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Ever feel like your health struggles are "all in your head"? It’s time to change the narrative.
Welcome to the supportive, straight talking "girls group chat" you’ve been waiting for. Hosted by Ellisha - your resident big sister, fellow struggler, and open book - this podcast is a safe space for young women navigating the complexities of health issues like PMDD, ADHD, and everything in between.
We know what it’s like to be chronically online but feel completely unheard. Whether you’re paralyzed by information overload, tired of doctors dismissing your pain, or fearing your symptoms are impacting your relationships and career, we’re here to cut through the noise.
What to expect each week:
Raw & Relatable Chat: No inaccessible celebrities here - just real stories from "normal" women going through the exact same thing.
The Hormone Hotline: We dive into your anonymous listener dilemmas from across the web to provide actionable advice and support.
Self-Advocacy Tools: We move from feeling silenced to feeling empowered, equipping you with the confidence to advocate for your physical and mental health.
Stop the chronic comparison and start healing. It’s time to move from overwhelmed to equipped.
Hit follow and join the chat. You aren't falling behind, and you certainly aren't alone.
V1 TRANSCRIPTION
EH - Ep 01 - Michelle Griffith
[00:00:13:03 - 00:00:57:17]
Host:
Welcome to the Hormonal Hotline Podcast with me, Alicia Blake. The podcast where we talk about all the things that would usually stay in a group chat, but there are no boundaries here. We're having raw, honest and open conversations. And I want to thank you so much for being here. Let's get to it. Today we have a guest that I've been really excited to have on. Ever since I met her, you know, when you see someone and there's like a sparkle of energy in a room and like you're just drawn to them. This is that person. So today I have an Olympian, a coach, a mentor, a women's advocate, a charity ambassador, and most importantly, a mother, Michelle Griffith Robinson.
[00:00:58:17 - 00:00:59:19]
Host:
Thank you for having me darling.
[00:00:59:19 - 00:01:06:00]
Michelle:
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You're still as beautiful as the last time I saw you, sweetie. Give me some loving. Give me some loving. Boom. We got you.
[00:01:06:00 - 00:01:14:23]
Host:
I'm honestly so happy to have you here. Like even with everything you've achieved in your life, just as a person, every time I talk to you, I feel like I'm, I leave one little bit wiser.
[00:01:14:23 - 00:01:16:08]
Michelle:
Oh baby. Thank you.
[00:01:16:08 - 00:01:23:01]
Host:
One little bit wiser. So let's get into it. How would you, how would you describe what you do and who you are?
[00:01:23:01 - 00:01:49:00]
Michelle:
Oh gosh. Do you know what? Someone asked me this the other day. How would I describe who I am? I am a, first importantly, I showed most importantly, I'm a mother. A mother of three amazing children. Um, I come from Wembley. My background was sport. And when I retired from sport, I wanted to reinvent myself to be even more than just an Olympian. Yes, I am an Olympian. The first ever woman to jump over 14 metres of the triple jump.
[00:01:49:00 - 00:01:50:12]
Host:
Slay queen, honestly.
[00:01:50:12 - 00:02:26:06]
Michelle:
Um, but that's, um, and I think people often have to remember when your day comes that you pass and you close your eyes, how do you want to be remembered? I want to be remembered as the woman that did her very best by people, leveraged those women, leveraged others, and gave one more piece of advice to help one person. And that's it. Simply that's it. So when people say, what do you do? I'm an Olympian. I'm a life coach, mother of three. I work for four amazing charities, um, women's aid, diabetes, UK, patron for menopause mandate, and I sit on the board for mental health UK. I'm busy. You're busy.
[00:02:26:06 - 00:02:29:14]
Host:
Do you not ever sit back and think, I'm smashing this?
[00:02:29:14 - 00:02:43:16]
Michelle:
I do. Good. I do. And I want people to sometimes really sit down and reflect and pause on what they've achieved and what they're doing. Because I think sometimes the world just goes past, stop and think, actually, I'm proud of me. And I am proud of me.
[00:02:43:16 - 00:03:06:23]
Host:
I love that. I love that. And I also think when I look at any mothers in general, but when I look at anyone that's like a little bit older and you're only a little bit older, much older, baby don't brother pretend, but I always think mum's just go and go and go and go and go. And I think it's so important, even just as a mother to sit back and be like, I created these people like I've smashed it.
[00:03:06:23 - 00:03:12:08]
Michelle:
Yeah. I think mothers do keep going and going and going, but I think women.
[00:03:13:17 - 00:03:26:10]
Michelle:
So even those that don't have children keep going and going and going. So we're always trying to do the next best thing. We're always trying, want to be better ourselves. And there's a lot of competition out there from ourselves, let alone anybody else.
[00:03:26:10 - 00:03:40:13]
Host:
No, I agree. No, I so agree. And we are our own worst enemies as well. Yeah, absolutely. Inocritic, all of those things. How would you say, how have you got through life with that inocritic? How do you, you know, tell her to,
[00:03:40:13 - 00:04:02:18]
Michelle:
I think it's become more apparent that I know how to quiet, quiet that voice, that negative voice as I've got older. Yeah. I'm 54 now. So I know how to manage myself and navigate those conversations. Yeah. But when I was younger, it had its impact on me. You know, I was in abusive relationships because of lack of confidence.
[00:04:03:20 - 00:04:04:23]
Michelle:
But now I'm older.
[00:04:06:02 - 00:04:23:12]
Michelle:
I know how to manage those negative situations and that's a walk away from situations. I know how to circumnavigate situations. And I guess for people listening, it's about knowing what you can do and what you can impact and how you can impact and having the confidence to say sometimes walking away is your best option.
[00:04:23:12 - 00:04:25:18]
Host:
I need that right now.
[00:04:26:19 - 00:04:33:05]
Host:
That's incredible. Yeah. It's so true. And people don't realize the power. What comes after that when you make that brave choice?
[00:04:33:05 - 00:04:42:03]
Michelle:
When you make that brave choice. And I think that's a lovely way to put, to look at it and put it when you make that brave choice to walk away, which is scary, which is sometimes dark.
[00:04:43:05 - 00:05:13:10]
Michelle:
And you don't know where you're walking to, but all you got is that little torch, maybe on your phone, a little light ahead of you. And you got to follow that. And that is your gut. And that light gets brighter. It gets absolutely brighter. I need to hear this today. It absolutely gets brighter. It gets brighter, Alicia. And also as well, knowing that everything happens because it's meant to happen that way. And what's meant for you will not pass you. My mama told me that. Honestly. My mama told me that what's for you will not pass you by. Yeah.
[00:05:13:10 - 00:05:45:12]
Host:
Yeah. And what's meant for you will give you clarity, not chaos. Boom, baby. We're smashing it today. Should we just give up now? Hey, close it off. Right. Let's start. I really want to start on your journey and your early journey and kind of where did it all begin? Obviously you ended up in the Olympics, which is wild, which doesn't just happen overnight. Also breaking records doesn't just happen overnight. It looks like it does because we don't see any of the work that happens behind the scenes, behind the scenes. We just think, Oh, you know, they're just gifted.
[00:05:45:12 - 00:05:46:11]
Michelle:
Just rocking up.
[00:05:46:11 - 00:05:49:09]
Host:
Yeah. Where did your journey start?
[00:05:49:09 - 00:05:51:10]
Michelle:
So my journey started in Wembley,
[00:05:53:05 - 00:05:55:08]
Michelle:
probably about 15 minutes from Wembley Stadium.
[00:05:56:14 - 00:06:09:10]
Michelle:
I grew up in a Caribbean family. My mother is Jamaican. My father was from Barbados. I went to the local track. I was long legged, big busted, big Afro hair, big feet, and could run and jump.
[00:06:10:12 - 00:06:19:13]
Michelle:
12 years old. My mum says even today is the best pound she's ever invested in her life. And that was where I was really realized I had an ability,
[00:06:20:14 - 00:06:29:13]
Michelle:
but I loved being active. I was the youngest of four, three older brothers. I had to keep up with them. I had to keep running and jumping just to hang out with them.
[00:06:31:01 - 00:06:56:20]
Michelle:
And I think that's an important thing with people that I listen to today, mothers who've got small children, keeping them active is really crucial. And I always say a tired puppy can't get up to mischief. So, you know, having three children myself, sport is an integral part of my genetics and my makeup. And sport has afforded me a hell of a lot of life lessons that I use today in everyday life.
[00:06:56:20 - 00:07:08:02]
Host:
Wow. That's incredible. And so you grew up in Wembley. When did the shift start to happen in terms of when did you think, wow, this is something that I could really do. I can turn this into a career.
[00:07:08:02 - 00:07:14:09]
Michelle:
I think I was 15 and my PE teacher said to me, you're quite good at this long jump. I was a long jumper.
[00:07:15:14 - 00:07:30:01]
Michelle:
By 19, I started the triple jumpers at Crystal Palace in South London. Someone had asked my coach at the time Crystal Palace. And I took up the triple jump is a Sunday morning. I broke the British record in my trainers. There's a lot of mayhem. A lot of people say, Oh my gosh, she's so talented.
[00:07:31:02 - 00:07:37:01]
Michelle:
And from then, and four years later, I was walking into the Olympic stadium in Atlanta,
[00:07:38:10 - 00:08:58:17]
Michelle:
representing Great Britain and Northern Ireland in the women's triple jump, which is the fact that actual first ever Olympics for women triple jump was then. Wow. So it's about harnessing your talents and your strengths. And that's in anything, not just in sport, in music, in drama, in creativity, in academia. If it's something that brings you joy, harness it, explore where it could take you. Cause you never know where it will take you. And I'll be lying to our listeners if I said that when I stepped on the track, the cinder track in Wembley, that I thought I was going to become an Olympian. No, I did not. It was just a past time. It was a hobby. But what I did know is by three years later, I thought, my God, I'm better than the boys in my school. I'm the best in my district. I'm going to go on and represent my school at English schools. And just from then that joy it bought me and don't get me wrong. It's not always plain sailing. And you alluded to it that you only see when people are on the TV in the final or getting disqualified or doing no jumps. You don't see the hard graph that goes behind that. And that's the same in any sport. You know, you don't see like an even, even in a TV program, you don't see the hours and hours of rehearsals. You don't see the prep. And it's, it's been an amazing journey. And I feel very blessed and grateful that I have the talent and that I utilised it.
[00:08:58:17 - 00:09:17:09]
Host:
Yeah, that's incredible. And talking of prep and process, what was it like in general, a being a woman having to deal with, you know, periods and cycles going through all of this training, but also being a black woman as well. And the representation back then wasn't as wasn't what
[00:09:17:09 - 00:09:40:10]
Michelle:
it is now. No, it definitely wasn't what it is now. And then that even the knowledge on periods, you know, I'm having this conversation my two girls who are fantastic athletes, my eldest daughter, Reese is a triple jumper. And just recently she broke the Welsh national record for triple jump. And my middle daughter or second daughter, I should say Eden is a heptathlete. And they've done a lot around the research behind periods and how impact the performance is.
[00:09:40:10 - 00:09:41:07]
Host:
God, we should get them on the podcast.
[00:09:41:07 - 00:10:47:21]
Michelle:
Absolutely, you should. And I said to my girls, you know, I would be competing and having two tampons up me because I was scared to flood through my my knicker shorts. If I was on my period, I'd be having knicker shorts and cycling shorts and period pants. And there was no period pants pants back then. There was no period pants back in the 90s. That's for sure. All 2000s, early 2000s. So it's about navigating those things. But that comes with a little bit of pressure and oh my gosh, you know, suppose I leak out or you know, feeling self-conscious, even down to sports bras as well, you know, have I had I've always been very well, well endowed and having my boobs just bouncing all over the place. Whereas now you've got it wasn't so much pain, it was just it was an it was a distraction and obstruction. Whereas there's so much more around, you know, how these things impact women, you know, periods, cycles, there's so much more around it now. So I think that's a positive thing for, you know, 21st century that we're having these conversations, girls are more more willing to discuss these things. Yeah. And they know all about the different the different phases of this cycle as well, which I never knew. I just used to go, go through it.
[00:10:47:21 - 00:10:51:20]
Host:
Which is crazy because you're training as an athlete, as an Olympian,
[00:10:51:20 - 00:10:53:07]
Michelle:
as a professional athlete.
[00:10:53:07 - 00:10:57:09]
Host:
And you don't even know, oh, hey, I'm in my follicular phase. Everything's going to be working well next week.
[00:10:57:09 - 00:11:10:16]
Michelle:
Honestly, none of that came. And I'm embarrassed to say it. I never knew about any of these words, luteal, follicular, any of those, those, those actual phases and phrases about 10 years ago is the first time I heard them.
[00:11:10:16 - 00:11:14:13]
Host:
Yeah. Yeah. I was about, yeah, two years ago, but I suppose I'm a lot younger than you.
[00:11:14:13 - 00:11:19:08]
Michelle:
Excuse me, you said you weren't a lot. Now we're going to a lot now. Guys, I might have to walk out of this place now.
[00:11:20:19 - 00:11:36:19]
Host:
I mean, that is wild. And I think the education and the, well, the lack of education, especially in your day, women were just, and people with periods were just expected to get on with it. But people that are actually using their bodies for work and for sport, like
[00:11:36:19 - 00:12:15:02]
Michelle:
the fact that you, high performance. Yeah. Is that's what you've got to call it. We were not just doing it just to go out for like a social park run. This is high performance where people have invested money in us. You know, we were sponsored by national lottery back then. And now it's postcode lottery as well. So, you know, there's a lot of investment that's put into you. And yet you have to go out and high perform with a really heavy cycle or really struggling with lower backache, you know, or sore boobs. These things, you know, I'm glad. And I say it with that my girls have managed and will manage to benefit even more because there's so much more science back in, you know, performances out there now.
[00:12:15:02 - 00:12:19:04]
Host:
Yeah. And you think there is more support in terms of coaches and education,
[00:12:19:04 - 00:12:49:15]
Michelle:
coaches, education, you know, male coaches are a lot more understanding as well. You know, it's not just your female coaches. They understand. And you know, my daughter's got, she's in at the University of Florida and she's got male and female coaches that she can turn around and be free and say, look, I'm, I'm doing my cycle and they might adapt the training to suit them. So that's why it's so important to talk around hormones, educate the coaches, the teachers that, you know, the educators out there so that they can now support the younger girls coming through and younger women.
[00:12:49:15 - 00:12:54:11]
Host:
Did you feel a lot of shame in your period being like a high performance athlete?
[00:12:55:13 - 00:13:11:22]
Michelle:
I've got to be honest with you now, we didn't feel any shame. We just, you literally got on with it. That was the least of it. You know, you had agents that would just turn. So you've got to perform and they weren't really interested in whether you're on your cycle, whether you're bleeding heavy or you've got lower back ache. They're like bums on seats. That was off you go.
[00:13:13:06 - 00:13:15:10]
Michelle:
Did you
[00:13:15:10 - 00:13:18:15]
Host:
suffer emotionally as well or not really?
[00:13:18:15 - 00:14:33:02]
Michelle:
I've got to be honest. I was, I was probably, um, I was always on the pill. And again, it's that, that education around that I had to go on the pill to, to stop my cycles, you know, mid flow. I didn't want to be on my, my, on, on a, on a heavy period at the Olympic games or world championships or Commonwealth games. So I would use the pill to almost help facilitate me not being on that cycle. Right. Um, so I had that little bit of knowledge with that. Um, was I emotional? No, I wasn't really emotional. I wasn't, but whereas my middle daughter was, I keep saying middle, like I've got three, what two girls and a son, my youngest daughter has really suffered, um, with her menstrual cycle significantly. So she's actually on an antioxidant diet that has worked for, for the last 18 months and been a game changer. She'd be off school riddled in pain. And I've had to reach out to people like Dr. Aziza Sisei, Dr. Nagat, Araf, and, you know, to ask them for support on how did I manage this? You know, how can she manage this situation once we high performance athlete. And they've given us some fantastic information and UK athletics have been exceptionally supportive of Eden antioxidant diet that has been a game changer for her. So if anybody listening, you know, whose child or daughters is suffering with really severe, heavy cycles, maybe look at the antioxidant diet and see how that can impact them.
[00:14:33:02 - 00:14:43:08]
Host:
Same with like the anti-inflammatory diet. I don't know if you know, Sophie Richards, who's had endometriosis for years has managed to completely living like this anti-inflammatory lifestyle.
[00:14:43:08 - 00:14:44:05]
Michelle:
Reverse.
[00:14:44:05 - 00:14:50:00]
Host:
Yeah. It makes them, Eden's reversed. But you know, when you go to the doctor, you often just shove the pill and that's it.
[00:14:50:00 - 00:15:41:14]
Michelle:
Like they tried that with Eden. We tried that whole cycle. And again, it's about advocating. And I'm so strong around women's health and advocating for yourself and for others, because again, you know, she walks in there, you know, as a as a 17 year old kid, you know, without not the support of her mum or whatever. She doesn't know what she they kind of just say, Oh, just go on the pill. And yeah, they don't understand. So it's good for me to go in there and say, right, this is you're not going to just do that. Because I've got the resources and the knowledge from other people around me to help and influence that, you know. And again, you know, we can't hide the fact that black women's health has been a big issue. You know, it's been a big issue where we've just been almost like, Oh, you're strong, you're a black woman, you're strong, you can deal with this, you don't your pain threshold. Yeah. So you've almost had to really fight for, you know, your, your to how you've been treated.
[00:15:41:14 - 00:15:48:06]
Host:
Yeah, exactly. I mean, I read a thing once it was in a documentary, like an endometriosis documentary
[00:15:49:13 - 00:15:59:22]
Host:
that I think people of colour take double the amount of time to get diagnosed, to get diagnosed for like endometriosis. And that is crazy.
[00:15:59:22 - 00:17:11:08]
Michelle:
Absolutely. And again, it's about calling out those, those, those behaviours and those stereotypes and those, those biases as well, you know, so all those factors, things are changing. It will take a long time, you won't get, we won't get equity. I'm not, and I'm the most positive person you'll ever meet, but we won't get equity. But what you will get is you might get a slight bit of a better result. There's going to be shifts. There's going to be shifts. And that's probably a more positive way to look at there will be shifts in the right direction. But the more you keep calling out, and hence why I'm an ambassador for all the charities, diabetes, mental health and menopause, because and women say because it's important for me to use my voice and my platform for justice, to speak up for those underrepresented groups that cannot use their voice. And when I say underrepresented, I do not just reference black women. I'm talking about the woman who's in up in Middlesbrough, you know, in the council state who doesn't have access to resources or menopause, menstruation or fertility. Yeah. Yeah. I'm talking about LGBTQ plus, I want to stand up for those people who are sometimes invisible. And it's really important to me to use my platform as an Olympian, a life coach, an enthusiast, a women's health advocate to stand up for those who can't.
[00:17:11:08 - 00:17:13:12]
Host:
Do you need an MBA? Have you got an MBA?
[00:17:13:12 - 00:17:18:14]
Michelle:
I haven't got an MBA, but I'm okay. I'm all right. I think you need one. I'm okay with that. You know what?
[00:17:19:23 - 00:17:42:14]
Michelle:
I know that and I said it to you at the top of the conversation when I put my head on that pillow, when I close my eyes, I'm doing my very best. Yeah. And I'm doing my best not just for me, but I'm doing it for my daughters, for my granddaughters, for their granddaughters. And for those around them that again, haven't got the knowledge, the resources and sometimes live in that ignorant bliss.
[00:17:42:14 - 00:18:09:01]
Host:
Yeah. Gosh, you know, some people just go about their lives doing nothing and you're doing all of these things. Like it's insane. Thank you. No, it's incredible. Like you, I see you as like a, I don't know, you're like an angel that just like glows. No, because it's not just a lot of people just talk and a lot of people have a platform and a lot of people, you know, it's all well and good making money on the internet, but actually to be able to work with charities, make change. Yeah.
[00:18:09:01 - 00:18:22:22]
Michelle:
It's important to me though. And these conversations. It's important to me. It's important to me. And but I do realise I do. And like I said, I do SPR, stop, pause and reflect on how well I do and what I'm doing. And I also know my capacity.
[00:18:22:22 - 00:18:25:11]
Host:
Yeah. You don't take it all on. You have boundaries.
[00:18:25:11 - 00:18:34:19]
Michelle:
Boundaries. I'm a coach. Yeah. I have to have boundaries around my energy and where I choose to give my energy and who I choose to align with as well.
[00:18:34:19 - 00:18:47:00]
Host:
That's why the fact she's here today, we are honoured. You're honoured to have her here quite honestly. Oh my goodness. Thank you. How do you think being an athlete has contributed towards your life in terms of your mindset?
[00:18:48:11 - 00:18:54:08]
Michelle:
So I think that being an athlete, a high performance athlete, an Olympian,
[00:18:55:23 - 00:18:59:02]
Michelle:
it's definitely impacted the way I look at life. My mindset is,
[00:19:00:03 - 00:19:07:20]
Michelle:
I now know I have the strength of character when things aren't going well to draw on what I did then.
[00:19:08:20 - 00:20:05:21]
Michelle:
So when I was told no, when I was told you can't make a team or you haven't made a team, I know how to bounce back. We hear the word resilience bounced around a lot. I know actually what that looks like. And I know there's times where it's been, I've trained, I've competed, I've done my very best and I haven't made a final. And from not making that final, there's consequences. Subsequently, my funding was dropped. I know what it takes to be creative in that situation. So that didn't work out, but what's next? Yeah. And that's where I can use my Olympic mindset. I know how to switch things on. I know when I've gone to a run-up and I've done two no jumps and you only get three jumps and you need to get a valid jump in to proceed to the next round. I know how to draw on those resources. Calm, stay calm, stay focused. What's next? What can you impact? How can you impact? What do you need to do next?
[00:20:05:21 - 00:20:09:19]
Host:
And would you say that's how you pretty much navigate every thing that comes your way?
[00:20:09:19 - 00:20:18:00]
Michelle:
Not everything. Sometimes I listen, guys, let's not pretend here. Sometimes I'm like a bloody mess. I'm like, what the hell am I doing?
[00:20:19:18 - 00:20:26:20]
Michelle:
Get yourself together. You have to give yourself a telling off. I have to give myself a proper talking tool. A Jamaican talking tool in the mirror.
[00:20:27:21 - 00:21:00:23]
Michelle:
And then other days, 80% of the time I'm like, come on, Misha, you got this. And I'll say to everybody, we are all human. There's going to be times where we will feel like, you know, we can't be bothered. And that's normal. And that actually sometimes coincides with hormonal impacts as well. You're feeling low, can't be bothered. You know, lethargic. I had one of those weeks last week where I was like, Oh my God, I'm so drained. I feel like didn't feel great, spotty, didn't feel bloated. Happened a couple of days. Soon after that I'm back in the gym training. She's back on it.
[00:21:00:23 - 00:21:09:21]
Host:
She's back on it. MGI in the house. Which actually I want to talk about your morning routine and your training. Like as, are you going through the menopause yet?
[00:21:09:21 - 00:22:02:03]
Michelle:
So I don't know where I am, Alicia. I'm going to be very honest with you. I'm still paying menopausal. Okay. And I'm 54 years old and I'm still having 29 day cycles. Right. Which is quite unusual. Yeah. Apparently, you know, I'm on HRT. I'm not on the coil. I take progesterone, estrogen, testosterone, and anything else that makes me feel flipping brilliant. And have they helped? And they've helped. I feel absolutely, formidably brilliant. Oh, I love that. Listen, I feel good. Good. I'm having sex a lot. My husband's smiling. He's gorgeous by the way. He is bloody hot. And, and you know, and when I say to Matt, do you realize not every 54 year old woman's giving me that up. So wanting the, he looks at me like, here we go again. Here she is again. But I'm letting him know this is not the reality for a lot of couples.
[00:22:02:03 - 00:22:03:03]
Host:
Not. And he's been together what?
[00:22:03:03 - 00:22:41:11]
Michelle:
24 years. 24 years we've been together. You're listening. Good. Good comprehension leash. And it's not the norm in a lot of, in a lot of respects, because we still love each other, still fancy each other. Of course he still gets on my nose. I still get on his nose. Let's not pretend there, but there's a real big union and unity there. And part of that is I'm hormonally sound. Wow. I am. I feel good. I take care of myself. I watch what I eat. I am prediabetic, which basically means that my, I fluctuate between, there's a, there's a figure between 42 and 47 is pre-diabetes. And I fluctuate between those.
[00:22:41:11 - 00:22:45:09]
Host:
I was pre-diabetic as well. And they said that's probably from my mum's side.
[00:22:45:09 - 00:22:47:22]
Michelle:
It's your mum's side. Yeah. It's the black in your bag. Sorry.
[00:22:49:03 - 00:22:50:09]
Michelle:
You've got some positive stuff.
[00:22:50:09 - 00:22:52:11]
Host:
For those of you that don't know, I'm corteganian.
[00:22:52:11 - 00:22:58:17]
Michelle:
So you're corteganian. That's why she's got the look, you know, want a little bit of black. She's black. Yeah.
[00:22:58:17 - 00:23:02:12]
Host:
But no, I was pre-diabetic and they were like, yeah, I think that's from your black side.
[00:23:02:12 - 00:23:06:01]
Michelle:
It would be, no, no, it would be because culturally, again, for our listeners out there,
[00:23:07:07 - 00:23:18:03]
Michelle:
we are more predisposed to diabetes, interesting cholesterol, high blood pressure coming from ethnic minorities and communities. And actually mines are stabilised a lot more since I've been on HRT.
[00:23:18:03 - 00:23:34:10]
Host:
Interesting. And obviously you're saying now that you're, you know, stabilised, feeling good, all these things. I also love this because in everyone's heads, they're like, oh, you get married and you know, you have years of this and then you have kids, then sex goes out the window and you just remain best friends.
[00:23:34:10 - 00:23:36:04]
Michelle:
Best friends, no. There's no best friends in it. No, no, no, no, no. I love this energy.
[00:23:36:04 - 00:23:38:10]
Host:
I need to manifest this. This is what I want.
[00:23:38:10 - 00:23:39:04]
Michelle:
Manifest this, baby.
[00:23:40:11 - 00:24:03:05]
Michelle:
And also as well, I think it's part of it is you've got to feel good about yourself. Yeah. Before you can present yourself to anybody else, you've got to feel good about yourself. And that is, you know, my boobs aren't per like they were when I was in my 20s or 30s. My stomach's not as ripped or six packed as I was in my 30s. But you know what? I'm more confident now in my 50s than I was back then.
[00:24:03:05 - 00:24:07:13]
Host:
Oh, that's amazing. That's amazing. And it's because you're always continuously working on yourself,
[00:24:07:13 - 00:24:19:08]
Michelle:
physically, emotionally, physically and emotionally working on yourself. I think that's the key thing here. Feeding the soul. Feeding your soul and realising if something's not serving you, let it go. Go!
[00:24:20:08 - 00:24:21:13]
Host:
Oh, I needed this today.
[00:24:22:17 - 00:24:38:20]
Host:
Oh, amazing. Well, you've basically already answered the question I was going to ask next about how have you felt, you know, post retirement about your body and your hormones. Obviously, you're saying everything's kind of good in the hormonal department, but did you have a point where everything was all over the place?
[00:24:38:20 - 00:24:44:02]
Michelle:
Absolutely. I had a point where my hormones were all over the place and that was probably 2018.
[00:24:45:14 - 00:25:16:20]
Michelle:
Eight years ago, I presented with a lot of bleeding, haphazard bleeding, sporadic bleeding, dark coloured bleeding and I didn't know what was going on. And I was weighing a lot as well. So I walk into the GP centre. I'm in Lycra and I'm probably about a size, a healthy size 12. And my doctor says to me, "Well, you're not diabetic anyway. You're not diabetic. So we'll just test for some more things." And it came back that actually I was pre-diabetic.
[00:25:18:09 - 00:25:24:10]
Michelle:
And that's the first time I then started to explore, "Hold on. I'm not really wanting sex with Matthew much.
[00:25:25:10 - 00:25:55:10]
Michelle:
I couldn't stand him breathing next to me this and shut this man up before I suffocated. I'm like, "Can't do that. I'm a women's aid ambassador. I can't do that." And it was about exploring, you know, look, Matt was saying to me, "Is everything all right?" And I actually did our first tabloid spread all around menopause. It was about where's my wife gone? Because actually he didn't know what had happened to me and I didn't know what happened to me. If you do, you know, a lot of exploring around this subject, there's a lot of women that actually lose themselves.
[00:25:55:10 - 00:25:55:20]
Host:
Yeah.
[00:25:55:20 - 00:26:01:20]
Michelle:
And I'm sure the divorce rate around that point is... It is huge. Between 45 and 55 is the biggest divorce rate.
[00:26:03:18 - 00:26:08:16]
Michelle:
And it is, because women are hormonally deficient,
[00:26:10:02 - 00:26:17:10]
Michelle:
they have found the strength to let go of somebody that they think, "Actually, I don't want to spend the rest of my life with him or her."
[00:26:18:16 - 00:26:39:17]
Michelle:
Also as well, your children have, if you have children, they've grown up so you don't feel like the need to keep that family unit together as much. And that is really strongly pushed by hormones. And I remember doing a podcast not too long ago last year, and it was a phoning and a woman rang in and said, "You know, Michelle, my hormones are all over the place. I feel like I want to leave my husband."
[00:26:41:02 - 00:27:47:08]
Michelle:
My advice to her, I said, "Look, I'm not an agony aunt. I'm a life coach and a mentor. I'm not a counselor. I'm not a therapist." But she said, "What would you do in that situation?" I said, "I would wait until your hormones are stabilized before you make any big decisions." Yes. Because I think sometimes it's driven a lot by your hormonal active just going up and down and the chaos. And it can be very hard for a lot of women. One of my best friends really struggled with her menopause symptoms unbelievably, really dark times. So we can't dismiss the fact that sometimes this is a real life situation. Hence why, and I reiterate why I do so much around representation. I'm not going to be like my mum, that black woman in the kitchen saying, "It's just a hot sweat." No, that is not my gig. No. It's not my gig. I need to be able to. And again, I'm not discrediting my mummy. My mummy was a ward sister. She was a very intelligent woman, but again, she was conditioned that it's just a hot sweat. Get on with it. I'm not prepared to do any of that jester. There's no just going on here.
[00:27:47:08 - 00:27:50:17]
Host:
No. And would you say that's worse in the black community?
[00:27:50:17 - 00:28:33:19]
Michelle:
Yeah. I would say it's definitely worse in the black community and Asian community because expectations are, just get on with it. There's a lot of stigma around when you talk around menopause, it means that your fertility is lowering. And actually for a lot of cultures, it's more attractive. If you're a big buxom woman with big bodies that can are childbearing, that's the reality in a lot of cultures. So when you talk about, "Oh, I can no longer produce," or blah, blah, blah, blah, you're kind of looked on a bit like, "Really? I'm not sure if you're serving me anymore." So that's probably why a lot of women go through it hidden because they don't want that. The shame. The shame. It's the shame.
[00:28:33:19 - 00:28:40:14]
Host:
Yeah. Yeah. And I'm guessing you've done a lot of work on shame and trying to absolutely- Yeah.
[00:28:40:14 - 00:29:02:10]
Michelle:
Yeah. I never felt shame with my hormones. I was almost the opposite. I was the one that was willing to talk about it. Yeah. But of course, the shame has come in a different way, different waves of your life. Yeah. One of the things that I was embarrassed to talk about, and it's important for me to again, raise awareness was I was in two abusive relationships when I was younger,
[00:29:04:09 - 00:29:32:18]
Michelle:
mentally, physically, and coercively abused. And that comes with a lot of shame why you don't talk about it. It's because you don't want people thinking, "Well, she's the face of Nike. She can't be in an abusive relationship." She can't be weak. She can't be weak. And there's that in itself. So I now speak up. Of course, I would never tell everything because that's my business and my private life, but I would let people know that even those that you feel or you perceive as strong can sometimes be in really difficult situations.
[00:29:32:18 - 00:29:45:19]
Host:
And what advice if you could give advice to people that are in those situations that feel like, "I need to look strong, but I don't feel strong because I'm in a situation that is compromising my mental health, emotionally, physically."
[00:29:46:19 - 00:29:49:02]
Host:
What advice would you give to someone that's going through that?
[00:29:49:02 - 00:30:43:15]
Michelle:
That's an amazing question, Alicia. And I think the first thing I would say to is to speak to somebody, find a confidant to speak to, put it on paper of the patterns of this person's behavior. So because sometimes when you're in those situations, the first person you're going to blame is yourself. Yes. So and you're going to start to discredit yourself by saying, "Oh, it's because I was. Oh, it's because I just." You're trying to almost justify the person's behavior. Whereas if you write it down and you go back and look at it over a period of time, you think, "Actually, this isn't just me. This isn't me just convoluting or making up or this is actually happening to me and it's not right." So reach out for support. There's a lot of support out there. Get rid of the shame and find that one or two people that you can speak to and be honest and open with. Vulnerability is strength, not a weakness.
[00:30:43:15 - 00:31:09:14]
Host:
No. And we will definitely leave some support in the show notes of this episode for anyone that's being affected or has been affected, just if you ever need to reach out to anybody. I so agree with you and I think we as women live kind of riddled in shame and guilt and we feel this way for so much of our lives. And I think a lot of us see our periods and stuff like that as a weakness and we don't need to feel that way.
[00:31:09:14 - 00:32:12:23]
Michelle:
Absolutely we don't. We are more liberated more than ever when we're talking about our periods, our vaginas, our vulvas, our clitoris. We are more liberated with that and that all comes from educating from young. So you know from young, not just saying it's a foo-foo, it's your minky, no actually naming it, it belongs to you, you feel it, it's yours and you take ownership of that. And I think that's one thing that's really important and you put the barriers and the boundaries around how you want to be touched and when you want to be touched. I think if that's a lesson that I've taught my girls and my son, my husband teaches my son, is about their private parts belong to them. Yes. And you must find out and keep an eye on them. That's why it the reason why it's so important to be able to talk about these things openly, that way you get to see if something doesn't feel right. You know lumps, bumps, anything going on, unnatural bleeding, you know stomach aches that doesn't feel right. Get to know and appreciate your body.
[00:32:12:23 - 00:32:14:16]
Host:
Yeah education is key.
[00:32:14:16 - 00:32:31:17]
Michelle:
Education is key with no shame, with no shame because before it might be I don't want to tell my mum about that period that's lasted for 10 days and it could be something serious. Yeah of course. Yeah so get less, the less, the less shame, the more talking, the better result.
[00:32:31:17 - 00:32:49:21]
Host:
Yeah I so agree, I so agree. Going back a little bit, going back to obviously you mentioning you had some really rough relationships which sounds like it shaped you a lot. Yeah. How long after that horrific time did you meet your husband?
[00:32:49:21 - 00:32:51:07]
Michelle:
I want to know how you met.
[00:32:52:19 - 00:32:57:04]
Michelle:
It's an interesting one and it's a nice story.
[00:32:58:06 - 00:32:59:02]
Michelle:
So I was 30.
[00:32:59:02 - 00:33:12:08]
Host:
I have written down what happened to you at 30 because I'm 30 this year and I said, I said to you the other day about being 30 and you said ask me what happened at 30. Right. So what happened at 30 Michelle?
[00:33:12:08 - 00:33:50:07]
Michelle:
What happened at 30 was it was my 30th birthday party and I want you guys to really home into this conversation now. It's my 30th birthday party, I'm slamming, my body's banging, I'm an Olympic athlete, I'm slamming, dunking, 200 people coming to my party. Wow. From all over footballers, athletes, fit men, fit women, people ready to have a really good time. I've got my black lipsie dress hanging up and it's got little frills on it fitted, had my hairdresser come round, had my makeup artist come round, all fabulous. My boyfriend at the time says to me, are you wearing that dress?
[00:33:50:07 - 00:33:51:15]
Host:
Oh no, not one of them.
[00:33:51:15 - 00:34:37:02]
Michelle:
One of them and I say, yes I am. Yes I am. He says if you wear that, I'm not coming. To your own birthday? So he wasn't going to turn up to your 30th birthday if I wore that dress. Now come on now guys, it's my 30th birthday, come on. I'm going to my party looking Chris yeah, as you should. Absolutely. So I go to my 30th birthday party, he doesn't come but the part of the control which is important to realise here, what people do that are trying to control you, they'll do anything to sabotage your night or your day or how you feel. So I've gone out the door, he's not turned up to my party, everybody's asking something with this guy for years now, four or five years, where is he, where is he, where is he? I go to the DJ and say he's not coming.
[00:34:38:03 - 00:35:56:12]
Michelle:
Please tell everybody to stop asking Michelle about the party, about him, he's not coming. The DJ gets on the mic and says, just to let you guys know, so and so he's not coming to the party, please stop asking Michelle. I know. So that's taking back the control again, so I take back the control, fine no problem. That's crazy. The next day we have a flat together, we share a flat together, we bought a flat together. The next day I contact my financial advisor, I say look, I need this person out of this house and they say Michelle, I don't know if you're earning enough money from your track and field. I say make me earn enough money. This time it's a buy to let, so it's a little bit more easy to get mortgages approved than now. I get that mortgage approved, I give him 20 grand, he gets out of my flat, I still got my flat today. No way. 26 years later I have my flat slay. So what happens at 30 is a wake up call. My best friend says to me at the time, who I never really shared about how abusive he was, why are you going to leave him now? What's going to make this decision any different to what you've said before? And I say I'm ready now. That's what makes the decision different.
[00:35:56:12 - 00:35:57:12]
Host:
You have to be ready.
[00:35:57:12 - 00:36:05:12]
Michelle:
Nothing happens before it's time. Listeners write it down. Nothing happens before it's time.
[00:36:06:17 - 00:36:24:03]
Michelle:
When you are ready, you will make that decision and that's whether you're ready to deal with your hormones, deal with your broken relationship, dealing with childhood trauma, whether you're ready to start a diet, whether you're ready to start looking after yourself, nothing happens until you are ready.
[00:36:24:03 - 00:36:31:04]
Host:
I always see it like a cloth. You're already seeing it like a cloth. You get to the last drip and the drip drops. You're like, okay,
[00:36:31:04 - 00:36:34:21]
Michelle:
I'm done. Lights are out. I was ready. Lights are out. I'm in.
[00:36:36:02 - 00:36:40:23]
Michelle:
And that's when the turning point was. And I was 30. So I then, let's fast forward.
[00:36:42:02 - 00:37:19:09]
Michelle:
I was 13 in October. I go to the Commonwealth Games in 2002 in Manchester. I walk into this busy dining hall July the 28th. I see this beautiful black guy sitting there with this group of white guys, rugby players. I go up to this guy and I say, hi, my name's Michelle. He said, I saw you in the newspapers yesterday. I know who you are. I said, smiling. Oh my God. A bit cringy. I said, can I have your, after talking to him, a bit of small talk, can I have your number? He says, no, you can't, but I'll give, can I have yours? Because I'm in something at the moment. And when I'm out of that, I'll let you know.
[00:37:20:21 - 00:37:24:00]
Michelle:
Okay. Fair enough. I've never been rejected before. But hey, first time for everything.
[00:37:25:05 - 00:37:48:02]
Michelle:
And he takes three months to call me. Did you think about him? Once I thought he's fit, but fair enough, he's got someone. I went on holiday with another guy actually, who turned out to be gay. He was a really nice guy though. And we were friends for a long time afterwards. I went on holiday, went out with my girlfriends, which was on my own. And then Matt rings October the 31st, 2002.
[00:37:49:10 - 00:37:50:16]
Michelle:
And the rest is history.
[00:37:50:16 - 00:37:56:05]
Host:
Oh my goodness. That's stunning. And again, time, the timing wasn't right.
[00:37:56:05 - 00:38:14:12]
Michelle:
Timing wasn't right from Matthew's point of view. And I was grateful that, you know, he was honest at the time, literally three months later, we're pregnant with our first baby. Three months. Three months straight in baby. We knew, we knew, we knew. A year later we were married and yeah, good together 24 years.
[00:38:14:12 - 00:38:22:01]
Host:
That's incredible. What advice would you give for being able to maintain a long, long-term relationship of 24 years?
[00:38:22:01 - 00:38:28:09]
Michelle:
I would say growth. Growth happens when you step out of unfamiliar territory.
[00:38:29:19 - 00:38:34:04]
Michelle:
And I needed to grow. I needed to let go of things that happened in my past.
[00:38:36:03 - 00:38:37:01]
Michelle:
He needed to be ready.
[00:38:38:19 - 00:38:45:15]
Michelle:
And I think time you realize that the grass isn't always greener.
[00:38:46:18 - 00:38:49:16]
Michelle:
Investing in yourself. I went to therapy for two and a half years.
[00:38:51:02 - 00:39:04:18]
Michelle:
That was my investment in me. And I remember someone saying to me, "You spent a lot of money on therapy." I said, "Yeah, 45 pounds every week, every Thursday with a lady called Anna."
[00:39:05:21 - 00:39:14:03]
Michelle:
And it worked out to about 5,645 pounds. I said, "But divorce is about 50,000." So true. So true.
[00:39:14:03 - 00:39:15:17]
Host:
Have you ever been to couples therapy at all?
[00:39:15:17 - 00:39:21:04]
Michelle:
Twice. We've been twice. Couples therapy twice. Matt didn't really like it. He's been to therapy by himself though.
[00:39:22:12 - 00:39:35:16]
Michelle:
But I think the accountability starts with yourselves. And it's not always been easy. There's been times where you know when Matthew's lost his mother in 2009, that challenged our relationship then because he lost his best friend, which is understandable.
[00:39:37:17 - 00:40:23:08]
Michelle:
But also, and it's only probably two years ago that he apologized for the way he behaved at the time because he literally, he lost his mum. Within three, four months of that, he said, "I'm changing jobs. I'm giving up my career." Matthew was a sports scientist, a biomechanist for UK athletics, working with Olympians. He gave it all up to become a PE teacher to start at the very bottom. He said, "I've done with this life, being away from you and my girls. We only had two children then." So then he just, he came with this proposal that I had to agree with. And I actually didn't really want to agree with it, but it was, "I'm moving. We're going." So we moved out of London. We had this beautiful house that we lived in, Bushe. We bought a small house in Canterbury and he said, "Just bear with me for three years and I promise you we'll get us back on track." And my husband did get us back on track.
[00:40:24:09 - 00:40:32:16]
Michelle:
And he did say to me two years ago, he apologized because he said he didn't give me a fair enough chance to have a decision in moving to Canterbury.
[00:40:33:17 - 00:40:46:20]
Michelle:
He went and found the house and it was just whirlwind. I was like, "Oh my gosh, what do you mean? The kids were like two and five." Crazy time. Like just boom, off, gone. All my life was in London, but it's the best decision we've ever made.
[00:40:46:20 - 00:40:50:07]
Host:
Wow. It just feels like everything's fallen in place of your life.
[00:40:50:07 - 00:41:08:14]
Michelle:
It's fallen into place and not everything. And we can't say everything because I don't want to paint this picture to our listeners that everything has fallen into place. But you trusted. I've worked hard. I've trusted the process. Sometimes it hasn't worked out how it should have been. We've been in debt, financially been in debt, and then we've turned it around by making better choices.
[00:41:10:01 - 00:41:22:09]
Michelle:
And I would say when people look at me, they see this glamour girl who loves fashion, loves a dance, but also as well, I was the vulnerable young girl, the 10 year old kid on the stairs that was frightened.
[00:41:22:09 - 00:41:30:13]
Host:
Yeah. Yeah. And do you think often that like your hobby that became obviously your career, do you think that saved you?
[00:41:30:13 - 00:41:39:05]
Michelle:
Yes, it did. It did save me. Track and field and sport saved me. I grew up in a volatile background at home, and that was my safe space.
[00:41:39:05 - 00:41:40:00]
Host:
Wow.
[00:41:40:00 - 00:41:50:07]
Michelle:
So yes, it did. And that's why I say sport can afford you so much. Yeah. And I get to mix with people from all different avenues of life.
[00:41:51:10 - 00:42:10:20]
Michelle:
And but what I can do, the ability that I have is I can light up a room with anybody in it. You can. Whether you're from the council estate, nothing against anybody from the council estate, whether you're from whether you've got no home, whether you're homeless or whether you're rich and so-called famous, because I will always be authentically me.
[00:42:10:20 - 00:42:23:20]
Host:
Yeah. Amen to that. Wow. I love that about you. And I just think you can see it in people, right? I think and the older I get as well, not old, but every I look around and it's so obvious
[00:42:25:01 - 00:42:31:11]
Host:
when you see someone that is living their truth and being who they really are. And people that just aren't quite there yet and haven't
[00:42:31:11 - 00:42:35:10]
Michelle:
found and that's okay. That's okay. Because, you know, people get to it at different stages.
[00:42:35:10 - 00:42:47:12]
Host:
But when you see someone like you, it's so obvious. You know who you are. And you know what you want. You know what who you value, what you value, what you believe in. And I think that's just something that people need to think about more.
[00:42:47:12 - 00:43:12:17]
Michelle:
Absolutely. I think it's definitely it's a journey. And again, in midlife, you'll definitely start to look deeper and delve deeper into what you want and what you don't want, who you want in your life and who you don't want in your life, where you're going and where you're not going. Yeah. And now more than ever is a great time when you hit 50, man. You're like, boy, this is my best second act coming up.
[00:43:12:17 - 00:43:14:09]
Host:
Yeah. How do you feel about getting older?
[00:43:17:21 - 00:43:38:21]
Michelle:
Don't think about it. I think, do you know what? What it does make me think, and this is a sad story that makes me a little bit tearful. I lost my sister in law two years ago. She was 51. She died from something called the Addisonian crisis. She had no cortisol, no adrenaline. And she just died out of the blue. She was gone, gone, gone.
[00:43:41:11 - 00:43:45:08]
Michelle:
And from her death, it taught me.
[00:43:46:13 - 00:43:48:02]
Michelle:
You live your life.
[00:43:49:11 - 00:43:56:11]
Michelle:
There's no if buts, maybes, how, when, why. If you want to do something, what's stopping you? How are you going to get there?
[00:43:57:12 - 00:44:01:03]
Michelle:
Who's going to be responsible for that decision making? Hold yourself accountable.
[00:44:02:08 - 00:44:09:02]
Michelle:
And from that day with my sister in law, and I was always like that anyway, but even more so when pretty passed away.
[00:44:10:02 - 00:44:26:02]
Michelle:
The 20th of December, 2023 was life changing for me. And I've had a lot of losses. I lost my stepdad. My dad lost my stepdad to COVID, lost my dad. Mum had her leg amputated, but nothing has hit me like losing my sister in law. And that was a hormonal imbalance.
[00:44:27:02 - 00:44:29:05]
Host:
Wow. And could it have been stopped?
[00:44:30:05 - 00:44:30:15]
Michelle:
Potentially.
[00:44:30:15 - 00:44:32:04]
Host:
That's heartbreaking.
[00:44:32:04 - 00:44:36:22]
Michelle:
So something that we don't really delve too much into because we can't bring her back.
[00:44:36:22 - 00:44:37:14]
Host:
Yeah.
[00:44:38:14 - 00:44:44:02]
Michelle:
But what we do know is the lessons I've learned from Tiki, we call her affectionately we call her Tiki.
[00:44:45:03 - 00:44:46:08]
Michelle:
You live your life.
[00:44:47:08 - 00:44:49:22]
Michelle:
There's no second chances. There's none.
[00:44:51:00 - 00:45:01:02]
Michelle:
So if you need to go and explore what good looks like, go and explore what good looks like. Because you certainly know what bad looks like. And I about to live no bad.
[00:45:02:06 - 00:45:08:14]
Michelle:
Them days are done. Yeah. And who wants to come on that journey with me, get in that boat with me, come with me.
[00:45:08:14 - 00:45:09:15]
Host:
And the right ones will always stay.
[00:45:09:15 - 00:45:16:14]
Michelle:
Listen and those that won't, that's also no problem. Don't hold any bad mallet in your heart
[00:45:17:16 - 00:45:23:02]
Michelle:
for nobody. Just wave them on, say goodbye and pursue your course.
[00:45:23:02 - 00:45:28:13]
Host:
Okay. So now it's time for some quick fire questions, which I know you're going to be good at because Michelle's on fire.
[00:45:30:11 - 00:45:35:19]
Host:
What is a message you want young women and girls to hear? Yeah.
[00:45:35:19 - 00:45:43:05]
Michelle:
I think the message I want young women and girls to hear is go and do you.
[00:45:45:05 - 00:45:47:07]
Michelle:
Stop worrying about what anybody else is doing.
[00:45:48:08 - 00:45:54:15]
Michelle:
Follow and pursue your passion and your purpose and your why. I love that.
[00:45:54:15 - 00:46:03:05]
Host:
I love that. Yeah. I think especially now in this day and age, I feel like especially with young girls, they need even more encouragement.
[00:46:03:05 - 00:46:04:17]
Michelle:
I think more than ever.
[00:46:04:17 - 00:46:08:15]
Host:
And I think misogyny is, oh, babes, we can't online now.
[00:46:08:15 - 00:46:10:22]
Michelle:
We have to be mindful with that.
[00:46:11:22 - 00:46:25:16]
Michelle:
And, and also, you know, you said one question, my message to young girls and women, but my, my message to parents as well is teach your kids right from wrong.
[00:46:27:01 - 00:46:33:14]
Michelle:
Yeah. Start parenting properly. No, seriously. You need a handbook on that. Listen,
[00:46:34:15 - 00:46:45:01]
Michelle:
me and Matthew could do a parenting podcast on this. You should. I think we should. We've got three exceptional children. We come from two different backgrounds, but our values are very similar.
[00:46:46:07 - 00:46:51:01]
Michelle:
Your team. Listen here. Team Robinson, we kick ass. Boom. Love.
[00:46:51:01 - 00:46:55:03]
Host:
Love. What's one myth that you have heard about women's bodies and aging?
[00:46:55:03 - 00:47:03:05]
Michelle:
I think the myth I've heard about women's bodies and aging is you can't look good because you're old.
[00:47:04:07 - 00:47:18:02]
Michelle:
You know, you're declining or, oh God, you can't wear that. And people putting labels on you because you're getting older. I think that's a myth. Yeah. I mean, listen, hey, babe, listen, I look better than someone in 30 year old. You better move. I can't walk in my shoes.
[00:47:18:02 - 00:47:25:20]
Host:
And you could outrun them. Hey, and I could jump them, jump over them too. Hello. And last question,
[00:47:27:07 - 00:47:30:08]
Host:
how did becoming a mother, how has it changed your life?
[00:47:32:16 - 00:47:35:12]
Michelle:
Becoming a mother changed my life. It's always something that I wanted.
[00:47:37:02 - 00:47:48:17]
Michelle:
Um, from about 15, 16, I used to say to my friends, I want to be a mum by 25. I didn't have my first child till I was nearly 32, but I knew I wanted to be a mum.
[00:47:50:02 - 00:47:54:21]
Michelle:
And I think it changed my life clearly for the better,
[00:47:55:21 - 00:48:02:05]
Michelle:
but I was always going to be a mummy. I'm such, I'm such, I'm, I'm a real maternal mummy. Because you know what?
[00:48:03:10 - 00:48:05:19]
Michelle:
I've been blessed with the best mum.
[00:48:07:15 - 00:48:13:21]
Michelle:
My mummy, who's nearly 86, who's nearly 86 is the best mummy in the world.
[00:48:15:04 - 00:48:25:04]
Michelle:
She's always, always, and even when I go to my mum's house, now my mum lives in London, the first thing my mum will say to me as I walk in the door is pass me a compliment.
[00:48:27:16 - 00:49:15:22]
Michelle:
So I've grown up with the best mummy who's always complimented me. And when I see my girls, I'm naturally very affectionate. And they go, Oh, here's Mum and Nina, here's Nina. And I speak to my girls, my 22 year old Reese is in Cambridge, Eden's in Florida, the 19 year old, and Elijah's at home with us in Wales and he's 12. We have a FaceTime call every night between 10 and 11, apart from Elijah, because he's in bed for getting ready for school. So me, Matthew and the two girls were a beautiful family. And I think motherhood for me, has just enhanced my ability to be even more affectionate and loving. But at the same time, don't get it twisted. I put boundaries around behaviors and attitudes. But I know that I'm doing my job well, because even as I walked in here today,
[00:49:17:08 - 00:49:20:18]
Michelle:
my daughter brings me my 22 year old for my advice on something.
[00:49:22:07 - 00:49:24:05]
Michelle:
My daughters always want to come home.
[00:49:25:09 - 00:49:26:23]
Michelle:
So I knew motherhood was going to change me.
[00:49:28:06 - 00:49:37:05]
Michelle:
Because I knew I had a wonderful example of a mother. And I must you know, I must give credit to my dad, who wasn't a great husband, but he was a good daddy.
[00:49:38:13 - 00:50:07:15]
Host:
Wow. I love that. And I think, yeah, your kids wanting to come home and reach out to you says so much about your relationship. And absolutely, the connection you've kept with even them being further afield. Team Robinson. Team Robinson. I want to be in Team Robinson. Team Robinson. Wow. That's so special. And I think, especially if you came from quite a difficult childhood. Absolutely. You crave. I know for me, I crave I want to make a family now because I want that safety around me. And you want you want to create love.
[00:50:07:15 - 00:50:41:20]
Michelle:
Yeah, you want to create love. You want to create harmony. And I have to be mindful, you know, because I you know, I came from a volatile background. So I have to be mindful. And I'm quite, you know, I'm not fiery. Fiery is too strong a word. But I won't shy away from arguing about something, especially with a man. So I'm very aware because of my father and because of my upbringing. So I have to make sure that I don't demasculate my beautiful husband and so that my son also sees that's not right to treat a man like that. Equally, that's not right how to treat a woman. So it's both sides as well.
[00:50:41:20 - 00:51:04:04]
Host:
Wow. Yeah, that's so true. That's so true. Role models. You are the role model of all role models. Thank you. Gorgeous. If you could give a young girl growing up in Wembley right now who was just like you, she maybe she wants to go into sport. Maybe she wants to be an Olympian and maybe she's not sure about her future. What would you say? What would you say to her?
[00:51:04:04 - 00:51:12:03]
Michelle:
I would say to that young girl, go and give it a try. What have you got to lose? Yeah. And you never know what you might gain.
[00:51:12:03 - 00:51:16:06]
Host:
And I feel like you've had that with you all along, haven't you? Yeah. Give it a try.
[00:51:16:06 - 00:51:20:06]
Michelle:
To women and girls, boys, men,
[00:51:21:14 - 00:51:26:20]
Michelle:
sons, daughters, give it a try. Give it a try. Because you never know where it may lead.
[00:51:26:20 - 00:51:36:16]
Host:
Just the wisdom, the wisdom. Honestly, every time. Thank you so much for everything today. I feel like I've been left with like, you need to write a book for one, please.
[00:51:36:16 - 00:51:47:19]
Michelle:
Yeah. That's something that another thing, they've got a couple of things that I'd really like to work on for 2026. Yeah. And it's a book is one. And I'd like to explore the idea of me having my own TV show too.
[00:51:47:19 - 00:51:50:02]
Host:
The Robinsons. I would tune in.
[00:51:51:10 - 00:51:57:22]
Host:
Can we find your producer? Find me the producer. Let's do it. Do you have anything you want to share before we finish?
[00:51:57:22 - 00:52:02:06]
Michelle:
No, I'm pretty good. I just think keep watching this space.
[00:52:03:07 - 00:52:19:11]
Michelle:
And I think my message to everybody is they always say, where can I find you? And yes, I'm on Instagram, I'm Michelle Griffith Robinson. O-L-Y. And you can find me on Twitter. You can find me. But I always say to everybody, go and find yourself first. Because that's most important.
[00:52:19:11 - 00:52:30:18]
Host:
And I think people will leave this podcast today wanting to go and find themselves because if anyone can take just a smidge of what you've said and implement that into their lives, everything's going to change for the better.
[00:52:30:18 - 00:52:33:01]
Michelle:
Be for the better. Thank you for having me.
[00:52:33:01 - 00:52:44:23]
Host:
Thank you. Be more like Michelle. And that's a wrap on another Hormonal Hotline episode. Please be sure to subscribe and please click the bell to get notifications. We cannot wait to have you back and thank you so much for coming.