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"A LOT with Audra" is the podcast for women juggling big dreams and full lives. Each episode, host, Audra Dinell, Midwestern wife, mom and neurodivergent multi-six figure entrepreneur encourages women to embrace their many roles holistically by living a values-based life with confidence and joy. Through candid discussions, practical strategies and inspiring stories, this podcast is your guide to designing and achieving success without losing yourself in the process.
Ep81
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Dream Becomes Real
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[00:00:00]
Audra Dinell: [00:01:00] The second act where the dream stops becoming theoretical. It's no longer just the idea you journal about, pray about, or imagine when you're driving alone in your car. At some point, the dream becomes a calendar, a client, or a price, and that is where so much of the real becoming happens, not just in the leap itself, but in the building that follows.
Meet Lee Gray
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Audra Dinell: Today's guest, Lee Gray, lives right at that intersection. Lee Gray is a business coach, speaker, entrepreneur, and the owner of Action Coach Business Coaching in Wichita, Kansas. Over the past decade, she has helped more than 100 business owners build stronger companies by increasing profits, developing leaders, creating high-performing teams, and giving owners more freedom in their lives.
Before becoming a coach, Lee owned multiple businesses and held executive leadership roles in sales, marketing, and business [00:02:00] development. Today, she combines real-world experience with practical coaching strategies that help business owners move from feeling overwhelmed to building businesses that work without depending on them every day.
Lee is also the host of the Second Act Business Owner podcast and is the author of the upcoming book, Second Act Business Owner, which encourages people that it is never too late to build a meaningful and profitable next chapter. She is passionate about helping entrepreneurs discover what's possible, take meaningful action, and create businesses and lives they truly love.
Lee's motto is, "Whatever you do, take action." Let's get into it with Lee Gray.
Welcome, Lee, to the podcast.
Lee Gray: Thank you. I am so glad to be here.
Audra Dinell: I'm so glad that you're here, and I love that we have the second act outline in common.
Lee Gray: We do. Mm-hmm.
Audra Dinell: So you've stepped into your own second act as a business owner and a coach. What was the [00:03:00] brave leap for you, and what did you not fully understand until you were on the other side of it?
Lee Gray: Oh, such a great, deep question. M- my- Braveness, like most people in their second act, was n- not intentional. ~A-~ and I suspect most people are not gonna start a second act intentionally. ~It...~ Some gift is given to you to start it. It could be an inter- something inter, it could be external, it could be an illness, it could be whatever.
I'm doing something different because there's more to life than where I am right now, and that's really what, to me, defines a second act. Can happen any time in your life, and you can have many second acts.
Laid Off at 50
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Lee Gray: For me, I had a really great job. So I've always had side hustles. Some made money, some didn't. I mean, true entrepreneur, right?
You, you know what I'm talking about. And I had a job as a marketing director for a, a technology company, and, um, the president that hired me retired, and someone else came on in his place, and they fired me after about two months. ~And,~ and I was 50 years old, 5-0, when that happened. [00:04:00] Wow. And I cried for two days, and then I figured out, you know what?
No one gets Lee down, ever. So the brave part came with, what can I do that I haven't done before? And at this point, I was starting to look for jobs, and I thought, "Nobody will even hire me." I felt like I, I was 90, not 50. And I was a 90-year-old woman trying to find a position. And so that's, that, that was the, what started with me.
And my husband said, "You know, you love to help people. Figure out a way you can help people. You love to talk, you love to present, you love to speak. Figure out a way you can help people." So I started looking at different franchises, and that's how I ended up with Action Coach, which is what I do. I own a Action Coach business coaching firm.
Our 11th year will be in September of 2026. So it's very- Mm. Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you. So that's... I say that's ~my,~ my final second a- my, this second act, but I have another second act I'm working on with my book. I'm writing a book called ~uh, ~Second Act Business Owner a- as well. ~Um,~ and so second acts, mine are compounding.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: Compounding.
Audra Dinell: And I love [00:05:00] before... I love a couple of things. Before we started recording, you were like, "I'm on my fourth or fifth second act." Mm-hmm. And I love that thought, that ~we're, ~we're using the second act as just sort of like a jumping-off point or a realization that it's like you can have multiple acts in your life, and they're not all even one.
The second act can be five different second acts.
Lee Gray: I love it.
Audra Dinell: I also love that you said we're given a gift. Usually people don't come into your second act- Mm-hmm ... on purpose- Mm-hmm ... but it's because of a gift, and then you're considering a layoff at 50 a gift. So I just love- That's right ... that mindset. Mm-hmm.
Gift and Retaliation
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Audra Dinell: Like, how important do you think that is to entrepreneurship and success?
Lee Gray: The mindset, whatever it is, is gonna drive you or drive you crazy.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: And so you have to be very mindful of it. ~And, ~and mine went from gratitude ~a-~ and a gift to retaliation. I am going to show them that they messed with the wrong person.
And I haven't been more successful in my [00:06:00] life than I've been in this, in this act that I'm in now. ~And, and,~ and so I say retaliation, it wasn't outward retaliation, but boy was I ever gonna show them wrong- Yeah ... to be- that they were wrong, and I'm glad I did.
Audra Dinell: It was just that internal
Lee Gray: fire. So much so. Mm-hmm.
And so that was a mindset, and, you know, winning and moving and doing things harder than ever requires something you haven't felt before, some kind of thing you haven't ever felt before. 'Cause if you feel the same, you do the same.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: And that, that gift of gratitude, feeling of gratitude, combined with I'm showing them, has led me way faster and further along than I ever thought I would be, you know?
And, and luckily we can't dream our second act until we're in it, so I say for all your listeners, you know, if you're thinking of something or if, if you've been given a gift,~ just,~ just step o- step over it and ~take, ~take the next step because something's out there. And if not, do something different. That's what I love about the second act, too.
It's not in stone.
Audra Dinell: Right.
Lee Gray: Doesn't have to be in stone, yeah.
Audra Dinell: You can write it every single day. That's
Lee Gray: right.
Audra Dinell: I have [00:07:00] found in the conversations I've had about second acts that oftentimes they've come from a really low point, like getting laid off- Mm-hmm ... or having a business close to failure or deciding that you need to become sober or a relationship ending.
Yeah. Like a real low point.
You were like, "I've worked, I've been more successful in this act. I've worked harder." And ~you mentioned,~ you said something right before you said, ~um, how you fee-~ if you feel how you've always felt, then that's-
Lee Gray: Oh, yeah, yeah, there we go. Yeah. Yeah, if you feel how you've always felt, you're gonna do the same things you feel like doing.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: So a feeling of, ~of ~gratitude or a feeling of despair are the same things that move people.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: You know, it can be a positive or a negative. ~And,~ and typically, you're right, it is a negative thing that moves people to a, a second act, a bigger than. But I think it does transition from, ~uh, a,~ a gift and acce- acceptance to ch- "I'm going to show you."
There's something so powerful in that. Athletes f- have that. You know, even if it's to themselves, "I'm [00:08:00] going to show you. I'm gonna show my family, my friends, people who, who don't care. I'm gonna show, show you all." So I think that's what I,~ I, I w-~ wanna share, and make sure that people wait until you get to that point, ~'cause,~ 'cause it will happen.
You're gonna get there, ~um,~ once the, the gift of the gift wears off a little bit. Yeah.
Audra Dinell: Okay, so what's on the other side?
Lee Gray: On the other side is whatever you want it to be. ~You know, um, there is... You get to be... ~Well, first of all, in your second act, you're the smartest you've ever been. You're the most educated you've ever been.
You're the most talented you've ever been. You're m- probably the most eager that you've ever been, and on the other side of that is anything you want.
Ownership Mindset Shift
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Audra Dinell: But what made this second act for you, like, the most successful?
Lee Gray: I think it was doing in my business what I teach people to do in my business, ~which in my...~
So someone i- in a second act might be thinking, "Oh, I'm gonna write a book," or, "I'm going to start a business," or, "I'm going to go back to college and go or get, get my PhD." ~. ~
Audra Dinell: ~Because, like, what I'm- Oh, okay ... ~I guess what I'm trying to understand, that I'm curious about is, you know, you're like, "Okay, I got l- [00:09:00] a gift-" Mm-hmm ... "laid off at 50. No one gets laid down, and now I've been the most successful in this act that I've ever been."
But you've obviously had to, like, stretch yourself, so I'm curious about, like, that. Okay. Like, how have you stretched yourself? Mm-hmm. What has it looked like? ~What,~ what have you done, either mindset or actions or habits, that have m- made you the most successful?
Lee Gray: Okay.~ I, I think what,~ I think what I wanna share with you in that regard is that I am still today, if I was in another role, not in my, my business, not in my second act, and this happened to me, something, whatever it is, day activity, something made me mad, l- lost a client, whatever.
If I was working for someone else, what would I do? Now that I have my own business and I'm in my second act, what can I do ~to,~ to make this better, to improve the situation, to learn from it? It's just, it's a different mindset when it comes to ownership, you know?
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: And I think the o- o- [00:10:00] ownership is big.
~It's, it's big. And,~ and that identity is, is challenging for people. We coach our clients, if you're the founder of something, to introduce yourself as a founder. ~We-~ if you're a hairdresser, you don't introduce yourself as a hairdresser. You introduce yourself as the owner of a hair salon or, ~or if, if,~ if you are an owner, rather.
And in a, even if you're a hair stylist, your second act could be, "I am an expert in color, and my colors that I love are blue, red, and pink," or whatever, you know, that is that you can own. And, ~and make that be,~ make that be something special, because it is. Whatever you are in your second act is special. It really is, so.
Audra Dinell: And just, I think ~what I,~ what I'm hearing is when you were working for other people, there was less drive to take that extreme ownership. Mm-hmm. But when something happened in your business that- would rock you, you were sort of forced to take that ownership and switch that to, "Okay, this [00:11:00] happened. What can I do?"
Mm-hmm. Because, like, the buck stops here- Yeah ... essentially.
Lee Gray: Go to any lengths to figure it out.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: Go to any length, which is what an owner would do, right? Go to any length to figure it out. If you're a, an employee, you go home, might clock out at 5:00. And there ~i-~ you do clock out as a business owner, but you also don't wanna clock out.
~A- a-~ and so it's fun ~in some,~ in some cases to experience it, ~uh, a-~ and to know that ~you've,~ you've created the challenges, ~you've the,~ you've solved the challenges that you've had. And it creates neurons. So I think you get, creates those ~new nu-~ new neurons in the brain. You know, we talk about neuroplasticity, and I know you've had some guests who have talked about these amazing things, which I have so much respect for.
But we can still impact our learning and our growth and those neurons in our brain, and I feel like I am 10 times smarter today than I was 12 years ago. Oh, that's exciting. I, I mean 10 times.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: M- maybe not. I think I am. So, you know, there you go. Entrepreneur.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. Yeah.
Lee Gray: I think I am.
Audra Dinell: I think that's exciting.
Yeah, yeah. I mean, that just really energizes me. Mm-hmm. So
Why Second Acts Work
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Audra Dinell: you've named your [00:12:00] podcast The Second Act Business Owner.
Lee Gray: Right.
Audra Dinell: ~When you see... Wait, back up.~ What do you see happening for people in that season of life or career? Like, what are they trying to leave, and what are they hoping that entrepreneurship will gift them?
Lee Gray: ~Uh, what I, what I love to see, so and I, and I, ~my podcast is out there, and I'm starting to get some people that I run into in circles even outside of my local circle, circle here, that, "I'm thinking about my second act. I loved what you said about your second act." And I think there's something about calling it your second act that's different than calling it, "Oh, I'm going back to school," or, "I'm starting a job," or, "I'm..."
Because a second act is anything you want it to be, and there's no judgment around it. There's no judgment around having a second act. And everyone's like, "Oh, love that for you." So there's almost a permission to start a second act when, if someone comes to you and says, " You know, I think I'm gonna go back to, back to school," or, "I'm gonna get another job," oh, yay for you.
But if they say, "I'm gonna start a second act. I'm gonna reinvent myself. I'm gonna ~u- I'm gonna~ upstage myself and become my best self." ~A- and I,~ that excitement, I see that in people [00:13:00] in their second act, ~and,~ and they love to own the word. It's just an, ~it's,~ it's a believable thing for entrepreneurs and people in their second act that they can believe that's true for them.
I'm in my second act.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. There's something- ... powerful in the branding of that-
Lee Gray: There is ...
Audra Dinell: that, like you said, gives permission.
Lee Gray: Mm-hmm.
Audra Dinell: And so when business owners that you work with are leaving a job and coming to you to get coaching for their journey, ~what do you think it is that they're- choo-~ why do you think they choose entrepreneurship?
Why not just get another job?
Lee Gray: Well, I think that they know they can do better, because they are the smartest they've ever been. They may not say that out loud, but something in them, them is telling them, "I can do it better today than ever."
Audra Dinell: Yeah. A-
Lee Gray: and I'm not gonna necessarily grow if I stay in my job.
There's nothing wrong if you wanna be happy, and can be happy ~in a, in a,~ in a job, and it can grow, and you wanna grow. ~Uh,~ but man, ~when,~ when you know you can do better, and you get to do better, it's really powerful for, for most people. ~I have a-~ I've got accountant clients, construction clients, every kind of client you can think of, and [00:14:00] they're all happier being in that second act than they were when they were working with, for someone.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. ~What do you think- H-~
Traits of Winners
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Audra Dinell: what have you seen, if you could say, like, one to three common traits of successful entrepreneurs? ~Like,~ you've been in this business working for and with entrepreneurs for 11 years. What are the traits? Like, what are the things that make-
success?
Lee Gray: . Well, here's the thing, ~um,~ Audra. That's a great question, because you're probably gonna, your listeners might be thinking, "Oh, wait, I'm gonna really hone in, 'cause it's some big, giant, crazy, amazing thing that Leigh's gonna say." But what I'm gonna say is ~be on time wherever you go.~
~I'm a little late today. Uh, ~be on time in life for everything. Mm-hmm. They're- and that's what they are. They're on time. And when they say they're gonna do something, they do something. And the third thing is believing that they can.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: A- and, and those things sound so simple. Gosh, that wasn't magic at all.
But imagine if you apply those three things to everything you do in your business, ~y-~ almost are guaranteed success.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: And that's a very, those common traits in people. ~Uh, I just,~ they come to the [00:15:00] coaching session, "Hey, I've got all my work done, but I had some questions," or, ~um,~ "I've been thinking about this.
~Uh,~ tell me what you think." They'll do research on stuff without being told or asked to do it. ~Um,~ so I would say those, ~those ~things are common. ~And,~ and people start showing up with those traits before their second act, but they really start to recognize them, m- you know, when they really n- need ~to, to, ~to use them as strengths.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: Yeah.
Audra Dinell: Well, I love that. Simple. Be on time, do what you say you're gonna do, and believe that you can.
Lee Gray: Yeah. I mean, think about it. ~That's,~ that's what every Olympian athlete does. That's what every person with a illness diagnosis does. And ~if they're,~ if they're gonna t- go to the other side. ~And, and,~ and so it's really applicable to second act, any kind of second act.
Audra Dinell: Yeah, for sure.
Passion vs Business
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Audra Dinell: So where do you see people confusing passion, experience, or expertise with readiness to start a business, if you do?
Lee Gray: Yeah. ~Um- Okay.~ That's a really good question, too. So, ~um,~ a second act might come from, "Ugh, this job is... I could do [00:16:00] better than the boss. They won't listen to me," or whatever, "So I'm gonna start my own business."
And if you've read any books around starting a business, there's the, The E Myth, and then there's lots of books written by Brad Sugars, the founder of Action Coach, ~on this,~ on this too. But business owners start as a great technician, for example. In some ways, I'm glad I didn't have a skill. I had to learn everything to become a coach.
I, I think it's probably better. I didn't learn everything. My experience brought me to it, too. But, ~um,~ I think one of the challenges is you're a great accountant, you're a great attorney, you're a great whatever, and then you continue to do that well, and then you end up buying yourself a job.
Audra Dinell: Right.
Lee Gray: And that happens.
80% of businesses can't be sold because no one else is there to do the work.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: ~And,~ and that's still a common challenge. Okay. That still, still is.
Audra Dinell: That makes a ton of sense, because I talk to a lot of people who have a passion around a thing- Mm-hmm ... and they choose to try and make a living off this passion, and yeah, I was just kind of curious, like, what patterns you saw there.
Mm-hmm. So that makes a ton of sense. [00:17:00] Yeah. On that same note-
let's say that you have a business owner who comes to you, and they are just, like, so passionate, and, ~uh, like,~ that is me too. I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm... Th- that's, ~like,~ my strength. I am passionate about a lot of things. Yeah. Mm-hmm. ~What, ~
Sales and Marketing Muscles
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Audra Dinell: if they were not going to buy themselves a job, if they're gonna be part of the 20%, what muscle would you have them build first?
Lee Gray: Well, I would have them, ~uh,~ build their sales muscle. Mm. 'Cause you're selling, no matter what you're doing. ~Uh,~ financial acumen, understanding... I'll take them through an exercise. How many things or projects or services are you going to have to sell to pay yourself, and then to, so that the business make, makes money?
~Uh,~ so they're gonna have to have muscles in selling and finance, ~and,~ and in their craft. But honestly, sales and marketing is the two muscles that any business owner or anybody on the other side in a second act is gonna have to get good at. You know, 'cause the, no matter what we're told, all the marketing things that there are in the world, you have to keep working on them in [00:18:00] order to...
Yeah, it's not one and done. I mean, Coca-Cola has never stopped advertising, and neither can your business, neither can your second act. So the sooner you recognize, the sooner that's recognized, and the sooner you embrace the sales process. ~And,~ and the thing about sales, it's not a bad thing. If you don't sell somebody what you have, they don't get your passion.
Your passion is, if you're passionate about your business, you've got to sell that-
Audra Dinell: Yeah ...
Lee Gray: ~too.~
Audra Dinell: Well, and I always think about it as the responsibility to make sure that anyone who could benefit from what I have to sell knows about it. That's all I'm trying to do. Mm-hmm. Make sure everyone-
Lee Gray: Right ...
Audra Dinell: knows about it so that if someone could benefit from it- Mm-hmm
they have access to it.
Lee Gray: That's right.
Audra Dinell: So it's like that mindset switch. But I do love what you said. It's not just set it and forget it. It's ongoing, it's learning, it's refining, it's ~continu-~ continually staying out there.
Lee Gray: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Audra Dinell: Or would you say [00:19:00] delegating and finding others to
Lee Gray: do that? Oh, that's even better.
Yeah. That's even better. Yeah. ~And,~
Busy vs Business
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Lee Gray: and the three things that a business owner has to do, ~um, you know,~ three things If you're going to grow, you have to figure out what are the absolute things you have to do.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: And what are the absolute things you have to dump.
Audra Dinell: Mm.
Lee Gray: And the, what are the absolute things you can delegate?
~And,~ and that starts with getting really clear on where I'm spending my time. I mean, with my clients, and ~I'm,~ I'm not exempt from this either, I have to update my time study and see where I'm spending my time, just like my clients do, take them through setting up, up a default calendar. ~You know,~ if you're busy all week long, and you accomplish nothing, or didn't sell something, or give somebody what they needed for your product, then you probably were just~ you probably were just B-U-Z-Y, not B-U...~
~You ~B-U-S-Y, not doing B-U-S, business. ~Spelled all that wrong. But, you know,~ you know, we can feel busy without doing the right things. And, ~uh,~ knowing what to do, who to delegate it to, and then what, what to stop doing, oh, it's almost as important sometimes to stop than it is to ~s-~ to keep doing.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Scaling Fears and Stories
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Audra Dinell: What happens when [00:20:00] someone owns a business and they decide, "Okay, it's time to really grow this thing bigger than solopreneurship, bigger than beyond me."
Like, they've chosen, like, "Okay, I'm gonna put my foot on the gas and grow." What type of fears or stories show up for them?
Lee Gray: Oh my gosh. ~Uh, the same...~ I have a granddaughter ~who's,~ who's trying out for a volleyball team. ~Am I...~ And she's so good, and she's so skilled, and she practices all the time, and she lives and learns about volleyball, volleyball, volleyball, and yet she's still worried, "Am I gonna be good enough?
And am I gonna be able to compete? What are people gonna say? What if I make a mistake?" And, you know, ~she's,~ she knows she's going to make the team. ~And,~ and most of us as business owners know we're smart enough to do it, but the fear. ~Fear is, is...~ In a conversation I'll have it with a coaching client in one hour, there'll be more than sometimes three or four fear statements.
~Uh,~ one this morning, this client, I said, "What about hiring somebody to create the sales channel for you so that you don't [00:21:00] have to do the..." And he named three reasons why it was probably not a good idea to even consider it. Oh, gosh, all those terrible things were gonna happen. I said, "Wait.
Hold on a minute. I- ha- are you 100% sure that's going to happen? And what research have you done?" ~Most likely, we, we do, we,~ we more often don't do something than we overdo something.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: And I think that happens, too. So fear of, oh, fear of what people think. Mm. And we all know at the end of the day, the person I'm thinking about is me.
Audra Dinell: Mm-hmm.
Lee Gray: Not you.
Audra Dinell: Mm-hmm.
Lee Gray: And you're not thinking about me. Mm-mm. It's just, that's just how we're built.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: So letting that guide any action you do as a business owner is, needs to change because it will, ~it will~ be a demise. That's probably a demise, what do people think, more than anything.
Audra Dinell: So if someone is starting to want to scale their business, what would you have them look at first?
I would- Fear- fears aside. Mm-hmm. If they're like, "Okay, I've made this decision. I'm working with you. You're gonna call out my fears so I can step over them." Uh-huh.
Lee Gray: Uh-huh.
Audra Dinell: What-
Lee Gray: Okay. ~I,~
Dreams Goals Learning Action
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Lee Gray: I think we, we need to decide, okay, what does it look like? [00:22:00] Draw it out. ~Um,~ tell me your dream. ~Is-~ give me the big story. Whisper to me how big it's going to be.
Yeah. I won't tell anyone that, what your dream is, but they've gotta get it out. You know, it's gotta, it's gotta get out of their head and into the world, into the space, into the universe. So I would have them... We do that with clients. We take them through a process where, give me your dreams, and then let's figure out what the business needs to do in order to help you achieve those dreams.
So if your dream is a passion dream, for example, to help 1,000 women be confident. Let's just say that's kind of a vague thing. But,~ uh, i-~ in the process, you would say, "Okay, we're gonna work with that. We're gonna, we're gonna work with 1,000 women. We're gonna figure out what it's gonna take to do that. ~Um, ho-~ ho- how much will it cost you to do that?
What kind of education do you need to, in order to do that? What do you need to learn? Who do you need to hire? ~Uh,~ what plan do you need to make?" ~It's,~ it's a formula called DGLPA. It's your dreams multiplied by your learning- Okay ... multiplied by your ~DG- o- uh,~ D, [00:23:00] dream. G, ~um,~ goals.
Audra Dinell: Goals. I was like-
Lee Gray: Yeah ... I'm sure it's goals, right?
Uh, yes it is. Yeah. Yeah. L, learning. ~Uh,~ planning, and then action.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: You know, action's, uh, kinda the last thing, but I would rather take action on a big dream than to take action on a little dream. Yeah. So we wanna dream big to begin with, and that's really one of the things- People will sit across from us at the table at the strategic planning session for their business, for their second act, and go, "Oh, ~I- y- y-~ you think I could, you really think I could have a business and only work one day a week?"
Well, I think you could. What do you think?
So even though it's not an accounting thing or it's not a functional thing, we start with dreams.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. This morning I was doing some journaling, and one of the prompts was, "What do people come to you for? What are you good at?" And that's one of the things that I would totally agree with you on. I find that I am a big encourager of people's dreams, and so much [00:24:00] so that ~it,~ it is a testament to how hard it is for many people to, like, really dream big.
Lee Gray: Mm-hmm. I always tell people I'll, I'll work with you through your dreams until you believe them.
Audra Dinell: Mm, yeah.
Lee Gray: You know, because a- all of my clients are in that wavering, is this dream real? Can I do it? Is this dream real? Can I do it? It, it, it doesn't just happen overnight. ~ It's a,~ it's a fluid thing, and then the dream grows.
I remember when I set my dream goals, it was to work with 15 clients a month. Isn't that funny today to even think that was a big dream? And I, all the things that I wrote~ in my,~ in my coach's training, 10 days of training in Las Vegas, 12-hour days, all of those dreams became true within, like, six months.
Audra Dinell: Wow.
Lee Gray: Right? And, 'cause I didn't know how to dream any bigger. I do now.
Audra Dinell: Yeah.
Lee Gray: You know? Yeah. Um, but so we're just programmed, and we have to fight it. We have to fight that programming.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. Oh, I love that.
Stop Buying a Job
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Audra Dinell: So Lee, when those business owners do go [00:25:00] into business for themselves but then end up creating themselves a job and a business that's not sellable-
Why do you think that happens, and what can they do to avoid that?
Lee Gray: ~W-~ it's a good question, and it goes back to the question you asked about muscle earlier. Building the muscle to do something different doesn't just happen with one repetition, right? So repeat, repeat, repeat. L- look at your schedule. What can I do?
What can I delegate? What do I need to stop doing early on? And I think that, ~ um, the,~ the other biggest mistake that people, we make~ in bus-~ as businesses is wanna do it ourselves 'cause we are good at it. And a good rule of thumb is, unless you're a neurosurgeon, and even then, it's okay to make a mistake because you've got an assistant, you know, physician in the room with you.
No one's gonna let this, a terrible thing happen.~ It, it ~... we're all looking at the patient together, and that's how the business is. Or ~you're,~ you're not gonna do something that's, that's stupid necessarily. And if so, it's no big deal. You'll ~you'll get~ over it. You'll figure it out. You'll pivot. [00:26:00] So business owners think, "I'm the only one that could do it," but the truth is, if someone can do it 80%, that's plenty.
That's good enough. That's the Pareto principle. Everything works on that rule, 80/20, 80/20. When business owners begin to think, "Okay, ~I- I'll, I'll, I'll, ~I'll buy that. ~I will only w- work on my business 80% of the time, and 20% of the time I'm gonna work ... ~I'm gonna work in my business 80% and then 20% on my business," they buy into that first and realize that all of that thinking time that goes into the, that 20% is impacting the 80% till it's finally switched over, and 80% of the time is thinking time, strategic thinking time, and 20% is doing.
When we don't let go of the doing, we're constantly going to be doing, and ~so that's,~ that's probably the number one thing. ~Uh,~ the biggest mistake I made in my coaching business was not to hire my assistant, my first assistant. I should have hired, and I had an operating budget to start my business. It was a while before I had a clientele.
It would've been worth it for me to put in a year's salary, invested it into that person so that I coulda had [00:27:00] 20% strategic time, and I would've probably gotten where I am now m- probably 50, 60% quicker.
Audra Dinell: Wow.
Lee Gray: Mm-hmm.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. Mm-hmm. If you would've just-
Lee Gray: Just- ...
Audra Dinell: invested.
Lee Gray: Mm-hmm. Yep.
Audra Dinell: Mm-hmm. Yeah, not tried to do it all-
Lee Gray: Exactly
on
Audra Dinell: your own.
Lee Gray: Mm-hmm.
Make It Public
---
Audra Dinell: Okay, Lee, so for our listeners, as we wrap up our conversation, for those who are considering business ownership as a part of their second act, or those business owners who are ready to go all in and scale their business as their second act, what's one last piece of advice you'd give them?
Lee Gray: You know, one last piece of advice you might think is for me to say, "See an attorney, see an accountant," and those are all great things, but the first piece of advice is to tell the world and make it public.
Audra Dinell: Mm. "
Lee Gray: This is what I'm gonna do. I'm starting my second act. I'm gonna be doing this, this, and this. I'm looking for support from all my friends and the people who know I'm gonna be successful, and I'm looking forward to an amazing journey."
Tell the world, 'cause the world listens and gives you back what you tell it.
Audra Dinell: Yeah. I love, [00:28:00] love that piece of advice- Yes. Mm-hmm ... and just find so much power in it. Mm-hmm. There's so much fear that you've overcome-
Lee Gray: Yeah ...
Audra Dinell: to get to the point where you hit publish or send or post, but it's shooting your shot.
Lee Gray: It is.
~Take, take action.~ Nothing is gonna happen without action, so take the action to do the next thing, the next thing, ~and,~ and tell the world, and we'll, we're listening. We are listening to your second act, and we wanna see you be successful.
Closing and Connect
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Audra Dinell: Mm. Lee, thank you for coming on today. You're very welcome, Audra. I loved our conversation, and ~our guests can, ~for our listeners who want to connect with Lee further, they can check out our show notes, and they'll find your website for your Action Coach business as well as your podcast, The Second Act Business Owner, and we'll look forward to seeing the publishing of your upcoming book.
[00:29:00]