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Chasta and John compare parenting to being on a stage and discuss three external pressures they’re navigating: education, theme parks, and birthday parties. They describe the stressful, bureaucratic process of trying to petition for different kindergarten options in Wake County, contrasting it with the community feel of Chasta’s East Tennessee upbringing and emphasizing advocacy, authenticity, and resisting template-driven conformity. They share theme park stories—from missing mirrors and broken rides to the scramble to get Epic Universe tickets—and argue parents don’t need a “perfect” planned experience, just the willingness to go make memories. Finally, they unpack modern birthday party culture and explain how they balance expectations by letting their son share his “vision,” focusing on spirit, creativity, and being present because time is the ultimate resource.
00:00 Welcome to the Stage
00:59 Parenting External Pressures
02:10 Three Hot Topics Ahead
03:16 Kindergarten Anxiety Spiral
04:08 Navigating Wake County Options
05:51 Petitioning the School System
08:33 Bureaucracy vs Real Teachers
11:45 Theme Park Personalities
13:43 Orlando Trip and No Mirrors
16:37 Epic Universe Ticket Scramble
19:25 Theme Park Reality Check
19:59 Analog Lines Over Fast Pass
22:19 Parenting Pressure Release
23:41 Travel Anyway With Kids
24:55 Trust Your Gut
27:10 Birthday Party Culture
29:00 Designing His Party Vision
32:12 Curated Kits Versus Chaos
33:41 Be Present Be Seen
36:24 Family Stories And Gratitude
38:38 Closing Encouragement And Next Topics
Creators and Guests
What is Nobody Listens to Chasta?
What happens when someone says the things everyone else is thinking—but nobody is willing to say out loud?
Nobody Listens to Chasta is a counterculture podcast hosted by entrepreneur, speaker, and author Chasta Hamilton. With humor, candor, and unapologetic honesty, Chasta tackles the uncomfortable topics shaping modern life—from youth sports trophies and toxic achievement culture to entrepreneurship, parenting, grief, addiction, and the pressure to conform.
Drawing from her experience building Stage Door Dance Productions, founding Girls Geared for Greatness, and writing books like Trash the Trophies and Handle the Horrible, Chasta challenges systems that no longer serve us and explores better ways to live, lead, and raise the next generation.
Expect bold conversations, unconventional perspectives, and thoughtful debate designed to inspire healthier, happier, and more intentional lives.
If you've ever questioned the status quo…
you might be someone who actually listens to Chasta.
02 - Nobody Listens to Chasta
===
John: [00:00:00] the number one thing I hear from people is you have no idea how fast the time goes. Mm-hmm. And you can hear that a million times. And it's still true and it's still faster than you think. And so I think for me, the number one thing about parenting is just being present.
And I feel like sometimes I can forget that and I. It does not actually cost any money just to be present in listening to your child.
Chasta: This is nobody listens to Chasta, and I am [00:01:00] Chasta. I am so excited to be here today to talk to you about this show of life that I'm on, right?
Didn't William Shakespeare say that, um, the world is a stage?
John: I love that you think I would know what William Shakespeare said. So, yes.
Chasta: Yes. Well, I do believe it was him, and I do believe he said the world is our stage and we are currently on a very big stage and journey together. Now. We've been on a lot of stages together.
But this, I
John: wanna say that's our whole history of
Chasta: stages. It's our whole history. But this stage, the stage of parenting is a journey unlike any other, right? It's, it's the best, it's the craziest, it's the wildest. And I wanna talk about the production of parenting. Now I could have brought a parenting expert on here.
Right. But you didn't, we're kind of grassroots. Right? We're we're a little, um, scrappy and figuring it out together. And I bet there are a lot of people out there that are doing the same, but there are times when it's just like, whoa. Do you ever feel that?
John: No. I think it's super easy and it's always [00:02:00] going great.
I pat Sebastian on the head and I say, I love you buddy. Everything is perfect. That's, yeah. No,
Chasta: but sometimes it is. It is. But sometimes it is. But what I wanna talk about today are the, the things on the outside that are a little jolting.
John: Oh, the thing, the external, the
Chasta: external
John: forces.
Chasta: Gotcha.
John: Yes.
Chasta: The external forces expectations.
And I've picked three,
John: picked three good ones.
Chasta: I've picked three good ones that I think may relate to people out there that are hopefully listening. Nobody listens, but maybe if you, nobody
John: listens to Chad
Chasta: stuff. Yeah. If you feel this in your parenting journey, please listen. And so the first is gonna be education.
John: Oh boy. Starting hot.
Chasta: Starting hot. And I mean, we're just in pre-K and kindergarten, but it is, you know, you'd think we were an ideally leagues. There are people
John: laughing at us right now that have been through the whole college, but, but guess what? Kindergarten's, no joke these days.
Chasta: Yeah, and I wanna get to that, but I wanna tell them all three that I wanted them to know what's coming.
So that's gonna be the first one. And then we're gonna go to [00:03:00] theme parks. We all do them right? We all schlep through the lines and yes. So. And then the third is going to be birthday parties.
John: Oh no, not the birthday parties.
Chasta: Yeah. Did it all start with MTV, my super sweet 16 and somehow there's just been like a trickle down effect or something.
John: Do kids know, first of all, mtv
Chasta: second, no, MTS gone. Isn't MTV gone? Yeah.
John: So I don't know if they're to blame. I'm not. I'm not sure if you showed. I guess if you did so the parents,
Chasta: but those are the parents of the children now. Oh. We were conditioned on my super sweet 16.
John: So we have to do it for the children.
Chasta: Yes.
John: Got it.
Chasta: We'll get there. Let's take it back to education. This anxiety inducing hellscape. I'll just say it, that we've been living most of this year.
John: Yeah. '
Chasta: cause you have to start thinking about kindergarten, like before the child is born. Right.
John: Yeah. [00:04:00]
Chasta: Like I, so y'all, I grew up in East Tennessee. It was You love East Tennessee.
John: I do though. I, what did I say?
Chasta: I know. No, no, I'm just saying like,
John: no. Okay. It just, it seem like a little accusatory.
Chasta: No, it's, no, it's like a, you're on this, like you love it.
John: Love,
Chasta: yeah. It is. It's very unlike where we live now.
John: Yes,
Chasta: it's very, it has maintained that community feel, um, that community feel was so important in my upbringing.
And you just went to school. You had like a couple choices, but like you just went to school and everyone went to school together and here.
John: We live in Wake County, by the way, that,
Chasta: which I mean, knew Wake County, Carolina, like I knew from having the studio that it was complicated. Right. And there are all of these tracks, all of these school labels.
You've got charter, you've got magnet, you've got base, you've got private. Um, it is, it is a monolith. Is that like a good term for it, would you say, or,
John: I don't know. I [00:05:00] just keep thinking about the first time I saw the map. Of like neighborhood schools and thinking. Whoa. Who drew this?
Chasta: It's like gerrymandering.
Yeah. For schools. And they, and they do gerrymandering it like every so often
John: they read Gert.
Chasta: Yeah. John is a political science major, just so everyone knows. And I thought I wanted to be a lawyer until I had an internship at the attorney General's office, but that's a story for another day too.
John: Oh, El Woods is still on the table.
You could still get there.
Chasta: I could. Alright. So do you wanna start with where our journey began?
John: we have our wonderful son who is a pre-K student currently. Mm-hmm. On his way to kindergarten.
Chasta: Yeah.
John: And it has been no easy journey. We, um. Are somehow in a situation where we did not have any school choices for public school.
Just one. Mm-hmm. It seems like maybe most people get two.
Chasta: Some. I think they typically get [00:06:00] like maybe a traditional and a year round. Yeah. Somehow we just got a year round. That is actually gonna shift to traditional in 28, 29, and I think the theory was we just figure it out until 28, 29, but that's. It's not tomorrow.
Just
John: figure it out. Education 29. Okay.
Chasta: That's not tomorrow in 2028.
John: That's not tomorrow.
Chasta: So we started this process of, um, petitioning. Right, which this is what I will say is I think there is this fear. This kind of goes back to episode one. We were talking about the trophies, the validation. The group think this, they make the system feel difficult, but I, I encourage people, whatever system you're in and wherever you are, if you feel like you need to advocate for yourself or your child, you should like jump through the hoops.
John: Yeah. Don't just go with the status quo, go with what's going on because that's what everybody else is doing. Or because you feel. Kind of cornered into Pressured. Pressured, yeah, that's a good word.
Chasta: Pressured or judged. Um, you know, your children best. So we said, okay, like, [00:07:00] let's do it. Let's jump through the hoops.
And the hoops, um, for us were, you know, first it was a form.
John: Mm-hmm.
Chasta: A request that was denied. Then after the denial, we had a two minute hearing. Over, um, a phone call.
John: Yes.
Chasta: That I had actually passed the baton to John on and supported him through that because I was just quite frankly, just too stressed about it.
Like it had been too many applications, too many forms, too many judgements and testaments and essays, and it's like this is all for kindergarten. So you do the two minute hearing.
John: Yes.
Chasta: Which
John: I presented a strong case. I
Chasta: might
John: add.
Chasta: You did, you did. It was very, to Kill a Mockingbird, I believe you said, right?
John: Atticus myself. I did.
Chasta: And then, then we had to submit that in A PDF after. So your rehearsal kind of. Went to the wayside.
John: Right. It was like nobody
Chasta: listens
John: to what I was
Chasta: saying. And I heard you upstairs rehearsing that morning, like you wanted to make sure you had it clock in at two [00:08:00] minutes.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: So then we submitted an NPDF, then we waited, and then we were declined
John: again.
Chasta: Again. And then, then they gave us two options we didn't ask for. Yeah. They were
John: just like, so I won. Does that mean I did a good job, but not really? I, because it wasn't options that we asked for,
Chasta: right? It was very strange, right?
John: Like, we will give you options, but not what you want.
Chasta: And then like I've been writing so many documentation pieces for other people.
And they're hearing journeys.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: So, you know, I see it as a parent, but I also see it from our, our families at the studio,
John: our families at the studio
Chasta: that are navigating this, this system and this process as well.
John: I hope theirs went better than ours did.
Chasta: I mean, there's a lot of Reddit threads out there
John: in general, or because Yes, there are, but no, on, um, education in, in North Carolina and certainly the, the country and beyond as well.
Yes.
Chasta: Yeah. Um. It's worth [00:09:00] knowing. Like I just think knowledge is power and I don't think I realized how difficult and complicated and I guess the thing that I wrestle with the most, and this is from having, you know, a dance studio that is so focused on seeing every child for who they are, is it felt very institutionalized.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Like they weren't actually listening to our family or the child or like embracing us into the community. It was very bureaucratic.
John: Yeah. And I know that's something that I've heard you speak very eloquently on, and that inside of these schools, there are these amazing teachers and amazing administrators that care so much, so much, so much about these children and their journeys.
And then you've got the bureaucracy of like, yes, that that's system,
Chasta: and they're
John: diminishing. There's no, there's, and there's no like communication. I
Chasta: actually, on that call last week, I was getting a little tearful. Yeah. The, the teachers, they're so good. They're
John: wonderful. Our pre Yeah.
So
John: great.
Chasta: And they have so much potential.
John: Yeah. And even the principal Yes. At that school, he [00:10:00] knows B'S name. Yes. And he's like a, a pre-K outta a K through five.
Chasta: Yeah. It's, and, and in these like smaller, you know, communities and ecosystems, it feels very different from the bureaucracy.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: And I know that this continues from having, you know, these performing arts institutions for almost 18 years.
We know it goes into middle school and the high school and then the college admissions. I mean, whew. I was a park scholar at NC State and I still go back and help with selection and, um, selection weekend festivities. And the game has just, it just feels like the game has changed.
John: I'm sure it has. I, I try to remember back to my college, uh, admissions process.
I certainly didn't have any big scholarships or anything like my genius wife over here. But I just remember like you would get the coaching on, you know, templates and formats and stuff, and I always feel like. It could be totally wrong, [00:11:00] but as someone who has been on the other side of that with the way you help the parks, like it's probably better these like completely creative and um, not off the template essays and responses that, oh gosh, this probably draw a lot more attention.
Chasta: Authenticity's where it, that's I'm looking. Yeah. Um, and to take it back to the trophy conversation, I believe that when we start recognizing one thing to this point, templates and education, um. That's a danger. Yeah. Because then that's what is marked as the win the trophy, and that's what everybody else tries to achieve.
And then we actually lose authenticity and vulnerability, which is where the power is. And individuality. And individuality. Which is scary.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Because then we start this conformist, echo chamber mindset where we're not actually cultivating critical and creative thinkers.
John: So any listeners out there have, uh, public school stories.
Um, really any school stories of trying to get into school, trying to change schools, [00:12:00] hit us up because we definitely wanna listen
Chasta: to it. Yes, please, please join our community of, of surviving maybe, or navigating. We will survive, but we are currently still navigating. Got it. Um, now next up is, this is, this is actually a hysterical one because.
I don't know. I'm not sure I would call myself a theme park person. Would you like, okay, so I like where, where, who, so you definitely, I would say are not you like a roller coaster, but you do not like a theme park.
John: It's kinda like, you know, the system versus the individuality. Right. I don't like being out there in the theme park, but you put me on that roller coaster that's going up, down, upside down and around and around.
I do love that
Chasta: and uh, I'm trying to figure out where I fall in that.
John: Well, you certainly don't like rollercoasters. I'll see if I can find, we'll put it on the, you know, show socials. This, uh, photo of Chasta and I on like this. I believe it was Stardust is what they call it in, uh, no,
Chasta: it was some kind of racer.
John: Stardust racers in Universal.
Chasta: Okay. Yeah.
John: Yeah. Epic universe. And this [00:13:00] woman the entire time had her hand over her face and screamed just a constant screaming.
Chasta: I mean, I couldn't believe I lived, honestly,
John: I was laughing so hard. It was awesome. Huh. So, no, you're definitely not a rollercoaster person, but you do like.
Being among the crowd. You like being in places of high energy and I, I don't like that.
Chasta: I think what I like about it is I look at it as kind of a show. All the world's a stage, right?
John: Well, there was, when we tried to jump over a fence at, um, down, what are they called? Downtown Disney now
Chasta: Disney Springs.
John: Excuse me. Excuse me. Those are for cast members. Cast members only. It's like, first of all, you guys work for Mickey Mouse. You're not in a show. You're like conducting business on this. Like property, you're not a cast
Chasta: member. It did look like a walkway.
John: It did. We're in trouble. Now Mickey's gonna come for us.
Chasta: So I, one thing that I think about is, you know, you the, the children see the theme parks, right? Like they bash is very aware that theme parks exist.
John: Do we mention that we are [00:14:00] like two weeks removed from being.
Chasta: The Mecca?
John: Yeah. In the hottest park right now. Epic universe. Oh, Orlando. This is like, this is very fresh in our minds.
It's
Chasta: very fresh.
John: Um,
Chasta: but I actually wanna take it back a few years.
John: Oh no.
Chasta: So I was speaking at a conference in Orlando and the family came. You and Bash,
John: but like 1-year-old Bash.
Chasta: Yeah, 1-year-old Bash. Yeah. Several years ago. And we decide to just tiptoe into theme park. Right. So we do the Halloween party.
Everybody said it was, you have to do it. It's so fun. And I mean it is, there is something of like this, um. Survivalist mentality of like, you survive a theme park day, it's a win. But
John: why, why should you pay for that though? I didn't. I mean, why is it like that?
Chasta: He was under three, so he was
John: Oh, so he didn't pay for it.
Chasta: Yeah. Yeah. Um, but
John: totally not worth it. It was so fun. It was great.
Chasta: But do you remember, this isn't something I said shockingly, so you might remember it. Oh,
John: may, I may remember
Chasta: what you noticed [00:15:00] about being there that day. There was something missing.
John: Something missing
Chasta: and you said, yeah, like they don't have something that a lot of other places have
John: happy people.
Chasta: Well, it's in the bathroom, so, oh, so maybe there are very unhappy people in the bathroom know the riots really hit you the wrong way, or the funnel cake hits you the wrong way. But it's another thing.
John: It's in the bathrooms
Chasta: typically. And they don't have them in this particular park that we were in
John: toilet paper, like it was near the pandemic.
What are we talking about?
Chasta: No mirrors. Because they don't want you to see
John: what you look like.
Chasta: Yeah.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: The parents.
John: Oh, believe me, I saw some photos of myself after and it is probably good
Chasta: though. I know you were like, please never let these see the light of day. They're only, the only picture of us that may be worse is the one the strangers took at the Liberty Bell.
John: Oh, there you go. I forgot about that. [00:16:00] It's, yeah, it seems kind of in the same vein as the, you know, the casinos not having windows in Vegas and pumping in the oxygen so that you're, yeah.
Chasta: That was a little bit of a frustrating theme park visit for us. And I did write a letter. Do you remember?
John: I did. Nobody listened to it.
Nobody. I don't listen to Chasta. No way. You did not get any, did they even respond
Chasta: two weeks later?
John: Two weeks later?
Chasta: Yeah. But they, but for nothing.
John: They essentially, in the south, we, they told you to go, bless your heart. Now this is essentially what they
Chasta: Yeah, well, basically I was like, Hey, the cast members were cursing
John: with cast members.
Chasta: Right. They were, they were complaining that it's not
John: very Method
Chasta: Beep wasn't working.
John: They hadn't bought Marvel yet. There's no Deadpool. They shouldn't have been doing that. Yep, that's right.
Chasta: And tons of the rides were broken.
John: Also. True.
Chasta: And I think those were my two. Main things is like, hey. We couldn't really do anything and people were, people, workers [00:17:00] just didn't feel very magical.
John: Yeah. And so I think that, um, really played into the anxiety I had on our spring break trip of, I mean, do you want to talk about the way that we are looking at tickets for Epic Universe? Well, so first, first off, we're gonna throw equal shade. We're throw equal shade here. So
Chasta: first off, and, and I mean, some of it is on us too.
We are not the people that plan six months ahead, and
John: we don't have a, a year long vacation past any of these things either.
Chasta: No. We just, we kind of we're, we're scrappy, so
John: keep coming back to that. Yep.
Chasta: For like, the first time that we went was at a conference and we were just like, okay, we have a night free, so we'll do this.
This. Um, and I did go last year without you.
John: Yes.
Chasta: Remember on our mothers, mothers and Sons trip, which I should have the, all the mothers and sons on here together.
John: Oh yeah. That will have to be something different.
Chasta: Um, but then we all went this year and we still didn't have tickets
John: the night before. Yeah.
Chasta: And so we pull up the calendar to buy them and it says, sold out. Week. It's
John: Epic
Chasta: [00:18:00] universe. Epic universe. Yes. Unless we bought a three day package.
John: Unless you buy the three day package,
Chasta: I did not wanna go three days.
John: Oh, you think I did?
Chasta: I know you did. I guess you saw how
much
John: the three day pass was you?
Yeah. The money, the people. No, no, no.
Chasta: So we were like. We were weighing options.
John: Yeah. We almost hit like magic Kingdom. Yeah. We almost hit uh, no Animal Kingdom 'cause um,
Chasta: in Hollywood Studios. Yeah. Yeah. Sp loves this slinky dog. Thank goodness he loves it. 'cause I stood in line for 105 minutes last year for it,
John: but sure enough, at about 9:00 PM.
The day before we were considering going. I saw the one day pass go up for the day. We were looking for it. They released it. They released it.
Chasta: Dynamic pricing did not win.
John: And so we, and we talk about, we, um, bashes, well look, you named them this. I would, the, the ggs. I would for, you know, layman's terms godparents is family.
You named them what again?
Chasta: Well, we call them the GG for And
John: what does that stand for?
Chasta: Glitter guides to add Sparkle to life.
John: Y'all can do whatever, [00:19:00] whatever you want with that if you're still listening. But anyway, shout out to y'all. They were with us, they made that decision and we said we're doing it,
Chasta: and we did it.
And I said, we're gonna be there when the gates open and we're gonna leave when the gates close because we are gonna maximize the minutes. Right.
John: Maximize the investment. Here we go.
Chasta: I said, we've gotta get the ROI out of this, like put your walk-in shoes on and nobody be late and we're going and everybody did.
Sometimes like I am a little turbocharged for the group. Would you say
John: for anyone? Yeah, for anyone that hasn't had like eight cups of coffee, uh, yeah. I would say you can be turbocharged
Chasta: and we had a great day.
John: We really did. And that's I, I hope. That, you know, I know every day can be different there every day and things can break at different time.
It honestly felt like we were so lucky. I hope if you're considering it, I hope things go really well for you.
Chasta: We're not affiliates.
John: Um, yeah, we're, we, we're not affiliates of anything. Me receiving money from any of these groups, um, I. But yeah, it was kind of [00:20:00] cool. I know that that was like the new hot park right now because it has Nintendo world.
Um, we have a big Mario fan in our house Potter. We have a big, uh, almost 5-year-old Mario guy. I think he likes Yoshi the most, right? I don't know. Can't keep track.
Chasta: But I will say. That everyone's face lit up when at 8:00 PM I was like, I think we've done as much as we need to do.
John: We were released at early release from the theme park, and even Bash was okay with that.
So it was good.
Chasta: We had a great day.
John: Yeah,
Chasta: and you know, and I think, I think sometimes the expectation of these theme parks can feel so stressful because. There's all of these planners, right? There's all of this, like, you must get this reservation, you must do this, you must buy all these, like get on the ride fast passes.
And we've never bought those. Like I, I'm old school. Like, I'm like, if we're going, we're staying in these lines and I mean we have stood in a lot of 90 minute lines, 45 minute lines. But there is something like kind of nostalgic about the analog nature of it, right? Of and the communal. Like they were [00:21:00] NFL players in the line with us.
John: That's true.
Chasta: You know,
John: shout out Mike Glennon. What's up dude? Um, saw him in the line. That was great.
Chasta: Like
John: where He had a fast pass. Just for the record. I saw him walk past us. It wasn't like he was standing there with the rest of us. Like, oh man, I hope Donkey Kong gets to us soon. Like, nah, he was gone.
Chasta: But it's fun.
I believe that you can have a mindset of just like, let's get in there and let's do this like we used to.
John: I think you're right in many ways, uh, however, if there are those of you out there interested in the fast passes, boy do we know a lot of people that can give you details on that. It's true. So, yeah, just let's,
Chasta: and I can't, and I can't really say I've never done the Fast Pass.
I'm just being an advocate for the analog fashion.
John: Chasta loves being with people and, you know, having
Chasta: conversation,
John: having conversation. It turns out that as you are zigzagging 478 times to get to Minecart Madness or wherever you are, you can have a lot of conversations.
Chasta: You can meet a lot of people.
John: Yep.
I think, uh, Gigi, Jamie was conducting [00:22:00] business. Maybe she might have been like working remote. I probably shouldn't say that.
Chasta: She wasn't. She was actually off.
John: No,
Chasta: she had
John: the day off.
Chasta: She was
off.
John: No, she was dealing with something even though she was off.
Chasta: Yeah. But you know, hustlers gotta hustle.
John: Hustlers gotta hustle.
Chasta: Yeah. So, yeah, it was great.
, what is the, the takeaway for these folks on the theme? Just
Chasta: that you can, the takeaway, I mean, the takeaway is I just think there's so much stress about it as a parent, definitely. Of like creating this like perfect, magical. Experience.
John: Yeah. And you're saying just go out there and
Chasta: do it.
Yeah. Even if it's just like [00:23:00] a tiptoe into it. Yeah. Like it's, maybe it's a day. Like I'll tell you right now, we tried a character, Desi, uh, a character dining experience. And it was a, not, not with me, that was on the mother and son stuff. Disaster. Disaster. Like you couldn't have written a more disastrous character dining experience.
Right. He had just fallen asleep. He woke from a nap and How old was he? He was crashing out. He was three, right? He was. The pizza slices weren't the same slices they are in New York City. Tigger wasn't stopping fast enough. Poo was standing in the middle. Like in that moment I was like, this is a parent fail.
Like I started crying. I'm crashing out. He's crashing out.
John: I've had this ability, everyone since I was a child, to like avoid situations, trips, things. It's like a weird ability that I have where you, you know what? I don't think I'm gonna be there for that. And so this is another situation
Chasta: I've missed out.
Well, there have been, there have been a couple.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Then we can get into another shows.
John: But if you that have gone, if you really want some good stories, please ask Chasta about the [00:24:00] mothers and sons. 20, 24.
Chasta: Five. Five.
John: Okay.
Chasta: March, 2025.
There
John: you go. Oh, some good stories came outta that one.
Chasta: I love traveling though, and I encourage everybody with children, even when it seems hard to travel to just go, because I think you create the best memories even when it's crazy.
Even when it's unexpected, even when it's unpredictable, right? Like. Some of our best memories are from don't
John: be afraid to travel. Don't afraid. And I was, I, I'll be the first to admit it. I was, I was one of those people that, you know, there'd be a kid screaming on the plane or you know, kids fighting on the plane.
I was like, oh my gosh, I put my headphones in. You know what, I'm a parent now. I do not care. You get your baby on that plane. I'll support you. Hold it if I need to. It's awesome. I think
it's
Chasta: awesome to seek kids
John: on a plane. The rest of us, us parental community, we'll take care of each other. All right?
Don't worry about the, you know, people that are. Disgruntled.
Chasta: Yeah. Their energy. Like they just gotta breathe.
John: I feel. I know, that was what I, I guess I just started, started breathing.
Chasta: But I feel like you were kind of a prickly pair
John: back in
Chasta: the day.
John: Oh, I was. You mean traveling, would you, I didn't
Chasta: even wanna sit next
John: to [00:25:00] you.
Yeah, I know. I'm aware.
Chasta: I would just, you would go in a different row and put your headphones on and
John: I would not go in a different row.
Chasta: Sometimes you'd be
John: across the
Chasta: aisle's too much.
John: Yeah, well if there was open seats, 'cause back in, however, whenever that was pre pandemic, you know, there, before we were like stunted in open seats on a plane, weren't.
Strapped like a cargo trying to maximize profits.
Chasta: But it is this, it is this idea of just go. Just do the thing. Yeah.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Like I think there's so much like parenting advice and that's one thing with the schools, we're talking about it with theme parks and travel. We're gonna get to it with the birthday parties, there's so much pressure of like, this is what this looks like, or this is the age to take your kid to Europe, or this is the age to do the theme park.
But like if your gut is saying, do something like just
John: do it, just about say what is the number one thing.
Chasta: Yeah.
John: You tell people, trust your,
Chasta: trust, your gut.
John: Like, it's always, it's even if it, even if something comes out of it wrong, it's still right. And no matter how many hours you spend on chat, GPT or Google or Reddit trying to figure something out, if your gut.
Is telling you something. [00:26:00] Otherwise you need to listen to the gut.
Chasta: And there's almost like we can curate so many things in our life now, right? Like we don't go to Blockbuster and pick our movies. The streaming service gives us the options. Um, we don't pick the cassette or the CD from the music store, like Spotify gives us the options.
Um, and same with these experiences. Like we can plan so much ahead of time, but part of the wonder is in the discovery of just saying, alright, let's see what this day holds. Um. And just doing it and living it, like that's life. And I will always say parents should never regret taking time to make a memory with their child.
Early childhood is so fast. My parents passed away very young. So time is this huge resource. Um, so use it like, how are you using it?
John: That is the one of the biggest things I've learned from you and just, um, you know, your life experiences is my realization that time is the ulti more so than money time Yeah.
Is the ultimate resource. And you, like we
Chasta: never, we don't know what
John: it is. Do not know. How [00:27:00] much time you, the people you love are going to have. So use that time, use it wisely. You just
Chasta: gotta do it.
John: Do it. And I do a lot of stuff
now that I had never imagined doing.
Thanks for that realization dear,
Chasta: and we appreciate it.
John: There we
Chasta: go. Especially New Year's. This year you really went out on a limb,
John: like we're gonna take one travel trip. Uh, one travel trip at a time. Okay. One at a time on the show.
Chasta: Get out there and do it. Plan a, plan a trip today, just after listening to this. Like pick some fun to go. Yeah.
John: Doesn't be a theme park.
It could be in be. I would probably recommend not.
Chasta: It could be local, you know, just take a day and do something out of the ordinary. Make a memory. Alright. Speaking on memories and productions, birthday parties.
John: Oh boy.
Chasta: Our son loves the idea of a birthday party. Doesn't he? He does. I think it's because maybe we're in the performing arts and he sees things as a production, and I do feel like we've done a really good job of saying like, cake in the backyard is perfectly fine.
Like [00:28:00] I, I feel like we really do manage the birthday party thing. But there is this like birthday party culture of like, where to draw the line on invitations and um, like where does the budget stop and what do we do and when's the date and what are people, are people going to come, are people not going to come?
It's, it's so complicated. Right? They're
John: supposed to bring presents or, yeah,
Chasta: presents. No, presents open. The presents, Don. Don't open the presents. Um, allergies, food. Just making sure everyone has a good time. Um. And we are on that journey right now kind of figuring out, because I was like, let's go somewhere to take it back to the theme parks,
John: inexperience.
Chasta: Let's have an experience and let's have an experience. I say that a lot, don't I?
John: You
Chasta: do. I said, let's have an experience. Any experience you want. Let's go to the NASCAR museum.
John: Yeah. And
Chasta: he was not taking it.
John: He did not take that deal. Mm.
Chasta: But I knew we were having a party one a few weeks ago. He said it was really because he wanted all of his relatives there.[00:29:00]
John: It's kinda sweet.
Chasta: And I was like, that's sweet. Like that is saying like these moments, these memories are a priority. And that's something that I wanna teach as well.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: So let's also figure out how we can kind of combine the two. And I think we found a good balance, right?
John: A good balance of Mario Hamilton, Florida Gators.
Chasta: Well, he wants to perform.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: So
John: I'm not sure how balanced any of this is, but yes, we found
Chasta: something. But so, so this is my approach. This is, this is what I have done. This is very outside of the typical birthday box, I would say, is we sit down and I say, tell me your vision.
John: Yeah. And it's sit sitting down.
And seriously saying that to a 4-year-old is diabolical. I mean, like, you've put yourself in whatever situation
Chasta: you, well, you do have to like, you have to guide it, the conversation.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Like, let's see, let's let the creativity be in action. Let's, you know, we set the structure of like, okay, this is where you advocated for it to [00:30:00] be.
This is where it's going to be. This is what we can make happen. We can have some food. So what are the food options? What's the entertainment? Loves a show. So. Easy
John: performing in his own party. Easy.
Chasta: And then what's the spirit, right? I believe that fun parties have a lot of spirit, they have a lot of conversation.
So how can the, how can the decorations lend themselves to that? You know, like last year, if you'll remember, it was Lightning McQueen, the Grinch, the three Little Pigs and the Peanuts characters on a football field. For the cake.
John: And why would you ever limit yourself to a singular theme for a child's birthday party?
It just,
Chasta: yeah,
John: when you could mix so
Chasta: many, you
John: don't
Chasta: have to buy those like, curated kits. And I think that's where like, I've found some of the fun. 'cause I'm not a, I'm not really a big party. Like I feel like because I'm in so many performances and productions and putting on things all the time, I, I'm not a big party person and I don't think you really are either.
Like, we don't host parties.
John: No.
Chasta: Unless, I mean, our life [00:31:00] is. Hosting performances and events.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: But we're not like, let's have everyone over for like a murder dinner theater.
John: That was the first option you picked is that actually sold?
Chasta: Well, because I was doing licensing the other day. Oh. And I saw you could license that, and I was like, wow, that's an interesting idea.
John: I've never been to a murder dinner theater, so that would be my first one.
Chasta: But it's, that's just not really who we are. We don't really have barbecues or
John: Oh, I'll be in agreement with
Chasta: you. Yeah. Um, and we do like people, it's just, I think we just have to have a little bit of downtime,
John: which
Chasta: you might,
John: I think that I like a lot of downtime.
I do think you and your son are not fond of it, but me and our sweet Scottish Ter or Elvis, we love a little downtime.
Chasta: Hosting is like, it's, it's a lot.
John: Hosting is a whole different ball game than showing up to something. Yes.
Chasta: Yeah. So that's why I think I try to, I find fun when once we decided like, okay, well yeah, we are doing this again.[00:32:00]
Um, 'cause I remember a few years ago I really wanted, I said for the fifth birthday we would do. Route 66.
John: That's what you said,
Chasta: which kind of combines 0.2 and 0.3.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Travel and birthday.
John: And experience.
Chasta: And experience. But we didn't plan it, so it didn't happen.
John: Gasoline prices these days, the Route 66 drive wasn't happening,
Chasta: so, but we have had fun having conversations about what will this look like?
So I think that that is where it can be. And I think too often it's like, you know, you see all of these curated packages you can buy, but it's like, what is, what's the fun of that?
John: Yeah. They're all set up for social media
Chasta: really. Yeah.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: And I mean, this will look a hodgepodge hot mess.
John: Yeah. Was I about to say?
Like, lemme tell you, the Lightning McQueen peanuts, uh, football cake was not looking, uh, gram was not an impression killer on the gram.
Chasta: No, but there was something like so cool about
John: it and he lo he still has all the figurines off the top puzzle just about every day.
Chasta: And the [00:33:00] cake vision for this year. I don't even think you fully know
John: it yet.
Oh. I mean, I don't think I've seen it. Uh, will
Chasta: Bemed gonna, I gonna surprise you like the s this year with it.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Because it is quite it. I mean, it takes the peanuts on a football field. Into
John: Strat Sphe. Yeah. I'm really most probably interested in how you found Hamilton characters. I assume that's probably on Etsy or something.
I don't know, but
Chasta: Well, you don't know that that's part of it.
John: Yes, I do. Yes, I do.
Chasta: Yeah. Well, I will say they're
John: not, you're, they're not, you're not me showing up like, uh, they're not quite George Washington or something, or the wig on.
Chasta: You are?
John: No, I say you're gonna have me do that. I just haven't found
Chasta: out they, um, they're not as readily available as the peanuts.
John: I would, I would think that if it's something, you know,
Chasta: if you dig deep enough,
John: Disney has some kind of relationship. You know, Lin Manuel, I'm surprised they don't have Yeah. A Hamilton collector set.
Chasta: Maybe one day come in soon.
John: Yeah. I just gave him an idea for free. Hate that.
Chasta: So I think, you know, when [00:34:00] you're thinking about this and the production of parenting, I mean, what are your thoughts?
Those are kind of my three most pressing things from, from this year is just like the schooling, the, the travel, the experiences. And then the birthday parties have just kind of been, and maybe it's 'cause we're in this peak, like end of year. You know, there's so much happening at the end of the year that it all kind of, it starts stacking, but what have you kind of felt just,
John: yeah, I think those were just great, um, options to pick for this episode because it's things that, you know, pr a lot of people, a lot of us have experienced and a lot of us have struggled with.
Uh, and, but there's just, it's such a, everyone tells you. I would say the number one thing I hear from people is you have no idea how fast the time goes. Mm-hmm. And you can hear that a million times. And it's still true and it's still faster than you think. And so I think for me, the number one thing about parenting is just being present.
And I feel like sometimes [00:35:00] I can forget that and I. It does not actually cost any money just to be present in listening to your child. And I know everyone's child wants to be listened to, but ours who never stops talking, he really, really wants to be listened to. So if you just, if you show up with that presence, I.
I think
Chasta: that's the number one. One thing. It really, that's, and from having the studios, and I always say like, I really think having the business made me a better mother and being a mother makes me a better business owner. I think they are very cross respect of each other. And the number one thing for a child.
And I think that goes for schools, for theme parks, birthday parties. The only thing that they really, really want is to be seen for who they authentically are.
Joe Woolworth: Yeah.
Chasta: And I think that goes back to the trophies thing, right? So if they have 10 hodgepodge things they wanna throw together on the party table.
If that isn't gonna look so great on social channels, like who cares if they are being [00:36:00] seen and their own authentic creativity is being cultivated? It's a win, right? Because you don't have, we don't have to have this pressure to manufacture joy. Joy can come from within, and it starts at that very young age, and how we respond to that desire is going to last with them for a lifetime.
John: Could not have put that any better myself.
Chasta: Yeah.
John: Sometimes it comes out of her like crazy, y'all, you gotta be ready. Gotta be ready. She'll just start preaching. So,
Chasta: but it is fun. It is a I'm, you know, we didn't really know that we would have a child.
John: No,
Chasta: we weren't sure. And we did. I. And the interesting thing is we
John: planned on it.
I will say.
Chasta: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. But when he was born in 2021, coming out of the pandemic, like I was really ready to go.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: Like, I was like, let's travel, let's do this, let's do that. Um, let's get the equipment. Let's just stay on the go. I mean, I was schlepping him everywhere.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: We had a douna and we were unstoppable off to the races.
John: Yep. For those of you that [00:37:00] don't know, it was a, uh, car seat that would immediately snap into a stroller that we probably used way too long due to its convenience, but, uh, so convenient. It was. Like stretching outta there. Like, I mean, I don't even know. He was so big for that
Chasta: thing. We were actually, when we were in San Diego,
John: I'm like lifting with two hands, like standing there, buddy.
Come on now.
Chasta: Do you remember getting off the plane in San Diego? And I was, this is something that John could attest to, but I will say nobody listens to me, but sometimes I really get things wrong and I don't want to admit it. And I'm admitting that right here, right now.
John: Hopefully that's recorded.
Hopefully we got that.
Chasta: But we walked off this plane and do you remember,
John: oh,
Chasta: you tried
John: to get the wrong stroller?
Chasta: Yeah, because I said there was, there was, this is what it was like needed to be gone. I said there was no way we would have a stroller that looked that dirty.
John: Yeah, no, that was ours. And
Chasta: you were like, no, please don't take that other person's stroller.
John: It might've been a little psychosis coming on from the holiday stomach bug we had all had right before that trip. But that was our stroller [00:38:00]
Chasta: and it was. I was like, it's gone. It's gone. This is, it's retiring today.
John: Mm-hmm. And he was actually big enough to pick it up and throw it out at that point. So it was all good.
Chasta: So many, so many stories. And I think that is the best thing about parenting is even when it feels stressful, even when it feels hard. We have each other.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: And I think that's the coolest thing about it, is we have this little pack, this little family that we get to start and end each day with most days, regardless of what happens in between beginning and end.
It is an opportunity to have a day together. And I've noticed, um, bash really appreciating that. And at night, you know, as he like talks through his gr through his gratitude or his prayers, he, he always says, I'm thankful for this day.
John: Yeah.
Chasta: And I think that's just what we have to be. We have to be thankful for this day
John: heard.
Chasta: So if you have stayed with us and listened to us on the production of parenting and some of our highlights as of [00:39:00] late kindergarten theme parks, travel, birthday parties. If you're out there doing it, you are doing a better job than you probably think. I hope that you all have people in your, in your sphere that will tell you that.
'cause it feels hard some days, right?
John: Keep going,
Chasta: keep going. Keep because you just, like we were saying about the trophies, not having the trophies builds better. Humans living in this joy and pushing for this authentic, joyful existence builds better humans too. And I think at the end of the day, potentiality is what I care most about.
I deeply believe that I'm an architect of human potential, and I like seeing it create in all different kinds of spaces, and I think there aren't enough people thinking about children, and that impacts adults too. So we gotta think about the kids. We gotta take care of ourselves. If you stayed with us and you listened, please subscribe, come back, hear more conversation about other topics that we are gonna dig into.
We have youth activities coming up. We have private equity, [00:40:00] we have addiction culture. We are going there. We have what it feels like to be a loser. So many things heading your way. So stay tuned and thanks for listening.