Why Women Can’t Drink Like Men

In this episode of Recovery Rocks with Kelly, host Kelly explores the biological realities of how alcohol affects women differently than men. Breaking down the science behind body water concentration, liver damage, heart risks, and breast cancer, Kelly shares her personal story of moving from a "weekend drinker" mom to surviving liver failure. She challenges the pervasive "mommy wine culture" and encourages listeners to ask honest questions about their relationship with alcohol, offering support and empowerment for women evaluating their health, mind, and future.

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Creators and Guests

Host

Kelly Schuster

What is Recovery Rocks?

Recovery Rocks with Kelly is a podcast about motherhood, family, and navigating everyday life in sobriety. Kelly shares the real ups and downs of being a mom in recovery—from raising kids and managing relationships to taking care of yourself while taking care of everyone else. With honest stories, real-life experiences, and occasional guests, it’s about motherhood, recovery, healing, and building a recovery that rocks.

I really want women to feel comfortable asking

questions about their relationship with alcohol.

It's very important.

You don't have to compare yourself with the

guy sitting next to you or compare yourself

to your girlfriends.

You don't have to prove you can hold

your own liquor.

Your body doesn't care about any of that.

Here's what I want you to remember.

If there's one thing you can take away

from this today's episode, let it be this.

Strength isn't proving how much alcohol you can

handle.

Strength is knowing yourself well enough to make

choices that protect the life you are building.

So in today's tip, we're going to be

talking about why can't women drink like men.

Honestly, I wish I would have understood this

much earlier in my drinking.

Women and men don't experience alcohol exactly the

same way.

And no, this isn't me saying women aren't

as strong as men.

Please, we gave birth, raised families, run households,

build careers, keep track of everybody's appointments, and

somehow we're still expected to know where everybody

left their shoes.

Women are incredibly strong, but when it comes

to alcohol, our biology matters.

For a long time, I didn't really think

about what alcohol was doing inside my body.

I talked about this in my last podcast,

how bad alcohol damaged my body when I

had liver failure.

Why women can't drink like men?

Well, women's bodies process alcohol differently.

Generally, women tend to have less body water

than men of the same weight.

Why does this matter?

Because alcohol distributes through the water in our

bodies.

That means after the same amount of alcohol,

a woman can end up with a higher

concentration of alcohol in her body than a

man of the same weight.

So when you're sitting there thinking, why is

this affecting me so much?

The truth is actually, like I said, biology

is behind it.

And what really got my attention is women

can experience alcohol-related health problems, like I

mentioned before, at lower levels of drinking than

men.

When I experienced my liver failure, like I

said, it was a process.

It did not just come on fast.

It was something that took on slowly.

I was kind of more like that first

just a weekend drinker.

I was that type of mom that I

couldn't wait till the weekend.

I would look forward to Fridays.

And I remember looking forward to those Fridays

after work.

Are you that mom that looks forward to

Fridays?

And then do you feel like you had

a difficult week?

You deserve a few drinks.

However, alcohol stopped being something I occasionally enjoyed

and became something I depended on to change

how I felt.

That is why, my friend, you can start

asking yourself some questions.

Can I stop after two drinks?

Can I just not drink on the weekends?

Does my alcohol affect the people around me?

Usually the questions we are afraid to ask

ourselves are the ones that lead us to

a better way of living.

So not only does alcohol affect our liver

and liver diseases, it also affects our heart,

heart problems.

For many years during my drinking career, I

always thought, oh, having a glass of wine

is good for your heart.

You know, you probably have heard that saying.

So red wine was always like, oh, well,

I'm drinking good for my heart.

So the conversation around alcohol and heart condition

is much more complicated than that.

Alcohol can raise blood pressure, and heavy drinking

can contribute to cardiovascular problems.

So I wouldn't encourage anyone to start drinking

because they believe alcohol is something they need

for their heart.

There are much safer ways to support cardiovascular

health.

And then there's motherhood.

Ladies, we need to talk about this part

too.

Our culture has made alcohol and motherhood almost

a joke.

Mommy needs wine, wine glasses that say things

like mommy's little helper, memmies that's surviving bedtime

with wine, drinking because the kids were crazy

all day.

I understand why these jokes connect with moms,

but motherhood can be exhausting.

But I think we also need to be

able to ask, when did alcohol become one

of those ways mom can expect to cope

with motherhood?

Because maybe a mom really needs, isn't just

another glass of wine, maybe she needs support.

Maybe she needs a rest.

Maybe she needs somebody else to make dinner

tonight.

Maybe she needs 20 minutes where nobody says

mom, mom, mom.

Maybe she needs permission to say, I am

just overwhelmed.

There's nothing funny about a woman silently struggling

why everyone around her thinks she's fine.

And not only the liver and heart problem

stuff, it is an increase breast cancer with

women with alcohol.

This one I think deserves a serious moment.

Alcohol consumption increased the risk of breast cancer

and the risk it can increase relatively low

levels of alcohol of consumption.

Again, that is low levels of alcohol consumption.

That doesn't mean every woman who drinks is

going to develop breast cancer.

Risk doesn't work that way.

But it does mean alcohol is modifiably breast

cancer risk factor.

And women deserve to know that when they're

making decisions about drinking.

I certainly think it's information worth talking about.

I don't want to scare you or scare

anyone about talking about this.

I'm sharing my experience and I say it

because women deserve to know.

Pay attention to you and your body.

Your relationship with alcohol.

What are your reasons for a drink?

How alcohol makes you feel physically and emotionally.

You deserve to know the truth about what

you're putting in your body.

Because Recovery Rocks with Kelly isn't about me

telling you how to live your life.

It's one woman saying to another, hear what

happened to me.

Here's what I'm learning.

And maybe something in my story will help

you understand yours.

I really want women to feel comfortable asking

questions about their relationship with alcohol.

It's very important.

You don't have to compare yourself with the

guy sitting next to you or compare yourself

to your girlfriends.

You don't have to prove you can hold

your own liquor.

Your body doesn't care about any of that.

Here's what I want you to remember.

If there's one thing you can take away

from this today's episode, let it be this.

Strength is improving how much alcohol you can

handle.

Strength is knowing yourself well enough to make

choices that protect the life you are building.

And if you're ready in recovery, be proud

of what you're doing for yourself.

Your body is worth taking care of.

Your mind is worth protecting.

Your future is worth showing up for.

And you are worth it.

I'm Kelly and this is Recovery Rocks with

Kelly.

Real women, real conversations, real recovery.

And next time we're going to go deeper.

We're asking a question that changed the way

I look at my own drinking.

In the past, we are asking alcohol, what

was I asking alcohol to do for me?

Oh, friend, that's going to be a conversation.

Until then, take care of yourself.

Give yourself some grace and keep on rocking

your recovery.

I'll talk to you next time.