Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
What if you could get more of what you want in life? But not through pushing, forcing, or pressure.
You can.
When it comes to money, time, and energy, no one’s gonna turn away more.
And Kate Northrup, Bestselling Author of Money: A Love Story and Do Less and host of Plenty, is here to help you expand your capacity to receive all of the best.
As a Money Empowerment OG who’s been at it for nearly 2 decades, Kate’s the abundance-oriented best friend you may not even know you’ve always needed.
Pull up a chair every week with top thought leaders, luminaries, and adventurers to learn how to have more abundance with ease.
Women's intuition, like, when something feels off and something truly is a deal breaker. Like, if someone says to you, I never wanna have kids and I'm clear about that, and you do, that's a very different conversation than I'm in debt right now. I have a huge work ethic. I got a big vision. I'm clear about what I need to do.
Christine Hassler:It that wasn't a red flag. That was more like this isn't my preference and my stuff is coming up versus need isn't being met. Something feels off here. So for people with with relationships or anything, yes, you don't wanna, like, be, like, so controlling that that things have to hit all your marks, but you also wanna be really clear about your values and your standards and not settle.
Kate Northrup:Hello. I'm here today with my really good friend, Christine Hassler. She is an OG in the coaching industry. She's a real pioneer. She is the best selling author of Expectation Hangover, the host of Over and On With It podcast.
Kate Northrup:And in this episode, we really dive into being the queen and how to attract love in your life. Also, the repulsive behaviors that will prevent romantic love from coming in, how we can work with our inner child to heal things on so many different levels, and some of the red flags in the coaching industry and how we can really work with integrity and alignment as consumers and also as coaches. Enjoy the episode. Welcome to Plenti. I'm your host, Kate Northrup, and together, we are going on a journey to help you have an incredible relationship with money, time, and energy, and to have abundance on every possible level.
Kate Northrup:Every week, we're gonna dive in with experts and insights to help you unlock a life of plenty. Let's go fill our cups.
[voice over]:Please note that the opinions and perspectives of the guests on the Plenty podcast are not necessarily reflective of the opinions and perspectives of Kate Northrop or anyone who works within the Kate Northrop brand.
Kate Northrup:Hi. Hi. Thanks for being here.
Christine Hassler:My pleasure.
Kate Northrup:I'm so happy to talk to you. Okay. So before we got started, you just revealed something to me, which I had no idea. I thought that you always had wanted to be a mom. I don't know why I made that assumption, which is probably cultural conditioning, so I'll just call myself out on that.
Kate Northrup:Mhmm. But now you have this gorgeous, little, delicious pumpkin, and I wanna know what happened, like, to get to the place where you are having this experience with this whole new life that I didn't realize I knew you want I knew you were looking for your king, and my own internalized conditioning made the assumption that you were also wanting a baby. Isn't that interesting? Isn't that interesting. Tell me more.
Christine Hassler:Well, I think the other reason you might have assumed that is because when we first met 10 years ago, that's right around when I was freezing my eggs. Yes. And so everyone assumed, oh, she's freezing her eggs because she really, really wants a baby, and that actually wasn't the reason that I was doing it. I was doing it because I know myself, and I know that I have a part of me that just really enjoys beating myself up. I work on that part.
Christine Hassler:I understand that part has a protective purpose. I understand it's really trying to protect me. And it's it's I've learned how to work with it, and I've lowered the volume on that part over the years, but I I know that there's a tendency for me to regret and, like, go back and do the shoulda, coulda, woulda. And so I had I got divorced in my early thirties. And at 34, I was hearing again all the cultural stuff around, like, you're 35.
Christine Hassler:You're basically dead. You know? You're geriatric. It's all dry enough. And I was that was really getting to me.
Christine Hassler:So there were there were 2 main reasons I decided to freeze my eggs. 1, I did not want the pressure and stress of age and a biological clock to have me make decisions, specifically jumping into a relationship that wasn't quite right too soon. Sure. Because I think that a lot of times, we can whether it's having a baby or something else, when we have a timeline on ourselves, it can cloud our decision making, and we can make decisions through more of that mental control place than that really intuitive self honoring place. So that was the number one reason.
Christine Hassler:I just wanted to take time off the table. The second one was going back to that part of me that loves to regret and shoulda, coulda, woulda, be mean to myself. I didn't want 42 year old me to then, like, want a baby and go, oh, man. I wish I woulda froze my eggs. And the funny thing was I was assuming that I wouldn't be able to get pregnant in my forties, but then lo and behold, I got pregnant completely naturally in my forties very easily Yeah.
Christine Hassler:Which I feel so blessed about and didn't even need to use my eggs. So the whole having a child thing for me, it was definitely not clear, even after I met my husband. Like, he was more clear and and a yes before I was. And the reason why is because, again, like, I know myself. I'm with myself.
Christine Hassler:I've been working on myself. I mean, I started therapy when I was 11. Wow. And the one thing about me that now I've just accepted is just a part of me and just part of how I'm wired is I worry. And at a young age, I paired worry and love very closely together, and I've been working on hooking them.
Christine Hassler:And my spiritual practice really helps a lot. But the human Christine and how I'm wired and what I whatever karma I came into this world with, I tend to worry. And I was like, gosh. I know I'm gonna love this kid so much. Can I handle that amount of love?
Christine Hassler:Like, honestly, that was really what I had to recognize. Like, can I and I'm gonna get choked up thinking about it because I just love her so darn much? Like, can I handle that amount of love? Because it's just I knew it would be life changing, and it's even more life changing now that I've experienced it. And what finally got me to a yes was, do I wanna make this choice from love or fear?
Christine Hassler:And I really saw I was making it more from a place of fear. I was making it more from a place of, I don't know if I wanna worry about that something that much or love something that big. And that's been my biggest growth edge is, like, loving and opening my heart so much that it hurts. You know? And saying yes to that.
Christine Hassler:And, of course, in motherhood, I've really had to watch that hypervigilance and that anxiety and and respond to it in different ways. Because when I move and I think this applies to any decision. When I moved fear out of the way, the answer became really clear. Wow. And, also, she started coming to me.
Christine Hassler:And so it was very clear to me. I knew I was having a girl. She told me her name. I did not name her, and it felt like a huge soul contract between her. Wow.
Kate Northrup:Ugh. So excited to see how that continues to play too. As she gets older because, you know, the older my girls get, I can just feel our relation you know, of course, when, you know, when they're little, there is that soul contract. But now that we just have real conversations, it's wild to just, every now and again, have them call me out on my stuff and, you know, and see how raising them is stretching me in these interesting ways and developing me. And so I'm just I'm excited for that for you.
Kate Northrup:It's really it's really amazing and something that I think nothing else would have brought that into my life in that way. So Yeah. Even though all relationships do that on some level.
Christine Hassler:All relationships do.
Kate Northrup:And I know that, the last time I saw you in person, actually, you were pregnant, and you told me the amazing story of how you met your husband
Christine Hassler:Yeah.
Kate Northrup:How you met Steph. And, it was actually very medicinal for me in that particular moment because we were in the deep throes of Mike's illness and then injuries, and I really needed the medicine of this story. So I'm wondering, could you could you tell the story, the version of it that you'd like to tell today?
Christine Hassler:I don't remember exactly what I said to you, but I think I have some idea because I think it was that dinner and then dinner you and I had in Austin. It was, like, those two conversations. So, well, like I said, I got divorced in my early thirties. I was single for a long time, nearly a decade, and it was a time when everyone was getting married and having babies. And, again, I was face to face with, okay.
Christine Hassler:Like, what's the conditioning, and what's my journey? And that was such an important lesson for me and something that I really encourage people to, like, go within. Like, not to look outside on how things are supposed to be going, but, you know, what's your individual unique journey and timeline? Yep. Because it's not a one size fits all approach.
Christine Hassler:And I, you know, had my fair share of dating lessons. People would ask me what's my type, and I'm like, line up all the men. I'll tell you exactly what issue I was working on at the time, and that was my type. You know? It was, like, clearing so much and healing so much.
Christine Hassler:And I finally got to the point where I realized I was trying to control it. I was I was trying to make it happen because I I was trying to take all my entrepreneurial skills and shift them into calling and love, and, you know, that doesn't work. So Really? I'm sure you're shocked.
Kate Northrup:I'm sure you're shocked. But it makes sense because you you have been a very successful coach in this space for decades. 20 years. Yeah. Keynote speaker.
Kate Northrup:I mean, you've been one of the trailblazers, and you've been very successful in your career. Mhmm. And so it makes sense that you would we would try to apply one skill set in one area to another skill set. Yeah. What did not work about applying your entrepreneurial skill set to finding your husband?
Christine Hassler:Not trusting. Trying to make it happen. Thinking it was all up to me. You know? Trying to be strategic, going to this dating coach or that dating coach, and, you know, trying to do it a certain way, blocking off time that I was going to be in my feminine.
Christine Hassler:Okay. That's amazing.
Kate Northrup:Like, in your calendar? Yeah. And okay. So what did that look like?
Christine Hassler:Oh, it could look like I mean, I didn't know what the fuck I was doing, to be totally honest. I was just, like, I was so in my head trying to figure it out. You know? And, again, it was trying to make it happen. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:So it it's sort of like, okay. Well, if I had, you know, a new course I wanted to launch, like, what would I do? What would be the checklist? There's a checklist. There's a plan.
Christine Hassler:And it was more, like, the energy I was bringing versus specific things I was doing. And so, anyway, I I finally had a realization. It was like New Year's of 20, I don't know, 16, 17, turning into 18. And I was like, wow. I am just gripping on so tight.
Christine Hassler:Once again, we're back to fear. I'm back in fear. Like, control comes so much from fear. If we think about where does control originate from? Well, in childhood, we aren't grasping for control.
Christine Hassler:I mean, there's a natural stage of psychological development where we look at autonomy, and we want sovereignty and all that. But, like, trying to control our lives and gripping on tightly, that happens, again, usually as a trauma response. The rug gets pulled out from under us. We live in chaos. Something doesn't go as planned, and we just overcompensate by really trying to control.
Christine Hassler:So that was just one of my coping strategies, and it was a fear based strategy. So when I realized that, because I've been at coaching for so long, but sometimes I'm my slowest client. Like, you know, like it takes me a second to realize what I'm doing in my own life. And I said, okay, I'm really gonna surrender. I'm not gonna pretend to surrender.
Christine Hassler:I'm actually gonna surrender. So, I had my list, like any woman who's calling in her man does, have, like, all the things that I wanted to call in for my man. And at the time, I was living on the ocean in Encinitas, California, North County San Diego. And I took my list out, and I just set it on fire. And I said, okay, God, You pick.
Christine Hassler:Because, clearly, my picker is off. Like, I had a series yeah. I just dating wasn't going well. And that's when and it was scary. It was scary to be like, okay.
Christine Hassler:Because I could feel the part of me going and, again, this applies to anything, not just calling in love. I could feel the part of me going, but but but but but I really need this thing. I surrender, but make sure he's this. I surrender, but this thing's super important. Do you know that God?
Christine Hassler:Like, do you and so I I thought I had this image. This is so weird. I had this image of, like, when I go to a restaurant and I order my dinner, I don't go then follow the server into the kitchen and be like, did you get that? Did you get this one piece? Do you remember I wanted this?
Christine Hassler:And then watch the cook, and I just order and trust it's coming. Yeah. So I was like, I need to be more like I need to be more like I'm eating in a restaurant when when it comes to this. So it was that deep surrender of I trust. The next week, I get kicked out of my home in San Diego, which I loved.
Christine Hassler:Lived on the beach, loved it. Landlord was a bit crazy, and I I I actually mean that. She was something was not okay. And, said I was letting homeless people live on the property, said, like, all this this. It was it was so left field that I was like, okay.
Christine Hassler:The universe is up to something because I am being ejected from my dream house. And I was like, okay. Trust. And that's the thing. Like, people think surrender is sexy spiritual.
Christine Hassler:Like, oh, I surrender. I'm being the feminine. And and, no, Collie comes in, and stuff gets destroyed. And, like, stuff has to be rearranged. So often there is that breakdown and destruction where you're, like, in the eye of the storm going, okay.
Christine Hassler:I surrender, and nothing seems to be making sense. It can feel very chaotic, and then that's when you actually know you're truly surrendering. And so I was in the sorry. This is a long story. I'll just
Kate Northrup:straighten it up. I'm loving
Christine Hassler:it. Okay. Carry on. Okay. So I'm
Kate Northrup:in this no hurry. You have plenty of time.
Christine Hassler:Plenty of time. Yeah. So I'm in this surrender, kicked out of my dream home going, oh my gosh. I'm nearly 40 years old. Like, what's happening to my life?
Christine Hassler:And I try to find another place, can't find anything, and I'm like, okay. I'm just gonna travel, which is so not me. You know? Not me to, like, have my I'm a Virgo. I like to be grounded.
Christine Hassler:I like to know where my jewelry is. Like, I like to be unpack even when like, last night, I'm coming for 2 days. I am fully unpacked. That's incredible.
Kate Northrup:I like to ground.
Christine Hassler:Wow. And so but I just, again, surrendered, trusting. And so I packed my bags and went to Australia. Always had had been there a bunch. Like, always had a pool there.
Christine Hassler:Kinda thought I'd end up with an Australian. Get there. Start dating this guy. That didn't turn out well. Come back, fractured my foot, was back in my what am I doing?
Christine Hassler:I'm living out of suitcases, and my friends said, We're gonna be giving our lease up. Come look at our place back in San Diego. So I go to their house, and the the male friend was sitting on his computer looking at his startup, and he said, Christine, can you come look at his webpage? Tell me tell me what you think. And I sit down, and my now husband, Steph, was on the screen.
Christine Hassler:His picture was there. And I said, I know him and never had met him in my life, but it was some some kind of soul recognition. Wow. And they said, well, he actually is Australian. I'm like, oh, forget it.
Christine Hassler:Like, no. I'm I'm writing off Australian men. No. I'm not doing it. And my friend said, no.
Christine Hassler:He's really great. I'm like, yeah. Right. Look at him. Like, he's got girls on rotation.
Christine Hassler:Like, She's like, No, I think he's really calling his person, and you're both gonna be in Europe this summer. Let me introduce you. And this is where, like, when I got back from that Australia trip, and I had kind of another pattern of a man who wasn't emotionally available for relationship, And I thought, but I'll change him. No. No.
Christine Hassler:No. He won't. No. No. No.
Christine Hassler:No. I was done with that, and I was really clear what my boundaries were, and I was really clear that, like, I wanted a man to be in the same place I was because I was really ready for rare not necessarily marriage that wasn't, like, a must for me, but committed long term relationship. And so I said, ask him straight up, like, is he calling in his person, or is he still dating? Because those are 2 very different energetics. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:And she called him, and, coincidentally, he had just come out of a meditation, like, a few days prior where he felt his person and was like, okay. I'm ready. And she connected us. We talked for 3 months over WhatsApp and then met in Greece because we were both in Europe and moved in together that day, and that was 6 years ago. That's amazing.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. But the the piece that I'll share, because that's the beautiful part. Totally. So the hard part and the part where I was like, really, god? Uh-huh.
Christine Hassler:Is one of the things that was on my list that I burned was I wanted him to be as financially successful or
Kate Northrup:more than me.
Christine Hassler:That was not the case with Yeah. Yeah. And that was really challenging for me, because here I met this man who I felt safe with. It was a different feeling. It wasn't like the fireworks anxious attachment kind of thing.
Christine Hassler:It felt very secure from the beginning and exciting. Yeah. But it it felt healthy. And but when I found that out, I was like, woah. This is this is very confronting.
Christine Hassler:And isn't it interesting how the universe, like, knows exactly what button to push to see if we're really willing to trust and to see if we're really willing to shift. Because what I had to question is, okay. Well, why don't I want a man less successful than me financially? Like, what is my story Yeah. Around that?
Christine Hassler:And, like, why is it a problem if I'm the breadwinner? And what I got to is I like, purpose and drive is very attractive to me. And, like, I knew I couldn't be with a dreamer. But what I saw in Steph is he had the ambition. He had the work ethic.
Christine Hassler:He just didn't have the right support. And so I saw him working. I saw his his ethic. He wasn't sitting in Starbucks just, like, hanging out thinking, I think I'll write a screenplay. No.
Christine Hassler:I think I'll start a jewelry business. No. I think I mean, he was he was very clear about what his purpose was. And so what came up inside of me was, like, okay. Let me just go and control.
Christine Hassler:Like, I'll coach him. So sexy. Great for polarity in relationship. Excellent. If you want hotness in your relationship, definitely try to be a coach or therapist to your partner.
Christine Hassler:It works every time. K. I hope everyone knows we're being totally sarcastic. And I knew that wouldn't work, and I didn't wanna do that, Kate. Like, I just didn't want to.
Christine Hassler:And so I was like, alright. Well, what okay. If I'm more in this masculine energetic, and who's to say that's masculine, but if I'm more in this energetic of bringing in the money Mhmm. How do I balance that inside of me and and, like, have this polarity? And so what I decided to step into is fully being his muse.
Christine Hassler:Like, fully being the inspiration, the support, the I believe in you. Not the subservient, I don't have a voice, 19 fifties. No. We're not going back here. We're actually going up.
Christine Hassler:Like, I shifted my frequency to love, to nonjudgment, and to really believing in him. And it was such a great experiment inside myself because it was like, wow. Have I ever done that for myself? Like, that level just really believed in my own worth and ability.
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:So it shifted us both. And by just believing that and introducing him to people, and, like, I'd kinda set some things up, be like, here. I'd hand him a ball, and he would run with it. He would just run and then find another ball. And now we're at the point after we had our daughter, you know, he really took the lead, and it it's not even an issue anymore.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. So I'm glad that, you know, I allowed myself to feel that and be and we talked about it. I was like, this is this is not what I wanted, and this is very confronting for me. But I'm glad I didn't let that, you know, prevent me from stepping into this love.
Kate Northrup:A 100%, because it's, what, like, 6 years later.
Christine Hassler:Yeah.
Kate Northrup:That's not that long in terms of your lifetime, and, like, imagine if you would have missed out
Christine Hassler:Yeah.
Kate Northrup:On this love because it didn't look right on paper. Right. And I had a similar situation when I met Mike in certain ways, not not real but, like and then later on, when he was sick and injured so many times, I really was, like, in this this dynamic of resentment. Mhmm. And hearing you tell that story made me realize that the piece that I had forgotten was the, like, deep commitment and trust and believing in him, and I was so tired and resentful Yeah.
Kate Northrup:That I had lost track of that. And so that dinner with you Mhmm. Was actually a major turning point in our relationship. So thank you
Christine Hassler:for that. Yeah. Well, thank you for being willing to hear it.
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:I mean, letting go of resentment, especially when we believe we have a right to have it, which in so many ways you did. Like, if we just talk facts, it was hard. It was hard. It was really hard, and you're holding a line.
Kate Northrup:But just because things are hard doesn't mean I mean, listen. I think that all emotions are actually useful, and I have no I don't I don't regret my resentment. However, it's also there are so many different responses we can have to any given scenario, and, like, I was just sick of my resentment, which is Yeah. Why I was available to hear it. So Yeah.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Yeah. I was just like that. Now I'm boring myself with this same old story. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:Okay. This is so great. So I know that you work actually with women
Christine Hassler:Yep.
Kate Northrup:Around finding their king, and Steph comes in and does a little bit of that He does the same. Uh-huh.
Christine Hassler:Okay. Yeah. Cool.
Kate Northrup:And he is so wonderful. I've had minimal interactions with him, but the interactions I've had, it was just, like, what a beautiful man. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:He really does create glad
Kate Northrup:you 2 found each other.
Christine Hassler:He does create safe space for women. He really does.
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:It's nice to have a man in this space that doesn't have leaky energy.
Kate Northrup:Not at all. No. No. And I've listened to him on podcasts and, like, insightful, wise Yeah. You know, all of those things.
Kate Northrup:Clean energy. So great. Mhmm. And I think that we need that sort of modeling to heal some of our own patterning that's maybe not so healthy. So what are you mentioned control was, like, a real thing of yours and moving from fear.
Kate Northrup:Yep. What is 1 or 2 other things that you see women doing habitually that are is likely keeping love from them? Yeah. Romantic love. Great question.
Kate Northrup:Well, and it's probably keeping all the love from them.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. Love, money, your what? Friends, better relationships, your job, like, yeah. What are our repulsive behaviors? Okay.
Christine Hassler:That's That's a super great question. I just wanna go back and, like, backtrack for a second and say something I think is relevant and important about not settling. Great. You know, Steph not being in a financial place, that's very different than a red flag. And so I would just wanna make sure we highlight that women's intuition, like, when something feels off and something truly is a deal breaker.
Christine Hassler:Like, if someone says to you, I never wanna have kids and I'm clear about that, and you do, that's a very different conversation than I'm in debt right now. I have a huge work ethic. I got a big vision. I'm clear about what I need to do. It's that wasn't a red flag.
Christine Hassler:That was more like this isn't my preference, and my stuff is coming up versus something, like, a need isn't being met. Something feels off here. So for people with with relationships or anything, yes. You don't wanna, like, be, like, so controlling that things have to hit all your marks, but you also wanna be really clear about your values and your standards and not settle. Great.
Kate Northrup:Such a good clarification. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:So the things that are repulsive.
Kate Northrup:Back to repulsive behavior. Yes.
Christine Hassler:So I wanna elaborate on that control one first. Because one of the biggest things that we hear, especially for women that join us for be the queen, that's our program for women calling in in their partner, is I need to be more in my feminine. I'm too much in my masculine. And my response to that is usually, no. You're not.
Christine Hassler:You're actually in hypervigilance. You're just regulated, and you're in an adaptive pattern. Because true masculine isn't being busy, isn't being stressed, isn't having adrenal fatigue. It it and so many women are just controlling and are so busy and be like, I need to be more my feminine. I need to get out of my masculine.
Christine Hassler:No. You actually need to deal with what is creating that hypervigilance and trauma response inside of you. Because for so many people, and we're talking about women in this case, something happens in our life where it's not safe to be ourselves anymore. It's not safe to really surrender, to be in our authentic expression. Maybe we're told we're too much.
Christine Hassler:Maybe we're told we're not enough, or we're not even told that, but we infer it from what happens in our life. And so we develop an overcompensation strategy, and we over adapt. Superpower of the feminine, adaptivity, but we can take it way into the shadows and be over adaptable and busy ourselves. So oftentimes, that busyness that women think is being in their masculine energy is really dysregulation, disguised as I'm just, like, really busy. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:So with the control and with that, like, I'm too much of my masculine. I need to get my feminine we could talk about feminine energy, but it's really more about healing those patterns inside of you, nervous system regulation, which I know you're so brilliant at teaching, and, you know, somatically being in a different place inside of ourselves so we're not wearing this mask that may appear masculine, but it's really more dysregulation.
Kate Northrup:Yes. And one of the things you bring so beautifully into that is inner child work and also internal family systems, IFS. And that's a body of work that I have benefited from hugely. I think it's actually quite intertwined with nervous system healing. Yes.
Kate Northrup:I think, fundamentally, it's actually the same thing in a in a way. Yeah. And so can you tell me more about how inner child work loops in Yeah. Around sort of dysregulated, controlling, hypervigilant behavior.
Christine Hassler:Well, this is great because it segues also to the other thing I was gonna say other than control in terms of the things that keep a really healthy partnership away is unresolved childhood stuff, which isn't a surprise to most people watching or listening. And so many women that we help in Be the Queen say, I've worked on myself. I've done all this work, and it still isn't happening. I'm, like, yes, you have. You totally have, and let's integrate it.
Christine Hassler:Let's let's really integrate the work so you're super conscious about how the subconscious patterns are playing out. So as children, we have really specific needs. Some are specific just to development. Like, if we look at Ericsson's stages of development, if we look at attachment theory, that that apply to everyone. There's certain needs that we all have.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. And there's needs that are unique to us. So, you know, for me, I had the developmental need as a toddler to exercise my autonomy. So did you. But for me specifically, I also was a highly sensitive kid.
Christine Hassler:I still am a highly sensitive person, a huge empath. Yeah. And I had different needs because of that. So, again, we're looking at just the needs that are universal and that are our own individual needs. And whatever needs weren't met, we subconsciously will go out and seek.
Christine Hassler:And the people we tend to do that with are people that remind us, consciously or subconsciously, mostly subconsciously, of our family of origin. And it's not so exact that, oh, I had emotionally unavailable dad. I'm a heterosexual woman, so I'm gonna attract an emotionally unavailable man. That's that happens all the time. You see that.
Christine Hassler:But it can be super subtle. You know? It can be more your relationship with your mom. It could be you never really felt like you belonged in a friend group, so there's an insecurity. And you will go after people that kinda make you feel insecure.
Christine Hassler:You'll go after a super confident person where you don't feel enough on some level. So it can come from a variety of places. So we really need to look at, okay, where is my inner child picking? Like, I realized there was a phase in my thirties where I was dating a certain type of person, same person, different face. And when I did some inner child work around it, I realized, oh my gosh, my 14 year old is picking.
Christine Hassler:My 38 year old is not dating right now at all. She's not involved. This is completely the 14 year old who was a late bloomer, who never felt the boys liked her, who just wanted the popular charming guy, and never felt like she was enough. And so that's who I was dating. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:And, like, my adult self, when the relationships would fall apart, I'd be like, why didn't I see that coming? Like, why did I even go after this?
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:And but it wasn't my present day self choosing. So that's why inner child work is so important because we bring we we meet those needs. We fig well, first, we figure out what the needs are. Yep. We figure out what the beliefs are that form from not getting those needs met, you know, what emotions never got to be expressed and released, help update those beliefs, understand which protective parts are working with the inner child to create things like sabotaging and people pleasing, all kinds of things in our life, and then meet those needs ourselves and find ways to get those needs met in our relationships in current day adult ways.
Christine Hassler:Amazing.
Kate Northrup:Absolutely amazing. And and I know that you actually walk people through doing that in in group settings.
Christine Hassler:Yes. We have an inner child course as well. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:Do you do you ever work with clients 1 on 1?
Christine Hassler:You do. I do.
Kate Northrup:You have 1 on 1 clients. That's so cool.
Christine Hassler:I always will. I feel like my first client was in 2,004, and I feel like, you know, if you're a comedian that never goes back and does, like, the small Totally. Stages, you know, it's just part of the craft.
Kate Northrup:You lose your edge. Yeah. So how did you find coaching? Because you were, like, way ahead of the curve on that.
Christine Hassler:It found me. It totally found me. So the insecure, never fit in, I hate Christine club, like, that part of me, the way she compensated was overachieving. And so I graduated high school early, I graduated college early, and I moved out to LA when I was 20, and got a job yeah. Got a job working in the entertainment industry.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. I thought I was I was 20 going on, like, 35. I thought, like, I look back, I'm like, I couldn't even legally drink. What was I doing? But I felt like I was just ready.
Christine Hassler:I went to college, couldn't wait to get out of there, hated high school, and just was ready to, like
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:Go prove myself. Yeah. And, got a job in the entertainment industry, was an agent, worked my way up, was the youngest ever female agent, and was dating the head of a movie studio, was going to Oscars and Golden Globes and private jets and celebrities and all the things, and I still wasn't happy. And I just PS, I had been on antidepressants since I was 11. And in my I can't remember when it was.
Christine Hassler:Maybe in my twenties, I threw in antianxiety meds like benzos as well. Mhmm. And that was just I just sort of thought that I needed you know, that was just part of Yeah. My story. And I just started realizing, wow.
Christine Hassler:Like, money and fame don't equal happiness. I don't like what I'm doing. I don't like this industry. It doesn't feel safe to me. I'm stressed out, and, like, what am I doing?
Christine Hassler:And so I quit my job. My fiance broke up with me. I was estranged from my family. I was not well with how I was treating my body, and financially, I was trying to keep up my fancy lifestyle when I was, like, working as a personal trainer and a hand model. I never knew you were
Kate Northrup:a hand model. I yeah. I love that factoid so much.
Christine Hassler:As a hand model. You do have nice hands. Thank you. Thank you. It's it's it's so great when you you go into, like, a body modeling agency, and they look at your whole body, and they're like, I'll take your hands.
Christine Hassler:I'm like, alright. Well, something.
Kate Northrup:That's I don't
Christine Hassler:know if it exists anymore because with Photoshop and, like, you know, probably don't even AI.
Kate Northrup:Who knows? You
Christine Hassler:don't even need AI.
Kate Northrup:I actually do know. I know one other hand mom. Yeah. Well, former.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. I mean, it was legit. I'd go in and, like 100%. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:I just don't know what with gloves to protect them?
Christine Hassler:You know, I didn't take it that seriously. I had, like, I had, like, 7 gigs, but, I mean, I think that's enough to count.
Kate Northrup:For sure. No one's ever paid me to take pictures of my hands. So Yes. Okay. So you were so you were pulling it together I was pulling
Christine Hassler:it together. Trainer, hand model, trying
Kate Northrup:to keep up your fancy life.
Christine Hassler:Trying to do it all and then just realized, like, traditional therapy wasn't working for me anymore. The guy I was dating at the time was an addict, so my codependent patterns were, like, doing well. And she told me why I went to see this life coach. I'm, like, a life coach? Like, what about what's that?
Christine Hassler:She's, like, I don't know. She's not a therapist. She's a little different. You see her in her house. Her name's Mona.
Christine Hassler:She lives in the valley, and I'm like, the valley? I'm not going to
Kate Northrup:You see her in her house. Her name's Mona. She lives in the valley. Yeah. Sign me up.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. I know. I'm like, you're right. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:Oh my god.
Christine Hassler:But I was I was really desperate, and she's not trusted my friend. I was like, alright. I'll go see Mona. So I drive over the hill to the valley. I was living in LA and knock on her door, and she opens and, like, no makeup, sweatpants.
Christine Hassler:Great. But just this beautiful energy, blonde hair, blue eyes like you, like, just this light. And I kinda didn't know what to do with her because I was used to more traditional buttoned up, we sit like this kind of things. And she's like, come on, I'll put you in JJ's room. JJ's her son, and I walk in.
Christine Hassler:It's race car bunk beds. And she's like, you sit there. And I was like,
Kate Northrup:oh my gosh. So good.
Christine Hassler:She read me. She was so into I say was because, unfortunately, she passed away at 50, like super young. Anyway, big loss for me. Like, one of my biggest biggest loss because I saw her for 14 years. Wow.
Christine Hassler:And she trained me, and, anyway, I'm jumping ahead to the story. But she was the first person, like, in a clinical clinical sense
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:That didn't look at me like I was broken. Wow. And that's something that has was such a life changing thing for me and something that I really feel, like, is my number one value as a coach Yeah. Is to be in that energy of compassion and non judgment and never I can have empathy for people Yeah. But never see them as broken.
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:And this is why so many coaches and therapists burn out because, subconsciously, they're seeing that, and they, like, overinvest, and they end up sympathizing and taking on stuff. And Mona really taught me how to be a channel and how to sit in love and how to see someone is not broken. Yeah. And, anyway, working with her, decided I wanna write a book about the 20 something experience, ended up getting a book deal at, like, 24, interviewed people for the book. They kept saying, aren't you a coach?
Christine Hassler:I was personal training at the time. People just wanted to talk to me. They didn't wanna work out. And so finally, I thought, well, maybe there's something here. Like, maybe I my mom was a therapist, so I always did not think that would
Kate Northrup:be my path.
Christine Hassler:And, not that I didn't wanna follow in her footsteps, but I thought I'd do something Yeah. Sure different. So I just was like, okay. Maybe this is what I was supposed to be doing. And I came to Mona, and I said because I was in my career crisis.
Christine Hassler:I was really trying to figure it out. And I said, I think I'm supposed to do what you do. I think I'm supposed to be a coach. And she goes, I know. And I said, why didn't you tell me?
Christine Hassler:She goes, that's not my job.
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:It's for you to figure it out. So she's like, now that you know, let's go. And she said, just a warning. If you say yes to this, your whole life is going to be learning. You are not gonna be able to stay asleep.
Christine Hassler:Are you ready permanently wake up? And I'm like, yes. And she's like, no. No. No.
Christine Hassler:Wait a minute. I'm asking you a really important question. Are you ready? And I was like, I think so. At the time, I had no idea what I was saying yes to, but I see now.
Kate Northrup:Are you ready to permanently wake up?
Christine Hassler:Yeah. She's like, you can't go back to sleep once you say yes to this, or you will be a fraud.
Kate Northrup:And there it is. I was like, oh, so you were 24? Yep. You were 24, and she trained you?
Christine Hassler:She trained me, and then I went to different life coaching programs. I got my master's from the University of Santa Monica in spiritual psychology and consciousness health and healing, and then I was on faculty there. I've sat at and, you know, different teachers. Like, I've sat at the feet of masters, people that, you know, aren't instafamous. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Yeah. Well, we live in such a weird time right now with social media where anyone can with good marketing skills and good photo shoots Exactly. Make it seem like anything, and it's weird. Yep.
Kate Northrup:And, I'm just curious, like, having been at this for a long time and having quite a depth of training, having trained hundreds of coaches yourself
Christine Hassler:Mhmm.
Kate Northrup:What are some of the things that you see out there that as consumers, we should be keeping an eye out for, that are not the best coaching practices? Yeah.
Christine Hassler:You know, I was at an event last week with Dean Grazioso and Tony Robbins, and Dean was talking about how, for so long, people wanted aspiration, but now they're really looking for direction. So, like, people wanted to get on the Titanic and, like, have a great time and have an amazing room, but now they want lifeboats. Like, they want the actual real deal and the actual how to. And I think what happened with so much of the influencer and, specifically, coaching industry is it became very aspirational. It became very, like, you can help millions of people.
Christine Hassler:You can do it from Volley. Like, you can you know? And and it became about how many people you could help. I'm putting help in quotes.
Kate Northrup:Mhmm.
Christine Hassler:Basically, how many people you get to follow you
Kate Northrup:Mhmm.
Christine Hassler:Versus, like, what's the actual work you're doing? A, inside yourself
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:And, b, like, how are you actually serving people? And so what I've seen in the coaching industry is a desire to be big, a desire to make a lot of money, a desire to make a lot of impact, but people often define that as, like, having a lot of followers. And, like, what does impact really mean? And so and I'm not saying that's true for all coaches. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:But I see that trend in the industry. And I think what people the consumer is starting to realize is, like, I want someone I can relate to. Sure. I want some aspiration. Like, I never would high I personally would never hire a coach whose life I don't want.
Christine Hassler:You know? Like Agree. Absolutely. Like, there is some degree of aspiration to it. But when it seems like I'm way up here, and I'm gonna look down and help you way down here, it it always has felt like a mismatch to me.
Christine Hassler:And so I think it's very important to feel a resonance with someone, to feel like like, how I want people to feel with me is we're on the same path. I'm just a little bit farther along, and I'm gonna, you know, help you.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Like, hey. There's a root over there, and, like, watch out at the switchback because, you know,
Christine Hassler:there's a route. Step in that pothole. Yeah. Exactly.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. Totally.
Christine Hassler:Exactly. Exactly. And so I think when we're for anyone looking to join a program or hire a coach, like, really ask yourself, like, how does my body feel with this person? Do I feel safe? Even if
Kate Northrup:you're not big one.
Christine Hassler:It's a that's the number one one. Yeah. You know, even if you're not physically in their room with them, you know, like, through video or someone's Instagram, like, do you feel like you could walk up to that person and be like, hi, and introduce yourself and not feel less than in any way? Yes. That is so big.
Christine Hassler:Huge. Huge. And the the tendency I see of people, like, wanting a quick fix, it's starting to actually go away. People are really realizing, actually, there isn't a quick fix. Like, this whole human thing, it's one big course.
Christine Hassler:It's one big school. Yeah. And the stuff you're teaching and the stuff that that I teach as well about, like, really not rehashing our past for years years years years, but healing it. Yep. Bringing, you know, that inner child and all parts of us into the present, learning how to regulate ourselves, learning how to update our beliefs.
Christine Hassler:And and most savvy consumers know that isn't a quick fix. Yep. And that no one's gonna do that for them. So it's really looking for the people that are gonna empower you to become your own best coach, really to, like, teach you the tools how to empower yourself.
Kate Northrup:I love that. And then on the other side, because I know we have people who listen in who are coaches
Christine Hassler:Yes.
Kate Northrup:What are some of the things that we could be asking ourselves? I don't identify as a coach. I never was trained as a coach specifically, though I have a 100,000,000 trainings
Christine Hassler:Yes.
Kate Northrup:Of certain kinds. So but I I'm in this industry. Yeah. So what are some of the things that we could be doing or asking ourselves to make sure that we are really delivering at a level of integrity, at a level of value that is in alignment with who we really are.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. Well, first of all, I've seen you not coach people. You're amazing. So I don't know what you wanna call it, but you definitely have
Kate Northrup:Don't know what I would call it.
Christine Hassler:But that ability. Oops.
Kate Northrup:Thank you. I hit the microphone.
Christine Hassler:You you definitely know how to ask amazing questions and reflect things back to people in a really loving, resonant way. I've experienced it myself, and I've seen you do it with people. So it's definitely part of who you are and how you serve. In terms of coaches, so anyone asking that question, like, you're you're in the right place. Like, you're off to a great start.
Christine Hassler:Like, just a good point.
Kate Northrup:It reminds me of, I think Glennon Doyle shared as she was, like, speaking at a a parenting conference and all the, of course, anxious moms are, like, asking her these questions. She was like, listen.
Christine Hassler:Yeah.
Kate Northrup:If you're here, like, you're good.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. Yeah.
Kate Northrup:You don't even need to be worrying about it because your your kids are in great hands if you're at a parenting conference.
Christine Hassler:Exactly. Yeah. Because you actually care. Yeah. Totally.
Christine Hassler:If you're asking yourself, like, am I, you know, am I in integrity? You probably are. Yeah. I think where sort of what I see is kind of these 2 polarities, the kind the, like, being a little much too much in our ego, a little too much of the, like, look at me. I'm an influencer.
Christine Hassler:And that whole archetype over here where we're not asking, am I actually connecting? Am I actually serving, or am I making people feel worse by, like, being over here showing there's kind of a show off energy sometimes that I see. And, again, this can sound really judgmental and critical, but, actually, I'm coming from an observant place of just what I see and what I've had a lot of people report back to me about, like, being on social media and following people that should make them feel better, but then they just kinda feel worse. Yeah. And then there's this other extreme of people that really have huge hearts and are the empaths and are the highly sensitive people and deal with impostor syndrome.
Christine Hassler:Mhmm. And actually need more ego, like, need need more of the, like, I do have a mission. I am here. Like, I know that my voice matters. So where we wanna be is in the middle, you know, or even just off that spectrum completely and more in a Yeah.
Kate Northrup:I love that. Yes. Totally.
Christine Hassler:More in a in a balanced place of, you know, what are the unique gifts that wanna express through me? What are the experiences I've had in my life and also the unique talents and gifts that I have that could serve people Yeah. And that will serve people? And how does that wanna express through me? You know, when I train coaches, I always say, don't do it like me or anybody else because it won't work.
Christine Hassler:Right. It won't work. You we can maybe model, like, strategies and funnels and those types of things, but in terms of our essence, it really is that needs to be so authentic. Mhmm. Because I think people it's not a thing.
Christine Hassler:I know people's BS meters are going way up.
Kate Northrup:They are, which is good. Very good. I think it's good because it it will bring out, like, a a a a truth and a resonance in the industry that is that's good for everybody.
Christine Hassler:Yes.
Kate Northrup:What do you think? Somebody asked me this question the other week, and, they said, like, how can I be in integrity out here coaching when, like, I'm only a couple of steps? Like, I haven't created every single thing I want. I'm I'm maybe only 1 or 2 steps ahead of my ideal client, and, honestly, I think the sort of ahead thing is a bit of an illusion anyway, but you know what I'm saying. Like, just in some sort of framework.
Kate Northrup:What do you recommend for people who are getting started early days in coaching, who are struggling with that imposter syndrome, maybe are feeling like, oh, no. My life and my business are not perfect. Do I even deserve to be supporting anyone in their journey?
Christine Hassler:Yeah. Well, that conversation reveals a limiting belief about what our job as coaches are. Yes. I love that. If we believe our job as coaches is to tell people how to do things, to me, that's not the essence of coaching.
Christine Hassler:Our job as coaches is to hold a really safe space for people, to have lots of compassion and understanding, and to ask really great questions, and to understand someone's model of the world. Like, even if, let's say, even if you have the business and the life and whatever, the way you did it may not apply at all to the person you're coaching. So caveat, if someone is coming specifically for business coaching and they're coming to you and saying, Have you done this? And that's specifically what they're looking for, then you're probably not the right fit. But in most coaches that I know that wanna start out really coaching people, helping people unpack their limiting beliefs, helping people understand where their thoughts are getting in their way, helping people see how their past may still be impacting their present, And and most of all, just really creating a safe container for people to be seen and heard.
Christine Hassler:Like, we cannot underestimate the power of that. I think sometimes there's this expectation as a coach you're supposed to have these zingers that you just, like, drop, and you're supposed to just, you know, know the answer and tell people what to do. And that can be powerful. Sure. And what's more powerful is holding not more, but just what's powerful as well is holding a loving space for someone to come to their own answers.
Christine Hassler:But if we're too caught up in, like, imposter syndrome, or I'm not this, or I'm not that, then we're actually gonna be in our own head Right. Too much, and we're not gonna serve well.
Kate Northrup:Well, it actually comes back to the beginning of our conversation around control
Christine Hassler:Mhmm. Exactly.
Kate Northrup:And surrender. Yep. I mean, it really seems like it's the same skill set Yep. To trust that some and and connecting to somebody and relating to them at the level of their power and their wholeness Yep. As opposed to trust as opposed to relating to somebody at the at the level of a problem or brokenness.
Kate Northrup:Well, the whole, like,
Christine Hassler:you know, I'm not here. Can I coach people? When I first started, I was 24, something like that. And, you know, Mona said to me because I have the same question. She's, like, just coach people in their twenties.
Christine Hassler:Just coach people that are going through their quarter life crisis. You've gotten to the other side of yours. You have some wisdom about it. Like, stick to what you know. You know?
Christine Hassler:And before I had a kid, like, if someone said, I really want someone to coach me on parenting, I could do some of that. But until I had the actual experience, like, it I I there was a lot I didn't know I didn't even know. Yes.
Kate Northrup:Which brings me to what I wanted to say. And I'm curious about this because my current coach has been my coach since 2016.
Christine Hassler:Wow. That's a long time.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. She's amazing. And, she's not a mom, and yet I have become such a better parent Oh, I'm sorry. From being coached by her, which is really interesting. So it's a perfect example of what you were saying Yep.
Kate Northrup:That, like first of all, I actually do have a coach that I go to every now and again when it's, like, a very specific parenting issue. That's different. But globally Yes. My healing work with her, I am a I am like a way better mother Absolutely. Even though she's not a mother, and I think it's just exhibits what you were saying that, like, people aren't coming to you necessarily for, like, tell me exactly how.
Kate Northrup:I mean, that's more of a consultant or a strategist versus a coach. She holds space for my healing Exactly. And asks brilliant questions and mirrors back and helps me see, you know, when I'm being the we should call it the wounded daughter. Yeah. So that I can raise girls who are Yeah.
Kate Northrup:More connected to themselves, like, I suppose I would say. Yeah. So I wanted to just share that, and then you're obviously very psychic because you started talking about parenting. Do you think that that really helps as a coach cultivating your connection with your intuition? Yes.
Kate Northrup:And how have you done that?
Christine Hassler:Listening. I really, truly, the way that I've developed my intuition is not trying to come up with the answer. And this is something when we train coaches, I see this so often is I see them in a session, and they're listening, but they're also thinking about how they're gonna respond. And this is true for any communication, not just coaching, but especially in coaching. And this is where, like, imposter syndrome can really get in the way and self confidence can get in the way.
Christine Hassler:And what I really have always done as a coach is try to get myself out of it as much as I can and really be open and really just listen and be available and and trust when stuff comes through. Yeah. Like, really, really trust that. And it's it's definitely something I've developed over over time. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:And, you know, one way it doesn't develop is not responding to it. You know? Like, hearing something or getting something and not sharing it
Kate Northrup:or not
Christine Hassler:taking action. Not just coaching sessions. Yeah. That's weird. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. But actually being like, wow. This is this feels like something we should listen to. So when
Kate Northrup:we use it, the channel gets stronger. Is that what I'm hearing you say? Absolutely. Okay. That's so good.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. That's so good. Christine, this is amazing, and I really feel like this conversation was about surrendering control and, like, leaning into love and trust. Yeah. Is there anything, like, final words you would wanna pass along to someone listening around that particular invitation?
Christine Hassler:Well, I think I mean, my my biggest message, and this so much comes from my story, is you're not broken, and there's nothing wrong with you. And I can tell you, I have coached I don't even know how many, thousands and thousands, tens of thousands. I don't even know a lot. Yeah. And I have yet to meet one person who has thought, there's nothing wrong with me.
Christine Hassler:I'm totally great. Like, unless they're completely in denial, there is this sense of, like, I'm not enough. I'm broken. There's something wrong with me. It can be really subtle, or it can be really overt.
Christine Hassler:So I just want people to know that's a human condition. Like, we all feel our flavor of it on some way or another. And the biggest spiritual practice I've had, even more than surrender, is acceptance. Like, I talked about my worry thing. Can I tell you how much money and time I've tried to spend changing it?
Christine Hassler:It's been so much easier to go, oh, there's me worrying again. Yeah. I must really care about this. Wow. This must really mean something to me.
Christine Hassler:Okay. What do I wanna do with this worry? Instead of being like, oh, worry. I need to make it go away. Like, what book do I need to read?
Christine Hassler:Do I need ketamine? Like, what
Kate Northrup:do I need to do? For sure, ketamine. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:For sure. That will solve everything. Yeah. So just coming to a place of and this is so great for our relationships too. You know, one of the reasons that I don't get triggered by certain people I love the Ram Dass quote quote, if you think you're evolved, go home for Thanksgiving, is accepting who people are.
Christine Hassler:Like, when my husband doesn't doesn't put the dry dishes away before he stacks more wet ones on top of them.
Kate Northrup:That's me in our marriage.
Christine Hassler:We would never live together. Our friendship would be over.
Kate Northrup:Mike is also a Virgo. So
Christine Hassler:Mike and I need to have a support
Kate Northrup:This feels really familiar. You can text him about the dishes.
Christine Hassler:These are dry. Why are you putting wet ones on top of them? It's like They'll dry eventually altogether. Oh my god. And it's just like more chaos.
Christine Hassler:I don't understand. I'd love to live in your world for just a day. I probably have a lot. You know, I could just leave the dishes stacked on the sink.
Kate Northrup:You think there's more surrender.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. Yeah. There's more surrender available. Yeah. But my my point, other than revealing my own rigidity
Kate Northrup:is I mean, it is logical.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. It it seems logical. But my point in that is I can look at that and go, so annoying. Like or I can just be like, that stuff being stuff. Yeah.
Christine Hassler:Like, he's being consistent. Or when a family member is doing their thing, do I get dysregulated? Do I allow the same inner child trigger to come up, or I do I go, that's them being them?
Kate Northrup:Yeah.
Christine Hassler:Now, again, I wanna make the distinction between toxic abusive behavior and someone just having their quirks and their patterns and whatever it is because this over here, we need to remove ourself from and have firm boundaries about. But things inside ourself and things, you know, in other people that are more just sort of those just sort of kinda ways we are, ways someone are, they're not gonna change. If we can come to acceptance, it just makes everything a lot easier because nothing heals in judgment. Things only heal and shift in love. If we're judging ourselves or anyone else, it's not gonna shift.
Christine Hassler:But if we can love and acceptance to me is an expression of love, if we can really accept ourselves and others, then actual transformation can happen.
Kate Northrup:So powerful. Thank you, Christine. This has been so wonderful. Pleasure. For being here.
Christine Hassler:So fast. I know. My goodness.
Kate Northrup:I know. Where can people come find you to connect and learn more?
Christine Hassler:Well, Christine Hassler is my website. Great. I need to update it. It's perfect. It's perfect the way it is.
Christine Hassler:It's one of my priority lists. And then Instagram, I'm on sometimes. Yep. You know, pretty consistent there. And the best place is my podcast.
Christine Hassler:So over and on with it, I've had it for nearly 10 years. Yeah. Close to 10 years. And I coach people live on the air. When I was thinking about service, you know, to coach with me now privately is an investment.
Kate Northrup:And I
Christine Hassler:was like, well, how do I what kind of free product can I offer people on a consistent basis that basically is like coaching with me? And I was like, well, I'm just gonna coach people live on the air. And I had so many people in the industry say, don't do that. That's gonna be hard. People aren't gonna be vulnerable.
Christine Hassler:You know what I mean? Like, I had so many people try to tell me not to do it, and I was like, no. This feels good. Like, I see in group settings how much people learn watching someone else get coached because their defenses are down. So much gets into the subconscious.
Kate Northrup:Yes. That theta brain state, wild.
Christine Hassler:It's so wild, and it's so it's so receptive. Yeah. And so I was like, I'm gonna do this. So I coach people. I have interviews as well on Saturdays.
Christine Hassler:You've been on it. Thank you. But I coach people live on the air unscripted, unproduced, and so it's a great way to be a fly on the wall for a coaching session. We cover everything. There's nothing we haven't covered.
Kate Northrup:Yeah. And to receive the abundance that someone else is receiving, like, it's for all of us. It really, like, breaks down the lie of separation.
Christine Hassler:Yeah. And the vulnerability people share, like, it's just beautiful. So great.
Kate Northrup:Okay. Amazing. So all that'll be in the show notes. I really appreciate you. Oh,
Christine Hassler:I appreciate you so much. Thank you.
Kate Northrup:I'm teaching a brand new productivity training called plenty of time, and in it, we're gonna uncover the 3 mainstream productivity hacks that are keeping you overwhelmed, distracted, stressed, and busy unnecessarily, and what to do instead. To get yourself signed up for this free live event that is only happening one time this year, head over to kate northrup.comforward/time.