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This Jewish Inspiration Podcast is dedicated to learning, understanding and enhancing our relationship with Hashem by working on improving our G-d given soul traits and aspiring to reflect His holy name each and every day. The goal is for each listener to hear something inspirational with each episode that will enhance their life.
All right. Welcome back everybody. Way number 39. Way number 39 is Noseh Baol Imchaviro. It's to carry the burden of your friend. Your friend is in a struggle. Carry that burden with them. Fill it with them. Be there with them. We call it empathy. It's to consider someone else's challenge and to feel their their struggle. Shear that burden. This is a very important trait because
the Torah teaches us how to be the best person possible. How do I be the best father, the best mother, the best brother, the best child, the best friend, the best spouse? You can't be excellent at any of those if you can't feel someone else's situation. If you don't know what they're going through, it's very difficult to really connect with them. It's very difficult to elevate that relationship beyond something which is superficial. Feel someone else's pain for real.
Particularly with people to whom you're constantly exposed to. You have a teacher teaching your class. Feel their situation. It's a struggle preparing the class every day, but you have a student. Feel your student's situation. You have a patient, a client, and they say that most psychologists need psychologists. Why? Because they make their patient's problem theirs. If you're really caring for a patient, you connect with their struggle and many times it becomes your own struggle.
We meet people all the time. The person at the bank, the teller, and the cashier, and the baker, and the butcher, and the beautician, and the barber. People everywhere around us, everyone's dealing with something. Everyone is dealing with something. The lady yesterday, I ran out in the morning to go get some milk. My daughter was trying to have cereal. She didn't have any more milk, so I quickly ran out and got her milk. The person right in front of me, the cashier, says to him,
so how's your day going? And he gives like this, well, well, well, he's hemming and hawing about how, you know, how the struggle of his day. She's like, oh, come on. Make it great. Make your day great. Don't be, don't be, you know. I thought it was really nice that she even cared that much to even ask. But most times people are just like, everyone's in their own little corner. Everyone's in their own little thing, and no one wants to
open up to other people. What is going on in their life? To deal with people effectively and intelligently, see where they're coming from. You have to learn to see other perspectives as well. The best way to do it is to have empathy. Feel someone else's struggle, their challenge. And we'll never really be completely in someone else's shoes, which is why Torah tells us, Al tadein et chavercha, at she tagia lemakomo. Don't judge your fellow until you're standing in their shoes, in their place.
You know what? Anybody here who's ever stood in someone else's place? No. We don't have the same background. We don't have the same schema, like, good word, good word, psychology, right? Which is the the whole background of their life, of how they grew up, and how they see things. Some people have a very, very diminished perspective of everyone's out to get them. You'll never understand that perspective if you don't think that way. There are people who are very jealous people.
You'll never understand them if you don't understand how they're jealous, etc, etc. A person needs to open up their mind to how other people are living, and you'll never really fully experience what someone else is going through. Never. You can try a little bit. The more we try, the better we'll get at it. Whenever you find yourself in a class, at work, or in a social gathering, pay close attention to the people around you. Learn their names, talk to them, observe their moods, and listen.
Wherever we are, there's always someone in need. Always. It may not be financial need. It may not be that they're hungry. I mean, they need a kind word. They need a compliment. They need a smile. Every human being has a need. Everyone. Figure out, the people around you, what's their need? If you don't feel empathy for others, you usually end up adding to their burden. Say the wrong thing while they're suffering. How many people have told me,
Rabbi, people came to visit me at the Sheva house. A person was sitting Sheva, and people say the most silly things. So someone's mother passed away at 93 years old. So how old was she? She was 93. Oh, that's fine. It's like, what are you? Well, it's someone's mother. If she's 63, it doesn't change it. If she's 33, it doesn't change it. It's still someone's mother. People think, like, it's like, and people, it's amazing that sometimes people think that they have to say something.
They don't have to say anything. Just sit there next to them. Feel their pain. That's it. I mentioned my brother has a podcast where he interviewed my sister. My sister lost the baby, and when she was sitting Sheva, she said how, you know, people feel that urge to say something. They just want to, they want to make sure that you remember that they were there, so they have to say something. Usually they say silly things. She said one lady sat next to her,
cried her eyes out. Didn't say a word. She cried her eyes out. Got up, said the verse that you say to the mourner, and left. That's it. Didn't say a word. She said she got more comfort from that woman, from everybody else with their smart comments. Oh, did you vaccinate the baby? Did you not vaccinate the baby? Did you? It's like, really? Didn't say a word. Just cried. It's like someone gets it. Someone gets my pain.
Sharing the burdens of others is the way to bridge the gap between ourselves and the rest of the world. Connecting us with the intrinsic oneness of humanity in the universe. Our sages teach us that every person has a spark of godliness. So in essence, we are all connected. We're all part of one entity. Humanity is part of one entity. I say that the people have a an affinity to their sports teams. Why? It's the craziest thing.
They're going here, love the Texans, and we love the Rockets and the Astros. Why? What does it have to do with me? What's it gonna change my life? In no way whatsoever. The people feel, if you're in Bangladesh, and you see someone with a UT cap, it's like, oh, we're from Texas. We're like brothers. What do you mean, you're brothers? You would never talk to each other if you saw each other here at the rodeo. You wouldn't say anything. But because we're part of, we're from one,
there is an affinity that we could find, a likeness, a similarity, a brotherhood, so to speak. A human brotherhood. We're human beings. We have more in common than not. We're more common than not. Righteousness is just a concept unless it is felt in the heart. We have to understand that other people are as real as we are. Every person you meet is struggling, facing challenges, has choices, has situations, every day, exactly like you do. Find common ground with other people.
They don't have to be going through the same exact struggle, but it's humanity. Let's find a way. And it's amazing that before we talk about judging people favorably, which is the next way, way number 40, we have this as a precursor. We need to first have empathy, and then you can judge people favorably. You can't judge people favorably if you don't feel for other people. So the next way is going to be way number 40. I look forward to seeing you there.