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What if you could get more of what you want in life? But not through pushing, forcing, or pressure.
You can.
When it comes to money, time, and energy, no one’s gonna turn away more.
And Kate Northrup, Bestselling Author of Money: A Love Story and Do Less and host of Plenty, is here to help you expand your capacity to receive all of the best.
As a Money Empowerment OG who’s been at it for nearly 2 decades, Kate’s the abundance-oriented best friend you may not even know you’ve always needed.
Pull up a chair every week with top thought leaders, luminaries, and adventurers to learn how to have more abundance with ease.
Money has to move. It's always moving. It never stops moving. Now there are times when it stops moving to you and why would that be? Because you're not investing in being investable.
Darnyelle Harmon:Like, there are things that we do. If you go to a restaurant, I don't care if the waitress is snotty. Give her a tip because money has to move. When someone gives you a compliment, I don't care if the dress is 20 years old and you haven't been able to fit it. Just say thank you.
Darnyelle Harmon:So that money, the energy of abundance, because that's what a compliment is, it's the energy of abundance, so that it keeps moving.
Kate Northrup:Today, I have doctor Darnielle Jervi Harmon, and her name literally means the secret place where dreamers go to dream. Wow. She is the best selling author of Move to Millions, the founder of an incredible company that is on the Inc 5000 list, and she works with entrepreneurs to get to the $1,000,000 mark. Her work around spirituality and money is some of the most profound I have ever experienced, and I can't wait for you to experience it in this episode. Welcome to Plenti.
Kate Northrup:I'm your host, Kate Northrup, and together, we are going on a journey to help you have an incredible relationship with money, time, and energy, and to have abundance on every possible level. Every week, we're gonna dive in with experts and insights to help you unlock a life of plenty. Let's go fill our cups.
Voiceover:Please note that the opinions and perspectives of the guests on the Plenty podcast are not necessarily reflective of the opinions and perspectives of Kate Northrop or anyone who works within the Kate Northrop brand.
Kate Northrup:Darnell, Thank you for being here.
Darnyelle Harmon:I'm so excited to be here, Kate.
Kate Northrup:So I've just had you in my ear. I've been, like, snuggling up with you at bedtime reading your book, And I wanna start with, you said something on your podcast recently. I'm sure you say it a lot, but I'd never heard anybody say it in just this way, which is money is a mirror. Money is a mirror. Mhmm.
Kate Northrup:What do you mean by that?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. So the way you see money is about the way you see yourself. So if you feel unworthy, then you see money as a source of lack. Right? I believe money flows away from those who feel that there's a shortage of it.
Darnyelle Harmon:And if you see yourself as a shortage, I e, I'm not worthy, you're gonna see money the same exact way. So we've heard it said before, you know, money just amplifies. It gives you more of what you already are. So if you are mean, money's gonna make you mean it. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:If you are benevolent, money's gonna make you much more benevolent and philanthropy, whatever the word is. Yeah. You know? You know what I'm trying to say. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:And I think with money being a mirror, it's just gonna make you more of who you already are. Like, so the people who come into money but aren't used to having money, don't understand money, have always seen money as a source of frustration or mindset doesn't it doesn't matter where you came from and whether you were born into money or not. Yeah. Right? That's why lack mindset doesn't it doesn't matter where you came from and whether you were born into money or not.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's how you see yourself as a reflection through the money that you have, even the things you buy. Like, when we're faking it until we make it, for those of us who believe that, I hate that phrase.
Kate Northrup:You too.
Darnyelle Harmon:Oh my gosh. It drives me crazy. I'm, like, no. Why don't you just be it? Anyway
Kate Northrup:Yes. Not faking it. It's actually being it now.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. Just be it right now because that'll make it come so much faster if you would just be it. Right? But when we are faking it till we're making it, we gotta have all the labels. And we think that by having the labels, it's gonna make people think that we're suddenly worthy.
Darnyelle Harmon:But guess what? You're still not worthy. You just have nice shoes or a nice handbag or the right belt. Right? And so for me, the reason why I love talking about money so much is because I know what it's like to not have, and I know what it's like to have a lot.
Darnyelle Harmon:And I'm the same person on both sides of it, and that's the important thing that I want people to understand.
Kate Northrup:And what shifted inside you or in your behavior to have the experience of experiencing having a lot? Because you do you know, you have a multimillion dollar business. You teach people how to create that in a really strategic systemized way. Very organized. I love it.
Kate Northrup:As someone who doesn't think as systematically, I'm, like, in great respect. So was there anything in particular that shifted inside you given that you are obviously the same person Right. As before? But what made the difference?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. I I think the biggest thing that changed was that I stopped believing everything other people told told me about money. Right? And and when I say other people, I mean my parents. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:That's where we first learn our whatever we believe our relationship to be with money, it's inherited. It's not even our own. It's whatever we we were taught and we caught. Right? And so I was taught that you have to work hard for money.
Darnyelle Harmon:I caught that money is never there for us. Right? I grew up poor, should have technically have been middle class because my dad made really great money at his job, but he was an addict. So he smoked all of his extra money, and so that left us with no frills for cornflakes from the supermarket. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:And so as a result of that, I took all of those lessons, and then all you need is a glimpse of possibility that what you thought to be true isn't, and that's enough to start unraveling the thread and turning the sweater into a ball of yarn. Right? And that's exactly what happened. I started to unravel the threads and realized that that wasn't actually it. I remember when I got to corporate America and I was told you have to work hard for money.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? You you have to show up. You have to be there 16 hours a day because that's what we in the United States, we think is living. Right? When you work to live, so wrong.
Darnyelle Harmon:But, anyway, I I played the game just like everyone else and but, eventually, I got burnt out. And I'm, like, okay. There's this can't be the way that it is. I started looking at the people who were truly wealthy, not the facade wealthy people because they had all the labels. And I recognized that what was different about them was the way they looked at money.
Darnyelle Harmon:So I believe that poor people see money as just the mechanism to pay their bills, and that's all it's about. I just gotta pay these bills. If I could pay my bills right? Middle class people still wanna pay their bills, but they wanna pay their bills in order to extend good credit so they can live beyond their means. But wealthy people, they wanna make their money move.
Darnyelle Harmon:They see money as a mechanism to create more money. And so when I started to invest, put money out there so that it could move because it's a flow, it's a currency, it's an energy, I noticed that it didn't require me to work hard in order to make more money. So I stopped, and I started challenging all of those beliefs.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Was there one particular person or a few particular person, people who were that example that helped you unwrap begin to unravel that sweater?
Darnyelle Harmon:Just to ask the questions, and they were, like, people who were far far away, not anyone I knew personally. I did not ever know anyone who was wealthy than for I don't know how long. Now I listen to a book a week more than I actually read a book a week, but, but there was a few people really early on. I've always been a follower of Warren Buffett, like, always, and just he lives so simply. Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:And I'm just, like, okay. If his simplistic living is creating more, let's unpack what are the things that are happening. Right? And and so I became a millionaire before I had a $1,000,000 company because I learned how to invest, and I learned how to put my money in the right places. And even when I filed bankruptcy, which we may get into or not Oh, we will.
Kate Northrup:I too. Because you just brought it up.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right. Well yeah. And I I brought it up on purpose because it used to be a source of shame, and now it's it's liberation. Yes. But even when I filed bankruptcy, I still had assets that were making a 1,000,000 of dollars because I didn't have to report my 401 k Right.
Darnyelle Harmon:Which was well invested. You know what I mean? And so for me, I think the biggest thing that has made the difference watching people or not watching the people is that we put too much emphasis on money. And if we would just stop making it a god Yeah. And just let it be energy, everything would change.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. And you do have a very strong relationship with God. I do. And money, but God I do. First, obviously.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yes. And because of my relationship with God, I have a strong relationship with money because God talks about money, wealth, and possessions 23100 times in the Bible. And what do
Kate Northrup:you think is some of the misunderstanding? Because it's such a common conditioning to believe that it is more pious, more spiritual to not have money. Where does that come from? Is it a misunderstanding of the Bible? No.
Kate Northrup:What's going on?
Darnyelle Harmon:I I don't think it's a misunderstanding of the Bible. I believe that religion is an interpretation of what it is that God said. And so when we think about Catholicism which Christianity has its roots in Yeah. Catholicism says you are more holy if you are poor, Right? That's why the monks and the nuns take a vow of giving up everything to go and follow God.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? Because that's what they believe will get you closer to heaven. But and either or, we could cancel out that statement or we could keep that statement and say, and from the beginning of the bible, from Genesis chapter 2, God starts talking about money, wealth, and possessions because it's something that we need to normalize. Money is only a a thing and a stigma if you think that it's it's beneath or above you. Again, how you see money is about the way you see yourself.
Darnyelle Harmon:So if I could get you to see yourself the way that god sees you, then money won't be this thing that is arduous and hard for you to reach for. Instead, it'll become one with you. And once you're in alignment to it, it flows consistently in your life experience. And but most people don't wanna believe that. So to your answer your original question, I think the scripture that jacks most people up is first Timothy 6 and 10, which says, for the love of money is the root of all evil, for they that coveted after have erred from the faith and that has caused them sorrow.
Darnyelle Harmon:The problem with reading that scripture at face value because, sure it does save the love of money, but the problem is the bible was written in 3 languages and English wasn't one of them. So we're translating and just like when you have a conversation with Mike and something gets lost in translation, the same thing happened in the bible. So in translation, for the love of money got misinterpreted. The word is actually the word avarice, a v a r I c e. If we look that word up in the dictionary, it actually means extreme greed.
Darnyelle Harmon:So what the scripture really says is extreme greed is the root of all evil, and Darnielle doesn't disagree with that. Yeah. Right? In that same chapter, Timothy, who's a new leader in the church, is being mentored by Paul, and Paul is preparing him because his territory is filled with wealthy people. He wants Timothy to understand what to do with the wealthy people when they come.
Darnyelle Harmon:So if we go down to verse 17 through 21, god gives the edicts, if you will, of what to tell the rich people because it's okay to have money. He says 3 things. He says, number 1, don't be arrogant or high minded. Number 2, do good deeds. And number 3, remember the source of your wealth.
Darnyelle Harmon:That's all we have to do to have money, but we wanna gloss over that because of all the other scriptures, and I believe and I'm proud I say this on lots of podcast, but and it may get someone's panties in a bunch. I don't really care. But I believe that religion is designed to separate and to create fear for man made gain. And so often what we experience is especially because often the people who are in religion are not reading the word and learning and building a relationship with God for themselves. They're taking whatever the man or woman at the front of church of the church is saying as if it's the law.
Darnyelle Harmon:That is very dangerous to do, and I can only say this because I used to be one of them. The only time I opened my Bible was at church, and I was the girl who's, like, where's Genesis? Genesis is the first book of the Bible. And I'd be, like, where do I go when they're like, turn to Genesis 1 and 1. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:Is that in the back? Because I didn't have my own personal relationship. Right? And so today that now that I do and as I read the the word and I study it and I understand and I seek what god is saying, I don't have to take what the man or woman at the front of the church is saying as if it's the law. We always should be discerning and trying the spirit by the spirit.
Darnyelle Harmon:And some people, they get it exactly right. Some people get it wrong, and we're human. Of course. We don't all always get it right. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:So this isn't an attack on religion, but I think it is dangerous and it's irresponsible to have a religious affiliation with Christianity without having a relationship with God.
Kate Northrup:I agree. So beautiful. What happened for you when you began? What was that moment like, and what was going on in your life when you started to have a personal relationship with God?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. You did read my book. Okay. So so I was engaged to be married the first time. Uh-huh.
Darnyelle Harmon:And 3 months before my wedding, my ex fiance confessed that he had gotten an older woman in our church pregnant. And so I know everybody let me pause for dramatic effect. Yeah. So 3 months before the wedding, he's gotten this older woman pregnant. Now what's exciting not exciting, but what's important to note is that 9 months before that, I got pregnant.
Darnyelle Harmon:Okay. And had an abortion. I made the choice to have an abortion because he was adamant that he didn't want to have children at we're, like, 23, 24 years old. Right? Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:And I, you know, I did it because I didn't wanna be like my mom and my sisters who all had all these babies by all these men that weren't taking care of them, and I didn't want that for myself. And so I did make a very tough choice and regretted it almost instantly and even, you know, when my husband and I were trying to get pregnant and we weren't able to get pregnant was, like, oh my gosh, it's because I had that abortion back in the day. Although, that was my own stuff and it wasn't God's. But anyway Yeah. As a result of that circumstance, I decided I I knew immediately, Kate, that it wasn't done to me.
Darnyelle Harmon:It was done for me. I was so clear that I believe that salvation, which, you know, is big in the faith realm, is when God snatches you out of harm's way. And I believe that that man would have harmed me, not necessarily physically or emotionally, but he would have detracted from the destiny that I was supposed to be on because I have free will, and I could have made that choice. And so god loved me so much that he was unwilling, and he also knew that unless something cataclysmic happened, I was gonna marry that fool. And so he had to create something really cataclysmic Dramatic.
Darnyelle Harmon:In order to get my attention. Right? And so but that was the thing. And so when all of that happened and the dust started to settle, I was very clear that it wasn't God who did this to me, he did it for me. And as a result, it kinda it kinda made me fall in love with him and I wanted to know him and know him better.
Darnyelle Harmon:And so for me, my onset was not just Christianity. I studied everything because I wanted to understand, you know, who is god? I believe that there's only one god, true and living. I believe that people through religion choose to serve that God in different ways and I think it's everybody's business to decide how they wanna build their relationship with God. As for me I have chosen that my center is still based in Christianity So I say I subscribe to the doctrines of Christianity.
Darnyelle Harmon:I do love Jesus. I do believe in Jesus, but I'm not religious and I'm not going to follow any writs and rituals just because you said I should. I'm gonna see what what the word has to say and and how that is indoctrinated into how I live. I do have a true desire to to honor and please God with everything that I am. It's the only outcome I'm attached to that he would get the glory from my life and from my life experience.
Darnyelle Harmon:And I believe that being present and vocal about things like money and even my relationship with God is gonna open up an opportunity for other people to explore theirs. For sure. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:For sure. Something I've heard you talk about is being obedient, and that's not something that was, like, in my lexicon. I've I've heard you speak about it and also, my friend, Jerisha Haak.
Darnyelle Harmon:Do you know you know Jerisha? Jerisha.
Kate Northrup:Yes. So, I honestly, like, hadn't heard that before because I didn't grow up in a church, and and I love it so much. Mhmm. And so I'm just curious. Can you speak more about what it means to you to be obedient and how you're following that these days in your business and in your life?
Darnyelle Harmon:I think I believe that obedience is doing right. I think it's really simple. I think we complicate so many things. And I think that when you are I mean, we're all human. I was gonna say when you're a human.
Darnyelle Harmon:I think that as humans
Kate Northrup:During those times in your life.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right. Right. Right. I think that as humans, we all know right from wrong, and we all know the results of choosing wrong over right. I believe that obedience is making a decision to do what's right even when it doesn't feel good, even when it doesn't make sense.
Darnyelle Harmon:And and and that to me is obedience because I am I have chosen to be in alignment with God. Meaning, I know who I am, I know what I was sent here to do, and I've decided to operate in accordance to that mandate that was placed on my life before I was even thought of by my parents. Right? The scripture says in Jeremiah 1 and 5, before you were formed in your mother's womb, god knew you and approved you, which means and I know you can get behind this, Kate. Like, we came here as abundance.
Darnyelle Harmon:We came here approved. Like, there's nothing wrong with us. Now some of us grew up in families where we were taught that something is wrong with us because of whatever our parents were going through in the mirror we presented for them, and that flowered our own opinion of ourselves and make us question who we are. But I think in true sincerity and honoring the alignment of who we are, we know the difference between right and wrong. And obedience is just doing what's right.
Darnyelle Harmon:Mhmm. Right? Like, I know I should drink 8 glasses of water a day. Being obedient means I'm gonna drink 8 glasses of water every day. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:Obedience means I know that if I have a team of people that I've hired, I'm going to pay them well so that they can live. Right? Like, I think we know right from wrong And so for me, obedience is really, I break it down a a little differently in the book. I talk about it being operational obedience. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:So operating your business as the CEO recognizing that the e isn't for everything. It's for executive. Right? It's for strategically presiding over the vision that is your business and putting yourself in position to actually be the executive presiding over your business. And in order to be the executive, you can't be in the day to day.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? You can't be the one serving the clients. Now there's a point in time where we all every CEO started out doing the very thing that now other people do because that's the only way we could create standard operating procedures. But there has to come a point in time where you get higher. You rise above the day to day within your organization so that can actually facilitate an environment for it to grow.
Darnyelle Harmon:And so obedience is doing right. It's customer service. Right? It's it's leadership. It's being understanding.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's recognizing that, yes, you might create policies and procedures, but you're a human being interacting with other human beings. And because you're a human, you can decide to act like a human and not like a business and stand behind the policy if the right thing to do is to support a person in a different way. And so I allow that to be my guidepost for everything that it is that I do every single day, and it also allows our team to operate within the core values that we've established as a company.
Kate Northrup:I wanna go back to the story that you dropped in about filing bankruptcy Mhmm. And and what what happened there. And then I love the side note, which I didn't know that you also, meanwhile, were doing that with, like, still a net worth of over a1000000. I mean, that's just, like Don't tell anyone. The juiciest and, like, very subversive in the most beautiful way.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah.
Kate Northrup:So just tell me the story of that, and, and what was the greatest gift you received from that chapter?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. So I am a money teacher. Right? I am it is my anointing. It is my gift.
Darnyelle Harmon:And in order to teach money, I had to have experienced everything with money. Right? So I recognize that everything that I've been through up and through my life was so that I could use it as a point of teaching someone else. Right? So having said that, you know, like many of us here in the United States, I think the statistics say 63% of adults live paycheck to paycheck.
Darnyelle Harmon:We're financially illiterate. We do not understand money. I was too. So went to college on a full academic scholarship, spent no money to go there except on the quad very early in my academic collegiate career, got a credit card for the t shirt, $500 limit turned in $25100 limit turned it in a 5,000, 10000, 25,000. Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:By the time I was graduating from college, I had enough credit card debt to have paid student loans or to have been having to pay student loans off. Yeah. By the time I was 30, I had a quarter of a $1,000,000 in credit card debt. I am not proud to say that to you. I bought a lot of things, and, unfortunately, Kate, they weren't Gucci and Prada.
Darnyelle Harmon:The things that I bought were, like, paying someone's light bill or taking all my friends on a vacation, like, flossing for love, for lack of a better way to describe it. Looking for love in all the wrong places. I'm a middle child. We are invisible in a lot of ways, and add to that, the fact that my mom went to jail during my 8th birthday party, and so I had significant abandonment issues, and all I wanted was to be loved. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:Maslow's hierarchy of needs at its best. That's all I wanted was that sense of security and to know that I belonged. And the way that I felt belonging was through buying things for other people, and it added up to $250,000. I robbed Peter to pay Paul until I just couldn't keep the ball moving anymore. And I it was coming very crucial to the point where they were gonna start going to find the money, and they would have found my investment accounts.
Darnyelle Harmon:So I did the unthinkable. I didn't wanna do it. I used to work in a bank. I had a 800 credit score, so much shame and guilt and all the things, but I did it. And believe it or not, god actually told me to do.
Darnyelle Harmon:He actually, in my spirit, very clear that this was what I needed to do. And that's when I resolved to do it, when I felt in alignment to it. And it was the best thing that ever happened to me, and here's why. So I was able to follow chapter 7, which means everything got discharged. Praise the lord.
Darnyelle Harmon:Hallelujah. They could have taken my house and my car, but the trustee didn't. I was able to stay in my home and keep my car as long as I made the payments, and I was forced to take a financial literacy course. Now I do not know if this trustee ever gave that mandate to anyone else who came in his trustee court, but I know he gave it to Darnielle Antoinette. I think I think he felt sorry for me.
Darnyelle Harmon:I think he looked at the fact that I was, like, 30 some years old, and I had a quarter of a $1,000,000 in credit card debt. And he's like, if we don't teach this girl about money, she'll be back in my my trusty courtroom in the future. And so the course that I took, there were 2 textbooks. 1 was just, you know, basic generic money, like how to budget and those types of things. And the other book was A Happy Pocket Full of Money by David Cameron Jaconta.
Kate Northrup:When you wrote that in your I was like,
Darnyelle Harmon:no. Oh my gosh. It changed my life. What? It changed my life.
Darnyelle Harmon:David Cameron Jakande, if you are out there, thank you. You changed my life. You changed my life because I've realized that money is spiritual Yeah. And that it is just energy. It was this tandem tangible tactical thing that I could not keep in my hands for 35 years.
Darnyelle Harmon:And I read that book and I took that class and all of a sudden, I got it. Wow. And it changed everything. And so I was already I had I made some really good investment decisions. And when I say I, I mean my financial adviser.
Darnyelle Harmon:I had gotten in Microsoft really early Love it. And that did me very well. Yeah. So my portfolio was banging. And within 3 years after filing bankruptcy, I had in liquid a $1,000,000 Wow.
Darnyelle Harmon:Because I applied the principles in the book to the practical strategy of money and money management, and I made a $1,000,000 liquid in addition to what was in my 401 k.
Kate Northrup:That's incredible. This story is so good. I wanna know though for somebody who you, you know, self described did not have financial literacy
Darnyelle Harmon:Mhmm.
Kate Northrup:How is it that you managed to, like, sock away this portfolio at the same time? Well I'm fascinated by the combination of those two things.
Darnyelle Harmon:So here's the thing. Like, I would I so I had mentors and coaches before we called them coaches and mentors. Okay. Right? And when I got to corporate America, the one of the very first things I realized to do, and this is gonna probably sound funny coming from me, a black girl, talking to you, a white girl, but the white people around me, they did things that were foreign to me.
Darnyelle Harmon:They went on vacation. They had financial advisers. I'm like, oh, I gotta get me one of those. Right? So 21, 22 years old.
Kate Northrup:You went to that.
Darnyelle Harmon:I'm starting in corporate America. I got a financial advisor. Brilliant. I was making I was not making a lot of money when I started entry level 2 17 representative in my company, like, $19,049 or $41 the 1st year. So by 3 years later, when I bought my house, I bought a house at 22.
Darnyelle Harmon:Wow. Well, not even 3 years later, like, a year later, I bought my house at 22 because a mortgage was the same as rent. Yeah. Why rent if you could have be buying a house? Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:So I bought my first house and I got a financial advisor. And I got to buy my house with a $1,000. That was all I needed. Wow. First time home buyers.
Darnyelle Harmon:That's a different type. So, yeah. So I put and they gave you 6%, they matched.
Kate Northrup:Uh-huh.
Darnyelle Harmon:So I put my 6% in to get my match. Like, I did what my financial adviser said, and then I, you know, I did the little questionnaire of my tolerance. I was young. I was in my early twenties, so I've got risk. I've got time to make it all back if it all goes away, and we got into some great stocks.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. And you had compounding interest on your side and the and the, like, time value of money. I'm just, like, I am celebrating early twenties starting out, and I really wish I had done some similar things, and I just like deep respect. That's really cool. That's really cool.
Kate Northrup:And and and just a beautiful example that, like, there is beauty in every situation and not and and all situations, there's a lot of layers going on. There's and and 2 things can be true at the same time because you were actually being super smart with money at the same time.
Darnyelle Harmon:As I was being very
Kate Northrup:reckless. Like
Darnyelle Harmon:trying to buy love. Right. Exactly. Fascinating. Interesting because I you know, because I look at all of these things because, you know, I have to help you with money.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? And I'm like, this is crazy. But again, I'm a teacher of money, so I have to have experience everything in order to be able to help other people.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. No. It's great. Okay. So you talk about obviously, your brand is and your your book title and your podcast title is move to millions.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yes.
Kate Northrup:And you you speak about that money has to move because it's an energy. Yes. And there's something that you I've heard you say now, like, many, many times, but you haven't said it here yet. Okay. So I want you to say it, which is about, like, how how to make that money move.
Kate Northrup:What are the 2 things you need to do?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. So you need to invest and be investable. Yeah. That's it. Yes.
Kate Northrup:So the invest part I get, but the investable part, I think, obviously, I get that too, but, like Yeah. That was new. So can you just share what being investable means?
Darnyelle Harmon:A people who work for other people too. And being investable means that you are marketable, that you have you solve a problem. Right? Entrepreneurs solve a problem for profit. Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:The end. That's it. Money has to move. It's always moving. It never stops moving.
Darnyelle Harmon:Now, there are times when it stops moving to you. And why would that be? Because you're not investing in being investable. Like, there are things that we do. If you go to a restaurant, I don't care if the waitress is snotty.
Darnyelle Harmon:Give her a tip because money has to move. When someone gives you a compliment, I don't care if the dress is 20 years old and you haven't been able to fit it. Just say thank you. Yeah. So that money, the energy of abundance, because that's what a compliment is.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's the energy of abundance, so that it keeps moving. Mhmm. Just
Kate Northrup:let it move. Yeah. So something I heard you speak about recently was really about integrity, but specifically around investing in programs and and not following through on your payments or on your commitment to the program. And that comes up from time to time, of course. Right.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's the cost of doing business.
Kate Northrup:Owner. Like, write offs are real. Yeah. And I just really would love to hear you speak a bit about alignment and commitment and integrity as it relates to our money because I think so many people, myself included in the past, so I just, you know, this is not separate for me, but like, will wonder, like, why is the money not showing up? And and and I think it's related to what you said with this integrity piece.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. So I'm gonna go back a little bit to answer this question. So the reason I did that episode on my podcast is because every time a client defaults on one of our programs, I want to have this conversation with them. Right. And I don't because I'm, like, they don't even realize what they're doing.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's gonna hurt them more than it's gonna hurt me.
Kate Northrup:That was the piece. Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:Okay. They don't even realize it. Right? So I just mind my business, and I was working with a couple of clients who were having the same thing happen, and I just got frustrated and it's like, you know why I'm gonna do an episode about it. And and the truth is, it's principle.
Darnyelle Harmon:I believe God is principled. And most of the things I share, I can reference the Bible when I do. So Galatians 6 and 9 says, do not be deceived. God will not be mocked. A man will reap what he sows.
Darnyelle Harmon:Okay? So how does this translate until you signed up for the coaching program? You were excited, you were gung ho, you gave your money, oh my gosh, I'm gonna change my life. And then maybe life happened to you or maybe you didn't actually take the actions you need to take to get the result. Either way, you get disgruntled and you decide to stop paying the coach, and you think you're justified.
Darnyelle Harmon:You signed an agreement though. And that agreement that you signed said it was non cancelable and likely that you had to pay for it no matter what and all the things, and you agreed to that. You put your name on the line and you said this is what I'm gonna do. And then you decide to walk away from your obligation and you expect for money to move for you. Nah.
Darnyelle Harmon:It doesn't work that way because money is an energy, and it because it's an energy, it is principled, and it is gonna operate inside of the principle of how it moves. And when we default on programs, when we stop paying, when we do anything that we shouldn't do, we stop the flow of abundance. And so that's what you're doing. Now, you might still have some success. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:And I talk I talk of in the episode about one particular client. Right? You might have some early success, and you might think, whoo, I got away with it, but it's gonna catch up to you. Yeah. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:It's going to catch up. And whatever I we we access on our applications when people wanna when people wanna come into our programs. Do you have any unpaid outstanding balance with any other coach that would prevent us from being able to help you? And in parenthesis, I say accountability and integrity. And people do honestly say yes.
Darnyelle Harmon:Sometimes I'm like, well, tell me about it. I had one person that I was like, I'd love to work with you but she and I knew the person she owed money to. I was like, you gotta go pay her before you can work with me. There's no way in the world I'm getting involved in the energy because you're gonna blame it on me and it ain't me. It's your energy because you're not energy because you're gonna blame it on me, and it ain't me.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's your energy because you're not doing what you're supposed to do, and you're not operating in integrity. And so we can't expect for money to move to us when we're not integris, because that's a principle of money. And so, yeah, I just wanna say I'm gonna turn to the camera. So if you're out there and you owe somebody money, you were in a program, If life happened to you, I get it. We have it happen to us too, and we are human beings, and we respond as human beings when clients hit a hardship.
Darnyelle Harmon:My recommendation is that you reach out to the person that you owe money and begin making payments. 25, 35, 50, a $100, whatever you can reasonably afford, start paying them back so that your money will start moving. And what will happen is that you will see the abundance start to recirculate in your life. And as a result of it, the things that you've been praying for, the goals that you've been setting, the strategies you've been mapping out will actually start to work, but they will not work. They will not work in their entirety when you have defaulted and operated outside of the principles and the flow of abundance.
Kate Northrup:Amen. It's so good. And the piece that you said, which obviously you just explained so beautifully, but I just wanna say it one more time, is that people think it's gonna hurt the coach or the consultant. It's actually going to hurt them in the long run because if we're out of alignment, if we're out of integrity financially, money doesn't feel safe with us. That's right.
Kate Northrup:And it's just such a perfect example, and I love the way you said it. Now you also spoke about doing a forgiveness process
Darnyelle Harmon:Mhmm.
Kate Northrup:In your book and then also, on the podcast. And I wanna know what does a forgiveness process look like for you, and why is forgiveness such an important piece of prosperity?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yes. So so the I'm gonna answer the second part of the question first. Great. So the reason why forgiveness is such an important part of prosperity is because in Mark 11 verse 20 to through 26, check the verses. They might not be an exact, but Jesus and the disciples are walking from Bethany to wherever they're going.
Darnyelle Harmon:And Jesus sees a fig tree, and he decides he wants a Fig Newton. Darnell's version of the Bible, not actual Bible. There were no Fig Newtons in the Bible. And so he wants a Fig Newton. Uh-huh.
Darnyelle Harmon:So he stops at the Fig Tree, but the Fig Tree is not producing. Well, I imagine he gets a little upset because he's hungry. He's hangry. And as a result, he curses the tree and tells the tree to die, but they keep walking. Jesus does.
Darnyelle Harmon:Jesus does. Okay. And they keep walking. The next day, the disciples and Jesus are walking back. The disciples see the tree all crumpled up and they cannot believe that the tree actually died.
Darnyelle Harmon:Jesus sees this as a teachable moment. So he turns around and he says, listen. And he says it in scripture speak, verily, verily, I say unto you, you can say to any mountain, move, and it will if 4 things happen. And so we're talking about any mountain. The mountain of debt, the mountain of money, the mountain of wealth, the mountain of health, the mountain of your marriage, any mountain can tell it to move if you speak, if you believe, if you don't doubt, and you forgive.
Darnyelle Harmon:So forgiveness is a principle that keeps your mountains moving, and we all want mountains of money, don't we? And we want them to move, so we must forgive. So so that's why forgiveness is so important, and it's it's one of the only commands that God makes often in the Bible, like, forgive, forgive, forgive, because it is so it's we can't hold anything in. And you know this. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:Our nervous system, 1st and foremost, the lack in our body that gets trapped there because of unforgiveness will prevent it will make disease happen Literally. And it doesn't have to
Kate Northrup:It lives in ourselves.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right. Yeah. If we would just release it. Right? And and when you understand the power of forgiveness and releasing it from your cellular memory, it reinstates the flow and the alignment.
Darnyelle Harmon:So how do I do this? So I read a book called Forgiving Forward by Bruce and Tony Hebel. Okay. Highly recommend the book. When people buy my book on Amazon, it the book that it says people most likely buy this together is Forgiving Forward.
Darnyelle Harmon:So Love it. Shout out to the Hebbles. And it really helps you to understand that forgiveness is for you. Most people, in my experience, don't forgive because they think that they're letting the other person off the hook. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:And forgiveness, if you ask me, is releasing them from the obligation of something that they did maybe when they weren't in their right mind, they weren't thinking straight, they were under control of some substance, it's releasing them from the obligation to still be held to being that person today. Right? And when you forgive, it's a personal act. Do not do not call the person and tell them that you've forgiven. Do not do it.
Darnyelle Harmon:You wanna know why? Because they're not gonna believe that you're still upset about that thing that happened 20 years ago, and they're gonna piss you off all over again, and then you're gonna have to keep running them through the protocol. So don't do that. Instead, do it yourself. So for me, what it looks like is writing, like, I do it every Sunday because I don't wanna go into any week with any forgiveness Beautiful.
Darnyelle Harmon:Or unforgiveness in my heart. So I literally write down I have a forgiveness notebook, and I literally say, who do I need to forgive and for what? And I write the names and the reason why. Now it could be my mom because of whatever. It could be a client because they defaulted.
Darnyelle Harmon:It could be a service provider because they didn't deliver. Yeah. It doesn't matter. Everybody. The man who cut me off, the girl who flipped me the bird in the supermarket line, whatever, everybody goes there.
Darnyelle Harmon:If I can remember them, I write them down. And then 1 by 1, I choose to release them of the obligation of still being held to the thing that they did to me. I released them to their best and highest good. Now does it
Kate Northrup:always work the first time?
Darnyelle Harmon:No. Right. I've literally run the protocol than going to Walmart and ran into someone
Kate Northrup:that I needed to forgive and could fill it
Darnyelle Harmon:all up in my body. Yeah. So it doesn't happen the first time. But for me, it's the act of constantly staying in the state of not holding them captive to something they did when they weren't thinking straight. Right.
Darnyelle Harmon:And it releases me from feeling like I'm somehow somehow there's something wrong with me because they chose to do this thing to me. Yeah. And then it also removes me from it and makes it less about me. So I get to isolate from the issue itself. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:Like, I don't believe that any client that defaults on our program is defaulting on Darnielle Antoinette. Right? So I get to be separate from it and because of that, I can let it go. I mean, I literally was just on Facebook the other day and made a comment on a post of somebody who owes me money. I'm not held to it.
Darnyelle Harmon:Totally. You know what I mean? You're free. I'm free. They're not my source anyway.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right. And so because I understand that, I don't have to get my panties in a bunch because they've made a decision that's gonna hurt them more than it's gonna hurt me. And in love, I can release them so that if I ever do see them out in public, it's not contentious.
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's just, hey, how are you? Right? And it it just allows me to live better. It keeps me in alignment. It keeps me obedient.
Darnyelle Harmon:It keeps me operating in what I know I'm supposed to be doing to move my life and the purpose of my life forward.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Why do you think that the $1,000,000 mark matters so
Darnyelle Harmon:much? Oh, I think because so many people haven't hit it.
Kate Northrup:What are I I I don't expect you to know these off the top of your head, but the statistics
Darnyelle Harmon:sir. How I know them? You know
Kate Northrup:the uptake rate.
Darnyelle Harmon:All the time. Great. So 4 very odd. 4.2 percent. So there's 33,000,000 small businesses in the United States.
Darnyelle Harmon:A small business is classified. It used to be 500 employees, but now they've raised it. It's 1500 employees now, which is crazy to me. But anyway, it's big, but Right. Regardless.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. But anyway, so there's 33,000,000 small businesses. Of those small businesses, approximately 90 percent of them are solopreneur, non employer entity. So that's where most of us play. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:Like, we don't have employees or don't have a lot of employees. And when we look at that 4.2% is the number of the whole 33,000,000 that actually makes 7 figures or more a year. That number gets smaller the deeper we go. So if we go to service based businesses like you and me, 2.35%. If we go to women owned service based businesses, 1.9%.
Darnyelle Harmon:If we go to black service based businesses, 0.9%. If we go to black women, 0.5%. So the statistics are abysmal. These are 100 of 1,000 in comparison to multiples of multiples of 1,000,000. And in my opinion, a 7 figure business is the floor.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's not the ceiling because it really gives you the ability to make money move. You can make people's lives different. Right? You can be benevolent. I remember being 10 years old and saying I'm gonna be a philanthropist.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? A few years ago, I had the year of $10,000 check. So every check I wrote was for $10,000 to bless someone. Then I had the year of 25,000. Then I had the year of 50,000 checks.
Darnyelle Harmon:$50,000 checks. And I just love being able to give because I have resource to give. You can't be the change if you don't have any. And the reason why I think it's important in a business
Kate Northrup:I've never heard that before. That was great.
Darnyelle Harmon:Oh, yeah. You can't be the change if you don't have any. Yeah. It's my play on the, you know, be the change you wanna see in the world. So here's the thing, like, you if you have a $1,000,000 company, you can hire people and pay them more than a living wage to support your mission and your vision and help you to expand your reach without compromising your values in the process.
Darnyelle Harmon:It allows you to leave a financial legacy. Like, most of us do not come from Rockefeller and Vanderbilt types of families where 700 years of wealth is already established and waiting for us. Right? So it gives us an opportunity to shift the trajectory of who we are generationally when we have access to more. And a $1,000,000 is not a lot.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? So I said earlier, money flows away from those who feels that there's a shortage of it. Well, if you think a $1,000,000 is a lot of money, you won't ever make it because it's not a lot. A $1,000,000 is really, like, $10 in the grand scheme of things. And until you hold that energy and allow that to flow through your body, you won't make millions.
Darnyelle Harmon:I run into a lot of people. I mean, they come to work with us because they wanna get to the $1,000,000 mark. I mean, it's what we do. Yeah. And, you know, every year, we do have clients that cross the $1,000,000 mark.
Darnyelle Harmon:We're not everyone's not crossing the $1,000,000 mark, and it's not because of the strategy, although everybody thinks it's just about the strategy. It's because they're not in alignment to it. They don't believe it's for them. Even though they consciously say they want it, subconsciously, they don't actually believe it's possible. Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:And that friction is is going to stop the flow of money, stop the flow of abundance, stop the flow of opportunities because it doesn't always show up as a check-in your mailbox. Sometimes it's being invited to the right stage with the right person in the audience who has the ability to put you on a bigger stage, to put you in front of people who can give you the money. Right? And those opportunities won't show up if you believe that any amount of money, even the biggest amount of money, is a lot of money. There's no such thing as a lot of money.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's always here. It's available all the time. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:It is so good. What do you do with those beliefs when people come into your spaces and they don't believe that that's for them? What do you where do you recommend that they start? Because I would imagine some
Darnyelle Harmon:shake them. No. I don't I don't shake them.
Kate Northrup:Somebody listening has a belief that is not supporting them in terms of their prosperity.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. So we we have to dissect the belief. Right? So if we look at the word believe, believe, there's a lie smack dab in the middle of belief. Right?
Darnyelle Harmon:What I mean is most of the things you believe are a lie. So we've gotta go find we gotta pick it apart. Right? Like, if you believe you gotta work hard for money, where did that come from? Oh, it's what my dad used to say every time I asked him for money.
Darnyelle Harmon:Well, is that really the truth? Has there ever been a time in your life where you got access to money and you didn't work hard? Well, yeah. I've had people just give me money. Oh.
Darnyelle Harmon:Interesting. How is that possible if you have to work hard for it? See, now we've just realized that there's a lie in that belief. Yeah. And because we can find the lie, we can reframe it and reshape the belief.
Darnyelle Harmon:So that's conscious what we do, but we also I spend a lot of time helping people to reset the cellular memory and really understand how that how do they take the belief and turn it into a pattern that gets removed from their body. Right? So that their nervous system is not adversely affected by this belief anymore. And it can be as simple as once you identify the belief, you create a keyword. And when that every time you feel that belief, you say your keyword.
Darnyelle Harmon:And there's, like, a whole, mantra that you say. I'll give you the quick and dirty of it. But the quick and dirty of is every time you hear me say this, I want you to take the belief that I just held, and I want you to remove it. Right? And so you give yourself, your subconscious permission every time it hears that cue to release it from your body.
Darnyelle Harmon:Love that. And over time, it will release and you'll get to the point where you could say anything. I literally do this exercise, and we'll do it at my live event in a few weeks and, at the time of this recording with everyone in the audience. I'll first have them say, I am a millionaire and figure out where it's lodged in their body. Like, where is it?
Darnyelle Harmon:I'll tell them what it means based on where it is, and then we'll do the work to reset their cellular memory to release it from their body. And they'll literally, in the moment, no longer feel the tension in their shoulder or in their stomach or in their lower back because we've reset their cellular memory. And the beautiful thing is that once you understand it, we can all do this. That's so beautiful. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:So something that came up at a trust meeting once is that you actually really do have these incredible spiritual gifts, and you are actually a healer.
Darnyelle Harmon:Mhmm.
Kate Northrup:I mean, you're a teacher. You're a writer. You're a speaker. You're an entrepreneur, obviously.
Darnyelle Harmon:I'm every woman. All of it. And you really are
Kate Northrup:a healer and and and, you know, and you have these psychic gifts and or intuitive. I don't know how you would say it. So you say I
Darnyelle Harmon:would say I would just say it. Prophetic gifts. Prophetic. Thank you.
Kate Northrup:Okay. Great. So, did you always have them, or was there a moment when they came in?
Darnyelle Harmon:That's a really
Kate Northrup:I wanna know more about that.
Darnyelle Harmon:My gut says I always had them, but I wasn't always aware that I had them. Yeah. Right? I think that I believe I'm I believe that we're born like, I again, Jeremiah 1 and 5 says, before you were formed in your mother's womb, I knew you. I approved you.
Darnyelle Harmon:I think we come here with everything that we need to do the work that's purpose for us to do on the earth. Earth. I think that our purpose and our gifts reveal themselves to us over time, because it's like in the, the Karate Kid. Right? When when the student is ready, the teacher appears.
Darnyelle Harmon:Like, you have to be ready to receive and steward the gift for the gift to be made available for you to have access to it. And so at times in our life as things happen, we come to a defining moment. We experience, you know, a cataclysmic reaction 16, which is the first time I 16, which is the first time I had a significant money trauma, I was sit I had been working since I was 13. My dad made me put half of every paycheck in the bank. When I came home from I didn't have cheerleading practice one day, so I got the mail.
Darnyelle Harmon:I opened my bank statement, and my money was gone. I thought we had been robbed except my dad took my money and said, oh, you thought you were living here for free. Whole another story. But if if I had if I knew I had these gifts at that particular point in time, I don't know that I would be able to hone and steward it like I am today. Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:But I do believe it was there. It was lying dormant. It was waiting for all these things to happen. It was waiting for that. It was waiting for the bankruptcy.
Darnyelle Harmon:It was waiting for the, you know, the credit card debt. It was waiting for all the things to now manifest to show up that for me to actually be a viable solution for people who's real that if you cut me, I will bleed to be able to help them to get to the other side. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. And you see for people what's possible. Like, you you get the I you know, again, I don't know how
Darnyelle Harmon:you would say it, but No. I can get it.
Kate Northrup:The vision for
Darnyelle Harmon:what's possible for them. You are, like, you have that prophetic gift Yeah.
Kate Northrup:For what's possible for them.
Darnyelle Harmon:Really amazing. It's blinding me, actually.
Kate Northrup:Wow. It's real I mean, it's such an incredible gift, and thank you for saying yes to it because, you know, you and I are peers, and I have learned so much from being in your presence, I mean, today, but also just, like, at the gatherings that we go to. And I have found it You're such an expander for me.
Darnyelle Harmon:Thank you.
Kate Northrup:And so even though I will just say, like, even though, you know, you specialize in helping people get to that $1,000,000,000 mark, as you said, like, it's the floor.
Darnyelle Harmon:It's the floor. It's millions. Right. Exactly. We gotta do that first million first.
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. But it's millions is to have more.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Yeah. And if anybody listening has resistance and is thinking, like, either that's not for me or that's greedy or why does anybody need 1,000,000 or whatever. I mean, I think you have said it all already. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:But, like, just in case there's some of that dust still clog in the pipes Yeah. Like, what's a what's a message? What's a final message that you would wanna share with them?
Darnyelle Harmon:If you could have access to more so that you could do more good in the world, why wouldn't you want it? If you own if you're a person who says, I just need enough, that means you're only helping yourself, and that's selfish. How dare you be selfish? It's like like, I think I say this often, not being confident is like telling God he didn't need to create you. How dare you not be content?
Darnyelle Harmon:God created you out of everything. He chose you and gave you a massive perfectness to share with the world. How dare you be selfish? So I would just challenge you to to think if that's really the truth or if that is a story that you're telling yourself because that's what holds us back, those stories that we tell ourselves. And find the origin of the story because 9 times out of 10 of any person who says that was they were told in their formative years that they weren't worthy, either exactly in the words or through other words that translated as that for them.
Darnyelle Harmon:Right? Like, I think I think my mom I think both my parents did the best that they could with what they have. And my mom used to tell us all the time, we're gonna be just like our no good father all the time. All the time. If I had to believe that Yeah.
Darnyelle Harmon:You know, who would I be today? Right? But I didn't believe it. I'd no. I was like, there's no way in the world I'm gonna be like him.
Darnyelle Harmon:But anyway, because he you know, my dad had pluses and minuses just like everyone else.
Kate Northrup:Of course.
Darnyelle Harmon:And I'm so grateful that when my mom went to jail, he took custody of us. And, you know, in in my my day my dad's last 33 days, we had an amazing time of not that we had ever been completely on the outs, but we had an amazing time of reconciliation. It got to be said. And it was just amazing, which is why I dedicated my book to him. He's actually the reason that I went hard in getting the book done once he passed.
Darnyelle Harmon:Because as I told him about the idea, he was like, you've gotta get that book out in the world. And I know he was really proud of me, and I know he was really grateful that all of the demons that haunted him through money and substance abuse and all of those things, that I've become a victor over those things, and I'm helping other people to be able to do the same thing.
Kate Northrup:So great. Thank you so much for me, Erin. This was really beautiful. If people wanna connect more with you, where should they go? Where should they come find you?
Darnyelle Harmon:Yeah. Move to millions.com, the book, the podcast, all
Kate Northrup:the things are at move to millions.com. Amazing. And, you know, I was just say I highly recommend the podcast. If you if you have enjoyed listening to Darnielle today, go listen, and the book is written just like it. So just all the things tap in.
Kate Northrup:Thank you for being here.
Darnyelle Harmon:Thank you for having me.
Kate Northrup:I'm so excited to be teaching a workshop for the first time at the Omega Institute in beautiful Rhinebeck, New York, October 18th through 20th called More Than Enough. During the weekend workshop, we are going to dig into healing and accessing more abundance for time, energy, and money from an energetic, emotional nervous system, and practical standpoint. There will be somatic practices, there will be journaling, there will be lecture, there will be dancing, and at the end of the workshop, you will have tapped into your access point for an experience of plenty in your life, specifically when it comes to time and money. If you wanna know more to come join me for that workshop, head over to kate northrup.comforward/omega.
Darnyelle Harmon:I'll see you there.