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The happiness in retirement podcast is a holistic financial planning show that teaches you how to maximize your wealth and your happiness, and its for anyone who wants to squeeze all the juice out of their life - and their money.
Welcome to the Happiness in Retirement podcast, where
we help you turn your retirement dreams into reality. Each
week, we'll dive into smart financial strategies, lifestyle
tips, and expert insights to help you build a fulfilling and
secure retirement. Whether you're planning ahead or
already enjoying retirement, this is your go-to place
for inspiration and practical advice. So sit
back, relax, and let's make your golden years the
Welcome to this episode of the Happiness in Retirement Program podcast. I'm
Bill Del Sette. Thank you for listening. Today,
I want to talk about how do we have a good life.
When I trademarked happiness in retirement, yes, it is in
fact trademarked, I thought, well, happiness certainly
is a good thing. Is there something deeper?
And as it turns out, of course there is. There's meaning, for
instance. But what is it that creates a
good retirement or a great life for that matter?
What are the ingredients that will
lead to a wonderful life?
You probably know about The
studies that have been done about the relationship between money
and happiness, a lot of research still being done now,
some conflicting evidence now, but generally speaking, research
shows that once you reach a certain level of income,
any income beyond that does not contribute proportionally
to happiness, and there's a point in fact where happiness kind
of maxes out. The income level is
the level at which you can provide for your basic
needs, food, shelter, clothing, et cetera. And
once you have those basic needs covered, money generally
does not buy more happiness. Now, it can be used, I believe, to
create more meaning, but not necessarily more happiness.
So if it isn't money or income that is what you
should be after. Tell that to a lot of folks these days whose
goal it is to become rich. But if it's not money that leads
to happiness, if you will, then what exactly does?
And is it really happiness we're after? Because we all do things
that don't necessarily make us happy, but perhaps contribute
to something else that matters to us. And on that
note, I want to talk about a book by a gentleman you
may have heard of, The gentleman's name is Martin Seligman.
S-E-L-I-G-M-A-N. Martin Seligman, he
is considered the founder of the field of
psychology, one of the world's leading psychologists. And
he wrote a book called Flourish. It's a few years old
now. But in the book, he states that he does not like the
idea of happiness. what he considers to be a
good life, what contributes to a good life. Yes, it may
be happiness is one of the ingredients or one
of the elements in one of the ingredients, but
it's not just about feeling good. It's living a life filled
with meaning, purpose, and connection. Interesting. Notice
that money isn't in there. Now, I know many of us
were raised to believe that success was about working hard, raising
a family, and then if we're lucky, enjoying a peaceful retirement. But
the truth is, retirement isn't the end of the story. It's just the start
of a new chapter. And Flourish gives us a roadmap to
make that chapter rich and fulfilling. The book that Seligman wrote
is called Flourish. And in that book, he talks
about the five ingredients to what he
calls the PERMA model, which leads to a
flourishing life. Now, notice he didn't call it a life of happiness.
It doesn't necessarily mean you're going to be happy. Flourishing is
on a different level. If you're flourishing, yeah, you
may be happy, but you probably have a whole bunch of other positive
indicators in your life. PERMA, P-E-R-M-A, stands
for positive emotion, engagement, relationships, meaning,
and accomplishment. Those are the five ingredients, according to
Seligman, that lead to a flourishing life. So
let's look at each one of these and how they can contribute to
an amazing life, whether you're in retirement or not. The
first is positive emotion, which does include happiness. Now,
Positive emotion also means gratitude or joy,
different than happiness, maybe comfort. Gratitude, joy,
and comfort. Finding the small things that make us
smile every day. So important. So
many studies done on the importance of expressing gratitude every
single day and how just doing that one act every
day consistently can actually make you happier. Great
book, The Gratitude Diaries by Janice Kaplan.
K-A-P-L-A-N was a bestseller. She
spent a year expressing gratitude and she was very
intentional about it in all areas of her life. And
what a difference it made in her life. Great read. The importance of
gratitude that can create positive emotion.
Being happy, certainly. There is well being comfortable
the small things that make you smile so that's positive emotion in
the perma model next in the perma model for a
flourishing life is engagement that feeling of
being in the zone when you're doing something you love years ago
i wrote a blog post about my neighbor my neighbor was a
mechanic and you know i was a young kid and i would Go for
a visit with him sometimes while he was working on cars and the
guy was just blinded by mechanics you know the guy love this
work and he was out in this garage for hours and hours this white
yelling come on command it's time to eat and he just couldn't get
enough of it you know he would lose track of time working
on cars. Well, it turns out he was onto something and that
feeling of being in the zone or what is known now
as the flow state. When you're doing something you
love, Stephen Kotler's work, a book called Gnar Country,
G-N-A-R by Stephen Kotler, K-O-T-L-E-R, about
finding flow later in life. It's when
you lose track of time, what are the things that you do, like
this mechanic, when you lose track of time. In other words, you're
not worried about the future, you're not thinking about the past, you're in the moment.
Whatever you're doing, it's just got a hold of you. This feeling
of being in the zone, that's engagement. When
you're doing something you love, when you retire, you've got to have that. We
talked in the prior episode of the Happiness in Retirement Program
podcast about The percentage of people that when they retire,
they aren't any happier. In fact, they could be less happy and
maybe it's because they don't have that engagement. So engagement
is so, so important. Finding flow, doing
things that get you in that state. You know what
they are for you. And one of Steven Kotler's books called The Rise
of Superman, he looks at people that do extreme sports and
they do it because they want to get into this flow state. And
we could do that. Just simple things, again, gardening, painting, photography,
big one, volunteering. So engagement, the second ingredient
to a flourishing retirement. First, positive emotion, gratitude,
joy, comfort. Second, engagement, being in the zone, doing
things you absolutely love. doing number three
the third ingredient in the perma model of flourishing is
relationships i've read that lonely
or loneliness can be just as bad for your health is smoking two
packs of cigarettes a day staying socially connected. It's
so important to research around this is unequivocal. Investing
in friendships, family, and new communities. When you retire,
when you stop working, if you have a job where you
have social connections, you may lose those connections. And
then you've got to create new ones, which is fine, but it
becomes more difficult later in life to do so. So it's
going to take effort on your part to do that.
We know loneliness can be a challenge in retirement. Relationships are
key. And how do you go about creating new relationships?
Make it a goal. Read How to Win Friends and Influence
People, the classic by Dale Carnegie. Classic,
classic book about relationship building. So
maintaining and creating new relationships, maybe
you're going to move. Maybe when you stop working, maybe when you
retire, you're going to go to a different state. You got to maintain those
friendships. You got to stay close with family. And if
you can't, you've got to create new relationships, which is going to take an
effort on your part. Next in this PERMA model of
flourishing is meaning. Feeling part of something
bigger. So important. Many, many people feel
that meaning is the most important part of it all. You've
got to find meaning. And again, many people find meaning in their work.
It doesn't have to be anything life-changing. It doesn't
have to be anything grandiose. You can be
a carpenter or a janitor and finding meaning in
your work, it doesn't matter what the work is. It could be mentoring
others, it could be volunteering or involved in
faith or service, being of service, religion. Classic
book and the importance of meaning is Viktor Frankl's
Man's Search for Meaning. Viktor Frankl, F-R-A-N-K-L.
Viktor Frankl and his family were shipped off to Anansi concentration
camp and he lost his entire family there. He almost died
on numerous occasions. And in his own words, the
people that made it out of the concentration camps were the ones that
had something to live for that would give that meaning. And
according to Frankel, one of the most important aspects of
living. So what do you do that gives you meaning? If
it's work and you stop working, well, you better find a way to find
meaning. Outside of work maybe again it's a hobby maybe
it's being of service maybe it's contributing giving back
maybe it's your faith whatever it may be mentoring others volunteering
different ways to find me. The fifth ingredient in
the perma model of flourishing is accomplishment. Setteng
and achieving goals even small ones learning a new skill running a five
k finishing a project walking a five k
things to give you a sense of pride you'll notice that
pretty much every single one of these ingredients to a flourishing life
can be found at work. And
for those of us that have worked a good long time you
have to find a way. to have these ingredients in
your life outside of work. You've got to create them. Again,
great book on accomplishment. It's called Drive the
Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us by a gentleman, very
popular author right now, Daniel Pink, P-I-N-K. Drive
the Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, and guess what? It's
not money. As Daniel Pink writes, so when you
stop working, you've got to find a way to be engaged. You've
got to find a way to build or maintain relationships.
You've got to find meaning and you've got to find accomplishment. You've
got to set goals, never ever stop. Setteng goals
and achieving those goals doesn't have to be again grandiose could
be small ones but all of these things that many people
find in their work life many of the ingredients of the
promo model now you've got to find outside of work life
if you stop working or don't stop working. Now, how
does this also relate to money? Well, what if you were to
use your money knowing about the retirement income smile and
how we gradually spend less as we age out, then
how can you spend your money such that you
will generate positive emotion, engagement, build relationships and
meaning and accomplish things? Well,
certainly in the engagement category, I don't
know, Whatever it is, whatever turns you on. Are you
the mechanic working on the car for hours? Do more of that. Maybe
it's skydiving. Maybe it's golfing. Whatever it
may be, gardening. For me, it's photography, man. I'm out
there with my camera and spend a while, but I could spend hours
and hours. doing landscape photography just out there
in the country early in the morning when you practice photography you've
got to get up early to catch that good light and you're just out there and
you're in the moment and what a great feeling that's flow so
what is it for you? where you're going to get this engagement being
in the zone. What about relationships? Where are you going
to find those relationships? How are you going to build relationships? How
are you going to get involved? Maybe it's volunteering, maybe it's
mentoring, maybe it's being more involved in your church, if
that's your thing. And if you get that at work, if those relationships
are work-related as they are for so many of us, you've got
to find a way to maintain relationships afterward.
And accomplishment, same kind of thing. Work is one
of the main ways people feel accomplished is in their work. And
meaning certainly falls in that category as well. So how are you going to
find meaning? So just some things to think about. If you read the book,
Flourish by Martin Seligman, think about how are you going
to get these elements of PERMA that will cause you
to flourish in retirement? How are you going to get positive emotion?
How are you going to remain engaged? Who are the people that will make up
the relationships in your retirement? Where are you going to find the meaning
and what are you going to do to remain accomplished
or accomplishing? So important. Seligman talks
about people in their 60s, 70s, or 80s who are
thriving because they found their purpose and connection. And all
of this is backed up with science. It's not just fluff. It's research based
and proven to make life richer now. There
is an exercise in the book in which Sullivan talks about
signature strength signature strength in
the context of positive psychology, are the character traits
that are most prominent and meaningful to you making unique and
authentic, There are the qualities you enjoy expressing that
energize you, leading to increased well-being and
performance, and how this all ties back to the PERMA model.
So, some homework for you, please, as part of this.
I want you to Google a VIA, V-I-A,
character strengths, signature strengths test, and
go and take the test. It's called the VIA survey,
V-I-A survey, and it is free, and
it will take about 10 minutes, and it'll help you discover your signature
strengths that will help you do all the things. fulfill
on the ingredients of the PERMA model. For instance, increase
happiness and well-being, finding meaning and purpose, boosting relationships,
managing stress and health, and accomplishing goals. Once you know
those signature strengths, you can put them to work.
And the idea is to do the things that
will lead you to have happiness and meaning
in retirement. What struck me most about the book
Flourish is how it applies to the retiree journey. After decades
of working, we often ask ourselves, what next? What's now?
According to Seligman, and I certainly absolutely can agree with this, that
we can still grow, we can still make a contribution, we can still
matter at any age. As Seligman writes, one
of my favorite quotes in the book, the good life consists in
deriving happiness by using your signature strengths every
day in the main realms of your life. That
means using the gifts you've built over a lifetime, your wisdom, patience,
humor, compassion, to keep contributing to
the world in a way that feels true to you. So
whether you're newly retired or have been for years, the book Flourish offers
practical tools and thoughtful inspiration for building a life
of purpose, connection, and joy. It's a reminder that just because we've
left the nine to five behind, it doesn't mean
we stop growing. In fact, maybe now is when we
really begin to flourish. Thank you for joining me
on the Happiness in Retirement Program podcast. If flourish
resonates with you or if you've found ways to
bring more meaning into your life after retirement, I'd love to hear
from you. Send me a message at bill at happinessinretirement.com. Until
next time, keep reading, keep growing, and remember it's
never too late to flourish. Talk to you soon.
Del Ceti Capital Management, LLC. Del Ceti is
a registered investment advisor. Advisory services are only
offered to clients or prospective clients where Del Ceti and its representatives
are properly licensed or exempt from licensure. For additional information,
please visit our website at www.happinessinretirement.com. That's
it for today's episode of the Happiness in Retirement Program podcast.
We hope you found some valuable insights to help you create the retirement
you deserve. If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to
subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who's planning for
their future. For more tips and resources, visit happinessinretirement.com
or the Del Ceti Capital Management Facebook page. Until next
time, here's to a happy, healthy, and financially secure