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Welcome to The Health & Wellness Practitioners Podcast! Dr. Danielle and other guest experts talk about everything from getting your practice started, developing your clinical skills, growing your practice YOUR way, and dealing with the real stuff life burnout and work/life balance. Whether you’ve been practicing for decades or just started your journey, you’ll find something here for you!
Dr. Danielle:
Welcome to the Health and Wellness Practitioners podcast. I am your host, Dr. Danielle Angela. In this show, I and my guest experts will talk about everything from getting your practice started to developing your clinical skills, growing your practice your way, and of course, dealing with the real stuff like burnout and work-life balance. Whether you've been practicing for decades or just started your journey, you'll find something here for you. So take a deep breath and enjoy the show.
Dr. Danielle:
I have a new guest to the show today. Her name is Kara McKeage, and we are going to be talking about ditching the shame around getting household help, household support. Very hot topic in my opinion, . We'll start off today though with the rapid fire questions. So, Kara, question number one is why did you choose a career path that you're on?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, so I was a stay-at-home mom for eight years and wanted a, you know, to get back into the workforce when my son started school. And he got part-time kindergarten, so I was like, what am I gonna do with two and a half hours a day? And so I started doing some personal assistant work and just really loved it and that's what, you know, started the company. So 11 years later we're growing and thriving. So
Dr. Danielle:
Awesome. That's a long time to be in distance. And I'm assuming too that there's been a lot of transition and growth in your company from what you might have just started, you know, to like fill some time while you're little one was at school to now being a, something much more than that.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, definitely.
Dr. Danielle:
Next question is, what fills you up?
Kara McKeage:
You know, work-wise, one of my favorite things that I do is the matching process between a client and a personal assistant. Like nothing makes me happier than both of them being super excited to work with each other. We just had a all team meeting and asked the team to go around and share their win for the year, and every single one of 'em talked about how much they loved their client and loved supporting them. And it just, I was quite emotional during the, the meeting cuz it just was like my, a dream come true for me. So yeah, I love that.
Dr. Danielle:
Awesome. Okay, great. Question number three is, what do you like the least about running a business? This is my favorite question.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. For me it's definitely the day-to-day weeds stuff. And I, I'm really good at outsourcing , so I have a team of people that, you know, I've hired, you know, obviously a bookkeeper was the first hire cuz that is something that I'm definitely not good at. And now I have a whole management team and everything that helps. So I like to focus on the big, you know, business development and, you know, how we can improve and those kind of things is what fills me up too, so,
Dr. Danielle:
Yes. . Okay. Question four. What book do you think that every person should read?
Kara McKeage:
Well, my new favorite book that I just found out about a couple weeks ago is fair play. I don't know if you've heard of it, but it is every like couple needs to get that book. It's, it's I'm still listening to the audio book, but it talks about, you know, how to make it fair to share the workload at home with your partner. And there's like a whole game with cards where you can go through and say, you know, which, which tasks are important to us as a couple and who's gonna own them. And the biggest thing is that it's all about owning it from beginning to end. You know, whoever is holding that task is doing the planning execution, making sure, you know, the follow through is done. And it's just, it's something that I've always been aware of and so it was really cool to find a book that, you know, really did a deep dive into it.
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. And that's a very relevant topic for the work that you do and how you, how you support your clients as well.
Kara McKeage:
Exactly. Yeah.
Dr. Danielle:
Great. All right, last question in the rapid fire round is, on a scale of zero to 10, how crunchy are you?
Kara McKeage:
I am not all that crunchy I was at one time, but yeah, I, I probably need to, to up it on the crunchy scale .
Dr. Danielle:
Well, I mean, I think for me personally, you know, I would love to say like, oh, I'm 22 outta 10, but the reality is that I have children and as they get older, they have their own opinions about what they want to have in the house and what they're willing to eat and not willing to eat. So yeah, I've had to also like, just kind of let go of my rigid expectations and loosen up a little bit while also in, you know, doing the best that they can to protect their health and their,
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. When my boys were little, it was a lot easier right. To be like, red Dye number 40 is not coming in the house, but they're 17 and 19 now, with cars, so there's Yeah. It's out of my control now, so.
Dr. Danielle:
Exactly. Yeah. And, and when my kids were younger, I thought like, oh, they're going to be like such healthy teenagers, they won't want soda. But now with my 12 year old, it's almost become a, like a game in a way for her that like, if she can get access to Dr. Pepper, then she, she'll, she loves it, she loves a taste of it, so she wants it. And then I'm like, no, you can't have soda. We don't drink soda in our house. And she's like, well, I'm not drinking soda in the house. I hadn't at school.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. I, I will have to say my 19 year old just recently said to me, he was like, I used to really resent that all the kids had, you know, like cakes and candies and cookies and their lunches, and I had my peanut butter sandwich and carrots, and he goes, but now I really appreciate it, you know, and so it, it does pay off .
New Speaker:
SIGNS THAT YOU NEED TO HIRE SUPPORT AT HOME
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. Good. Okay. So let's talk more about delegating household tasks. Most of the people that listen to this podcast are women who own their own businesses, so this is a very relevant topic because we often feel like we're doing it all and we're doing it all on our own.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah.
Dr. Danielle:
I know that one of the things that you do speak about is signs that people need to hire support. What are some of the signs that someone needs to hire support at home?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, I think you know, one of the biggest things is if you're feeling overwhelmed that's usually a good sign that you know, you need some support and, you know, we feel like we have to do it all, or we should be able to do it all. And I'm here to tell you, we don't have to do it all. , you know, and outsourcing as much as you can afford is a really important thing for self-care. You know, we talk about bubble baths and manicures, but really delegating is a huge form of self-care. You need to create that space, you know, and the the mental load that women carry you know, of managing a household can be outsourced.
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. And what, where did that expectation come from that we should be able to do it all on our own? Right. I don't, I don't know, but that's certainly a belief that many of us hold that like, well, I should be able to do all of this myself. And maybe it's because of, you know, how our society has evolved where we live in single family homes and we're generally like parents and children at most, or living you know, solo without generations living together, without, together we don't live in community.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. That's, I think a big part of it is not having that village, you know, to lean on. Also our society has just changed rapidly, right. Over the last two generations in particular where, you know, we're, we're trying to find our place, I think as women of, you know, where we fit in with work and home and ourselves, you know, is is a, a big one too. So I think we're finding the the happy medium , you know, of, of life. So,
Dr. Danielle:
So besides feeling overwhelmed, what's another sign that someone should consider household supports?
Kara McKeage:
I think one of the like really big critical ones of like, you need to figure this out right away is if you're feeling resentful. You know, which I hear a lot of from women of like, even if somebody's helping with the dishes, you know, you're still having to ask, you know, you're still managing everything. And you know, it can be really toxic to your health, to relationships with your family you know, and so to have a personal assistant in the home can be really helpful because that person's kind of taking on the mental load, you know, the goal is that they know what you need before you do and you know, you can build that relationship long term so that they're taking care of things without you even asking and bring a lot of relief.
New Speaker:
WHAT DOES A PERSONAL ASSISTANT DO IN YOUR HOME?
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. So could you talk a bit about what a personal assistant might do in your home?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. so I would say probably our most popular tasks are laundry , you know, doing start to finish, right? Getting the laundry put away like that, that's a hard one for people. Like, nobody, you know, wants to deal with the laundry that's piled up. And so that's, you know, some of our clients are like, oh, it feels like, you know, fairy godmother came in, and that's just like magically all put away . The other one is vendor management, so, you know getting somebody in to do quotes, you know, for things that might need to be repaired or you know, if you need a new furnace or, you know, those kind of emergency things that happen. It's nice to have somebody else who's doing the calls and, you know, meeting with the, the vendor to get the quotes and then can save you, here's the best one, here's why I picked it. You don't have to, you know, figure it out. It's just like when you have that trust built, you know, you're just like, great, get it taken care of, you know, and it's like every mom has, you know, decision fatigue and to have somebody else who's taking that one and you just have to say yes or no is, is a really great thing.
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah, I hear that for sure. Okay, so besides laundry and vendor management, what else?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah I mean, there's a whole bunch of stuff that we can do. You know pet care is a really big one, you know, making sure the, the dog gets the flea meds once a month and you know, is getting their immunizations. And another really popular one is meal prep, you know, so everything from actually planning out the meals to doing the grocery shopping to, you know, prepping it. Some people like to cook and so they like it all prepped and ready to go. Or some people are like, give me a crockpot meal to come home to , and, you know, you can have that family dinner and none of of it was your responsibility, you know, . So that's, that's an exhausting part of being a mother, is that the meal planning for me personally. So you know, it's nice to have that. Trying to think what other, you know, things like Amazon returns and going to Costco, you know a lot of people really appreciate that they never have to step into Costco again, you know? So yeah, all the errands, chores vendor management, those are, are really big ones, so
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. Awesome. Yeah, so it's kind of like what I would normally say, especially for the women that are chiropractors. I don't know that this is a theme for all the other types of health and wellness professions. Exactly. Although I know actually now that I said it out loud, it's also relevant in acupuncture that the traditional model of success is you know, generally created by men. It was designed by men, and oftentimes men that have wives or do have wives at home and the wives are taking care of the kids in the house and all the things that you've just listed. And of course then the men can be successful in their, in their entrepreneurial endeavors because they don't have to worry about all of this other stuff, and they can give a lot of time and energy to the growth of their business. Whereas so many women feel like we have to be the one that is the primary caregivers for our children. Also, the primary person responsible for all the household stuff and also trying to grow a business. And it, yes, it's exhausting. It's not surprising. Then when we look at the statistics on burnout for women in chiropractic or women across health and wellness professions as a whole, it's very high.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah,
Dr. Danielle:
It's very high.
Kara McKeage:
Well, and where's the time for yourself? You know, all those things you just listed too. It's like, where's the fun for you, , you know, things that fill you up and bring you joy as well. So
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah,
Kara McKeage:
It's a lot.
New Speaker:
CAN I AFFORD TO HIRE HOUSEHOLD SUPPORT?
Dr. Danielle:
So how does someone know that they have the budget available, I suppose mm-hmm. to begin to hire household support?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, so that is one of the things that, it just kind of depends on where you live and what the tasks are that you're looking for. It can be quite affordable, especially people that are used to having like a nanny. You know, it's, it's kind of the typically the same cost. You know, so if your kids are a little older and you know, don't need a nanny anymore, it might be a good time to get some support in the house. But, you know, it can range. It definitely, you know, having a personal assistant isn't just for the rich and famous , you know, you can have that necessity as well, you know, to, to get the support in the home. So yeah, there's ways that you can kind of look up like what the going rate is.
Kara McKeage:
Typically, it is pretty close to what a nanny rate is. Obviously if it's more in depth like household manager that's working full-time, those people are gonna require more. But you know, you can get a lot of times you know, what I recommend is kind of looking at your neighborhood groups or talking to your friends and seeing if anybody uses somebody or you know, a great resource can be stay-at-home moms who you are looking for like a little extra spending money and their kids are in school and you know, they're looking for those mom hours, you know, between nine and two to, to do something, you know? And obviously they're great at running a household , so that's, they can be a win-win for sure.
New Speaker:
HOW TO WORK THROUGH VULNERABILITY
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. Awesome. And I know that this is a thing that holds a lot of people back from even getting started with, especially household support. I think it can be one thing to hire someone to support you in your business, especially when you're just getting started, right? To hire a front desk assistant or a virtual assistant and to hire someone that supports you in your home can come vulnerability.
Kara McKeage:
Mm-Hmm. . Yeah.
Dr. Danielle:
How do we work through that?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. that is very fair. You know, and I think there's a couple of things. One is just getting really clear about what it is that you're looking for. You know, kind of start a mind dump of like, what are the things you wanna get off your plate? And that's, that's a really good place to start because then you make sure you're hiring the right person who, you know, knows exactly what they're getting into and making sure that they're a good fit. Obviously you wanna do background check reference checks you know, a big part of what we do, we do placement nationwide, and we really deep dive into the family to get to know them and their needs, how their household runs, who's in the household, you know, all of that. And, you know, asking the questions to make sure that we get the right fit, like what's worked before with a nanny or an executive assistant at work, what hasn't.
Kara McKeage:
And then we do the same thing with, with the candidate, you know, of just really getting to know them and making sure that, you know, it's gonna be the perfect long-term fit. But it, it definitely is very vulnerable having somebody in your home for a lot of people and, you know, feed feedback is really important. So if you know the PA is doing something that you don't want them to do or you want them to do something a different way, it's really important in the beginning to give that feedback. You know, at Peppers we say feedback is a gift. Like we need that feedback, right? To be able to do our jobs and, you know, we want to make life easier for people, and that really helps. So even if it's something small that you're like, oh, driving me crazy, where they put, you know, the fruit in the fridge or , something like that.
Kara McKeage:
Like, nobody wants their, their client to feel that way. So there's a lot you can do, you know, to, to make it comfortable and it takes, you know, probably three months to really get into the groove with you know, a personal assistant. Sometimes you'll know right away that it's not gonna be a good fit and you don't have to wait three months, you know, it's good to fit in the relationship if you're like, I just know this isn't gonna work, but if somebody, you know, you're like, Ooh, not sure it's good to give it, you know, three months. So
Dr. Danielle:
That timeframe is so helpful. That's so valuable to hear from you because that is also a big question around hiring in general. You know, when you hire someone and things might be a little bumpy at first and the expectations are not clear or, or maybe, you know, like you feel like the expectations are clear, but that person's not performing the way that you want them to. Then yeah, like, how long do we like try to improve the relationship and improve the outcomes, right?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, and it takes both people, right? Because oftentimes we think we're communicating, but maybe we're not communicating effectively and like, you know, different things like you know, writing it down, you know, might be what somebody needs or an another big thing that sets people up for success is having like a weekly check-in. You know, where, you know, in the beginning it's probably gonna be a half hour depending on, you know, what type of task your PA is working on. But eventually it should be five or 10 minutes and it's time for the PA to ask questions to get unblocked, you know, for you to give feedback. Communication really is the most important piece of success with the relationship.
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. Yeah. And clear communication. Proactive communication.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah.
Dr. Danielle:
Which can feel hard and it can feel scary in some ways to do, but that's a growth edge for many women. Yes. really clearly expressed what it is that we want, how we need it, or want it to be done, and then also to give feedback on how it's being done.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. Yeah. And the, the more you do that, the quicker you get to the place where it's off your plate, , you know? So that's the benefit.
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah. Yeah. And, and to not let that, you know, know the inner voice that says like we're being mean or we're being bitchy stop us from having that clear communication so that we are able to get the best outcomes in the relationship.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. I love Brene Brown's where she says clear is kind you know, that's something that's helped me kind of overcome and obviously you have to give the positive feedback as well, cuz if you're only giving constructive feedback, you know, the, the PA is gonna get overwhelmed and feel like they're failing. So we wanna lift them up as well when we see them doing great things. And, and it's funny, we asked our employees like, what, what makes you feel appreciated, you know, from your client? And almost every single person said a simple thank you, like when they know it's genuine, like, can go a really long way. And helping to motivate somebody to keep, you know, doing a great job. So.
Dr. Danielle:
Awesome. Okay. Are there any other things that you would want someone to know who is overwhelmed, is starting to feel resentful toward their family or other people and wants to or needs to hire support, but feels just like they can't give themselves permission to do it.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah. you know, I think that's kind of the mission that I'm on is like busting that shame around asking for help and, you know everybody needs help, you know, and so if you can afford to outsource even small things, right? Like, I always recommend people start with the house cleaner because I think that has the biggest bang for your buck, you know, and even if it's just once a month, you know, to kind of help maintain it. But just really look at, you know, where do you wanna be spending your time and the things that are on your plate right now, do you really need to be the one doing it? And there's no shame in asking for help and asking for support. You know, smart, successful women outsource things, everybody does it, you know, . And so I think it's an important thing to, for us to normalize and get that support.
Dr. Danielle:
Yeah, absolutely. Okay. Share a little bit about how you work with your clients and what your business does.
Kara McKeage:
Sure. So we're based in Seattle and in Seattle the PAs are employees and then we have another arm of the business that is just placement nationwide. So that's, you know, doing all of the recruiting and helping get started. Those are the two hardest things of, of the process. And so, you know, we help with all of the experience we've had over the past 11 years of what makes a great PA and what doesn't and how to get started successfully and, and building that relationship.
Dr. Danielle:
Awesome. And if people want to learn more about what you do, where is the best place for them to go?
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, so our website is paseattle.com and that's a really great place to go for all of our contact info and social media connects too.
Dr. Danielle:
Great. Well, Kara, thank you so much for everything that you've shared today.
Kara McKeage:
Yeah, it was great chatting with you and hope people can get some, some outsourcing going and not feel the shame of it.
Dr. Danielle:
Hey, thanks so much for joining me for today's episode. If you love this podcast, then be sure to join our free community, the Health and Wellness Practitioners Group over on Facebook where you can continue the discussion and get to know other people in the community as well. We're a group of chiropractors, natural paths, acupuncturists, midwives, doulas, massage, mental health therapist, counselors, nutritionist, and a list goes on. So come join us, get to know other people, build some personal and professional relationships. You can find the group by heading to Dr. Daniel angela.com/community and request to join the group. I will see you inside from there.