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DodoBorne is a comedy Daggerheart actual play podcast where four friends dive into the brand-new tabletop roleplaying game from Darrington Press. Join Kapi, Crank, and Pistachio as they navigate a rich world of mystery, magic, and malfeasance!
Humor, heart, and nonsense guaranteed. Some assembly required.
Major deific relics, nine in total. They dot this land and they are forces of great change. You yourselves have come into contact with these so you know very well what I am speaking of. Our goal is to find these and contain them. Mortalkind is not meant to wield these and it puts everyone in the public at great risk when Mortalkind, untrained and without oath, touch, interact, use, even look upon these.
Isaac:There are a few that exist within the coffers of the church. We have them deep below on the sacred ground that lies at the center of our cathedral. But there are many that are still out there and unfortunately unaccounted for. Part of this branch is that there are individuals tasked very specifically with finding a specific relic. These journeys can take lifetimes.
Isaac:Most individuals who take this on ends in failure. However, you two have been identified not only due to your aptitudes, but also due to the personal experiences that you have had with such relics. For you, Balan, the Eben Scepter. And I'm curious, what was your interaction with the Eben Scepter, the relic of midnight?
Rowan:The Eben Scepter was at the core of a mob boss that kept the entirety of the larger city that it would be in under the thumb. It allowed people to disappear that you knew should have been there, but not just from like presence, but from people's recent memory too. It was discovered when Balan lost a sibling who he does not remember anymore, but still has proof of.
Isaac:Bolan, as you know, the peacekeepers of Regulus and the Church of Hilltop had a combined effort to stop that individual who wielded it. And you also know that in the fracas, the Eben Scepter was lost. We currently do not know where it is or who has it. Sagan.
Joe:Priestess.
Isaac:Your experience with the ashen bow is unique because although you have experienced the power of it, thankfully to all nine gods, we were able to contain it. However, as you know, you've been marked by it. And I'm curious, what was the experience that marked you by the ashen bow?
Joe:It was in my hometown and there was an attack on our people and we were making good headway until that bow showed up and then he shot me down in the shoulder.
Isaac:And I know the rest of that story is painful for you to tell. But as you know, once you are marked by very rare individuals who can withstand such a thing. Some call them Newman. Others call them soul marks. But a bit of that divinity was imbued within you.
Isaac:Once you were struck by that, you woke up to a field of dead, struck by a barrage of arrows similar to what struck you. And that is the power of the mark. You wield a fraction of it, and yet even a fraction, when untamed, can deal an enormous amount of tragedy. Unfortunately for you, this will be something that you will have to live with, and it's something that you will have to learn to control to your best ability. But it's also an important reason that even though through your experience we were able to contain the relic, you better than most understand the danger that these present.
Isaac:I do, priestess. And thus, it is with great honor that I welcome you two as seekers of the Novenary Inquisition.
Joe:We are honored, priestess.
Isaac:Balan, seeker of midnight. Zagan, seeker of bone. Now follow me. You will speak your oaths to the god with which you are marked, words that you should hold close to you, an oath that will protect you from the pull of these relics. Only speak these words to those who you believe have potential or are down a path that is bound to be the same fate as yours.
Joe:Is there a shadow being cast by this obelisk?
Isaac:There is and it is right next to the black clad individuals. Oh my God.
Rowan:Pistachio goes, shit. Cappy, fuck. He he shadow stepped in. We have to go in there now. Everybody throw the door.
Joe:And as I shadow step, I'm gonna mark a stress to shadow step ideally right next to it. And as soon as he realizes it, he's gonna be like, oh. And he's gonna turn around really quick and try to pull that sword out of the stone.
Rowan:No. Can we try and burst through around the same time?
Isaac:A couple things happen around the same time. Pistachio, you you're in the hallway and you see father Charles and Hazel and Cerulean at the front kicking the door open. Cappy, as you're standing there, you reach for the blade and in a flash, there is a sword at your neck. Before you can even get there. And you hear a voice say, well, hey there.
Isaac:What's this? A little raccoon coming out of the trash with its grabby little hands trying to take something that doesn't belong to him? And you see that a Qatari woman is currently holding this sword neatly against your neck. She is dressed in all black in a kind of, Lin from Fire Emblem type getup and a smile on her face that seems sinister. You hear a loud bang as the front doors burst open in response to Pistachio screaming, and everything stops for a moment.
Isaac:Pistachio, you're just behind them. You see Major Balthazar sees all this. Come on. Really? Really, Cappy?
Joe:Oh, hey, Major. Did you know that not Major isn't your first name?
Isaac:It's Walter.
Joe:That's that's a name. I would have gone with Major. We have this weird thing here
Isaac:in town.
Joe:It's like Mayor Raisins and I thought your name was Major. Anyways, I talk a lot when I'm nervous.
Isaac:How did you find us? What the hells is this?
Joe:Yeah. No. I'm not I don't think I'm stoked about it either. You kinda killed this this this person I really like's dad. I I don't know.
Joe:That was wild. But I No one will miss rich Apple people. No. I'm not really saying they would. I well, some people will.
Joe:I just I thought that I don't even need to again, I talk a lot when I'm nervous. Really, you could stop me at any point. Did you have like a like a monologue or something you wanted to do or
Isaac:I don't She pulls out a small pistol and Oh. Says, if you had just stayed at home, none of this would have happened. I had the thought that I should have sent some of my boys to end you three. I didn't realize just how much of a fucking problem you would become.
Rowan:At that point, Pistachio has like walked up through the door or an assessed and like goes, well, we can always be a bigger problem. And like beast forms into a dodo pangolin, which rolls out into
Joe:A what?
Rowan:A dodo pangolin. So if you have What are
Isaac:you what? A pangolin?
Joe:Pangolin? Are you so you're not saying penguin?
Rowan:No. A pangolin.
Joe:Pango That's
Isaac:how Benedict Cumberbatch would say penguin.
Rowan:No. It's a giant it's a giant like you've you've seen a little Shy. They're like an armadillo thingy with armored skin, but like have little cute little hands, but it's giant. Okay. It's a giant I can't wait
Joe:the dodo born Pangolin. Animal book. Yeah.
Isaac:A color we're getting into children's coloring books.
Rowan:Yes. Yes. Which is it essentially looks like a giant pangolin, but a dodo head.
Joe:Mhmm.
Rowan:And they have rolled Naturally. Naturally. Right? And done that. Be his shield if needed.
Joe:Pistachio, I have a I have a sword to my neck.
Rowan:Yeah. You're about to have a bullet in your throat.
Isaac:As this pangolin happens, Cappy, you feel the attention on the sword move away from you as you hear, well, well, well. And you see that this Qatari woman next to you just kinda looks you for a second and says, don't touch my sword. And she starts to stride away from you. You turn into a pangolin. Yes.
Isaac:As you do so, and as this woman walks away from you, Cappy, you hear Major yell, start it up. And as he points his gun, welcome to the finale of season two. Here's how this is going to work. The things that you two notice right away. First and foremost, Ingeborg looks at the two of you in the split most of a second and you recognize that she is going to guard the rear as you can hear footsteps from beyond the hall back in the staircase that you originally came from.
Isaac:It looks like that Ingeborg is going to stop reinforcements on coming as best that she can. You also see that father Charles is moving the same way away from you as this Qatari woman is. Clearly, he has locked on to her, but it looks in this moment that these two individuals are about to go at it. You also see Crank has walked in and has seen the individuals in the corner. You see that he raises his hands and says, Pleiades, incredible to see you again.
Isaac:You see that Pleiades looks over. And Rowan, would you like to give me just a quick description of what Pleiades looks like?
Rowan:Yeah. So Pleiades is a purple Galappa with a third eye on the middle of their forehead in a bright white lab coat.
Isaac:And you see recognition. He says, Adrian, it worked? And Crank begins to walk over and talk to Pleiades. Cerulean behind him looking so confused. Now, here's how this is gonna work.
Isaac:Those things all happened simultaneously right at the same time as all the rest of this whatever is happening as the mechanical things in front of you begin to Hey, it's me, Isaac Allen Burns. Oh. Here to tell you about this warehouse battle environment. First and foremost, let's determine how bad this is. Rowan or Joe, one of you roll a d 10 for me.
Rowan:I'll do it. It's a nine.
Isaac:A nine. Very good. We have started a countdown of nine. You have some allies with you right now, and I need you to make a few decisions. You see that father Charles and this Qatari woman are about to fight each other.
Isaac:Hazel seems torn between helping father Charles or engaging with what you're engaging with, Pistachio. At the same time, Ingeborg behind you is facing down a couple of Luvenhurst goons and peacekeepers who have caught up to the action coming down the stairs. She can likely handle them, but there's a lot of them and a few might slip through. Callie is looking back between Ingeborg and all of you, a little torn. Cerulean is watching Crank walk up to these enemies seemingly at ease, and then sees the person tied up at the obelisk.
Isaac:You hear them yell, Clover. Shit. Essentially, father Charles is going to be dueling this Qatari woman, and Hazel can help him survive this encounter. On the other side, Ingeborg is going to be attempting to wey le reinforcements. Callie can help her do so successfully.
Isaac:Perhaps story beats can change and perhaps in the narrative that will change, but whatever decision you make basically right up front is where they are most likely going to stay. And the thing is, as it stands right now, order for them to join you, I'm going to ask you to make presence roles. Now in my mind, paying attention to the ways that you have treated these individuals, the way that they think of you. I'm trying to determine what you see.
Joe:You son of a bitch.
Rowan:You piece of shit.
Isaac:And and and this is a conversation between us right now. Yeah. So Rowan, let's talk about Hazel real fast. So I would say Hazel has been a little excited about her time with father Charles. And I would say that Pistachio has been a little bit distant with their family.
Rowan:Mhmm. Yep.
Isaac:This is a very exciting moment for Hazel. However, in the discussion with Wally, you can feel a little bit of familial connection there, I would say. Mhmm. But you've spent some time apart. And so in this moment, I'm going to have you roll a presence check.
Isaac:I'm gonna say the DC for this is going to be a 15.
Rowan:Alright. Well, I'm gonna add Family's buff farm. No. I'm not. I'm not gonna add anything to this for now because I have only one hope, and I wanna save it for later.
Isaac:And you can choose not to roll if you want to allow Hazel to simply fight with father Charles.
Rowan:I think I think Pistachio is torn as well between wanting to let Hazel do this for herself because I think this whole time, Pistachio has been, like, wary about the fact that she hasn't had a chance to choose and the conversation that we ally has has also been weighing on them. I think this president's role is not necessarily for Pistachio to convince Hazel. I think this president's role is whether or not Pistachio is going to ask themselves to ask Hazel.
Isaac:And I love that.
Rowan:So
Isaac:What's 15.
Rowan:That is a crit.
Isaac:Oh. What do you say to Hazel that pushes her to help you?
Rowan:Hazel, you've been training under father Charles. He may have told you some stuff about this, this artifacts that we might not know. Your knowledge is gonna be completely needed for us to figure this shit out. Can you help us, please? I need your help.
Isaac:Hazel looks at father Charles. She, for a moment, is trying to decide where to go. This is her first battle.
Rowan:Mhmm.
Isaac:And you see father Charles motions to her and, like, points towards you. Without taking his eyes off of the Qatari woman, Hazel will fight with you. So Hazel is an ally in this. She will support you. She is what I would say is a physical support ally.
Isaac:So she is able to heal you and she is able to increase some of the damage that you can deal. Callie is looking back and forth between Ingeborg and you. Lots been happening with Callie recently. She just got broken up with even though she was planning on breaking up with her, and that stings a little bit. She definitely does have some history with Ingeborg and would likely in the future say that Ingeborg was likely the best partner that she ever had.
Joe:Mhmm.
Isaac:But as it stands right now, she has history with you as well and is looking at you. I think in my opinion, especially because in the last few hours, you have definitely spent a little more time with her than you have with the others.
Joe:Mhmm.
Isaac:And that definitely means something. I think the presence check for this is going to be a 13 to get her to help you.
Joe:Okay. I think Cappy will look at Callie and they make eye contact and I think probably the only person that would ever be able to clock it would be Pistachio, but I think you could see that Cappy is heartbroken and points and just and just gives her a nod to go help Ingeborg.
Isaac:She looks at Joe, turns to go help Ingeborg.
Joe:Rowan looks stressed.
Rowan:Rowan is stressed.
Joe:To set the scene I saw Rowan doing the thousand mile stare for
Rowan:There's so much going on.
Isaac:To set the scene, Pleiades, this purple Galappa in the corner, has wave their hands in a magical manner and you see that bright blue lights are coming from these these wires that are along that circle on the ground. The weight that you feel densifies. You swear you notice at the corner of this circle, it's like bubbling blackness. Almost like oil coming out of the ground. Just at the just at the sides.
Isaac:Just at the edge. Major Balthazar is pointing. An alarm is going off. And you see a couple of these strange, what you would describe as almost sentries kind of appear. See, one of them floats oddly enough.
Isaac:It looks like a circle with an eye looking out. You see another one is this mechanical looking being. Its joints glow blue and it's made of this thick metallic armor. And, both of those things float next to Major Balthazar. Major Balthazar has a gun pointed at Pistachio.
Isaac:Is He looking He looked a little confused by the Qatari woman walking that way. Yuri, get back here. Stop that one. And, this individual named Yuri fully ignores him. So, I'm just gonna start off by spending a fear.
Rowan:How many fear do you have, Isaac?
Isaac:I have so much fear.
Rowan:Oh, God.
Isaac:Currently have 11 fear. To start off with, let's talk about the central crux of this as the weapon calls. Our countdown has begun. I am spending a fear. The countdown decreases to eight.
Isaac:I'm gonna roll a quick dice. Cathy, can I have a presence reaction roll from you?
Joe:No. Sure. Presence is plus two.
Rowan:Remember this is not with fear or hope, right? Because reaction.
Isaac:Reaction roll. So hope and fear don't matter here.
Joe:22. Nice.
Isaac:Cappy, there is a calling in the back of your mind. You swear as you look, you can just see the staff just on the side of the strange black obelisk and it calls to you. It wants you to come to it. You resist it and apparently, the staff doesn't like rejection. A pulse rings out in the entirety of the room.
Isaac:Everybody in the room is going to take one direct damage. Hey, everybody. It's me, your GM Isaac Allen, first popping in. Are we having such a great time? Just to let you know that direct damage is damage that cannot be decreased by armor.
Joe:Okay. Up to three HP out of six.
Rowan:I'm up to well, I healed myself so I am now at one HP out of six. K. So we're good. And only one stress because thank you crit.
Isaac:I'm spending a fear. I spent a fear to activate that. Now, I'm spending a fear to spotlight Major Balthasar. Major Balthasar is a bit of a leader and right at the start, he is going to rally his people. This automaton, you could say, the thing with glowing blue joints, lumbers forward towards you, Pistachio, in your pangolin form and swipes at you.
Isaac:Does a two hit you? No. Wait. Wait. Wait.
Isaac:No. Oh, shoot. You then notice as the floating orb from its eye is a beam that seems to cover major Balthazar. And finally, he points his gun and shoots you, Pangolin boy.
Rowan:That's okay. That's fine.
Isaac:Does an 11 hit you?
Rowan:It does. I think Pistachio goes into like a little ball, which you I use armored shell that gives me resistance to physical damage.
Isaac:Wow. Okay. Dang. That would normally be a 23 physical damage to you, but now instead is only 11.
Rowan:11. Cool. While I'm in my shell, physical damage is reduced by a number equal to my armor score after applying resistance. So that is 11 minus four, which is then seven. So that's only minor damage.
Rowan:Let's go Pangolin.
Isaac:Nice.
Rowan:Armored sentry. Let's go.
Isaac:You hear the conversation between Crank, question mark, and Pleiades. You hear Crank say, yeah, plan worked exactly as I had thought. Though, unfortunately, Costello was right that my magic grows much like when I was first born. So, I essentially have the same amount of power as I did when I was 12. Craig, what are you doing?
Isaac:I'm having a conversation right now with an old friend.
Rowan:Craig, what a So
Isaac:good to see.
Rowan:You're in a battle.
Isaac:Hang on, please. I'm not Crank. Was that not clear? Your friend's not here anymore. Alright?
Isaac:And I know you've become attached to this, but this is a vessel. My name is Adrian Toulouse. Pleasure to meet you. Now, I'm having a conversation You're cranky. Master.
Isaac:We Master is a strong word. Alright? I never say master. I liked mentor. Liked parent maybe.
Rowan:Is Craig? Where? Where is he?
Isaac:Craig isn't here anymore. So anyways, where are you at now Pleiadios if you're still in the division of knowledge and there can their conversation continues. Alright. Spotlight to y'all.
Joe:Okay. On Cappy. Pistachio, we'll worry about Crank later.
Rowan:We don't have time for this now, you're right. We don't have time.
Joe:Okay. And then Cappy is going to finally pull out his weapon.
Isaac:Uh-oh. Yeah. What's the weapon?
Joe:The weapon that Dandelio O'Toole
Isaac:That's right. His real name. Are
Joe:that he helped reconfigure the halberd for Cappy. Oh. And Cappy had it reconfigured into into a war scythe.
Isaac:Describe this war scythe for
Joe:me. So first off, it's in two parts which is why he didn't, you know, you couldn't really see it and it was at his sides on a belt and he kind of pulls it out and it like connects in the middle with a golden piece that has that emblem on it that has the emblem of the Scarlet Fever on it and it connects it. You hear it click in and he's going to attack one of those floating things.
Isaac:Okay. You're going for the floating one. Nice. Okay. Do it up.
Isaac:Make the attack. Okay. Look at that. Yeller paying attention. Do
Joe:it up. Crit. Oh. Yes. Crit elevens.
Rowan:Crit elevens. Okay. Crit on him.
Isaac:Roll damage.
Joe:Sure. So Remember,
Isaac:oh, it's me Isaac Allen Burns. Remember, when you roll, you're gonna take the maximum possible damage and then roll on top of it.
Joe:Okay. So that's d eight plus five which is two d eight.
Isaac:Right. Because my proficiency is two.
Joe:Hell yeah. So that is a four plus one, so that's five. A four and a one, so five plus five which is 10, plus one, which is 11. On top of 13, which is 16 because
Rowan:because two b eight plus five.
Joe:16 plus
Rowan:five plus 11. Is 21 plus we can do this. We can do this. 21 plus 11 is 32. 32 damage.
Joe:32 damage.
Rowan:There we go. We can do math. Isaac is so disappointed in us.
Isaac:32 exactly?
Joe:32 exactly. 31.
Rowan:Yeah. I'm sure. Fucked. I think that was the severe damage No.
Isaac:That was even worse. That was double the severe damage.
Rowan:Yes. Kill him.
Isaac:How do you so describe how you destroy this floating orb in a very vicious way.
Joe:Yeah. So I just take my war scythe and I think I just jam it directly into one of the slits with the blue glowing and I just when I go to pull it out, it just breaks it into a thousand pieces.
Isaac:Damn. Wow. Okay. That's fantastic. Nice.
Isaac:You see that Major Balthazar spins around and says, what? How'd you destroy that so quickly?
Rowan:Pistachio running at this now a ball form goes, Hazel, you want to chuck me?
Isaac:Hell yeah, I do. Hazel says.
Rowan:Fuck yeah. We're gonna use cannonball. So I'm gonna mark a stress to allow an ally to throw or launch you as an at an adversary. To do so, the ally makes an attack roll using agility or strength against a target within close range. Fuck yeah, Hazel.
Rowan:Fuck yeah, Hazel. That is a 25 whithole.
Isaac:Dang. What the okay.
Rowan:Let's go, Hazel.
Isaac:Let's go. Roll roll damage. My god.
Joe:Isaac, you remember season one finale. Right?
Isaac:I do. I mean, I'm learning. I'm I'm relearning it. Y'all are rolling so well.
Rowan:That is an eight plus two ten physical damage. What's it's the throwers plus the throwers proficiency. Two. Two. Okay.
Rowan:You can then spend a hope, which I will do to target an additional adversary within very close range of the first. So if I was planning on aiming towards one of the orbs, I wanna bonk him with the other one.
Isaac:Dang. Yeah. Do it.
Rowan:K. The second target takes half the damage dealt to the first one. There we go. So he takes five damage. Bonk.
Isaac:Nice. Yeah. That second orb that's floating by him gets hit, and you see that Major Balthasar also gets hit and yells, ah. He's upset about it.
Rowan:Fantastic. And now there's a pangolin ball right by his feet.
Isaac:Oh my god. And the spotlight is still with you. You have sort of brushed right in at Major Balthazar and he is kind of on a back foot at this point. What else would you like to do?
Joe:I'd like to clock the opposite side of the vent and see if I see anything.
Isaac:Yeah. As you look at it, go ahead. I'm gonna say make an instinct roll for me.
Joe:Instinct is plus zero.
Rowan:Did you cut again? Yes.
Isaac:The Yes. Spirit of Annie lives on. You mirror dice. What the oh my god. So
Rowan:you look Clear clear get yourself a hope and clear a stress.
Joe:Okay. Thank you.
Rowan:You're welcome.
Joe:I'm down to no stress and five of six hope.
Rowan:Hell yeah.
Isaac:You see that the vent has been slightly askewed. It looks like three of the bolts have been removed and one is still there, but allowing what looks like like the vent to be pushed up a little bit and you simply see a long tube that's kind of stuck through it. And on that crit, it's a muzzle of a gun. Oh, gosh. Mhmm.
Isaac:It is not pointed yet at anyone. It seems to be pointed at the black obelisk, but you think that someone is looking through it and observing and waiting for the right time. Cool. Because I was with hope spotlight is still on you. So you just take a moment to clock that, you notice it, and it's back to y'all.
Rowan:Alright. The pangolin opens up from the little ball and goes, and it's showtime. And there's a swarm of fireflies that come out of the roll. So I make a spell class roll against any close enemies on X6 S. Spend a hope to have the fireflies swarm them doing damage.
Rowan:So on all targets, I succeeded against. So here we go. I'm targeting those two again. Our first fear, if you will. Can I add a taste for blood onto this?
Isaac:Sure.
Rowan:Okay. This is with fear. It is going to be 13 with fear.
Isaac:13 will miss.
Rowan:Both of them?
Isaac:13 will miss both of them.
Rowan:Yes.
Isaac:As you yell, showtime, and you go in for it, the severity of the situation thickens as fights begin in earnest. First and foremost, Joe, you and me buddy, can you hand me your fear dice?
Joe:Yeah. I guess.
Rowan:Oh, no. Isaac is literally leaning across the table.
Joe:I just don't remember which one of these is my fear one, I guess.
Isaac:What? You've been rolling, you don't know which one's the fear one?
Joe:No. Know my vibes.
Isaac:I'm just kidding.
Joe:It's the one with the jacket has hope.
Isaac:Okay. Alright.
Rowan:He knows my vibes. That's an apple.
Joe:Eight. You gotta say 12 in the mic though.
Isaac:I rolled a 12. Eight. Callie's helping her. Mhmm. Go ahead and roll a d six.
Rowan:Yes.
Isaac:And you rolled an
Rowan:eight? Yes.
Joe:Yeah. If you
Isaac:roll a four or higher. I rolled a two. Dang. Not enough. That is a success for me.
Isaac:No. That is a failure for Ingeborg. Can you go ahead and roll me a d four, please?
Rowan:Yeah. I'm just waiting with my fear dice and d.
Joe:It's a one. Oh. God. Thank
Isaac:Yes. One gets through. See, this one is a goon, one of Luvenhurst's goons. Looks like a dock worker, you see the markings on their neck. I spent another fear.
Isaac:You. This is great. Good.
Rowan:I just had it ready.
Isaac:I'm not kidding. I rolled another 12.
Rowan:So did I.
Isaac:Oh. High. Reroll. This time I rolled a three.
Rowan:I rolled a seven. Let's go So father
Isaac:pretty immediately, the fight takes off. They are moving very quickly. You hear the clang of metal on metal and you realize that father Charles' crossbow that he has, there is a blade that has come out the side of it that seems to glow with this kind of divine energy. And you hear a somewhat mirthful voice come out of Yuri. He says, I've been waiting to tussle with a seeker for a while.
Isaac:This is the best day possible. Now it is, I'm gonna spend a fear. I'm spending a fear. Pistachio, can I get a presence reaction roll from you as the weapon calls?
Rowan:15.
Isaac:15. That succeeds, Which means, once again pistachio, and you're close to it. You feel the call of this thing. But as you reject it, it lashes out in anger and everyone in the room is going to take one direct damage. You hear Hazel grunt in pain.
Rowan:Hazel, no.
Joe:I'm at four out of six HP.
Rowan:I'm at three out of six.
Joe:I only have two left. Shit.
Isaac:Damn, that's crazy.
Rowan:Can we tell in this moment the call the weapon is the thing that is causing the pain?
Isaac:Oh, yeah. You know that implicitly. You know that this weapon is calling out for people. You hear a bit of muffled screaming from the individual that's tied up in the chair. And Major Balthazar, who's very upset by this, I'm gonna activate him.
Isaac:And he has a little bit of leadership on his side. So first, the lumbering clank that had just went for you, Pistachio. Mhmm. You see that it turns to look at you attacking Major Balthazar. Because you missed, it is going to make a strategic decision and turn to the individual who threw you at it and is going to attack Hazel.
Rowan:Goddamn it.
Isaac:Unfortunately, rolled exactly what it needed and you see that Hazel takes a wound. You, Pistachio, watch as this individual sends a enormous punch directly into Hazel's chest and you can hear the wind get knocked out of her. She still stands her ground and curses under her breath, but she took a nasty hit. Because he is a leader, get to activate I get to basically spotlight a bunch of different people kind of at the same time. So now the orb, the one remaining orb that is around his head is going to look towards you, Cappy.
Isaac:And, that was a 17 to hit you. Mhmm. I got so many dice, don't wanna do with them all. 14 magical damage to you. As that occurs, Cappy, you see this bolt of magic shoot towards you and you hear, Cappy, watch out.
Isaac:And a bit of a abjurative magic gets shot in front of you by Cerulean who reaches out a hand and sends some magic. Whatever threshold this is decreases by one.
Joe:It took me from severe to major which is still two. So can I still use my last armor slot to take that to minor?
Isaac:Yes, you can.
Rowan:Nice.
Joe:Okay. And now I'm only with one HP left. And I look at Cerulean and I'm like, thanks. Thanks Cerulean.
Rowan:Pistachio calls out Do you know any healing?
Isaac:Yeah. I Yeah. She is going to begin to move towards you, Cappy. Mhmm. And at the end of your next move, she's going to do something.
Isaac:But for now, you see that she moves away from this guy and moves up her crossbow trained on Major Balthazar. And now it's Major Balthazar's turn who is going to attack. Let's see if he can hit anybody this time. He looks at this big pangolin in front of him. Looks at you, the big pangolin, the dodo pangolin Mhmm.
Isaac:And says, you just don't understand. You small minded, small town hicks don't understand. He swings. 23. A seven physical damage.
Rowan:Uh-huh.
Isaac:As with his saber, he stabs into you.
Rowan:Armor slot for nothing.
Isaac:Nice. Clangs off of your pangolin scales. I turn the spotlight back to all of you.
Joe:Alright. I wanna use my scythe again. Yeah? Yeah. Do it up.
Joe:I'm gonna attack Major Balthus. I'll attack the last floating thing next to
Isaac:him. Sure.
Joe:Okay. Do it up.
Rowan:Did you crit again?
Joe:You can look at it.
Rowan:Oh my god.
Joe:I mean
Rowan:Oh my god. You crit again, Adam. What
Isaac:is it about these these finales and me trying so hard to make it tense? Yeah. Every one of each time rolls just a crit every single time.
Joe:That is a crit of nines.
Isaac:Daring a two nines on this in disbelief. You know, shout out shout out to Emma. Shout out
Joe:to Emma. These were a gift these were a gift these were gift dice.
Isaac:Emma, how could you do this to me?
Joe:And they are really working for me.
Isaac:Overall damage.
Joe:Oh, okay. Yeah. Don't mind if I do. 37 damage.
Isaac:Once again, this orb is destroyed. And you see this kind of shimmering field that was around Major Belsar goes away. And he says, you're destroying precious technology. We will need these in the war effort and you're destroying them like they're nothing. Oh, no.
Isaac:This is the great equalizer. That's why you adventurers don't understand.
Joe:Oh. Pistachio. What? This is the great equalizer. The thing from the papers.
Joe:We've read about that.
Rowan:The from the papers.
Joe:This guy thinks that he's important.
Rowan:Oh, well, we could show him about that. After all, we are Dodos. And then I think Pistachio drops out of the pangolin form and cashes casts Vicious and Tangle on this guy.
Isaac:Oh.
Rowan:And we're gonna hope to restrain him. Let's go. That's a 17 with hope.
Joe:Maybe Emma cares about me enough that she waited the dice.
Rowan:Yeah. Yeah. Alright. Does that hit?
Isaac:That will hit.
Rowan:Does it hit? Okay. First off, he is restrained. And second off, now he gets dealt some damage which is going to be the wimpy.
Isaac:As you entangle him as these vines wrap up his legs, you see that looks at you angrily and says, there is nothing that you two could say to me that will hurt me anymore than the embarrassment that my family has received ever since that god's damned war. And he's gonna use a reaction called for my family's honor now that he has reached perhaps what could be described as half of his health. And he is going to attack everyone within very close range of him, which includes pistachio.
Joe:That is a Was Hazel gonna help us, me?
Rowan:Yeah. Yeah.
Isaac:Yeah. 18 to hit you?
Rowan:That'll hit.
Isaac:There's a crit on you, Cathy. Oh. Yeah. He actually misses Hazel.
Rowan:God. Yeah. Wasn't Hazel supposed to kill Cathy?
Isaac:Yeah. Give me a second, people.
Rowan:Jesus. We're dying.
Isaac:I'm so impatient.
Joe:I'm getting scared.
Isaac:Let the moment sit. Let the tension sit, you little critsters.
Rowan:Gonna die, man.
Isaac:That is 10 physical damage to you, Pistachio. Okay. That is going to be 42 damage to you, Cappy.
Joe:Uh-huh. But
Isaac:as you're about to take this damage, Hazel who's running is gonna yell, no. And hop in front of it with her sort of like sigil of the nine out as if trying to heal you. Mhmm. She's going to take this blow and you feel some of her magic indwelt within her from this holy symbol comes out to you and is going to heal you for two HP. As Hazel collapses to
Rowan:the ground. No. Hazel. Hazel. No.
Rowan:No. No. No. No. No.
Isaac:No. He got me. Fuck. Shit. She's still alive but very hurt.
Rowan:She's so good. Hazel, stay down.
Isaac:It is still your go. It is now your turn. That was a quick spotlight. Actually, I'm gonna spend a few. Countdown's down to six, and I need Capi.
Joe:Mhmm.
Isaac:Make a presence reaction roll for me.
Joe:17.
Isaac:Cool. It lashes out in anger. Everyone takes a direct damage. Okay.
Rowan:I'm at five out of six.
Isaac:You see Cerulean in the back, cremices, his nose beginning to bleed. You see that the goon that was in the back that just entered into the room, you see his eyes begin to bleed and he collapses to the ground. You see that this shambling piece of armor that was just behind you kind of crushes in on itself and falls over as this is hurting everyone in the room. You hear in the corner of the room, Pleiades, that really hurts. You didn't think to put up any kind of protective shielding around this so that you could see this?
Isaac:You hear Pleiades respond, well, that's the thing about Edict is that it's it's just that we don't really know too much about it after all. I'm not actually the one who works specifically with Edict, but you know, some of the people in a different department. What organization are you working for? Also, this thing looking for an Imolate or what is going on? And you see Pleiadian says, well, can't exactly tell you what it is, but we're always hiring good talent and yes, this sort of co opted its search for an Imolet right now to use its energy in a sort of crossing of its usual magical connotations with the Vermillion saber over there.
Isaac:Thankfully, most recent Imolet, we have some of his family's blood spilled on our sort of artificial sacred ground here and so it's going to strengthen it up. But it's now back to all of you.
Joe:Alright. I want to end Major Balthazar.
Isaac:Okay.
Joe:So I'm gonna attack.
Isaac:You're attack?
Joe:Which is my war scythe. He's restrained. He's restrained.
Isaac:Which means he can't
Joe:move. Awesome.
Rowan:Doesn't that give him advantage too?
Isaac:So restrained just means he can't move. You might be thinking of the vulnerable condition which hello. It's me, your best friend Isaac Allen Burns here to tell you about some of the conditions. While the book does not lay out a ton of conditions, it does lay out a few. One of which being restrained, which means that you cannot move until you do something about your restrained condition.
Isaac:It also gives the vulnerable condition, where upon anything the attacks made against you have advantage. Sometimes these conditions are temporary, which means that you can end them with a spotlight, frying me your GM. Okay.
Joe:19 with fear.
Isaac:That hits.
Joe:Thank you.
Rowan:Nice. Nice. Nice. Nice. Nice.
Rowan:Okay.
Joe:15.
Isaac:Yeah. That hits him. He don't like it.
Joe:Yeah. He just like tears it right like from shoulder to side.
Isaac:You see, he grabs his shoulders and he looks at you and says, I was meant to die at war. A beautiful war that would win back our land.
Joe:Romanticizing death. That's cool.
Rowan:No, it's not. Pistachio says, popping a quick health potion.
Isaac:Well, you can do it on your turn, but it's not your turn now because I need because we roll with fear. Joe. Yes? Go ahead and give me a roll off. First of all, throw me your fear dice.
Rowan:Okay. Okay. No need to throw it.
Joe:Okay. Ray. One, two, three. Roll. I rolled a 10.
Isaac:I rolled a nine.
Joe:That's right.
Rowan:Let's go.
Isaac:That is a success.
Rowan:Plus.
Isaac:Alright. And Roland, thank you so much. This is for father Charles. It's Yuri.
Rowan:10.
Isaac:That is an eight for me.
Rowan:Woah. Go father Charles.
Isaac:Father Charles, continuing to get the Go Cali.
Joe:Wait. Mine was for Cali.
Rowan:Right? Yep. Yours has Cali.
Isaac:Yours was for Ingeborg and Cali. Go Cali. You see father Charles is actually like getting the upper hand on Yuri. Mhmm. And you see Yuri looks ecstatic.
Isaac:She looks so excited.
Joe:Father Charles is using his crossbow?
Isaac:He's using his cross. You see that this fight is kinda coming back and forth near an immediate melee combat, and then they come back. He fires a couple arrows. They're back with it. This blade shining very brightly with this weird gray light.
Isaac:She says, sorry, the third couldn't be here. I think he has personal ties to this. And now, since I'm spending fear
Joe:Where are we at, countdown wise?
Isaac:Five. Okay.
Rowan:Okay.
Isaac:Still got time.
Rowan:Alright.
Isaac:Pistachio, it's your turn now to give me a presence reaction roll.
Rowan:Oh, fuck. Damn. 20 with hope.
Isaac:Pistachio, a 20?
Rowan:20.
Isaac:I will say you can choose to fail if you would like.
Rowan:I think Pistachio is realizing that because you had said that it is specifically calling out to people and we know that's the reason that it's hot having a reaction. Pistachio is low on health, is noticing it's hurting everybody and will choose in this moment, if this is the case, to fail.
Isaac:You fail. You're gonna take one stress and as you're looking at this, maybe you have this staff all wrong. People just aren't using it correctly. But this is something that can help you in this situation. The thing that you want most, what is the thing that Pistachio wants most right now?
Rowan:To get out this situation with everybody mostly alive to save everyone.
Isaac:And something you would know Pistachio is that this thing is causing all this pain to everybody. And if you just removed it from the situation, it would stop Mhmm. This whole thing. Maybe there are other things in this room that could be changed or stopped or interacted with to stop this from happening, but the easiest thing is probably gonna be this staff.
Rowan:That is what Pistachio was thinking anyway. Didn't need to force me to do that.
Isaac:I didn't force you to do anything. I'm just telling you the facts as Pistachio would understand them right now.
Rowan:Pistachio is gonna look at Cappy and get a wild look in their eye and start walking towards
Joe:Kid. The staff. Kid.
Isaac:As you step onto the blue circle. Mhmm.
Rowan:Again, popping the self potion.
Isaac:You pop the self potion, you move towards the blue circle.
Rowan:Mhmm.
Isaac:You step into the circle. This blue circle. Rich Apple people's body is on the other side of you on this circle. Blue sparks emanating up from his blood which almost used to be like absorbed into these strange wires. And as you step in time seems to slow down.
Isaac:Almost stops. You're standing on the edge of this blue circle, the staff pulsing. Well, well, well. What do we have here?
Rowan:Is that
Isaac:Little goat hands reaching out to little goat hands to try and Hey, touch the it's a podcast. Wow. What an episode that was, gang. Oh my goodness. What a wonderful penultimate episode.
Isaac:That's right, everybody. This next episode is gonna be the finale of season two. Whoo. Clap, clap, clap. What a journey we've been on.
Isaac:What a wonderful path it's been. And here to sign us off is a shout out to some of our biggest supporters. We love and appreciate every single one of you so much. Our bag of gold tier. Starting with Condor Blue, shout out.
Isaac:World of Gariva, BDS at Dorkmaster, Cole Lecago, Darcy r, Emma, Jacob r Hedwin, Joshius seven zero eight, assistant to the CEO, Kurt Wilde. Here I have some stage directions. Isaac says something nice about Zorak. You know Zorak? Not a lot of people have the last letter of the alphabet starting their name, but you do.
Isaac:And I think that that says that says a lot. Always there. Shout out to Zorak on the Discord. A fun person. We've actually played in a game together.
Isaac:That's right. He played in one of my games. A real fun guy. Not a mushroom, but a fun guy. Hey.
Isaac:Pop pop pop pop. I'm shooting finger guns. Maria Maria w. Nicholas w. Not related.
Isaac:Severed Ronin. Muscles dynamite. Explosion. Fatty Bright. Dirty bird, tabletop optimist, minor thoughts, Max l.
Isaac:Thank you all so much. We so appreciate y'all support, and I hope you all have a good day or a good night if you're listening to this as you're falling asleep, or a good weekend if it's Friday, or a happy birthday if it's your birthday, or a happy Valentine's Day if you're listening to this a year from now. Okay. Anyways, bye.