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Just My POV is a raw, real, and refreshing talk show where a millennial aunt and her Gen Z nephew go head-to-head on everything—love, money, culture, gender roles, and the messy parts of growing up in two different worlds.
They don’t always agree.
They don’t hold back.
But they always keep it real.
Each episode dives into the generational gap, the clash of values, and the moments that spark deep reflection—or full-blown arguments.
It’s not about who’s right.
It’s just their point of view.
When your friend borrows money from you. Yeah. But then your friend goes on social media and it starts to post vacation post. Do you think that it is wrong to go on social media? Money is a very sensitive thing when it comes to friendships. You post the person, you post the receipt, you post anything postable, my dear posted. Exactly. That's what happened. When you're in a friend group, everybody is supposed to be friends and look out for each other. There's no excuse for a group out of that group creating a group to talk about another person in the friends group. I think people feel so comfortable telling you just because of okay, maybe you guys are friends. You're choosing not to say certain things because you want to preserve the relationship. If you have a friend that you follow on on social media, if that person is always posting things that you are not interested in, is it okay to unfollow the friend? Please just mute me and don't tell Your social media is yours. It's your data. It's your time. There comes a time when you're growing up. You're basically doing things that make you happy. You're not trying to do anything that upsets you. I feel like you're allowed to unfollow the person. Guys, I don't know. Guys usually don't message babes and move with the flow. That's the reason why I doubt that he just likes her as a friend. A guy is only going to talk to you because he first of all finds you sexually attractive. [Music] Hey guys, we're here again for the freshest podcast on the planet. Just my That's right. As you well know, I am Pearl Cardi and I'm Kelvin. And today we're talking about friends. Friends just do too much. Tell me about it. I feel like I feel like friends like to because they your friends and they know that you like them, they like to try you, you know, they like to test you, test your limits whether you are going to react or not so that they can judge you and they can sit down and say, "hm, that's how she behaves." Yeah. Now this has brought me to the first topic and I know it has happened. It has happened to you before. So I want you to even talk about it and how it made you feel and how you managed through it. So often times we have friends and our friends are there to be there for us as friends but then often times they need you to also be there for them. As a matter of fact they need you to be there more than you need them to be there for you. So when your friend borrows money from you Yeah. and it's been a while the time has elapsed. Your friend is now owing you money. But then your friend goes on social media and it starts and starts to post vacation posts. I mean, I'm just wondering, you've messaged them, you DM'd them. What are you going to do to get your money back? What did you do? How like how Okay, so I've been in a little bit of a situation where my friend collected a sum of money from me. And you know usually when your friend wants to collect money from you they're like ah half a guy and let me collect this money I'll give you on they usually will give you a date right and now like she gave me a date the date was supposed to be like the following weekend. Mhm. Right. And that time had reached and nothing. She didn't say anything and and it was very annoying when she didn't say anything because you understand like now you're putting me in a situation where I have to tell you a guy what's up what of the money now and in my mind me I was saying that ah more if anything I don't want to fight with this person because of money because if I'm being very honest I've also collected money from this person the only difference here is that when the time to give it to reach I gave it and if for any reason I was unable to I came up with an excuse. You understand? So, this is not a friendship where okay, it's only me they're collecting from. We've done this a lot of times and now you just choose to be quiet like no explanation that oh Kelvin this happened though or I will I wouldn't be able to give you your money on this particular day or nothing. Yeah. So, what did you do? That's what I'm saying. That's why we're having this conversation. Well, me I stayed and had a conversation with someone. All right. So I had a conversation with someone else in the friend group telling the person that ah what's up um this particular person has taken this money from me and did not return the money or I don't know what to say but like I hinted this person and I'm somebody who if you're owing me I'm not even going to remind you of the money as a matter of fact I'm fine with you owing me unless I need the money like if I need the money now and I'm short of 10 naira everything in my brain goes to who is weighing me who is weighing me who is weighing me naturally you know, and that's when I'm going to call you. So, I'm not calling you because I want to give you some more time. I'm calling you as an hour. Okay. So, do you think so do you think that when somebody owes you like that and then the person because I talked about posting vacation post not you're just talking about your experience but anyways this person was going out now chill calm down. So that's what I'm saying. Once a person starts to post like vacation uh post or videos or things like oh I'm having such an amazing time. Do you think that it is wrong especially when you've messaged the person in their personal message? Do you think that it's wrong to go on social media and blast the person or call the person out? Be honest personally is not something I'll ever do. Do you think it's wrong? It's wrong to blast the person on. So you only person there I will tell you that if you're going to blast someone on social media maybe you're reaching out to the person and the person is ignoring that's what I'm saying okay then the person now yeah and then the person is now posting vacation post and that's your friend you post the receipt you post anything postable my posted exactly that's what happened that was my question disgrace this person even something that didn't happen because you know come on that's why when I started started this podcast today. I was saying that friends like to try you. It's like they just want to test you something so that they can judge you make any sense that what even hurts me the most is that this is even another scenario where this person didn't borrow money from me but was owing me for a particular service right and I messaged this person this person boyfriend have money that's the funniest part most of the people that owe have money that's what even pissed this person off um as for the day rich he pass and I now came randomly and said um next scene Kelvin doesn't even know how to like there are certain things that you do what do you mean um what do you mean um and then I shared it with the rest of the people and they're like suit yourself or something like that or um but let's be honest guy that thing you did didn't make sense why would you tell someone um money is a very sensitive thing when it comes to friendships very very hold on hold on your friend group said that that I have an attitude. That's because you wrote M. Yeah, because I wrote M. Okay, so I wasn't really cool with the rest of them then. Wait, but it doesn't justify it. Please let me land because I see you trying to defend these people knowing that I'm about to just Okay, fire people. Wait, somebody is owing you money. Everybody in the friend group knows that this person owes you money and then the person isn't answering you and hasn't paid back. And then you now decide to message the person and only write M. Um. Oh. Um. Um. M regardless. Oh. Um. Okay. And then and then your friend's group, the entire group. Not the entire agreed that agreed that you were in the wrong for doing that. say I was in the wrong but think about it like they just really did give excuse for the girl and the fact that the money came immediately after immediately after last like a pistol but doesn't that tell you the kind of friends that you have I mean let's be honest and don't try to be weird things don't try to be weird make up for it please don't try to be weird if there's that's one thing I realized about a lot of friends groups. And I need to say this thing outright because people do it and then they just roll with it like it's normal. When you're in a friend group, yeah, everybody is supposed to be friends and look out for each other. There's no there's no excuse for a group out of that group creating a group to talk about another person in the friends group. So much so that when you're now in the gathering and then you say like you know how when your friends are offending you or people are getting at you and then you've been quiet and then the moment you now react everybody now becomes like a group to say you are wrong you are wrong bro. It tells you that you're in the wrong friends group. If you're at a table with a group of people and you feel alone, you're in the wrong friend group. Move because this situation that you just gave now, it's somebody that's owing you. And yeah, anybody can owe anybody. You don't always have money. But you couldn't even come out right to type exactly, yo, how far with my money. If you had written, yo, how far with my money? Will anybody What else would they say then? Okay. So this particular babe des how far with my money? The day passed. So then how far with my money? Then the day was extended. Oh guys, so sorry this this happened. But your boyfriend is spraying money in club. Like I don't want to know. Even if you're coming from under inside the gutters, ignore that. Even if you're coming from inside the gutters, your boyfriend has money. I feel like anyhow it is you are supposed to be able to ah they're spraying money on top of your head. You didn't now give me my money. Then I reminded you on the day you shifted it by one more week. Then I highlighted where I asked you for the money and said um do you understand what I mean? And that's the you blast me and say no this particular person I don't even talk to this person at all. Period. Because I was going to be like the money came immediately after it. The luck this person has is that we were not even in close proximity. If not all those remove all those four inches heels. I'll use it and knock your head. Oh my god. You would think right because I think people feel so comfortable telling you just because of okay maybe you guys are friends. You're choosing not to say certain things because you want to preserve the relationship. There's no need for that. And then someone wants to try you. This type of person deserves to be beaten. The fact that you paid after the fight. You see, if you blasted me and then I see that true true is poverty that is doing you and you pay me later. Fair. The fact that you blasted me now after I reminded you and then you paid me the money within 3 minutes. Yes. But that's the point. That's why that's why she blasted you because she know the money. Yeah. That's exactly how it works. So that means you had no intentions of paying. Well, you need to fight to get your money if your friend is only if your friend. That's one thing. That's one thing that I don't like. Usually when your friend borrows money from you, you often times have to go into a fight or go into a quarrel and then the other people in the friends group just because it is you that they about to give money to feel the need to be more loyal to the person who is who the money is removing from their body. But it doesn't mean that that person is right. Because if people eat, it's very annoying. They go out, they live their lives, they buy clothes. As a matter of fact, if there's a new party, they are going to show up and they will look the part. The fact that you don't even prioritize me enough, but the person would to give me my money. You fit soft your own life. You don't think I need my money. You don't. That's You should be beaten. I'm saying it because of the way I feel for this particular person. You should be beaten. And let me not catch you. Honestly, if I meet you, I'm going to talk to you. I must talk. That thing I didn't tell you that year. I will tell you. And if you try to be funny, I'm going to yank your wig off your head. If you have a friend that you follow on on social media, that person does not have to like be like your closest friend, but you're just familiar with the person. If that person is always posting things that you are not interested in or triggers you or upsets you or you just don't like or just post too much or post too little. I just want to ask, is it okay to unfollow the friend? That's very shady. Is it okay to unfollow? Because that's very shady. You feel it's shady. I mean, it's your social media. You can choose what you want to see. Okay. So, um, is it okay to I knew that would get you? No, that's very very wrong. That's okay. So why is it wrong? Okay. So, it's wrong because you know people people feel things like okay let's say for instance I'm someone's friend and uh probably my content is still boring for you or maybe it just generally gives you the ache right that's what I mean then you unfollow me please just mute me and don't tell me don't because I will cry or I'll feel very bad about I know you would I know you would I know you You will feel very very bad. I know you for that one. It's going to hurt you. You'll feel like oh my god. And I know that as a guys let me let me show you how Kelvin will be doing. He will be like he'll be like he'll hold his phone like [Laughter] literally it'll be like can you check this person is still following you. So that's how it will be. So the reason I'm asking this question is because your social media is yours. Your social media it's your data. It's your time is your space is what entertains you is what you like. Now you know this person but like that person that you were talking about in that other other episode where you were saying that that person's aesthetics you didn't like the person. So because of that you just didn't want to be friends with the person but you just had the person on social media. I just feel like there comes a time when you're growing up, especially when you're grown, like a millennial like me. I mean, you're basically doing things that make you happy. You're not trying to do anything that upsets you. If a certain person, even though the person is your friend, but the person has this way of posting things that triggers you or gives you the ick or that you just don't enjoy. I know that it's your data, it's your profile, it's your mobile device. Yeah. I feel like you're you're allowed to unfollow the person. I think you should mute the person. I personally have some people that I just don't like. I don't like their content. Some people even post things that I know maybe I'm guilty of those type of things. People me like what do you mean? I will mute you on everywhere. Not necessarily unfollow. You know that unfollow thing here. They will now sit down like this in the night. No, but why are they even checking to find out if you unfollowed or not if they don't already feel guilty? I mean, why are you even checking somebody find out? Hang on a minute. Because normally on your social media, you don't know who unfollows you or who follows you. Especially, especially when you've even reached like 100. It's not as if when one person is minor to show you that it wouldn't show you like that. So I mean if somebody unfollows unfollows you because you're boring or because whatever you trigger them how is it that you are quick to know that this person followed you if you're not checking that only means that there's something you're doing. It means that you feel guilty. It means that you are aware of what you've done and you're not checking who which one of your followers or which one of the people that you know have unfollowed you based on what you've done is a guilty conscience thing. And as an adult, like fully grown woman, I don't really see why I should be inconveniencing myself because I don't want you to feel bad. Most often, people don't do things because of how they think you feel. They always do things based on how they feel. Yeah. So it's like in your adulthood, why do you have to suffer watching this person day after day trigger you, upset you, do things and then the person now when you now unfollow silently because unfollowing is silent. You know that when you now unfollow silently the person now goes, you have unfollow me, bro. Chill. Now I haven't done this. I haven't unfollowed anyone. Truth be told, no, I'm being honest. I have I haven't unfollowed anyone based on their being boring or anything like that. But I just feel that that is something that somebody can do and should feel free to do. Anything to stab keep your mental health stable, do it. Anything that makes you sleep well at night, do it. But if you do it to me, I'll unfollow you back and it will pay me. You might not show it, but like it's going to be very painful. But that's fine because I put in the work for my social med because they don't appreciate what I post. There are lots of people I used to have on my social media that I probably don't have anyone. Then they are newer people. I deliberately put in the work when I want to put up something on socials. I want to look nice. I want it to be interesting. I want it to be engaging. I put in all that effort. You can't just not put in any effort and expect me to sit there year after year looking at your page who don't do anything. Come on. It's like it's like when I meet new people and then they're like, oh, what's your Instagram? And then they follow and they say, I just followed you. And I'm like, okay. Then I go to their page and I'm like, you don't have any post. Why are you telling me to follow you? Yeah. Those people Yeah. In fact, or even on their bed, you now see laptop. Highlight is even good. Yeah. They'll just put one kind of I'm like even know you are the one following you. Nothing. I'm not keeping tabs with you on you or with you. I don't I don't know what's going on. That's not fair. You guys can be connected elsewhere. Yeah. Like call me. You don't necessarily have or message me on WhatsApp or something. I don't have to be on your social media. You don't have to be on mine. Let's just feel free. All this guilty conscience for no reason is just crazy. I mean, if you're not saying anything, why do you feel bad? Yeah. Why are you like that means you just you just want to be able to sit down and do this? Oh, see they are following me. This person is following me. Yeah. But sometimes you're having conversations with people and then you realize that because Okay. So I'm now in a very good relationship with this person. But I used to have a I used to have a best friend back then and we got into a fight. Yeah. And I wasn't even aware we were fighting because we had just settled one issue. But then there was someone shady in the circle and you know I do friendship a lot. They are just so random with fight who told her some things that just didn't add up. Right. So I had had a conversation about her because someone told me she said something about me and she had just settled with me two days before I heard what happened. So I'm like, how did she put in this much work to say all these things about me? That means that um um this thing whole closure that we had doesn't really make any sense. Now this person was so creative and made up an entirely different story about it. And so I was supposed to go back to school at the time and she had already gone to school. I had to stay back because of some reasons. But like I now resumed school I think a week later only to reach school like this. Before I even reach school, I was with one of my friend. The friend was like, "Oh, I like this girl." And I said, "Oh, yeah, yeah, she's pretty." So, I now opened her Instagram page already. I had noticed that my last post, she didn't like it. And you know, if you're doing friendship and you guys are always commenting on your posts, you would pay attention to those things. Besides this period, we were very shaky in this relationship. And then I realized she wasn't following me because I was like, "Oh, is it this particular girl?" Cuz I went through my following list. I typed her name out. I didn't see it. Then I went through my following list. I didn't see it. She had blocked me. Right. You know when you block someone? Yeah. You know, unfollowing is different from blocking. Sh. Okay. Go on. And and um so I now figured out that she doesn't follow me and then I can't see her account. But after swiping swiping, I was able to find her in like the DMs and um it's now showing user not found. May I first sat down? And I say I wasn't confused about where I started from because I have conversations with people and when I'm having this conversation I know who exactly I'm having that conversation with like I could I can talk a lot. I love to communicate with my mouth and tongue. We can see it right but for every information is for a particular air you know. So when she stopped and it leaves me um it leaves me thinking what do you think about what people term gossiping but generally it's just having a conversation with a friend like someone hear a gist that ah you said something about someone like you have your reservations about people yeah and then you have already said that oh some shady things about this person which often times is the truth you add some fizzy so that the juice to be sweet I don't but but me I might had. Yes, that's Jenz% of the time. It's very accurate what happened. And now the G come out, somebody now hears it and then they are so offended that you had that conversation behind them. Don't you think it's okay for people to have conversations with certain people in the absence of certain people? Do you understand? So, so here's really gossiping. So, here's the thing. Back to that conversation about friends and being in a friends group. Yeah. If you're friends with someone and the person does something that you don't like, you are meant to speak to the person who has done the thing that you do not like. But how about in this situation where we had talked about everything and we settled and now this is a new gist that they telling me this person said this about me. So so at the end it was a lie actually the person was just a satan. So that's what I'm trying to point out which is why it's important for you to speak to the person directly. That is why the person is your friend. is if the person isn't your friend. If you don't know that you have no communication with the person, then you can have a private conversation with your friend that oh this thing this person did this type of thing and I didn't like it. But because we're not friends, I cannot speak to the person. But if the person is your friend, it's very important for you to actually call the person that speakhow somehow. Now let me say something else. And another thing, please wait. And another thing about um trying to say that oh there was now this situation. So me and my friend now s we now talked about it. All that is just breeding a lot of negativity and a lot of yes you don't need all that. Okay. And also as an adult like me now I will never put fizzy or salt or pepper inside anything. If I put salt or pepper inside that thing, maybe you upsets me and I just want to say something out of anger, but not based on like I'm creating like a a story or making it more or worse or something like that. No, no, no, no. That's not that's not what we do here in this corner. Let me do like this because here it happens because there I think that yeah no I will always have my reservation and ady I wouldn't I would just say it as it is straight up see if it was if it's flat straight up I'm a straight up person but like no it doesn't even necessarily mean that I'm not straightforward because no no straight up is what I said straight up is a lot of my friends actually think that my mouth like it's just running as per a an outfit is not fine. You now tell the person that this one is not fine. No, that's not even what we're saying. No, this is okay. You know, at someone's back now, I want to also say that that thing is not fine. I mean, if I have a closer friend than you, I don't hate you. I just would have that conversation. I would tell the person that look at this like that. But why is it necessary to tell the person? Because it's sweet. You see, now that's back to what I said. It's not a lie. Not because I'ming about it, but I say it's your face, you only feel about yourself. That is back to what I said when I said that there's no need trying to be having side talks with another person. What is the essence? If the person's outfit isn't nice and you actually like the or the person is your friend, you are supposed to tell my friend, I want you to adjust this part. I want you to do this part. Not for you to create a side talk out of it. That I see I now see why you're in that situation without your friend because of this behavior. All of you are All of you have the same behavior and yenzies need to grow up and be accountable. When they do something, they know that they've done this thing and this is the repercussion. If the person does it back to you, just take it with your full chest. Don't feel bad. Speaking about friendships, it's very important for me to even ask this question, especially in you guys generation. In my generation, I know what it is like. Is it possible for a guy and a girl to be friends without any rumor of oh they're dating or like or they are flirting or they like is it really really real that a beautiful girl and a cool guy that has tease and all those can actually be friends without any string. Yeah. At all at all. Not friends with benefit at all. Um, it depends on the two people we're talking about. So, if the guy is a typical guy guy, that's what I'm saying. It's guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy guy I'm saying yeah most 80% of the time he likes you. He just maybe is not man enough to tell you or maybe he's man enough but you guys are just too close that you've gone past that stage where he can tell you that oh I like you because I mean you might now be telling him about other guys that like you and stuff you know and it's discouraging when you guys have bonded so well that you can tell him about people in your DM. So the thing is but he like you believe me and sometimes even the babe no see she can like him too the girl always like the guy to always like the truth about to an extent he likes her it's because they like each other that's why they are friends take notes possible that they could respect themselves enough not to be doing in your generation my generation I don't know about that I don't know but other people I've seen No, you you my lie. See tell me but you you are different. You just leave you you are different in your mind. In your mind you are part of the girls. So just remove you like this. So I'm talking about guys like guy you know those ones that I say bro you don't [Applause] I don't think that like you shape. I don't really think that that is possible. But that is that is also not a good thing. No, it's not good. It's actually not a good thing. It's a very very stressful thing because a lot of beautiful girls want to be friends and really cool with these guys. But then these guys are always trying to find one way. So you now have a version of them that is not like the wholesomeness of the person of the chick. She'll now be trying to be managing the situation and the friendship which gets very complicated. But I just wanted to ask about Jenz because I know with us millennials all your friendship don't worry we know it and guys I don't know guys usually don't message babes and move with the flow. That's the reason why I doubt that he just likes her as a friend. A guy is only going to talk to you because he first of all finds you sexually attractive. Guys only talk to you just because you're pretty. You're pretty and he can kiss you and talk to you. Guys only talk to you I found. Okay. So now, yeah, now that we're having this conversation strategy, see guys only talk to you or are nice to girls when they feel that they can get with you most of the time. And that's why I said that it's not a good thing. Now I realize this because even now as a woman when I see a man and I'm just oh hello good evening or well done sir or something. I realized that most of the time they have this tendency of thinking you find them special or you actually like them that's why you are saying those things and I never knew that earlier because I was just open and freed and I realized that no no no no because I've had relationships where my relationship will be like oh why are you smiling so much and I'm like no I'm just being the other girl that came I smile too at her why is this such a big deal but then I now realize that The guys roll with it and assume that you actually like them. That is why girls are normally advised to just carry your face. Just carry face. Give them an attitude. If you know that you're not interested, just give them an attitude or just just remove your eye because the moment that you look at them or give them some attention, they started to feel that. Ah, so I agree with you. When you're like when a guy is trying to talk to you, it's clearly because he feels, "Oh, you have such a cute face and those lips are so sexy. I can kiss it. How about I touch you? I touch your strategy or something like it's just you you guys only became best friends because you you were, you know, you just swept the whole thing from a romantic thing to just being guy. Yeah. But normally the guy, he doesn't just want to be your guy. Yeah. He wants it here. It's here. It's here. He wants it. So then, so then is a fact, so then Kelvin, it's a fact that even in your generation, guys and girls can't really just be friends. Minus me. Oh, this boy. Anyways, guys, please, I've had so much fun actually talking with you and getting to Yeah. Yeah. And getting to find out really how things are with you guys cuz I know what it's like for me. But then I needed to find out in your friendship and in your groups and in your So then the truth is it still is the same thing with both Gen Z's and millennials when we're speaking about friends when they owe you money. They also, you know, you have to often times get in a fight before you get your money back. And then everyone else in the group is trying to make you feel like you're the bad person for asking for your money. That's the same. Then also the fact that you know guys and girls can't just really be friends. I think that that's so crazy. Do you drink together? Do you guys get high together? Yes. Those type of things. Yes. His body is touch even his hand stretch like baby you're looking at it. Okay. It has been an incitive episode of just my POV where we've been talking about these two generations and what's going on. So then what it means is that it's facts that first of all guys and girls can't be friends in these two generations. I mean it's always complicated. The guy go want something and then the girl too she go like you know there's that one. Then there's also the ones where yeah when your friends are owing you money apparently it's the same across generations that you kind of need to get in a fight and then when you even start to sound somehow to demand for your money the other friends in the friends group will always come at you and make you feel like you're the bad person. But don't worry, you are not the bad person. Forget about all those people. Those people are not really your friends. All right, I talked about it on this episode. And then finally, you know that one where um you have some friends that are really really boring on social media and they just have you following them. They don't even they post anything. They're just like random like that. Please feel free to unfollow or mute them or whatever. Me, I'm saying that. I'm saying that because I mean as an adult, you should be doing things that make you happy. People don't usually do things because of how you feel. They do things based on how they feel. So if you're feeling uncomfortable or you're getting the ache about that about the tips to try just put in the effort, okay? Make sure when you're posting something that is something that you like to look at, like you like to watch, put in the effort, edit it, make the um your videos maybe fastpaced or do a voice over, make it more interesting. That way you can at least keep your friends or just don't demand that they follow you back because I mean it's hectic for me. I do a lot of work on my You're supposed to put your personality out there on social media and people who like what you put out, follow you. Follow you. If you don't put out anything on Instagram, then stay on iMessage, you know. Yeah. And WhatsApp have to and message me. You are their fan. Like they put out interesting content after you follow them. You don't put out anything. You don't necessarily have to be followed. You don't have to be unless you are fooled by love like me. And like you you you like to be deceiving yourself in that idea. But I'm sorry. I haven't unfollowed anyone yet. But you know, because I'm thinking about it, I'm like, look, I'm going to unfollow you. If I notice anybody, if I notice anybody on my IG that's not giving me or at least just present, I'm going to unfollow. Don't feel bad. It's not from a bad place. It's just cuz at least do me or something. I'm entertaining you. You to entertain me. All right. Um, also to watch this episode, make sure that you follow just my POV on IG and make sure to follow at the house chronicles on IG as well. The link is right there on their bio. You can also subscribe on YouTube, uh, The House Chronicles, and then you get to watch a variety of shows. We'll see you later. [Music]