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You’re tired.
Not just physically; though yeah, that too.
You’re tired in your bones. In your soul.
Trying to be a steady husband, an intentional dad, a man of God… but deep down, you feel like you’re falling short. Like you’re carrying more than you know how to hold.
Dad Tired is a podcast for men who are ready to stop pretending and start healing.
Not with self-help tips or religious platitudes, but by anchoring their lives in something (and Someone) stronger.
Hosted by Jerrad Lopes, a husband, dad of four, and fellow struggler, this show is a weekly invitation to find rest for your soul, clarity for your calling, and the courage to lead your family well.
Through honest stories, biblical truth, and deep conversations you’ll be reminded:
You’re not alone. You’re not too far gone. And the man you want to be is only found in Jesus.
This isn’t about trying harder.
It’s about coming home.
Want to tell you about some events that we have coming up in the Dad Tired ministry in just a couple weeks. September 20th to 22nd, we are going to be doing our dad tired annual retreat. I think this is by far the most powerful event that we do all year. It is a weekend where guys from all over the country and with some guys from around the globe, I.
Are coming to just be poured into, take a break from their responsibilities as a husband, father, and worker, and just figure out, again, what it looks like to be men, the men that God's called them to be. And so would love for you to be part of this. We're gonna have hundreds of guys there, but we're running out of space and running outta time.
So if you wanna be part of that, make sure you go to dat tire.com, click the annual retreat tab and get your last minute tickets for that the very next weekend. We're going to do a dad tired conference in Knoxville, Tennessee. We do these little conferences, the, these one day conferences all over the country and world and, um, they're from nine to noon-ish and they usually will have lunch afterwards.
They're jam packed, but they are gospel centered information on what it looks like for you to lead your family well. So if you are in Knoxville area, make sure you come to that on September 28th. On October 12th, I'm going to be doing one of these at the joint base Lewis in Washington. This is for our military, so it's not open to the public, but if you are a Department of Defense ID holder, you can come to that.
So again, that's the joint base Lewis in, um, Washington would love for you to be part of that if you're able to, obviously. That's going to be a small group of people, but if you have a Department of Defense, ID come with us as we share the gospel to our military men, which is so awesome. Really, really excited about that.
November 9th, we have a conference in Marie in Idaho. Again, that's one of those one day conferences. In the mornings I. A lot of you guys reached out and asked for more information on that. We didn't have all the details quite nailed down. We do for sure know that date is right and the the in Meridian Idaho is right.
So just mark your calendar and then check the website in the coming weeks. 'cause we'll get all the information set up on that exact addresses and all that for you. And registration links for November 9th. And then on February 27th to March 1st, we're gonna be doing a, we're partnering with the church in Perold.
We've been there many times and excited about that partnership. And I'll be speaking at a men's retreat there, and so if you wanna get more information on that, go to dad tired.com. If you don't see one near you and you want to have one near you or at your church if you're a pastor, or you can shoot this to your pastor, we do these again.
We've been doing them for like seven, eight years now. Or we come to churches and we just. Pour into the men of that church. It is. We've seen guys come to know Christ, we've seen baptisms and we've seen lives changed at these. They're very powerful events. So if you want to have one of these at your church, make sure you just email us hello@dadtire.com or you can get that information on dad tire.com.
We would love to partner with you, or if you've got some kind of men's breakfast or men's retreat or something you're looking for speakers, we'd love to partner with you in that. Just go to dad tire.com and you can get all the information on that. Before we jump in, I do wanna thank my friends over at Reformation Heritage.
Books for sponsoring today's episode. Some of you I know are excited about jumping into the Puritans. You've heard about the Puritans and the wisdom of the Puritans, and yet you don't know where to begin. Reformation Heritage Books put out a resource called Puritan Treasures for today, and it is very powerful.
It makes the riches of these godly writers of old accessible for you, the modern reader. They've updated the language and they've got helpful introductions. The classic works from these puritans are put together by John Owen, Jeremiah Burrows, and many, many more. They're perfect for you. As a starting point to jump into, again, the wisdom of the Puritans and for the Curious Reader, you can learn more about these, the Puritan treasures.
By going to heritage books.org/puritan treasures. Again, that's heritage books.org/puritan treasures. We'll put a link in the show notes for you. You can also use promo code dad tired and you'll actually get 10% off your order. Again, that's Heritage books.org/puritan treasures and use the promo code. Dad tired for 10.
I've had this idea for the last, I don't know, probably months, something I wanted to do here on the Da Tire Podcast, and for whatever reason, I just keep like talking myself out of it. I just keep thinking, that's a dumb idea. I shouldn't do that. I don't know. It keeps popping up. Sometimes you ask yourself like, is this from God?
Is it, is this the Lord speaking to me? That's always a, we always have that question as believers, like, is that God speaking to me, or is that like my lunch that I ate? And so sometimes you're, you're trying to get a gauge on what you're actually feeling in your soul. I always say like, one, does it make sense with the scriptures?
Like, does the scriptures teach us? We know what God's reputation is like based on the scriptures. If we don't read the scriptures, then we make up who we want God to be in our head. And then it's very confusing to hear his voice. 'cause you don't know, actually know what his voice sounds like. But when you read the scriptures, you get to know the God of the universe, what he's like, what his personality's like, how he does things, what his reputation is.
And then when you have these kind of feelings of like, is that God speaking, you just test it against the scriptures. Well, does that make sense with God's reputation? So that's one way. Another way is does it go away? Is this like a one-time idea and then just kinda left? Or is this something that keeps prodding you and prodding you and prodding you that oftentimes is the Holy Spirit just nudging you?
Again, if it makes sense with God's word, God will never tell you to do something that doesn't make sense with his reputation and that we find in His word. But does it go away? Is he nudging us towards his reputation and his character that we find in the scriptures? And then another way that you can kind of decipher that would be.
If I bring this to some other believers who I trust love me and love Jesus, and I test it against it, like I toss out that idea, can I hear the wisdom? And I always say like, you don't need that. That doesn't need to be 50 people. But it can be like three people, two people that you really trust, that love Jesus, know the word of God and love you, and just say, Hey, I've got this thing that just keeps coming up over and over and over.
What do you think about it? And hear the wisdom from other believers. So those are some ways that you can test. Is this from God or is this just some weird feeling that I have? So. That being said, I've had this feeling or this kind of prompting for months, and I just keep thinking like, nah, that's a dumb idea.
This, you shouldn't do this. But anyway, the, the prompting was to essentially lead us in this podcast through a time of guided prayer. Now, some of you heard that and you're just like, next, like, I'm, I'm, I'm here for some quick information and I'm ready to leave. I just highly encourage you pro don't leave.
You've already allotted this time to. Be equipped to be the man that God's calling you to be. So just, just like lean into it. I will say this is not really like a passive podcast episode. A lot of the podcast episodes that we do, you can listen to as you're working out or driving around town. I. Or maybe mowing the lawn or the kids are running around.
Sometimes you can just do multiple things at once, and the podcast is kind of playing in the background. I would say this one is a little bit more active, like you would need to be engaged, and so if this is not a time for you to like engage fully, give your full attention, then maybe just pause it, bookmark it, and come back to it.
That being said, I would also bookmark this because the guided prayer that I want to take us through today I think is something that will help you reset yourself as a man. Multiple times, not just like a one-time thing, but this could be something that you do daily, weekly, monthly, just to kind of reset yourself.
The scriptures say in one Thessalonians five that we should pray without ceasing. I mean, we're just constantly praying we should live this life of prayer. And dude, I, I know for me, I talked about this recently in the episode called Be Wary of good times, dude, sometimes it's very, very hard to get in a routine of prayer.
I think part of that is that. Years ago, I put this quote out on Instagram. I said, to not pray is to silently declare that you have more power over your situation than Jesus does. Which I still feel that that conviction, I felt that personally. And so I put it out there and it just seems to resonate with a lot of people because when we don't pray, what we're essentially doing quietly is saying.
I don't really need, God, I, I can probably fix this or handle this or take care of my own life on my own. I can provide for my family. I can keep myself productive and healthy, and I can protect my family. I can do everything I need to do as a man by myself. And it's when you get in those situations where you realize you can't, I.
Where something out of your control pops up into your life, a sick child, bad news, bad news about your work or your marriage, or you're in the middle of a fight or financial strain, whatever it is, you quickly realize like, I am not at all in control. I desperately need God to show up. And you find yourself praying because you realize I'm not a good God.
I need God, I need a better God than me to figure this out because clearly I am not in control here. And so we want to be those kind of men as leaders of our family. Men who pray without seizing men who have a constant posture of prayer. Really what that means is I'm not just being, I'm. A man who's a disciplined man, and I'm, I'm good at like, doing all the things I'm supposed to do, but really being a man of prayer means that I'm a man of dependence.
I know that my family needs more than me. My family needs a better version of me. They need, they don't just need like daddy, they need a better daddy. They need a better father, a better provider, a better protector, a better forgiver. So it's to pray without seizing means I'm not ceasing to remember that there's one who's better at being in control than me.
And so I constantly submit my life, my will, my sinful desires, my lustful desires, my greed, my impulsiveness. I submit all of it, my fears, my worries, my anxiety. I submit all of it to the throne of God and I say, God, it's me praying. It's another way of coming to you and reminding myself, I am not God. You are God.
You are the one in control and I desperately need you. And so I just thought that's a hard posture to get in. I know many of us are not disciplined in that, and so we want to grow. I know if you're listening to this podcast and you're a dad tired guy, you likely feel that desire that you want to be a man of prayer, a man who is desperate for God to show up, and yet your days just keep getting filled.
Your boss keeps asking you to do more. Your to-do list keeps getting full. Your email inbox doesn't ever get to zero. Your text messages. Your things that you need to get done around the house, bills that need to get paid. Everything just keeps filling up and you're like, when do I actually stop and just put myself into a posture where I say, God, I need you.
And so I'm offering that to you today for the next few minutes that I would just help us together. Like all of us together would come before God for a few minutes and say, God no, I'm serious. Like. I really don't wanna be God of my own life. I want you to be God of my life. And so, Lord, I submit myself to you.
So I'm going to use the Lord's prayer as a template for us to, uh, when his disciple, when Jesus disciples ask, like, how do, how do we pray? He used this prayer, and so it's important. We've heard it a million times. You've heard it recited a million times. And so as always, whenever that happens, we can become numb to things, but really lean in and listen to this Lord's prayers.
We use it as a template to just do what Jesus taught us. He taught us how to pray and so we want to use it as a way to say, okay, God, I wanna pray the way you've taught me how to pray. And so let's just take a few minutes, we'll pray, and then you can go do whatever dude you had on your to-do list today.
But imagine nothing is more important. There's nothing you can get done today that that would be more important than submitting yourself to the God of the universe and reminding yourself that he's God and you're not. So just pause for 30 seconds here. Quiet your heart. There's gonna be a million things that want to distract you over the next few minutes.
Keep fighting. Keep getting your brain back to God and the things of God. Take a deep breath.
God, we come to you. We want to give this time to you. We want our hearts to be focused on you. Jesus said in Matthew nine, our father in heaven hallowed be thy name. We're going to start our prayer by just adoring God, recognizing that God is holy and we are not, and putting ourself in right relationship, that he is God and we are not.
We want to get to the spot where we are reflecting on and posturing our hearts to realize that God is great. God is holy. We are his sons. We are heirs. But first he is God in heaven. He's the one who has all things in control. Habakkuk two says, the Lord is in the holy temple. Let all the earth keep silence before him.
One John three, one says, see what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called sons of God.
Just pray this after me. It's okay just to say, literally to repeat these words that I'm praying. God, you are holy. God, you are perfect. There is none like you. You're majestic. You're powerful. You are like none other. There is no one like you. God. God. Thank you for adopting me into your family. God, before I'm a husband, before I'm even a dad.
Before I'm a worker. Before I am, whatever my business card would say, I am God. I'm just a son of yours. I'm adopted by you. I'm loved by you. Lord, let me rest in my sonship today that the Holy God of the universe loves me, fully, loves me. With all of my work and identity, everything that I accomplished today come out of that identity that I'm just a deeply loved son of yours.
Take 10 seconds and just whatever you need to say to God in this moment about His holiness, about him being, God about you being a son, just however you would say that in your own words. There is no perfect way to pray. There's no right way to pray. Just 10 seconds. In your own words, what do you wanna say to God about his holiness and about you being his son?
Matthew six 10. Your kingdom come, your will be done on Earth as it is in heaven. Our goal for this section of the prayer is to really submit ourselves to God's will again, reminding ourselves that God is God and we are not. There are so many things that we want to accomplish for our own life. I have so many goals, so many things that I'm trying to accomplish and career and work and in my marriage and with my kids and finances.
But ultimately I wanna say, God, your kingdom come, your will be done. God, whatever you want to accomplish in my life. God, whatever you want to accomplish in my family, whatever you want to accomplish through me at my work and in my community, I submit them to you. You are God. I am not. I want your will more than I want my will.
We think through verses like Matthew 6 33 that says, seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. There's so many things that are first, before we're thinking about God's kingdom and his righteousness. We have all the things that we want to accomplish.
Would we reverse it today? Would we say, God, I have a lot of things that I wanna accomplish, but first, I want you God, first. I want your kingdom first. I want your righteousness. Ephesians two 10 says, we, we are God's handwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works. God has put us together. To do his good work, his glory, and so pray with me you again, you, it's okay to repeat these words after me if it helps.
Just kind of give you words to say, but Lord, I submit my life to you today. Lord, I say, my life is yours. It's not mine.
Lord, my family is yours, not mine. My goals are yours, not mine. God, I want you more than I want anything else. I want your will to be done more than I want my dreams and my goals.
God, would your kingdom come in my house? Would your kingdom come in my family? God, allow me to lead my family in a way that that reflects you and your love. In your grace
Lord, your will be done on earth in my life as it is in heaven. If you need to talk to God for, again, 10, 20 seconds, just tell him. If there, if there's something in you that you, you're so desperately wanting your will, and you just need to flip it back and say, God, I don't more than all the stuff I wanna accomplish.
I want your, I wanna seek your kingdom and your righteousness more than anything else. If you just need talk to God for 10, 20 seconds in your own words.
Matthew six 11 says, give us this day our daily bread. In this passage, in this section we're gonna talk about, uh, just remembering that our daily provision, the way that we provide for our family is not us. We work our butts off, dude. Like we're gonna, I'm gonna, if God has given me a body to work, I'm gonna use my body, my brain, my wisdom, my experience, the talents God's given me.
I wanna use every single thing I've got. To provide for my family to not be lazy, to work my butt off, to make sure that they've got a roof over their heads, some food to eat. That is our call as men, but also all of that is dependent on God showing up. The fact that I've got air in my lungs and a body to work and a brain to think all of this is God's grace.
His wisdom, his provision to say, all right, you're in charge. You have the ability to go provide for your family. But all of it is foundational that I'm relying on God and his grace, his mercy, to allow me to do this. And so I'm not the one who gives my family daily bread. God is the one who gives my family the daily bread.
And then any other specific things I need? There are lots of things your family needs right now. Some of it is monetary. It could quite literally be food. It could be rent and mortgages. It could be grace. It could be baby supplies. It could be more forgiveness. It could be figuring out how are we gonna get into that school that we really want?
How are we gonna make homeschooling work? How are we gonna make the schedule work? It doesn't seem to fit. How are we gonna do that new job? I really want that new job, but how's that gonna work? Or, well, am I gonna be able to kind of be smart enough or have good enough resume or interview well enough to get it?
We're submitting all of that like we just did in that last section, but we're also saying, God, you are our provider. There's so many things that I want to take control of. I have anxiety over because I don't have control over it. I really want to, we're submitting all that to you, and then we're saying, give us, God.
You give us the things that we need for sustenance today. Whatever we need, God, we trust you. Philippians four 19, and my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. God will meet. All your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. It's not all your wants.
It's not your wishlist on Amazon. It's everything you need for today. God will provide it for you today. Psalm 23, 1. The Lord is my shepherd. So what I shall not want, God is in control. He's my provider. He's my protector. So I don't want anything. I just want God because I know he's the best shepherd. He's the best provider.
I do what I'm called to do. I seek his righteousness. I work my butt off. But ultimately, God is my shepherd. He is my provider. And so I shall not want Psalm 23, 1. Pray this with me. God, I trust you. I trust you to provide for me. I trust you to provide for my family. God, you are my provision. Each day, God give me wisdom.
As I lead my family, God give me wisdom as I try to steward the resources you've given me.
God, we beg for your wisdom to be men who provide well to work hard, but ultimately, Lord, we pray that you would keep us desperate and reminded that you are our provider. And so God, as you taught us how to pray.
Would you be our provider today? God, would you give us our daily bread? God, would we clear out everything that's taking up our focus, and would we seek you first? I want to seek you first. God, give me my daily bread. Give my family what they need for today. Take 10 to 20 seconds. You've got needs in your own family, bro.
You've got own your own things that you guys are thinking about and stressed about. Take that to God right now. 10 to 20 seconds. Spend some time asking the Lord to provide for you to make a way. I.
Matthew six 12. Forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. This is one of the hardest things to do, but in this section it is the confession of sin. To recognize again that even though God is faithful to complete in us, what he started, we are becoming more like him even when we don't feel like it, he is making us more like him.
Part of that becoming more like him means that we constantly bring our sin before our face. To the forefront of our mind. We used to be men who didn't care about our sin. We used to be men who buried our sin, but now as men who are trying to lead their family well, to be the men god's called us to be, we don't bury it.
We don't ignore it. We face it head on because we know there's a God of grace and we ask God to, to put it in front of us, to bring it to the front of our mind so that we can repent of it and ask God that he would forgive us.
One John one, nine. If we confess our sins, he's faithful and just, and will forgive us our sins, bro. Just rest in that Good news. You are afraid to bring up your sin because you think that there's shame that God would be mad at you. One John one, nine. If we confess our sins, he's faithful and just, and will forgive you of your sins.
Which leads you to Ephesians 4 32. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ, God forgive you. So as you sit in your own forgiveness, as you swim in the waters of mercy that you just experienced, now you get to offer that to somebody else. You don't deserve God's grace.
You don't deserve God's forgiveness, and yet he allows. He pours it out on you lavishly. And so you are able to, beyond your own ability, beyond your own humanity and brokenness and sinfulness you can pour out. You can lavish somebody else with grace and mercy and forgiveness that they don't deserve because you remember you were in a spot that you did not deserve grace and forgiveness and he gave it to you.
Pray this after me, father. I confess my sins to you. I confess all the ways I've fallen short this week, this month. I confess all the ways that I turn to other things to satisfy my soul. I confess that I've chased other lovers outside of you. I. I confess that I have chased after things that I thought would give me more joy than you would.
I confess that I've succumbeded to temptations, I've taken shortcuts. I have not lived up to the way that you design things to be. Forgive me, God.
Lord, let me experience your grace and your forgiveness. Again, thank you God for your steadfastness in my life. Thank you for your long suffering in my life. Thank you that you are making me a new man. Thank you that you will complete in me what you started. God, as I experience your forgiveness. Help me show that same forgiveness to other people in my life.
Help me to forgive my wife quickly. Help me to forgive my kids quickly. Help me to forgive the people at work, the people around me and my community. Quickly, as you quickly forgive me, God allow me to show the same kind of grace towards everyone around me. As you've shown towards me, you do. Um, if we're just being honest, brother, you, you've got your own sins that you need to confess.
Stuff that came straight to your mind. And again, this is not to bury you in shame. If you are a follower of Jesus, you don't have to swim in the waters of shame. You get to swim in the waters of grace. You have a God who is faithful and just to forgive you, and he'll keep forgiving you and he keeps forgiving you and he keeps forgiving you because he loves you and he's making you more like him.
And so you confess freely, those things likely came straight to your mind today. And bro, just confess them. Confess them out loud. Be specific. Don't confess generally about generalized sin. Confess specifically about the sins that you've committed so that you can find healing, grace and forgiveness. Take 10 to 15 seconds, confess your specific sins to God so that you can experience his forgiveness.
Matthew six 13 lead us not in temp temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.
The second you turn off this podcast, you go back into the real world. You take off your headphones, you get outta the car. The real world hits again. You've probably even been tempted in the last few minutes that you've been listening to this podcast. It will bombard you. And so we ask for God to, again, the temptation is not the sin, bro.
We've talked about this before. Talked about that on that podcast. Be wary of good times. The temptation is not the sin. You will be bombarded, but we ask God to not lead us into temptation, but deliver us to give us a freedom, a way out from the evil one one Corinthians 10 13. No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind, and God is faithful.
He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. Second Thessalonians three. Three. The Lord is faithful. He will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one. Praise God. Pray this with me Lord. Protect me. Protect me from the traps and temptations of the enemy. Protect my family. Protect my wife from temptation.
Protect my kids from temptation. Would we be a family who finds satisfaction in you and you alone? God protect us from all the plans that the enemy has for me, that he has for my marriage, that he has for my kids.
God, help me, lead my family with integrity. Deliver us from the evil in this world. Take 10 to 20 seconds, bro, and just however you need to say that in your own words. The temptations that you specifically struggle with, that God would deliver you from that the evil that is in your life specifically that God would deliver you, protect you from that, protect your family from that.
Ephesians three 20 says Now to him, who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine according to his power. That is at work within us. Praise God, bro. Everything you just asked for God can do immeasurably more than you just asked. Not only more than you just asked. More than you can imagine.
He will protect you, provide for you, forgive you more than you can ask or imagine. His will can be done more in your life than you can even ask or imagine. Praise God. I appreciate you guys for leaning into that. I know that's different. It's different than what we normally do on this podcast, bro. Uh, again, this might be a podcast that you save.
You come back to once a week, once a month, and just kind of reset yourself. Re pray those prayers over and over. Everything's gonna change. The temptations are gonna change the things that you need, God to show up, the provision. It all changes weekly, daily, and so just come back to this man. Make it part of your normal routine until it starts to feel so rhythmic to you that you're able to just kind of do it on your own.
Or maybe it's helpful to just have these guided prayers for you. But I love you guys. I'm, I'm so grateful that you leaned into this. If you made it this far, lemme pray for you. And then, bro, go crush your day. Be the son that God's called you to be. The husband God's called you to be the Father. God's called you to be.
Jesus. Thank you. Thank you that you hear our prayers. We're not praying to a temple or statue. You we're not praying to an idea. We are praying to the alive God of the universe, the one who holds up every star in the universe. You know, every wave that is crashing right now, every drop of rain that is coming down, you know what?
Where every piece of sand is placed. God, you are in control of all things. You know all things. You are above all things. You are the God of Gods, the Lord of lords, the one who sits on his throne, who puts the earth as his footstool. God, nothing shakes you or bothers you or gives you anxiety. You are the holy God set apart, different from us, different from all creation.
There is none like you. God, thank you that in the midst of all that power and glory you hear your sons praying, you hear your children praying. Even that Lord, that you would hear that as we petition you, God, you would hear and then do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine. God, keep our hearts close to you.
Protect these men as they go into their day to be the men God's called them to be. You've called them to be Lord. Empower them by your Holy Spirit to be the kind of husbands, fathers, men, sons of you that you've called them to be. Thank you for your grace and your mercy. Would we pour it out lavishly on others?
It's in your name we pray. Amen. I love you brothers. Have a great rest of your day.