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We need a new definition of success—one that harmonizes meaning and money.
Imagine diving into your workday with renewed energy, leaving behind the exhaustion or dread of a monotonous grind.
Traditional beliefs about success and the root cause of burnout are the same:
Prove yourself.
Work harder.
Take care of the business, and it will take care of you.
We’re recycling the mindset and practices that keep us stuck. Our souls need a jumpstart into The Age of Humanity.
Tune in for a new way of working that honors our nervous system and the bottom line, using knowledge of the brain, the Bible, and business. We’ll discuss timeless truths that amplify growth, ignite change, and reshape the world of work. No corporate speak or business BS. Let’s get to the heart of a rewarding career and profitable growth.
We speak human about business.
What’s in it for You?
Value, Relevance, and Impact (VRI): No, it's not a new tech gadget—it's your ticket to making your work genuinely matter to you and your company.
Human-Centric Insights: We prioritize people over profits without sacrificing the bottom line. Think less "cog in the machine" and more "humans helping humans."
I'm your host, Rebecca Fleetwood Hesson, your thrive guide leading you into the new Age of Humanity. I’ve navigated the highs and lows of business and life, from achieving over $40 million in sales, teaching thousands of people around the world about leadership, trust, execution, and productivity to facing burnout, divorce, raising a couple of great humans (one with ADHD), and navigating the uncertainty of starting a business.
I’m committed to igniting change in the world by jumpstarting business into profitable growth with the timeless truths of our humanity.
Sound crazy? It’s only crazy until it works.
Hit subscribe to never miss an episode, and leave a review to help other listeners discover our show.
Want insight and advice on your real career and business challenges? Connect with me on social media or email me at rebecca@wethrive.live. Your story could spark our next conversation.
[00:00:10] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Welcome back to the Business Is Human Podcast. I’m your host, Rebecca Fleetwood Hession, and we’re here to bring you episodes that blend meaningful work with profitable success. Here to steward what I call the Age of Humanity. I believe if we transform the way we work, we can transform the way that we live. As always, my friendly request, if you like what you hear, hit subscribe so you don’t miss any episode and leave a review to tell the other humans that they might like it too. Always looking to help you and connect with others. All right, let’s get into it, shall we? Ladies and gentlemen, it’s that time of the year again. The seventh annual Stand Tall in Your Story event is March 12th at the Indiana of Ballroom.
[00:00:50] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: It’s an evening event, and you can check out all the information at rebeccafleetwoodhession.com and go to the Stand Tall tab in a world that is increasingly more artificial. This event continues to grow and expand because it’s so, so human. This year, eight leaders from the Indianapolis community will take the stage for their headaches-like talk about their real life. And this event has grown 600% in the last seven years. Year one, I was just hoping somebody’d show up. And now here we are setting tables and believing that 500 people are going to be there. So get you, take it. Get it now before they’re sold out. Hey, hey, hey, how’s it going? Hey, I’ve got five things for you today to make your business, your team, more human, more connected, more love. How’s that sound? I love helping people see the difference between … Well, I always say all of our thoughts come from love or fear and it probably is starting to sound trite and I don’t want it to because what I love is when people start to truly understand the difference because what we’re talking about when we’re talking about love and fear is fear is being in a protective state.
[00:02:13] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: I got to be vigilant, which we talked about on last week’s show. I’m constantly scanning because your nervous system has one job. It’s scanning to make sure am I safe. And so when we know the difference between living in a protective state versus a connected or loving state, you start to see everything differently. You start to see your life and your job and everything differently. And so I want to give you that lens to see the world through so that you can start to find your own ways to make sure that you and your team can be more connected and more human, but I’m going to give you some for today. So just some context. Protection’s not bad. It’s necessary. Sometimes your nervous system senses, “I’m not feeling super safe here.” And that’s what it’s supposed to do. It means it’s working like it’s supposed to, but we can create teams and organizations that are more friendly to love and connection, where people don’t feel like they need to be constantly vigilant or protective.
[00:03:25] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Because creating organizations that are more human is not soft. It doesn’t mean that we’re not going after goals and we’re not doing important work, but we’re doing it in a way that humans have better access to their best thinking, their best creativity, their greatest innovation, great leadership. This takes some big intention. So the protective state is when your brain, your nervous system is prioritizing, it feels more like it’s surviving. And so it has to narrow attention. It has to just kind of take things from a wide angle lens into a super tight micro focus. It’s like, whew, focus in. And we want to create the kind of environments where people feel wide angle lens. What’s happening, what’s working, what’s good? And the energy that flows from that prioritizes relationships and meaning and people feel better about their work. Time expands. You become more curious about things, whether it’s your customers or solving problems, you’re more grounded, you’re more discerning.
[00:04:44] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Energy is more focused on learning and collaboration and working well together. So the business impact of creating an environment that’s far more human and far more connecting and loving has a huge return on investment, a huge upside. So I wanted to give that clarification because sometimes I just throw the love and all of our thoughts come from love and fear and people are like, “Love. My job’s hard. I don’t love it. “ I just wanted to clarify what we mean by being in a connected state. So how can we create more human teams and businesses? Glad you asked. Okay. The first one is, as a leader, or let’s say you’re not the leader from an org chart perspective. I’m going to say you’re the leader because you care about this and this is for you.
[00:05:45] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: It’s up to us to regulate ourselves first. So even if you’re not the boss, but you care about business, you care about your team, you’re listening to this show because you care about the world, then our responsibility is to be regulated in our nervous system. So we bring connection, energy into the room. You don’t have to be the boss to do this, but if you are the boss, you have to do this. You have to, I’m begging you. Because when you walk into a room from a regulated, open, nervous system state, it’s contagious. And the minute that others feel your openness, loving, connection, regulated state, they say, “Oh, it’s safe here. Isn’t that lovely?” And so what that looks like is your pace is a bit slower, your tone is even keel. You are not as reactive to people’s questions like you need to hurry up and prove yourself and respond.
[00:07:00] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: You can be more reflective in your responses. You then give other people’s nervous system the permission to do the same. So when someone asks a question, you can pause before you respond. You can just say, “Huh, that’s a good question. Let me think about that for a minute.” And actually access your prefrontal cortex for a minute. Just take a beat. We don’t always have to escalate urgency. We can be far more discerning about what’s actually urgent and what we are unnecessarily making urgent because it’s the name of the game and business. Another way to show your regulation in an environment, a team environment, is to speak clearly, but not snippy, sharp, pay attention to your tone so that you’re talking like a human talks to another human, not like you’re giving a set of instructions. People don’t feel safe because of the thing that you say.
[00:08:13] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: It’s the way that they hear it. They feel safe because your nervous system isn’t triggering or alarming theirs. So the way that you deliver information from a regulated state is different than when you come in blazing from the meeting before that you ran over and now you’re late and you come flying in, paper’s flying. I’m sorry, I’m late. Oh my gosh. Immediately that changes the tone in the room. So enter with a regulated state is number one. Number two, and I kind of touched on this a little bit already, create clarity instead of pressure. There’s this dumb thing in business that if we create pressure and urgency, people will work harder. Yeah, for a minute. And then when you leave, they’re not going to. That urgency that you think you’re creating creates a nervous system response that is a vigilant, “Oh my gosh, I don’t want to get in trouble.” But what you’ve also done when you create pressure is you’ve shut off the other person’s ability to access their best thinking and creativity.
[00:09:33] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: So the product that you’re going to get back from pressure is less than lovely. It’s not as smart. It’s not as good. It’s probably going to need to be reworked. It’s going to ultimately take you longer to get to great quality with pressure than it will be through clarity. Because when you create clarity without the pressure, then people are clear and they love clarity. When we give pressure and lack of clarity, oh my gosh, that’s like business disaster 101. But when you give clarity, then their nervous system calms because they don’t have to guess. “Oh, good. I know what they want. “Yay. They know what matters, what success looks like, and what is required right now and what’s not required right now. That’s a big one because clarity on what is important right now, sure. But sometimes you also have to say,” And that means we’re not going to focus on this like we were, “because otherwise people just pile on.
[00:10:48] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: So the more clear you can be about what is important right now and what isn’t required or important right now, that’s the snizzle. That’s good stuff. And just talk plain. Here’s what actually has to happen today or this week or this month. Another one, this is important, but it’s not an emergency. I want your best thinking on it. Take some time to reflect. Getting me an answer tomorrow isn’t better than you taking some time to think about it and getting an answer next week or getting the deliverable by a certain date. This is important, but it’s not an emergency because another tragedy in business is everybody treats everything like an emergency, whether it’s been articulated that way or not because the thought is faster’s better, faster’s better. And so if a leader says,” Hey, could you get this to me? “People immediately think, “ I better stay up all night and do it.
[00:11:42] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: “So be really clear. Be clear on here’s the decisions that we need to make and here’s the ones that can be open for a while. We can ponder for a while. We can reflect on for a while, which means you’re going to want to do that reflection for yourself so that when you walk into the meeting, you know these things and you can articulate them. And guess what that does to your nervous system? Helps you be more regulated. See how this works? Everybody wins. Number three, slow the moment down, which isn’t slowing down the mission or the goal or the expectations. If there’s a goal and a deadline, great. But in the conversation about the goal and the deadline, you can slow that moment down in the way that you talk about it and the way that you actually are having an actual conversation, not just talking at people.
[00:12:42] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: When things are more urgent, there’s a tighter deadline on things. It tends to speed up everything about the project or the conversation, and that’s not helpful. And so in the interaction, the meeting about the project, the conversation about the project, little micro behaviors, let people finish their sentences. Sometimes we get so worked up and excited that somebody starts to say something and we finish their sentence, we jump in. Well, that’s just fueling the nervous system dysregulation and the protective state of this project is already urgent and now I’m feeling really closed off, shut down. So just be really aware of those little micro things. Pause and ask curious questions. Don’t just spin off to the next thing. It creates this innitizy feeling for the meeting. Again, allow pauses before you problem solve, before you respond, literally model saying, That’s a great question. Let me just think about that for a minute and then just pause and really give yourself a minute to think about it.
[00:13:59] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: It’s amazing what that’ll do for you and the team. A regulated moment conversation. It could be a conversation you’re having with somebody. It could be a meeting that you’re having with a group of people, but a regulated moment even for urgent issues will net you far greater results, I promise. Number four, acknowledge effort before outcome. Protection and fear gets really stirred up. It thrives in environments where people feel like they’re measured, but not seen. Another way that I talk about this a lot is make sure that you give affirmation of who somebody is, not just what they’ve accomplished or what they’ve delivered. So an easy example is if you’re talking to a salesperson, don’t just comment on their quota, comment on their effort and who they are. “Hey, I noticed that your relationships with customers are so good. It’s no wonder you’re at 105% a goal all the time.
[00:15:13] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: I see you. That’s the comment you want to make. The I see you comment because connection grows when leaders see people not just comment on their outcomes. And that means you have to actually see them, know them as people. So there’s the other nervous system regulation connector point. When you are the kind of leader that sees people or who they are and the effort that they put in, and then acknowledge that with your comments. Now you’ve created the kind of environment that opens conversations up, opens it up to feel safe, loved, all good. This isn’t like fake praise, blowing smoke up somebody’s skirt. I’m talking about … Where did that phrase come from, by the way? There’s one I need to look up before I keep saying it. It’s probably really awful. I’ll take that as an assignment for myself. I’m not talking about just praising people.
[00:16:13] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Ew. And I promise you, high performers know if you do that, that’s icky. That’s not at all going to create a sense of love and connection. That’s going to create far more fear and protection if you’re icky about it. So when you’re giving praise, make sure it’s about who they are and it’s thoughtful. It’s not icky. Number five, normalize real humanity, not perfection. We are not machines here to produce, y’all. And so mistakes are going to happen. Things are never going to be perfect. And it’s important that we acknowledge those things for ourselves, not just our teams. When you as a leader model, I’m not really sure how this is going to turn out. Uncertainty. And you just name it. Or,” Hey, I messed this up. I thought this was the right answer and it wasn’t. “And it’s not shame, no blame. Just being a real human will do amazing things for creating nervous system regulation amongst your team.
[00:17:26] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Now you don’t have to go on and on about it. Just,” Hey, what’s the next best decision? Because this one wasn’t it. I made a mistake. Now let’s move forward and do something different next. “And again, I’ve said this will be the third time I’ve said it, so hopefully you’re getting it. Take a minute to just think and saying,” Hey, you know what? I need a minute to think about that. “Or,” I need to get back with you next week. I really want to ponder that this weekend or this week. “That’s a beautiful thing. It’s to take the time to be thoughtful and reflective and model that and not thinking that you’re supposed to have all the answers all the time and then just spewing something out because you think you’re supposed to have an answer and then it wasn’t a great answer. So safety doesn’t get built by flawless leaders or ones that always have the answer.
[00:18:21] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: It’s built with honest ones who are navigating the human experience just like they are. So there’s your five thanks. I truly hope that they were helpful. And if you start to use them and get some results, let me know. Let me know what else you’d like to hear about, topics that you’re struggling with. Let’s bring them on the show. All right, y’all. Love you mean it.
[00:18:57] Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Thanks for being here. You can follow us on Instagram, Business Is Human or TikTok, Rebecca Fleetwood Hession. It’s a great way to share some of the clips with your colleagues and friends. All right. Make it a great day. Love you mean it.