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Conversations about things that interest me… until they don’t. Because new = shiny ✨
Featuring cool people and unbridled banter.
Dive in. Jump out. Rinse. Repeat.
Erica Alshuler (00:01)
kick this off by saying hi. Welcome to the first episode of shiny shenanigans, which is a working title, which means it will remain that way because now it's stuck. And it said SS SS Courtney, my friend dubbed shiny shit show for outtakes. This will be shiny shenanigans both work. This ends up being more of a shit show. And then yeah, who knows what this is? Who knows? So the origin of this I'm Erica Han Alshuler, who you know, from this podcast.
if you've ever heard it before. Over here is Celeste Brown. Welcome, Celeste. Thanks for having me, Erica. I love this. We don't know what we're doing. What we're doing. And so Celeste is here because, well, we had so much the Bluey pod that I'm sure you've listened to. And being the kind real friend that she is shared, A, how much fun it was, B, that she'd love to do more of it, but C, no pressure, which I appreciated, no pressure. But...
Also as fun and good to our own horn, the other podcast episodes are, there was maybe room for more of what seemed like the fun part in them, which is just like tangents and laughing and being goofy not being serious about a very specific topic. so shiny shenanigans was born.
It was. I don't know how to spell shenanigans, I'm going to be honest. Well, we're going to put you on the spot right now. Try. That's the only problem with that title. Try. And don't be funny and misspell it on purpose. you want me to spell shenanigans? Shenanigans. What's the origin? Is that Irish? Shenanigans. S -H -E -N -N -I -G -A -N -S. Shenanigans? You said shenanigans. I don't know, dude. Shenanigans. You talk about shenanigans? Girl.
You guys talking about shenanigans? I do not know what that's from.
so I usually watch super troopers like the first like, how many movie and Rook? What's up, Rook? my gosh.
at least a year. I swear I'm not exaggerating for at least a year. When we would come home to our Santa Monica apartment right after college, every night from going out and imbibing, we would put on Super Troopers when we came home. We would watch the first 20 minutes and promptly pass out and go to sleep. Because do you know at what minute mark the title Super Trooper comes up? Do you really think I would know? No, I don't either.
It's one minute, 12 seconds. No, it's a full 20 minutes in. You're watching that whole car chase thing, you know, like you boys like Mexico. Yeah. So when the super troopers name pops up, that's when you turn off. Well, pretty much. Yeah. Sometimes we go through it later, but yeah, it's such an incredible opening and such a amazing movie, but we are always tired. We were tired. Broken Lizard, who makes that like a comedy group. Okay. I made also.
are behind the scenes of a lot of big movies. I'm not going to get this right, but they're writers and they produce like blockbuster movies. And my sister was working at the writer's store, a screenwriting place in LA. Anyways, they had an event and I got to hear like Farva and Thorny and met them and like chatted about Super Troopers 2. It was pretty awesome.
See, that would be good content to hear about your days of running into celebrities. Well, we both live in LA. This is an LA -based podcast. not know each other until we were mom friends here in El Segundo. We share our LA youth experiences. Well, and we, I grew up in Southern California and you were in Northern California. Yeah. So my celebrities were tech celebrities.
My boyfriend at the time in high school, his dad was on the board of Apple and he is a wonderful human, which I will go into in much more depth at some point. Bill Campbell, get his book coach. Bill Gates was it? But Bill Gates would come over all the time. I had no idea who he was. Are you serious? And then they had a which is funny, tangent from the movie Can't Hardly Wait.
And his, their dog's name is Amanda. I've seen the movie about a million times. Yes. So their dog, Amanda would bark all the time. And his mom, so funny, would be like, Amanda hates jobs. Every time Steve would come over, Amanda would bark at her. Rest in peace to both Steve and Bill.
But, so you got those sweet tech stories. That's cool. So those were the, I didn't appreciate it at the time. I mean, it was insane and not like, I should have taken advantage of my situation, but also like everyone who went to my high school and lived up there all kind of did tech and various degrees of success or luck or wherever. And then it's so funny because I avoided that after college and moved to Southern California, tried to do PR and then found myself in tech and was like, here I am. I'm in so Caltech now, but I guess it was in my, in my blood.
My dad is an engineer and wanted one of my sister or I to become an engineer, but I, at least I got into tech, graphic design and marketing. So we're both adjacent. Okay. Tech adjacent. I worked with engineers that actually I credit my dad with my ability to, you know, be able to communicate across different spectrums in the workplace. in my like leadership role, I was a communicator between all the different departments.
got to speak your friend's language. But yeah, those are my tech celebrities. What were your L .A. celebrities? So what is anyone from P .V. that's like big now? besides me and this podcast. So famous, so famous. I was an extra in Terminator
It is the back of my hair, my head and my hair color is different now. So look, you have to look at it at the widescreen version. Or you get trim. So I learned that as I was trying to show it to someone one day. I'm like, watch this. Here it is.
Celeste walking in the mall scene when Arnold Schwarzenegger, Terminator 2, is carrying the box of roses. But really it's a gun, guys. Spoiler alert! Spoiler alert! He's a Terminator. He's a Terminator. And he's a good Terminator in this one. And you see the back of my head, and it was the best day of my life. I mean, this real talk here. Like there is something so magical about the movies, and I...
I always assumed everyone felt that way, but I don't know that everyone does feel that way. I know there's like a magic to, how's that get made? There's obviously celebrity appeal and allure, is something I can never shake awe and wonder and childlike delight when in my job, I got to go have meetings on the studio lots and I would like freak out, like freak out. And I talked to people who worked every day and I go.
does this ever get old? I am with you. And I, growing up in SoCal, so close to LA, I mean, we went to Universal Studios, I was like five, and we're going on a little tour and Tom Hanks is there. Shut up. There's a picture of me, a young - Watching him film? Like, hey, and he rode his bike by us and he waved to us, he was darling.
And that was my first celebrity that I saw. Amazing. people in LA are like, whatever. I don't care celebrity settings, but dude, it's exciting. Well, and it's funny though, because - It's your part of like something global. Everyone knows Tom Hanks and you're there with him and it's fun. I don't know. It's interesting. And you kind of feel like you know them. That's the other weird part, right?
I heard an actor or maybe it was Smartless. I listen to that all the a side note, number one podcast in America will come up right on their heels. I heard someone say at some point, the hardest part about being an actor or one of the hard parts.
is that you don't get a chance to make a first impression. It was an interview, I think. And you said, someone already has an impression of you before they even knew you. And maybe it was that you were that dick villain in a movie, but that's not you. But it doesn't matter. You can't shake that first impression. And so I feel like I know people. Thankfully, the ones that I love, you can kind of learn over time, are they like that? Or are they not like, Ryan Reynolds, I don't actually love you. I am married, happily married, but.
No, I will not go home with you, Ryan Reynolds. Stop asking. I know that we'd be friends like and I know you're Van Wilder. We're sounding so crazy. We really are, but that's OK. I think we would be really good friends, Ryan. But no, here's a good celebrity sighting. I was working in the wine and spirit alcohol industry for a at like on Sunset
I don't even remember Skybar. I think that was what it was. And I found myself a young Celeste full of life and energy pizzazz sitting at a table with Tracy Morgan and Bob Saget and whoever else is there. I know you told me this but I'm jaw dropped right now. I don't know that I knew the story. Of course I sit right next to everybody. sit directly in the middle of this like long table. I such confidence. I don't know what it was.
Thank God. I would, I would, but they probably like usher me out because I'm old, old bag. But I was sitting next to Bob Saget's manager or something. And I said to Bob Saget's manager, I'm like, I love Bob Saget and Half Baked when he says, they're talking about, I do. I used to say, yeah. Yeah. And Bob's. Yeah. I see him.
the Bob Saget's manager is like, don't bring it up to him. He doesn't want to talk about it. Dark days of his career, apparently. And so I sat there silenced because I felt like my energy had been dropped. I'm like, I thought Bob Saget would appreciate it. Well, and you just wanted to be, now you felt like you had boundaries you had to have. But I think that was probably what people brought up to him a lot. Which is probably, yeah, not how he defines his career.
But anyways, you remember that like that was such a big deal when he came out with that because anyone who had seen his standup knew that he was raunchy and ever but he had this fame as I almost yeah, really matters but full house. Yeah. Tanner. Yeah, I know. So anyways, it seems like he shouldn't be as also rest in peace. also rest in peace. Dude, don't pay attention to as we talk about this now like.
celebrities, whatever, I don't pay attention anymore. I think it's a lot of reasons, busy mom, whatever, but also the world got kind of dark and I know this is not a healthy response, but I just like don't read or watch any sort of news source that much. And so I don't know things anymore. And last night
someone something about Jason Momoa was on their list of like favorite celebrities or male that they would marry. There are lists or whatever. And I said, my friend used to rock climb teach him. She said he was the sweetest guy and his wife. And they're like, who? His wife now? I was like, yeah, yeah, you know, Lisa. And they're like, if you say Lisa Bonet, they've been divorced for like two years.
I was about to say El Bonet. I was trying to help you out. She had been divorced for like two years. I thought they were a power couple in LA. See, I don't pay attention to this. No, see, I don't know. I had a Dali Wong show. It was all about divorce. I had no idea. And now she's dating Bill Hader, which is awesome, but I had no idea. See, I know like comedians. So the people I have said rest in peace, it's like a comedian. I don't know like normal actors deaths. Yeah. I mean.
Anyway, who else has died? That's a really fun Skybar sitting place with Tracy Morgan. Did you bond with him? I don't remember. I was very drunk. But anyway, so I grew up in Southern California in Palos Verdes area. And so now we've been in El Segundo. we see your man.
You see him all the time at cheer practice. He lives in Manhattan. Vince Vaughn. Yeah. Probably one of the best celebrities that you'd actually want to hang out with. It's going to happen. I have this feeling. Sorry, Vince, if you hear this. So you're going to hang out with everyone seems to love Vince Vaughn. Anyone I tell this story to like that Vince Vaughn's son was playing on my daughter, Clara was doing cheer like a pop Warner cheer cheering for Vince Vaughn's son who was on the football team. And
Vaughn would show up to every practice. He hangs out on the side of the track. I would dress cute, I guess. We wanted to be... I would wear something I wouldn't wear to school. See, I take a different approach. But it was a low key, so it didn't... I would take the like, I'm trying so hard to not try that it has to be so obvious that I'm not trying. And I have to just stumble into him and be like, yeah. you're from that... yeah, hey.
I didn't notice you there. But isn't that funny? No, and he's getting more work, so that's good. Well, and I think he's another example of someone who somewhat projects a similar personality to his real maybe he's not that sarcastic or dry, but you get the sense that he's obviously a comedian, he's funny, and he's easygoing and somewhat sarcastic. And side
really enjoy like having real conversations with kids, especially like your oldest Clara, when they're old enough to have conversations You can tell the look in their eye is, this mom is just like talking to us. How weird, but I love
my son is in drama.
He just had his play this weekend. He's nine years old. It was musical. The musical was great.
And so I was talking to some of his like older friends at theater and can't remember the context, but I said, you know, it's a harder to.
that's like you, right? It's easier to hide behind a big character, to be the loud, goofy one. You're really wearing a mask and you can just lean into it. But when you're kind of nuancing your own, I'm not an actress, but when I was in like middle school theater, and that was always harder, that nuance, because it's almost like you're putting yourself out there and you're more vulnerable. But if you're being some absurd big caricature, that's easier. And anyways, I felt like I really bonded with these kids in this moment, but I think giving him credit.
someone like Vince Vaughn credit playing roles that are close to themselves. It's funny that you say like, because I also talked to Erica's son Wyatt who does the plays. I try to talk to him like, well, what audition song are you using? That's the wrong one. Here's what you need. Let's Google. Anyway, but like you're saying, I think these kids like hearing from me some ideas. Meanwhile, these kids are like, shut up old lady. Stop talking to me.
They're like, God, make this stop. my God, someone save me. But in our eyes, we're like, I really helped that kid today. I really felt that way. Yeah. I was like, gosh, just this good moment. They must think Wyatt's so lucky to have a cool mom. See, so that's, we bond over that. Like we're like, we're like cool moms. Like, no, you can talk to me. I'm a kind of regular mom. And I do that to Wyatt totally. I told Kirk, I'm like, I think Wyatt and I bonded and.
He likes hearing my ideas. Meanwhile, he's like, my God. I'm sure he does. I'm sure he does. He's just very distractible and very ADHD. he likes cool older girls, not older women. He wants to hang out with like fifth and sixth graders. No one wants to hang out with older women. No one. Name one category of people that wants to hang out with old women besides old women. Allie Wong said in her show, she said, I thought I would be this.
you know, stretched out woman with baggage that no one would want. And she's like, you know who wants a financially independent older woman who doesn't want kids? Hot young dudes. So there's someone who wants to hang out with us, but they only if we have sex with them. They want to be with her because of money, dude. I'm just, I was answering your question of what category wants to be with older women. As an aging woman, I can wear my backwards hat and you know, platform shoes, makeup, put some rouge on.
Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. I'm still an old lady. And old ladies bond with old ladies and otherwise. What's funny is that by the time our kids are old enough to know that like,
were little, we weren't actually that old, right? We're like 40s, late Like looking back at my parents, they go, my gosh, you were not that old when I was a little kid, but you can't register that as a little kid. And by the time they register eight, you really are gonna be so old. I hate where this is going. I'm gonna throw up in my mouth. My mom had her 40th surprise birthday party, I remember. I was like in seventh grade or something. And looking back, I just remember thinking, they're so,
old, ill, I'm leaving the house. 40 is like a prime for us. Guys. Let me throw over it. Change the subject. I know, well, speaking of that, I am torn of changing the subject. I'm torn in each moment that we're talking here to like, do I go back to the things I wanted to say more that we were talking about earlier? Or do we just naturally keep moving on? I don't know. I want to hear from the audience at some point after we post this very strange podcast to see like,
Just move on girls, move on, or go back and tell more celebrity stories, for example. And I want to say at least from me, so Erica, your show's great, your podcast, and you have people on your podcast that are experts in something or have experience in a field, whatever, that they can share their experience. Just so the viewers know, I don't have any expertise that I'm bringing to this.
and you're wondering why is Celeste on the show? I said I don't have an expertise show. No, no, but I'm just saying there's no big reason why I'm here other than I'm like, hey, Erica, I'm here if you need me, if you want me. I like to talk. You're entertaining. You like to talk. And so don't think that I have any words of wisdom for anybody. Or. You also can do this at 9 a on a Tuesday. That's a big factor. Thanks, Erica.
That's why I get to - Jesus Christ. Hey, she fits into this schedule. That's it. No, but we both have three kids and we both have very similar lives to any mom out there who's trying to get her done. Get her done. And we're in the second day of summer vacation over here in El Segundo.
let's not talk about being old anymore. Yes. Two thoughts that I had earlier about both how you engage with celebrities and how I had two thoughts. One, for example, I think that's part of the reason celebrities hang out.
obviously because they can relate and there's a lot of reasons, but they're not going to treat each other differently. Because even though you and I try to be like, we'd be so chill, you can't turn that off in some way, right? They see the sparkle in our eyes. Yeah, and you can't turn off the magic and you just try to be relaxed and be yourself. And I'm sure there's so many people here in LA who hang out with and have close friends who are celebrities all the time, and it doesn't feel weird. But I've seen examples and I swear there's always going to be this.
power dynamic that isn't quite right, right? Like, so that's a theory. I can't prove it, but that reminds me of my best celebrity story, which is we had gone out on sunset. Why we kept doing that? In the early 2000s, that's where you went. And the celebrities did too. We went to Red Rocks, which was like
the chill place we always went after. we knew that the friend that we were with was friends with John Mears manager and he was there and he's like, John's going to come here in a little bit. So we kind of all knew we were on edge, but you're going to act chill. Like John was just on, he was on fire at that time. It was the prime era and like reflecting back, I realized that I hadn't thought about it, but if I had really spent time thinking about what one celebrity,
what I want to meet the most, not just because they're famous, but because I actually really care about their art and whatever. I mean, I was deep in college, my body is a wonderland, Napster acoustic version before Rupert Brands overproduced came out. Limewire. Yes, exactly. So I was deep, deep into this. He spoke to my soul in a way that others hadn't in a beautiful, loving way. And so he's coming to the bar, we're all ready for And we're standing kind of around in a circle talking with our drinks.
And he comes in and we all notice him, but I'm telling a story to a group of people and he kind of cuts into our circle and faces me and starts talking to me, which should have been a dream, but - ⁓ my God. I, so honored. Thank you, John. But also I was like, I get that maybe you're hitting on me or you're a celebrity, but you don't interrupt a story. And you stepped in front of the circle. So I opened up the circle and made room for him to join our conversation. What? So you got to treat him normal.
I'm saying. And he was not interested in that, so he went away. But we did find each other later. He just walked up solo mission to you? Yeah. Okay, wait, continual. I don't know why. I mean, I'm tall. I was young at the time. She's very beautiful. And a good vapor. Well, that's very true. But - I was much
I remember so well, so this must've been like early two thousands. I was wearing a DKNY shirt, but it was, a suiting material, but it was cut like a baseball tee at the bottom, you know, like angled and had frayed edges on the sleeves.
and it had a patch. It was meant to look like a fitted sexy gas station attendant. It had a patch that's Indy Kynwine instead of Hal or whatever the guy's name would have been. frayed edges. Yes. It was just cut. That's so sexy. And then I had it unbuttoned down a little. It was fitted. And then a skirt, which is so funny because I think these even are coming back, but a denim, almost an ash -lead wash, but not cheesy 80s, but a...
not natural looking denim like a denim. That was a pleated like tennis skirt shape. yeah. With that shirt. So I think I had one of those too. You know you did. Wow. So you went like super preppy that night. Like I mean it was like cool preppy. It was like gas station cool. Do you remember what shoes you had? God, I don't. How do you remember what you're wearing? Because that moment I was like that moment happened. John Mayer just hit on me. So like my turn me or two moment, which is like one of the best things I've ever done.
I don't know, but. You can see the movie. No, but that you remember because it was like this. It's a big deal. He walked up to you. And then we did talk later. We found each other in the corner and on TV came his late night appearance. So you came up to him the second time. No, he found me again later. He came to you twice? We found each other in the my. It wasn't like a courtship.
Maybe I like sidled up next to him. You probably gave him like I moved in his direction and we watched on the TV in the corner. His self having just recorded this, we watched him on the late night show and we talked about his breakup with my nephew. It was showing on the TV in the bar. It was fun. That's I'm sure they did that on purpose. I know, but that's so awkward. And then he invited me back to his hotel room, which was slow down.
the hotel two doors down from my sister's apartment at the time where I was staying, but I was like, you know. Did he invite you and your friends? Did he try to play it cool? Like, hey, you and your friends come by or was he like, you? No, he invited me, but I was not the only person invited. It was just not like all of us. It was like me plus several other women he had probably met that evening. So I don't not calling you a sex addict. I don't know if he like came out about that or if he's into things like that. But like, do you remember what he said? Like, hey, do you want to come back to my place for a drink? The park hotel.
And I don't remember the context of it. And you said, no, no, sorry, bro. See, Dennis, you passed the test. John Mayer. I mean, Mary won a layer. Mary won a layer for the rest of us. Can you imagine? Give me a second, but well done. But for the rest of us, I have never had a celebrity approach me like that. But that's amazing. That has to feel. I would hold on to that forever. I obviously have.
On the ugliest of ugly days. Let's go back to this so I can tell my story about John Mayer hitting on me. Yeah, like twice. And the invite back to the hotel. And you were like, no, I'm taken. it's way better to be like, I got the chance and I turned it down than to be like, I bombed John Mayer in a room with a bunch of other women and never. I wish you had gone just to see. I just had a thought. What I feel like.
the manager asked me back. Do you know what I mean? That seems more like it. So it's taken away from my story, but if I think about it, I feel like it was a he's gathering people. I didn't want to call you a liar. No, I just had a vision. I don't know if it said it makes sense in my head or it actually happened. Obviously I was drinking. But yeah, that seems like it makes more sense. Well, probably you got the vibe from John, Johnny. He saw the vibe. And then the manager knows what to do in those situations. He gets like the cue.
Having spoken to Bob Saget's manager, I can tell you that they are very close behind the celebrity following them. So, okay, that makes more sense. But don't you, I want to know what happens if you're a girl, you get invited to Justin Bieber's hotel. You roll up, are there just, it's like a stable of women just like eating like Cheez -Its. But also, there's other celebrity and
a bunch of his bros. I know. I just want to, I would like to see what it looks like. I'll never get to see it. went to a John Mayer concert within the year actually. Yeah. And I forgot how many good songs he has. Anyway. I didn't forget how many.
Your body is a my God. What other celebrities have you tried to go with? God. that one time. Okay. What is his name? Chris Klein, American Pie. Yes. Nova Casanova. We were at James Beach in Venice. Do you remember this? Yes. Okay.
see him at a bar. Also dating Dennis, maybe not dating Dennis at the time. I guess I dated Dennis most of the time. See kids, this is why you don't get a boyfriend right out of high school or college. You need to let your wings flap in the sky. I don't think I was seriously hitting on him, but I was more in the like, I'm going to be friends with you. I'm going to treat you normal. And he was like at a booth.
slid in, like came in hot, like slid in next to him and just said like, Hey, what's up? the look of disgust on his face of like, get out of my bench. I don't know who you are and what do you think you're doing was like so visceral. I've never experienced such.
rejection like that in my life, honestly. I would hate if someone rolled into a booth with me. That's a very intimate seating arrangement. he was not ever in the celebrity limelight the same way. Imagine a sloppy bar slide in, just sliding into the booth. Well, look, you have to take a shot. I remember - It wasn't in my gas station shirt, let's put it that way. I forget which restaurant I was at in Hollywood, and this was during the height of Sex and the
Sex and the City and Mr. Big, whatever the actor's name is, is sitting at the bar and I'm with my friends. I'm like, I'm gonna say hi, like whatever. Because I was that friend, like, Celeste will do it. And then I'd like put my big girl pants on, be like all nervous inside, but walk over. And a napkin for me. I asked him to do it and he was fine. I sat next to him. I don't know what I said, super drunk. Well, that's the key is like, what do you do? I feel like now the boss is taking pics.
But like, I didn't want an autograph, but you want to like commemorate the moment. I didn't know what to do. so now you have napkin from the napkin. I think I left it at the bar. Yeah. It was just the moment to connect with him. Did you say like, I love your work. I couldn't even tell you. I did it like with that, like confidence. My friends are snickering behind me and I was just trying to play it off. Cool.
I don't even remember. It was probably something really dumb, but I feel like it didn't matter. That's the thing. I like seeing celebrities, but I'm not shocked by it. But Vince Vaughn. Becoming friends with him is different. I think he could recognize me in a crowd. I think so too. He'd give you a double take. Like, yeah, I know her from somewhere. She's the girl who dresses kind of cute. In a casual, not trying sort of way.
I always try to remember this story so that I can steal it because my friend Christie, who has also been on the pod last week, she was in living in New York and was walking with coworkers and saw Keanu Reeves, another like highlight celebrity experience. You just want
I've heard interviews with him on like smart lists and he is seems like a rad complex dude that you don't he doesn't get credit for. Yeah, there's artistic and there are like so many stories about Keanu that I've read that he's like this amazing person. And so he's in his like classic tabloid look that I picture but overcoat beard, you know, whatever he's standing on street corner holding coffee and smoking a cigarette or sitting outside of a building waiting to go in or meeting someone and she walks by and co worker dares her to go say something and she's got that confidence that you have and that you're talking about.
And like, what do you do in that moment? And she just walks up and goes, a pie And he okay. Puts a cigarette in his mouth to free up a hand and gives her a high five. And they walk away like best celebrity moment. I want that. Keanu Reeves back in like the nineties, the height of Keanu Reeves as well. Yeah. And he was at, I went to guitar center, Hollywood with my family. Cause my dad. To do what?
My dad likes playing guitar instead of talking to me. Crying clown. And Keanu Reeves was there at the guitar center testing out drum set. Because he has a band. And then we left guitar center to go eat at the Hamburger Hamlet on Sunset. And Emilio Estevez was there. Double whammy. So just FYI, if you don't live in LA, come to LA.
It's where you go. I also saw Coolio and Hermosa Pier. my God. Also Rest In Peace. Damn it. Maybe we shouldn't meet celebrities. maybe. Maybe we're just old and everyone's just dying. That is what happens. Yes. God. Stop bringing it back to death. Coolio was supposed to be the musical act at our office party. I mean, this is a tech thing, first of all, right? But also that tells you what like older artists do. They're like,
gigging around, right? For things like this, for old people like he ended up canceling. And at the last minute, then we had to get bone thugs, which was - You got bone thugs? Amazing. But as my husband likes to joke, like, first of all, I don't think I could pick bone thugs out of a line -up necessarily except for the one guy with the hair. And so we don't know how many of them were actual bone thugs, but there was a -
group singing bone thugs. And I have a photo, we'll have to look it up and compare. I took a look. you think it was like a stand in bone thugs? No, I think it was definitely some original bones. By the way, bone thugs isn't like like it's an applied to everyone's liking like, no, no, it's a very specific taste. And it was wild. And then what's funny is they also did like covers of other 90s hip hop songs that were not their own. What if it wasn't actual bone thugs? If you're telling me it was a last minute.
It was, no it was how they booked themselves out, but whether or not that, what percentage of the original group I'm not positive. Here's where I'm at. This is a bunch of white chicks talking about like. I did go to Long Beach State, so I should know a little bit about the LBC. But no, I don't picture the Bone Thugs group, Bone Thugs in Harmony, wanting to do like gigs like that. But I guess. But I mean. For the right price. If a tech company is gonna pay, exactly. And we had to like set up a.
green room for them, which was our conference room. And it was just smelled like weed. in my youth, like middle school, high school, right? With my best friend at the time, we would sit and play bone things on repeat.
Crossroads, obviously. Well, that was great. We needed to know the words to crossroads. And so early days of the internet, we printed out lyrics, which who knows, wrote them and put them on the internet somewhere. This was like, my dad had early internet because he was an engineer. The first thing we ever did, I remember where we were sitting on my parents, like lazy boy, fired up the internet. My dad was showing us. We didn't understand what's going on. This like HTML page and bought a lava lamp.
something all of a sudden they knew. And that was I found the lyrics and sat there
So wait, was that your first choice? Like here is the internet. My daughter, Erica, type in anything you want and what you wanted was bone thugs. That's maybe the second or third thing. The first thing was a lava lamp. As a family, we bought a lava lamp. But that, yeah, I think it had become a part of our repertoire by then. You were able to buy something online at that point? Yes. I remember this well. I have to ask my dad what year that was.
And then the internet was a part of our life. And gosh, my friend and I were meeting people on AOL. We had boyfriends on AOL. You think they're boyfriends, but who knows? I know. This was like the most beautiful man I'd ever seen. I thought, wow, this is my like heaven. And we all talked about not wanting to have sex before we were married and like having all these like deep conversations. And then every once in a while like, say, send us photos and we'd send photos of, you know, Helena Christensen and other.
models that we were obsessed with. So this show, we tried to get one, Kate Mulder was the one we used because people didn't know her as well, but she was like, so you were giving fake pictures and you think the person who eventually showed them real photos, we also made a website that we could point people to. my God. So this shows our age difference because I'm two years older than Erica and I missed that whole like chatting with strangers. And it depended on your family's adoption of it, right? Like we had to have everything first.
I just never - I've had TiVo, like DVR, since I was a kid. My dad, before that existed on computers, my dad recorded every single program that we liked, preset the VHS to record them all. We like a library of VHS is labeled one through 32. And every week it would re -record over them. And he'd put a printout of the TV, our TV guide. And it would, what show do you want to watch? And it'd tell you what -
tape and what time code to watch. We'd skip over the commercials. my God. And then eventually made TiVo on his own computer and plugged his computer in and we watched everything downloaded from the internet. And then he tried to sell and he did end up selling it. TiVo had pretty much cornered the market, but he sold the hardware to Radio Shack. Private labeled it back in the day. Wow. Yeah. And he also invented something.
I'm not trying to, here we go. What's, what is it? He had a company called face link. Like,
seven years before like Facebook, but it was called FaceLink and I was in high school. So I was a senior. So this is 99, 2000. he was like, people need, when you have a business card, like you can't remember what they look like. Let's put your face on the web. That's what it was. It was like, you'd put your FaceLink on your business card so people could look you up and remember your face and you could connect and be friends. So it was like a Facebook page.
face link page. Business. Business. And it wasn't obviously like quickly adopted soon. The problem that we have is my dad is like, this awesome visionary makes anything happen, but he's not, he always needed a business partner. He can't like take it to market. So I think he had a partner who helped him a little bit, but this one didn't take off hugely. But what it did do is 90s closeted homosexuality because it was not nearly widely as accepted as it is now.
found their way to the internet, right? Because you could be yourself and anonymous on the internet and have this be yourself there. And so something about the JavaScript on our face link matched with the script on gay .com. So everyone on gay .com was using face link as their like look at photos of me. somehow it was like really shareable. So the entire adoption of it was men finding each other on the internet. So my high school job,
in the editing software that my dad had to make on the back end was to crop out the penises of... I wasn't expecting... I'm going to be honest. I'm going to be totally honest and expect that. My high school job was to come from after school. Here's the old computer, hon. Yep. Penis time. Penis time because we couldn't have nudities. So you got to see a wide range of what penises could look like. Yes. Wearing cowboy hats, wearing all different things.
And sometimes it was just the penis. There was no cropping you could do. You had to reject it. Was there like a wide range of penises? Like, are they all? That is not... It was just all... But it's so funny that that didn't even register. Like... That's good. Yeah. Okay. Keep going with your story. This is amazing. Actually, it's a really good question. I'm like, is this a part of some Harvard, like, sexual dysfunction that I have or something? You know, is this part... You were like desensitized and had to look at...
a bunch of penises every day after school. But the best was like, if there was a really good one, we wanted to share it. And so I got a button in the editor that would send it to this email group of our friends. So let me get this straight. Your dad had you come home from school and your extracurriculars before dinner maybe and just go through like hundreds of penises, crop them out. So you'd have to like zoom in on the penis. It was really a standard cropping tool. A standard cropping tool, but.
Your eyes would see this square. And then if his daughter felt like the penis was notable, hey sweetie, send those good ones to this link. So then you did have to have it like it's discerning eye. Like you had to pick up. Yes. But my mom, I think our whole family was helping with this. So it wasn't just me. So if someone's walking by the - Startup culture, you know?
If you had your blinds open and you guys are the families inside the house, like a passerby might just see a bunch of like family members looking at penises. so who received the good penis pictures? My dad's friend Moe, my uncle Darryl, my mom, probably my aunt Sherry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's this guy named Moe, it just went straight to Moe. We don't know what Moe did with it, but I'm sure it was fine.
Wait, that's crazy. I was also the face of facelink my scene was like the one on the homepage, you know a different name
This is wild. You know what works out well about this is that we're newish friends. we have a lot of new stories to tell each other. So your old friends will obviously know this about you. And this is the first time I'm hearing this and it's shocking. And I'm going to think about this like a lot. Like when you found out my son's names were not in their names. ⁓ yeah. I just found out like a week or so ago after knowing you for over a
that's like really wild. Was this like a long stretch of time that you did that? No, no. It's just my senior year. So my sister didn't help because she was in college. So no, it was just like a chunk of my senior year. So just your mom?
my God. She always helped all of his startups. She was like HR and accounting. I know, but penis cropping specifically. Okay. That's cool. Is this link still active? Wait, so he sold it. I would love to get old archived web pages of my dad's businesses or my like weird website that I made with my best friend where he posted photos of us in like skimpy dresses and they weren't trying to be like lingerie, but we were like - What was the name of your website? I'm sure it was like - Slez .com.
Sorry, you know what's funny? I just realized you said sluts .com and it sounded like Celeste .com. Your name rings a bell with... It's funny you should mention that. So a young Celeste at a Hermosa Pier at the bar, what's your name? You know, you're screaming to some guy who's begging for your name, begging. And you go Celeste. John Mayer begging for your name. Yeah. So you say Celeste, loudly but quickly and at least I'd say half the time, maybe like no.
30 % of the time the guy would go, excuse me? And I go, you thought I said slut, right? And they're like, yeah. I'm like, no, no, no. So it was a common thing. That's a really great icebreaker actually, because you're like, I know it well enough. I'm chill with it, but I'm not a slut. I'm sure I had like something to follow up with like, but I'm not a slut. But you know, something stupid. I'm real class and house. But I loved it.
How many times did someone have to say, excuse me, before you figured out what they were not hearing? I don't know. My memory of those days aren't as sharp. No, they aren't as sharp. But I'm sure they were like, I thought you said slut. And you're like, what? Slut. What? Slut. Yes. during those times, people thought, you know what slubbery you look like? I'd be like, please don't say it. And they would always say the same actress. Who was it? Melissa Joan Hart. And I would go,
Yeah, F you with the double fingers. How dare you wait? She's awesome. I get that. She looks like a child. She's got a good personality. She is not attractive and she was in can't hardly wait. yeah, she was at the end and like a cameo was great. No, she had like the picture. She was in the air. But I feel like she was playing. I guess you're right. She wasn't playing. I feel she was peppered in, but she was very clearly playing
the exaggerated version of what she was known for, right? Like this funky, quirky. Well, whatever it is, she has like a lazy, like a lazy. No, Melissa Joan Hart, we love you. Don't, if you hear this. Look, I'm not attractive either. Stop it. You are beautiful. Look, John Mayer is not locking up to me anymore. No, stop it. First of all, we're not doing that on this podcast. John Mayer is going to be like, hey, slut, give me a beer.
I'm done. I think that's when I lost all sense of confidence. Maybe that's where it all ended. Sorry, Melissa.
wait, so, okay. So always Melissa Joan Hart, anyone else? Cause then I'll do mine. No, literally that's it. I'm going to have to spend some time thinking of this. So I really wanted to speak to my love for the movies, wanted to be in casting. That's like the secret joy of mine. I think that I see the things in people that are more nuanced about their facial features, which often they don't want to know.
But like I look at, your eyes are close together or your head, like more of the audience, instead of, she's a blonde who's five, six. Like that's, cause that's what I always got. I just got all the top ones. And I'm like, well, if you actually break down our features, that's not what I look like. So Dennis and I disagree all the time. People look at like the broad thing. I kind of like to draw in very specific pieces. So I will spend some time thinking about this. I love, I got Heather Graham a couple of times. I love that. And the pigtails helps with that. So I'm going to think about this because.
I love the who would play you in a movie thing and then you get to have your choice. I have a feeling you're going to think about it and you're going to tell me. You're not going to like it. I'm going to hate it. No one ever likes it. I don't, just don't tell me that. Okay, then I will. I think, I think. Do you not like Heather Graham? Because I love that. I do. Well, that was good. That's probably the best one I've heard so far. Yeah. So like I'll just stick with that. I stick with But I always got, and I'm not.
complaining about these, I just don't actually think I look like them. Like Charlize Theron or who else? Wait, Charlize is the one I got or Amy Smart started in high school, which actually could work for you too. She's a tall blonde. I think whoever saw that, at least they recognize we both have really long necks, but she has a very round face with wide eyes. I think she's very pretty. I love that movie Road - I don't think you look like anybody.
So Jenna Elfman was my other favorite because she also had a really long neck. I agree. I don't think I look exactly because I have this flat profile and long neck and round features and a lot of people don't have round features. That's what I was told when I was tall and people thought I should be a model. Then I was told, no, you have round features. You'll never make it. I'm sitting over here, Melissa Joan Hart, like a creature in the shadows. You're like,
You know, people said I should be a model, but I don't know. I didn't. That's just what people say when you're tall. And then I was like, well, print models are not tall and runway models. I'm too tall to be a runway model. And I hadn't hit puberty yet, so I was skinny. But it didn't feel like this means you're the most beautiful person. You know, it was like heroin chic, skinny models. But anyways. Yes, I know all about being a model. I was approached to be.
to go to John Robert Powers. You remember? Heck yeah, I got swindled. So I actually went and did cotillion type classes to learn how to use your table settings. But that, circling back, that's how I got my two meter two gig. See? They taught us how to walk with books on our head too. That stands for me. But I'm glad that you need a way to learn that body posture. That was a very positive experience for me. Yeah.
people say like, whenever someone says they see your doppelganger, you're like, don't, I don't want to look, don't look, don't look. It's not going to be flattering. Right. And all my college friends agreed. We are at this restaurant in San Francisco in the Marina.
someone walks in and they all go, my God, you're doppelganger just walked in the door. Everyone agreed. And I finally figured out what they see that I don't see when I'm looking in the mirror. And this is where I had to confront my profile where it's like a soft inaction of the cheek to the neck instead of like a firm draw line and a very like flattened, flattened head shape. And I'm not, this is not disparaging. I love me and my body and I'm very happy. But like,
I had no idea that this kind of flat cheek to neck connection was a notable thing about me because when you look and you smile, and then that is the only thing that they thought. I mean, I saw this girl, she had her hair in a bun, she had a flat head and her cheek connected into her neck from the side with no jawline. And then that's when I knew. Yeah. By the way, my friend calls that a check, but she's talking about this because like cheek neck is a check. But this is something like I would have never noticed. I don't know. Well, I - It is now.
I hate, I am the worst at being photographed. Enough to where when Kirk and I got married, there was someone that came in for a wedding that I don't know from Kirk's friends, Colorado. And the person comes up to me after the wedding, he's like an older guy, he says, wow, you're so much prettier than your picture. As I'm in a goddamn wedding dress. I mean, obviously he thinks that's nice.
So telling someone they're photogenic is actually not nice because it's saying like you photograph better than you look in real life. Look, I know I'm not photogenic, but like now it's like someone had confirmed it and I'm like, God, shut the hell up. And so I shouldn't say his name, but I know his name and I'll never forget it. So I might ask. He destroyed your confidence. Yeah, like shut up, man. Anyway, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Inside.
And I do agree. Yeah.
I don't know what to expect for today. Me either. I do know that we were up late last night watching, we went to the movie theater. I did want to talk about that movie, but I don't know that we are critics who could like dive into it in any meaningful way, but we did see the movie Babes. Yeah. Which is Ilana something, Glazer, I can't remember her name. I don't know their names. But she's amazing and her best friend. A raunchy, but very heartfelt movie birthing and mothering.
I highly recommend, I cried a lot at the end and I got a little judgment for that, but that's okay. We got 14 moms together, which is a crazy feat. Yeah. Monday night, first of summer, ready to go. And we commuted to this movie. Yeah. And we had a fun dinner. It was good. It was really good outing. I thought it was going to be like a bridesmaids, like ha ha. You didn't think it was like a bridesmaids? No, no, no, no. it got too heartfelt. It was.
deeper and darker than I thought it would be. But it was funny. I'm trying to think, doesn't, I thought all good comedies these days. I guess I'm thinking of the Judd Apatow era where they're all masquerading as a raunchy comedy, but they are like a rom -com or heartfelt in the chorus. Yeah, but I think, so here, my only thing with the movie Last Night Babes is that there was a lot of over talking to really drive it home how hard it is.
to be a mom and like the things that we have to go. They did have to do it very literally. They did a very little wife sitting on the bed explaining their feelings. And you are my family. We're not just for and they kind of over talked it. Yeah, I get it. It really worked for me. But I get what you're saying. Yeah. So no, it was good. But we stayed up late. So I don't know what I expected today to be like, because we didn't discuss like, hey, let's talk about this or that. No, I had planned on bringing some prompts, which I think maybe we'll do in the future. Like I have a
question for you or I've been thinking about this or whatever, but I guess it was fun for a first episode. I don't know if anyone will enjoy this, but we had a lot of tech issues So now we were here. We earned it. So I think If someone listens to this, great. Hi. Thanks. And tell us how it was. And do you want to hear friend chat more like this? Because I, maybe. I mean, maybe.
And if you do, we could wear matching outfits next time. We have enough to make it through a few podcasts. my God, yeah. And yeah, thanks for having me. Thanks for joining, Robin. And I enjoy it. Robin to my Howard. That's me. I need to come up with some more material though. I want to have - I don't want bits. You don't want bits? I mean, I don't want prepared bits. Like if you feel it in the moment - I love bits. I love segments where like we do recurring things that we give in. Yeah. I like a segment. Yeah.
I love that over like, I planned this funny joke, but the idea that, okay, like slut corner or something, you know, when we talk about bad stories, you know. Slutcorner .com. Penis crop. Yeah, exactly. Like things will come about that are recurring and give them funny names. I like a segment name. Like this segment's called what? When did... What, bitch? By the way, when did that... I love slang and phrases. When did the... I love a quiz. I love a segment.
I love a white shoe. I love a, you know what I mean? Like we didn't used to say that. You say like, I love segments, I know what you're talking about. Yeah. But it's a thing now. It's a thing and you say it a certain way with like a certain inflection. I Humanity is weird, man. I read once somewhere that language is a parade.
You stand still and watch it pass you by because it changes so much. Yeah, I know. We were talking about that at dinner last night about all the new... No, I was at the end of the table. I don't know what I meant. And I'm like, you guys, we sound so old. Like, what does Riz mean? I'm like, God damn it. God. Shut up. We've had that conversation a lot lately. I don't want to be around it. I'm embracing it because I want to be the mom who's using it to her kid to make them cringe so much they stop using it. And now I've affected.
them in like a funny way. That's my goal. I hear you, but I also... Because they're not going to think I'm cool, like to bring it back to what we started in this conversation. They're not going to think I'm cool, even if I think they think I'm cool. They're going to be annoyed. It's not cringe. It's worse than cringe though. It's like annoyed, like stop. Well, that's going to happen anyway. So at least might as well get some joy and like grabbing out of it. All right. That's one way to torture them. Yeah. Jealous?
Some ribbing, is that the word I'm looking for? yeah, ribbing. Maybe that's what I was thinking of. Get some jabs out of it. Kids love when old ladies mess with them. Summary of the episode. Yeah, shut up old bag. That's the segment. Yeah. Shut up old bag. Things that us old ladies are doing. Yeah. Come here, you. this is so, you've got so much riz. This is so fire. Sigma, Ohio, skibbity. Okay, we just have to stop. Okay.
Sorry. No, I mean, we have to stop. We have to stop with that language. And we have to stop anyway. We do have to stop. So it's been real is what my mom always says and I love that. See, that's old too. It's old. It's been real. Keep it real on the flip -flop. Peace out. I just did a west side. gosh. Peace out and have a wonderful day. Please, yes. Have a delightful, amazing day.