Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques

What stops you from speaking up when it matters most?

This week on Think Fast Talk Smart, we’re featuring a special episode from TED Business. Healthcare leader Sarah Crawford-Bohl offers a practical, compassionate framework to have difficult conversations with clarity and heart — and shows how it can lead to stronger teams and real impact.

TED Business is a podcast from TED that offers you a new idea and perspective for any business conundrum — whether you want to learn how to land that promotion, set smart goals, undo injustice at work, or unlock the next big innovation. Every Monday, host Modupe Akinola of Columbia Business School presents the most powerful and surprising ideas that illuminate the business world. After the talk, you'll get a mini-lesson from Modupe on how to apply the ideas in your own life — because business evolves every day, and our ideas about it should, too. Listen wherever you get your podcasts or here.

Episode Reference Links:
Connect:

Chapters:

  • (00:00) - Introduction
  • (02:46) - If Not You, Then Who?
  • (04:01) - The Cost of Silence
  • (05:25) - Avoiding Conflict at Work
  • (06:20) - Why Speaking Up Matters
  • (07:30) - Building Courage Through Practice
  • (08:40) - A Moral Compass for Conversations
  • (12:01) - Handling Tough Feedback
  • (17:06) - QORC Apology Framework
  • (18:56) - Conclusion

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Creators and Guests

Host
Matt Abrahams
Lecturer Stanford University Graduate School of Business | Think Fast Talk Smart podcast host

What is Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques?

One of the most essential ingredients to success in business and life is effective communication.

Join Matt Abrahams, best-selling author and Strategic Communication lecturer at Stanford Graduate School of Business, as he interviews experts to provide actionable insights that help you communicate with clarity, confidence, and impact. From handling impromptu questions to crafting compelling messages, Matt explores practical strategies for real-world communication challenges.

Whether you’re navigating a high-stakes presentation, perfecting your email tone, or speaking off the cuff, Think Fast, Talk Smart equips you with the tools, techniques, and best practices to express yourself effectively in any situation. Enhance your communication skills to elevate your career and build stronger professional relationships.

Tune in every Tuesday for new episodes. Subscribe now to unlock your potential as a thoughtful, impactful communicator. Learn more and sign up for our eNewsletter at fastersmarter.io.

Matt Abrahams: Speaking your mind can
be incredibly scary, especially at work.

You might question yourself, worrying
if you came off as demanding,

rude, or just wrong in front of the
people whose opinions matter most.

I'm Matt Abrahams and I teach
Strategic Communication at Stanford

Graduate School of Business.

Welcome to this very special episode
of Think Fast Talk Smart, the podcast.

This week I wanna share ideas for how
to communicate our thoughts in important

situations by sharing a special episode
from a podcast I love called TED Business.

It features practical tips
and insights from healthcare

leader Sarah Crawford-Bohl.

She'll offer a framework that will
allow you to take in feedback with a

little more ease, turn conflict into an
opportunity for connection, and choose

moments to speak up with more certainty.

I hope you enjoy this
episode as much as I did.

Modupe Akinola: I've brought up
my late friend and mentor Kathy

Phillips before on this podcast.

She had a profound impact on my
life and the lessons I've learned

from her remain with me to this day.

One of the things she often
talked about was the importance of

sticking your neck out and engaging
in difficult conversations even

when you don't really want to.

She had a mantra for this that I'll
always remember, if not you, then who?

If not now, then when?

I am Modupe Akinola.

This is TED Business, a podcast from TED.

Our speaker today is healthcare
leader Sarah Crawford-Bohl.

Her North Star is her late mom,
an intensive care nurse who was no

stranger to difficult conversations.

Today, Sarah will share some of the
wisdom she learned from her mother and

give concrete advice on how to speak up.

Then after the talk, I'll reflect on some
more sound advice from my colleagues.

But first, a quick break.

Sarah crawford-Bohl now takes the stage.

Sarah Crawford-Bohl: Silence.

It can be a needed moment of peace
and contemplation, but what happens

when silence becomes a barrier?

A barrier that muffles the voice
of truth, of advocacy, of change.

Speak up.

Advocate for yourself.

Stand up for what you believe in.

That's what they say, right?

Well, even though I know they're
right, it's easier said than done.

I'm sure we can all think of a time
when we faced a crossroads, perhaps

the precipice of an uncomfortable
conversation, when speaking up felt

like the right, if not even essential
path, but silence seemed safer.

I can vividly see and feel
myself being in those moments.

Times when I stood red faced, embarrassed,
or offended, or frustrated, or angry with

a sinking feeling in my stomach, unable
to find my voice and unsure if I had

the courage, confidence, or will to face
the difficult conversation before me.

Sound familiar?

We're not alone.

Research from VitalSmarts, a global
leader in organizational performance

and leadership tells us people
would rather quit their jobs than

address a challenging situation.

In this post pandemic time with
baby boomers retiring and a wave of

quiet resignation upon us, the world
seems to be working short staffed.

Now, I'm a nurse and I've worked
in healthcare leadership for a long

time, and I'm here to tell you, in
this profession we can't risk losing

anyone, especially not for the reason
of avoiding a challenging conversation.

In a world where we are experiencing
increasingly rapid cycles of change,

we can expect difficult conversations,
particularly in the workplace to

happen more often than ever before.

Moments such as sharing
feedback, identifying mistakes,

or calling out disrespect.

They're not always easy, but
often critical to the performance

of both individuals and a team.

In healthcare where stakes are high,
our willingness to raise concerns

can be vital to the quality of care
we provide, but also to the safety

of patients and the care team.

In fact, research also tells us that
when we do speak up, we experience

more job satisfaction, increased
team morale, and in my world,

support better patient outcomes.

I've experienced this for myself.

Now I don't have all the answers
and I don't always get it right.

In fact, I, I make a mess of it sometimes.

But often I've found it's a bit
like cardio or weightlifting.

Well, we feel a bit vulnerable
at the time, with practice, we

start to experience the benefits.

It gets easier and we get better at it.

We need to find a path to help us get
past that initial fight, flight, or freeze

response to get us to the table and make
leaning into uncomfortable conversations

the desired action for our own benefit,
as well as to benefit those around us.

Now, I was fortunate I had some amazing
role modeling by parents who encouraged

me to use my voice, specifically when
I knew I should but didn't want to.

My mom, an intensive care nurse
for many years, had a special

ability to address tough topics.

Traumas, embarrassing bodily functions,
or sharing critical feedback.

She always created airtime
for normally avoided matters.

With a fierce moral compass that was
sometimes incredibly frustrating,

she advocated for what was right,
showing me the importance of

standing up for oneself and others,
even when uncomfortable to do so.

My mom, she died a long time ago now,
and I still miss her desperately.

Something I think I miss the most
though is her always knowing the

right thing to do and the way she
guided me with that moral compass.

And despite having a couple of degrees
under my belt, lessons learned from

that moral compass, they guide me
more than any of my formal learning.

She showed me that as leaders, and I mean
all leaders, both formal and informal,

we play a pivotal role in leaning into
courageous conversations and creating

the safe place for others to do the same.

It's probably our strong commitment
in this area that inspired me to go

into healthcare leadership, a path
that often puts me in an area of high

conflict and tricky conversations.

But in doing so, exposes me to innovation,
change making, and meaningful work.

It's an incredible career that I'm
honored to be a part of, and I owe it

to my mom and myself to do it well.

So when I find myself needing courage
and confidence, making that moment

to step into the abyss of a difficult
conversation, I try to remember my

mom's moral compass and the principles
she worked so hard to nurture in me.

I imagine holding a compass in
my hand, the cool metal upon my

skin, taking a breath, a moment
to pause and ground myself.

I see the directions of north,
south, east, and west as symbols,

reminders of her core teachings.

North, I think about the North
Star, a guide towards the

good and right thing to do.

In tricky situations I
remember my mom's voice.

Be the best version of yourself.

Take the high road.

Say what needs to be said.

South, the S in south
reminds me of support.

When people support me
I feel seen, cared for.

When it comes to supporting
others, I try to do the same.

Leaning into tricky conversations
with kindness and an intention

of helping people grow.

And east, the E stands for empathy.

Empathy sets the tone for a conversation.

As a leader, I want people
to feel safe coming to me.

I try to understand their
feelings and create a safe

place for them to be themselves.

And West, the W stands for wonder,
getting curious about what might

be going on for the other person.

I ask questions and listen, so I
understand before trying to be understood.

When I focus on the principles of
the compass, I'm able to move from

reactive to proactive, getting
into a mindset where I can be true

to my values and share my voice.

I recall a situation not long ago where
I was able to put the compass to use.

I was in a change management and
communications role for a big project,

and while the work was complex
and bumpy, I was proud of myself.

I was writing good stuff, inspiring
hearts and minds, or so I thought.

One day a physician came into
the office where I was meeting

with my boss, my boss's boss,
and a number of other leaders.

He had one of my newsletters printed
out and was waving it in the air.

Who is the cheerleader
sending out this stuff?

As an optimist, sometimes to a fault,

I knew right away that cheerleader was me.

While I was embarrassed, I had a split
second to decide, stay silent or speak up.

The compass came in handy
in that moment, North Star.

What was the good and right thing to do?

Well, I needed to own my
work, take the feedback.

So I said that would be me.

He lowered his arm and said,
well, this is too positive,

not an accurate representation
of what we're going through.

While still defensive I
remembered support and empathy.

I wanted to create a safe place
where he could feel seen and heard.

So I suggested we sit down together so
I could better understand his concerns.

Next step, wonder.

We went to his office and I
asked curious questions and over

some tea he told me his story.

He got out a red pen and circled
the nine times I'd mentioned

something positive in that article.

I acknowledged there's too
many, understandably devaluing.

I then asked if we could look for
times I'd mentioned challenges.

To his surprise, and frankly my
own, 18 times, 18 I'd mentioned

things that needed to be fixed.

I was able to let him know I was
embarrassed by being called out in

front of my superiors and he apologized.

You know, that time spent together,
it was valuable for me and I think we

both took something meaningful away.

So I always remember the moral compass.

North, North Star south, support,
east, empathy, and west, wonder.

I know when I'm true to my compass
I'm courageous, confident, the

person I wanna be, and I think the
daughter my parents would be proud of.

And with my husband and our two daughters,
I get the chance to pay it forward.

So I hope you'll join me in leaning
into tricky conversations, not only

finding our voices, but understanding the
imperative to use them, stand up against

the wrong, champion the right, and be
the voice for those who cannot speak for

themselves, no matter how shaky or unsure.

We can be a powerful instrument of
change and advocacy, leaving all

people involved stronger as a result.

Thank you.

Modupe Akinola: That was Sarah
Crawford-Bohl speaking at TEDx RRU.

I love Sarah's image of the compass and
the acronym she's created from it to

ground herself in a delicate conversation.

One of the hardest times to speak
up is when we've messed up and we

are the ones who need to swallow
our pride, take accountability

for our actions, and apologize.

And my colleague, Adam Galinsky, has
an acronym for this too, QORC, or

as he likes to call it, QORC crisis.

I'll break it down for you.

Q is for quick.

Make sure you can apologize as
soon as you can, so there's no

time for conflict to fester.

O is for open.

Be candid and open in your apology.

R is for responsibility, as in
take responsibility and focus

on the other person and how
it might have affected them.

And finally, C is for commit.

Commit to change.

Let them know what you might do
differently next time or in the future.

It's okay if you need a little pep
talk or a small map to help guide

you through a difficult interaction.

And if you can try to remember that the
beauty of difficult conversations is that

they can actually be transformational.

That's it for today.

Ted Business is part of
the TED Audio Collective.

This episode was produced by Hannah
Kingsley-Ma, edited by Alejandra Salazar,

and fact checked by Julia Dickerson.

Special thanks to Maria Ladias,
Farrah de Grunge, Daniella Balarezo,

Tansica S, and Roxanne Hai Lash.

I'm Modupe Akinola.

Thanks for listening.

Matt Abrahams: That was an episode of
TED Business with hosts Modupe Akinola.

Hear more business advice from weekly
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