Did I Tell You About My Albatross | DITYAMA meets Those Weekend Golf Guys

In this episode of "Did I Tell You About My Albatross?", host Albi is joined by his co-host Panda and special guest John Ashton from "Those Weekend Golf Guys".

Albi/Brandon shares w

John shares his journey from being a successful radio personality to starting a golf-related podcast. The conversation focuses on the relatable and humorous moments in and around golf, making for an entertaining and enjoyable episode. Tune in to hear more about John's story and the unique approach to golf on this golf podcast for honest degenerates.

Albi and Panda slowly but surely worked in their favorite conundrums and asked for John's wisdom and take: "Can a human being swallow/eat a golf ball and live"

John has grown his golf podcast into a syndicated weekly show that reached over 300,000 weekly listeners.

[00:01:06] Fascinating golf-related podcast story.
[00:03:31] The walk-off albatross story... again
[00:08:11] The broadcasting/media industry's changing landscape.
[00:11:34] "Complete insanity ensues" (Mole Traps that kill)
[00:14:40] Funny animal stories
[00:17:44] Why are there not more...?
[00:19:23] The power of positive thinking.
[00:22:31] The odds on an Albatross.
[00:26:19] Missed calls and holding penalties.
[00:28:33] DITYAMA's favorite question: Can a human eat a golf ball?
[00:32:28] One-arm bandit challenge
[00:35:18] Taking off prosthetic leg to improve lie angle?
[00:38:31] Albi's Masters mishap.
[00:41:21] Chris Paul, sports hero.

As with every episode, Albi snuck in the special shout out to Scott Van Pelt #SVP and Chris Paul #CP3

Check out what John and Jeff are doing at Those Weekend Golf Guys:

Creators & Guests

Host

Billy Heiser "Shepherd", "Koala", "Mayor"

Billy Heiser, Dad, Husband, Entrepreneur, Business Tycoon, Professional Sports Performance Guru, Coached Multiple Top 10 Tennis Players, Grand Slam Champions, and Olympic Gold Medalist. Superpower: Bringing people together, making stuff happen. Sheppard is a leader… hints the name SHEPPARD

Host

Brandon Redding, "ALBI"

Like a walk-off Albatross to win, this podcast is a rare bird indeed. Less etiquette, More hilarious, No story is too wild for our golf podcast. sept 23 launch

Host

Laken Fischer "Panda"

Husband, PGA Teaching Professional, Superpowers: Comedy, One Liners, Whit, Intelligence. Crowd Favorite, Favorite Course: Tobacco Road, NC, Caddied at Bandon Dunes, Special skill of one liners and fixing slices, made Albi a reformed hooker.

Guest

John Ashton

John Ashton - Founder of Those Weekend Golf Guys, a golf podcast for the everyday golfer. John has grown his golf podcast to a syndicated radio show that reaches over 300,000 listeners every week.

What is Did I Tell You About My Albatross?

Host "Albi" made a 1/600 million, walk-off albatross (2 on a par 5) to win a 2 day golf tournament in Tampa, FL. So he started a podcast to tell the world about it and to find/share stories like his.

Welcome to ‘Did I Tell You About My Albatross’, the golf podcast that delves into the most incredible, improbable, and downright mind-blowing moments in golf.

Every episode feels like teeing it up with your favorite foursome, filled with laughter, storytelling, and the camaraderie that makes golf so unique.

The inception of this podcast is rooted in one of golf’s rarest feats: a walk-off albatross. In the 2020 Member-Member tournament at Carrollwood Country Club in Tampa, Florida, Albi (Host) defied 1 in 600 million odds, making a 2 on the final par 5, last hole/ last shot securing a miraculous win. This monumental shot wasn’t just a game-changer on the course; it transformed Albi’s life.

Join Albi and his Co-hosts: Sheppard (pro athlete whisperer/performance coach guru), and Panda (PGA Teaching Professional) as they uncover the best "did i tell you about...." moments in and around golf.

Discover the magic, the mayhem, and the moments that make golf the incredible game it is.

Welcome to another episode of Did I Tell You About My Albatross?

I'm your host, Albie.

This is the goth podcast for honest degenerates.

It's like teaming up with your favorite foursome every week and diving into the best stories in and around goth.

You guys ready to tee off?

Let's go.

Welcome, everyone.

I'm your host, Albie.

And we got a special one for you today.

I've got my main man Panda.

He's on the tee box here with me.

We've got you the listener that makes three and then a special surprise to round out our foursome.

There he is right over there.

We've got a special guest with us today.

John Ashton from those weekend golf guys.

If you're one of the 300,000 people who tune into this guy every week on his golf podcast slash radio show, he's turned a podcast and flipped it around into a syndicated radio show.

I can't wait to learn more about that.

then you probably already know that John is the real deal.

But for those of you who don't know, wait till you hear more about his story.

It's fascinating.

He was a very successful and popular broadcaster slash radio personality, then was inspired to start a golf-related podcast, a podcast about something he loved, just like us, golf.

What's great about this.

And the reason that I was so excited to have you on John is because you guys really focus on what we're focused on.

It's not like your typical golf podcast.

That's that's, Hey, what's on Jordan's peace mind.

What's when's tiger coming back.

There's some of that, right?

Just naturally, because it's a golf podcast, but it's not the focus.

It's more of the super relatable moments in and around golf and the most hilarious stories.

And that's exactly really what our show is all about too.

So again, we're excited that you joined us.

Thank you.

So real quick, before we tee off, I asked my producer not to tell you too much about us, John.

I wanted there to be some allure, some romance to this whole relationship that we're getting ready to kick off here, right?

Okay, real quick.

Do you know why we call our show, Did I Tell You About My Albatross?

Or have you heard about this lucky albatross shot?

I haven't heard the Albatross story, no, I'm sorry, I apologize.

You're about to.

Okay, so the year is 2020, and we're at our member, member tournament here in Tampa, Florida at Carolwood Country Club.

And it is a hot day, John, we were pretty burned out.

Not Panda and I, I played with someone else at the club, but it was hot.

My buddy and I, we were all over the place that whole weekend, really.

We had no business even being in this thing.

But we come up to the 18th tee, which we finished on, it was a shotgun, so we finished on pine one, which is a par five.

I hit a great drive, which I'll say that like I'm not bragging.

I'm saying it was unbelievable.

I hit a great drive because I was all over the place that day.

I had no business getting in the fairway, land in the fairway, 247 out, take a three-wood out, and I hit it, and it goes in.

Now, we have two buddies that were waiting for us at the green.

And I knew I hit a good shot.

I didn't know it went in.

We go up there.

My buddies are like, hey, man, did you hit a good shot?

I said, yeah, yeah, I think I hit a pretty good shot.

Well, it went way over the green.

So I'm starting to look for this thing for like a good 5, 10 minutes.

I can't find it anywhere.

Finally, I'm like, where the hell is this thing?

Where is this ball at?

I've been looking for it.

What are you talking about?

I thought I hit a good shot.

I turned around and they said, dude, it went in the hole.

It went in the hole.

And I'm like, and obviously we freak out and everything.

That's not even the crazy part.

The crazy part is we go in to turn our scorecard in and we realized that going into that hole, I was three shots back from the leader.

So with that walk-off albatross, we tied for the win of the tournament.

And so, so, so John, all right, so I, you can see this guy, he's completely zoned out.

He's heard this story hundreds of times.

My wife, I swear if she hears me tell it one more time, I'm getting a divorce, like not by choice.

She's going to leave me.

My kids can't stand it.

Three and a five-year-old, they're like, dad, dad, we can't take it anymore.

Just please.

And then all my friends can't take it either.

So I said, you know what?

I'm going to start a podcast.

I thought, John, I thought it was going to be famous.

I thought for sure I was going to be on ESPN.

I thought Scott Van Pelt was going to be interviewing me.

I thought Fallon.

I didn't know what was going to happen.

Nothing.

Crickets.

So now I'm like, I'm going to start a podcast on this thing and I'm going to tell the whole world about it.

And that's why you see eight logos behind me.

You see a shirt.

We're just completely obnoxious with this thing until it takes flight.

So that's kind of where I'm at.

But I'll tell you, the whole reason I tell you that is an introduction to you is because one of the things I love about you guys is you focused really on, you took an interesting spin on this thing and I love it.

You guys really decided to focus on the average golfer, not on these golf nerds that are worried about... I mean, I'm sure there's a lot of those, too.

You guys have a huge following.

I'm just kind of curious, like, what made you decide to go down that route, which I thought was a very clever move, by the way.

Very serendipitous, actually.

I started... Should I go back and just start from the very beginning?

Let's go.

Genesis, please.

Yes.

Okay, so I'm big time disc jockey here in Louisville, Kentucky.

Actually, I've been working everywhere between Bangor, Maine and Atlanta, Georgia since I was like 18 years old.

But anyhow, I'm doing a morning show here.

I've been doing it for 12 years.

We're way up in the ratings.

Everybody's cool.

And I get off the air one day in 2010 and they call me into a meeting and say, John, listen, you're too expensive.

You need to go make your own way in the world.

Walked me out the door.

Wow.

Yeah.

So I called up a buddy who ran a talk station and I said, Hey, I'll do some voice work for you.

Trade you for 30 minutes of airtime.

Started a show about golf.

It was just me at the time, basically just to make my golf tax deductible.

Oh, interesting.

First off, I knew Jeff was a, Jeff Smith was a director of instruction at a local golf course in Indiana called Otter Creek.

And he was pretty good.

He had come recommended.

He was a great teacher.

So I called him and asked him if he wanted to come in and be a guest.

And he said, certainly.

He came in and he was fantastic.

We hit it off immediately and asked him when the show was over if he'd like to do it again.

And he said, I'd like to do it every week.

Oh, wow.

So I said, okay, sign you up.

So I went out and figured, well, if this guy's gonna be here, we might as well start working at it and maybe get a sponsor or two.

So I was at the PGA show in Orlando and came across Martini Teas.

They had just been, they were new.

And I talked to the guy and he said, sure, I'll try it for a month.

So he was our first client.

And then at the end of the month, I called him back and he actually, I didn't call him, he called me.

And at the time, we were just a local golf show just here in Louisville.

And he said, yeah, he said some guy called and just ordered a whole bunch of these and he said he heard it from those golf guys.

So I figured it was you.

The show grew and grew and I got a phone call from the program director at the SportsMap Radio Network who said, hey, I've heard your podcast.

Do you want to be on the radio?

And I said, well, you know, as unaccustomed as I am to being on the radio, sure, we'll give it a try.

So 102 radio stations coast to coast later, and here we are.

Man, congratulations.

That is amazing.

And then, you know, we had a chance to chat before our buddy Panda here was chasing down some brewskis for us and came in.

One of the things I brought up is there's so much noise out there, and I can imagine you've seen at least.

such a huge shift.

How have you seen the industry change?

All aspects, like marketing it.

I mean, like how, it's gotta be just night and day.

It is.

And it's, it's a sad too, because I, I started in, in its heyday.

Personality radio was the big thing.

You know, I grew up in Boston and New York, you know, and Bruce Bradley and, and, and Cousin Brucie at WABC in New York.

What about Stern?

Did you ever get into Howard Stern at all or no?

No, Howard Stern hadn't quite been Howard Stern.

He wasn't yet the king of all media when I was living in New York.

But Don Imus, who was Stern's nemesis, he was there doing mornings on WNBC.

He was just a hoot.

He didn't care.

I love that thing about him.

But anyhow, what has happened is that accountants have gotten hold of the broadcast industry.

What do you mean by that?

The guys who run the large companies, and now every company is a large company.

You don't really have mom and pa radio stations anymore.

You have conglomerates like iHeart and Cox and all these people who own multiple, multiple media outlets.

And the folks at the head of those companies are accountants.

They care about beans, because that's what they do for a living.

They count the beans.

And they have to make sure that more beans come in than go out, and they have to make a profit.

They have no understanding whatsoever of what their product is.

They think all they have to do is sell advertising.

So they hire more salespeople and they fire good radio personalities.

And you've got a bunch of, and I don't want to step on anyone's toes, Tampa is a market that's still pretty good.

But for the most part, you've got a bunch of minimum wage people who don't have any idea what they're doing on the radio.

You might have one really good talent and he voice tracks for multiple markets.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

Listened, in fact, to a voice track today, and the voice track was obviously done in advance because somebody wished Suzanne Summers a happy birthday.

Oh, man.

And she just passed away, right?

You know, and she passed away the day before her birthday.

Unbelievable.

Yeah.

So, yeah.

But that's what's happened to the industry, man.

You don't need the radio to hear music.

You need the radio to be entertained, but nobody entertains with the radio anymore.

All they do is play music.

What do you think is the best way to entertain?

You've carved out really your own niche here in that you talk about what you want to talk about, and whoever wants to get on board can get on board.

Otherwise, you guys are at a point now where you're like, that's fine.

Was that something that you guys have always, you've always had that mentality and attitude?

Yeah.

Yeah, our show prep is like, what do you want to talk about?

Oh, I don't know.

Let's just start.

Something will come to me.

That's our show prep as well.

Yeah, that's actually a couple layers deeper than what we do typically.

I've got a blank whiteboard right there that we use.

It's completely blank.

I mean, we actually do put some time into our episodes.

I mean, probably no one's going to believe that.

It's probably hard to believe, but we really do.

I wanted our audience to have a place to where they could hear amazing golf-related stories,

but also a place where they could share theirs.

Like, I think for me, when I, when I go on a golf trip, I don't go on as many as I used to, but when I go on a golf trip, man, I mean, I max it out.

Things just get silly and it's not just me.

Like I'll talk to my other buddies who go on trips and it's the same deal.

It's not just trips either.

Like when we're even just playing our regular club, I mean, you're, you're five hours, you're with another human being, things can get kind of crazy.

So I love that.

And that's my favorite part about golf.

And in fact, I'll, I'll give you an example.

Like we just went up to the masters this past year.

And again, we belong to this club here in Tampa.

It's called Carolwood country club.

It's owned by a conglomerate named concert fix our greens concert.

It's a great club.

And thank you for having us, but fix our greens concert

And the nice part is though, they reciprocate with about 20 or so clubs across the country.

And so on our way up, we played a couple of them and we're about 13 or 14 holes in this thing.

Now, I just, we've been drinking, we had some sodas or high noons, whatever you want to call them.

And we are about 13 holes in on the 14th hole.

I just lost a lot of money on 13.

So I decided to leave the group and go on up to the tee box to think about things.

As I'm heading up to the tee box, I get there before anyone else and then

complete insanity ensues.

I'm like, I wonder why she has her art here on the tee box.

I picked this thing up out of the ground, and there's spikes.

And I'm like, what kind of Marilyn Manson looking thing is it?

I'm pointed at my face.

And I'm from North Carolina, but really I'm from kind of the city.

I don't know what these kind of things are.

And I look at it, and as I'm putting it down, it triggers.

It's a mole trap, John.

It almost killed me.

It hit my arm.

It could have easily impaled me.

That would have ruined our master's trip that I've been looking forward to.

But I mean, this kind of stuff, this is just a normal day on a golf trip with the boys.

When I first moved to South Carolina, did mornings in Charleston, South Carolina for about four years.

And one of the first phone calls I got was from the guy who ran the parks department in Charleston.

And he heard me say something about golf and he said, John, man, I love your station.

I love your show.

If you want to play golf, just come on out anytime.

Wow.

So I got done 10.30 every morning, and I just head on down to one of the local Charleston City golf courses and play golf.

And I was getting relatively good at the time.

And I went out by myself, and they hooked me up with an older gentleman, because this was back in the 80s.

And we were playing, and I hit a terrible slice, man.

It was a 300-yard drive, 200 yards out, and 100 to the right.

And I asked the guy I was playing with and riding with, and I said, sir, did you happen to see where my ball went?

And he smirked a little bit.

And you're talking to the kid who grew up in Boston and New York, OK?

And he smirked a little bit.

And in his great classy Charleston Southern accent said, yes, I did, son.

It's right over there next to that gator.

I didn't know that they were real.

You know, you get alligators here.

I thought you had to be like in a swamp in the tropics somewhere.

No, we got alligators.

And it was, I was playing a little orange ball and it was right there in the swamp next to an alligator.

Did they let you move it?

Did they give you relief?

They let me drop for free.

Oh, wow, look, sweethearts.

John, they don't do that down here.

In Tampa, like, these alligators, they're everywhere.

And it is, like, again, I'm from North Carolina.

There's two animals that just are different.

Like, I still can't get used to them.

The fact that you play most golf courses, ours don't really have them.

We've seen a couple of them out there, but nothing crazy.

There's alligators on just about every course out here, including, we just played Old Memorial, and there were, I saw some big ones out there yesterday.

I don't know if you saw any.

Yeah, but I mean, that's like kind of normal.

I can't get used to it.

And by the way, my buddies don't let you move it.

They say you got to play it.

Take it free.

Oh yeah, no, you can move it.

You're going to have to drop it.

You shouldn't hit it there.

There's no alligators in the middle of the fairway.

We've got tons of funny animal stories, but then the other ones are sandhill cranes.

Like these things, they're just, I don't know if you've ever been around a sandhill crane before, John, but they're, they're about five foot.

They're like big bird.

They're like a big, so we,

One of the stories we shared is that when I first moved here to Tampa, I was playing this course.

I go into the pro shop.

It was the turn and I was grabbing a couple of beers.

And I go in there and I'm like, I look at the guy at the pro shop.

I'm like, hey man, you got a bird out there that's not doing too well.

He's kind of moping around.

He's one of those stand hill crane things.

And he said, yeah, there was actually someone that ran one over the other day on a golf cart.

I'm like, oh man, that's terrible.

And he said, yeah, and they actually mate for life.

And I'm like, what do you mean they mate for life?

He was like, yeah, yeah, there was a wildlife refuge person.

That's probably not the right term for him.

But they came out and they said they'll actually stop eating after their mate dies.

Now, John, let me just change camera angles here.

Now, I love my wife more than anything.

I don't know how many days I'm gonna go.

God forbid anything happens to her, I think I might eat day two.

I mean, I'll go a couple, I may be good.

But to starve yourself to death, that is crazy to me.

What a committed animal that is.

And it just made me respect him more, but man, they're everywhere here.

Panda thinks they're good.

We have geese.

We have Canadian geese.

We had those in Carolina.

They're beautiful, aren't they?

Well, that's one thing.

We were playing at a course, and there was two holes.

Number 10 and number 11 were around this pond, and the geese were congregating there, which meant there was a lot of geese poop.

Goose poop, however it is.

Geese are tough because they poop everywhere, and then they'll get on the green.

They do, man.

They do, and it's terrible.

And it really messes up the flight of your golf ball, too, when it hits.

But that's a different story.

But a friend of mine was saying, I hate these geese, man.

Why don't they go south?

And I said, Mark, these are Canadian geese.

This is south.

They're up there playing hockey half the year.

They're coming down here for some CSCS.

That's funny, man, wow.

Yeah, I mean, so tell me, I mean, so you have, you've lived in quite a few different places.

You've had quite the journey here, John.

What's your favorite, like what's your favorite place to play?

Where I live now and have lived for, well, since 1991, I don't dare do the math on that.

The golf is good.

There are so many golf courses around and the greens fees average anywhere from 22 to $40.

Okay.

And that's, I mean, that is so affordable, it's ridiculous.

That's amazing.

The best golf was in South Carolina.

Really?

You go up to Myrtle Beach and Myrtle Beach is golf central.

I mean, I played the course in Myrtle Beach.

I hit a slice and the ball landed on a fairway, not just the fairway next to mine, but on another golf course.

Well, there's hundreds of them around there, right?

Like we, as a kid, that's where my family, I mean, we'd go there for our summer beach trips and it just got more and more commercialized.

But the good thing is like they just built more and more golf courses, which was just amazing.

I haven't been up there in years.

So that's another thing that keeps coming up around us.

So we, like to me,

There are so many golfers and a lot of people out there playing golf.

Why are there not more?

What's your take on this?

This stumps us.

Why are there not more people seriously injured from golf balls hit astray?

I mean, just random golf balls on a course just absolutely.

Or, like, even in a PGA Tour event where they'll have the galleries, like, literally within, I mean, 20, 30 yards.

And, I mean, these guys are the best of all.

I get it.

But, man, like, I mean, we play with good golfers, and you could easily, in my opinion, you know, shank or, you know, do whatever.

I mean, it happens.

You could kill someone.

To me, that's why I'm surprised there's not more people that aren't, you know, seriously hurt.

Yeah, I am, too.

I know just from the tournament standpoint,

It is because the guys are good.

Yeah, right.

And if somebody did get hit, you wouldn't see it on TV.

Is that what it is?

They cover it up a lot?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Well, that's the thing.

That's why we think all these guys are so good is because you only see the good shots.

Well, and you don't see them shanked.

And they have, oh, by the way, they have a thousand people that if you hit it a little to the right and, you know, meanwhile, we lose our ball because we don't have a thousand people looking for it.

These guys can put a little orange flag right there.

But that would be helpful.

I mean, that's not.

It would be, wouldn't it?

I think we should have marshals on every hole just for all of us.

We want less people out there, John.

We don't like slow golfers, man.

It just drives us crazy, so.

The one that I like is the guy who just hit a 190-yard drive, and he's 250 from the green.

Yes.

And he sits there and waits for the people to leave the green before he takes his next shot.

Yeah.

I used to really get really bad when I played with people I didn't know or I had people I didn't know watching me.

I got very uptight and had a few sessions with a sports psychologist who explained to me that your mind does not, your brain does not understand negatives.

So if you say, don't screw up the shot, don't top it- You're telling it to screw it up.

You're telling it exactly.

That's why people say that water hazards have magnets for golf balls.

It's because most of us will sit on the tee over a water hazard saying, just don't hit it in the water.

Well, that's exactly where it's going to go, because you've just told your body what you're on.

I'm in sales, and I'm a firm believer in all of that.

Thoughts become things, and to your point, it doesn't understand negatives.

I don't know if Panda does this or not, but Jeff, when he has a competitive student, a college player or a high school player,

He'll work on them with trouble shots, how to recoup from a trouble shot, right?

And he'll take them into the woods, drop a couple balls and say, you know, get out.

And he said, inevitably, they have no problem getting out.

But if they hit it into the woods, they have problems getting out because they have the anger at themselves of hitting it there in the first place.

Wow, they can't let it go.

Yeah, yeah, so that's one of the things he teaches people.

And yeah, he explains also that the game of golf is the simplest thing in the world.

All you have to do is hit the ball in the middle of the club face.

The way we end our shows is, hey, golf's easy, fairways and greens.

Just think fairways and greens.

If only it was really that easy, right?

Have you ever had a hole in one, by the way?

No.

Yes.

Oh, asterisk.

I did.

I don't want to try to compete with your stories.

Oh, please, no.

But it was in a scramble.

Okay.

And we had paid the stupid money.

The mulligans and stuff?

The money for the extra, for the mulligans and for being able to hit from the women's tee and the string and all that shit.

And this was a tee off from the woman's tee.

And it was about, I'd say, probably a 230-yard hole from the woman's tee.

But it was a par-4, wasn't a par-3, it was a par-4.

And it was a hump.

I couldn't see the green.

I had to check and see what tree to aim at.

And I just hit a hell of a drive.

I mean, it felt good.

It was one of those, you didn't feel it.

It just flew straight.

And we were looking for it when we got to the green, because we knew it should be pretty good.

We started looking like 20 yards in, couldn't find it anywhere.

And there was a maintenance guy on a tractor on the hill.

He goes, you all looking for your ball, son?

I said, yes, sir.

He said, check the hole.

No way.

Yeah.

Do you have an albatross?

Yeah, that's legit.

That's an albatross, John.

Yeah.

You're in the albatross club, man.

I mean, I got a little weirdo with this hole.

I got into it with the stats.

Do you know what the odds are on an albatross?

Off the top of your head.

Yeah, probably not because you could probably care less I like to me This is like all I got anymore.

I told you three and a five-year-old.

This is I'm holding on to it So the odds on an albatross are 1 in 6 million.

Okay, that's that's actually pretty much agreed on Do you know what the odds on a hole-in-one is 1 in 17,000 now here?

I took it a step further

So I have to say I, because last time I said we, he yelled at me.

I hired a data scientist to figure out what the odds are on a albatross as your last shot in a golf tournament to win it or to tie for the win.

to be in a predicament where you're three shots back going into the last hole of a multi-day tournament and you make an albatross.

This data scientist, it took him three weeks.

I mean, he had like, he was like losing, like he, I just picture like Einstein back there.

Like I can't even do the math, like, you know, sitting there like in a fetal position, but finally he figured it out.

And I have the three page paper.

I posted up on our website stuff, but man, what's crazy about it is the odds he came back

It sounds ludicrous.

One in 600 million to be in that predicament and then to be down three shots to hit an albatross, he came back with one in 600 million.

And that day you did not go buy a lottery ticket?

I did not.

It's funny you say that because- No wonder you haven't won yet.

I know.

Well, they said that the Powerball is one in 320 million.

I could have won the Powerball twice, John.

And everyone's like, well, would you rather have the Albatross or the Powerball?

I'm like, are you crazy?

Of course the Powerball.

I mean, I'm not an idiot.

It's a lucky shot.

I get it, but anyway.

I can buy an Albatross if I win the lottery.

Yes, exactly.

I feel like you guys have a great mixture where you'll go down these little tangents.

Love the basketball tangent in your last episode, by the way.

I'm a huge basketball guy, and I'd love to talk basketball with you at any time.

He is too.

But you have a really good combo of that.

But then you also have a really good dynamic where you still touch on these golf stories that are, they're pretty moving.

Like I told you, that one that you shared with the corn fairy guy, I don't know if you heard this one, but the one with the corn fairy guy that lost his tour card.

It was lift clean in place, and he dropped it

to get it back and it rolled toward the hole, so he had to pick it up and put it back.

I mean, there was a rules guy with him that didn't say anything.

He picked it up and he just placed it.

Well, the rule says, you know, rule 327-14C or whatever, that you have to attempt to drop it twice before you can place it.

And somebody who was watching on a TV monitor somewhere

Told him after his round that they were going to assess him a two-stroke penalty Which took him out of the top 25, which mean he did not get a PGA tour card You're okay with that.

I don't know that you want me to answer that.

He's a blue coat, John.

He's a blue coat.

He's the PGA blue coat.

Or USGA.

What a heartbreaking.

There was a rules guide there.

The rules guide should have been told.

That's what makes me mad.

I get it's a rule, but I mean that to me like

It gave the guy no competitive advantage.

And to your point, John, there was a rules official there.

Like, I feel like if there's a rules official there watching you, here's the thing.

Do you know how many penalties in the NFL or even in a basketball, name a sport where they missed the call and then someone can phone in from home and be like, hey man, you guys missed that call.

And they're like, you know what?

We gotta go ahead and reverse that because someone phoned in a call, we missed that one.

I mean, you ask any.

Yeah.

Any lineman will tell you that there's holding on almost every play in the NFL.

Some of them get caught.

Some of them are blatant.

Some of them, not so much.

But, you know, I've seen holding that nobody's called.

I don't get to call in.

And where do these numbers get posted?

I mean, how do these guys that are watching know who to call to say, hey, where is the phone number?

We should put that phone number up on our... We're going to put that phone number up on our... Give them the wrong number.

That'd be great.

Things that Jeff that Jeff has done for me though if you look like because I've played golf with him a couple times One time he laughed a lot and then started getting serious about you know helping me But you've done that with me one of the one of the things he'll do is he'll tell you listen don't play for score It's especially if you're learning or if you're practicing or whatever it is you're doing he said just count how many good shots you have you know because because the frustration of you know

double and triple bogeys, it does not bode well for you doing better on the next hole.

No.

We've got club throwers at our place, John.

We've got some epic club throwers.

I'm talking about, there's one guy who I love, shout out to Johnny Mack.

He's one of my favorites.

He's our most loyal listener.

He's one of my best friends here at the club.

this guy's got a frequent shaft replacement card.

So you go into the local, have you ever heard of this?

You go into the local place to get his club reshafted and they're like, oh, then they punch his little card and after 10 he gets a free one.

And he's, he's burned through several of these.

It's crazy.

Jeff's like one of, I mean, he's one of the top, is he one of the top 100 PGA teaching?

Wow.

That's second year now.

He's top 100.

Yeah.

That's great, man.

Yeah.

Cause it's gotta be, I don't know how you guys do it.

I mean, it's gotta be, you gotta have the patience.

You gotta be a saint and you gotta have the patience of whoever has a lot of patience.

Cause I have no idea.

I mean, I'm trying to teach my little three and five year old.

My daughter's actually taking, we have these things called Birdie Basics at our club and she's doing it and loving it.

And it's the cutest thing ever.

Now my son, he, I just can't.

And I don't want to push him.

I'm not going to be like Earl Woods and throw firecrackers at your feet while you're looking over a putt to try to throw, you know, work on your mental game yet.

But it's coming for this kid.

Okay.

I cannot wait for that for that moment to be out there and actually play with them So, you know, we're a little different in the podcast format.

We've got So they try to rein me in here.

I love the silly.

I love absolutely the silliness of golf and I love silly questions.

They're a little random This is gonna be a probably a little outside of the norm of what you and Jeff might cover But let me tell you our sweet spot here.

One of them is

This question here, can a human being, love to get your opinion on this.

Can a human being, yeah, can a human being eat a golf ball and survive?

It's a good one.

Can a human being eat a golf ball and survive?

Any golf ball?

Has to be, well, one of the modern ones, not like one of those, what do they call them?

Like a feathery.

Featheries.

Yeah, like the featheries, like yes, yeah, not that.

No, one of the ones, I would say probably what, a four, what do they call it, the three or the four layer?

Yeah, we'll just say a Pro-V.

Yeah, can you eat a provian, Liv?

Not if it's one of my provians, because I'll kill you.

Those things are expensive, man.

Come on.

No, I don't think anybody could.

I don't think you could chew one.

And if you did, I'm not sure those polymers would... It's going to take a lot of gnawing.

I go back and forth with this.

This is one of these things.

These guys are like, they're waking up early to watch the Ryder Cup.

I'm already up because these kind of questions run through my brain.

I can't fall asleep.

because I keep trying to run the scenarios.

And I'm thinking to myself, Shaquille O'Neal, huge esophagus, huge throat.

This guy can get it down because you got to figure it out, you guys.

Well, anyway, so that's one of the questions.

The other question- You didn't say swallow, now you said eat.

Oh, so sorry.

Okay.

You can swallow.

We'll let you swallow, right?

Yeah, can you get it down?

Can you get it down and live?

Yeah.

So I don't know.

We don't have to- I don't know if it would kill you coming back out or not though.

That's my thing.

I think it's worse on the other end.

I think you can get... I'm a firm believer that, yeah, you can swallow a golf ball.

John, we've asked this so much, we may actually do this for subscribers.

Like that's how- We may have to get a paramedic on site.

Yeah, we have to get a paramedic.

Good luck with that.

People swallow swords.

That is good.

You had a good point there, yes.

They do swallow swords.

They do not digest them, however.

Joey Chestnut, the hot dog guy?

I mean, that guy can probably do it.

I don't know.

The other question that we came up with, you actually came up with, just tell them.

You'll tell it better than I can, the one-armed bandit.

We had a scenario come up where somebody was hitting, a right-handed golfer had injured his left arm.

Like a scratch player, like a good player.

He could really only hit balls with one arm, but he was practicing a pretty religious amount.

And he said, you know, I think I can break 40 with just my right arm playing golf from the red tees, from the most forward tees.

And I said, I bet you can't.

And on top of that, I bet I can throw it into the hole quicker than you can.

And so we decided to go play nine holes and figure out a definitive answer of who is a better, who can get it in the hole in the least amount of strokes.

One person throwing the ball or one person playing with just a arm.

Just one arm?

What do you, just based on that right there.

No, he only played nine red tees.

He played nine holes.

The tees are like 2,800 yards.

He practiced for a few months.

He did.

Yeah.

Where do you think, who do you think wins that one?

Who are you putting money on?

Who are you putting money on John?

I'd go with the one armed golfer.

The one arm with the stick in his hand.

Or the woman club, okay.

With the club, yeah.

Yeah, I went back and forth with this forever.

It took me a couple months to get these guys to finally do it.

That guy fell out, by the way.

That guy's a wuss.

But our other co-host was good enough to, he was like, all right, I'm gonna practice for a few weeks.

And he did.

And he's also a good golfer.

I mean, they're like a one, two handicap.

And so we just did it.

One day I bought, I actually bought a drone for this.

I bought a drone.

I had the video.

I've got multiple camera angles.

It takes, you know what stinks about doing a lot of video and camera angles?

It takes a lot of editing.

And it's taken me a couple months when you don't know what you're doing.

It takes a couple months for me to do it.

It's getting ready to come out, but I'll spoil it for everyone just because I want you to have the answer.

And I went with you.

I said the guy with the club, you can hit it further.

But Panda pulled it off with one hole to spare, and he was the thrower.

And I will say, though, when you putted, you kind of leaned forward.

I don't know if you saw Bozo back on the Chicago WGN.

Do you remember that Bozo show where he would... Oh, they had him in Boston, too.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So then if you remember, one of the things, my favorite game that he did, he had this little... This was way before Panda's time.

He would have these ping-pong balls, and he would throw them into the bucket, and then you'd win toys and prizes and stuff if you did that.

So that's kind of how he did the ball.

He would lean over, he would put a little thing down, he would lean over, and then he would roll it in.

Yeah, the rule for putting was my feet couldn't move, and I held on to that.

But I did close him out 1-0.

He did close him out 1-0.

As the thrower.

And my whole thing was, I'm never going to throw it into the water, and if I throw it into a sand trap, I just toss it out.

A one-armed bunker shot is not a whole lot of fun.

Yeah, no.

He does have an advantage off the tee.

I can't throw it as far as he could hit it with a drive.

This guy can throw a golf ball about 100, what'd you say, 110?

110 was the max.

It was unbelievable.

You gotta see, I'm gonna send you the video.

It's unbelievable how far he can sling this thing, but...

You know, they have a one-armed golfer tournament.

Dude, that's interesting.

Yeah.

Like, what now, are these people that actually are, like, they have, like, are they disabled with one arm?

Yeah, they've lost an arm somewhere.

They can only play with, they only have the one arm to play with, but they still play.

Oh, and I've actually played with someone like that, and he beat the hell out of me, that's for sure.

He was an amazing golfer.

Like, he was, I mean, literally was like a two or three handicap.

He was really good.

Yeah, guys who do it because that's all they have,

Do it very very well if you're up against a real one-armed golfer not just somebody using just one arm I bet you you would have lost back on

Third hole.

Now this is gonna lead to another story.

And this is one that I just, I love this story so much because the underdog, I'm a big underdog guy.

So this guy was a, he had a prosthetic leg.

And I, again, I won't say who told me, I'm trying, I don't even know if I can share this, but I'll share with you kind of the broad details.

It was actually the Michael Jordan, this is getting pretty specific.

Actually, Michael Jordan's tournament out in, I think Salt Lake City or one of those places.

And it was a two-day tournament, came down the last hole, the two guys were playing these other two guys in the last group, and came down the last hole, they hit it to drive, the one guy ended up being in the bunker.

Now this guy just happened to be, he was playing in a regular tournament, he just happened to have a prosthetic leg.

He was just a good golfer with his prosthetic leg.

But he had a bunker shot, and it was kind of an awkward stance.

And this guy got up there and he needed a par.

If they got a par, they would have won the tournament.

Gets up there, couldn't figure out the stance, takes off his prosthetic leg, puts it in the cart.

hits an amazing bunker shot with one leg.

It goes three feet from the hole, knocks it in, not only for par, I think for birdie to easily win.

And then as they go in and turn their scorecards in, the guys they were playing with turned him in for a rules violation because he took his leg off.

And they called it improved his lie.

They improved his lie.

I'm like, if you get beat, I'm sorry, if you get beat by that, I feel like that guy absolutely deserves that tournament.

That is the most- It does.

That is ridiculous to me.

That's crazy, but that happened, supposedly.

We're not here for facts.

Yeah, well, no, I think that was, I think that was real.

All right, anything else we got for John?

Let me get out of the way.

I mean, I think that's kind of where we're at.

So anyway, John, thank you so much for joining us tonight.

I mean, I really do appreciate you carving out some time.

We'd love to get together with you in the future.

We've got some other random contests and stuff coming up that we'd love to get your feedback on them.

But just more importantly, man, thanks for carving out the time for some new podcasters and trying to figure this thing out.

My pleasure, man.

It's been fun.

And you ever get up to, I know Podfest and the PGA show are going to be both in Orlando around the same time this coming January.

I was just talking to him because he's a PGA.

I get tickets.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He gets tickets to the Ryder Cup.

We almost went to the Ryder Cup because he gets, you know, being a PGA.

I'm sure Jeff does too, but.

Well, Jeff went to the Masters.

Let me tell you a quick story about that.

Oh, please.

Jeff has, and I can't remember where his wintertime perch is, but it's somewhere in Florida now.

Boynton Beach or something like that.

Some beach that begins with a C. That's not too far, is it?

At a private club down there.

Anyhow, his summertime gig is out in Colorado.

at Eagle Springs in Aspen area, all cut Colorado officially.

But it's a very exclusive private club being in Aspen, as you might imagine.

The guy who owns the Empire State, or owns a company that owns the Empire State building is a member there.

And one of the guys who's a member there is also a member at Augusta National.

Oh, wow.

So Jeff took his son, 20-something-year-old son, to the Masters.

Jeff got a ticket.

His student got tickets for his son, met him at the gate.

took him on a tour of the clubhouse, introduced him to members all over the place.

And he had basically the run of the course during Saturday's round at the Masters.

Can I tell you my experience at this?

Like, I think I paid $1,200 for a practice round and it was amazing.

Like, I'm not saying, I'm not complaining, but I get there, I get there, John, real quick, I would like to run, but so I get there, we're having the time of our life.

We're waiting on the T-Bots for, cause this Tiger, Rory,

And this is past year, you know, we, this was, I kind of forgot that like Tiger was going to play this year.

And then he like at the masters, I think one of his screws came out of his leg or something crazy.

So like, but, but yeah, we were there and he was with Freddie couples.

Rory, and I think Kim.

Anyway, it doesn't matter.

But we waited for a couple hours there.

We were right there.

I'm looking down, like right before Tiger's walking up in his group, and I got my shirt completely on inside out, and it just bothered me.

And I'm like, I'm gonna flip this thing around.

John, I don't know what I was thinking.

We were literally in the front row.

As Tiger's walking up, I take my shirt off, and then it got all tangled.

I'm like, it's Gusta.

Thousands of people around keep in mind like think about exclusive Augusta is and and I got my shirt off Okay, that's not good and then it gets all hung up and stuff I'm trying to flip it around people are looking at me like I'm a maniac and and luckily, you know And anyway, this guy came up to me after and he goes, hey, man, I just want you know I'm a long-term member here.

Keep your shirt on, you know, you can't do that.

Like don't do that again

And I'm like, okay, I'm so sorry.

So then we go in and I'm like, I'm a nervous wreck.

I go in and get my pimento cheese sandwich that I've been looking forward to all day to kind of settle down a little bit.

And I'm like, all right, I've always wanted to do this.

So as I'm paying for it, I'm like, oh, you know what?

Can you just put it on my member number, please?

And then it threw the girl, I said it convincingly and she's like, oh, member number.

Wow, I've never had anyone ask that before.

Everyone starts looking at me like I'm a, like, you know, I'm the guy out there with a shirt off.

Like I have nobody like, and I'm like, no, no, no, I don't have a member.

I'm just joking.

Like there's no member number here.

Anyway, what a special place that, that Augusta is.

Well, also, this has been very special too, John.

Thank you again for coming on, and we'd love to connect and collaborate in the future.

Door's always open.

Come on in, man.

All right, man.

I'll take you up on it.

But, you know, I will say, I'll leave you with this thought.

The one thing you and I at least share, and I know Panda too, we all...

The game of golf is just so cool.

It's very special, and I can tell how passionate you are.

And you guys have been able to grow this audience and really this fan base just through sheer passion.

And it's something that we're trying to do too.

So anyway, kudos to you, man, and hats off, and job well done.

Appreciate it.

Yep.

Tell Jeff we said hey.

I will.

I will indeed.

All right, man.

Hey, you know, just throw out there, the PGA Championship is at Valhalla in Louisville this coming summer.

Just saying, we know people.

Yeah, no, we should, we can do that.

Get right down here to Florida, man.

We'd love, I mean, do you come down at all or no?

Come south?

You know, I just found out half my family's moved to Tampa, so.

No way.

All right, now you got some more family here, man.

No, we'd love to have you.

Have you been in Louisville long enough that you get mad if somebody pronounces it Louisville?

Yes.

That's great.

Yes, it's it's in fact you have to I figured out the very early when I got here you have to swallow while you're saying it because it comes out.

Yeah, you gotta speed it up.

Well, you know, it's funny.

You mentioned basketball in your last episode and you guys talked a little bit about it.

And you mentioned even Wake Forest, which is I'm from Winston-Salem, North Carolina.

And shout out to Chris Paul.

Chris Paul is my, he's my sports hero.

Like I just, he went to my high school.

Anyway, one of my goals is to, I'm going to blow this thing up.

I'm going to, until I get to interview Chris Paul and until Scott Van Pelt.

And then one of the things I vowed for

I said, hey, if I can get interviewed by Scott Van Pelt, maybe Chris Paul, and if we get 150,000 people that listen to this thing, I'm never going to share my Albatross story again.

That's kind of the rule.

And we'll see if that- And Panda's got his fingers crossed, I can tell.

Yeah, I'm really hoping we get there.

This is actually how the golf ball thing came up, because he was like, all right, well, then you're going to swallow a golf ball if you go back on what your word is.

All right, John, thanks so much.

Thanks for tuning in, everyone.

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