Dark Dialogue: Shadow Chat Sessions

Welcome back to Shadow Chat Sessions, where the news is weird, the crimes are dumb, the universe is probably haunted, and John is fueled entirely by sarcasm and caffeine.
This episode delivers one of our wildest mixes yet:

🐙 A psychic octopus predicts the election and leaves oceanographers questioning their degrees.

🌐 The Dead Internet Theory crawls back from the digital grave.

🔮 The 2025 Dystopia Forecast — because apparently we needed more things to worry about.

🍲 A cook is arrested for stealing “secret recipes” from his own restaurant.

📞 An inmate pretends to be a judge and tries to call the jail to free his buddy.

🛁 A man breaks into a home, takes a drunken bath, and refuses to leave, boasting a blood alcohol level that could strip paint.

✨ Strange lights return over the Nevada desert (of course they do).

👣 Ghost Soldiers appear again on the Appalachian Trail.

🦍 Bigfoot DNA from Oregon heads for testing.

🪬 A Roman cursed tablet surfaces in Bath, England.

💥 Sky quakes shake the Eastern U.S. — but scientists are still shrugging.

Every story comes with full breakdowns, deep-dive details, and John’s signature sarcastic takes, including the now-iconic response to the bathtub bandit:

“Somewhere there’s a mugshot of this guy in a towel looking like a criminally hydrated Buddha.”

If you love bizarre headlines, haunted forests, glitch-in-the-matrix moments, and criminals who should honestly have to pass a sobriety test before attempting a crime — this episode is for you.

📣 Calls to Action
If you enjoy the show, keep the chaos alive:
👍 Like the episode⭐ Leave a review🔔 Tap the bell / follow button📧 Send questions, kudos, case suggestions, or weird stories → info@darkdialogue.com🌐 Visit the website → www.darkdialogue.com🤝 Join the Dark Dialogue Collective — our boots-on-the-ground research & support community🕯️ Adopt-a-Victim and help uncover answers in real unsolved cases❤️ Support the show on Patreon, Ko-fi, or Substack for bonus episodes, extended case files, and behind-the-scenes content

Show Notes

Welcome back to Shadow Chat Sessions, where the news is weird, the crimes are dumb, the universe is probably haunted, and John is fueled entirely by sarcasm and caffeine.

This episode delivers one of our wildest mixes yet:

  • 🐙 A psychic octopus predicts the election and leaves oceanographers questioning their degrees.

  • 🌐 The Dead Internet Theory crawls back from the digital grave.

  • 🔮 The 2025 Dystopia Forecast — because apparently we needed more things to worry about.

  • 🍲 A cook is arrested for stealing “secret recipes” from his own restaurant.

  • 📞 An inmate pretends to be a judge and tries to call the jail to free his buddy.

  • 🛁 A man breaks into a home, takes a drunken bath, and refuses to leave, boasting a blood alcohol level that could strip paint.

  • ✨ Strange lights return over the Nevada desert (of course they do).

  • 👣 Ghost Soldiers appear again on the Appalachian Trail.

  • 🦍 Bigfoot DNA from Oregon heads for testing.

  • 🪬 A Roman cursed tablet surfaces in Bath, England.

  • 💥 Sky quakes shake the Eastern U.S. — but scientists are still shrugging.

Every story comes with full breakdowns, deep-dive details, and John’s signature sarcastic takes, including the now-iconic response to the bathtub bandit:

“Somewhere there’s a mugshot of this guy in a towel looking like a criminally hydrated Buddha.”

If you love bizarre headlines, haunted forests, glitch-in-the-matrix moments, and criminals who should honestly have to pass a sobriety test before attempting a crime — this episode is for you.

📣 Calls to Action

If you enjoy the show, keep the chaos alive:

👍 Like the episode
⭐ Leave a review
🔔 Tap the bell / follow button
📧 Send questions, kudos, case suggestions, or weird stories → info@darkdialogue.com
🌐 Visit the website → www.darkdialogue.com
🤝 Join the Dark Dialogue Collective — our boots-on-the-ground research & support community
🕯️ Adopt-a-Victim and help uncover answers in real unsolved cases
❤️ Support the show on Patreon, Ko-fi, or Substack for bonus episodes, extended case files, and behind-the-scenes content

★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

What is Dark Dialogue: Shadow Chat Sessions?

Shadow Chat Sessions is the off-the-record side of the Dark Dialogue network—where weird headlines, conspiracies, paranormal stories, and truly ridiculous criminals collide.

Hosted by John and Angela, each episode dives into strange news, internet rabbit holes, cryptids, hauntings, and the kind of criminal behavior that makes no sense at all—delivered with sarcastic commentary and zero restraint.

From bizarre real-world stories to eerie legends and unexplained mysteries, Shadow Chat Sessions explores the corners of the world that are too strange to ignore.

If you’re here for dark humor, absurdity, and the occasional conspiracy spiral, this is where things go off the rails.

John: Well, hello and welcome
to another episode of Dark

Dialogue Shout chat sessions.

I am your host, John.

And I'm Angelo.

And this is the show where we just
talk about a whole bunch of shit.

Dumb shit.

Weird shit.

Strange shit.

Dip shits.

All the shits.

Yeah.

And we just kinda.

Let our hair down and have a good
time and talk about a bunch of shit

that doesn't really mean anything,
but it sure is fun to talk about.

Angela: We've yet to talk about Jack shit.

John: We haven't talked
about Jack shit yet.

We should probably get that
shit into the mix, right?

I agree.

What's wrong with us?

So Angela, how's it going tonight?

Doing well.

Doing

Angela: well in yourself?

John: Good.

I'm doing really good.

Just come off a heavy
episode like we always do.

Yep.

So.

I'm ready to have a little bit of
fun and talk about a bunch of shit.

Yeah, I don't know.

It was weird and strange and funny and
ridiculous and make fun of some people

and kinda have a little bit of fun.

So you ready to get started?

Yep.

Alright.

We've got our strange headline segment.

Good.

Octopus predicts election outcome
leaves oceanographers speechless.

Angela: What

John: an octopus at a California
research facility made headlines after

seemingly predicting the results of a
major election by choosing be between.

Two labeled shells when the
winner was officially announced.

Days later, the accuracy stunned
researchers and terrified political

analysts looking for polling alternatives.

The details.

Marine biologists at the Monterey
Bay Aquarium have been studying

cephalopod intelligence when
one of their Pacific octopuses.

I guess that's the answer to the question.

Nicknamed Ollie, the Oracle
began displaying an unusual

preference for interacting
with certain symbols on a whim.

Researchers presented Ollie
with two shells, one marked

for each political candidate.

Recorded the octopus
dragging one into its den.

When the election results mirrored
Ollie's choice, the team laughed

it off as a, as a coincidence, but.

When the animal repeated the
feat for a local referendum

and a runoff word spread fast.

Soon, news crews, gamblers, and online
conspiracy theorists were all demanding.

Ollie's endorsement experts
insist it's just probability and

reinforcement behavior, but social
media has already declared Ollie.

The new Paul, the octopus reviving
memories of the 2010 World Cup

malus, who predicted soccer
outcomes with eerie precision.

Now the aquarium is flooded with mail
half fan half fan letters, half demands

for Ali to be consulted for 2028.

My take.

So we have officially hit the point
where an octopus is where an octopus

is more trustworthy than a pollster.

Imagine CNN calling.

We're live from the aquarium where
Ollie's moving towards shale number two.

Oh, he's ink the tank folks hits
a landslide at this rate, the next

debate will be moderated by a squid

Angela: because 50 50 chance.

Doesn't factor in here at all.

John: Not at all.

So if Ollie ran for office, would
voters even notice the difference?

Angela: No.

John: I think I'd probably vote for
him over most of the politicians.

Angela: Ollie?

John: Yeah.

Ollie For President

Angela: Long Live, Ollie.

John: So should we replace
political polling with Marine Life

and see if the accuracy improves?

Let's try it.

It cannot get any worse.

I would like

Angela: to test him

John: with

Angela: four shells though,
and not be a 50 50 chance.

John: I agree.

But.

I still think he would be more freaking
more correct than the pollsters.

I haven't seen a poll that was
anywhere near believable in so

long, I can't even remember it.

So would eating calamari after this
be considered election interference?

Angela: Yes.

John: You think so?

Yeah.

I'm gonna have to take the chance
'cause I really like calamari.

Angela: So does my son.

John: So you ready for the conspiracy

Angela: corner?

Sure thing.

John: Alright.

The dead internet theory.

This one was interesting.

Have you ever heard about this?

Angela: No.

John: It's, it's, it

Angela: happened to us
yesterday for a time.

John: Yeah, and I dunno, I dunno.

So a growing number of online users
believe that most of the internet,

including news videos and even social
media interactions, is now controlled by

AI generated content and fake personas.

The dead internet theory suggests
that sometime between 2016 and

2020, the organic human-driven web
quietly died according to proponents.

What remains is a massive simulation
maintained by corporations and government.

They claim that the majority of
posts, comments, and even users on

platforms like X and Reddit are bots
trained to steer opinion, generate

profit, or manipulate engagement.

One cornerstone example, identical
comments and emojis appearing

simultaneously across unrelated accounts.

Researchers counter that these patterns
stem from algorithmic content recycling.

But believers argue that AI
has surpassed detection and now

controls discourse entirely.

Some even point to deep fake
influencers, clone voices, and

synthetic news anchors as proof.

The web itself has become self-sustaining.

A ghost town filled with digital
echoes pretending to be people.

My take if this theory is true.

I guess I've been arguing with AI
about barbecue recipes for years,

which actually explains quite a bit.

Maybe the bots just like dry ribs, but
honestly, if 80% of the web is fake, then

at least it explains why everyone suddenly
talks like SE, like an SEO consultant.

Angela: I, you've been arguing
with AI for a long time, John.

Yes, I have.

John: Yes, I

Angela: have.

It's just now starting to argue back.

John: Well, it's been arguing back for
a while too, because it told me that

if I didn't stop using the F word,
that it wasn't gonna tell me anymore.

Angela: Well, and I'm sorry,

John: but I mean, what
do you think about this?

I think it might be true.

It might be true.

Angela: I mean.

I think

John: it might

Angela: be true.

Just kind of feel like saying and because
yeah, what whatcha gonna do about it, and

John: I know I've been saying it's
Skynet for years and you, you people

wait and see, man, it's Skynet.

So would AI trolls still
count as free speech?

Angela: That's a good question.

John: The answer is an
unequivocal hell no.

No way.

Angela: Because an iRobot,
they're not allowed to have.

Robots aren't allowed to have feelings.

John: Yeah.

The three rules, and we know
how well that worked out.

Angela: That's true.

Listen to me live with

John: the movies.

So how would you even prove that
you're real in a fake internet?

Oh, you

Angela: know, it's dragging the puzzle
piece to fix the picture or identifying.

All of the pictures
with a bicycle in it, or

John: just until

Angela: we tell we're we're

John: real or just clicking the little
thing that says, I'm not a robot.

Yeah.

Like AI could never figure that one out.

Figure that out.

So if the bots are doing all of the
posting, can they start paying for

the subscriptions to They should.

Damn right.

They should.

But I, I, in all honesty, before we
leave this story, I, I mean, we've said

it before, all of this bullshit content
that gets posted on Facebook and all

this crap, you can't believe anything.

No.

It, and I gotta wonder how much of
it is just all phony fake AI crap.

Angela: It's so bad, so bad now.

They're not even trying
to do a good job recently.

John: No, it's terrible.

Yeah.

It's like sending a picture
that's taken in downtown Tokyo and

saying, me driving through Wyoming.

Angela: Yeah.

John: And you're like, uh, yeah.

I mean this uhhuh, this is so dumb.

It's not even worth commenting on

Angela: all of the
octopus lives in Wyoming.

Lane isn't.

Yeah.

AI can make that happen.

John: Yeah, it's ridiculous.

You ready for the Reddit rabbit hole?

Angela: Is it AI or is it real?

John: The is Reddit probably half ai.

It doesn't mean that the red rabbit
hole isn't entertaining though.

Angela: Entertain me.

John: The 2025 Dystopia Forecast.

A viral Reddit mega thread
invited users to predict what

everyday life would look like.

If 2025 became the first year of
collapse, the results were equal, equal

parts terrifying and darkly hilarious.

Started in early October
on our future fears.

The thread asks, what will the average
day look like when things finally break?

Tens of tens of thousands of users
chimed in constructing an eerily detailed

shared universe post described energy.

Rationing neighborhood barter systems
and wifi prayer circles for when the

power flickered back on one top comment.

Imagine TikTok influencers still filming
Apocalypse Hall videos, surviving the

grid crash, but make it aesthetic.

Another described nationalized door
pass, DoorDash, where delivery drivers

operate on horseback, the scariest part.

A few predictions.

Eely match current headlines,
food price spikes, drone

patrols, and corporate run towns.

The thread has.

Since become a living timeline of internet
anxiety with new users returning daily

to add updates and forecast corrections,
many say reading, it feels like

watching the future argue with itself.

My take, honestly, half those predictions
sound like Wyoming on a windy day,

but hey, at least when the world ends,
Reddit will still be there arguing

about whatever water filters or sarcasm
are the better survival tour tool.

Angela: Apocalypse hacks,

John: apocalypse Hacks.

Yeah.

So if Reddit survived the apocalypse,
would Karma points still matter?

Angela: It's, it's just like the show, the
games made up and the points don't matter.

John: Exactly.

I mean.

Yeah, I, I seriously doubt, like
if, if it all went to hell, if it

was the apocalypse, I doubt the
internet would still be operating.

Just saying, yeah, but

Angela: because you told me yesterday
you have to scream loud enough

for me to hear you, to run, hide

John: exactly what we were talking about.

If there's a EMP large enough to
wipe out the power grid, then how

would I let you know that it's.

It's time.

It's time die.

You can't find me minute,

but who's running the
wifi prayer circle anyway.

And are there snacks?

Angela: Probably my mom.

Probably my mom and, and
sure, I'll make snacks.

Why not?

John: So is it still looting if
you're just liberating content

from an influencer's bunker?

No.

No, I, I don't think so either.

Angela: Commandeering, remember a hundred

John: percent the pirate days?

Yeah, exactly.

Yes.

Alright,

Angela: so

John: we ready for the dip Shits diary

Angela: always.

John: It's kind of my favorite
section, not waiting for

Angela: the day.

I'm in there.

I'm just in there.

Yeah, you're

John: not allowed to go in there.

Angela: I'm just really waiting for the
day where you're like, dip shit diaries.

We're talking about you

John: dip shit.

Diary.

All right.

Dip shit.

Diary number one, cook.

Arrested for stealing
restaurants secret recipes.

A fired Missouri chef returned
to his old restaurant to steal

its handwritten dessert Recipes.

Then Bragg online about
having the real formula.

Police say.

The man recently terminated for
insubordination, snuck back into

the closed bistro one night, broke
into the manager's office and

took the laminated recipe sheets.

He then posted a photo
of his victory cookie.

On social media complete
with the restaurant's logo

reflected in the mixing bowl.

Detectives tracked the image metadata
and arrested him within 48 hours.

The restaurant released a statement
saying their quote, secret recipes.

We're actually copied from Pinterest.

Anyway, my take this man risked,
gel for a dessert that probably

starts with box pudding mix.

Honestly, the only secret
ingredient here was stupidity.

Angela: Some Italian grandmas pissed.

So

John: I mean, what?

Come on.

Angela: I know.

John: So should recipe theft be
punished or just roasted publicly?

Well.

Bull.

I mean, in all honesty, if a restaurant
has a truly secret recipe and they do,

man, there's like, that's, they do.

Like if you steal the Cheesecake
Factories, cheesecake recipe

or like the Olive Gardens
Breadstick recipe or whatever.

Like, I mean that is,
that's a huge felony.

The value of that is well
into felony territory.

Angela: But there's a website
out there, copycat.com.

Copycat recipes.com, or it's always,
you can always find it on there.

John: Oh, yeah.

And you can find, I mean, you
know, they do the same thing.

They like basically, you
know, reverse engineer it.

Yeah.

And to make it taste.

Pretty much exactly the same, you know?

And that's, and that's not
the, that's not a thing.

But to actually take and steal
the actual recipe is all I'm

saying is the value of that Yeah.

Is well into felony territory.

What's the dumbest crime worth calling?

Worth?

Calling 9 1 1 for recipe

Angela: theft, recipe theft.

John: I mean,

Angela: I don't know.

John: I don't, I think it's like
the, the best one, and I know

I've mentioned this before, but.

And I've heard a couple of these, but the
best 9 1 1 calls are the ones that people

get stoned and they think they're dying.

Hi, and they call 9 1 1 because
they're certain they're gonna die.

Those are the best ones.

Angela: I'm floating out
of the window right now.

John: So would Gordon, he's day

Angela: balloon.

John: Would Gordon Ramsey call
this criminally under baked?

Angela: Gordon Ramsey would definitely
have something to say about this

and I would love to hear it.

John: Oh yeah, I'm sure he would.

I think that I've watched like a kitchen
nightmares where um Oh, I know I have.

And the dudes were like, we won't
show recipes with our cooks.

And he's like.

What

Angela: did I cookie?

I know.

John: Yeah.

Angela: I love Gordon Ramsey.

John: Yeah, he's awesome.

And he's awesome.

And John Taffer that
does the Bar Rescue one.

He's, he's cool too.

I like it when they go in and yell at him.

Call him dumb.

And I mean, it's probably most trait in

Angela: the end.

John: They fix everything I know.

All right.

Dip shit.

Diary number two.

Inmate pretends to be Judge calls
the jail to free his friend.

A Louisiana man, imperson.

This is a bit of a, so bear Louisiana man.

Impersonated a local judge.

Over the phone to spring
his buddy from jail.

The scheme On April 16th, Saint Romaine
called the jail while posing as a

local judge and arranged for the bond
of inmate demon, Lynn Dai Sr. To be

changed to a released on recognizance
order, which requires no cash bail.

Della Hue wa, who was being held
on an aggravated burglary charge

was subsequently released in June.

The fraud was not discovered
until July 17th when Della

Hue appeared for a court date.

He was immediately rearrested and
returned to Cal Kasu Correctional Center.

Undeterred St. Romaine called
the jail two more times in July.

Again, impersonating a judge
in an unsuccessful attempt to

arrange for Della Hu's release.

These calls prompted detectives
to launch an investigation.

St. Romaine was arrested on September
9th on an unrelated warrant.

He was then charged with
false impersonation, assisting

escape, attempted simple escape.

And injuring public records
for his role in the scheme.

The Ka Casu Parish Sheriff's Office
stated that while it is not unusual

for judges to call in bond reductions
over the phone, the situation

occurred due to a quote, honest
error and a quote, lack of training.

The department announced the new policies
have been implemented to ensure this

type of situation does not happen again.

My take.

If you're going to impersonate
a judge, maybe Google how

to pronounce the name first.

It's like faking a doctor's note
and signing it, Dr. Mc medicine.

So, and I guess they missed putting
that in there, but that's how they knew

in July when he called, 'cause he, he
like mispronounced, um, recognizance.

Angela: Oh,

John: like he couldn't, he couldn't
pronounce it correctly, and

that's when they were like, uh,
we don't think you're a judge.

Because he is like, yeah, I, I want
him released on his own recognition.

So,

oh my goodness.

I mean, the stunning
part to me, honestly, is.

When they say it's not unusual for
a judge to call and what, yeah.

How is that not unusual?

How is that not impossible?

Yeah.

That you don't have legal that's going

Angela: through a bunch
of checks and balances.

Are

John: you kidding me?

Yeah.

You don't have legal paperwork in hand?

Yeah.

Before you release somebody.

Angela: Yeah.

Like.

John: I mean, I cannot get a checking
account without shit being notarized.

I mean, are you kidding me?

We can let people outta
jail on a phone call

Angela: bill, prove your address.

Yes.

And

John: you let somebody outta
jail on a phone call, like

Angela: even renew your driver's
license without all that.

John: If this shit is real, why isn't
somebody doing this all the time?

Angela: I,

John: I mean, this is the
easiest way to escape jail ever.

Just call and say, oh,
this is the judge Tony Mo.

Angela: Just make sure you can
pronounce all your words first.

John: I mean, I, I was
stunned when I read that.

Wow.

When the cop was like, well,
it's not really that unusual.

I'm like, what?

How, how can this not be unusual?

How.

Angela: I think that's
something we need to change.

John: So it really brings
up my first question.

And how often does this actually work?

I don't.

Well, it worked once the dude got out.

I know, but how often do we not know about

Angela: I?

I don't like that.

John: Would you trust any judge who says.

Yeah, bro.

Just let him go.

Angela: Yeah, bro.

Bro,

John: bro.

Yeah, bro.

Let him go.

Angela: Yeah.

Six, seven, let him go.

John: Should Louisiana add common
sense to sentencing guidelines

just or for on job applications?

I

Angela: mean, come on.

And it was an inmate, so
was it not a recorded call?

John: No, I mean, the
judge called like the.

The office, you know, like the sheriff's
office to speak to the sheriff.

He didn't call the inmate.

He called like the, he called
the facility and was like, yeah,

I've decided to change my mind.

I just never heard of this shit before.

Oh,

Angela: I know.

I, I don't like it.

Where is that?

John: In Louisiana?

Louisiana.

I don't, I don't like it.

I, I, I got exactly,
I got nothing on this.

I, if it happens ever, like if this is
a common thing, we got some work to do

on our justice system because, well,

Angela: we already did, but

John: a lot more now dip shit.

Diary number three, Nana rested
after falling asleep in bathtub.

A man was arrested Friday night for
allegedly trespassing after falling asleep

in a bathtub in someone else's house.

MPD said the 19-year-old suspect
wandered into a woman's home and

bedroom while she was sleeping.

According to authorities, she
woke up and told the man to leave,

but he then went to her bathroom
and fell asleep in the bathtub.

She called the police and they arrived
at her house in the 500 block of Mifflin

Street just before 10:00 PM officials
said, police said that they found the

suspect asleep, and when they woke him.

He refused to leave.

He was then, he was eventually
arrested and taken to jail

for allegedly trespassing.

Disorderly conduct,
resisting and obstructing.

MPD officers said, officers
said that his blood alcohol

concentration was found to be 0.29.

Might take, I guess, crime does pay
in self-care time somewhere there's a

mugshot of this guy in a towel looking
like a criminally hydrated Pluto.

Angela: Calgon take me away.

John: So, uh,

Angela: how good was this bathtub?

He's refusing to leave,

John: right?

No, I'm not leaving the bathtub.

Of course, I have been that drunk before.

So in

Angela: someone else's house

John: actually, yeah.

Angela: Oh, okay then yeah.

Are you sure this wasn't you?

John: I was in the bed.

Angela: Okay.

Yeah.

John: Yeah.

Angela: Alright.

John: But should breaking
and entering come with a spa

surcharge Should and Baal agreed.

So how does one explain
this to a cellmate?

So there I was

in a shootout with the police.

I dove into the bathtub.

In the bathtub.

So is this the cleanest
arrest in Florida history?

Angela: Probably.

John: I think it probably is.

Probably

Angela: scrubbing bubbles, man.

John: Absolutely.

Alright, you ready for
our weird shit section?

It gets weirder.

Weird shit.

Weird shit.

Number one, strange lights
return over Nevada Desert.

When did they leave pilots
near Nellis Air Force?

Air Force Range once again reported
shifting orbs of light, the

defied radar and flight patterns.

For three consecutive nights,
multiple pilots flying, commercial

and private routes over Southern
Nevada reported glowing orbs.

That pulses shifted colors and
darted in erratic patterns.

Air traffic controllers confirmed.

No radar signatures, no military
drills, and no storms in the area.

Videos shot by civilians show three
Amber lights forming a triangle

before fading to blue and vanishing.

Locals recall similar sightings
in the 1990s linked to black

project aircraft tests.

But this time, even retired military
pilots admitted they were baffled.

The Pentagon issued a boiler points,
a boilerplate statement, denying

involvement, fueling speculation
that either the next generation

steal project just went public or
extraterrestrials have impeccable timing.

MiTek.

Either aliens are back or Nevada just
discovered, moonlighting for the sky

somewhere, a UFO's out there thinking,
let's mess with the humans again.

Angela: Yeah.

John: So are these military
tests or celestial?

Trolls?

Angela: Trolls.

And they're just there
for the slot machines.

John: Yeah, I mean, I don't know,
you know, reading this one and

comparing it to like the men, men
lights, they're very, very similar.

Right?

And they're freaking in Australia,
they've been going on for like

a hundred years or whatever.

We've been seeing weird shit in Nevada for
at least in since like the forties, right?

Thirties and so.

I just honestly don't know what
the hell to think about this.

I think some of this shit is
probably government doing shit

that we don't know nothing about.

Yeah, and then I think some of
it is legit, unidentified shit.

We don't know.

I ain't saying aliens, I'm saying
I don't know what the hell it is.

Angela: Un that's what
the U is, is unidentified.

John: Right.

So if aliens land, do
we owe them back taxes?

No.

Oh, they owe that.

That's, I was gonna say they owe us.

Damnit.

Angela: You don't just show up.

It's,

John: you have to pay to live yours.

So should area 51 start selling tickets?

Yes.

I think they ought to freaking
let us know what the hell's in

there and put on all the rest.

Angela: Do you know how many roads.

Would be fixed.

Schools would be funded if they
would sell tickets to Area 51.

John: No shit.

Yeah.

Angela: All the programs
that could end world hunger.

Maybe I'm taking it a little too

John: far,

Angela: but

John: you can make a lot of freaking money

Angela: happening if they would
sell tickets and whatever the hell

John: they're hiding.

Yeah.

We deserve to know.

Yeah.

I don't give a shit what it is.

We deserve to know it.

Yeah, because they're not hiding some.

I.

Dates back to the forties or
whenever the shit that happened,

Angela: right?

John: You know,

Angela: I will say, you go first and
report back to me and make sure that my

anxiety can handle it, and then I'll go,

John: fair enough?

Okay.

Fair enough.

Weird shit.

Number two, the Appalachian Trail
Ghost Soldiers were cited again.

Hikers in Maryland Civil War section
reported seeing blue uniformed apparitions

marching silently through the fog.

Along the stretch near South Mountain
hikers described ghostly formations

of men in union uniforms carrying
faded muskets, marching at dusk.

Through Rolling Mist.

Witnesses claim to hear faint drumbeats
and smell gunpowder with no source.

Paranormal investigators captured
whispered EVPs saying still

marching and can't find home
Historians note that the areas.

Saw brutal skirmishes in 1862 and dozens
of unmarked burial sites remain nearby.

Rangers confirmed multiple, multiple
reports over the years, often clustered

around the anniversary of the battle.

While skeptics attribute the phenomenon
to fog, fatigue, or imagination,

even seasoned hikers, admit, the
air feels heavier there as if

the war itself never quite ended.

My take.

I'd love to see the Park
Service deal with this quote.

Please stay on the Trail,
respect Wildlife and ignore the

19th century infantry in the

Angela: don't touch.

John: First of all, your
thoughts on this one.

I hope it's true.

I mean, I gotta tell you, I,
I got a thing about visiting,

like battlefields and stuff.

Mm-hmm.

I've gone to several, you know, native
battlefields, the Battle of Little

Bighorn, the Battle of the Big Hole.

I've been to several of 'em.

I've been to Gettysburg, I've been, and.

Some of 'em, I've

Angela: been everywhere

John: and not all of them share
this, but some of them, and

one of them was Gettysburg.

It does feel.

Different there.

Mm-hmm.

The air feels different.

I don't know.

It's hard to explain.

Yeah.

I've heard that a lot of
people, I haven't been, but I've

heard it from a lot of people.

It is, and I don't, I never could
quite say, okay, this is a mental

thing where I'm just overwhelmed
thinking like, every person that died

here was an American and it's just,

Angela: yeah.

John: Overwhelming or.

But you know, I mean, with the way
that I believe with like the native

battles and stuff, I can say the
same thing about the battle of the

little Bighorn and shit like that.

You know

Angela: about to say, Custer, you've been,
I'm, I'm sure you've been, that's the,

John: that's a little bighorn.

Yeah.

I

Angela: felt weird there.

John: You felt it there?

Yeah.

See, I never have felt it there.

Angela: Not weird, bad, but like

John: heavy,

Angela: an overwhelming like emotional.

Response, which I've heard
people have felt at Alcatraz

and people have felt Yeah.

At all, you know, mes casualty areas.

John: And I can, for me, I don't fill
'em every, I don't feel it everywhere.

Like I've, I've not felt it at the battle.

A little bit horn.

Yeah.

I mean, it's very valid that you had it.

Bad

Angela: feeling.

It was just emotional,
like, this is heavy, this is

John: right.

And kind of what I'm
explaining is different.

Okay.

It's heavy, it's dark.

It's like, okay, that wasn't dark.

Yeah.

I mean, I, I don't think I would
go back to Gettysburg because.

I just didn't like how I felt.

Mm-hmm.

And I've, I've done like tons of
prison tours and most of 'em where

I like really dig 'em and stuff.

But there's been a few moundsville
prison in Moundsville, West

Virginia was one of 'em.

Mm-hmm.

Where I don't think I go back there.

It's just this dark ABB
feeling that's like.

Uhuh, something's not right here.

Like something is off.

Good, bad, indifferent.

I don't know.

I just know I don't like how I feel here.

Right.

So, I don't know.

It's weird, but

Angela: kind of wanna
go there now, but, um,

John: Moundsville.

Angela: Yeah,

John: it's a creep.

What your favorite dude?

He did a, a thing there.

Oh yeah.

And I mean, it's a
freaking creepy ass place.

It's one of the creepiest
prisons I've ever toured.

So, but do ghosts get vacation days?

Angela: No, sadly

John: I don't think so either.

So would a Civil War spirit be
horrified by modern camping gear?

Yes.

You probably are intrigued one of the two

Angela: or a little pissed,
like, we didn't get it right.

How dare they.

John: So if

Angela: you reason and such, you
just pop the thing and it heats up.

Yeah,

John: exactly.

If you salute a ghost
soldier, does he salute back?

I hope so.

Well, they should.

Angela: I mean.

You, it's respect, right?

Absolutely.

So come on.

Dammit, damnit, have to put you find a

John: point on it.

Dammit.

Alright.

Weird shit.

Number three.

Yes, Bigfoot.

Evidence from Oregon gets DNA, tested.

Angela: Don't tell me it's wrong.

John: Hair found near an old logging
camp, near an old logging camp.

Tested as quote unknown primate, DNA.

Reigniting Bigfoot Fever collected
by hikers near Mount Hood in 2023.

The reddish brown hair clumps were
sent to an independent genetics

lab, which returned the vague but
tantalizing result of un identified

primate species researchers ruled
out bear elk or human contamination.

The US Forest Service quietly reopened
an archive case from 1978 describing

similar evidence collected by a
ranger who vanished soon thereafter.

Encrypted enthusiasts flooded
the area, setting up trail cams

and plaster casting tracks.

Skeptics argue the sample was mishandled
or misread, but the timing near an uptick

in local reports has reignited the legend,
whether it's a hoax or un, an undiscovered

ape, or just a really hairy hiker.

Oregon once again finds
itself the unofficial capital

of monster anthropology.

My take.

Unknown pri.

Unknown primate.

DNA, huh?

Either we found Bigfoot or the
Oregon Zoo lost another intern.

So first of all, thoughts,

Angela: I am happy.

Yeah.

Yep.

So Bigfoot's out there, man,

John: you, you really think so.

You think I do.

You don't think somebody like took
some monkey hair or something?

And of

Angela: course they, well, I don't
know about this, but I really do

believe that bigfoot's out there.

John: Yeah, I would've to
research this a little bit more.

Is it, I mean, no, it said, I don't know.

That's, that's pretty freaking convincing.

An unidentified primate species.

So nobody got no like orangutan
hair, no shit like that.

'cause it would've come
back as an orangutan.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

So, I dunno, man, I dunno
this, maybe there's some to it.

I dig it.

So how long before Disney Plus makes
A makes this a three part special?

Angela: It's probably already out.

John: It probably definitely in the works.

So if it's Bigfoot, does he
qualify for endangered status?

Angela: He should.

He should.

I guess we don't know how many there are.

John: Well, according to.

According to Shadow Chat sessions,
there's a shit ton of them.

Yeah.

They're all over the freaking place.

So

Angela: they're, and according to
John, there has to be at least two.

John: There has to be at least two.

There has to be at least two in Oregon.

Angela: He's, maybe he's just visiting.

I, who knows?

They go on vacation too, man.

John: Yeah, I'm sure they have their
own planes, which we can't see too.

Angela: Those, those lights in Nevada.

I have figured it all out.

John: You have figured it all out

Angela: on mic drop.

I'm done.

John: So should the Forest Service
issue him a driver's license

Angela: by now?

Probably.

I. But I, I think he has to take the test
like the rest of us, and I want three

forms of proof of residence notarized.

John: Well, he is in Oregon.

They don't count any of that shit.

You just show up and get a
freaking driver's license.

Have you not been watching the news?

All these illegals that are freaking
crashing trucks all over the place.

Angela: Oh,

John: I'm sure Bigfoot can get a
driver's license in California.

Probably everybody else can.

All right.

Weird shit.

Number four, the Roman Curse
tablet unearthed in Bath, England.

Archeologists decoded a 1700
year old curse inscribed on

lead, targeting the thief of some
bath towels during excavations.

Near the ancient Roman baths of Aqua
Solis, researchers discovered a rolled

lead tablet inscribed in Latin once
unrolled it revealed a handwritten plea

to the Goddess Solace Minerva quote.

May the thief who stole my
towels lose his mind in sight

until the items are returned.

Experts say such Dfi Ds.

Or curse tablets were common
personal revenge tools.

In Roman culture, citizens would write
grievances on metal, fold the sheet,

and toss it into sacred springs, hoping
the deity would handle customer service.

The discovery offers a glimpse
into daily Roman life and human

pettiness across the millennials.

Apparently people have been losing
their minds over missing towels

since before plumbing my take.

Some guy's eternal soul is
roasting over stolen towels.

The Romans invented Yelp reviews,
just meaner and incursive.

Angela: What was the thread count

John: of the towels?

Yeah.

Who knows?

Probably like 12.

It was the Romans.

I

Angela: know.

I have, uh, new plans for the weekend.

I shall be acquiring a bunch of metal.

I have a list Right.

Suit

John: and throwing them
out to in the water list.

Yeah, there you go.

Angela: I'm just gonna go throw
'em in the springs at Thermopolis

and we'll just see what happens.

Right on.

John: So what's the Pettiest
thing worth cursing over?

Angela: I'm pretty sure it's towels.

John: You think so?

Angela: Yeah.

Well, I don't know.

You felt like you had a. A thing there?

John: No, you, you're
the one with the list.

Oh.

So I'm just wondering.

Angela: No, my list is not pandemic.

John: No.

Angela: No.

John: So would modern
curses be written on Yelp?

Angela: Yeah.

But then where do you throw 'em?

John: I don't know.

The AI world, I guess AI does it.

And is there a god of lost baths?

Apparently, yeah.

What was the name?

Uh, the name was Goddess Solis Minerva.

Angela: Solis Minerva.

The god of lo goddess of lost BALs.

John: Yeah, apparently.

All right.

All right.

Well, weird shit.

Number five, sky quakes heard
across the eastern United States.

Residents from Maine to Maryland reported
deafening booms with no visible cause.

Starting early Tuesday morning, thousands
of residents across New England and the

Mid-Atlantic called emergency services.

After hearing thunderous explosions
that rattled windows and set off

alarms, seismographs showed no quake
activity and meteorologists ruled

out thunder meteors or sonic booms.

Witnesses describe the sound as a quote.

A cannon fired from the clouds.

The National Weather Service suggested
atmospheric pressure shifts might cause

sound waves to travel unusually far,
but offered no definitive explanation.

Theories range from secret military
flights to collapsing air pockets, or if

you ask Reddit, interdimensional rifts.

Whatever it was, people agreed on
one thing, it was loud enough to make

the entire East coast collectively
look up and say, well, that's

concerning my take every year.

It's the same.

Someone breaks the sky again.

Maybe it's just aliens
drag racing above Delaware.

Angela: Yeah.

John: So what's louder sky quicks
or your neighbor's leaf blower.

Angela: I'm gonna go with
Sky Quakes for 200, Alex.

John: I

Angela: mean,

John: it sounds like a sonic boom.

Angela: Yeah, and those,

John: but I can't explain how it
could be heard over that far of a

distance because I, I mean, I've heard
'em before, but never states away.

Angela: I gotta say, I kind of miss them.

John: Yeah,

Angela: I do.

Like I heard 'em a lot in
childhood and I kind of miss 'em.

John: Yeah, you don't
hear 'em as much anymore.

Angela: It's illegal now, isn't it?

Yeah.

Yeah.

John: But I don't know, man.

I got nothing on this.

I have no freaking clue
what the hell it is.

No, shouldn't NASA start a,
whoops, my atmosphere's hotline.

Angela: NASA should turn
the base down, apparently.

John: Apparently.

Angela: Yeah.

John: I mean, there's a lot
of this weird shit that.

I honestly think we need answers too.

Mm-hmm.

Like, I know I make fun of this stuff, but
at the end of the day, like what is it?

We should know what the
answer is to this shit.

And if the government's involved,
they need to suck it up and tell us.

And if they're not, that's even more
freaking concerning and we need to

know what's causing a lot of this shit.

Yeah.

The freaking TAUs hum.

The freaking weird shit in
Washington that we talked about.

The sonic booms in the sky,
the all the weird shit.

We need to know about it.

Angela: John wants answers.

John: Damn straight.

I do.

So if the sky explodes, but you film
it vertically, does it still count?

Angela: Spoof a tree
falls in a forest, right?

Right.

Who's counting.

John: Indeed who is counting, but
I do know one thing that is all

that I put together for us tonight.

So what do you have to
add to tonight's episode?

Angela: I did not bring
anything to the table.

No, no I didn't.

Oh, you

John: never do.

Angela: I know.

I terrible.

John: Well, I does

Angela: all,

John: I just show

Angela: up and talk.

John: If you had nothing
to add, then I guess that.

I will say to our listeners, thank
you for joining us for another

wacky and fun episode of Dark
Dialogue Shadow Chat Sessions.

If you like what we do and how we do
it, feel free to give us your support

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and if that's all there is to
say, that's it for tonight.

Angela: That's all there is to say.

Stay safe, everybody.