Subscribe
Share
Share
Embed
Wise Christians think deeply about what is beneficial for their souls and for the souls of those they love. This message from Pastor Mike Novotny attempts to do just that, suggesting wise boundaries to increase screens’ blessings and minimize screens’ curses as we seek the God who saved our souls.
The episodes are the weekly sermons from 922 Ministries (St. Peter and The CORE) of Appleton, Wisconsin.
Screens and Souls
Wk 3 - The CORE
Pastor Mike Novotny
Stop!
That's what my wife said. To me the other night, my head snapped in her direction. And I saw her eyes this big and this expression on her face.
Shocked and confused. I tried to figure out what she was yelling at me for until I looked down in my lap and saw the root cause of her concern. The bag of chocolate peanut butter cups in my lab. Not just any chocolate, peanut butter cups, the mini chocolate peanut butter cups. That according to the FDA, don't officially come out as calories and which I had just taken from the freezer. So they were perfectly chilled. Apparently, I don't remember this part. But this is what the only witness claims is that I was pounding about a serving size of those mini chocolate, peanut butter cups, every 30 to 35 seconds. And Kim watched this dietary horror show for about 90 seconds and I was a good 1200 calories in until my concerned wife looked at me with eyes as big and said, stop.
I'm not sure about you but I don't have the best boundaries when it comes to food. I love food. Mainly the foods that can kill me before I turn age 50. I love the chocolate peanut butter cups. I love the Twizzlers. Oh, the Red Vines. Sour Patch Kids, Tropical Skittles, Swedish Fish. It's like the Trinity of delicious this term either so good. That, when I get close to it, I don't eat just one. And I don't check the serving size, for the official amount of sugar calories. I just eat, and eat and eat. And eat. And also eat it. Some more I've learned after all these years that if I'm not intentional, I will do things that I really regret. Some you know what? This is like you've taken the ice cream tub that little Pines out of the freezer and you said you were just going to have a little bit but then the warmth of your hands are too melted around the edges. You can't just leave that until you ate and ate until your spoon hit the bottom of the container. It's so hard. When something is so good I'm not sure if it's the way sugar works in your brain or our own lack of self-control, but sometimes when we get too close, Even things that aren't inherently bad. Well, we can end up going too far.
And so I've kind of learned like if I'm going to take care of my body, I have to be careful what I bring into our home. And if I'm to bring that kind of stuff into our home, I can't sit down with the tub or the package. I got to take just a couple out on a plate. Because honestly, I'm the kind of guy who lacks enough self-control that if I get too close, I'm probably going to end up going too far. Now, I'm making that confession to you today because I think that phones are a lot like food. I'm not sure if it's the way that phones are organized and brilliantly designed. I'm not sure if it's the chemicals in our brain or just a common lack of self-control. But for a lot of us when we get too close to certain devices, we end up going too far. We end up looking at more things than we originally intended. We're just going to glance and look up, whatever on Google and then we got distracted by this. And then that, and then 10 minutes later, we snapped out of it. Sometimes when we get too close to these brilliantly engineered devices. We end up doing things that we never intended to. And that's why just like sugar and unhealthy Foods, I want to talk to you today about boundaries. Now, desserts not a bad thing but it can be And your screens aren't an inherently bad thing, we're not gonna have a bonfire for your phones and tablets after church. But you probably do know, and you've experienced, like I have that if we're not intentional, if we don't have good boundaries well then something that isn't inherently bad can become a bad thing in our life. So let's talk about boundaries today. Let's start with a definition. It's going to grab your pen for watching a homeowner. Write this down. Here's how I define a boundary. Boundaries are personal rules that keep you far from personal danger? I heard this idea about 15 years ago in a sermon. I'm kind of borrowing it from another Pastor. If it's not a Biblical rule, a boundary isn't like a you shall not that we find in the scriptures. It's a personal rule that you personally pick for yourself. And the reason you try to live by this rule is because it keeps you from a personal danger. Maybe you're the kind of person. And sit down with the bag of peanut butter cups and just have to. I'm not and so you might not need this rule but maybe I do. A boundary is a personal rule that keeps you from personal danger and I bet you live long enough to see that certain people need personal rules, right? Your family. If you come from a long line of people who struggle with alcoholism, There's no Bible passage that says you shall never ever, ever drink alcohol. But I know and respect some people that have made that personal choice, just because they know hey, in our family, this gets really bad really quickly, so I'm going to be the person. Maybe you don't go to bars, maybe this doesn’t have alcohol in my home, maybe who doesn't drink at all, not because it's wrong to do so, but because it's really wise for me not to do so. Some people are like this, was shopping, just stopping by the mall to see what there is rarely turns out well for you. So you got a brand new credit card. You put yourself in that immersive marketing experience and before, you know, you're walking back to your car with bags, looking down each arm, you're totally broke, something you wanted to do. But if you know that that's your personal weakness, you got to be intentional and you got to be careful and you got to come up with a rule that might be just for you, but it's going to keep you two steps away from a step that you don't want to take. And a lot of people at our church, who struggle with pornography, And so they have all kinds of personal rules because they know once the dominoes start going once, I'm alone, and I'm stressed and I have a screen and I'm bored. I end up doing something I really, really didn't want to do. And so they kind of make up rules about where I can have screens and how I can have screens. And it's anyone around, when I'm using my screens, there's no Bible passage that commands. That wise Christians are just wise enough to know, this is my danger, this is my kill. He's he'll, this is my weakness. So maybe you don't need this, but I do, that's what a boundary is. Now, I have a hunch that way more than problems with alcohol and food and shopping in this digital age, are people who have problems with devices. I've been a whole bunch of us kind of look back at our screen time and say, that's not what I wanted. It's not what I intended. It's just have these phones or everywhere and I just look at it and I get lost in it. I mean I think of it this way if you ask me what I did last weekend and I said I was binge eating It'd be like, oh, you okay? And I didn't say I was binge eating, but I said I was binge drinking. He would say, do you need help but think we use the same word. What were you doing last weekend, binging? My favorite shows me to like using the very verb implies sex. Is something we probably shouldn't do, but in our digital age, isn't that what most of us do do? So today I want to preach kind of a nuanced sermon to help increase your wisdom. So that many years from now, when you take your last breath, you won't look back. And say why did I waste that time? Why did I do that? Why did I live a more intentional life? We're going to set up some personal rules for you by the time I say, Amen. They're going to help you make the most of the limited time that you have for your face for your family, and for your friendships. So okay, what I want to do is jump back into the Book of Proverbs Which if you don't know is an Old Testament book that talks about how wise people live and in Proverbs Chapter 5 chapter 6 and chapter 7, we get to eavesdrop on this conversation between a really good father and the sons that he loved dearly His fathers having a heart-to-heart with his kids because apparently in the town where this dad and his sons lived was a woman who was very attractive Very persuasive. And very unconcerned about the wedding ring on her finger. She was an adulterous woman, who whenever her husband went out of town, she was aggressive with the men who walked by the door for home. Now, this father could have said to his sons, “Hey, boys, you know what the Bible says?” Don't? You shall not commit adultery. That's what God wants us to do. But this father actually goes a step further. He knows that sometimes when young men get too close to this one woman, they end up doing things that they should not be doing. And so, instead of just Don't and hoping and praying that, his kids have a supernatural self-control. He went a step further and he gave his boys boundaries. Listen, listen in on this father and Proverbs Chapter 5 and start today with verse 7. And here's what the dad said,
Now then my son's listen to me. Do not turn aside from what I say. Keep to a path far from her. Do not go near the door of her house. If you don't listen to what I'm saying, verse 11, here's what will happen at the end of your life. You will grow when your flesh and body are spent. You will say how I hated discipline, how my heart spurned correction, I would not obey my teachers, or turn my ear to my instructors and I was soon in serious trouble in the Assembly of God's people. You catch the wisdom there? Like if you don't want to end up yours from now saying, why did I get myself into so much trouble? Why didn't I listen? Why did I say whatever? It's going to be fine. I'm going to be fine if you don't want that to happen to you boys. Then listen to what I say. Keep to a path far from her.
Now Bible question, is there any passage so far in this book in the Old Testament that said You shall not walk down Main Street No. So what is this father doing? Keep to a path far from her. He's putting some distance between his sons hearts and their bodies and the voice of this woman.
So, what? I said do not even go near the door of her house. Are there any Bible passes? It says you shall not get too close to certain doors. No. Well then why does the father give the boundary? Because if you get really close to the door of her house, she might open it and you might see her. And she might tempt you. And you might step inside. So, you don't look back and say, why did I do that? Why did I give in to that? Why did I fall into that then sons? Here's what you should do. Keep to a path far from her and do not go near the door for the house. His dad wasn't just being overly protective a few chapters later. This dad also shares an experience that he saw from the window of his home. Jump ahead to Proverbs 7. Here's what the stat also says. And the window of my house, I look down through the lattice. I saw among the simple. I noticed among the young men. A youth who had no sense. There's a foolish dumb, young man. I'll make some foolish verse 8. He was going down the street near her corner. Walking along in the direction of her house at Twilight. As the day was fading as a dark of night, set in. Then out came a woman to meet him. Want to guess what happens next. Let me read you just a snippet from later in the chapter with persuasive words. She led him astray, she seduced him with her smooth talk and all at once he followed her like an ox. Going to the slaughter.
All at once, just like that. You got too close to the door of her house and before he knew it, something happened that he did not want to happen.
So, what is this ancient book of wisdom? Trying to teach us? Grab a pen and write this down the big idea is if you always go too far, Then don't get too close.
All right, if you can look back at experiences you or others have had and it always kind of ends up like this. Then don't put yourself in a situation thinking somehow this time it's going to be very different if you struggled with self-control in the past and don't just somehow pray. Well this time I'm going to be so much stronger. Know the smarter thing, the wiser thing isn't to ask. Well can I it's to ask, should I
That's a question. I want you to ask yourself right now when it comes to your devices. Because just like sugar and just like sex. Screens have a powerful influence on our heart and the chemicals in our mind. Maybe it's the way they're designed maybe it's the way the human heart is but very very many people just like when we get too close to that bag of candy or that sexual Temptation in the moments, you stop thinking and just react the brain, craves the dopamine high from whatever experience and if that's true that if you get too close to these screens, it's hard to be really self-controlled. Then what you and I should do if we're wise Is to come up with some boundaries. So before I say, man, that's what I want to do, I'm gonna get over practical with you. I'm going to try to apply this Old Testament, wisdom, to, our modern digital lives. I'm gonna give you five suggestions today. And before I jump in, let's just remember, these are boundaries. These are personal rules and not Divine commands, right? So you can't go and judge people based on these rules. Pastor Mike said, you shouldn't, no I'm just saying if you struggle with screens, if your children struggle with screens, here's some things, you might want to consider and talk about on the car ride home. Five suggestions to give you good boundaries to take advantage of the blessings and avoid the bad things. The first one is by far the most important one. In fact, if you don't do this one, I think you're going to ignore the rest of the sermon. So Circle it put a star by in your bulletin. If you're taking notes at home, underline it a whole bunch, you can't miss this. And most people do. The first suggestion I want to give to you today is to reject your Messiah complex.
You ever heard that phrase before the Messiah complex? It's a complex. It's this way of thinking in your head that you have to be available all the time. So you can save all of the people. I can't turn my phone off because someone will need me. I can't be more than an arm's length away from this device because there's going to be some emergency if this isn't buzzing and ringing and every meeting, church service and car ride. Something's going to happen and everything is going to fall apart. It's gonna be my fault. I have to be like God present everywhere to everyone all the time. It sounds crazy. But does that explain why almost every church service business meeting and class is interrupted by
Why do you have anything on? Well, I need to use your wife who is eight and a half months pregnant. You don't need to know what if the password is going to be an accident and my son's going to be like in a ditch because his car flipped over and he's gonna be like freezing to death and he's going to be texting me, help Mom, where are you? And it's going to be your fault because your phone was not even. This is what we think. There's gonna be an accident. There's gonna be an emergency. Someone's going to need me so I can't possibly turn it off. I just want to tell you up front that is false. The world is okay, without you. People don't just fall over dead. Once you turn your phone off, this happens, when you go on vacation, right? You're away from the office for a week and you come back and everything is fine because I like zombies taking over the room and dumpster fires ever. So it turns out you're expendable. Yes, you are. You don't need to have your phone off. People can survive without you reject. The Messiah complex. This happens with parents with their kids when they start to drive. My kid needs a phone if he's going to drive. Really, if I'm going to keep him safe, he needs a phone. I'm pretty sure there's like a million billboards saying, put your phone away because the devices have made driving more dangerous. As opposed to the opposite. All right, so let's just be honest with each other. 99.9% of the time you don't need your phone, you don't need it on. You don't need everything, buzzing and dinging. You don't have to. So just realize that when it buzzes and dings, it's not because you need to it's because you choose to and we're going to be a person who lives with boundaries, you don't have to walk down the street by her house, you can take another route and if it saves you from danger, smart people do. All right, sermon over. Well not really alright. Number two, I do number two. It's a huge one. I want you to consider some screen free spaces. Screen. Free spaces. I want you to think of, I just want to say quietly to make this as awkward as possible, but how is your mother dying? No, is your wife pregnant? No, no, she's fine. I'm moving on some screen free spaces. Sweet irony. I love it. I did some spaces in your life. We're really, if you think about It the point is not to click or to scroll or to check, it's actually something bigger and better and more important. Now, I would admit there's sometimes in life and some spaces where we go. We're checking your phone is not a big deal. For sit in the lobby wherever you are probably not sitting in the doctor's office, waiting to meet your best friend or the love of your life, right steep. All your phone and check. Well who cares? But there are other places where you go, where there actually is something bigger that you probably want. It's the reason why you came And is it wise for you instead of everyone having to resist? The temptation is to just make an agreement that this is a screen, free space. For example, the dinner table.
Right on, like Jesus at the painting of the Lord's Supper, where everyone's kind of facing One Direction dinner. Tables are literally designed where we get to look each other in the eye. And you only have so much time with your mom or your dad, your brother, your sister, your son or daughter. Life is crazy with practices and lessons in school and work. So, when you finally get that time to be at this one little square or rectangle together, wouldn't it be? Would it be wise to just put everything away? And even if it's just for 30 minutes to give each other, our full attention for a really good deep conversation,
And if that ask you a question that you don't know how to answer, you don't have to Google it right? Because once you Google it, you'll notice the text or the snap and will lose you. So wouldn't be smart. If that place is all about family connection, to make it a screen free place.
Sorry about this one. What about church? You may not come to church. I think we come with a higher goal if I want to know. God, I want to receive the love of God. I want to connect with the people of God, which is human nature being what it is. Once our devices are out, it's hard to compete for someone's attention with the internet. I'm not sure if it's just me but when church starts like I can't just sprint into worship and have my mind in my heart in the right spot, it takes some time for me to pray and think to ask the Holy Spirit to help me during this time. So if I'm, you know, rocking a couple levels of Candy Crush until like, the last second, I don't know. Is it me? Can I really worship for those first five minutes? And if I'm not, have I missed out on the whole reason that I came to church.
I actually think it's hugely important for this church. If you're watching at home, it's important for your church to did. You know, every single Sunday, we have hundreds of people who come here who are not members of our church family. Their friends and co-workers and neighbors and girlfriends. And husbands who take that. Huge step. Take a deep breath and show up in the strange unfamiliar Place. Hoping it's not a train wreck of a church experience. When I talked to those many, many people after their first visit
What most of them will say that they love what brought them back for a second visit was not the sermon. And it's not even the music is great. Is that what it is what you talk about?
You.
The people are so nice, Pastor. Like people, I have a hunch, they only met like two people, but the people that they met, the people who started a conversation with them were so kind that they could just Take a deep breath, relax and it was going to be a good spot. So if someone's always here for the very first time and they sit a row or two away from you, a chair or two away and you're lost checking work emails until the start of worship. You've actually missed an amazing opportunity to make someone feel comfortable here in God's house as we listen to God's Word. And so if we care about connections with God and connections with each other, is it possible that this could or should become a screen free space? I could give you a bunch of more examples. How about the bedroom? The bedroom if you're not married is really for one thing and if you are, it's for two things and neither of those things are binging the office. Scientists are telling us that if you want to sleep well, which I think is the point of a bedroom, then be careful what you do at screens, little stress you out, the light will mess with your brain. Like if you care about this thing, then be careful with these other things. And couples need time to communicate and connect to express their love and to make love making your wife compete, with whatever is on your device, is a dangerous thing and difficult for her to do. So these aren't rules. But dinner tables and churches and bedrooms or car rides, or homework. If you came to church with someone today to ask that question, what do you think should be our screen for you spaces? Next idea, this one's simple. But for me it's profound, do not disturb.
Swipe down. Find the little Moon. My phone's in Spanish so mine says no molestar no no no bothering me and you click that if there's some emergency if moms on hospice you can take it off but I live 23 hours and 40 minutes a day on do not disturb. Don't know if it's my squirrel-like brain, but if it dings or Rings or buzzes, I'm so curious that I always reach for it. And so I make sure that I only reach for my phone when I want to not when it wants me to
Ask you. Why is it read about deep work or truly creative problem? Solving? A brain scientist. Tell us that if you're distracted from something you're working on. It takes your brain about 23 minutes and 17 seconds to get back to the spot where it was. If I'm in the middle of writing a book, let me just check this quick. My brain doesn't get right back to the spot where I was. It takes time to catch up and refresh in the synapses are firing. It's almost like if you found some solution like a scuba diver your way down in the water and if you choose to come up for air, it's going to take you some time to get back to where you were. And so, if you're having a great conversation with a friend over coffee, or you're in the car with your son, just sharing wisdom, like the Proverbs and where are we? What some said, the most common phrase heard? When a group of teenagers are at a coffee shop? Together is wait, what?
When two people laugh and the third person was lost on their phone. When something you kind of hear it on the peripheral of your ears. Wait, what was that? Do Not Disturb in the 1970s, there was a shocking recent invention on the first iterations of computers that allowed you to have two windows open at the same time. Say wow, wow. And the people who are pitching the latest technological Advance. They were so impressed, but one scientist at the conference raised his hand and he was not impressed. In fact, he was incensed. He stood up and angrily said to the people. “Why in the world would you want to be interrupted while programming?”
If I sit down to work on this, Why would I want to be interrupted from doing that? If the reason I sat down was to do it, why would I want to have to compete with be of these days? We might update the question and say, if I finally have a chance to see my friend face to face, Why would I want some sports score to interrupt me? If I have this precious time with the people that I love or only one hour a week to be here with God's people in his house, why would, why would I want to be interrupted? No more lest our do not disturb. I'm doing sacred, holy work. Loving God and loving his people.
Next idea, I'll keep this one quick, limits forced decisions.
If you ever had to count calories before, I'm sure if you're on a special diet over, just done it to see what you do. If you don't count calories, you have to make any decisions, right? Should I have one peanut butter cup or 72? Okay, I'm not commenting, but if I had like a limits of the amount of calories, I could have my brain is starting to say well you have one more of those. You can't have one of those. If you live a limitless life digitally you'll just do stuff because there's no boundary to keep you wise and to keep you thought. So when you have a limit on your device, when you say, okay, you know, at the end of this week, if I spent a half hour a day on social media, I feel good about that. That forces you to think. Well, what kind of social media do I want to use? I can't just scroll and scroll and scroll because the clock's ticking and every minute I'm just like looking for something to entertain me. I'm missing out on something that I might really love like connecting with my friends on Snapchat or whatever. All right, so the devices are really helpful this way. It's really easy on modern phone so just pick a limit. I know there's a little button that says ignore limits so you can have to ignore the ignore button. But once you pick a limit that you feel good about in the end, it's going to force a decision that is going to snap your brain out of it. Like my wife saying stop and before you do something, you regret, it's going to call you back to wisdom. All right, final idea today. This actually might be the most important one of all. My wife told me, she read about this in a book on technology and faith and she was so right, here's what she learned Scripture before screens. Buy an old school alarm clock. Get your phone out of your bedroom. Don't allow that to be the first thing that shapes, the thoughts in your head or the emotions of your heart. Instead, keep an old school paper Bible as the one thing that's waiting for you when you wake up
I've been doing this for years as much as I love technology. I refuse to read my Bible through technology. I just can't handle the distractions. I just need this old school paper pen. Just me and Jesus to start every day. So, my wife does, she's a Godly beautiful woman. Some message is going to shape how you feel at the start of the day. When you grab your phone you never know what that message is going to be. But when you grab this book, you always do. I think the words of John 1:14, a great Christmas first. Speaking about Jesus, it says the word became flesh. That's Jesus coming down from heaven and made his dwelling among us, we have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only son who came from the father, full of grace and truth. I love that line about Jesus. He's full of grace. That means he has this unending Unstoppable, unconditional love, and he's full of Truth is there's no fake news in Jesus. He doesn't exaggerate, he doesn't lie. He doesn't flatter what he says is always true. You can always trust it and it's always for your good because it's always full of grace. If you grab your phone, what do you find? Opinion prediction. What do they say in The Newsroom? If it bleeds, it leads. Every death, every shooting, every war, every fear, anger bait. If you grab your phone, you are most likely to find things that suck the joy out of your very soul. But if you grab the word of God, if Scripture comes before screens, you start with something that is a firm foundation, the truth and love of God. Some of you here today. We're done this. You've never had a regular habit. The start the day with the word of God and if I can give you one piece of advice, it would be that. Find a Bible, stick it next to your bedside brush, your teeth, go to the bathroom, if you need to, and then crawl back in that bed and let God speak to your heart.
How about a week ago? A guy from our church sent me a picture that was very concerning to him. He was looking up some video from our church, a message that I had preached that he wanted to send to a family member and so he was typing in my name into Google and never seen that section in Google that says people also ask and then list a couple questions. The number one question. When he typed my name into a Google search bar was, how much does Pastor Mike Novotny make? And I had that little arrow, so you could open it up and see the answer. And he's pretty curious. And he clicked it and it said, $3.6 million. So he took a picture, he sent it to me, and I took a picture and send it to my wife. And she said, quote, I gotta get that life, insurance money, or some tragedy happened to me before Christmas. You got to talk to my wife, I think she did it. Well, it turns out there's another Michael Novotny. He is the president, I think of a dog food company. I'm in the wrong business. Holy cow, and he actually is worth $3.6 million…I am not, just in case you're wondering. We’re not that good a television Ministry. And I thought of that, here's this. Oh my goodness, I'm worth so much money but it wasn't true. Has anyone told you this about the internet? It's not always true. It's not as good. But you know what happens when you grab that book? It's always true. And it's always good. Because your heart just like mine has big questions about God. And Pastor. I've struggled with addiction or adultery. I keep going back to jealousy or over, so I have no boundaries. Can you forgive me? Is the frequently Asked question. When you grab a Bible and click on the insert, It says, the blood of Jesus purifies us from all sins.
And you think I'm so late to church? I spend most of my life not even thinking about God. Do I still have a chance to get to heaven?
And you open the Bible little window and it says God, so loved the world that he gave his one and only son that whoever believes in him. Whoever does will not perish, but have eternal life. I think about my struggle so much as a partner as parents as a person. I go back to the same things I told God last Church. A I wasn't going to do is their Mercy for me and you click the answer and it says our sins are many percent increased Grace increased all the more. And several blogs. Never some opinion, never some comments. It's the word that comes from the one who's full of both grace and truth. I promise you this, there's no better way to start your day and with the grace and truth found in Jesus Christ. So what are you going to do? Few rules, many suggestions. How can you live with wisdom? You don't have to do all of them are most of them, but I'd love for you to think very carefully at the end of my life. What kind of person do I want to be? What kind of relationships do I want to have? And how can these little growing rectangles? Help me get there instead of holding me back.
The fact is my friends, you are one Sunday closer to being dead. You only get one chance at this? Let's make the most of it. Let's connect with people. Let's connect with Jesus, let's make a difference. Let's let these be the tools that we use to get there. Now the problem that holds us back. May God help us do it.