a lot of them have already
gone forward
into the tunnels
themselves
but you would also smell
they all didn't go through
a central tunnel
or a particular one
they all seem to just
spread around
and just go forward
mm-hmm
as for signs
like for tracks
or anything you also notice
of like maybe
footprints here and there
maybe like a little
uh shell of a
you know
discarded wing skin
or something
from a fairy wing
would there be anything
that would be
that would like perk
her interest down
one of these specific tunnels
unfortunately not
nothing that majorly gives
like alarm bells
you can tell
just by looking at it
it's extremely dark
yeah
and for anything smell wise
it's just normal
just dirt
and stale air
okay
okay
i guess we have
we either wait
or we pick
we could be here forever
well if nothing stands out
then they must all go
to the same place
or something like that
only one way to find out
uh
you wanna cover heart's eyes
and then spin them
in a circle
and go wherever he ends up
pointing
nah i can do that by myself
heart
uh
grabs a slab of rock
straight from the ground
and makes it into like
a cube
that is hollowed out
and then it puts on top
of his head
you just made a box
you look like a
street fighter world tour
world tour enemy
that's right
and if i spin around a bit
too fast
this rock
can kill someone
oh my god
the shot puts a rock
across the fucking room
takes out fucking
the bandaged dude
because i forgot his name
heart will stand in the middle
yeah that guy
and he will start spinning
okay
you're good
you're good
you're good
token
you're good
roll me
roll me a 1d6
just a standard 1d6
yep
flat one
okay
six
you choose this one
very top right
you know
right is always the right way
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah except for when it isn't
anyway let's go
yeah
yeah because you don't have
any sense left
that makes no sense
to lean like looks back
and everybody else then like
looks at where we're going
he's like well three rights do make a left
they'll all nod and you'll see that they will begin following you
oh the army
we are a pretty big group
all right
i have a question
yes
is it easier if we are this many that if this is a dead end or something or maybe we are to be ambushed or the like or perhaps the
are this many that if this is a dead end or something or maybe we are to be ambushed
or the like or perhaps there's like a rock fall or similar dangers that not every single person
gets trapped inside a cave i mean unless he looks around there are some people that will
be eaten first i can't make mangoes for everyone heart you can move rocks are we out
did you immediately just decide to go to cannibalism immediately i can hope can i and then he walks in
to lima's like sitting there and he's got like his hands up like what the
fuck and then he like motions to greg and it's like the potato master's right there he's like
to leave was just like what they were talking about it's like greg is like my wonderful apprentice greg
is here nobody would start with greg around and his miraculous powers he conjures a potato and a
intimate and tomato clean does like that and then he like you know at points he's like hey that's my
boy oh my god oh my god oh my god hey chat in type one through nine to vote which way they are actually
going oh oh no how unfortunate what do you mean there's more than one six freaking options right sure
that sure is i don't like that i don't like that at all i don't need you to roll a 1d9
yeah so basically for our listeners uh basically what i'm having them doing like for twitch chats
that they're going through the caves and as you all go through the caves even with your light sources or
so you begin to find that these cave systems begin to go left and right and right and left and
begin to kind of lose your way and all of a sudden you turn back some other people are gone some
people reappear again but the one that we are going to be choosing in five four three two one
good old number nine thank you chat oh boy
is it because we went down the is is it because we went down the number six path first is that why
you did it change
oh well i'm gonna have you guys
i thought it was funny i'm gonna delete you here
um actually we do it this way yeah just hold on where you're at
gonna be a weird i can't believe way in which to do this
fell down a hole
whoa whoa whoa we're flying through tunnels whoa oh my god blueberry bush
whoa so as you continue down the cavernous walls you find yourself separated from your friends
this is bullshit um yeah i knew this was gonna happen i'm tired as you are separated from your
friends you notice after you exit one of the caves that there is a lovely home blocking your path
it is of nice like wooden structure with like various bits of rocks and stuff kind of like help
building like the core of it or random scraps of wood it's kind of helped make some sort of framing
and you see like you know how like a hobbit door is as a doorknob in the middle and a little bit
round and everything yeah it looks like that in front of you okay okay son of a bitch
this is probably the gem or tevrock or tvok good fucking i'm so tired getting really sick of
finding weird houses in caves can i do a thing sure thing nice
can you unimpost the game nope okay
all right something goes to move token on the board token won't move
zoran locks eyes to salting door stuck what are you what are you doing
foreign stares at me and goes i know what you are the magnets of the table you've been messed up oh
well heart walks forward and goes i knew that everyone was gonna be split up like eventually
yeah look at this place look at how weird this place look it makes no sense this same thing has
happened to us two times now exactly like tevrock's probably around with us again like
yeah language here but like i wanna i bet these flowers aren't even real and he's gonna take a bite
out of one of the plants you bite into one of the plants and you see it's a scrumptious real plant
what the yeah i bet this wall ain't real heart kicks down the wall
roll roll the athletics
you guys are being really mean jesus christ
oh my god
maybe we should refrain from the physical damage just in case
talim like just crosses arms and shakes his head he's just like mortals
chris slowly turns her head to look at talim she's very tired
these plants aren't an illusion at all this wall is an illusion kicks down the wall
oh my god you kick down the wall you see stone and wood crumble down and burst into
a guy's home what you see before you is a man who looks back at you all and goes and you're like
oh but he's not much of a man i don't know how to do this via tokens so what i'm going to do
is draw a very good thing in which to try to emulate this uh
uh you see that it's not a man at all the top part is a man but the bottom part is a long snake
oh it's a labia i thought you were going to be like there's a cave centaur i'm like
i'm sorry why are there the minotaur comes out from behind
no place to run down here i'm i'm sorry about that i'm sorry about that we have bad
we have bad experiences with underground houses
they thought it was fake they thought it was an illusion
oh that was real hey i'm so sorry guy hey i'm really sorry yeah we're really sorry man
i'm just sitting here trying to draw myself a bit of a copper you up my wall
what's wrong with you we've been hallucinating houses and walls and there have been fake ones and
real ones but the real ones are occupied by monsters we're so sorry there's our wall i'm gonna just
gonna have to teach you something but my mama's always told me hospitality first so why don't you come
in so i can we can discuss how you're gonna pay for the damages yeah we have to reimburse them for the
damages yeah you two are probably going to have to worry about that i didn't do any of this
you didn't stop us you didn't stop us either you immediately just went and did it
wait where's my uh at the talk of reimbursing uh i'm going to um where's it at where's it at that i'm
gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna roll for stealth i got it away i got a 28 as talim just like steps back
into the darkness and extinguishes his light he is going to attempt attempt to grab talim before he
slips away i need to see if i actually grab him or not you're just going to stealth
damn you don't have reactive strikes huh i don't however it would be funny yeah regardless the
fellow will kind of like put his hands onto his hips and go like wow what you gonna do about my wall
hurt can you fix his wall
yeah i just need to go inside yeah you could don't worry our friend has special powers
and can remake your wall yeah yeah i can like ask wood to do things
i wish i had that kind of power don't worry beetle you have the power to ask your brain to do things
whoa yeah it's like i can ask wood to do things asks the wood to recreate a wall
wood looks at heart and it's just like it's like you're not my union leader like
it's worth it that's all thoughts up if mine do's
wood puts their feet up on the table goes nah i'm having my lunch break
and then when we leave we see wood with a cap on a hammer and nails sitting there yeah
yeah hey could um can you open your door here you made a hole in the wall you could just walk
through well heart's gonna fix it i don't want to disrupt it i mean it's not that big it's like
my leg big you see he'll he'll pan over unlock it and open the door or you can further see i don't
even know if i can like fix his tail image whatever it's not gonna work so you see that it's a nicely
furnished home you see that he's actually getting uh several dishes arrayed onto a sort of oval like
table several stools are laid out seeing that this person probably can't really sit in a chair
correctly due to his snake-like nature there's a little chimney area not with fire but with like a
nice resonating stone of warmth that is keeping the place nice and cozy and several cupboards and
stuff and things kind of stood around his house but it seems like he spruced this up looks much
cleaner than obviously the caves you've been dealing with and he looks like wow
he just looks at the wall exasperated the audacity well we're really sorry we're mentally unwell we've
been in the caves for like a year i'm so sorry we're we have mental illness um i can't see time
since zoren how long have we actually been in the caves not that long yeah what do you mean not that
long it was multiple months there you just you just hear out of the cave you're just like um actually
uh uh scoot on in and let uh heart follow in and after her we just we just got off terry's ferry uh
thanks for being so understanding about the wall we're a little uh we'll stir crazy
oh don't worry several people have come in from the ferry oh yeah so are you you must be a resident
here oh yeah i'd like to i've been staying here for a cool while enjoy my cup of tea i need a sips
what kind of tea is it oh it's really just water with distilled rock dust not much but sometimes i
like to give myself a special treat with my flavorful flowers out front did you try you want to try
some and you'll get a bag that's on one of the cupboards over there no no no no that's okay i would
love to thank you are you expecting someone oh it's my birthday
what's that your birthday bad so we busted down your wall on your birth that's hey heart could you
possibly we're so sorry oh god we're so sorry oh yeah yeah yeah yeah no um sorry about a higher level
and i could do some wonky shit like reverse time it's just like heart kicks down the wall
how about this why don't you all join me for a couple since now my guests wanted to arrive it's been
he looks down a while oh no if anything i i will say this that um
i didn't expect to meet someone who who wants to actually celebrate their birthday like we've been
down here for quite a while i was here during beetle's birthday this is beetle he's my brother
hi hi heart i'm the person who took through your wall last year um yeah sorry i've been a pollen in my nose
yeah but um uh yeah hi sneezes on the dude's tail
happy birthday heart walks forward and he brings out his bottle of wine that he had along with him
when we fell so um that mother survived that mother survived so i didn't mention anything
yes or didn't say your bottle of wine breaks exactly so uh you're so hostile today
hostile players hostile players fuck you you're railroading us
fuck you why is the case like this what is it fuck you gay man like
fuck me i guess
it's his birthday what the
fuck that's so that's so typical oh my god i can't believe you made it his
birthday oh my god that's so weird what the
flaw uh no but heart uh hands out uh his bottle of wine and he goes it's been uh it's been cave aged for one
year oh that's enough laid glass oh he looks around a ghost not here not seeing or what's that
uh that that's just our ghost
yeah is there a ghost in the room with this right now
yeah i hope i hope you're not discriminatory to close the door we don't want the ghost leaking in
and fix my wall and it's like no he's outside to lean we'll actually like
like exit like out of stealth out of the hallway and like
and like wave through the hole in the wall like hello
that's a ghost walk dad they usually aren't very friendly all that one is despite how prickly he can be
oh yeah you get ghosts down here oh sometimes there are ghosts they're very scary
could i ask you a question i will allow it how do you feel about hands just before we like settle in
here
speaking of hands my head is in mine at the moment
how do you feel about hands oh i'm actually more of a feet person
uh you are your your friends if you can tell us a little bit more about your oh my god
the park begins repairing the wall
the silence from zoran means we're going to die
he looks at his hands
i don't know what you're talking about
okay okay sorry we we had a run in with a a fairy who was actually a bunch of hands and
they attacked us so but they were pretending to be somebody else so
can't be too careful to leave just standing outside with his arms crossed this beetle sounds
like a crazy person he's gonna agree he's gonna sit down at the table i can't believe a bunch of crazies
came here on my birthday what we're not crazy we have trauma potato potato no no no no no
it was correct it was correct yeah how about this come on sit down let's enjoy a nice cup of tea and
all try to let the traumas fade away okay he said he takes some of his tea and he sips it
i roll a craft can i roll a crafting shake to repair his wall sure thing do it with uh with fortune
which means you roll it twice take the highest because of your colors roll twice and take the highest
that's so cool nice
that's a nat 20. i'll do it
oh my god i will use my wooden powers to improve his entire wall it's got like beautiful ornate
little patterns in the wood carvings and stuff it's like well it's bad baby
birthday bonus yeah that's the birthday present right there oh thank you very much for fixing my wall
sorry again it's quite all right so where where are your friends they're all late
yeah he looks down sad that sucks
do they live nearby
yeah where your friends live
yeah oh they live further on down in several of the caves
there's another little settlement with a bunch of fairies usually all
well you know we are we're sort of like adventurers we're really good at finding and forcing people
to do things
i'm very interested in that tea could you tell us more about uh about your friends as you
absolutely come on down let's enjoy a couple
and so yeah yeah you see he'll sit around or kind of like prepare a little tea set that's on the
table and he'll pass everyone uh a tea and it smells great oh thank you oh you've been so understanding
thank you he's gonna take a little whiff and she's like so what kind of flowers are those
okay oh those are just just sort of like more of a mushroom really but they very much look like
flowers they're very lovely that's why i didn't recognize tell him are you gonna move in or stay out
there oh um i mean did he seem like incredibly startled by the fact that delim is a ghost it was
like he doesn't want to make him uncomfortable it's like he seems to have calmed down at it okay
sure yeah you can get down the door then there the bit is if anything are you more afraid of socializing
with a ghost or are you more afraid if the ghost is standing by the corner of your door and stares
at you yeah that's awful that's awful this ghost sits down at the table and stares at him out of
a courtesy he'll still hand you a uh a cup of tea but obviously it won't work for you tilly will nod
thankfully it's all well some of my friends are very tall and some of them can fly they got little wings
and stuff and some of them kind of look like you when he kind of points to you bill oh yeah there's
several of them like the combo one's named tip tip oh i hope nothing happened to them no
mainly oh do you want to hear some news i don't know if you get up much no i would love to hear it
okay so the city is a flame like everything is burning everything is going bad yeah
you gray and beetle roll me a fortune save okay oh man god damn i knew it
oh you're being so hostile you're being a hostile player why are you so hostile to me i knew it i
fucking knew it i uh i got a nat 20 for a total of 33. okay waiting for them to be high as
fuck you got a total of 20. either that or heavy metal poisoning i got a 26 and if i get a success
i get a critical success automatically heart it tastes great
like this this tea tastes wonderful gray ah perfect it hit the spot beetle you're feeling really sleepy
oh like incredibly sleepy just kind of like like you can't even keep your head up heart starts
telling the news his speech starts slurring in beetle's ears beetle just slumps forward on the table
oh um beetle oh like patent patent patent patent patent are you good well sorry i think it's all just
catching up to me i can i can put you in the bedroom if you don't get yourself a no sleep uh i don't i
can't take your bed from you i i think i'll just i'll have a little and then he just like clatters like
the plate with his nose and goes flat on the table it's okay i got a couch in there you can rest on
maybe just a little maybe just a little bit
and he kind of like lean like kind of like picks you up a little bit and you notice his tail
like he's a long tail and it's been attached like kind of like past this door or whatever like the
door has been kind of like shut and he's kind of like slithered past like this tiny gap and um he'll
just kind of like lead you over like yeah that's trying to put you to bed and he will uh bring you
over question yes uh earlier the he said it was it was the mushrooms and what was it rock dust yeah
rock dust rock dust he's like oh he's like his simple little drink okay rock not rot okay yeah
just making sure because my ears are funny uh sabito you basically enter inside and at this point uh
you go to sleep oh it's dark guys you live in there now guys it's really dark in here damn you live in
there honk you me me me me me so i would just start to know where so things are burning huh and he
sips another and he and he fills up your cups yeah everything's burning upside like everything like
it's kind of crazy if you think about it oh that's a real shame i don't really go up top very often
sometimes people up top wearing armor and stuff usually come down and i usually help them out and
send them on their way how long have you been down here oh i've been down here for a while of my
life people didn't like me too much up on the surface so i live down here is that where your accent
comes from probably just from not talking too much of people oh you talk better than i do oh would you
like to try some of the food of course oh you're gonna eat that you're gonna eat that you see he'll
take uh you see there's a nicely just like roasted chicken he'll take it rip a bit off and start biting
into it and you'll notice his snake fangs and everything just rock and just the swallows
i'm gonna give him get a nice whiff of this food just to try and figure out what it is without asking
yeah sure give me perception yippee if i can click it oh my god it took me like two tries to try and get
it on the thing uh that's a total 29 i'm eating you want to eat it go ahead heart i'm eating she's
like i'm eating okay smells like so smell like beef hard is eating clean is staring at it uh you begin
to sniff it like it smells very meaty not quite chicken you might tell this would be something else
you can't quite identify it but it's some it's definitely meat yeah all right she's gonna she's
gonna start eating it and while she's chewing on she's like bro i can't put my nose on what it tastes
more like beef really more than anything there's some kind of reptile what is this
i've never had this roll me a 14 save okay oh my god okay oh my god
uh i'm gonna re-roll that uh eight i'm gonna spend a hero point yes i am i'm not gonna this is funny
i got a 21 all right this is the last episode because we're all victims to a serial killer
i i got one better with a total of 22. awesome uh both of you start feeling very sleepy son of a
bitch oh oh you're both must be very tired you seem to i think this is what they call the iris and
outside i thought it was just my age catching up
great great great great great great we need to we can't fall asleep by the table
she just falls over oh dairy and i'll try to get them the bed too
and let's see he'll come over help out gray go ahead to leave to leave is
okay can i roll perception like all this
yeah to or is it i forget what it is is it perception to tell somebody's line yeah like
like an insight check for dnd5d it's perception okay you're perceiving this person to see their motives
yeah so i got a total of a 23. you see from his nature that he is very much like oh let me
let me bring you somewhere um you see that he is acting very kind like very caring or so like he's
trying his best to be a very good host but he definitely is like let me just get you out of this
situation to lean will actually like like stand up and he'll be like please please allow me to help
oh of course go ahead and try to get the big one there
to lean world hold on i have to do
can i roll an athletic check to see how deep the divot i have created in his floor is
i just barely got over it i think i hold on wait a second um let me check really quick i'm not
sure if it's a 20 or if it's a 25 that i need i think it's 20.
yeah no yeah it's 20 all right so like to lean world heft up heart best that he can
and uh bring him to the
room i guess yeah so as you as you bring heart over uh you see he'll stand over here and go oh my god
it don't worry i'm very embarrassed i'm not fully clothed and he motions to his tail
is just like no no no i like i i insist you're already carrying gray it is this less it is no
trouble at all you see during the time if you're trying to get heart going he's already stowed gray
away yeah uh he looks to you and goes no you can't come into someone's home and just want to see them
this undressed you know it's like allow me to go in and put some clothes on to leave
will unceremoniously drop hard on the floor
and talim will like put his hands on his hip and like one is resting on his palm was like
so what you're saying is i should allow my friends to be taken while unconscious into a stranger's other
room and think nothing of it i am dead not stupid probably intimidation
uh where's my skills there we go uh
i have nothing intimidation i got a three you're a ghost why do you have no intimidation no i don't
have any charisma you sure you have a hero point though we saw things through diplomacy no no
i you know what i i scared i'll use it hold up hold it on it you you try diplomacy at the first
and then you went more aggressive after i'll allow you a diplomacy roll because we didn't get to get
that resolved so go ahead and roll me diplomacy i feel that would be taking opportunity away please
don't let it eat us it's not it's a 19 i will you go with that i you only have one hero point um
i only have one hero point and like you know like the law of averages that's almost an average roll i
uh uh uh fuck it let's see if the curse persists
we're gonna die yeah this is the end of the campaign we're gonna get eaten that's the end of the story
you don't quite you don't quite convince them and he goes oh just don't worry just i'll let you come
inside here in a second just let me just get them all situated in myself i i zorn you owe me a diplomacy check
i see we're just unhinged today oh my god fuck you game master yeah yeah you wrote me a diplomacy check
no no just please wait enjoy your cup of tea i don't believe you
what was that fucking error delivery don't worry i get i get what's going on so as you're having this
argument uh gray and beetle i want to reveal you here just for a second thanks yeah yeah thanks let me
let me say something up real quick yeah put us on the meat hooks yeah i love texas chainsaw massacre
does this work out is this a good music for this
uh i would cannibalize people to this music so
i oh yeah fuck me i knew it i'm not meat hooks is what you see but a meat room god damn it
oh my players are being so hostile why don't my players trust me why are my players being so hostile
my players don't trust me being hostile to me and believe me puts you in the meat room
oh this is triggering my tryptophobia holy crap i'm gonna just cover this up with my player sheet
both of you roll me a fortitude save and as you're rolling them i'll explain what's going on
you're you have been unceremoniously plopped down onto a room that is assumingly filled with meat the
little like fleshy basically floors wall ceiling and everything else is basically like taken
taken side stay to the giant gaping hole this flesh hole that continues to go down
down and if you were currently awake which both of you are struggling with you would know that
there is a throat of some kind and these little things these little kind of like little nubs or
so are slowly but surely pushing you closer and closer to this throat
we're being sacrificed to an old god we're being sacrificed to an old god hey so you know what on
second thought i'm okay with this here have heart no hey sorry hey sorry i'm sorry can i spend a hero
point to make it so that you never use the verb plop again oh my god so is this how some mimic oh my god
funny funny you say that no no hey hover over i don't know if you can see it but uh
you never asked the guy's name
we didn't his name's kimem what's his name backwards mimic you oh my god you never even asked what the
guy's name was to lean mimic we run into at the very beginning of this campaign i said hey there's
one mimic in this campaign and to lean as you become aggressive kemin notices you are not giving away
and the illusion drops and you see
all the walls and everything pretty much just disappear as you see it is a ginormous mimic
son of a bitch
old buddy son of a
fucking god damn it
fuck fuck fuck
well we're asleep we didn't know any of this
i want to take your fortune saves as your initiative rolls
okay
and uh let's see here
i need everybody else well mostly to lean yeah uh to roll me initiative
wow so we're in two war episodes in a row what a treat
you know the spongebob movie where the grandma's the fish's tongue
no oh my god the lambia is the fucking mimic's tongue i'm gonna scream inside the alaskan bullwurm
we're inside the alaskan bullwurm right now okay i'm just gonna roll your guys thing just to kind
of get there i'll just fix it here in a second you're that you're that the heart should be here
there we go all right you see this thing uh it's not much of a snake but more of its tongue that also
extends over down to the mouth itself and it looks at you to lean and it just the the illusion just
fades i would do a whole thing but i didn't have enough time the room and stuff and everything else
the seats the table the food the cupboards the my little fireplace everything just starts to
as it stops being as rigid and turns more and more until kind of like this like squishy fleshy
but the illusions just fading away and it looks at you
and just and just basically just one of its one of its arms it's like this meaty appendage
and strikes at you to lean rolling a natural one no thank god it'll try again with the minus five
it'll hit you you do have emergency targe if you want to use it i do and i'll use my reaction to uh
to throw up my shield giving me a plus two uh plus two ac all right we'll see you got emergency
charge up it's going to do some damage to you
25 points of damage to you jesus christ you could minus the amount that uh i think your thing just
brings up your ac it's not blocking yeah it just brings up my ac i don't have the um
i don't yeah it would to uh yeah we'll say that it won't happen because it'll bring it by two he'll
still hit you by one um but of course he hits you there and i'll say that's all the actions he can
do for now taleem yes
oh
oh yeah yes yes sorry it's your turn okay i i thought you were gonna like finish the sins with
something so i probably left you on a thing there that that's uh you know you're perfectly fine um
uh tally will actually like as he gets you know just
fucking whammed by this dude uh tally will actually uh
uh look around and see that he's inside a mimic and uh will actually
right there and uh i will cast
sanguine mist
is a uh as i am conjure forth a cloud of foul blood-sucking fog
the vitality of living living to bolster my own nice living creature in the area uh when i cast
a spell aside from myself but guess what i'm not living so it doesn't fucking matter
uh uh um must make a fortitude save and if they don't they take 66 void damage
and uh creatures within the area are concealed which includes myself
yeah suck the mimic from the inside that's awesome wait i make a if i make a fortitude save too right
no you're out of it yeah are you sure yeah yes i'm right there
yes that's true not within the uh the ten foot burst okay oh yeah if you hover over it it shows
the uh it shows the squares yeah yeah you are you are there heart you're not in the whole area
you never got brought in saline saved you 10 out of 10. so it succeeds on this forward to save
with a 27 um so it'll still take half the damage so go ahead and roll me damage there
that is uh 17 points of damage it just you just hear the house just
just start rumbling the throat begins to gurgle and if i do math correctly which i'm not really
prone to i think i uh gain uh eight temporary hit points from there
and uh to lean was just like and uh the saw the fog proceeds to suck the vitality out of uh the mimic
who empowered to leave yeah let me get you it would be four since it's half of the damage that you dealt
to one of the creatures in the area and if it did succeed then oh that's right took half damage all
right yeah and it's temporary yeah so you got four temporary hit points yeah so with that uh i will
spend my my my last action because that was two actions i'll spend my last action to
raise my shield awesome excellent sorry let me try to change the music up a little bit let's uh
let's do that one but that's fine oh yeah heart
basically to get out of this basically overcoming the effects you're technically unconscious of this
moment with how the effect is for this one uh just roll me a four two save you just need to beat a 10.
beat a 10. do i automatically succeed on that there you go you're up
you are now awaketh you have two actions left you're still prone yeah so you know so you know there is
the token for the mimic yeah technically the entire area is the mimic so you can attach anywhere that's
super cool uh heart wakes up looks around and goes huh uh and just sees that talim has his shield raised
this individual uh is looking a little bit weirder he doesn't judge that it looks weirder
it's more along the final fact that talim is defending against him which means that this person that
that's bad heart does the thing that he did in the earliest parts of the campaign and he does a
kip up by flexing his back um so i stand up uh i stand uh and then for one action uh i activate my
kinetic aura uh so as heart rises up uh i will
i will with the the sound effect of a a brick against concrete uh heart rises up with just his heels
touching the ground uh as he envelops himself in his cool little funny rock thing his little cool armor
in earth uh and except armor in earth literally just looks like him so that's my turn as hard
stands up and goes what are we doing
great
same thing probably fortune fortitude just don't roll one
i rolled a three for a total you're good
yeah babe you're still prone however she's going to the meat room wait yeah she's going to wake up
slowly and like her eyes are all bleary she's seeing this really gross like undulating meat room
come into focus and she just she looks startled as she jumps up and braces herself against the wall
which is also now very fleshy and gross yeah you see the rows of ginormous teeth that are now flanking the
walls like the ceiling that would have been there is now just parted up where you see the stone ceiling
and all the teeth and meat and the interior of this thing's mouth is just starting to close in
uh can she spend an action uh can i spend an action to um try and wake up beetle ahead of time
sure can all right she's gonna just reach down just start shaking him just beetle beetle wake up
beetle you're up beetle oh what what stinks meat room meat room
i'll do it
it's just this overbearing
get up get up get up get up get up
you have one action left unless you stood
gray yeah i stood okay make sure you didn't right click the prone off i got you
all right beetle okay so i'm gonna take one action to stand up and then i'm gonna pull out
uh my remaining caltrops and i'm going to throw them in the hole okay uh can you post up caltrops in
your thing yeah let me see here let me see here uh you have to make a dc 14 acrobatics check or take
one d4 piercing damage i'll say since this thing's literally the size of the house it'll fail and it'll
take the bleed damage click that bleed damage for me yeah let me see
just one persistent bleed damage
do you just you know like i want to beat a mimic just beat a caltrops yeah
yeah yeah exactly you're not making it slowly build bleed for one damage what else do i have
what else do i have what else do i have what else do i have what else do i have what else do i have
you're currently prone as well what no i got up oh i have to you did the same thing i did
oh should i have to right click it my bad okay uh what else do i have
i'm going to fetching the caltrops and one action from yeah so
throwing them picking them up throwing them i'm gonna pull out my gun and i'm not able to do
anything else that's that's it that's it for my turn yeah all out
kevin will see that its prey has awoken but it still needs a deal with this ghost that's stopping
everybody from you know doing its thing it seems to have trouble to lean like normally you would see
that like the thing that it's attacking you with like would be a lot stickier but it just didn't
take hold of you maybe because you're ghostly nature but it tries to strike you again but of
course you are concealed yes roll me a flat d20 to lean see if the attack hits you
you know one or four oh it does not that just goes away he tries again roll me another one
holy shit you're a god that's a three oh my god roll baby roll me another one i can roll low all day
one last one
i swear to god it's a one oh it's a five it's just it's just not enough but it's an mfp minus
10 for the attack and he misses
oh my god holy shit i want you if you ever played pathfinder second edition i want you to clip this
and send it to anyone who bitches about an obscure roll being just a one to a four
otherwise talim would have gone much under half of his health
talim it's your game it's my go i do not sustain my spell how do i get rid of it right click your
character and right click uh the thing if you mean the template thing i'll get rid of that okay
all right so as you know like as it you know two of these tendrils or whatever it's trying to hit
to lean with like blow like blow by him the other one bounces off his shield like the blood fog dissipates
and as my
you know what yeah as my first action i will raise my shield
my second action i will draw my weapon because i did not have it drawn
and then i will attack with uh with a with a basic attack
with my enchanted uh plus one striking wounding ass coil yeah yes
because a wow um well i don't have a hero point oh my god what the
the fuck is going on all day what is going on right now i i don't get to roll above five this
session apparently heart yeah okay my shield was raised um heart didn't get an answer to his big
question which is what is happening what's going on but he does hear screaming uh and thus for one
action heart will open the door and then regret it
you see the little little little meat blobs just trying to like drag beetle and gray into the hole
yeah this is just like hit in the game jimmy and the pulsating mass
oh what the fuck except it's beetle and the pulsating mass what the fuck um
i mean i feel like this is more like you know a hit indie game carrion but you know like yeah
it's like that yeah exactly silent hill it's just like hit in the game score score
you gotta say it like yerma score score exactly uh heart will realize what is happening not actually
realize what is happening he doesn't know what a mimic is uh he doesn't know what i know this is
he also subs big scary is trying to eat my friend this thing attached to big scary therefore this thing
bad uh but then he realizes that the whole fucking house is just
meat and he goes yeah i mean i'm gonna go and say like your your logic is flawless
yeah any any realizes wait a minute this is perfect uh this is just what i wanted i will cast what
i will cast hail of splinters uh and my angle that i will cast them in is this
oh closer to your mind when you're explaining oh uh i will cast hail of splinters within this uh
within this cone uh and what heart will do is that he will just make small
stone teeth appear and fight back by eating back oh oh oh please make a reflex saving frozen
this is truly the vore episode i hate this if you are gonna give us vore soren i'm gonna vore back
oh it fails that's that's so cool soren take 14 damage the hell splinters is beginning to make the
entire room basically the mouth bleed as this ginormous mimic just is the throat the sound is over
everybody if you're gonna if you're gonna try to eat us i'm gonna eat you i can't believe you just
cast captain crunch on the mimic that's right baby i am the corn kernel between your teeth
all right excellent job is that it or that is that is my turn and my funny aura dissipates great
okay so the door is it's been open now yeah at this point the walls and everything have just
slunk down like this house is going down basically not down as if you're sinking into it of the illusions
god the walls i have collapsed yeah you're good so i can just run out of here okay so gray is going
to uh run out of the meat room uh get a little bit of distance by going everything's practically
the meat room yeah yeah we're yeah everything is meat room uh gray is escaping away from the hole uh
and then he's going to declare kevin aka the entire mimic her corrupted prey and is then going to cast
gravity weapon you start shooting downward that's my turn yeah just shooting the floor
punching the floor my beetle oh my god we're gonna die why does this always happen guys can i shoot
point blank down that esophagusy what is going to happen let me devise a stratagem
sorry i'm also as i devise a stratagem i'm going to try and determine any known weaknesses
of a mimic you know what i actually said the words i'm gonna shoot straight down that esophagusy
i am i'm gonna shoot straight down the esophagusy did you target them it's all right that's right
sorry that's right you shoot down into it and basically just like you definitely shoot down into
it it kind of like looks like you've disturbed it okay do i get to roll for damage or did that miss
it technically miss you didn't do enough damn fuck didn't go through the toughness of its mouth
okay uh do i know any weaknesses for mimics like are they weak to fire ice uh uh no weaknesses
no resistances no nothing of that oh god oh god okay oh this thing is immortal
uh uh and then i'm gonna move five feet out here and then i'm gonna shoot this guy again at the
the negative thingamajigabajoo okay let me see
okay that one hits i'm rolling damage
blam nine points of damage into the mimacy's tongue and basically it'll take the nine points
of damage i told you we had mental health this was wrong with you so i have to point something out
the very bottom left of this room now that you see the doors and everything come down you see
there's another cave exit is it a cave exit is it so all the puzzles and the meat stuff and everything
else begin to start to shimmer a little bit more no longer is it like feeling of dry wood as if you
were walking to the hardwood floor that was before now it's more slick and everything oh god i almost got
myself squishy and as it's doing that i need everyone to roll uh now whenever you move or attack
it and stuff like that we need to make you start making checks of some sort that'll be one one of
its actions and for the other action it will look at you heart as you started to hurt it a whole bunch
it will try to get you rolls a three but you did give me that villain point yeah uh-oh
i want to spin that villain point it's my episode it's your episode story sometimes the
game master's a player too it crits you oh
give us that point back it'll do 52 points of damage to you that is so cool give that point back
i'll do the recap and of course it will turn you for one last time
hits you for it on the 19 on the die almost getting there at a crit oh my god
how does it have does it have no multiple attack penalties no it's minus five
what the fuck yeah it didn't it didn't tag you three times only text you twice
dude we gotta get out of here so i need you for the first one here heart uh roll me that athletic save
athletic save what is an athletic save you mean fortitude save nope roll me athletics
okay athletics dc wow i'm really good at this natural 20. awesome roll me this other one
oh wait no no no i'm wrong i'm wrong reflex reflex there we go told you wow i'll let that 20 go in
anyway screw it oh okay because of my mess up that's so nice of you thank you showing that one
though that reflex save you failed you are now grabbed wow you told me that you would let the crit go
through it did the first one it hit you again what the fuck
i'm not fucking with you this game is tearing us apart
what's wrong your family it'll take its bleed damage thanks to you i'll try to make a recovery
fails i'm the snack i'm the snack that fights back you are so as it like grabs a hold of heart
talim is actually going to uh run his fingers along his blade and uh put some magic into it because i'm
going to cast sure strike and uh as talim does that he is then going to do a spell strike using magnetic
acceleration so basically as he pulls back his sword uh to do a uh thrusting attack uh he's going to
target the the mimic and uh do a regular attack um for a crit
and uh let me go ahead and all right i'm just going to do a spell strike of magnetic acceleration i
didn't yeah you got it you got it and i apologize so that means we get a crit with the ass coil
and as he thrusts forward i jesus christ i swear to god
this campaign my lord uh that's a spoiler for some some kickmaker episodes so anyways yeah so um
you know he does that and uh you know it's great and everything like that and then the magic kicks in
as a electricity courses down the ass coil and it basically unlinks and fires off like a basically
like a like a rogan as the blade is magnetically accelerated and uh yeah that does double damage
baby yep so that's like 40 you don't need to click that you got it okay all right well yeah so boom 44
this thing the whole entire room is like
thrusts into it and he's and it's just like oh it's just like it's not doing that much damage just
and it's just like it's only in the sonic boom yes roll me that reflex save you should have ghost
advantage stuff i should maybe um i i don't know do you want me to add stuff to it i'll give you a
plus four circumstance bonus okay because of your ghosting nature that is a total of a 30.
yes like did you add the i'll give you a plus uh circumstance bonus you made it basically don't
worry about it excellent hit heart you are like all the meat stuff on the ground and stuff are just
just like sticking on to you restricting you yeah that fucking sucks um
uh in traditional is this a traditional grab in that i can escape it yes cool uh heart will uh then
attempt to escape by uh flexing really hard well yeah yeah let's fucking go i rolled a two on the die
uh for a total of 21 but i wish to re-roll that using a hero point i rolled a 17 for total 36 you
escape feel free to take that off you heck yeah dot i am no longer grab it uh and then for one action
i will reintegrate myself with the elements as a funny little i will flavor myself soren yes
by the power of mango yeah i will kill this guy i can't believe the mimic had a mango allergy
that's right maybe they are no you know what i'm gonna use the power of pineapple oh i'm gonna i'm gonna
slowly metabolize these guys oh yeah that's right and as part of uh activating my channel elements i
get to do one little funny thing and the funny thing that i wish to do is i wish to elemental blast this
man uh so i first use a little funny weapon infusion i apply that funny bit and now snoring i'm snoring
i wish to kill this guy i wish to kill this guy by i'm waiting for it thematically all i'm doing is that
i am i i i am shooting down uh a concentrated super acidic pineapple into this pineapple upon ye
that's right
pineapple juice upon ye
citric acid be upon you
did you just crit this thing with a pineapple yeah i think so
38 damage as the pineapple explodes your acid allergy
holy holy start to hear bubbling and just gushing water deep inside of its throat as its stomach
begins to churn yeah yeah it's the end of your turn just like the frog and my turn products gray
gray has gotten a bit of a a better uh idea of what's going on in her surroundings now and she is
uh also concluded that oh that's the problem and uh she will uh fling her mom bailey at uh
kemik and uh oh come on baby
you hit for a total of 30. okay that is my first strike with my haunted prey so make sure that's
a couple things one heart roll me that reflex and so do you gray oh okay
i wrote 10 for a total of 23. i also did a total of 23. you are both grabbed
oh my god can you grab because that's a ranged attack
i mean we're inside the thing i know that is a good there's a good question are you you're throwing
it right just anywhere yeah i'm throwing it you're fine at uh yeah my bad for heart no heart through
a pineapple never mind yeah yeah
it's special pineapple rules sorry the pineapple saves you
i did 23 damage to it and uh i'm gonna swing again uh as it comes back to me she's gonna use
the momentum to just try it again you did 13 to it yes and i did oh i hit again with a total of 28
apparently yeah do that damage yeah yeah yeah that is a total of 13 damage and uh for her final action
uh we're gonna uh we're gonna start moving uh we're gonna start moving toward the tunnel door
now i imagine i have to do a reflex save for that yes okay
as it tries to keep you in as a total of 30 you're grabbed
a little very
kissing your fur
oh no not the fur
okay uh guys i think we need to get the frick out of this thing before it glug glugs us
why did you have to say it like that the mimic hit you with the
walk walk walk reflex please after your movement okay
you're grabbed total of 29. i grabbed i got grabbed with a 30. do you want me to move back
no you're good at the end of your movement you go
what the fuck i'm gonna you just start shooting the floor
yeah go for it okay here we go
worst gun slinger in the west shoots floor
it hits 17 point of damage uh he shoots again
oh that's right he needs to reload he doesn't shoot again he doesn't shoot again he reloads he
reloads end by turn fans the hammer directly into the floor
gotta roll this flat check real quick
you're forgetting about the grab condition
that shot does not happen
attacking isn't a manipulate action
hey what was that oh yeah you're right my bad but but reloading is so beetle didn't
couldn't reload if that is the check for it yeah you're good a lot of tracking
yeah yeah that making an elder mimic is a lot of did you do this did you do this did you do this
did you do this did you do this there's a lot of oh
what the fuck
now it's his turn
he will look to you heart
i just fan him what the fuck yeah you fan him garbage
pineapple is a garbage oh it's you for 32 points of damage
okay uh soren yes i always use my reaction
make a fortitude save please
make a fortitude save with your calcifying sans reaction and he succeeds at the critical success
yeah it makes sense he's good it makes sense he's huge okay roll me this reflexive
at least i take nine uh nine less please rob him to be very safe wait
soren i need to take nine less damage and i need to make math in my head uh no
yes uh but uh uh what what i say i'm i'm at 23 hp wow uh this is gonna matter so much uh yeah let's
let's let's let's let's take this reflex
you're good i got that 26 i am great oh
shit i would grab except the ghost
something something grabbing the ghoulies something something
don't grab the ghoulies hands off the fucking ghoulies
keep your grippers to yourself
okay you got everything figured out yeah heart starts leaking ichor and he has cracks all over his
body as he is slowly dying okay he hits you again oh my god i'm just over here the villain point
that's my last villain point i crit
it's no nice
reaction delay consequences thank you thank that let's see what the damage would be
it's not a matter of wood it's a matter of will oh my god
so what the fun we gotta go we gotta run you delayed 56 points of damage
i don't think we're supposed to fight this thing i think we're supposed to run
now the game master wouldn't put it here if we weren't supposed to fight it
begins to bleed talim you see all around you a very bloodied mouth you guys have been
tearing this thing apart what do you do uh so
i'd like to remind you all you're all still rotten one
yup this is true um
well heart is grabbed um
ray is grabbed beetle is grabbed kalim is the only one who's basically not grabbed at the moment
my spellstrike is down i just used one of my focus pools um
so i think what i'm going to do is i am going to do a series of actions i'm going to
first off go into arcane cascade as my last action was to cast a spell um
and then to leave will raise his shield and uh as he has no means of freeing anybody from grapples and
stuff like that uh i'm just going to target this guy and hope that it's enough and we'll see
you guys have to have a plus 17 to hit oh my god that's a crazy thank you thank you thank you
let's see if you're all high on damage yeah it's oh and uh let's see what the damage is
i'll take average i will take average as uh yeah is basically he stops the flow of time
to keep heart from being just obliterated and um
in what can only assume is a moment of confusion from the mimic he just like lunges in with the
aft coil and just draws it across this fake body um with all the describe to me how you killed this
thing oh my god thank you thank you like kalim raises his shield like he's going to take a defensive
stance and as he does he is actually bringing up the aft coil from the bottom and uh as it hits the body
uh and starts to dig in he will actually hit the trigger on his uh on his hilt so it starts to
disconnect and basically just digs into the flesh as he pulls it up with every ounce of force he can
muster and just lets it rip into beyblade oh my god as the ghost beyblades you see the mouth
is the huge rows of teeth and this ginormous mouth that you were all caught in basically
and the throat just builds up with blood and you see fairy bodies and bones and various things just
kind of pull up in as it like starts to fall down like talim will look at beetle it'd be like it's a
beetle heart needs you now now it's all fine and then the the damage hits and yeah then it's the
anime like the anime of like the wound opening the blood spray boom oh my one motion so because it would
be uh so basically it's late consequence so it would be now heart's turn and then it would hit if i
remember right i think so let me check actually no it hit him there da da da beetle would have a chance
uh so basically you transpose the moment of the roll damage normally da da da uh until the spell
duration lands so the spell ends the target is immediately affected by the attack
and it ends in one round so one will go in beetle will have a chance to go in and heal heart before
the damage goes in so let me take that back thank god not that no he's not alive get rid of that
so there's heart stuff beetle um basically we'll just kind of skip the turns here real quick unless
heart you want to quickly try to heal yourself um so beetle i'm getting out of there sticky
you are no longer grabbed as soon as it dies you everyone's released i'll let beetle do it it's
cooler that way so beetle you rush up the heart uh feel free to hit me a uh like battlefield medicine
will work just fine here for the time put this in your mouth and drink it while i heal you and i'm
gonna pull out my lesser healing potion and i want to give it i want to give it the heart uh okay so we're
still gonna be initiative just for this uh so you move up take out potion yes nine yeah nine for heart
and then i'm going to well heart sippies on his cup yeah i'm gonna treat wounds so we're still in
initiative for it so you moved up took out potion handed the heart okay never mind i don't treat
wounds okay so you don't want to use the potion and you want to try so do you want to use the potion
which only would give you only so much or do you want to try to do run up battlefield medicine no
beetle is a medic beetle has a feat for this where he can run and use battle medicine as to action
that's right i forgot i totally do so let's resend that it's smart feel free to give you back that
potion okay oh okay yeah you just exceed the dc20 so you can heal for 22. it's so that's way better
thank you bro you're gonna die i was we're all gonna die that was really close
beetle dear darling it's okay
so just for that uh just to make sure your action stuff right just to help you out
uh you have battle for medicine which does your thing you have what was that feat you had doctor's
visitation uh you provide immediately care to those in need you stride and use well in the following
battle for medicine so now you've walked and done that all in one turn one action you have two actions
left i don't know if you have anything that allows you to do it twice than somebody also they're getting
additional five hp you can do it twice
yeah so you can do it one more time and i'll add 10 hp to it because you have
five yeah five additional hp i'm gonna do it twice so that will be 27 to you heart let me get that there
here twice there you go
hey because if you didn't heart would have died with this oh god it hurts just like oh i feel it better
like boom the 56 points of damage comes in yeah and ichor like spouts from his mouth as he like
yeah talib like buckles a bit like as he's like he can't hold back the fucking time stream anymore
he's like nah it's all good it's all good i got this yeah we are now out of initiative heart turns
around towards this pit uh just to make sure that this thing dies uh heart will summon uh into the air
will more pineapple be upon you yes like literally uh as some uh heart thematically uh it it can be six
pineapples if we just wanna but um he will summon uh for three actions is jagged berms technically at this
point soren this is um 3d6 times six like like it's six times it it's it's a lot and it doesn't need
to take that damage because it's probably fucking dead but uh just to make sure he drops these into
the maw uh and just to shred it up just to be sure and then uh then then he starts walking out with his
friends you do so and you see the pool of blood that kind of got brought up inside of its mouth
um you send these down the shred whatever's inside and you see the blood will slowly a bit
surely start going down along with all the bodies that you saw we should probably yeah yeah yeah i think
so too i i might be dying so so so so wait all the all the bodies are gone and like everything that
they had on them and everything like that yeah i dropped like i dropped six big mounds down on
them yeah i guess the bodies start to like float down things like oh
as the precious loot disappears and our adventurers begin to kind of recuperate and get away
from this giant mimic uh we're gonna take a break all right we are back now chat i need you to
vote again because i assume our party is still heading through the caves we are yes show us mercy
change now come on you can also spend time you're confident that this mimic is dead if you want to
kind of patch people up real quick if you need i'm gonna do some healing now yes dear god yes please yeah
want to patch yourselves up um yeah as uh as chat votes for your next destination remember on youtube
chat if you go on the twitch chat over twitch.tv for slash narrative declaration um you can go ahead
and take participation in the vote unfortunately on youtube um it just doesn't sync we don't have
you know multi-streaming like this is very difficult for that
like honestly like uh we really have to ask ourselves the question of like should we keep
multi-streaming and that's definitely been a huge question for us understandable
because we're hoping more on youtube side would come over and watch these streams but not that many have
okay okay so you failed two minutes all right no you're doing you're doing insurance on the wrong dc
there from me oh oh you're gonna save like zora's just like hey you got like 30 minutes or something
like that then like telena's good he's fine yeah get your white spindles yeah there's there's a reason
like in the wayfinder were like the first two magic items i bought it saved so much
fucking trouble it's like oh it takes up two investment slots fuck it they eat so worth it
okay so there you go all right you are healed for 55.
whoa it's pretty pong magic compass so you know all right voting will end
you guys have picked number seven let me see oh no lucky number seven come on
come on lucky number seven so come on i don't like that oh he just gave oh so chat
this one that was paid we can get through this one pretty quickly because this is one of those
remember i was talking to you guys before oh yeah yeah yeah no oh you weren't here for it uh basically
i was trying to set something up to where there was more twitch integration stuff i wanted to do
and just in the nature of how programs are just as a quick thing that i try to do all the time i
wanted to find a way for you chat to control what was going on and this was the room for it
oh this is this is the room for it and we're just gonna just get just get through this is mostly like
this is the game master complaining part of the show um so if you see here a character that we were
going to include was good old chet twitch beard oh
his eyes are peeking out for me it's so ominous so the thing that we were gonna do
was i tried to get like five programs to make this work i mean they're too stupid or just all
the tutorials are just like oh yeah you get this program this program now learn coding and it was
super frustrating or they're they're steps with oh you do this and this and you're fine but there's
five other steps that are needed to do the thing that is nowhere on their side so it was super
frustrating and so the entire point was to get tret twitch beard which i'll try to show you what's going
i'll use heart as an example uh to go through all this labyrinthian area to get you all the way
to the green thing so you can let them through and i was gonna let you guys do twitch place pathfinder
by trying to do up down left and right to get to it and see if you could make it but it doesn't work
so chat you want to do me a favor you want to make you feel better you want to just spam up left down
right etc just to make it funny if you if you put in 100 bits people that's the priority move
i on my end it's really funny right they're doing it they're doing uh oh oh there it goes
he's always made it he's always made it he's trying he's trying he went up into the electricity
he almost died up up up up up he made it up we enter a chamber and just see a dwarf run into
electricity and killed himself he's stuck in the corner he's stuck in the corner
sorry sorry i need you to understand that was really funny for me because when he appeared where
i am on the map only half of his face was lit up so he was just menacing in the dark
oh my god is chet just staring out of this like half covered out of the shadows just like
hello
thanks thanks for indulging me chat
you're so smart i can't believe you navigated that extremely difficult mage with nothing but you
know the use of thank you chat i i think chat deserves an applause for that good job chat yeah
good job if you want to vote just type uh the type of number in chat itself and it'll take it for you
it'll like the number on the left by the way the number on the left because things got a little
mixed up now that we have less doors oh yeah it's not going to be straight on perfect so i'm taking out
yeah it's not one for one anymore i'm so sad that you weren't able to get that to work that would
have been wonderful while i was talking everybody on last night because i've been like messing with
the vtuber model stuff and everything and then after i was like okay i need to focus in on this
thing this thing is pissing me off i think i was up to like four or five a.m just bashing my head like
fuck it i can't figure this out oh my god so yeah whatever we get to do this though when they get
to determine your doom i'm gonna have to go through all of that with both viewed and froggy and drawing
y'all's experiences with all of that stuff and i'll probably have to tap pumpkin as well all right voting
is now ending we'll just say this is a weird interlude and it is what number is that five
second elder mimic no please god please no no elder mimics god no so the entire cave system is actually
an elder mimic so your choice of five chat
i'll place them up here
as you guys continue through the cave seeing a random purple dwarf
i kind of wave you by and help you out via a puzzle very good job
it took hours even thank you what a nice cereal box
i'll set the elder back
but as you guys continue on through the caves you exit yourself forward and you see that the ground
you don't even need a perception check for this is filled with hands
the stone hands kind of poke out from the ground itself and on closer inspection you see they're not
completely still even the made of stone they seem to wiggle a little bit just twitch or so but with your
entrance out of this uh into the room you see that some of the hands will quickly twist
towards your towards your direction palm towards you um our bad we'll just go back the way we came
you want to go back sorry our bad yeah this looks like some kind of floor master room you also notice
flanking you guys are two stone heads with gnarled faces you go
oh god i mean it's better than going oh
another one seeks the cross will be to be captured all their last
um yeah you guys haven't happened to see a big group of people go through here have you like two
old ladies a guy makes potatoes haven't seen those types of folks maybe they're lost like you
i hate it but little tidy people try to cross and gone all of them too
why are you like this
um they didn't tell their secrets the interpersonal things if only they said the hands wouldn't grab
and bring them down to their knees you guys want to go back the way we came
i think we should go back the way that we did i'm in agreement
do you dare try to cross back what other hands there could be
i throw beetle down the hallway i think two stone hands come up and grab beetles
rip him in half
no
fucking snap beetle in half like a confetti popper
what the fuck wait what if i i think i have the solution to this puzzle right here we could get
across no problem i'm gonna pull out my gun and i'm gonna point it at one of the heads
something tells you that's not gonna work beetles just like hold on wait i've got this and like
let us through
i do not control i tell you what you need a secret you must tell them in deepest as you can see
i don't like this guy you know what i'm gonna shoot your friend i'm gonna shoot your friend
right in the face you don't want to spy here probably intimidation
what is happening i could do with the the mafioso is showing in beetle
it's only an eight wait i'm here a friend right here what do you think of that i want to hero
point whatever what what what if i blow his stone his head off his shoulder
what if i take your friend right here and i take him over to the gravel factory huh he doesn't come
back the worst part is gonna be when i shoot your friend you're on the wall you can't even look away
but the hands will be alerted they'll see you for who you are with no secrets told you'll be
you'll be going far to the hole that's down beyond what the fuck are these heads yapping about
to cross the cave right forward you must reveal your secrets true or else the hands will know your
lives and take you down with them too we need to tell a secret
with every hand you cross
oh not just a single one to be let through the tax has a high cost
how do we even know if they're telling the truth they'll know
no how do i know that you're telling the truth try us
i had to try you just step into a hand and fucking die
is it your birthday party too huh is it your birthday is it your birthday oh i thought you
would never know it is my birthday
i'm shooting your friend i'm showing you the other head like motions to the other one it's
actually it's our anniversary we're celebrating 259 000 years
yeah just so you know twitch uh the bit bars crashed so
oh no yeah so just hold your bits we all had three hero points
that's right that's crazy something happened to it the twitch connection died and everything else so
something happened they'll just look weird for a bit which api happened
yeah twitch and the server things down so
what if these hands just lead straight to devoc
like i have a have a register of your hero points you ever need to know
it's like i mean we don't know who that is these hands are not his
so we have to tell each hand a secret
the ones you wish to cross i mean i don't keep secrets to any one of you so i don't know if
what counts as a secret that's it i guess it's it's something you keep from us uh you could
come up with a secret right now secrets you see one will say one that you would never share with
anyone else like does it count if i just haven't shared it with anyone and no one because no one has asked
maybe it's a secret if we say it anymore like
there's no longer a secret this room is weird i don't like this room
i'm gonna try it i'm gonna try this yeah give it a shot
i'm gonna try this worst case scenario you know i go through the ground and you know
at this point at this point at this point i i can't i can't i cannot fake the ground
if any funny business happens i'm just gonna kill them i'm just gonna shoot them all right over here
like i'm built different heart gives a thumbs up to beetle at i'm gonna shoot him
heart jumps into the hand
and he and he goes i used to have a boyfriend
several things happen yeah the hand will grab onto you hearts and initially before you can get
the words out this thing is strong this thing you feel like like with your strength checks and
everything you would struggle hard and yeah and you feel like that's like just the major strength these
things have like i won't tell you exactly how you feel but if i were to describe it in my situation
i would feel extreme dread yeah but heart could feel as heart feels it's the moment when you uh when
you your brain tells you this is bad this is bad you should not do this it's bad yeah it's it's that
feeling of i would i almost died yeah i almost died as soon as you say that the hand just
stops and let's go he turns around and he turns around and looks at the rest of you and goes see
yeah yeah it works like no one has asked oh and i just have never told anyone of you hey that works
well what's down there now that you've got a clear path
more hands yeah but if you don't step on those heads can you go further down i mean i guess but
yeah what's down there i don't know like when i looked at this hat he looks down at the fingers and
he goes the stone heads giggle yeah i'm i'm gonna be honest you guys like i'm i'm pretty sure that these
hands could like kill me if they wanted to i don't like the sound of that is there an exit that way heart
is there is there an exit let me go look you step again and another hand looks to you
uh i ain't in your vicinity yet he points at the hand
let me get let me get past for a quick moment okay i just want to check i'll tell you later
i need two eyes to pass by immediately turns to you and grabs your leg
uh when that happens uh he looks back at the rest of his friends
and tell her secret he stares into gray's eyes and goes i think of you as my mom even though i never
had one i don't know what that means it lets you go great kind of just gives like a little aww
i don't know what a mom is but i am sure that you're one
so as this is going on to lean is like watching and seeing how this works is this like if you pass by
a hand or you enter into the space of a hand like where it is like actually what you're noticing is
that if you go adjacent to it like if you go think of all these hands have an attack of opportunity
think of it that way yeah i don't like that how high is the ceiling zord you want to test that
i'm just asking how high is the ceiling oh yeah can you just fly over though you want to gamble
say about 15 feet 15 feet okay
well first off clean was gonna like go let heart you know like check stuff
see if there's an exit over there or anything like that
like looking around like hmm okay so so heart you've already kind of pushed up a little bit
um with your vision it's been pretty hard to see even further down without a light source
yeah so uh i remember the thing i don't have a torch
to snap his fingers and cast light on heart
he's like he's like wait a moment yeah
oh no i need my magic there it is
oh well all right well i can't slide
heart gets uh white starting screen flashbang
you know now that light's on you you see further on uh that there is a exit on the other side
you barely see the edge of it of course you also see more heads as one looks to you and goes
you're paying the tax you're paying the tax you're almost out of here
you must cross and admit all of your fears
okay so if i'm counting correctly here everyone if you go the same way as i did um you will have
to say heart points and counts on his hand and uh eight truths oh my god
i mean that ain't that hard
it's like of course it's not that hard yeah dude well i mean it is that hard you know especially if
you're you know you don't keep a lot of secrets and you know like yeah exactly like me yes
it's harder the more honest you are you know yeah you're a very upstanding citizen and you'll
hold nothing back like in telemo actually like turned one of the heads and was like what if you don't
have any secrets that's a lie he will like put a finger up and like hold it towards and like
hold it towards gray's face it's like but a valid question as he's like looking as he's looking at
the head he's like what if you don't have any secrets if you're that of pure of heart and had nothing
from the wide world then you are able to pass freely but we all know that's not true
to lean just like blusters like
gray's gonna take a step forward now she's gonna start going towards
the hand because yeah the hand uh so i have to be on the tile next so we're doing this more of a
role-playing deal just kind of get you guys through it so okay okay
so for this one hand turns to you and she will say completely deadpan
i have left one of my partner's mothers in the wilderness because i didn't like her
the hand kind of does his finger like damn and then let's go
i would like to scoot um yeah you go behind heart there yeah
anyone else want to go forward yeah beetle will
the hands can you squeeze me a little more gently please
i actually have deep insecurities about the way i look and i never wear pants because i think my legs
are my greatest feature
i like your feet bro they're pretty cool yeah everything else is all ugly and scruggly and
up but my legs came out looking pretty good no there's a little steppy slap on the hand on the
palm of the head no dude you you look fine i feel pretty ugly okay that's sad i wasn't fishing for
compliments look i'm just telling my secrets okay don't look at me don't look at me stares at him
the hand lets you go
come on to leave it's not that hard to lean like it's like you like waves at heart he's like no no
no you go ahead you know it's it's fine you know i'm just i'll just wait for everybody else to
just give him a look the exit is over here i i have my own ways i'm i'm no you don't get moving
no i it's perfectly fine is it about paying taxes i believe we already know you don't pay your taxes
to lean like just he like looks away like lifts his nose up and just crosses his arms
all right i guess we're leaving you i was this close to do i would you do it for a gold coin
scooby snack bit but i held myself back to leave if you get through this whole room i'll give you this
and he holds up a small ruby you're so smart i'm taking your idea how much how much is that ruby worth
uh a hundred gold pieces
a hundred pieces
he kind of like looks at it and he's like
no he no he goes if if i so you're saying if i get through all this you'll give me that ruby
uh yep
oh no i'm going to throw the ruby further down into the cave to leave you better get moving
is that are you is that a deal yep regardless of what truths are revealed yep
to lean like
step into the hand i almost sold beetle to the walk and he'll continue past
and then uh as the next hand like is as this hand grabs him i almost sold i almost sold great to the
the book she just stares at him gobsmacked the hands the first one lets you go but the other hand
keeps you firm wait did i not almost so great to the book i don't think so oh i think you only almost
sold beetle yeah it was definitely just beetle i thought i almost sold all three of you it seems
it's not quite satisfied is it truly a secret to hold maybe they all witness your deeds unfold
but what is even darker than the thoughts to behold
heart stares at him you want to sell me right
like like does the like the like the head tilt like looks at heart is just like i thought about it
it keeps you there
to leave it's gonna drag you under the ground if you don't tell it something
to help you along uh for thought wise because i don't want you to overthink it yeah um whenever
whenever you like say for example you see someone for a thing it's like it's like you may think of
things which is one thing is thoughts that to yourself and you would battle with a with a thing
but then there's actually something you commit to that cleared up nothing you just babbled at me
i don't understand either so say for example i was gonna like i have the option to sell beetle or not
right there is serious consideration for it but then there's the act of actually selling a beetle and
then actually persevering if not it's a deep secret sort of deal you want to tell somebody yes i sold beetle
yeah it's like someone put in bad thoughts aren't much secrets
it got to be willing to argue with you on that but at the same time it's the show so i'm not
um you through one hand to lean was just like
come on doesn't need to be i still hold a grudge for all of you letting me be eaten by zombies
i'll let you go you know that's fair no that's her
i'll let you go and you may proceed yo i'm uh i'm like to lean just like ushers everybody forward
it's like i expect that ruby at the end come on hurry up time to go oh my god oh my god okay geez
i am my father's weakest creation and i am an attempt of him trying to make the weakest creature
he possibly could and i it it makes me question my existence sometimes doesn't even touch you it's
like oh it's like oh
but but i'm growing stronger right haha yeah it grabs your leg
it lets you it lets you go there's a bit
yeah yeah i i'm not actually supposed to know that i was never supposed to know that that's
that's just what one of my adopted dads told me before he went away it's kind of a dick thing to say
yeah but it makes sense
uh you can go past the hand art i'm a little flesh sack but to me you you don't look like the
weakest creation anybody could have made you're like you're literally a brick i don't want to that's
scary i don't like they're tougher than you that's scary you're like you're as tough as can be while
still being able to blend in and function within society i was meant to look i was you know made in
to look like a guy like i was sculpted as like a little baby right yeah he just makes them big and
strong to begin with oh yeah oh that's weird yeah no yeah yeah yeah um yeah is gonna start moving
again so she's gonna go past uh this hand here
and uh she's going to say
my mother died when i was very young and i was raised by two men at the head of our tribe
oh it keeps you held which is actually great oh she kind of looks around um
these three have become far more family than any of my children ever were
i don't know what's going to do to lean like whips around it lets you go
great like what the bro like
like like follows her with his eyes and he's just like you have to think about it because like
they go off on their own she barely gets to know them when they're adults so damn heart looks down
at her as she comes by for real yes for really real
he he rubs away some tears oh god okay
try to see if you can jump over them with your cool wings oh that's smart he's gonna try and do like uh
hold on let me do a i think it's athletics just scramble up the wall and try and glide over yeah
he does an athletics check he's gonna try and do a a long little a long jump with his little flappy
flap flaps a little flap flap flap flap but then he lands he lands right next to the hand so i can
yank him anyway
you see as you jumped up the hand begins to go up and it goes oh you're gonna be right all right
he's gonna grab you
gleam swears under like swears under his lack of breath
i uh uh i i i wish my father hadn't blown himself up and was present throughout my life
it holds you no that's understandable what do you want from me
i i sometimes i i wish my mom had blown up instead of my dad because i'm tired of just
working for her and earning her money and when is it going to be time to live my own life
it lets you go heart gives beetle that what oh buddy
beetle that's the entire reason you've been with us what
anyway it's somebody else's turn to step into a hand
beetle that's like every single time people have asked why are you here that's the answer you we don't
have to talk about it let's if we do let's do it when we leave out of this room yeah that makes
sense i'm telling them the secret's not you keep moving okay okay okay um uh uh uh
he takes a step forward into this hand
the giant the giant blacksmith that we met is the first giant i've ever met i i've never met my father
if i'm gonna be honest even though i everything i do is mainly for him
except on up until now and he turns back and looks at them
and i sort of do things for you guys now
it lets you go slowly as if
determining if that's good enough for it and it lets you go
i i i don't know if i even relate to giants that much anymore
inanimate stone hands are pretty fucking judgmental like they're pretty picky
i don't know if i deserve that flame that i was given if it was given to me because i'm a giant or not
because i don't think i relate to them that much anymore
hey this is this is hurting me a little bit oh
emotional damn
um heart holds out a hand towards gray like it's okay great walks forward
and i think i have to talk to this hand
see i think
yeah you're in the spirit range yeah yeah yeah yeah uh it's just i've been losing track of who's done what
gray was actually the keyboard player for michael jackson's bad
my god i uh no way uh she she takes his hand and as she's passing the hand or is in front of it
she will quietly go i have been emotionally numb for two decades
it lets you pass
thank you yippee
yeah just uh make room because you guys gonna go for it anyway thank you thank you
okay like these these hands will let you guys through oh look there's then there's exit ha ha
for teleman beetle you have two hands to get through yeah come on beetle it's not that hard
okay can you all stop listening for a second no
okay
like he looks away like he's like he's like i didn't hear anything i i i i mean yeah yeah
don't pay attention to what i'm about to say okay i'm not listening
sometimes i sometimes i split off from the group to quote unquote go go pee but i'm actually peeling off my scabs and eating them
and a disgusted emote for the hand it lets you buy he looks truly ashamed oh buddy
he just basically did the kobold equivalent of admitting that in his 30s he still eats his boogers
he's a reptile he basically goes i eat my malt he's like
yeah that's that's normal but like for them they're like they're like oh yeah
it's only him as you're going forward one of the hands don't grab you
but the other one stops your way
so what this one you're going here yeah
but that that one like grabs nataline and he's like
if they wanted posters that had a higher price on them i would have turned everyone into the tyrants guild
what the
what the fuck to leave i was back from being dead for a second time
i was mad what's wrong with you
i just we
i had to take an irl damage the hand lets you go
my number wasn't high enough no you're more useful than the gold i would have gotten
it's not our fault that you got eaten
so he snorts we were trying to save you
he's like in the bag he's like everybody else got out but no i'm the only one who got eaten
by all by all accounts you do have a shield you are you are the tank falling star
yeah don't worry about it a word i heard someone say once in the market
it sounded big
ah you guys have one more hand to pass before you can exit
beetle fucking shoves his friends out of the way it runs into it dives into the pub
my latest secret is even though i died i'm not bitter about it and i think less of to leave
because to leave is so bitter about how he died on that one excursion with us and that's not very fair
so leave like stands in the back and he's all hot he's like i've still died more times than you have
i'm not sitting here like oh i died during this altercation because i happened to get targeted for
this one thing and i died i'm gonna sell you i'm gonna rat you out you already have a one up on us
beetle that's kind of obvious i think way less of you right now way less of you right now well
now it's not a secret but it was for a fraction of a second shame on you to leave
i'm getting a lot of no's that's not a secret
as beetle is just like it it's what is it the grab emo where like
you got somebody that's sticking out the hands got beetle like that just the hand is starting to
drag him under and he's still like boy it just grips beetle like his eyes puff off a little bit more
yeah it keeps chat it's determined it keeps you held i i mean oh gosh it's getting hard to breathe i i
i think i think it's mildly concerning that our go-to solution is violence is that a secret chat
that's not a secret that's a lie you are the one pulling out the gun he's allowed to be concerned
that that's where it's gone yeah that that's not no no on the secret department help i don't know
any other secrets help i'm gonna die little your bed is gonna get you killed i'm really scared
heart grips onto the fingers and tries to pull it pry it open as hard as he can
i can't think of anything else i can't think of anything else i'm going to die i'm gonna die
you know what maybe i'm actually not that scared it lets you go
it's more of a lie than anything but still grabs the hand by the fingers drag me under i've been
down here for months send me into the light i don't want the gem to bring me back squeeze me squeeze me
heart picks up beetle and hugs them a little bit
beetle just starts ugly kim kardashian crying like a seagull yeah yeah
all right who's next
i guess i'm gonna walk on top of beetle uh or at least next to him uh oh sorry a heart picked
him up yeah is that much room on the map i get you we'll just roll playing like you're going through
the cave gray walks up to the hand and her body kind of slacks a little bit she looks like she's
kind of lost some of the life in her and she kind of just goes yo same z's i'm very old i'm very tired
and i just want to die already
it's a stupid part of it it's like the mouth makes that hand move or like that mouth hand
move it goes yeah same man it lets you go
just lets you go
bela are you old no but you said same the will to live is just are we ever going to see the sun again
so like this like this is the exit right yes yeah they're just moving out of the way because
because of how the token size of the map we're role playing as if the tokens are going through
so like are the others like standing at like the like the entrance like wait for everybody to
okay all right so talim will like look at heart he'll step into the hand and he will lock eyes with
beetle and uh he'll go he doesn't it's like it doesn't matter
who thinks less of me because no one can think less of me than i do myself
fuck you man my last act in life
was to sell my fellow man and he will just
what
so the hand will grip you as if enraged but it lets you go
and thalim will just brush past
you're just gonna pull out that ruby and storm after talim
does gray also walk by
well yeah everyone's in the cave yeah
uh whenever when everyone just runs
past like after talim heart goes into the hand and realizes that he hasn't said anything to this hand
so he's standing there alone with his hand gripping around his leg
and he looks down at it
and when no one else is around
he says
i think i want to kill my father
jesus christ
does talim stop for beetle
nope
so with talim marching forward into the cave
beetle rushing after talim holding up a gem
heart and gray having a moment as they also continue through the cave
we will see how this concludes next time on rock goons
my social anxiety and phoning response toward talim no
and now we know why talim rushed in after that last batch of traitors
oh
when the fan started to rumble
with that thank you chat so much
for watching this episode of rock goons hope you guys enjoyed yourselves
you can type one in chat or leave us a comment or so saying so
i'd like to reintroduce the amazing plays and go watch
watch them on their streams and socials starting off with minerva
it's me again hello i am minerva aka
party demoness you can find me under all those socials it has been
oh this was the episode of all time my heart hurting a little bit
and then of course we have the amazing cabal
hello my name is cabal i'm your favorite frightening caffeinated cult leader and
hooded horror host here on the terrifying petrifying purple platform of twitch.tv
you can find me under cabal on all of my socials
of course we have a recent little guy froggy luck
good time zone everybody i'm froggy lock i i'm still a professional artist
are you sure here on twitch but you can find me on all other sources of social media platforms
on the exact same handle today i played beatles above the level eight cobalt investigator i hope
you have a wonderful rest of your day of course we have our amazing salty job
my baby's daddy's job and i'm a funny artist you can find me at salty job on twitter and i am
also returning to streaming you can find me at salty job on twitch as well
yay
all right and salty's assets are so cute i can't wait
they're pretty good they're really good i'm stressed out i don't want to leave this session while
they're fighting i know that's why i was like oh no my fawning response
my blarbos my blarbos are fighting the moment you were just like well i think less of you and i was like
like that's it
yeah
it's time for that reveal
it's time to pull the trigger
i was just like i've had this one loaded for a while
of course i've been your host and game master for the endings on the bear remember july 8th
uh i'm like dating episodes too much but july 8th 2024 um basically i'm coming back to streaming
and also announcing what other little adventures that we're doing and stuff for narrative declaration
so you guys are curious about what we're doing in the in-between because we got some like weird
gap and stuff with hiatuses and stuff and campaigns slowing down and everything and uh remember if you
want to support us and even watch us continue to play some pathfinder uh you can support our kingmaker
campaign at patreon.com for slash narrative declaration or catch up on some raccoons stuff
like that kind of see what other adventures that we have on youtube at youtube.com for
slash narrative declaration and with that thank you all so very much for watching supporting sorry
that our bit bars died and disappeared i have to go check to see if twitch's api crashed somewhere
i love you all so very much and we will see you all next time so long farewell bye-bye we'll see you
next time goodbye stay safe stay healthy take care bye bye don't eat scabs just do it do it do it do it do it