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The Space for Sistas™ Podcast is a weekly conversation with Dr. Dominique Pritchett, a licensed therapist, speaker and well-being consultant from Kenosha, Wisconsin and guests. We are a wellness podcast for Black women and teen girls who are ready to dream, decide and do what’s necessary to live well.This week it's Dr. Dominique jammin' solo! __________________________________________________________________________Want to connect with Space for Sistas™?WebsiteInstagramFacebookThe hashta...
The Space for Sistas® Podcast is a weekly-ish chat with Dr. Dominique Pritchett and guests about all things health and wellness leaving you with actionable solutions to step into our most authentic selves.
Welcome to the space versus this
podcast.
We are a wellness podcast for
black women who are ready to
dream decide and do what's
necessary to live well.
I'm your host, Dr.
Dominique Pritchett.
And today it's me.
No guest.
Today.
I want to talk about.
A prompt that was put out on
social media by.
Really cool individuals who
works with couples to help them
find love and be the best
Powermate possible.
They were talking about
emotional dumping.
I chimed in and said please
define your understanding of
emotional dumping as I believe
that is a great way to have a
very in-depth and cool
conversations.
And so they provided their
definition, in a different post,
I posted, venting any emotional
processing is different than
emotional dumping.
I would emotionally process or
vent to my partner based on the
capacity that they have to host
space for me.
while being considerate of their
feelings, their needs as well.
This topic is particularly
sensitive to black women.
As we are often categorized or
stereotyped as having an
inability to express our
emotions in a calm, grounded,
emotionally intelligent way.
Hence, why many people still use
the angry black woman when
describing.
Our ways of communicating when
that's not always the case.
It is important that we take a
shared responsibility for how we
communicate.
Today I want to focus on two
ways.
To release emotions, dumping
versus processing, because
processing your emotions is on a
spectrum of unhealthy to
unhealthy communication.
One of the best ways to release
emotions.
It's to find a healthy outlet.
It could be talking to a trusted
friend or family member.
Uh, seeking professional support
with a therapist or counselor.
Writing in a journal going for a
walk, engaging in a hobby or
sport, listening to music, or
just doing something creative,
such as painting or sculpting.
By finding healthy ways to
express your emotions, it can
help you to process and move
through them in a positive way,
rather than sweeping them under
the rug or emotionally dumping
on other people.
And this can be done directly or
indirectly.
Emotional dumping can be
described as essentially venting
on a task.
Venting on a toxic and
inconsiderate level, regardless
of the other person consenting
to being on the other end.
Many times emotional dumping is
the result of emotional distress
and often done without the
permission of the receiving
person.
Keep in mind.
They may not always be ready to
receive what you have to say, or
even host space for heavy topics
that you may present.
This can leave them.
Thinking about your dumping way
after the fact you have dumped,
you have moved on and they might
be, uh, take ownership of your
stuff.
When toxic emotional dumping
happens, unconsciously.
Without regard for the other
person.
It's often done with the hopes
of receiving ongoing empathetic
responses and validation.
This is unrealistic and unfair.
Uh, person.
I may not say anything because
maybe they don't know what to
say.
Or how to best support you.
Don't be surprised if they
develop resentment, which
develops from unresolved
conflict and pain and
relationships.
And I'm just not talking about
intimate relationships.
To hold resentment.
If the unwillingness refusal or
inability to forgive another
person.
Now emotional processing, it can
be difficult and challenging at
times.
It is also incredibly important.
When communicating and
expressing your emotions.
It is the process of expressing
and releasing pent up emotions
in a healthy and constructive
way.
This approach to communicating
involves finding safe spaces to
express one's feelings without
judgment or criticism.
Taking the time to process and
work through your emotions can
help you feel more balanced,
grounded, and present.
It can also help to create more
meaningful connections with
others and foster a greater
sense of wellbeing and even
belonging.
There are a variety of ways to
help with emotional processing.
Again, such as talking to a
trusted friend or family member
journaling, expressing yourself
through art.
Meditating at engaging in forms
of therapeutic modalities with
your counselor or therapist.
It's important to find what
works best for you.
And remember you are not alone
on this journey.
The key to processing is
consideration for the other
person.
Listening and communication is
reciprocal.
Meaning it goes both ways.
And that instance you'll create
space for them to process as
well.
Even with consideration and good
intent.
It is the other person shared
responsibility to communicate.
If they don't have the capacity
to listen.
And hold space for you.
Then while practicing emotional
intelligence skills.
Such as regulating yourself.
Being open to new ideas.
Figuring out how to navigate
change.
It is important for you to
accept and honor their capacity.
Now to compare.
Emotional dumping versus
emotional processing.
Processing is the act of
expressing one's thoughts and
feelings to another person in a
constructive way.
Emotional dumping on the other
hand is the act of expressing
once thoughts and feelings to
another person, without any
regard to whether it's helpful
or constructive for both of you.
Processing can help someone work
through a difficult situation
while emotional dumping can be
damaging to relationships and
leave the person on the
receiving end, feeling
overwhelmed or even unsupported.
A third caveat to emotional
processing is venting.
It sounds very similar to
emotional processing and it is
the release of strong emotions
such as anger, frustration, and
sadness.
It is a healthy way to process
that can help people cope with
their feelings.
We're do stress and improve your
mental and emotional wellbeing.
Look with venting, you can do it
alone or with someone.
And again, going back to who you
can lean on Fran family member,
therapist, counselor.
You can do it through activities
of expression, such as drawing,
writing, and definitely getting
that physical exercise to
release all of those built up
emotions.
It is important to use venting
as a way to help manage and
process difficult emotions in
order to lead to a healthier
life.
Now as a therapist.
Let's talk about therapy and
emotional processing.
So what therapist or counselor
we're using those
interchangeably?
Can help you with processing
your emotions.
It's important that they create
a safe and supportive
environment for you to explore
your emotions and identify the
underlying causes.
They can help you understand how
your emotions are impacting your
life and how to identify and
manage them in healthy ways.
That therapist or counselor can
provide techniques for
self-regulation.
And positive coping skills, such
as safe confrontation
techniques.
Mindfulness and relaxation
methods.
To help you with processing
those feelings in a productive
way.
Additionally.
They can help you develop
healthier ways of thinking and
problem solving so that you can
better address the issues that
are causing your emotional
distress.
Keep in mind.
Emotional dumping, maybe a first
beginning phase of you learning
to better process your emotions.
That way a therapist can
facilitate the change behavior.
With someone who is frequently
triggered by distress X out
their emotions, or even lacks
emotional intelligence.
A safe confrontation technique
that should be facilitated by a
therapist is the empty chair
technique, bike, a Stolt.
He's one of those old cats from
back in the day who came up with
this technique, you know, right.
All were frightened him.
But keep in mind.
The empty chair technique.
Doesn't have to be so literal.
It is a powerful tool used to
help people process and move
through unresolved emotions.
It involves a person picturing
or talking to a significant
person in their life who may be
contributing to their emotional
pain or distress.
By talking to this imaginary
person in the empty chair out
loud.
This person can express their
emotions, including anger,
sadness, hurt things.
They haven't said things they
wished they would've said
without fear judgment or
repercussion.
Keep in mind this person's
imaginary.
So in the space with your
therapist, the therapist is
facilitating this activity.
The intention of this technique.
Can't be to help the person gain
a better understanding of their
situation and resolve their
emotions by letting it all out
and identifying what are the
pieces that requires attention.
Even though you may be
processing this with a
therapist, emotional dumping may
not be the most advantageous use
of your therapeutic time.
So through this activity, we can
pick out what's pertinent,
what's necessary to deal with
because all that built up stuff,
you realize it may not have been
your stuff you've been holding
onto, and that you've been
dumping onto other people.
This is where you start to hear
things like generational hurt,
generational trauma,
generational pain, give people
back their stuff.
As I get ready to wrap up.
I think it's important to
mention how culture plays a part
in emotional processing.
Understanding cultural.
Understanding culture and
emotional processing can be
beneficial for improving
communication and relationships.
It involves recognizing patterns
of behavior and communication
styles that are distinct to
different cultures and learning
to interpret and respond to
emotions in ways that are
appropriate and respectful.
Through this understanding, we
can develop a better
understanding of each other.
Build stronger relationships.
Honor the time and experiences
we have with people.
And foster greater empathy and
understanding.
If you need support with
navigating communication
barriers, please seek
professional help with a
therapist or counselor.
Thank you so much for listening,
please subscribe, download, and
share.
Got a topic you would like us to
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