Build Your Brave Career with Nicole Trick Steinbach

"I wanted to cultivate some happiness in my life because my mind was so stuck in perfectionism and performance, and I didn't do well enough. So I was like, I need some optimism and positivity. So the question is, where did I smile today?" - Melissa Rauen

This week we dive into perfectionism and performance anxiety with guest Melissa Rauen. In one year Melissa changed almost every aspect of her life: she got married, bought a house, shifted her career, and transformed her approach to work and life. 

Melissa shares how she began separating her identity from performance in a way that has been pivotal in both her career and her life. Listen in for how she built simple, regular practices to foster gratitude, lower her stress, reduce her workload, and strengthen her mindset.

Then we discuss the growing and demanding opportunities within the multifaceted Governance, Risk, and Compliance (GRC) career tracks. 

Hot topics from this episode:
  • Exploring the journey of overcoming perfectionism and performance anxiety.
  • Separating identity from performance and daily practices for shift 
  • Career opportunities within GRC, compliance, governance, and risk management
Connect with Melissa Rauen on LinkedIn

Related Episodes: 
E51: Marcae Bryant Omosor: Clarity, Purpose and Let the World Catch Up with You; CyberSecurity, Data Protection
E64: Clarity - Self-Concept Design


For more information on how you can build your brave career, reach out to me
Check out my website
Join my mailing list for more insights, opportunities, and inspiration
Connection with me on LinkedIn


If you are an established woman in tech who is creating results and making an impact at work so your workload and stress just keep growing but promotions and salary bumps remain a distant dream, it is time for change. 

Listen, we all know the tech industry has dramatically changed. It's time your career approach did too. 

You don't need cookie-cutter programs or dusty advice from outdated playbooks, because what works for tech bros, won't work for you. You need individualized, bespoke support to build your brave career. One that reflects who you are as a woman in tech. 

I invite you to explore career coaching with me. Get all the details, including prices and client results, at TrickSteinbach.com.

You can stress less, work less, and earn more. You've already earned it. Let's make it happen. 

What is Build Your Brave Career with Nicole Trick Steinbach?

Women in tech are just stressed out, overworked, overlooked, and underpaid, right? Nope. Not around here. Around here we build the skill of bravery to stress less, work less, and then earn more.

At this point in your career, you're more educated, skilled, and experienced than most of your colleagues, but you are also more stressed, working more, and are pretty sure you’re underpaid. And you are done accepting the status quo. You are ready to get what you’ve already earned and then grow your career even further…without burning out. You don’t know how you’re going to do it (yet!) but you suspect the process will require you to be braver.

Enter the Build Your Brave Career podcast.

Build Your Brave Career is the podcast to help you build the skill of bravery, one episode at a time, so you make the bold moves and big leaps required to craft a career of more impact and income... with less stress and overwork.

Tune in each week for a mix of guest conversations and solo episodes to learn how to build the skill of bravery. We explore the skill of bravery and the role it plays in your career and life including, stressing less, taking decisive action, working less, career growth, relationship building for career success, crafting purpose and fulfillment, salary increases and negotiations, overcoming obstacles, and sharing concrete tips and tricks for career satisfaction.

Your host, Nicole Trick Steinbach is the international bravery coach... but bravery is not something that has ever come naturally to her. Instead, she learned through success and failure how to develop and harness the skill of bravery to create an empowering, lucrative, and global career.

And it worked: Nicole is a former executive in the technology industry without a background in tech, has worked in over 25 countries while running transformational change projects, and is now at home in both the US and Germany.

Today Nicole is a certified and proven one-on-one coach who supports women around the world to build their brave careers, focusing on bespoke approaches for each client to stress, work less, and earn more.

To learn more about how you can build your brave, connect here:
• Website: https://tricksteinbach.com/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicoletricksteinbach

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Welcome to the Build Your Brave Career podcast, where we flip the script on the tired stereotype that women in and around the tech industry have to be stressed out, overworked, and underpaid. I'm Nicole Tricksteinbach, the International Bravery Coach and your host. Forget what you've been taught. Bravery is not Which is great because building the skill of bravery is the most powerful way to creating the career and life you really want. As you build your brave, you will stress less, work less, and then earn more. This

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

podcast will help you do just that. Let's dive in.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Are you ready to talk about the importance of being rather than doing in your career, great. Because our guest this week is Melissa Rowan. She is a passionate professional with a background in technology who focuses on driving impactful projects.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

She has former experience as a director of technology and is now a compliance analyst. Yes. I was surprised too. You're really gonna enjoy this conversation. She has honed her skills in project management and process improvement to ensure adherence to timelines, requirements, and budgets.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Melissa believes in letting go of societal expectations and following a path of strength, joy, and authenticity. I wanted Melissa to guest here on the build your brave career because she is so early in her career and yet has already identified the importance of being rather than exclusively doing. So feeling good rather than looking good to create long term and enjoyable success. As soon as we met each other online, her clarity about who she wants to be rather than what she wants to be really stood out to me. You'll hear me get more understanding of just how seriously and thoroughly she implements who over what to dramatically change her life in just a few years.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

As you listen to our conversation, please use our different stories about moments of clarity and breakthrough to identify beliefs you currently carry that need a revolution as well as situations you are ready to grow beyond. Let's dive into the conversation. Melissa, I am stoked that you're here. Welcome.

Melissa Rauen:

Thank you so much, Nicole. I am also so excited to be here and to hang out with you.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Awesome. So, Melissa, what is the piece of career advice you wanted to share today?

Melissa Rauen:

Gosh. Well, as I was thinking about this, I've really hummed it into sharing some background and stories about mindset shifts and identity changes and building my brave life that has happened in the last 3 or so years. Nothing happened overnight, but it's been a complete transformation, and I'm excited to dive into it.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Okay. So I wish that this was a video medium. It is not. It's not going to be. But I have curiosity all over my face.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Like, what? I wanna know it what it is. So if I'm gonna cherry pick a piece out of that just to kick start us for for everyone to listen to is not overnight, complete transformation, at least 3 years. Okay. Take us through it.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Let's go. This is the brave story.

Melissa Rauen:

Let's do it. Yes. So it culminated in this 12 month span from about fall of 2022 through the fall of 2023. And in that 12 month span, I got engaged to my amazing husband. We bought a house, moved out of the place we've been renting.

Melissa Rauen:

We got a puppy. We planned a wedding. We got married, and then I accepted a new job. So at the end of that 12 month, I looked back and I was like, my life looks nothing how it looked like 12 months ago, which was wild and complete transformation.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Okay. Let's baseline this. We love data. Right? Let's baseline it.

Melissa Rauen:

So you were dating.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Were you living together? Yes. K. You were renting? Yes.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

You had no pet?

Melissa Rauen:

Correct.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And what was your job?

Melissa Rauen:

And I was director of technology.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Director of technology. Okay. And where were you living when you were renting?

Melissa Rauen:

And we live in Summit County. So for people not familiar, it's in the mountains of Colorado, and we stayed in the same vicinity.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Okay. So especially for my global audience. K? If you go on to Google and you put in mountains, Colorado, the chance that a picture from Summit County will come up is, like, 99.9%. It is gorgeous.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Skiing, beautiful homes, outdoor, mountain biking, the whole 9 yards. Okay. So that's the baseline. Then after the holistic 3 years, but especially those 12 months. So you're married, you have a dog, you've purchased a house, and what is your job?

Melissa Rauen:

And so my new job that I accepted is now a compliance analyst.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Oh, walk me through that. What?

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. And so to tag on, because I did say this was a a 3 year thing, and I hate to be an old drum, but I do think 2020 enlightened people. As we learned how fast our daily lives changed, we realized how important our time and our energy is. And during COVID, we were stressed and just mentally taxed and always adapting, never knowing what the next day would bring, and that's when I was building my career. I'd started in Helpdesk, I moved to IT manager.

Melissa Rauen:

Then during COVID is when kind of I don't know how people classify the years of COVID anymore. But towards the end of it and right before that transfer the fall of 2022 is when I was promoted to director of technology.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Okay. So in 2020, so globally, there are no norms because this is so new historically. Right? Like, 2020, the lockdowns. 2021, the extended lockdowns with the United States decided was just not a thing.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

2022, beginning of re normalization, because nobody thinks about the people with stutters when they name things. Yeah. And then 2023, okay, was where it became oh, not a pandemic, but a epic epidemic? Is that what it's called? When it's

Melissa Rauen:

I think so.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

It's like concrete or something. New technologists talking about this is kind of funny.

Melissa Rauen:

Help. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, what do

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

I have to tell? Okay. So in at 2021, so the extended lockdown period, which the US skipped, is when you were promoted into director.

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. Oh,

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

wow. In

Melissa Rauen:

that time frame.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

That's a lot.

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. And so I felt really lucky to get a promotion during COVID, And then just as you move as I was moving up in the ranks, the job was obviously changing, started doing it was a small team, but people management, bigger strategy to focus on much larger responsibility in running the technology department and running the technology for the company. And I don't think in this, you know, span of a few years, I don't think I'm alone in feeling the shifts and pulls in transition, whether someone's going through a transition or they feel a pull that something's even about to happen for them, or they just went through a transition, they might be looking back thinking, oh my gosh, my life has totally changed in the last few years.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yeah. For sure. For sure. So when you were what what size company was it when you were director of technology?

Melissa Rauen:

It was just over a 100 employees. It's local here in Summit.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Okay. Awesome. And what did you like, what pulled you towards a career shift? Because going from director of technology to compliance analyst is not a small shift. No.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

What pulled you over there?

Melissa Rauen:

Oh my goodness. It this is where nothing happened overnight. And I going you know, leading into this and probably growing up even, I was achieving a lot. Like, I'm sure most people who listen to this show, high achievers. Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

Maybe type a. And from the outside, it looks terrific. You have you have the job. You have everything on the outside, and and that's like, high achievers can just go, go, go even when they're feeling depleted and even when we're feeling empty. But I wasn't enjoying the life.

Melissa Rauen:

It was stressful. It was I was caught up in perfection. I Mhmm. I was building this successful, so to say, life that I thought I wanted. And all my hard work, I wasn't even enjoying it.

Melissa Rauen:

And so I started working

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

with it. Okay. I have to stop you there, Melissa, because I was just interviewed on a podcast called Quietly Visible for Introverted Leaders, which is hilarious because I am an extrovert and I'm a people person. So it's all about the mistakes that one makes. And one of the things I shared on there is that I was in burnout for sure and did not realize I was in burnout until, like, 3 years later.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

I had, like, gone on sick leave. I got, like, all of these weird infections, medical leave, the whole nine yards. But it was only 3 years later when I was learning about being because I, as a manager, had put one of my people into burnout on accident, one of my best people. And so as we were processing through that, I'm reading this checklist, and I'm like, all of those all of those symptoms, I would want. So let's get specific right there.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

What now looking back, what were the symptoms that you were not enjoying it?

Melissa Rauen:

I am so glad you brought this because I also I mean, this was still the first company I worked for post grad. Like, you know, I said how I kind of grew up and got promoted. And so this is still the first company post college for me. And I'd never done a career transition before. And so I just kept going and doing the things that I thought I should be doing.

Melissa Rauen:

And probably the most prominent example I can give you know, I'm the director of tech, so I'm running all the hardware and software and strategy and everything for the company. And I'm walking around, and part of it is obviously help desk for our internal employees. And when I walk by and I see the printer isn't working properly, and I just don't have capacity and, like, mentally energy to be like, oh, I'd let me fix that. Like, I'm here to solve the printer issue. Let me fix it.

Melissa Rauen:

So I see the printer's broken, and it's just, like, crushing. Like and that is a small a small thing. They're like, oh, let me fix the printer, check it out, see what needs to happen. But it's those little things that we're starting to feel huge. And and mentally, that's probably the mental being mentally crushed is what I felt in burnout.

Melissa Rauen:

Was experiencing little things. I was like, I I see that that needs to be fixed, and I I cannot fix it.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

So, like, did your did your body go hot or cold? Did you, like, freeze? Did you, like, just completely ignore it? Did you yell? Did you cry?

Melissa Rauen:

I think I think that is I just didn't do anything. I just you know, you almost you're so we're so trained when we're in that when we're in the high achieving and we're going after exactly what we think and have been told to go after

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

It's such a autopilot moment to be like, okay. I mean, sure. I I probably put it on my list because that's

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

Type a and the high achiever be like, yeah. It has to be done. But to just feel crushed by the little things.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yes. It's like And it's heavy. The freeze plus the flea. Right? Because we have Yeah.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

I'm gonna watch my language, because last time, accidentally did the whole thing. So it's, you know, fight, flight, freeze

Melissa Rauen:

Mhmm.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Fawn, and fornicate. Not the other word that I used last time to my listeners with little ones. Yeah. That's really interesting because that's where habits that's the power of the habit. Right?

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

You had the habit of okay. That goes on to the to do list. So that habit kinda kept going, but the emotional weight was, like, oh, no. I can't. So my moment was when there was this very high level publication, and the I was running communications for an executive.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And the executive had handed over some pictures, and we had signed up on the content, and then something went off with the layout. I'm not to this day, I still don't understand what happened. So the layout came out, and the executive looked horrid. I mean, horrid. Okay?

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

I'm not gonna go into all the details because it was horrid. And so at my response, I pushed back my chair, walked to the bathroom, started sobbing as soon as the door shut, and made myself so upset that I puked, washed out my mouth, went back to my desk, and started making phone calls. It was the looking like, looking back on that moment, it's the power of habit, but also the sheer overwhelm, exhaust and just doneness that there was a complete disconnect between what you're talking about here, which is like, hey, 2020 helped me find my values and that time matters and all the other things. Right? And my day to day reality where I'm just like a robot, habitually achieving and to do list and and all the nonsense.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Wow. Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

It's so it's like that little moment that makes one realize this. Like yeah. And luckily, I don't know if this is how you felt in that time, but luckily, it it got to a point where I felt like the company deserved someone who who cared and who had that mental capacity to care about the printers and care about all these things. And it's funny because at at one point, I really I did, and I wanted to be there, but it was just who knows? Maybe it was it was in the middle of that 20 22 to 2023 transformation.

Melissa Rauen:

So, obviously, we had the the puppy at home and the wedding planning going on and new homeowner stuff. But I I was thinking I was like, I think it this was part of when the identity shift then started to happen because I was like, I think they need someone who who cares and has capacity and knowledge to do even the bigger things aside from the printers and stuff like that. The printers are just my smallest example, but it is true in the small things that if the small things are heavy, that's my my internal red flag to be like, alright. I think you need to step back, recharge Yeah. Get some resources to be able to to take care of those now.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Wow. So I had interrupted you when you were about to say what you did after the printer. And I was like, woah. Stop. We need to be tied to the symptoms.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

So, like, what did you do?

Melissa Rauen:

Okay. Well, it wasn't right then with the printer, but after, you know, 2021, so in that kind of getting promotion and and starting to make decisions about what my life what I wanted my life to look like, I found a therapist, and she changed my life. I love her. And she this is just it's been life changing, and I will scream this from the rooftops. And what we practiced was the practice of being rather than doing.

Melissa Rauen:

Oh. So she challenged me to step out of doer and into being. And, of course, when she first told me this, I'm like, what are you talking about? How how do I do that? What does that even feel like?

Melissa Rauen:

Because when you tell a high achiever, type a, anybody could probably relate to say, you know, you need to stop doing things. That is a piece of our identity when you've always been producing and putting things out in the world. It's like taking off an arm or a leg, or it's taking a piece of us when you say you need to stop doing. So this was also months of in months of practice, and I am still on this journey of of stepping out of doer and into being.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Oh, me too. Oh, me too. Absolutely. And I think most of the people listening as well. It's it's so intriguing because your experience is the most common of experiences for women in male dominated industries, Reach the level with performance, and then performance is what either slows it down, ends it, or burns you out.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And so the be and the do, the do and the be, the level in career success fundamentally shifts. At the beginning, it's perform, do. Right? Perform, perform, perform. And, of course, we never stop performing, but the b, the perception, becomes ever more important as we move up.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

So as you were telling me the story, Melissa, of, like, oh, why didn't I just start doing the printer? Everything inside of me as a coach, but also as a former leader, former executive was, like, oh, she's gonna tell me a burnout story. Right? Because at a director level, that's not your job. Right?

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

But when we're in the do, do, do, perform, perform, perform, and not the b, the perception, the perceiving of oh, this is so common. So common.

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. And I love hearing I am just I'm thankful that the conversations are happening right now. I'm thankful for the space that you hold for people to have these conversations with each other about this because I think the best way to learn is through each other.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And stories. That is actually why I started this podcast, and I've shared this many times. But the number one most common emotional word for women in tech, which I'm gonna presume are women in STEM, right, is lonely.

Melissa Rauen:

Interesting. And

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

I know that I thought I was the only one in the bathroom crying, only to learn so many women. I thought I was the only one being sexually harassed. Nope. So many women. That was the only one who discovered I was sick.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Nope. So many women. That's why I started this podcast. And now knowing that as you were telling the story, I know there are at least 2 people who are gonna listen to this episode whenever they listen to it and go,

Melissa Rauen:

uh-oh. That's me. That's me. Yeah.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And, hopefully, they're gonna turn to this doing and being perform perception.

Melissa Rauen:

Yeah.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And also reach out and get the support that they need. Therapy is fantastic. Yes. Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

What else helped you? So that was really and then it was practicing that. And I think the the bravery comes from letting go of the doing, letting go separating your identity from the performance. And that right there is I'm like, how? How do we do that?

Melissa Rauen:

How do we separate identity from our performance? And so just digging into that and that the practices that I've found through there have is what's changed my life. And I think it's put it on a whole new trajectory.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Wow. So I have a podcast episode called The Self-concept. I'll link it in the show notes. But can you share one concrete practice that maybe people listening could take up on?

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. I have a few practices that I love and a few questions. So I will first share my practice, and people can you can take it or leave it. I think I've told every one of my friends about this. I am a journal maker.

Melissa Rauen:

Yeah. I love to journal, and I never had a good a good routine. You know, it was a it was a great place for me to just dump out when I got to my tipping point and my bucket was filled and I was needing to release, you know, I'd go to the journal. But it was in April, in the middle of my transition year. It was in April and I said, I'm gonna I just wanna start journaling a little tiny bit every day.

Melissa Rauen:

And I didn't wanna use the cliche, what are you grateful for Because that never worked for me. But I wanted to cultivate some happiness in my life because my mind was so stuck in, you know, the perfectionism and the performance, and I didn't do well enough. So, like, I need some optimism and positivity. So the questions and is, where did I smile today? And I can kind of do variations on that of, like, what when did I feel happy?

Melissa Rauen:

But the most concrete is when did I smile today? And I write one sentence about that, and it's usually something about walking the dog, or I enjoyed getting outside. And then my next question is, what am I what am I excited about tomorrow? And, again, it's I 90% of it well, this is interesting. 90% of the time, what I'm excited for the next day is my coffee and my workout.

Melissa Rauen:

And that's okay. That is that that's what I write every day because I am genuinely I love those little daily routines that I have. And so that's one of my journaling practices every single night. I do it on vacation. I do it when I'm traveling and everything, and it now is something that I look for in the day.

Melissa Rauen:

You know? Now I've been doing it for gosh. It'll it'll be a year in a few months. And then I look for, oh my gosh, I'm on the walk with my dog and it's so beautiful because it's snowing right now, and the snowplows are out working, and this is just so fun to live here. And I noticed that now in a moment.

Melissa Rauen:

It wasn't right away, but that's one practice that I have.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

What I love about these questions is they are within your circle of control. Yes. Where did I smile today? Mhmm. What am I excited about tomorrow?

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Mhmm. Yeah. Beautiful. Oh, that's so generous.

Melissa Rauen:

Yeah. And I I think it like, cause when you're asking yourself, when did I smile today? There's some scientific evidence behind it, which I don't know, so I won't even try to speak to it. But it drops you into the moment. So when you're going to bed, and you might I'm like, typically, I had a racing mind.

Melissa Rauen:

I think about the conversations that didn't go right or the things that just didn't get done today, things that were coming tomorrow. And when I could step out of that monkey mind and ask myself, when did I smile? And then I'd pull up, you know, oh, I smiled when my husband made me a cappuccino. It put me back in that moment, and then I go to bed just feeling much more relaxed and grateful for my life. Even if that was the only time I smiled during the whole day hearing something, you know, it it dropped me into that moment.

Melissa Rauen:

And that's what I think is so powerful about it.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Absolutely. Yeah. The specificity leads to the vulnerability which leads to connection, and also with self. Mhmm. Connection with self.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yeah. Beautiful. You have been so generous, and I just have this, like, hanging thought in my mind, which is I don't think a lot of the listeners are gonna know what a compliance analyst does

Melissa Rauen:

and what pulled you Oh, yes.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Towards it. So can we just take a real quick hop sketch and just explain what that is, what pulled you towards it?

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. Well, I feel funny because I still feel like I'm new. You know, I'm I'm not quite 6 months into this compliance. They call it GRC World, which was new to me. It's governance, risk, compliance.

Melissa Rauen:

So currently, in my first 5 months, my day to day has been we've done one audit. So I was evidence gathering where we have frameworks, like people might be familiar with PCI or HIPAA or FedRAMP is a federal framework that we follow to

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And for the global audience, things like GDPR, Basel III, etcetera. Yeah. Okay.

Melissa Rauen:

Perfect. Thank you. So we have a few different frameworks. SOC 2 is another one. And each of those frameworks have controls that it says you must do x y z with your training your personnel, running background checks, and it goes into engineering as well with code deployments.

Melissa Rauen:

And I was gathering evidence on that, so I looked through those frameworks. I also do vendor risk assessments. So when we're bringing new vendors, it's our supply chain, and I assess the risk that bringing this vendor in is going to add to our environment. And those are probably the top two things I do as an analyst right now, but I know that it grows.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yes. And I know

Melissa Rauen:

that there's a lot more that expands beyond just those 2.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yes. And so the compliance well, GCR could include things like process design. It could include data formulations. It could include governmental, like you said, governmental regulations. It could even include behavior audits, which is fascinating.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

So if if some of this is pinging in your brain, dear listener, this is something that you wanna check out on Google. Right? GCR. You can also check out compliance analyst. You can check out cyber secure like, there's just so many elements to this area that open up.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

And most of us have no idea that it's there. The only reason I know any of this is because I happened to be the person assigned to a g's GRC project, which then opened up a world for me when GDPR came in. So global data something compliance, which is European.

Melissa Rauen:

Mhmm.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

I happened to already have that experience, and so I had the confidence to to throw my hat in the ring to lead the change for the implementation on 6,000,000, client accounts. It's a really interesting, intriguing, and not well known piece of technology.

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. It is not well known. I really I laugh at the funny story. I think people could relate just being in tech. I have people ask me what I do, and my parents included.

Melissa Rauen:

And I I try to break it into the simplest terms possible, and I still get blank stares.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

And I'm kind of at the point where I'm like, it doesn't really matter what I do. Let's talk about something else. Let me tell you about my trail runs or our dogs or something because it just it is not very well known. It is very important. We work very closely with our security team.

Melissa Rauen:

And so and definitely, there's a lot of moving pieces with it. Yeah.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

There was I cannot remember who it was. It was at the Grace Hopper celebration a few years ago before 2020. We were all in person. And I can't I'm so sorry that I cannot remember her name or even the company she was with, but she was really, really senior. And she said, when you think about your risk team, you think about your security team, you think about your compliance team, here's what I want you to think of.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

1 of 2 things, and she had this really cool image behind her. She said, on 1, it's thinking about the unintended consequences and preventing them. And on the other, it's acknowledging the unintended consequences and resolving them. Wow. That's such an interesting way to think about it, and it's definitely not a full and complete picture.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

But I think it makes it, like, a little simpler for, you know, lay people to sort of kind of get it. Like, Yes.

Melissa Rauen:

Maybe not. That makes it digestible.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Yeah.

Melissa Rauen:

I might need to start using that explanation when I'm explaining it to others.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

If it comes to me, I'll send you an email. But I I remember where it's like those moments where people bring wisdom to you. I remember where I was. I remember the image behind her, and I forget everything else. So a fantastic woman in technology that brought that into my life.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Thank you so much because I'm sharing it

Melissa Rauen:

to our community here on

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

the podcast, which then brings us to your brave role model.

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. I have been thinking so much about this, and I am excited to say it's my parents who have been married for 42 years. And I think the way that they partner is so inspirational. Now I get to I'm at the point where I'm getting to reflect on growing up and, how they parented. And I can start to realize I mean, I'm not a parent myself yet, and I can start to just think about the decisions and the scenarios that they went through.

Melissa Rauen:

And every new phase of life is unknown. Like, when I have an older brother as well, and when I go to middle school and I was asking to go to the movies, and then when we started driving and left for college and my parents would take new jobs or change roles, And now they're helping their parents who are aging.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Wow.

Melissa Rauen:

And to not take the easy path and to keep on with strength and hope, it's leading by example and never giving up. And I think that is the bravery is to walk with that freedom, strength, and hope in the face of unknown. Because I when I think of bravery too, it doesn't feel like bravery. It feels terrifying. It feels embarrassing.

Melissa Rauen:

It's uncomfortable. Yes. That's bravery. And so I I'm just in awe of the bravery that they've had in every unknown next chapter.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Thank you so much for sharing that. Yeah. Yeah. It's so true. What a beautiful thing.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

What a beautiful thing that we give the people around us when we do feel the terror and the discomfort and then have that brave moment of choosing to be in that and move forward. Beautiful. Beautiful. So one of the things that I've heard from my audience is the desire for a few words of encouragement for other women.

Melissa Rauen:

Do you

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

have any that you'd like to share?

Melissa Rauen:

Yes. I think it'll go back to being brave and let go of the doing. If you feel yourself trapped in performance to and it it's huge, and it's really hard to start, and it probably feels daunting. And I'm open to anybody with questions. I mean, like we've said at the beginning, we are still on this path.

Melissa Rauen:

We're all together in it. And I'd emphasize just letting go of the societal expectations and following your path of strength and hope and authenticity. And it's not it's not a waste of time in what you're doing. If I was just speaking out to somebody. What you're doing today matters, and you're doing a good job.

Melissa Rauen:

You're doing a good job. And to feel that is the best thing in the world, to feel like you are doing a good job and letting it sink in, and keep pressing forward to being your most authentic self. Beautiful.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Thank you so much. Yeah. So your LinkedIn will be in the show notes, and I heard you say, hey. If you have any questions, reach out. So Yes.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Melissa, thank you so much for being a guest.

Melissa Rauen:

Oh, Thank you. I'm thrilled to be part of the Brave community, and I've been able to connect with a few of your other speakers as well. And I hope this resonated with at least one listener today.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

Oh, that is for sure. 100%. Okay. Till next time, everyone. Bye.

Nicole Trick Steinbach:

If the Build Your Brave Career podcast is helping you flip the script in your own career, if it's helping you reduce your stress, work smarter, or create more income, Please share this with a friend. Till next time, you are already brave. Now, go build your brave.