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Happening in Upland is your weekly rundown of what’s going on around town—local news, community events, public safety updates, new restaurants, development, weather, schools, and the stuff Upland residents actually talk about.
Delivered with humor, honesty, and a very local point of view, this isn’t stiff broadcast news. It’s real, relevant information with personality. If you live in Upland or anywhere nearby in the Inland Empire, this is your weekly shortcut to staying in the loop.
MARK: Welcome to 'Happening in Upland,' the only podcast that loves this city almost as much as we hate the traffic on Euclid. I'm Mark, your voice of reason and occasional disappointment, joined by the ever-optimistic, yet suspiciously cynical, Joleen.
JOLEEN: Optimistic is a strong word, Mark. I'm more like a realist who's been hit by too many red lights at Foothill. It's Monday, March 23rd, 2026, and if you're listening to this while stuck in construction, you're exactly where you're supposed to be. How the fuck are you today?
MARK: I'm composed, which is a nice way of saying I've accepted the chaos. We've got a lot to get through today. If you want to reach us with your complaints about the local school board or just to tell us we're assholes, email us at upland@thehappeningnetwork.com. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and comment, because apparently, that's how we feed the algorithm monster.
JOLEEN: Feed the beast, people. Feed it. Before we get into the news, can we talk about how it's basically summer already? I stepped outside this morning and immediately regretted every life choice that didn't involve a personal fan and a gallon of iced tea. It's supposed to hit 86 degrees today. In March. Because the planet is clearly doing great.
MARK: It's the Upland experience. You get three days of spring, and then the sun decides to try and murder us. But speaking of things that are heating up, we've got a big one tomorrow. The 2026 State of the City address is happening Tuesday, March 24th. It's being hosted by the Chamber of Commerce, and this year they're doing it at Kahramana Restaurant.
JOLEEN: Nothing says 'serious municipal business' like a side of hummus and some kebabs. I mean, I love Kahramana, but having the Mayor talk about the budget while people are trying to eat their weight in Mediterranean food is a choice. A delicious choice, but a choice nonetheless. What are they even going to talk about? More ways to tear up the streets?
MARK: They're calling it an evening of insight and connection. Translation: a lot of suits standing around talking about growth while we all wonder when the hell Foothill is actually going to be finished. Burrtec is the presenting sponsor, so expect plenty of talk about trash. Literally and figuratively.
JOLEEN: Burrtec being there is perfect. Maybe they can pick up some of the political promises while they're at it. But honestly, Kahramana is a legit spot. If you're going to be bored by a speech, at least you're doing it in a place with a decent atmosphere. It starts at 5 p.m. for the social hour, and the program begins at 6. Reservations were required, so if you didn't get one, you'll just have to wait for our sarcastic summary next week.
MARK: I'll be there, Joleen. Mostly for the food. I'll just nod whenever I hear the word 'rehabilitation' or 'infrastructure.' It's a survival tactic. But moving on to something actually impressive, Upland High School just got a massive gold star. They were officially named a 2026 California Distinguished School as of late last week.
JOLEEN: Wait, really? A 'Distinguished School'? Is that like being the 'least messy' kid in a frat house? I'm kidding, that's actually huge. They got it for closing the achievement gap for underserved students. That's a hell of an accomplishment for the Highlanders. I guess the kids are actually learning something between all the TikTok dances and existential dread.
MARK: The state gives this to schools that show excellent academic outcomes or narrow the gap between student groups. Upland High has been leaning hard into their Career Pathways and student support programs. They'll be honored at an awards ceremony at the Disneyland Hotel in April. I bet the principal is just thrilled he gets a trip to Anaheim out of it.
JOLEEN: He better get a churro on the district's dime. But seriously, it's nice to see some positive news for the school district. Usually, it's just parents yelling at board meetings about books or whatever the hell else is offending people this week. To have UHS recognized on a state level means someone is doing their job right. Good job, you little overachievers.
MARK: It's a nice win. Now, if we could just get that same level of distinction for our local drivers, we'd be set. Speaking of people who shouldn't have licenses, the crime reports this week are a special kind of stupid. We've had a string of high-speed chases across the Inland Empire, including one that ended right here in Upland with a car basically disintegrating.
JOLEEN: Oh, you mean the one where the kids were fleeing in a stolen car and hit a pole? That shit is terrifying. One of them had a loaded gun, and they were only 17. What the hell happened to just sneaking out to buy a Slurpee? Now it's grand theft auto and felony evasion before you can even vote. It's a damn shame.
MARK: It's a pattern. These high-speed pursuits are becoming a weekly tradition. We also had a guy caught with a nitrous oxide tank in his passenger seat after a hit-and-run. Because nothing says 'safe driving' like huffing gas while trying to outrun the cops. He didn't even have insurance or a license. Typical.
JOLEEN: It's the nitrous that really gets me. Like, were you planning on doing some street racing like a budget Vin Diesel, or were you just trying to numb the pain of living in the 909? Either way, you're a dickhead for putting everyone else at risk. Stay safe out there, people. Upland isn't exactly Gotham City, but the drivers are definitely auditioning for the role of Joker.
MARK: And then there's the mail theft. It's tax season, so the assholes are out in force. If you're still using your street-side mailbox for sensitive shit, you're basically giving a gift to the porch pirates and identity thieves. Get a locked box or take it to the post office. It's 2026, stop acting like we live in a pastoral village where everyone's honest.
JOLEEN: Seriously. I saw a guy the other day just casually walking down the street checking handles. He didn't even look like he was trying to hide it. I almost yelled at him, but then I remembered I don't want to get stabbed over a bill from Southern California Edison. Let's pivot to food before I get too pissed off.
MARK: Let's talk about Kahramana. Since the State of the City is being held there, I figured I should actually try the food. It's over on West Foothill. They do Iraqi and Mediterranean cuisine. I had the lamb chops last time, and I've gotta say, they're better than most things you'll find on this side of the county line.
JOLEEN: The lamb chops are solid, but the rice is the real star. It's like they infused every grain with a tiny bit of happiness. It's also one of those places where the hospitality actually feels genuine. You don't feel like they're just trying to flip the table for the next group of dickheads. It's a great spot for a community event, even if it's for something as dry as a mayoral speech.
MARK: It's a big space too. Perfect for pretending to listen to your neighbor while you're actually eyeing the last piece of pita. If you haven't been there, you're missing out on some of the best flavors in Upland. It's definitely a 'Hidden Gem' that isn't really hidden anymore because everyone's realized how good it is.
JOLEEN: And if you're looking for something sweet afterward, Sunright Tea Studio is still the place for boba. I'm obsessed with their mochi topping. It's like drinking a cloud that's also a snack. They tell you to shake it 17 times. I usually stop at ten because I'm lazy and I want my sugar immediately.
MARK: Seventeen times is a very specific instruction. It's like they're trying to give us a workout before we consume five hundred calories of liquid gold. But hey, it works. The packaging is cute too. It's the little things that keep us from falling into total despair.
JOLEEN: It really is. Now, let's talk sports. Upland High's schedule is packed this week. Today, the Varsity Softball team is taking on Aquinas at 3:30. It's a home game, so go support the girls. They've been having a rough patch lately, losing a tight one to South Hills last week, so they need the energy.
MARK: Softball is a big deal around here. It's intense. I went to a game once and the parents were more aggressive than the players. One mom was basically calling the umpire names that would make a sailor blush. I loved it. It was the most excitement I've had in months.
JOLEEN: That sounds about right. We've also got Boys Tennis and Golf against Rancho Cucamonga this afternoon. It's the classic rivalry. Nothing feels better than beating Rancho. It's like the little brother finally getting a punch in. Plus, Boys Volleyball is playing Damien later today. Damien is always tough, so our boys better have their shit together.
MARK: The volleyball team has been struggling a bit too, sitting at three and eight. They need a turnaround. Maybe the 'Distinguished School' energy will rub off on them. If they play like their GPA depends on it, they might actually stand a chance.
JOLEEN: We've also got youth sports kicking off. i9 Sports is starting their spring basketball and volleyball leagues at the Upland High gym on March 29th. It's for kids ages four to fourteen. If you want to tire your kids out so they actually go to sleep at a decent hour, this is your chance. No tryouts, no drafts, just pure chaos on the court.
MARK: I love youth sports because it's the only time you can watch children run in circles for an hour and call it a game. It's adorable until they start crying because they didn't get the orange slice they were promised. But hey, it keeps them off the streets and away from the high-speed chases we talked about earlier.
JOLEEN: Exactly. Keep them busy or they'll be huffing nitrous in a stolen BMW by the time they're sixteen. Speaking of busy, our weekend guide for this coming weekend is actually looking pretty good. On Saturday, March 28th, there's a 'Men's Gathering' in the morning and a 'Brunch After Dark' event at Ace's Corner Lounge later that night.
MARK: Brunch After Dark. Isn't that just called dinner? Or is it like breakfast food served while a DJ plays heavy bass? I'm intrigued. Steven G is performing live. I'm too old to know who that is, but the kids seem to love it. It's at 9 p.m., which is way past my bedtime, but for those of you with a social life, it sounds like a blast.
JOLEEN: Ace's is a vibe. It's good to see some nightlife that isn't just a dive bar with a sticky floor. And if you're more into plants than performers, the San Dimas Canyon Nature Center is doing a 'Gardening Day' on Saturday morning. It's free, and you can learn how not to kill your succulents. Lord knows I need that.
MARK: I've killed plastic plants, Joleen. My thumb is the opposite of green. It's basically a scorched-earth policy in my backyard. But for the rest of the community, don't forget the Farmers Market is still every Saturday in Historic Downtown. It's from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. Get your honey, your fresh eggs, and your artisan bread that costs more than a tank of gas.
JOLEEN: That bread is worth it though. There's also the Wistaria Festival shuttle tickets for sale for this Saturday. If you've never been to the Wistaria Festival in Sierra Madre, it's worth the short drive. It's the world's largest blossoming plant. It's basically a giant purple monster that smells like heaven. Very Instagrammable if you're into that sort of thing.
MARK: It's a plant. People get very excited about a plant. I don't get it, but I respect the commitment. Now, let's talk weather, because it's going to be a weird week. Today we're hitting 86 degrees. Mostly sunny, pleasantly warm, or as I like to call it, 'uncomfortably sweaty.' Tomorrow is even worse, peaking around 90.
JOLEEN: Ugh, gross. But then it cools down. By Wednesday and Thursday, we're back in the low 80s, and by next Monday, the 30th, we're actually looking at a chance of showers. It's like the sky can't make up its mind. Do I wear a sweater? Do I wear a tank top? Do I just stay inside and cry? The answer is always yes.
MARK: It's the Santa Ana winds playing games with our heads. We'll have clear skies for most of the week, especially on the 29th, which is predicted to be the clearest day of the month. So if you're planning on doing that gardening or going to the market, Sunday is the day to do it before the rain potentially hits on Monday.
JOLEEN: Just watch out for the wind. Upland winds are no joke. I saw a trash can fly down the street like it was trying to make a break for the border. And that wind usually brings the heat. It's that dry, dusty air that makes your eyes feel like they're full of sand. Welcome to the IE, folks. It's a desert with a Starbucks on every corner.
MARK: And on those corners, you'll find construction. Let's talk about the eternal nightmare that is our road system. The 13.2 million dollar Foothill Boulevard rehabilitation project is still grinding along. They're working from Benson to Euclid, and the signs say it won't be finished until August 2026.
JOLEEN: August? That's forever! By the time they're done, we'll probably have flying cars and won't even need the damn pavement. They're doing water pipelines, landscaping, and bike lanes. I haven't seen a single person on a bike on Foothill in three years, but hey, maybe once the lanes are 'enhanced' with a million dollars of paint, they'll show up.
MARK: It's all about 'safety and smoother traffic flow,' which is hilarious because the construction makes the traffic anything but smooth. They're also doing flashing beacons on 11th Street and work on Alpine, Vernon, and Palm. If your commute involves any of those, I suggest you leave forty minutes early and bring a lot of patience. Or just a very loud horn.
JOLEEN: The horn is my primary mode of communication. I also love how they call it 'rehabilitation.' It makes the road sound like it's in a twelve-step program. 'Hi, I'm Foothill, and I've been full of potholes for ten years.' 'Hi, Foothill!' It's just a mess. And don't even get me started on the I-10 Express Lanes. That project is like a bad relationship that just won't end.
MARK: They've shifted the lanes and reduced the speed to 55, but everyone is still doing 80 because we're all assholes. Just be careful around the work crews. They're just trying to do their jobs without getting clipped by someone texting and driving a Tesla. It's dangerous work.
JOLEEN: It really is. Let's talk real estate, because if you're looking to buy a house in Upland right now, you better have a rich uncle or a side hustle in international diamond smuggling. The median home price is sitting at about 826,500 dollars as of this month. That's up over five percent from last year.
MARK: It's insane. We're in a seller's market, which means there are way more people looking to buy than there are actual houses available. There are only about 169 homes for sale right now. If you put your house on the market, it's gone in an average of 43 days. It's competitive out there.
JOLEEN: Forty-three days? That's just enough time to pack your boxes and realize you have too much junk. And the rents aren't much better. Median rent is around 2,700 a month. It did drop a little bit month-over-month, about five percent, but it's still a huge chunk of change for the privilege of living near a major freeway and a mountain that's usually on fire.
MARK: But people still want to be here. Neighborhoods like The Colonies and Historic Downtown are still high demand. It's the 'Upland Charm.' People love the trees, the history, and the fact that we have a statuesque view of Mount Baldy. Even if we're paying a premium for it.
JOLEEN: I guess. I mean, the view is nice when the smog clears for five minutes after a rainstorm. But 826k for a three-bedroom house that hasn't been updated since 1974 is a tough pill to swallow. I'm just going to keep renting and hoping the bubble bursts, even though the experts say it won't happen anytime soon.
MARK: The experts are usually wrong, but in this case, the supply is so low that prices aren't going anywhere but up. It's the reality of Southern California. We're all just living in a very expensive theme park. Anyway, that's the bulk of the news for today. Before we wrap up, Joleen, any final cynical thoughts for the people?
JOLEEN: Just that if you're going to the State of the City tomorrow, please ask the Mayor why the light at Euclid and 11th takes five minutes to change. It's a personal vendetta of mine. Also, stay hydrated. It's going to be a hot one. Don't be that person who faints at the grocery store because they only drank coffee and spite today.
MARK: Spite is a powerful hydrator, but water is better. We're glad you're here with us. Upland is a weird, frustrating, beautiful little place, and we're happy to be your guides through the nonsense. Remember, we want to hear from you. Email us at upland@thehappeningnetwork.com with your stories, your tips, or your best insults. We read them all.
JOLEEN: Especially the insults. They keep us humble. Make sure you hit that subscribe button so you don't miss next week's episode. We'll be breaking down the State of the City and whatever other madness happens between now and then. Peace out, Upland. Try not to hit anything.
MARK: And try not to let the construction get to you. It's only temporary, even if 'temporary' means several more years. We'll catch you next time on 'Happening in Upland.' Have a great week, if you can manage it.