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This podcast is a production of Watermark Community Church in Dallas, Texas, USA. Watermark exists to be and make more fully devoted followers of Christ, looking to God's Word as our only authority, conscience and guide.
Welcome to church this morning. If this is your first time ever at Watermark on a Sunday, I'm so glad you made it. Our hope here is that this would be a safe place for you to take either your first or your next step with Jesus Christ. Every Sunday, before we jump into studying God's Word, we take a moment and pray, because we believe God is here, that he wants to meet with us. Every person in this room, if you want to, can hear from the living God this morning. One of the best things you can do is just ask him to speak to you.
So, I want to give you a moment right now, if you will… Just pray for yourself. This might be the first time you've talked to God in a long time. That's okay. You can just say, "God, would you speak to me this morning? I want to hear from you today." Then, I want to invite you to pray for the people around you, your family, friends, and other brothers and sisters in the faith. Would you pray that God would speak to them as well? Then, I want to ask you to pray for me and pray that God would speak through me to you.
Lord, I'm so thankful that you are a helper and a healer. You're a rock and a refuge. Even when we talk about a topic such as abuse, I thank you that in the midst of a heavy topic, there can be hope. I just pray that for this room. Lord, I pray for your joy. I pray for your hope. Lord, wherever your conviction is needed, I want to ask you for it.
Would you just have your way in this room this morning? I pray, Holy Spirit, that you would lead and guide each one of us into truth. Would you glorify Christ in our hearts and in our minds? Lord, my prayer for myself today… May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight. In Jesus' name, amen.
As I shared with you, today is a message on abuse, abuse in relationships, especially in marriage. You might hear that and think you might have come to church on the wrong Sunday, like this topic isn't for you, but what I want you to know is that this message is for every person in this room. It's very applicable for everyone. It's definitely applicable for the people in the room who are currently experiencing abuse and don't even realize it. It's also applicable for the people who are abusing another person and might not even realize it.
It's also applicable for the people who've experienced any form of abuse in the past. We might be focusing especially on marriage, but I want you to know, if you've experienced abuse of any form in your past, the truth I'm going to share this morning is also applicable to you. Today is also applicable for anyone who's in a Community Group here, for you to be prepared as a friend, as a Community Group member, to care for someone in your group who might experience abuse.
This is a message for anyone who just wants a healthier marriage, if you're married. This is a message for any single person who might want to safeguard their future marriage. Honestly, this is a message for anyone who wants to know how they can better pray for their spiritual family right here at Watermark Community Church. So, this is a message truly for everyone.
Now, you might be sitting there wondering, "Why are we spending a whole Sunday talking about abuse?" Well, I'll tell you why. If you remember, back in June, we as a church…the elders…updated our marriage, divorce, and remarriage statement. In that statement, we included a short section on abuse.
As we gathered in a room with a couple hundred leaders, members of our church who lead in our marriage ministries… When we went to the Q&A time, the majority of questions were around the topic of abuse, which just reminded us that this is something we need to communicate clearly and specifically about.
Statistics would back it up. Statistics would say that one in three women and one in ten men will experience abuse in their adult lifetime. Because of that, in a room this size, the number of people who have been in abusive relationships or are currently in an abusive relationship must be high. Unfortunately, so many people end up suffering silently. We don't want that to be true of any person who calls this place home.
Typically, the global church has not done a very good job addressing the topic of abuse. We don't want that to be true of us here at Watermark. So, the elders and I feel like it is extremely urgent and important for us to step into this topic. That's why we're talking about it today. I want to start by defining abuse for you so that we're all working from the same definition.
The way we're going to define abuse this morning is this: _abuse_ is oppression for selfish gain. That's how we're defining it. You might hear the word _oppression_ and wonder why we've chosen that word. Well, one of the reasons we're using the word _oppression_ is because, if you were to look in the Bible, you might find the word _abuse_ mentioned only four times total in the entire Bible, but if you were to look up the word _oppressed_, it shows up 125 times in the Bible.
Not all oppression is abuse, but all abuse is oppression. When we study the Scriptures, it is abundantly clear that God's heart is for the oppressed. I think about Psalm 9:9, which says, **"The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble."** Think about what Jesus said in Luke 4. He shares why he came, why the eternal Son of God left heaven willingly and stepped into our reality.
Jesus says in Luke 4:18, **"The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed…"** Abuse is oppression for selfish gain. What do we mean by _oppression_? When you hear the word _oppression_, think prolonged cruel or unjust treatment. We're talking about control, manipulation, coercion, domination, or punishing behaviors. Abuse is oppression for selfish gain.
Now, as we're continuing to get our minds around abuse, there are several things I want to make sure you understand about abuse. First, abuse involves the misuse of God-given power to take advantage of another. Let me say that one more time. Abuse involves the misuse of God-given power to take advantage of another. What do I mean by "God-given power or authority"? Well, think about it. If you are a husband, God has given you a responsibility, a stewardship, to lead in your household, to lead in your marriage, in your family. That is God-given.
If you're a mom or dad, God has given you authority over your children. If you're a teacher or a boss or a mentor, God has placed you in a position that has a level of power or authority over another. For husbands, this is typically true. It's not always true, but typically, God has given you physical strength that is greater than your wife. So, all of that… It's God-given power or authority, and abuse always involves a misuse of that power.
The second thing I want to make sure you know is that abuse is always for selfish gain. The end goal is to get what you want in the relationship. It is to insist on your way. Thirdly, abuse always causes harm to another. Abuse damages a person's dignity, their sense of self-worth, and most times it is damaging to a person's body, mind, and spirit.
Now, abuse can come in all sorts of forms. When we think abuse, we most immediately think of physical abuse, and we _should_ go there quickly, but abuse can be emotional, social, verbal, mental, physical, financial, spiritual, or sexual in nature. If you're just half listening right now, give me the other half right now. Give me both halves. Be all in, because this is not a moment to just hear bits and pieces. You need to hear everything I'm saying.
I'm going to try right now to be as specific as possible. The reason I want to be very, very specific is that I don't want anyone to leave here this morning being abused and not realizing it. At the same time, I don't want anyone leaving here calling something abuse that actually isn't abuse. So, we have to go to great lengths to make sure we're clear on abuse, because what I don't want is people leaving here experiencing abuse and not knowing it. I don't want other people weaponizing the word _abuse_ in your marriage and applying it to anything your spouse does that you don't like.
So, let me be clear. Just because you have a tough or lousy marriage doesn't mean you have an abusive marriage. Just because you have a mediocre spouse doesn't mean you have an abusive spouse. Just because you're tired of being married to your spouse, throwing the word _abuse_ around loosely is not your get-out-of-marriage-free card. That's why I want to be as specific as possible.
When we talk about physical abuse, here's what we're talking about. Physical abuse can include hitting, slapping, punching, choking, pushing, restraining, backing someone into a wall and intimidating them with your presence, or the use of objects to intimidate, as if you pick up something like you're going to throw it at the person.
Emotional or verbal abuse can include criticism, mocking, name calling, yelling, belittling accomplishments, gaslighting someone (meaning, you make them doubt their perception of reality), and it can involve public humiliation or private insults. Spiritual abuse… This is something we have to talk about in the church and in marriage. Spiritual abuse can involve misusing faith, Scripture, or church authority to control or manipulate someone else.
For example, a husband demanding his wife submit to him and have sex even though she has said no, or a husband abusing his wife and saying she has to stay with him because "God hates divorce and it's God's will." Or it could look like a wife consistently shaming her husband, saying things like, "Well, you're the man. God has made you to be the leader, but you're not leading, so I've got to do this. You're not a good leader, so I've got to take care of it. You're not providing for me like I think you should. You're useless. You're weak."
Financial abuse can involve controlling access to money, withholding funds, restricting purchases, demanding receipts, or limiting or forbidding work in order to control the finances. Sexual abuse can involve coercion, unwanted sexual contact, assault, pressuring, forcing, or manipulating consent. People don't realize that rape can occur within marriage.
Abuse is oppression for selfish gain. Darby Strickland says, "No matter what form oppression takes, its intended outcome is the same: to punish and wound a victim so that an oppressor gets their world the way they want it. An oppressor's behavior says, 'Serve me or suffer the consequences!'" So, that's where we have to start. Abuse is oppression for selfish gain.
Next, what I want you to understand is Jesus is the answer for abuse. This is where I want to be really clear, because if you're a victim of abuse, and I just said, "Jesus is the answer for abuse," you might hear that and be like, "I agree," but now you're really worried that I'm just going to oversimplify everything. I'm just going to say, "Just try harder, pray more, and God is going to work it all out."
I want to make sure you know that right now I'm talking more theologically than I'm talking practically. We have to have the right theological understanding of abuse. Here's the reality: God has spoken about abuse in his Word, so we can know God's mind and heart on the topic of abuse. Any conversation on abuse that happens has to have Jesus at the center of it. Why? Because abuse is always a sin issue. _Always_.
One of my goals during the Year of the Word, throughout the course of this year, has been to trace themes throughout the Bible. So, what I want to do for you today is trace the theme of abuse for you in Scripture. Who was the first abuser? The Serpent in the garden. The Serpent in the garden of Eden was the first abuser. He exerted his power over Adam and Eve in the form of manipulation.
What was the result of the Serpent's abuse? Well, Genesis 3:16 is unpacking all of the effects of sin, and listen to what it says. **"To the woman he said, 'I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children.'"** Watch this. "Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you."
That word _desire_ there… When it talks to the woman and says, "Your desire shall be for your husband," that word is carrying the idea of breaking the relationship of equality and turning it into a relationship of servitude and domination. So, that's what he's saying. The woman will want to break a relationship of equality with the man and dominate the husband.
Then it goes on and says about the husband, "He shall rule over you." The idea of _rule_ is the idea of the husband becoming a tyrant in the marriage, that the husband will now have the capacity to become a cruel and oppressive ruler. Watch this. This is at the very beginning of the Bible. The woman at her worst in marriage will be a nemesis to her husband. The husband at his worst will become an abusive husband. This is where abuse finds its roots.
So, if you're skeptical of Christianity, like, if you think the Bible is just a book of mythology, here's my encouragement: Go read it. Because do you know what the Bible does? The Bible makes sense of reality. It makes sense of human experience. We can understand why there's abuse in the world. We see how abuse gains momentum in the Bible very quickly.
You turn the page to Genesis 4. We see jealousy and anger give birth to violence between family members as Cain kills Abel. In Genesis 12 and 20, Abraham presents his wife as his sister for the sake of protection. And what does he do? He opens her up to the potential of being sexually exploited. In Genesis 16 and 21, Hagar is forced into sexual servitude and is then driven away into the wilderness. In Genesis 34, Dinah is raped by Shechem.
You turn the page to Exodus, and what do you find? You find the entire nation of Israel being abused by the nation of Egypt. They're being oppressed. What's interesting is as you continue reading the Old Testament and get into the Prophets, you find the nation of Israel, which had been marked by oppression… They had been oppressed. They actually now become the oppressor, and the prophets are calling them out for their abuse.
Then you fast-forward from the Old Testament all the way to the end of the New Testament. In Revelation 21:4, we read about the new heavens and the new earth. It says, **"He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away."**
You fast-forward to the end of history, and what do we find? There's no more physical, emotional, verbal, sexual, or spiritual abuse. Abuse will be done away with. How is that possible? What changes reality in such a way from going to a broken world marked by abuse to going to a new heaven and new earth where people are whole once again?
Well, if you've been tracking with us in the Year of the Word, right before abuse shows up in Genesis 3:16, what do we have in Genesis 3:15? It's the promise that a Serpent crusher would come, that one would come who would reverse the effects of the fall. What does that mean? It means a Serpent crusher would come and do away with abuse. Jesus Christ is the Serpent crusher. How would Jesus rid the world of abuse? By entering into humanity and enduring abuse himself.
So, if you are a victim of abuse in this room, you have a savior who knows what it's like to be abused. He was abused so we could be healed. Isaiah 53:5 says, **"But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed."** Jesus endured verbal, emotional, and physical abuse so we could be healed.
You might hear me say that, and you're like, "Okay. Well, that sounds great in theory, that Jesus was abused so we could be healed." I want you to hear me. If you're not listening, listen up. Jesus was abused not so we could be healed _one_ day but so we could experience healing _today_. Jesus wants healing for you _now_.
This is where I want to speak very specifically to both the abused and the abusers in the room, because I believe God wants healing for both of you. If you're a victim of abuse, and you just heard me say that God wants healing for the abuser, that might be really tough for you to hear right now. I get it. Yet I just want to ask you to stick with me to hear what God has for you this morning.
First, I want to talk to the victims of abuse in this room. Here's what I want you to know: _God sees, protects_, _and provides for the abused_. Psalm 9:9 says, **"The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble."** Psalm 46:1 says, **"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."**
If you're a victim of abuse, if you are currently being abused, what I want you to hear from me is that God sees your abuse, and he is not okay with it. God hates the abuse you're experiencing right now, and God doesn't expect you to just tolerate or endure that abuse. He sees your abuse, and he wants to make practical provision for your safety.
So, if you are currently experiencing abuse, I just want to share very practically with you what you're worthy of. I use that word _worthy_ very intentionally. It's interesting. Even as the victim, you can still feel feelings of guilt or shame in the midst of abuse, so you might not feel like you're worthy of something. I'm just telling you this morning what you're worthy of.
First, you are worthy of immediate safety. You do not need to go another day, especially experiencing physical abuse. You are worthy of a safe place to stay where you are not in immediate danger. You're also worthy of support, spiritual, emotional, and practical support. I want you to know our team has been working for months for today. This is the culmination of months of effort by amazing men and women on our staff.
Our team has worked hard to gather extensive resources in order to direct you in case you're in need of counseling, legal assistance, medical assistance, or financial help. So, if you're currently experiencing abuse, here's what I want to ask you to do. You have a few options. One would be to come up after the service. Our Care Team is ready, prepared for today, to talk with anyone who might be currently abused. If that's you, you can come up after the service and talk to one of our Care Team members.
If you don't feel comfortable doing that this morning, then you can take the perforated section of the Watermark News you were handed on your way in. You can fill it out and just write the word _help_. Put your information, but then just write the word _help_. You can turn it in to one of the giving boxes at the back or you can take it to the welcome desk out in the Town Center. That's what you can do.
If that's still too much, you can go to _watermark.org/connect_. You can fill out our digital connect card, where you can fill out your information and just write the word _help_. People on our staff will know exactly what to do to help you this week. If you're watching online right now, I want to encourage you, if you're currently experiencing abuse, to call the National Domestic Violence Hotline. You can text _START_ to 88788 or you can go to [thehotline.org](https://www.thehotline.org/).
If you're not currently experiencing abuse, but you've experienced abuse in your past, and you still sense that you have ground to take in your journey toward healing… If you don't know where to start, the invitation is the same to you, to either come up front or to fill out a connect card. If sexual abuse is a part of your story, I would encourage you to check out our ministries Courageous Hope or MENd. You can find out more information on our website. These are our sexual abuse ministries, both to men and to women.
Now I want to talk to Community Group members. I want to help you be a good friend, a good Community Group member, in case someone in your group experiences abuse. There are a few things I want to make sure you know so you can be helpful, not hurtful, in situations of abuse. First, let me just say this. In Community Group settings, it is possible to care more about reconciling the marriage than caring for the individuals in the marriage. If we're not careful, we will end up pressuring a victim to stay in harm's way for the sake of the marriage.
So, here's what I want to make sure you know. There is a difference between confession and repentance. Confession is important. If an abuser asks his or her spouse for forgiveness, that's a great first step, but those aren't the magic words to get to go on with life as normal. No. They need to show, over an extended period of time, that they're truly repentant. In certain situations, there needs to be physical space between the abuser and the abused for the victim to be safe and for the abuser to demonstrate a truly repentant life.
This is important as well. It's not the abuser who declares themselves healthy again. It's not the abuser who tells the group, "Hey, I'm in a good place. We should just get back to normal." It's the community of faith that affirms good deeds in keeping with repentance. Don't think days and weeks. Think months and even years.
As a Community Group member, I would encourage you to ask good follow-up questions. Don't automatically assume everything is just a marital issue. If something doesn't sit right with you, pause, ask the Spirit of God to give you discernment and courage, and then ask a few follow-up questions. You can ask questions like, "Hey, are you afraid to disagree with your spouse? Do you feel pressured to do things you do not want to do? Are there two sets of rules in your house, one for you and one for your spouse?"
If you want to learn more, I would encourage everyone here to go to [watermark.org/abuse](https://www.watermark.org/elders/marriage-divorce-remarriage/abuseresources). Our team has created a very robust guide that can help you be a good friend in times of abuse. Then, let me encourage you. In moments of abuse, don't pressure forgiveness. Forgiveness will always be an important step in a victim's journey toward healing. Forgiveness is always possible, but we have to understand that it's a progression. For some people, trauma needs to be processed in order to even get to a place to fathom forgiveness. Just to be clear, forgiveness doesn't always mean reconciliation or restoration of the relationship.
Now I want to speak to the abuser in the room. Here's what I want you to know: _abuse has no place in the life of a Christian_. If you are here, and you call yourself a Christian, a follower of Jesus Christ, and you are abusing another, consider that the most sobering warning sign, God reaching into your life right now, saying, "I'm not okay with it." Abuse has no place in the life of a Christian. Here's the tough thing about abuse: Abusers are often blind to their destructive behavior. Abusers can't see their abuse.
So, here's what I want to do right now. I want to let the Bible do the work. I want to let the Bible do the talking. I'm even going to pray right now. I'm just going to ask the Spirit of God to open people's eyes where they need to be opened. Here's what I _don't_ want. I don't want to cause unnecessary worry in people who _aren't_ being abusive. But to those who _are_ and are complacent, my hope right now is that the Spirit of God, in a very unmistakable way, would light you up.
So, Holy Spirit, I pray even right now that today would be the end of abuse for some abusers in the room. Would you use your Word to convict in an unmistakable way, I pray, amen.
Colossians 3:19 says, **"Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them."** Ephesians 4:29-32 says, **"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. And do not bring sorrow to God's Holy Spirit by the way you live.**
**Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you."**
First Corinthians 13:4-5: **"Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged."** Galatians 5:22-23: **"But the fruit of the Spirit…"** This is what is evident of people who have the Spirit of God at work in them. **"…is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."**
Let me just say this. If the Spirit is convicting you at all right now, let me beg you to not rationalize your sin or excuse your sin or minimize your sin. That's the kindness of God in your life. Your next step is to confess. It's to repent. Don't minimize it. Don't rationalize it. Psalm 11:5 says, **"The Lord tests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked and the one who loves violence."** Romans 12:19 says, **"Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, 'Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.'"** No one gets away with abuse. No sin will go unpunished. Listen to what 2 Timothy 3:1-5 says.
**"But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people."**
Isn't that interesting? If you're an abuser in this room and you're bent on abusing, the Bible would tell us to avoid you, to have nothing to do with you. God hates your abuse. I hate your abuse. The elders hate your abuse. I just want to be abundantly clear. You do not have a place at this church as long as you're bent on abuse.
Yet, here's what I want you to know: Jesus can change your life. He _can_. Jesus can change your life. Even as I was walking this room and praying before this service, my prayer was that the brokenness and the abuse of today would one day just be a story, a testimony of God's miraculous grace.
In their book _When Home Hurts_ by Jeremy Pierre and Greg Wilson, they identify the path forward for the abuser in the room. Here's what needs to become true. It's going to require you to, first, see your abuse. My hope is that the Spirit of God is giving some of you sight this morning where you're seeing your abuse clearly.
Seeing your abuse has to lead to you owning your abuse. Not minimizing it, not rationalizing it, not trying to explain it away, but just owning it, saying, "It's abuse. It is what it is. It's abuse." Then it will require you to hate your abuse, to say, "Look. This is not okay. I hate that this is even a part of my life, and I want to be done with it." That hate has to lead to you turning from your abuse. That's called _repentance_.
As I've already said, there is a difference between confession… It's great to acknowledge that what you've done is wrong. It's great to ask for forgiveness. That's confession. But there's a difference between confession and repentance. Trust can never be reestablished in a relationship… A victim can never be safe until repentance has led to proven, visible, sustained, Christ-empowered, miraculous change. Finally, what I want everyone in this room to hear, both abused and abuser, is abuse isn't the end of your story.
Let me just talk right now to the victims of abuse in the room. If you're a victim of abuse, my hope is that you'd find comfort in the words of Psalm 34:18. It says, **"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit."** Do you hear what that's saying? It's saying even right now, the Lord is near. If your heart is aching, if your heart feels broken, if you feel crazy right now, the Lord is near to you, and he's near to save. That's not talking about eternal salvation; that's talking about salvation now. It means he sees you. He knows, he cares, and he's working.
If you're a victim of abuse, here's what I really want you to hear me say: _no one can take more from you than Jesus wants to give to you_. Your abuser might have tried to take your worth, might have tried to steal your self-esteem, and that's why you feel damaged. Yet 1 Corinthians 6 tells us that you are bought with a price. Do you know what you're worth to God? You're worth the body and blood of Jesus Christ. That's your worth. That's who you are.
Your abuser might have tried to take your purity. That's why you feel dirty. But Jesus Christ calls you his bride. He makes all things new. You are forever clean and permanently new in Christ. Your abuser might have tried to take your safety and your trust, yet Jesus Christ invites you into his family where you belong to the body of Christ right here at Watermark. You have a safe place to be and to belong, to be cared for, to be comforted, to be protected, and to process safely.
Lastly, your abuser might have tried to take your future. They might have tried to make abuse your story. Let's just be clear. Your abuser doesn't have the rights to your story. The rights to your story don't belong to your abuser; they belong to your victor, Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is the one who declared victory over sin and death when he left the tomb empty on the third day, the one whom your abuser will have to stand before one day in judgment. Your victor, Jesus Christ, is the Great Physician. He is the helper. He's the healer. He's the restorer. Don't lose heart.
If you're here this morning and you're the abuser, here's what I want you to hear: abuse doesn't have to be the end of your story either. Here's the reality. If you're an abuser, there's a good chance you were abused at some point in your life. One of the reasons you abuse is that you've experienced abuse. I believe Jesus wants to reach into your life and heal. Yet don't keep moving forward in abuse. To you, 2 Peter 3:9-10 says:
**"The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, and then the heavens will pass away with a roar, and the heavenly bodies will be burned up and dissolved, and the earth and the works that are done on it will be exposed."**
Just because you get away with abuse today, just because you can walk in here…you got your shirt ironed and pressed nicely, you can smile, you can shake hands, you can sing all of the words to all of the songs…it doesn't mean God doesn't see, and it doesn't mean a day isn't coming where he won't expose and judge. Repent. Turn from your sin. Turn to Christ. Jesus is a rock and a refuge and a shelter. He's a healer. He's near. Would you turn to him today? Let's pray together.
I just want to give you a moment. I want to give you a few different ways to respond right now. First, if you're a victim of abuse, if you are currently being abused, would you just decide right now what step you're going to take, whether it's to come down front or to fill out a connect card? Would you just ask God right now to give you the courage to take that step?
If you are realizing that you are currently abusing your spouse in marriage, then right now, confess that to the Lord and repent. Decide in your heart right now that you're going to take a step as well. It might be to come down front to the Care Team. I'd encourage you to do so. It would be to leave and to tell your Community Group, to invite trusted people in, and it would be to ask forgiveness of your spouse today.
If you're a Community Group member, maybe you're realizing today that you haven't been the most faithful friend in a case of abuse. Maybe you need to find someone and seek their forgiveness. Maybe you want to pray for your marriage or your future marriage or the marriages at this church and just ask the Spirit of the living God to have his way, that there would just be more and more health in the marriages in this church, that more and more marriages would point to the love Christ has for his bride.
Finally, if you're here this morning and you don't have a relationship with Jesus Christ… God brought you here today to introduce you to himself. Maybe you're realizing that Jesus was abused so your soul could be healed. He lived perfectly, died sacrificially, and rose victoriously. He went to the cross to be punished so you wouldn't have to be. Only Jesus can bring healing to your relationship with God. Would you take a moment and respond to God?
Lord, I pray for your hope and your healing in this room right now. Lord, I pray for your grace. I pray that you would do a miraculous work in the hearts of every person in this room. I pray for healing for the abused. I pray conviction for the abuser. Lord, I pray for every marriage in this room to take a step toward health.
Lord, even the smallest things, even the fights on the way to church today… I pray that today would be filled with conversations of asking for forgiveness and extending it, Lord. Would you just be pleased in our church today? It's your church, not ours. It's yours. We're your people, and we want to be pleasing to you. In Jesus' name, amen.