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One belladonna cocktail. Wrong hand. A tongueless Kwan-shiri assassin draws steel across the ballroom as Vena's plan unravels around Lagertia's lips. Then the Hegemon himself saunters in, flicks gold at their dead, calls the whole revolution pathetic — and leaves them staring at a trail that runs through a dying grandfather nobody mentioned.
Website: https://www.narrativedeclaration.com
System: Pathfinder Second Edition
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What is Rotgrind - Narrative Declaration?
Five adventurers try to survive in this comedy filled Pathfinder Second Edition TTRPG campaign within the grim dark world of Tyne. Follow the show, get custom TTRPG content, and more at https://narrativedeclaration.com
are you all excited for another amazing episode of rot grind no oh yeah oh wait we're meant to
scream the bed's gone oh it's just a big rectangle on audacity
when your waveform looks like a solid wall it's time to start all over again
i don't know i think the audience is really going to appreciate it actually
yeah it's okay chat screen for us already welcome back everybody to another amazing episode of rock
grind i want to introduce you to the amazing players that bring you this show where we play
pathfinder second edition and we suffer long in it starting off with odoroshi hi hello uh i'm odo uh
i am going to be playing uh vena the sylph swashbuckler the artist formerly known as volley
uh and uh my my my veggie tail sauna is spinach uh just if you even care oh this is our bit is it
okay is it is it is it like boiled or is it like the we're in i'm gonna go for a walk around the
block i'll see you guys later okay next up we have the ever stalwart hulky crow that is me i am hulky
crow today i will be playing the ever resolute and always chaotic rohua the cleric the kanwasu
cleric and my veggie tail sauna is a romanesco broccoli because i am fractal turgid and constantly
spiraling in on myself of course that's a lot of good verbs yeah yeah the adjectives i've never had
a romanesco i wonder if it looks around is it clear i'm about to hold a gun to you get on with it the one
holding the gun to me is erindale i uh i've got a gun uh no i'm gonna put that down now oh yeah i'm
playing as uh baldrick weathers the alchemist and uh i'm looking forward to continuing this stuff and
not the veggie tales discussion but knowing that speaker is going to come up with something to say
after this to countermand me as he always does i look at him i i point at him there's the one he is
looking at is he ever is the ever mystified speaker d hi guys i'm speaker d i'm the original veggie
tales fan i love all veggie tales media um all the all the books the comics uh i know all the lore
i know everything about veggie tales and i will be playing um tan hauser who is this is less important
but he is a magus he's an android he's a revolutionary you know all about him but what's more important is
that if i were a veggie tale i believe that i would be an artichoke thank you
and of course we have uh ever illusionary gang master the one who will make us all suffer
thurston hillman illusionary like i'm not real
you're not you're not okay well i really love that or azoran never introduces himself it's very
funny no one ever knows what you're playing no one ever asks who i am i have to do it why do i
have who are you wait a second are you like so here's always the weird thing i've actually had
people like um like message me and stuff going zorn why don't you just let them introduce themselves
and you just have to tell them well there's an order and also since we're online doing stuff
there's lag and then sometimes people forget their order so it gets disjointed so that's why i do it
and i mostly go like mostly go for odo hulky arendale speaker because you're in the order of
the overlay that we have on twitch and stuff and then i skip me and go to thurston because i go last
because i then either fill people in on what's going on after and all that stuff so it's kind of
weird to go i'm this then it's thurston then it goes back to me so it just makes more natural just
be like i do this and here's all the updates of what's been happening you know or like give people
notice you twice he's got a good point and we still don't know what your vegetal so also wait
if you end on wait no zorn if you end on thurston then that just means he can get right into telling
us what we're doing yeah but sometimes people need to know what's what what's what you know any
updates or tell people going like hey they could watch on twitch or there's podcast i mean there's
tons of people who will watch till like episode 30 something and go i never knew there was a podcast
even though we mentioned it like 50 times it's a huge it's a weird thing you have to keep saying
it corals people will not listen guys there's a podcast oh i'll fucking choke you i'll hang you
like that my daylight anyway thurston's here to make us suffer hi thurston hi sorry i've just been
fallen into the deep hole of veggie tales stop raging all right all right the bit's over i'm
officially thurston i'm officially tired of it move on hi my name's thurston i'm gming
fun game today oh fucking hit i'm gonna all are you like we're really on it today guys
yeah yeah you're on it all right you're on it all right on my fucking nerves
my my nergal team is not doing fucking well right now i'm taking an emotional beating
had a lot of star players been fucking killed or taken out i'm just trying to get over some shit
right now get into this is that your trauma today fucking afforded a rot spot for my team his name
was the bold figure and then he fucking got a niggling injury and like the first god anyways
hi yeah i'm looking forward to this it's gonna be fun i'm gonna die thank you for the soundboard
now we're gonna be right strong now we're great now beetlejuice has all of our money
anyway i'm zorn the bear i play oran the strix druid and uh i am your i am your host i'm your host for
this evening um basically as an update we are if you are new to the streams is that we do highly
encourage you come over to the live streams if you're watching this on youtube but of course
twitch is here people on live can can mess with us do funny stuff by donating bits they've increased
our bit bars that's the bars down below that help us get hero points and all sorts of stuff but
remember just like as auto didn't remember we do have a podcast obviously youtube channel all that
types of stuff if you're watching the youtube channel and stuff or going on our website
narrative declaration.com you'll find everything patreon stuff campaign assets art all that stuff
to help out the show but thurston what adventure do you have for us today well i was gonna ask who
wants to recap last session get a fancy hero point uh odo and hulky don't have any it'll be good for
you two to do it maybe wait hold on we've already done it i thought we were going down the list i was
voluntold last time sorry
wait i was too i didn't do a good fucking job i think all right i got it i'm on the ball then
i'll take an extra hero point thurston are you yeah bogart the hero points bring it on baldrick
weathers all right so what happened last time was we had received an invitation from a delightful
gilded skeleton he came up to the door like he's like hey you want to come they didn't say anything
but he came up to us and offered us the invitation to the party there was a large party being
held by some rather prestigious individuals in regards to uh what was the name of the i'm sorry
names are the part where i fall apart who was the uh the person who invited us again thurston i remember
the rough like what's the word i remember are you talking about sandal deckland the no i was talking
throwing it yeah okay okay okay oh you uh i see i see i see you're looking for the uh the chamberlain's
name is that correct yes thank you uh yeah so in this instance let me just pull up my my things here
um as i you know yeah you got to get those visual aids ready so they know what we're talking about
yeah yeah let me gotta i gotta pull it up here because it's i'll i'll get to sans it it's in a
prior session i'm pulling it up i always love when i i try to get like like some music kind of go in
the background like very minor you know this thing as you guys are like where the fuck's this shit
like all these horns are now blaring chamberlain and nathian there you go yes chamberlain and nathian
we were we nathian invited us to a soiree where a number of interesting individuals would be
at and so we we strove to look our best we went out and acquired some rather foppish and dandy clothes
to arrive at the gala with and uh upon arriving we uh first we came across our good friend and
compatriot who i can't seem to find where's the where's our friends list where's our friends list
please tell me opens up brought your friends list oh yeah dina neeson yes we came across her in a
side room chatting with an older woman who did not fucking like us at all because old women don't
like us we're too young as you know and we uh we proceeded to enter into the party after which we
all fanned out about the room to try and get an idea of what exactly the purpose of all this was what we
could learn about well anyone here because we also found our good friend the uh oh the guild the
tyrant's guild person whose name escapes me because this was several weeks ago already
who is who would give us the rank again first infillium vadir there you go darth vader vader
yeah darth vader you're fighting darth vader no yeah infillium vadir was the the ranking individual
from the tyrant's guild yeah they're here and they are inspecting a delightful statue uh that was
actually a piece of equipment taken from the perfectite siege tower out in the swamps of the
solitude which we helped the denise and fine and now it's likely irking rahua to no end that they're
just kind of sitting around the room we also met uh a particularly fascinating an individual named after
a shoe sandal deckland and uh he's pretty something he's a large man he's a little lecherous so
naturally auto gravitated towards this guy here who who was introduced to us as indicated on the object
here as punchable man it's a very very good use of it uh and we've just been kind of schmoozing and
introducing ourselves around the room to various people the party split up at this point we're just kind of
uh mingling and not trying to grab too much attention and we basically left off in the midst of that as we
were taking part in uh conversation by combat or combat by conversation because you're having us go
about this in turns and making checks and it's been uh really great oh yeah that's right i'm talking to
this dude moral pam more help him and it's he's uh very interesting and he is
definitely someone i would talk to in my spare time thirst and also also uh dankwart's here he's
playing the piano for some reason he's just there we'll see in a minute oh yes i'm sorry i don't remember
every individual person regrettably the great punkle tomt punk punkle compt ponsel tomt
punkle compt he was the uh the the snake oil salesman oh yeah the snake oilsman who uh
oh who got put on him that was tanhauser wasn't it yes tanhauser gets to talk to a man that he
definitely wants to talk to as well everyone gets to talk to people they want to talk to yes pop
open a cold one popping open a cold one with the great ponsel compt yeah rahua went over to talk to
the infilium voli went or excuse me veena went over to go talk to uh sandal deckland i'm talking to
morel pan and tanhauser is talking to uh ponkel compt and orrin is just kind of satelliting around and
looking around and he caught a glimpse of yeah exactly he caught a glimpse of the hegemon through a uh
through a crack in the doorway or i guess through a sighting through a nearby alcove
and so we're kind of piecing together that well at least orrin is that maybe something's a little up
but we'll have to get to that because that's roughly where we left off last time i believe correct
absolutely you may uh bestow upon baldrick an extra hero thank you for the help with the names the names
are really where i fall flat i remember roughly what we were doing and all that it's just the names
the names jimmy i'm right there with you dude i'm trying to cut off all these handout cards as it's
like i feel like a detective going all right we got rid of these shuffling
where we specifically left off last session was each of you had sort of come back to the entrance
and we're having a little a little little gathering a little discussion time
uh to decide your next moves and that is where we're going to start today
orange looks everyone i want to murder
all right you're going to have to be more specific
no we're not we're not doing that right now at all now so quiet let me do it later
oh
an opportunity that to murder someone that has it coming that we shouldn't at least consider now
then before we get talking about that let's talk about what intelligence we've been able to gather so far
all right well in terms of uh sandal our good our good friend over there on the couch
i haven't been able to glean a ton but i can tell exactly what his
weak points are i can tell he's definitely
perhaps a bit undue uh a bit too proud of his connections to things that are a bit shady and with the right
prodding i think he'll spill everything do we have any idea what in particular he's connected to
from the way i understand it uh given what the infilia or not the infillium the the chamberlain told us
he's going to have something to do with the stuff that the medics guild was doing out in the swamp
indeed that's the same information i got from ponselcomt who himself seems to be a grifter of some
description he has access to no doubt some snake oil that he's been peddling off as a miracle
i intend to deal with him later for now it seems the fat man is more worthy of our attentions
did anyone else obtain information
uh baldrick will kind of nod his assent yeah i was talking to the fellow over at the bar over there
uh moral pam more help him uh apparently he's also the head of the uh farmer's guild i believe
right and i'm looking to thirst him for this one that's what the name is right yeah the farmer's
guild yes yeah so he's a he's the leader of the farmer's guild naturally he's a little bit more
well-to-do than a lot of this but i mean couldn't really guess that from always carrying himself but
regardless uh he seems to have an inkling about who was throwing this party which is specifically
you know sandal he's gonna just kind of waggle a finger over it uh sandal declin
what first remind me again what did i pick up last time because again we it's been a while since we did
this um yeah okay so you had spoken with more hell and learned a little bit uh particularly uh you
learned that sandals kind of like the heir apparent uh to the declin family uh his parents had passed
away in some event and so he is set to inherit from his uh grandfather um and his grandfather's kind
of like shacked up in in the the family manor um that that was kind of the the little bits and bobs
you've been able to piece together from talking to more hell pam just a bit
so yeah he's the uh heir apparent to the declin fortune so doesn't doesn't surprise me he's a nepo
baby he has the uh the air about him moral had some uh well it's rumors mostly but he's
seemed convinced that his inheritance was not exactly naturally timed thinks he uh
took care of his parents
supposedly just a rumor not like it really much matters in this case that's mostly just rumors
well i think with the right bit of flattery and the right buttons to push i might be able to get him to
brag about some crimes that shouldn't come out he doesn't seem to be all that discreet about it
so then what's our next step we have the butcher's guild on one hand we have a grifter on the other
and then we have someone with information we actually care to know in the presence of a member of the
tyrant's guild
we need to find out where this connection with the medic's guild goes
where to strike where to find what we have been tasked with finding
seems to me the best person to talk to in that regard would be sandal
is there any chance we could get him alone doubtful
he is surrounded by a bunch of sycophants doesn't seem keen on leaving that couch
what if the party was ruined
ruined what's your idea well we obviously can't pull out our swords and start massacring the rich
and wealthy no no no we're not far enough in the revolution for that but what we can do
is make it to where the party seems stale everyone will be forced to move to another location
and into the intervening chaos we can take our prize that is assuming we can't coax out the words with
some well-placed manipulations but i would say that if rotten meat started drifting through the
air vents or perhaps all of the alcohol suddenly went off at once
something awkward and embarrassing that socialites would care about like murder well no not like
murder yeah yeah we might stop we might have a i did learn something important and we might actually
have a sycophant who who may be in line with killing everybody here oh wait really that's way better than
my plan yeah i and rahua will very obviously turn around to point at anfilium vidir
yeah they they said they want to kill everybody in the room
oh okay
well that's probably more of a metaphor than a direct uh declaration of intent
i don't mean they are going to kill everybody overtly but they they were pretty clear about what
they wanted to do all right i'm going to cut you off there rahua i don't really want to work with
the tyrants guild even a sycophant like that on any level so that's that's a kibosh on that we can
think of something else i agree with that the tyrants guild are useful to manipulate but i do not want to be
their pawn oh also they know exactly who we are well yes i would be insulted if they didn't
hmm regardless uh hang on i think i might have an idea mentioned ways of making a party sound stale
and boring right that's right without making it obvious that it's us that did it no no no see i got
an idea he's gonna point over at uh the individual playing the piano
i think hey thurston could i possibly make a knowledge check of some kind to know if there's a
tune that nobility might find distasteful that can be played on the piano oh yeah there's like you
give me a society check for that that would be appropriate i'll give it a shot here's the first
world of the day folks they're playing wonderwall decent 27 yeah yeah yeah yeah uh very very much
wonderwall absolutely you want to get you want to wing something or should i make it up after you
you can you can you can come up with some awful thing that the nobility despises here baldrick
all right so i was actually i've drifted in the circles around here long enough especially been in
college long enough to know that there's a particular tune that causes some nobles to
chafe it was played uh long while ago uh history books nonsense but it's a well-known tune uh
arcad's juggling act you can play it on the piano like that one but uh suffice to say it was played at a
great many beheadings uh well what's not to like about that well if you're a noble it's probably not
probably a bad reminder if you wanted i could try and get their attention like a distraction or something
and then you could probably go up to him playing the keyboard up there and then i don't know bribe
him or convince him make give him a change to his uh his work see if he knows anything about arcad's
juggling act i imagine that'll make them a bit uncomfy this is not a bad idea an orrin yeah you can
transform into animal yeah he's now scared have you ever i grab him by the shoulder
have you ever transformed into a skunk a couple times why don't you find a way to crawl into these
air vents crawl above this party turn into a skunk and then i don't know what it is
skunks don't shit i'm sorry goo everywhere got it yeah there's a musk everywhere i don't think that's
the term the goo watch out for the goo whoopsie doo here comes the goo not the goo glab how do skunks
it's a spray smell bad all right we'll look look at dan how do you go uh yeah uh uh can i roll a
perception check to see if there are any vents around as he's like looking left and right to
find anything yeah sure give me a perception check excellent with the plus 16 i roll the dice
it tumbles and bones and that's not that 28 28 28 okay so there aren't like there's some like
ventilation holes but like there's not like duct work in the city so like you don't have any kind
of like immediate die hard uh vents or whatnot but like there's places to maneuver through some of the
walls any of them chunk sized yes okay uh he looks at tan hairs going you're gonna have to throw me to
one of them i take a look and i realize that we are surrounded by curtains yes is there any chance
you could crawl amongst the curtains i'm gonna have to make so many athletic checks i'm gonna die
i can haste you if it will help i can haste me too i'll still die oh yeah that horrible look
and he looks at tanhouser like super serious like he was finally given a purpose in life like a secret
agent mission he goes got it mr tanhouser i'll stink up the place all right i believe in you
now give me one moment come with me oren the rest of you find people to endear yourselves with
once this happens and the party disintegrates what's our next move
well the next next move is that sandal declin no well at the very least sandal declin shut up no
at the very least we need to get him on his own and we need to get him to confess to what is going
on with the medics guild i think that we can start prodding him start inflating his ego and i think that
enough people gassing him up can get him to brag about the things that he's done at the very least
enough to say bring back the information to the the chamberman yes but we need to make sure he
doesn't rest control of the party once we scatter it i look at baldrick baldrick what you make
disgusting concoctions all the time thanks perhaps you could poison his drink make him feel ill then when
the smell infiltrates the place he might vomit throw up become more visibly sick at that point he will
likely attempt to excuse himself for certain from festivities rather than attempt to party hard
while his entire body convulses in endless unfollowable pain
that might be overkill at the theater you really should have seen it yes well something perhaps less
extreme than that
what do you understand yes i think that bad music and a bit of a stink will be more than enough to send a
bunch of nobles on their way very well now then while our two operatives gauge with their actions
what shall us three be doing well one i think we should have eyes on uh the hegemon
it doesn't sit well with me that he's here and that he's not socializing and i don't know frankly the
guy gives me the willies oh yes you'll have to be dealt with in time no doubt and i think that at
least whichever whoever of us are the best at talking uh this is vena's way of saying is anybody here
trained in any sort of diplomacy anyone i'm trained in terror tactics or only has a plus one to diplomacy
i got my plus one i think i think regrettably that is you it's just me it's just me well if anybody
would like to assist with whatever social skills the rest of this group can manage to scrape together
have any of you ever spoken to people just in general have you heard spoken to people
i've spoken with people previously but they're mostly very mean patrons ah well food service will do
that oh food service is hell don't ever work it do not worry vena i tan hauser will help you in this
social encounter i'm just imagining tan hauser salivating through his mouthpiece you know what tanning
that's that's a great thought we're gonna put a pin in that one maybe you should go and check out
what the hegemen is doing i i would trust nobody else to particularly um a deal with a man like that
the small one's doing something he points over where is he comped he's he's wazing to us
what is it that you require oh hi hi there i just stood up for about a lot of talking yeah i just had
a little little drinky poo and i think it went a bit through me oh boy okay oh yeah clear clear the way
we're kind of in the door wait i want to roll insight on this guy it's not a skill yeah well i
want to i want to roll the thing where i figure out if he's hiding something perception perception
excellent you see we got there i just gotta find how how is it that i have lost perception
my god there it is uh clean your eyes there you go ah with a natural two there's no doubt i've
discovered all the secrets uncle cop staggers by and seems to depart out the front
but that was weird well when you gotta go you gotta go anyway
i'm going to walk uh like look side to side
who was serving his drinks did anyone see did i see from my previous uh encounter encounter who was
handing him his drinks counter counter because i was talking i'm gonna stop talking like this because
i was talking to poncel comp um uh you saw that he had some there you you didn't see who exactly
was serving them if anything it's probably came from like the bartender like she's been going out
back and forth a bit i'm just gonna march over to the poncel comp table give me a moment i have a hunch
i gotta walk over to poncel comp's table hello friends hello don't hello and i'm going to reach down and
i'm going to grab his drink that he was drinking assuming it's still here okay um you can see that
there is a like mostly completed glass of sparkling liquid poncel comp asked me to make sure that he's
just shut up you all weak and i'm going to leave what and i'm going to exceptional charisma it's true
uh and i gotta come back
uh he's such a way with words who here can tell me if this is poisoned i can do that
all right baldrick is going to use his immense power uh thurston what am i doing what do you want a
crafting yeah crafting is appropriate here uh or medicine either or uh what would i what would i
get a bonus from this with should i use alchemical savant or uh i would allow that yeah i'd allow that
i think that should be fine go great solo 23 um yeah so um you you take an action to sort of look it over
uh identifying it um you are able to identify that it is like a particularly hard liquor um like
someone poured this guy a triple basically hmm uh but there's no poison in it uh
mexican do a better job but unfortunately it's not really poisoned it's just exceptionally strong
damn so you're saying this won't kill someone uh enough of it might but no all right i walk over
to this table oh i found a free drink for you and then i walk back that's not a table it's just a
crate yeah whatever this is a display piece you just put it on that guy yeah just oh no ten houses
dissociating i just i just put this drink here i've got a free drink for you and then i go back to talking
over here all right why is that tyrant's guardsman here then if they hate this so much
social obligation more than likely all right i believe they're here keeping order but also
it does not seem like they want to be here based upon my conversations with them uh
uh rather not fond of the assemblage of nobles here yet they recognize the importance of keeping
order there's more to it but i don't feel it's exactly relevant to the situation at hand regrettably
even though they are a bunch of bastards they do still have an outward facing obligation to not
look quite as monstrous as you'd think very well fail at that
well at this juncture i say we fan out vena do you want my assistance in dealing with sandal
or would you prefer rahuas you know oh i almost doesn't look like chris redfield right now
yeah okay yeah crisp redwood hold on true crisp redwood um in that case i think you're probably
better served elsewhere tanny you're right i will go talk to the tyrant's guardsman perhaps i can get
more information about the image to be him the him he's having a stroke
i press the reset button on his chest those ten hours are just usually shout when we're trying to
be quiet no he's updating the three people by the cube has probably heard everything by now
and just be like oh gosh we'll have to kill them we'll have to kill them all no i presumably we've been
silent save for the two times where tanhauser has shouted which has mostly been because i got tongue
tied uh baldrick is gonna pat so who's who's going to sandal that's tanhauser and vena no vena and
okay uh baldrick is gonna pat tanhauser on the shoulder and say all right so i can make a
distraction and probably get their attention if you want to go convince the uh piano player to play
you know the juggling act oh i thought that you were going to do that well i kind of can't you don't
want it tied to us right the best thing to do for that is to do when they're not looking and i can
more easily distract than i think well you can
so you're saying i should intimidate that small feline person behind the piano or pam whichever one
so you're saying i should intimidate them i'm saying do what you're gonna do just don't leave a trail
very good it will be done
um all righty then so uh i will um you know i did notice these fellas left yeah this door
has been open and i'm presuming we have not been stealthy or quiet about anything so we're probably
hosed now but hey that's life i i presumed we were being quiet up until the two times where i screamed
something yeah we can't we can't exactly stage whisper to one another uh in the call but i'm assuming that
the the crew is trying to be subtle yeah we're not like complete brain dead numbskulls uh is there
anything is there anything you would prefer us to roll to ensure that we kept uh a relative like
um silence as to what we've been getting together and muttering thurston hmm hmm stealth all right
so we're all rolling stealths mm-hmm hey thurston uh hang on a second i've got a thing for this i think
yes hey so i have a question i have an answer maybe i have the i have the feet quiet allies
oh that's that's that seems very appropriate when you are avoiding notice and your allies follow the
expert you and those allies can roll a single stealth check using the lowest modifier instead of rolling separately
that's nice mm-hmm now that'll mean that whoever has the worst stealth is going to be rolling for us
oh oran's got a 14 i've got a fort uh i've got a 14 as well i also have a one all right well so odds
are the only person who would probably be standing at would be him anyway so okay well you are following
the expert which is the exploration activity which this would be exploration mode you match your tactic
or similar no no no wait wait um you match the their tactic or tim similar checks thanks to your
allies assistance you can add your level as a proficiency bonus so rahua you can add your
level to the check as well so you would effectively follow baldrick and then you would get your terrible
bonus but he effectively counts you as being trained so nice so you'll be actually rolling at a
plus nine instead of not bad not bad at all there you go there you go do we want to do that or do
we want to wing it with the stealth because odds are probably the best for the best that we only get
one roll because uh i i imagine it's a situation where only one of us needs to fail to completely
fuck it up yep and uh if we just have one person fail even if it's the weakest person uh they can hear
a point that it's just less chances to roll in that one now i want to ask am i rolling that for
rahua or is rahua rolls it damn it because he doesn't have oh he never mind he just got one
nice thanks chat thank you guys i love you all right uh you want a smoke stick we'll be kidding
no that'll be distracting and large don't do that all right rahua give us uh d20 plus nine i guess okay
here we go be prepared to re-roll in case it's uh well tell them what you're telling what you're
i rolled a three on the die with a plus nine for 12. so would you like to hero quest that sir
i i'm thinking i should hero quest that i think i'm gonna take a sip of this you have a 10 chance
you have a 10 chance to roll worse so that's fine oh but you know my odds my uh my dice rolls are buns
so never tell them the odds never tell me the odds let's hero point it and accept the consequences
i took a sip let's see what happens hey that's significant for 28 in total let's go just imagine
that the stealth is represented by occasionally when tanhouser like gets animated rahua just turns and
goes yes that is exactly what so yeah thurston there's our there's our collective stealth role
whoo that was a pretty good use of a cool feet everybody see it's pretty useful when you need them
to be i took i took it for a reason now we'll never use it for 30 more episodes i appreciate it
it is literally i don't trust my companions which is the most baldrick of feats
it really is it is i i fucking adore when skill feats work that way uh yeah no you've uh
somehow despite everything you have managed to keep everything on the dl thank god we are so
powerful we'll see how long it stays that way hey hey hey hey don't call me out like that don't
call me out like that all right no no no no no wait wait wait wait wait wait
okay uh yeah so we got our game plan we've got uh baldrics on catboy duty uh me and rahua are going
to talk to uh sandals uh oran is gonna go skunk mode and is probably gonna wait for the queue to
make the room stinky what's the queue
uh i don't know uh just do it in what would be hang on uh if you're so the queue should probably be
something that doesn't mean anything to anyone else obviously so maybe just like
pickles clear your throat three times and that is when oran will know when to go
well because we're distracted me and tanhauser are coordinating to get the
fucking distraction on our end i have an idea just scratch the top of your helmet
that's true that's something that it probably wouldn't be noticed but is just just obvious
enough sure why not sure who who cares it'll probably work out just fine
well don't say it like that it always does we're so good at our job
well let's see if we can put that to the test then yeah yeah i'm worried hold me i need to go to
the little druid's room and he leaves to go turn into a skunk oh my god or notices that the door to
the artifacts is open is that intention yes yes it is it's like oran comes back he goes to vena vena
the treasure room's open is anything missing not yet
uh hold on i'm gonna lean out uh and a peek into the treasure room uh is anybody in there no one is
currently in there that you can see uh is there any like weirdness do i notice anything missing we
had kind of gotten a peek into the room so i i don't know like if somebody stole like a trinket i
wouldn't notice but if somebody stole like a statue you see like a a very ornate um what almost
appears to be like a a communion like a the equivalent of like a communion bowl um but like
a very like ornate basin of uh representing the first house and the sort of core pantheon of
outset and the wider predominant continent there's like a bust in there that's marble it has like the
face of this like stern man and it's got like a plating on it and then there are several like
closed chests of uh goods and equipment in here that have just been sort of left here for inspection
hmm um so yeah i i don't notice anything out of the ordinary or do you want me to give you a
perception you want to go in there and start perceiving you absolutely can all right well i don't
want to get too distracted because i'm on i'm on i'm on sandals duty uh but yeah i'll just give it a
look see sure
my perception is okay all right natural 20 i'll give you that one
the door slams shut on you as you uh as the the face of the bust turns to you and begins staring
so uh you come here often
and you will save i genuinely can't believe we've already failed
i i genuinely that's that is a record for us
greed laid low many a good hero earned ill and we will be no different
checking something oh i i can't wait i can't wait for you know to get hit with the rot gaze
i'm about to die again bro oh great now that one's bad
you got a hero point though oh you got a hero point if you're here if your hero point curious today
uh god the natural 20 into the immediate dick punch thank you thurston you're welcome
you're absolutely noticing the weird
shit that's happening in here good job thank you okay i'll hero point that hero quest all right oh
oh that's better that's a 29 oh okay um you feel as though this is like some kind of mental effect
that's just like clawing at the edge of your skull you you don't feel that the um the bust has any kind
of like magical power there's something else going on here um you feel like the the best way to to
resolve this is just like if you go and touch the bust like you'll prove that it's not like this weird
fucking magic-y hocus-pocus stuff and that'll ground you in reality yeah i gave it i gave it a little
experimental touch just just barely and i'm gonna look around the road feeling the door slamming behind
me what my natural 20 uh per chance net it sort of noticed the like the the the ambiance it it sort of
gave you this sense like one of the crates here um had something that like triggered like the edge of
one of the crates where it's sort of been um nailed down like you feel these like almost tendrils of
darkness seeping out um but then they sort of manifested in in the distraction that was the
the bust okay i'll i'll meander on over to the boxes i want you to give me three acrobatics checks
three yes okay uh first one
uh well even with the two on the die that's a 21. that's cool okay second one another two again
a 21 a 21
fucking christ
and a 28 have you ever seen that like simpsons episode with sideshow bob and the rakes
um you kind of have a similar situation as you start walking and every step you feel something but
you're like so you're so compelled to go to this this box and figure out what's in it um and like after
a moment you realize that like your your boots have been somewhat cut up what the fuck um and that
you uh now have um some persistent bleed damage oh damn it as you realize and look down that the floor
here has been scattered with caltrops i didn't notice the caltrops no you didn't natural 20 correct
what are they invisible um you notice that you've been like so absolutely intent on like the
the reality warping in here you can also tell that like this could have been a way effing worse but
your perception kept it so that like you weren't directly stepping on them like you're taking one
point of persistent bleed if you would like not been as as alert as you were you might have taken a lot
more damage from just like willy-nilly stepping in here and not being as as alert as you are but the
thing that you do notice now that you like take stock of these is you've seen these caltrops before
fair enough where have i seen these in your feet they're often beyond in my head by a member of your
party what yeah
who's always you've you've seen these used against various foes throughout this campaign
including at one point and it sticks in your your memory a tree i don't actually were you there
for the tree you might not have been there for the i was not there for the tree that's right so okay
you've seen caltrops before but not not a tree
because do you know tanhauser loves to use caltrops tanny did you drop your
fucking couch drops as you turn to the door that is currently closed or unlike well i ever like to come
up to the door nausea and i try to open it yep yeah yeah it it opens immediately and yeah what are
you doing in here you see like caltrops scattered on the floor vena's there what are you doing there's
some bullshit happening in this room yeah you're bleeding and stepping on everything just get out of
here tanny did you drop your goddamn caltrops where did he go uh i presumably when the door slammed we
would have been alerted right yeah okay and you would see like oren sort of like rushing towards
what's going on are these your caltrops i look at them i mean it's impossible for me to tell but
i didn't lay any caltrops your caltrops are missing oh someone stole my caltrops
huh oh um so with volley's nat 20 would she be able to tell if anything had been recently moved
or stolen like anything that had been like resting here that maybe would have made any like imprints or
like well we did say that the box was fucked up yeah um so so um i i like that you're you're asking
on behalf of uh of a natural 20 of another player i appreciate this level of teamwork i i just figured
that it would have been revealed revealed um what you notice is that there were some things you remember
standing atop some of these barrels in the corner of the room uh particularly like some fine like
little gemstones that are now missing fucking ponselcompt ah yes somebody go get that bastard i
think if we manage to tell our good friend sandal that ponselcompt's been fucking stealing from him
he'll tell us everything ow my feet that is a good point let us go
still want me stink up the place uh hold off on that but keep it in the back of your mind okay
now that's that's definitely our our next order of business i'll uh i'll take vena and i guess we'll
go speak to mr sandal himself okay all right i guess i'm taking oren to go talk to that guy then
yeah we gotta go get ponselcompt in fact we might want to go confront him first before we go to uh
uh he is he's not in the accessible place right now he's on the uh oh he came back
where did he go uh he he left elsewhere i said i saw him like wander toward the balcony yeah he's not
here right now yeah we'd have to go find him uh the entire point of doing all of this is to get sandal
alone but if we can get sandal alone by convincing him that he has been stolen from and then convincing
him that we can help him find the thief which we probably can because we have enough physical evidence
that we are not the thieves um then that defeats the purpose of even
fucking with the party in the first place
so so what you're telling me is we just got undercut and there's no reason to do any of what
we just did i think so well we'll keep it in our back pocket keep it in our back
i'm introducing events to to shake up events oh my god he's so mean ruining our plans
mr do you want me to be annoyed at you because that's a good way to do that
well no you can be annoyed at me for another reason because today i learned that the first
episode of veggie tales oh we're going on a break
all right let's go talk father let's go all right what does it even look they're gonna point to it
well we'll find out and i mean again there's a fair chance given our history of charisma roles
that uh we will go talk to sandal and then uh not accomplish our goal and so then we will
probably have to resort to funny shenanigans like skunk time exactly yeah go talk to him
yeah so i think the the order of business should be uh myself and rahua go to sandal uh everybody
else try to find ponselcompt all right i'll be on the lookout um i will start marching after uh
this tiny gnome and somebody please help my poor aching feedies oh i can help with that use magic
like like i can help with that or goes into a potted plant just reaches into like the dirt and
fertilizer oh oh wonderful why are there worms in a potted plant that's disturbing and uh you know
you know helps keep it alive and um you just start muds it up a little bit going here you go vena he
comes out with open hands and oh oh oh oran oran oran we are we are literally at a rich people party
please put your muddy hands away oh sorry he wipes it on the curtains
uh i i think i can help you out with that but uh bear with me here rahua will
bring his hand down to vena's achy achy hurtie foot and he will shoot out a black inky tendril of
star stuff and i will just try and perform a medicine check on her
that's what i was doing yeah but you were doing with mud i'm doing it with like weird space
shit okay oh it's okay oran i i usually love your fun muddy shenanigans
just between you and me we are we are the two different tiers of those misleading mobile game
ads where you're starting off at like street thug i'm like ceo here i'm level one thug you're
under level 100 bob boss i get it but if you take my gold out of my briefcase i become a level zero
thug that is true yeah we didn't account for that you would be wise to join my gang at a
seven twenty one oh boy the success oh we're on it let's go you managed to heal the one hit point
that vena was missing yay okay what's going on here as you all turn okay yep sweet roll the attack roll
okay hi so sorry about that uh there seems to be i ran into some trouble with my boots i'm gonna like
like uh exaggeratedly pout and show where my my poor aching what happened to my poor feedies
what
look
fucking no sorry thursday i just i feel like i've been flash banged
no no no no you flash banged me here like oh my poor boot and i'm gonna show him how the
fuck do you show this to him oh i just like i just gesture down you gestured out of the veggie
tails bandage on your foot presumably there is well you said it fucked up my boots and stuff yeah on the
boot yeah like yeah like so you're like lifting it up like like look at the bottom of my boot it has a
hole in it is that what you're going for no chat sandal is not a feat man leave that the
fuck alone right now i um you guys knew where you were going with this i unironically did not
okay anyway jesus i'm canceling this show yeah you know what i'm i'm i'm in agreement with you zor
and we've gone far enough all right we're playing fallout now sorry guys foot ride is over
we had a good run all right i i'm gonna take i'm gonna take a step back there
i'm gonna i'm gonna rewind a little bit so we all get our giggles
and i'm just going to say oh my gosh i think there's been a problem i saw that the door was
open to the to the the room with all the artifacts in them and i saw poncel comp running off
oh okay what's the problem well i think that some jewels have been stolen
okay what's the problem what you don't care but he's just
jewels but i mean it's because they're your they're your jewels how dare he do that to you
hey give me a deception check i i will gladly gladly i will gladly deceive um oh god does does
why to me apply here lie is naturally as you backflip
this guy has to be nouveau rich there is no way someone that was old money would ever be
like able to let go someone stealing a single dollar from them
he goes up and is like why
this guy's trump rich not my god all right that's a 21. yeah
okay okay i need to refresh this goddamn page why can't i you might need to refresh your mind
sandal declin comes swaggering towards you vena places an arm around your uh your shoulder
and it's like listen here i can be generous i'm a generous man
and uh a couple gemstones they don't mean a thing to me you know i put this on so people
could come here and have a good time like the children and he pats oran on the head with his
other hand the children can i roll a fort or will save the not growl absolutely like a like a
like a corrupted kid in the forest i apologize to everyone i give you so many trigger warnings of how
fucking awful this no that's fine we're we're playing it out this is perfect
good he's literally a teenager i'm i'm literally three years old it's like i roll a 27 why do i care
yep so don't worry about it babe it's if people want to take take some money here
that's okay i got a lot to spare have i mentioned i'm building an airship
wow you're like so generous that's really kind of you
yeah no i'm pretty kind his arm comes off also i've been standing for a while i'm going back to my
couch oh okay well thanks so much he doesn't care he doesn't care what the
fuck nothing important was stolen i mean i i gave the place a pretty thorough look over i would
like to roll a perception check to basically kind of gather what exactly he super cares about which i
would imagine would be his image and his reputation he wants people to fawn over him
i'm imagining so i would like a perception check i mostly established that
see where i can really get him i rolled a 29. um so this is like an art exhibit right like these are
all fancy things that he's showing off um what oran gets is that he wants to add to his um metaphorical
art exhibit and he has found a new piece in vena
i cannot wait to electrocute this man to death
oran oh sorry uh oran picks up on this and they're like vena yeah i have something horrible to suggest to
you but we have your back like if we want to get this guy alone we could probably try you could
probably try to encourage him a little bit we'll follow along with you or so and then when he's alone
we could like crash through the windows or something or like crash through his door and then we'll we'll
have him where we got him is it still too late for you to become a skunk i would love to
hey uh hey thurston i got a quick question yep while this is going can i prepare a dosage of
belladonna yes you absolutely can prepare some poison oh it's for me baldrick is just like
standing around just casually putting some stuff together and he's gonna just like
call vena over just by like beckoning with like two fingers like hey yo
yo yo uh so shall i am i crafting jack i i'm like i i i'm gonna like bypass the regular crafting
rules because this is narratively amazing
ah again with that but it's a 22 is that you got a point you got to hear a point i'm asking you is
that fine it's not gonna be enough to make it in the time you desire to make it all right i'm gonna
i'm gonna redo that with a hero hero point
that's much better that's a six yeah you're able to like like put together ingredients very quickly
you've got this and it's you're just about finished as the time as you see someone like
walking with purpose towards your group and it's morhell palm the um the dwarf head of the of the farmer's
guild uh as as he's approaching baldrick is gonna put the finishing touches on the
the thing i presume and he's going to stuff it quickly into his coat pocket and he's passing by
the the rest of your your companions and it's just sort of like baldrick where's baldrick right there
orl is right next to us he like walks past you stands through the hall stairs um sorry walks
walks past yeah stares right up to you looks into like the visor of your bucket raises
a hand and points directly at you 10 feet away
baldrick
dots
points to the bar dots
baldrick will sigh all right sure why not more help palm approves come on
while while while he's going past again i'm presuming he had tried to beckon vena over
yep and baldrick is going to palm the small uh volume of belladonna into her inventory
good idea so is this is this uh a killing amount or is this a hurts very bad amount
should it's not gonna be very nice i'm sure he's not going to enjoy the feeling it gives him but
it's mostly just to uh confuse and sicken him it'll take a about 30 minutes for it to all go
off but after 10 he should be at least a little bit more uh clouded fine all right yeah i feel like
this is a anything this is a bit of a don corneo situation i'm gonna pocket that yeah give her a
give her a belladonna what can possibly go wrong this is the point where in the corner of the screen it
says the gm will remember this uh how do i can i share the belladonna with the chat
yeah sure is that how that works how do i do yeah um it's in your inventory right yeah you just
collect the icon i did i didn't uh oh it might not have like a chat oh hang on no i didn't i didn't
craft it i had the that was the thing now we get the bobject for you you know where's the bobject
the object i don't want to edit the item yeah i can't i can't post it but that's fine if you click
on the icon it does it and here i'm on it also i yeah i just realized i'm on private sorry about that
oh yes belladonna it's it's a light poison but it's a little poison it's just a little poison
considering most civilians have at least 10 hit points it's unlikely to kill them
he's got one hit point he just explodes yeah unless he's got an immunity to it but yeah
boldrick's gonna palm that very quickly and move past as though nothing is happening all right
okay i'm going to take rahua and we're going to split up to go and speak to our good uh uh friend
sandal well as as you you make your your your way away um yourself and rahua i'll just start moving
you um you pass by more hell and baldrick and more hell leans towards you baldrick and it's like
that entirely depends on your definition of cool
it's kind of kind of boring to buy shots of two people who's cool
well regrettably i think they're all heading off but he's gonna he's gonna feign trying to call
vena and rahua over but he's gonna just kind of he's just kind of got that raise your hand and
then like curl in your fingers like eh never mind get oran drunk uh he's gonna call oran over oran
he's a nervous wreck he comes with him yeah yeah it's mr baldrick wait wait wait wait wait
uh more hell pushes you out of the way baldrick and sits in the seat in the middle now great
my name's motor bomb and he like sticks out his hand towards you oran will very adding this homeless
guy to our shots roster or will very nervously shake his hand going hi i'm
oh good oran you got a strong grip on that arm it's like it's made out of wood or something
he looks at his arm yeah how old are you he starts sweating like i'm uh i'm 19.
excellent triple for the boy what he looks over and there's like a colossal glasses and it's just
like it's legal here and outside you're fine it's forced perspectives like ah drinking agent
outset is uh like 11. yeah exactly yeah because the water's not very good okay oh god uh look upon
thy death or and don't forget the child the the yeah exactly i was just about to pull out the art
and be like as evidence bye i don't really like rock because they have this peasant child
constant draw they promote child dragonness listen we promote child preparation for work
exactly it's true if this session is
i just um i'm just looming in the fucking corner like batman actually i screen oh my god i'd like to
point something out yeah um so we all agree right that chasing after the gnome would be of no help to
our endeavors at all oh and in fact would just be detrimental right oh no well that was the last
thing you guys told me to do and then you did all of this yep and i i feel like i have no choice but to
continue with that mission so is it okay i'm gonna roll this perception and see if i find the
no okay here's the good roll here's the one good roll one two three i really wanted to
there you go show me your face as you as you move over five squares from your current position and look
to the north you see that ponkelcompt is on the balcony um do like standing atop the table uh just
articulating wildly and like uh to a group of onlookers like this because of your microphone
on the discord you sounded like a bee oh perfect he's just sitting on the table going froggy looks
in chat do we want to talk about the bee movie script moving on if we can't talk about our veggie
sonas we can't talk about the bee movie uh the presence of the hegemon meaning that i cannot do what
i wanted to do which was uh grab him and then viciously beat him into a bloodied pulped mass on
the floor um i'll just go back tragically forced to be useful to the encounter now wow
i mean the hegemon is there you can't you can uh uh socialize with the man who murdered us
yeah this is probably not a good idea to to engage the hegemon i don't trust myself to do anything
other than antagonize him and understandable that's not useful to our to the mission give
me a perception check tanhazer another one yeah another one another one and another another one
that's okay uh as you are before you like head back here so like as you're having this like
stare off at ponkel comped on the table tanhazer notices the hegemon is flipping him off and must go
and engage him now no the hegemon like certainly has taken note to you and like gives you a smile and a
nod i look at him i take my thumb i run it across my neck and then i turn back okay
um oren you feel a little jibe in your side
from uh from more hell kind of giving you the elbow
so i got a question yeah it's the metal man over there with you
you seeing like tanhazer coming through the door looking around assessing the scene
um or tries to think of a tactical way to do it where it's like it's like
obviously he's seen with us with the group he's like he's like yeah he's he's with our group
hold on i gotta knock at the door he leans in towards you
is he cool
oh at that point yeah he's pretty cool wow did you have to roll to see if you thought
tanhazer was cool i think he's really cool well he's he's done so many amazing things and he really
puts his passions into a lot of stuff and and i think he's i think he's pretty spectacular sir
for our podcast people i just want you to know that zoran the bear had to roll a d20
to answer the question of if tanhazer was cool or not is that is that a deception check or
don't worry about it now did he pass or did he succeed
what is my opinion of tanhazer is it low or is it high
as the person controlling all of your characters all the time i have decided that baldrick has a
particularly high opinion of tanhazer i i'm gonna walk back has this guy been drinking the drink i
gave him no no take it back ungrateful and then i'm going to walk back over here
bartender i need another one of these
uh he like more help palm nudges you again with simple oh he's cool hey friend hello there how are
you today good good we're about to do some shots are you in we're shots eh i like the cut of your jib
show me the gun i need a shot i thought you were gonna say i like the cut of your jib no
that was no he's just going to shoot him
but you know he pulls a holdout pistol out of his boot and puts it yeah
yeah i'll play right with a semi-automatic pistol uh or moves over god like i win like step around for
me mr tanhazer i get a sense that you and i are going to get along together i reach into my coat
pocket and i pull out some of my literature i'd like you to take this home and read this and tell
me if you have any questions it's like a pamphlet all right a revolution with you you're funny you think
i read i have people to read for me bartender triples all around
vena is the only one not drinking can everybody can everybody have a moment to pour one out for a fallen soldier
oh yeah later we're gonna be at the party oh sorry vena i didn't know that you even like to drink
well on the note of i thought you got tired of drinking after all that alcohol go back to the
drinking go back to the drinking we're who will like very subtly tug on vena's sleeve vena vena they're
socially pressuring me into drinking i want to feel cool too can i go get drunk can all of you leave
vena alone with this man again i i don't i don't think i'm good i i'm merely obeying the winds of fate
they want me to go drink rahua far be it from me to deny anybody anybody the chance to go and
get roaring drunk at a function where it is a little appropriate a little inappropriate to be
roaring drunk go i'm gonna feel for the first time i just imagine as you're coming towards like
more hell's like banging on the desk like yeah yeah yeah no we're all like um oren also gets into
and he's not excited like shots shots shots shots shots shots shots see if he wasn't polymorphed i
just would have had him go tree tree tree tree but but alas and a lack the road less traveled so
abandoned vena you approach the gaggle surrounding sandal deckland who was sprawled across the entirety of
the couch a little a little sliver of stomach cleavage visible under his slightly too short shirt
and his arms like and uh that's where we'll take our break oh he's gonna ask like a tray of champagne
how did we get here again i would like to point out that who is the worst bar boyfriend
i know like i'm fucking worst wingman 2023 all right well we'll be right back shots shots shots
shots shots shots shots shots shots shots shots short but that's that's what i thought that's going on
the camera will zoom in oh we don't have to wait wait oh yeah dude dude dude dude dude you know
hey vena odo needs to take a shot yeah once again i'm just gonna share this image with everyone just
to remind them punchable man all right so given that like we sort of had half of a plan and then my
friends went off to go and get drunk um i'm assuming the goal is still to try to get him alone and to try
to press him for details about the medics guild and about that sort of thing yeah because if i recall
from last session and again please correct me if i'm wrong thurston it's been a hot minute he
didn't give me any solid information about his connection to what's happening with the medics
guild correct very little no yeah okay uh and we have reason to believe that he does
okay excellent just making sure we're on the same page so as as you come up to this uh punchable man
he currently has a a woman fawning over him
oh he's standing close to the arm of the sofa um and it's just like taking in every word that sandal
deckland has to say this is like a a younger maybe like maybe like early latest mid-twenties woman
uh in a fine noble accoutrement um it's very stylized to be green she has somewhat like
almost like a like a dull um reddish pink hair and she's just she's just enjoying the company of this man
interesting all right um pretending as if i don't notice her i am just going to walk up and just
oh my gosh i'm so sorry so sorry i got all cleaned up um so what did i miss
um sandal is like kind of fawning over this woman a bit and there's like like this this brief like
turn towards you and you can tell give me a perception check actually give me a check vena
oh that is the wrong thing why is zilly in here that's a good question yeah i wish i wish zilly was
here that's a good question mega man uh i'm gonna give you a 25 okay a 25 is enough to know that
sandal deckland the punchable man noble is having a a crisis
um on which woman he currently wants to give his attention to oh what what uh what a shame yeah
um and currently he's really really enjoying this like woman who's kind of like lackadaisically
stroking his hair oh petting him yes boy does he purr like a walrus
do you do you want this is her
you know just sitting there just listen
you know that's what he's like it's on the couch
oh well i'm an ally to women first and foremost so i gotta get her out of here i gotta get her out
of here oh god okay okay oh all right what are you doing vena i look chat i gave them every warning
under the sun how awful this person would be and they sent vena alone so i i i was
meanwhile in the background shots shots shots she was not sent alone she was abandoned
yeah that's very gotta say you didn't have to come over here
you could have stayed with vena you just chose to come over here you chose i want rahua to drink
vena would never tell rahua not to drink look my original plan was so thankful for you for that
my original plan was going to have froggy join the call and play this npc you're lucky that didn't
happen i i would have loved for froggy to do this actually we had froggy in chat
okay yeah um i'm gonna give this girl just a quick once over is she is she into this guy or is she
trying to get something out of him because if so i might be able to uh i mean maybe i'll uno reverse
card him and just start hitting on her instead oh that's a genius fucking idea that's that's a play
oh no out here cutting the gordian knot jesus that is the play i think
i mean yeah all right i'm yeah fuck it i'm having fun with this i'm going to uh smile it i'm gonna
smile at sandal and i'm gonna i'm gonna lean over to this girl and just oh my gosh you are so pretty
what's your name oh oh you hit me where it hurts um i need name for this npc uh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah chat come up with a good one or froggy lock in chat her name is froggy lock it's no
oh gosh the names the names yeah veronica all right april her name is loggy frock
loggy frock what what a name her full loggy is a is a is a pet name her full name is lagartia
lagartia thank you erndell coming in with the clutch gming thank you for backup gm uh erndell uh
baldrick can have another hero point please waiter more hero points please
waiter waiter waiter more narrative
waiter waiter more narrative fields please
um you want to type the name in chat so you so oh no doesn't have to keep remembering it every
time oh yeah okay in the in the boundary chat uh yeah no no i got it there you go so do you whichever
one oh her name is logertia all right there's a look there's a look there's a look there's a show
wow where's that name from i've never heard anything like it
i i hate how you've heard uno reverse card this on me welcome to my game thurston
not not not in utica no it's not master the game game master have have no sympathy for a game master
no sympathy for the devil you set this fucker up now you get what you saw
oh one sec i have to i have to collect myself now oh my god oh no roshi please
please please bully thurston into getting this character out of this conflict so that he doesn't
need to generate your back story oh no lagertia frock is now in the setting everyone
chad gpt time time to get chad gpt in on this shit no no we don't we don't don't do ai nope nope
nope don't do that lagertia frock turns to you and as she does the the the the light pink hair
bobs slightly and you see the the green sort of tasseling that's holding it meticulously in place
she stares at you vena and begins to casually walk without speaking a response she she begins to walk
down standing
at the opposite end of the couch watching past you and she looks at you
and
without even acknowledging you she turns
and she begins brushing the belly hair of sandal declin's exposed belly if you would
fluffs the belly cleavage of this man i am i'm gonna go to take a shot of garlic
what does this become a war all of a sudden like i i guess this is a war of attrition okay
you know you could poison her instead i'm okay with that too
okay uh what are my skills here
just do a backflip if you need if you need to tap if you need to tap someone in just call for
i've got this i've got this i've got this oh no we're we're uh yeah we're in this now
we're stuck here we're stuck here all right okay so she she's got it she's got her eyes on uh mr mr
sandals uh and i am just going to smile at the both of them and just wow
the three prettiest people at the party all right here together this is amazing
and i'm going to sit how much room is there on the couch
um so she like
luggy frock is standing she's not sitting on the couch
oh she's standing she's not yeah yeah yeah she's like she's standing tickle okay okay okay okay okay
uh in that case i'm going to smile at the both of them is there like a uh a tray of like champagne or
anything um they're they're like fancy party waiters and so forth coming around absolutely
yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna beckon one of the waiters to come and i'm going to get three glasses of fancy
champagne um i'm going to get one for myself i'm going to get one for lugersha and i'm going to get
one for our good friend sandal and i'm going to very subtly just
slip the belladonna out of my bag when nobody's looking and tip it into his drink
okay i require you to give me a stealth check
i would love to do that for you who is that froggy just
why is froggy here keep going keep going oh boy all right uh stealth check uh oh thank you thank you
chat for the hero quest um i'm going to do my damnedest here to make something work
it's a natural one
why do i even bother oh why do i even bother
a complication occurs oh boy you can't re-roll that
yeah so as you live for a complication i'll re-explain for people who probably haven't seen
this yet who may be new or whatever need more pressure so basically the rule that we did because
chat's able to give us hero points and stuff like basically doing money and stuff and thirsting gets
filling points a bit too uh to balance that because we've learned from warhams we don't
want people just to pay to win us all the time so as a detriment and also to make the patrons make
us suffer whenever you roll a natural one you cannot re-roll it so uh what happens is that people on
patreon you submit to a pool on patreon at patreon.com force that's narrative declaration where you too
can mess this up and you submit to a pool and we just basically get it all in this excel sheet and
we just pull from it just pull random suggestions we change things because we're like hey don't make
it character specific because that doesn't help us at all so we just pull from stuff that might work out
here and uh funny stuff happens sometimes so what did you find thurston okay so i'm gonna double whammy
this i'm gonna double whammy this thank you thurston you're welcome you're welcome so
i would like to thank drunken finn for this amazing amazing complication entitled
bitch slap 2.0 um as you're offering these drinks two things happen much like the 2.0
one vena you find yourself slapped in the face by lagership but also you find that your intended
recipient of the poison was not the one to take the glass you intended instead lagership takes
the poisoned drinks quaffs it back slaps you across the face and then what does lagership say
to vena please frog you're such a bitch oh my god who do you think you are calling me beautiful
you don't know beauty you can't recognize beauty and she splays herself over the big slappable fat man
and she's like i wrote a haiku for you and she traces a little circle around his belly button and she's
like belly like a beach ball chasing after ice cream truck rolling not a stroll and then she promptly
vomits and dies
i'm sorry the the comedic timing
someone has brought in a bird oh no it's been flying around the room i'm a i'm a collector that's
just the one i've got in my pocket today that's my little bird i caught in my hamster wow you like
birds that's that's really cool yeah i'm gonna reach into my uh belt yep i'm going to pull out my gun
okay i'm going to cock the safety back i'm going to press it against lagership's head wow this escalated
i'm going to press the gun against her head and i'm just going to say all right matey
i'm going to need you to do me a favor i'm going to need you to get on your knees and i'm going to
need you to say that you are so very sorry oh god she does she gets down on her hands and knees
sniveling and she's got birds in her pockets and she's like oh i'm so sorry oh no oh my god
oh my birds oh my birds give me the bird i'm taking the bird i'm taking the bird catwalk walks in
and interjects as the pistol comes out like hand up she doesn't say anything but this like cheetah arm
the the catwalk who has been the sort of like quiet bodyguard for sandal like like gently pushes the
gun back i'm so sorry friend you know that your good friend sandal isn't in any danger here
and i'm going like she like looks at you and like looks at the holster and looks back to you and is
like you know not speaking but it's like put the fucking gun away this is a party
all right are you very sorry ma'am and as this happens as you go to turn and say that and you get it out
whoa ladies there's enough sandal deckland to go around he has his belly
please don't take my birds i'm ever so sorry it's just that my having my my
birds is the only way to cover for the screaming that's coming through my microphone
please prefer please preserve the immersion please thank you all right for the sake of immersion you
can have your bird back i'm watching you i'm so sorry i'm so sorry your lips are actually quite
plump now that i get a better look oh well thank you dear you actually have very nice complexion
oh thank you i'm so blue such a sweetheart so mr declan with this little aside now finished i think
that um i think i really need to get some air if you'd like to come join me
oh can we like talk here kind of sprawled out it's nice i did a lot of walking to go talk to you
earlier just tell there's a chair outside aren't there so many chairs outside your manor is so
beautiful you have so many wonderful chairs that i'm sure are just begging to be sat in
oh uh this isn't my place i just rented it
well all the more reason to grace these chairs with your presence that's so hot what if you spread
your lumps around on more chairs that would be so hot of you thank you lagarsha you are such an ally
okay and i think it's it's best when you give your legs a little stretch before we keep talking and
hanging out and she she twiddles her little finger around his belly button and his belly hair
it's like girl i i would have also accepted shooter um we're gonna we're gonna cut back to the bar
momentarily are we can we recover from this i can't why not oh yeah i'm in pain
all right i think i like all of you are we drunk at this point enough of the sapphic romance it's
boys night uh no the first shot has been laid in front of you we're gonna role play all of this lads
strap in for the more hell palm experience you know gentlemen i don't think anything could ruin this
night unless of course someone brought their bird in that would really piss me off the bird enters
in through the door or looks at tanhauser offended as a spirit he looks at his bird wings and his bird legs
and he looks at him when he goes and he's like bro
oh i i think i think not cool tanhauser not cool yeah you can't backpedal out of that one you
you screwed yourself that's that's on you that shows me what i get for trying to yes and the bit
i see it's been long established that tanhauser is the most racist of the party yeah yes it is so
hard you tanhauser became racist again i reiterate thurston are you sure we can recover from this
abso-fucking-lutely we can all right i'm gonna sit on palms in the house and it's like
baldrick you got some you got some fine friends here
uh yeah of a sort no not of a sort you're brothers and i can see that
and he has this like serious moment as he like looks down the bar towards or and then to tanhauser
then over to baldrick and rahua sort of nods i've seen this camaraderie before
it's important it means something
do you know what it means baldrick he stares you in the eyes and the soul into the depths of your being
yeah why don't you tell me
it means we're gonna do two triples back to back another please the bartender's just like oh my
fucking god and she begins like pouring more drinks all right this is the brotherhood my name's
moral palm you don't forget that from the farmer's guild i started off in the inheritor lands far away but
i came here i made something of myself and you you all look like you're gonna make something of
yourselves well some of you already have
you're from the inheritor lands are you that's right which part
do you really want to know i'm curious all right well
and he like has this this pause and this is the point probably where like um
oh this is this is like the point where very clearly there would be like a an option that
would pop up of like join our patreon uh and find out more about more help palm in the outset guilds and
i'm just saying that because i need to actually pull up the exact notes because he is an npc listed
in our outset guilds guide we released um and he stares into you and your eyes tanhauser and says oh
yes far east inheritor lands started off there uh dealing with all sorts of uh furs and leathers between the
city states ever made your way out as far as the gorgoth and dominion fuck that place he drinks a shot
immediately i'll also drink a shot and like as as tanhauser you and more hell bond over the hatred of
your estranged homeland more hell like looks over to baldrick rehu and then orrin and like kind of like
shakes their empty shot glass oh fuck the gongothans right
baldrick's gonna drink
good do we we don't have to make drink alcohol tests for this do we not yet okay
only because i'll get it cancelled someone say something
kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss uh huh no me me
well then um looking at the rounds of drinks we've been doing at which point in the eta do we see the
gun come out and the commotion you know after the first shot is had the gun comes out
and like i just tanhauser like get up to intervene i have a feeling that violence is in the air would you
give me a moment uh more hell palm puts his stout but also like very long like he's almost like a
human-sized dwarf his hand goes across your chest no no no no no no you have to let them handle it themselves
why because they're strong independent women and they don't need us another round please
you know you're the most progressive oligarch i think i've ever met
why the farmer's guilt here is so damn successful drinks
drinks all right let's call drinks like 50 fucking times i imagine a mountain of glasses oh yeah at
this point it's getting it's getting ridiculous all right let's cut back to the show wait hold up
hulky yeah just put an image are you watching twitch on light mode what so am i you monster
what's wrong with you yeah my eyes aren't i have astigmatism my eyes aren't as good as they used to be
i do too it helps me definitely the the shade final turn on dark mode fine turn the on you
fucking monster play the audio
oh my god oh my god i'm being castigated on twitter i gotta be here for another 40 minutes
at least at least what what is that beautiful blue drink you have hulky yeah that's a sour patch
cocktail are you okay with me showing oh my god showing the video folks please we're so far off the rails
at this point please show it look at this monster speaker can you tell noel to go and bring me my jack
and coke oh yeah i think i left it at y'all's place yeah you totally did yeah i'm about to go prepare
a drink get on it we're gonna go to the we're gonna go back to the ladies for a bit so you're
oh my god is it okay if we drink on stream is are we gonna get like car bombed well now that you said
it now that's a problem yeah yeah yeah way to go you are you are drinking tasty adult beverages called
dr pepper you know they're very adult dr pibner okay that's what you're drinking
i would never drink anything that had anything inside of it exactly at all i would never drink
anything ever yeah ever i am drinking jones soda i love jones soda my favorite carbonated beverage
and premium glass bottle soda they don't pay us enough grocery
we have been sponsored you see no okay let's jump back
the only drink sponsor we have is grind and go coffee
all right we're back so um lagertia yeah yeah tell me lagertia tell me how
what you're doing right just tell me what you're doing right now oh yeah so lagertia she's you know
she's hanging off of his arm there's a bird in her pocket screaming doing all that stuff in the
background and she's like oh don't go stretch those legs pop some buttons yeah go stretch your legs and
spread yourself all the other furniture oh my goodness and we can hang out later give the lady
what she wants she goes away i will i okay first of all sandal deckland immediately takes your advice
and undoes a button and has like a an audible sigh of relief like uh um also i just want to relay this
comment from chat that just reads i have to give it to thurston for making social encounters even
more painful than boss encounters hold on there is a knock at my door oh there's a drink that's noel
hi noel um all right narrative declaration we always have room service for our cast members
i am sure i'm so happy on the floor it's gonna be so great i'm gonna look at like the analytics
waiter waiter more awkward social interactions please you know someday someday we're all gonna
die i'm just thinking about that for some reason i'm gonna be balling out when i do this is chat it's
up to you to evangelize this episode is the best episode we will ever have
rock grind really went down here after the guy to go up to your social media and be like y'all
haven't seen art until you've seen episode you know four of season three of rock grind because that is
art guys i think the swamp just fucking rotted our brains we're done yes all right all right all right
all right let's get back to it let's get back to it the love of crawdadamus let's get on task
so true is is trying to help me now she's trying to get a buddy boy here to get up and stretch his
legs and start walking around to whether that's to limber up for activities later or or it's a
strange unity of it's a unity between women right now whatever the case she does seem to be trying
to help you oh thank god
the women are looking out for each other yeah i'm just gonna give sandal a smile and just come on
don't you want to come with me
uh where
don't you want to go get some air
oh yeah you know what yeah come on all right i'm gonna lean in close to licorice
he like liquefies off the bed and is momentarily on all fours before he gets up placing one hand on
the slight stage ahead of him and pulling himself up and he does this like he does it like he's trying
to be smooth like oh i'm just arching my back like and he does the whole like oh
mr creosote what the are we doing
what are we doing i want to make it worse is the couch leather oh yes
so what do you hear this like just peal
how did you do that
and there's like this
these two couples from the couch
there's just this slick stain on the couch
oh my god oh my god
look everybody i understand if you just leave the show at this point i'll i'll understand
i'm gonna i'm gonna super into it i'm oh i'm gonna lean into la gersha
girl go to the bathroom and threw up you just drink fucking belladonna you
fucking moron what what go throw up you idiot even her bird is shocked her bird is suddenly
quiet the bird that was screaming and she she turns and she goes sprinting she grabs her
skirts up and she takes off and you can see her already fingering the uvula at the back of her
throat as she's running to the bathroom oh my gosh bye girly i'll see you later
she's got it she's got it up to natural 20 ruled on behalf of lagertia um
lagertia will ignore that belladonna thank you very much oh my god
she's been micro dosing belladonna this whole time you know what's really funny thurston
she literally would have had to roll that because it's a dc 19.
yeah oh my god that's so funny she has a lot of practice feeding her birds at home
wow that's awful she's all right back to the floor i go
she's she literally did the princess bride bit where it's just like i've been building up her
resistance to belladonna for my whole life people have been trying to poison me for being repugnant
for years you know i've been saying for a long time that the rock grind crew needs the six character
lagertia welcome bring do not bring this npc back ever again we're gonna be we're gonna be calling her
constantly lagertia's about to come live in the people's house she's our new bestie
he's the people's concubine conspirator acquired
frock freak
lover of big chungus embracer of birds
i wish i had a glass can't wait for the chapter and boss to be lagertia oh okay she's all right
let's we got 30 minutes left we have plenty more time to drink god knows i do i can't it's so true
okay so yeah i'm i'm going to sandal manages to pull himself up the like two foot
thing on the stage doing kind of like a half hearted like i'm just sort of turning myself
over to sit and pull myself up but really i was about to fall and then he stands up on the stage and
is like
pauses momentarily breathes and then reaches out a hand and looks at you and says uh milady
what a gentleman i'm gonna take the hand don't you want to go somewhere a bit more private
uh the balcony over there
gotcha
come on
uh-huh
and that's when immediately as you walk out onto the balcony vena uh you notice that the gnome
punkle comp stops as soon as he sees sandal walk out here
uh um i did some stuff and then he sits down
uh do you uh do you like the air here
it's great
do you want to uh go stand by the fountain and he points south to like this bubbling fountain that's
on the balcony here
of course
of course
okay
me too
yeah yeah yeah
oh look it's a fountain
that's lovely
you want to get out of here
what we just got here
i hate you god
do i need to spell it out for you
well letters weren't my 40.
oh boy why don't we go somewhere alone you and i would you like that
and as you say that something cuts through the air
oh sandal my good friend would you
to come bring your new companion and look at this fine view jesus christ as the hegemon speaks
of course he talks like that and sandal has like vena give me a perception check actually
yeah i roll a nat one and fall into the fountain i can't wait it's so good
oh never mind what do you roll 19 and one are so close our total total 31 thank you yeah um
vena you immediately tell that when like this man speaks this the hegemon um sandal like has
this moment of like oh shit sobriety his eyes become like more alert and he like grabs you by your
hand and is like oh we should we should go over there yeah come on sure i'd love to go talk to the hegemon
oh and as you like approach the side of the balcony like a lot of the people here
begin to like just take distinct note and start to how shall i put it
fuck off immediately out of this room
they begin like rushing out in towards the open area uh even punkle comp and his and his like little
current coterie go into the room in fact punkle comp does he leaves like closes the door behind him
um there's just this like sudden like oh shit stuff's happening and people just depart
um and then the the doors are all sort of closed here
and the hegemon this red-haired imperious individual turns to look at you vena and vena
you can see at this point that actually uh one other person departs madam broke myer quickly
escapes um escapes um vena you can tell that as the hegemon is looking at you sandal has like turned
over the balcony and is just looking away um and seems to like be distancing himself from everything
oh
it's such a pleasure to see you again vali was it yeah so glad you recognize me
what do you think of the view here and he takes a step back and sort of ushers you towards like the
edge of the balcony oh i don't know it's pretty high up
yes i like high vantage points and then you have like this brief flashback to the hegemon on top of
the chainsaw car can i ask to what i owe this pleasure sir
i wanted to talk to you i wanted to talk to all of your friends but they all seem so scared
no not scared just eager to get drunk which i very much am in this moment sandal could you go
get me a fucking glass of he vomits over the side of the balcony all right as one does been there anyway
so what did you want i'm sure i can pass along the message to my friends or call them inside
outside
what are you doing
enjoying a party is that illegal
that's not why you're here what are you doing
sorry
let's cut through the jib jab social
dueling that would happen no i want to know what you're doing here is it for that
thing
uh as sandal continues to just um extricate himself over the edge
is that why you're here some people are apparently into that
he rolls his eyes oh please
i try to be a good person
do you yes
i do i pride myself on it in fact
really yes and i would hope that whatever you're doing here is not causing
well more problems in the city
of course not
you know one of the uh
driving philosophies of my people is to uh really just help the common man and
outset has a lot of common people that need happen that need helping
so that's what we're here for
really sorry if you think we have some kind of untoward intention here
we're nothing if not servants of this city as i'm sure you are
there's like the slightest smile from the hegemon at that and then a
look at you and a look at sandal like vomiting over the side do you want his airhip is that it
his airship yes i know that's what you materially possess you you want airships it's your thing
i wouldn't say no to an airship but no that's not why i'm here
besides if i wanted his airship then i would have approached this very differently
i have an airship i wouldn't even bothered with this fucking party i would have stolen it
ah i see uh so someone sent you here no i'm here on oh yes
uh oh god would lie to me apply here let's see
uh well he's not is he trying to deceive me i guess i wouldn't know that yet
um he's analyzing your deception so
oh another 19 plus 16 that is a 35 for you thurston cool um
there is like a stare into you all right then i apologize for the problems below it seems you've
recuperated from that though to be fair it was only your winged friend that was the
real recipient even indirectly of what i did your situation was entirely due to some prior association
with a man an elven man
ah yes well duchelf is in ashes and a swamp
good good good good and i don't want to keep any hard feelings between us and your winged friend
so please take this he hands you a small pouch
i'm gonna peek cautiously into it full of gold oh
interesting so your winged friend tell him we're even
i don't think so he stops between the two like stone tables as he begins walking away
there's an audible sigh uh that is only broken by the
from sandal deckland thank you sandal you know how to create an ambiance he sure does
i don't want your fucking money you killed my friend
you're gonna have to do a hell of a lot more to make up for it
he turns around stares at you momentarily and then begins to speak in a very clipped tone
tell me what have you done you have created an insurrection in this city you have caused numerous
deaths both the tyrants guild and the local population your attempts at whatever your allies
consider to be revolution are nothing more than a base misunderstanding of the city's governance and the
abilities and various shrugs slightly the various opportunities available to the city and yet you
indicate that you are some sort of champions for justice i don't believe so i believe you
and your allies are a threat if anything it's my understanding that you came into this place and
looked for various opportunities to kill people myself included perhaps at some point you should look
into a mirror and decide if you are being the just people or otherwise good day miss vena he begins
to walk away hmm hi there baby i'm mr hegemon as he opens the twin double doors and ponkelcompt is
there like clearly having listening listened in and the hegemon just sort of waves no not today and
paul like quickly closes the doors behind
ah
i'm
i'm
i'm
the
ball of vena
uh-huh
can you hold my hair
one condition
oh god
you tell me
you tell me
what the fuck the medics guild is doing
you i know
you i know that you know you're going to tell me
as you say that the the cat folk advances towards you
not another step
he's not going to be hurt
i just have a couple of things that i need to know and then i'll hold his hair
why don't you go inside and get a drink
my feline friend
she takes another step challenging you
so i i just would like to say
yes from the moment it became apparent that
volley was going to go outside onto the balcony and people were filtering out
i think it would beggar belief to imagine that we would not be on our way especially if then
the cat man bodyguard
and hazard give me a give me a fortitude save
sure
yeah about to say you want you you want us to all do that because we're probably not going to be
sitting around yeah this uh alcohol would be considered a diseases poisons radiation etc
yeah poison yeah
oh breastplate adds
so for for rolls
it's okay
sorry sorry i don't want to say let me that for podcasts and then do your thing uh oran got a 28
uh uh who i got a 34 uh 10 hours i got a natural one now not for you i'm sorry for podcast yeah
so for some reason my fortitude saving throw is factoring in my breastplate to this
i take it that's a no right one sec why
that shouldn't when you when if the window shows up does it say like armor penalty or
something that's no i literally just one sec one sec does your does your breastplate have resilience
on it now oh it might ding ding that would be why because if you have a resilient breastplate
that adds to all of your saves uh it just says it's magical i don't know if it has that or not
one sec if it's magical i will check give the roll it is a
plus one resilient yeah that's why okay cool i'm fine yep
sorry all right yeah 29 so oran brisp redwood and baldrick you are all
enjoying the camaraderie here you're you're having a good time now speaker d tan hauser
mm-hmm oh god i love it i get to use one of these uber specific ones oh this is always good you
don't encourage it we don't encourage it i'm doing it no you're encouraging it right now thurston by
putting on that breathy tone i know but literally this this one was called a certified tan hauser moment
um so how could i not but don't do it seriously we ignored these 99 of the time um
give me a d20 plus your intelligence modifier okie dokie uh let's see what is my end that's right
that's an eight okay you believe that the best course of action at this point in a certified
ten hauser moment is to keep drinking clearly you're making inroads with this individual
so you are hushing down any other discussion what what more hell palm you're gonna keep drinking with
more hell palm you're thinking that you're making inroads with this this npc and you're just gonna
keep drinking with him so please give a boisterous speech on why the dwarven head of the farmers guild
is your new best friend i i don't know that that feels very out of character is there okay like spending uh
a hero point on re-rolling that or ignoring the is there uh i would i i don't think that's a good
complication because it's forcing speaker to do something he doesn't want to do is there something
we can change it that occurs and do some role play that he wants to do i mean yes but i'm not going to
let you like quickly shift away from this you've you've failed a save rather significantly right yeah
so you know you we can get the negative outcome for this i just if you have a different negative
outcome feel free oh okay uh i guess i'll just be drunk then can you give me like a poison condition
or what have you oh yeah you basically like have the equivalent of like a sickened condition sure
cool um as you're kind of just like overtaken by some of the the the intoxicants that are in your
system okay um yeah so uh what where are we doing because we would have started making these moves
earlier so like where in the process are we at this point it's just been like drinks being ordered and
more hell is kind of this this like you know very um persuadable like oh tell me about yourself
what's with the the thing on the face and like points to your mask apparatus well you see my friend
i obtained this faceplate after being ripped apart by the machines of war in the deserts of the dominion
and if you will excuse me i believe it actually behooves all of us gentlemen to immediately begin
applying such bloody lessons in preparation for whatever is occurring on that balcony if you'll
excuse me and uh i will start moving i presume others will as well yeah bulgic's gonna take the
the door to the door to the north and i will enter forward this way i will wait for this tyrant's guard to
try and stop me yeah you tell us where we stop thurston you keep moving okay sure
oren basically just takes all the shock guys and um and he goes like hey thanks for all these drinks
i need to go get some fresh hair oh yeah no problem
he's like well i'll be back for i'll be back for more and he'll tap him on the back and then fall along
with baldry okay yeah so as you walk out onto the balcony um and like each of you sort of take a
different approach to it um you can see that you know vena's there alone with sandal deckland but also
the like the the the cat folk who's been guarding him and sandals just kind of like um but you come out to
this exactly where we left off on venus side
i was muted i'm just gonna that would do it i'm gonna yeah i'm gonna turn to the cat folk just
can you give me just a second my friend i just really need to have this conversation with mr deckland
so please why don't you tell me what you know and then i'll hold your hair and we'll walk back
inside together okay okay baldrick's gonna open the door and he's gonna have an he's gonna quickly
put together an alchemist fire moderate and is going to gesture to the guard hey why don't you stay where
you are and i'm gonna i guess i'll intimidate the guard you're giving intimidation check
fuck yeah oh fuck i forgot i'm not victrix oh no uh i could i possibly uh assist with this
i have a decent intimidation if you want to take the action too uh
uh um i i should probably save it for persuasion i suppose yeah 13 is not gonna get me much yeah
no not against this individual
uh all right um yeah i'll let i'll let the rest of my friends kind of congregate in
sure you know even if for who is just gonna sit there i guess
rua's gonna ask uh ask our gentleman here so i i hate to kind of put a damper on things but
do you have like a business card i really need to learn how to up my cooking skills before i go
i'd hate to leave empty-handed you you know how that is cooking that's right
okay so first with cooking it's all about temperature
see what i mean temperature temperature okay okay after that
come to the farmer's guild i'll show you around okay i didn't learn much but i'll take you up on that
later it'll slap him on the back oh do you hear like a tree i know because i'm mostly made of wood and
metal what yeah and he'll walk away okay yeah yeah wait no i need to go this way
like turns to you oren you got some good friends kid is he talking to himself because i left
uh for some reason your token's still standing beside him in my screen so not on mine
i think you're just hallucinating him
there's like a standee there like a cutout board of oran just saying yeah i got it there's a log wearing a hood
he did a he did a fucking like shadow clone some shit from naruto yeah substitution
standal recovers himself and looks at you vena
uh medic skill my my grandpa did some stuff with the medic skills that's good so why don't you tell me
what they were doing in the solitude the whatitude where can i talk to your grandpa
he's dying
okay excellent
oh man yeah we we were told to just look for stuff having to do with the medic's guild correct that was
our goal i'm not i'm not told to figure out how sandal might be involved in schemes that could affect
the city the medic's guild stuff is from your own personal knowledge okay so your grandpa works for the
medic's guild okay is there any way i could speak to him or is he completely kaput
um as you do that you feel a hand on your shoulder coming from the cat folk
all right do you work for this guy
you hear a voice but it's not spoken aloud it's in your mind that will be enough you can go now
not until i learn what i'm here to learn what do you know about this guy huh are you turning to her
yes do you know who you're working for several individuals appear out of thin air oh
finally it's an even fight
the cat folk continues to keep their hand on your shoulder you can go now no blood needs to be spilled
today who do you work for
sorry
i work for this man and you will go now
i think you work for something else
listen blood doesn't have to be spilled you're right you tell me what i'm asking and we will go
on our way
i could use the medic's guild right now
i'm going to give the cat folk a look like really you're working for him
at this point this is more of an impugnment on you like just your standards and employer you
should have higher standards for yourself
he just looks at you i would prefer not to have combat today
i wouldn't if i were you either you would die
you can't hear she is telepathically communicating to vena my apologies i thought that she was uh
i thought she was like a mind flayer like open channel no
hmm i'm gonna get a look at the uh the uniforms of the people around here just kind of looking
around assessing the situation um just kind of society please
society and i will say one of my feats is uh criminal connection
absolutely uh i don't know if that will affect my dc at all
uh so society uh my society's terrible could i give you lore underworld perhaps
oh i'll allow that sure yeah because i imagine these people are criminals and if they aren't then
i'll give you a society
oh happy with that no no i'm not want to change that with a hero point yeah go on
oh oh my god it's cocked on my screen it looks like an 18 oh but it's a two
you have no idea who these individuals are
okay all right so no no familiarity and no like are even if i don't know what the like uniforms look
like are they wearing like a distinct uniform or anything like that you have enough to know that
they are like they are garbed um in like very combat fitting attire so they all have sort of
distinct clothing that you can't quite um well you could give me a society check for that um but like
several of them are currently wielding like double-bladed sort of curved daggers others are in a like
martial arts stance like they're getting ready to kick and or punch at a moment's notice oh my god we
got fucking kung fu in here uh i can give you a society for um for the the clothes that's not good
either they are a 17 is enough for you to tell that like this has like hallmark traits of like kwan sheer
attire okay okay so like from the the continent to the west
okay very interesting i'm gonna turn to sandal where'd you hire these people
uh book book
like did you just find them in the phone book you guys are in the phone book i'm gonna look at the the
the the cat folk you guys are just in the phone book or pops up he looks at you you can go now
he starts like walking around you and sort of like puts her arm under sandals ah thank you
i i want you to know thurston real quick if anyone other than the cat folk makes any move at this
point baldrick is gonna throw something at them yeah absolutely light them all up the cat folk is
very like methodically leading sandal out of here
oh i'm gonna stand in his way oh okay excuse me gentlemen i don't think we've been properly introduced
cat folk looks at you
doesn't say anything i'm afraid this is a matter that can't be solved by simply walking out of here
if you take another step i'll have you flayed
now would be an excellent time for us to speak or failing that for you all to die
that would be a good intimidate that would be a really good intimidate
give me an intimidate please absolutely
please for the love of god please god all right rock nanite surge let's go
uh i will hero point that because there is no way on earth that isn't enough
uh continue my name yes there we go 30 there we go 18
she somewhat recoils a bit from you like taken aback um like it's not enough to get her to like hand over
her master though um and she seems more like this has stalled her slightly
are you familiar with the gate the great cataclysm of the black wind
there is no response
it was an event in the dominion's history
explosive archaeo tech taken from the zescoran empire
it was said that an entire span of a town was vaporized in an instant isn't that interesting
and wouldn't it be dreadful of such a thing or to be employed here
in your midst perhaps if my heart were to stop on the off chance you achieved victory no my friend
you have no choice but diplomacy or battle um and i'd like to make another intimidate
all right uh if you prefer i could use lore warfare or zescoran um
you can give me another intimidate if you want i'll give it to you uh i might never mind
there we go there we go that's just what we need yeah she she stares at you she is like suitably just
like holy fuck this guy is is something and what she does in response is she like pulls her master back
a wise choice now diplomacy or the alternative i can't be the only one speaking here when you have
information i need and i live unwilling to strip you of everything you have for it
the cat folk opens her mouth and you notice she has no tongue
i see
and sandal decides to uh unleash another torrent of his um insides how much crap does this dude have
in his system most of it's just like thank you it's a fat man's world
we've been ah hello everybody oh as panklecompt comes through
hey we're a little busy friend we'll come talk to you later okay bye bye
rahua
rahua will follow in behind panklecompton very firmly claw into his shoulder i thought you're just about to
pick him up and just toss him there oh no our friend has listened to so much of this conversation
and he will very coldly pivot his head downwards towards panklecompt i think it's in our best interest
if he sees it through i'm i'm a skilled medic i can help him oh we i'm with the medics guild
how old are you now dig his his talon and oh that really hurts
the old lady comes up to orin and baldrick
uh baldrick's gonna turn towards her you still got his
eyes on the uh the backup that has mysteriously appeared arm raised with alchemist fire in hand
but he is going to turn slightly so she can see a single eye pointed at her through the slit
are you going to cause an issue here we have no intention of it but we would like some information
can i save you some time and some unwanted bloodshed what is it you need to know
uh i presume that everyone else can hear this as well or is she just no she's being very quiet to you
and orin we're trying to figure out exactly what this uh individual as he's pointing towards sandal
declin we need to figure out what his plans are with regards to the uh oh it was the governance
right yeah how he's in like how he's influencing current events in the assembly and like just the
city at large we're trying to figure out how he's influencing the assembly at the moment as well
as whatever else he might be planning
uh
the old sort of crone lady leans in a bit
sandal declin is a useless nobody he has more money than brains it's how he can hire the gudule
all right so then kindly explain how that doesn't affect the assembly or anything else
plenty of plenty of brainless people sit on that couch he's building an airship
for what purpose
the the old woman stares at vena back at you women
foreign turns to baldrick i think we have the wrong guy mr baldry
he's gonna sigh in a guttural manner now if i may
you're all skilled i know you've dealt with deg sanren house you killed the martinet very good
those people out there will put you to the test you don't want to do it here
we have no intention of picking a fight if we can avoid it we're just trying to get some information
and buzz ball over there is making a kind of well fuck it fine do whatever you want and she turns
and walks away from you hops off the stage and starts walking okay whatever
okay damn lady
i can't tell if that was thirst and being fed up with us no no that was very much her
regardless he is going to take that on note
or we go escalating this any further
how about we try and speak to this fellow's granddad then first huh
well we've also got a friend with the medics guild so why don't we all sit down and have a chat huh
i do have it on good authority that you are at the very least now confirmed to be connected via this
eternal relationship engaging in experiments regarding the rot
that is the city's interest as well as ours and i have no doubt that it is similar curiosity with such
things that has allowed the tyrants guild to overlook the presence of four terrorist revolutionaries
at the gala that are willing to do what they cannot to save public face
now then we can have a conversation you can hand over your charge
or we can continue this date we've all made with the butcher's block
do you want the gnome
what what did you say you're slurring no stand up you want the gnome the gnome is he more than a
charlatan i don't have the gnome
pongo whatever go talk to them okay mr deckland
rihua will not let go of pongo comes i'm not moving beyond a five-foot radius of you
oh good just like spinning on his axis yeah just like turning he just so happens to have switched
to the side of rihua with the even sharper metal hand oh
free time i want to go
sleep i want to go sleep but bulgark's gonna flag down tanhauser tanhauser i don't think this boob is who we
want
well he's clearly got some
important connections i'm willing to believe that this imbecile has no more masterminded his
digestive system or the ability to read than he has whatever endeavor we are here to solve
what i'm curious about are these armed gangsters the one with no mouth i assume they're all
equally as silent or at the very least perhaps they're simply dumb
no she can speak
huh i'm gonna tap my head
the vault doesn't quite understand what the fuck she means
i imagined our conversation
uh i'm gonna how much money did um
uh that had probably didn't give me enough to pay off this uh this grouping away now
now he's starting she's starting to walk so yeah i would i would step in her way before she got far
because we haven't finished our conversation that she has okay so you're stepping in her way yeah of
course okay
she looks at you she turns to ask you do i have to hit her with another intimidate to get her to speak to me
she she's not speaking to you well yeah there's something yeah you can communicate and none of her
com peers seem able to communicate and she's not using any kind of
like seems to have no intentions of answering my questions so do i need to hit her with another
intimidate or like someone else could step in it's clear to the point of she's not going to like
give up someone she is like incredibly incredibly like linked to i i i understand that but she's also not
willing to tell us who she is she's not speaking to you correct yeah yeah so would anyone like to
come in and help this not be a combat situation i i don't know would i would i have to roll intimidate
again to get a conversation i i will admit thurston this is kind of beggaring a little belief right now
this this is literally a case of she can sure communicate mentally maybe once and has used that already
okay that if you want the metagaming reason there it is but you could say like oh you would you'd like
to make this i don't know man fucking like that's i'm sorry it's just like this is a little hard
at this point yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna step in with vena and just if you need to communicate through me
you're welcome to i will tell tannhauser what you would like to say to him
he shakes her head like the expiration window has expired on me communicating with you i see
hmm and is this a condition shared between all of your compeers you're all sworn to silence
like you it's very like like some of them like open their mouths very quickly and like reveal yes
they they cannot speak oh the love of oh that's grand and violent do you have a business card
well i have one all right give me your business card sandal deckland provides a card thank you oh it's
a little sticky put it in my back pocket i think we've accomplished everything we're going to
accomplish without murdering them all let's speak to ponsel comp and hope he has something that we need
and should we find that you are all holding out on us we'll meet again and you'll see one last kidding
about the bomb one last question mr declan where's that amazing airship of yours docked
oh where's it going to be over the rocks blaster thank you so much you have a great day okay um
i uh i'd like to to allow this to kind of wrap up i just would ask since it might as well behoove me
is there anything i can roll to try to identify a you know a circle of people they all have no tongues
they seem highly ritualistic yeah underworld lore um society society i can take society because i i
heard what they were but i didn't have anything to make that one 29 um you've heard like organizations
of kwan shiri assassins that tend to take this kind of approach um it's very common in that end of the
woods typically um they like have communication between themselves and their client and that's it
okay so um are they usually just bodyguards or do they usually carry around and like oh well you'll
usually see kwan shiri hanging out with this mafia or uh they're so see about this or that um you're not
like like it kind of varies per organization like this isn't enough for you to get like a sense of the
the specific organization here um they're probably like a rare organization that is fairly like
hidden um but you'd know like yeah you've heard of like these type of assassins before where they
they take on this approach and it's very intentional to prevent them from negotiating or making you know
agreements or giving information that their patron isn't providing i see okay and in this case when their
patron is a giant roving dick hole who is super drunk it's really infuriating uh certainly um what
kind of context would i know these assassins to be employed if i like i mean even if i don't know
generally right like everything like would i know at least two instances of them being used
um like certainly they've been utilized as bodyguards before typically for high-ranking members of you know
nations in the inheritor lands have used them um they're sort of like renowned as boogeymen um
they're they're really what they're notable for is that they can be bodyguards but then if someone
exerts pressure on an individual they can be used to reach out and touch those individuals
hmm i see okay um uh do we want to see if sandal deckland's holding out on us or do we want to let
them go no i want to let them go this is yeah this this is already turned long enough i believe
yeah i agree yeah i think that he's probably uh the the red herring the fat herring the fat true
yes uh and with that like the group sort of like closes around him and they all sort of like we
make their way out uh leaving you with poor ponkle comp um and like as a almost uh insidious ending
to our episode infillium videre walks up and just closes the door to the to the main entrance leaving
the rest of you to uh to have a fine conversation with ponkle comped on the balcony i i i hope that
the infillium slips their bro rahua thumbs up through the door kill everyone um and i think
that is where we will end today's episode all right chat everyone i hope you all had a fantastic
time today thank you all so much for watching this exciting episode of rock grind and reintroducing
all the amazing people who bring you this show starting out with odo roshi oh it's me i am odo i
was playing veena the silk swashbuckler and ultimate ally to women she's uh also bird kidnapper
yeah you guys have a great night next up we have hulky crow that's me i'm hulky crow i played
rahua the party animal and frat beast kanrasu cleric you can find me on my usual socials of
twitter i'm not calling it its new name at hulky crow as well as on discord by the same name
and most other places at again that same username i had a absolute blast playing i'm so happy we got
back to actually doing this love your faces then there is the ever amazing erondale
howdy i have been playing as baldrick weathers he's an alchemist you've seen it you've experienced
it you've heard the explosions next time maybe who knows uh you can meet me on twitter at
arondaleo and that's it i'll see you next time and then we have the other star what speaker t
excellent hi there i've been speaker t you can find me on twitter for now at super snake kick you can watch
all of the excellent things that we make with alphabusa and over popening on alphabusa's channel
and you can find the bodies at a latitude and longitude that i will not
and then there's thurston
hello hi my name's thurston um
go check out our patreon for the starfinder game that we have it's really cool you should go
check that out also big thanks to froggy lock for
for coming in and doing that today oh my gosh that was a funny funny thing
loggy frog um anyways
bam right there otherwise you can find me on all the things at on call gm i appreciate you i appreciate
everybody i'm gonna be out next week but i'll be back in two weeks for our next episode we'll see you
then of course i have been your host and your oran stricks druid for this evening thank you all so much
chat remember you can watch us live at twitch.tv forward slash uh narrative declaration of course
anything narrative declaration you'll be able to find us there so that thank you all so very much
stall for time because my music file disappeared of course well if you thought this was a great
i am so happy to introduce you all the world of bible man next episode hey but seriously the
second episode of veggie tales was called god wants me to thank god i found it anyway i love y'all
very much we'll see you all next time so long farewell
you