"Opened Dawes" Podcast Ep 12: Be a Messenger NOT a Messiah!

Show Notes

This is the podcast of  “Opened Dawes” Live, which runs weekly as a live video show on YouTube, Facebook, and LinkedIn at 11 am on Tuesday mornings so that we can throw open the doors and welcome you in for a relaxed sharing of information, tips, thoughts, and answering any questions about public speaking and presentation/communication skills you may have.

So, make sure you set the reminders for the shows on Facebook or YouTube (links below) as they are scheduled online and get involved.  The stream is designed to be interactive, with comments/questions able to be shown and attributed on screen.

This week’s show delves into the effect of changing our mentality from dictating our information/message to others, to sharing our knowledge, experiences, and skills for people to choose whether to absorb and grow from.

We all grew from hearing others at some point in our lives (and still do), and we have probably all switched off when someone dictated their information and spoke AT us.  But not only does it influence how your audience receives your information, but also on how you feel about presenting it.  Relieve the pressure on yourself by just sharing your knowledge and information as an option for them and feel the difference when you realise that they are there to hear this, not to judge you! 

This show can be watched live (and previous shows recorded) from the following locations:
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/OpenDawesTraining/live

YouTube:
www.youtube.com/channel/UCnwlPiWylgEDLrwemI8ZZjw (or search YouTube for Open Dawes Training and click subscribe to be notified)

Thanks to:
www.opendawestraining.co.uk
www.chrisdawescomms.co.uk
www.opendawestraining.co.uk/connect

What is "Opened Dawes" Podcast?

Open Dawes Training is a public speaking, presentation and communication skills coaching company, with the key motivation of the company being to help people open doors that they may not even know exist yet, with increased confidence, willingness, and skills to present and speak in front of/with others. The podcast is taken from the live weekly "Opened Dawes" Live video show, where founder Chris Dawes dives into the key areas that make the difference with "public speaking", whether that is for those who are too nervous to do it or those who want to "up their game", whether that is for presentations, presence and participation in meetings, delivery of training, sales pitches, demonstrations, or even just communication with others in the best possible way. Chris Dawes: "My key ethos when I formed the business is that we are not, and should not be trying to create the mythical blueprint of the "perfect presenter", but unlocking each person's own personality, growing their confidence, helping them to be in control, organised, and of a quality that will make them become asked to do it more often, and no hesitation in their acceptance to do so. Apparently, public speaking is a soft skill, but it is a soft skill that gives your core skills a voice! Everyone owes it to themselves, and it is priceless to all of us that get to listen to them share their knowledge, experiences, passions, enthusiasm, and opinions. It gets them, their organisation, and their product/service recognised and appreciated, and helps us to grow and become more empowered from what they have to share."

Greetings. Welcome to Episode
12. of Opened Dawes Live. My

name is Chris Dawes, founder of
open door strainer. And as I've

always said project of passion
because I've realized the doors,

it's open to me. And I'm hoping
it can open more doors for you

whether that is more sales,
bigger sales promotion, starting

your own business, just
presenting in general providing

training, being having greater
presence in meetings, all of the

above. That's really what Open
Dawes Training is all about.

Well, Episode 12 is the title is
be a messenger, not a Messiah.

And it's a Be honest and say
it's it's a phrase that I heard

quite recently that I absolutely
adored, because it encapsulated

a message that I've had for some
time. And I just loved the way

that it rang because it's all
too easy to fall into that trap

of almost dictating, when you
present when you provide

training, when you add your two
pennies worth to meetings is

that it can be all too easy to
go this this this is the fact

this is this, this is the way it
is. And unless it is

categorically black and white,
you know your Pythagoras theorem

or something is a blast from the
past. But it unless it is, you

know, statistically, the two
plus two equals four, then the

best way to do it is to just
relax that tone. Now, as I say,

in the description for this one,
it's an interesting one for me,

because this has a double
benefit. One, it will be

received an awful lot better by
your audience. They won't feel

spoken at, they won't feel
dictated to. But equally for

ourselves, it really can relax
us. Because if we in our mind,

if we're kind of putting
ourselves at risk, I guess

that's the best way to say it,
where we're sort of saying,

right, I'm now standing up and
I'm setting myself up for for a

fall of some description, then
Oops, sorry about that didn't

mean to press that. If I'm
saying categorically, right, I'm

going to tell people that this
is this, and that is that I'm

gonna be extra nervous because
I'm worried about what people

may think about that. How are
they going to interpret? Are

they going to? Are they going to
warm to me? Are they going to

agree with me? Are they going to
disagree with me. Whereas if you

just lighten it and share your
knowledge, your experiences,

your skill sets that you've
built over time, your opinions

based on what you've seen and
done. But make sure that you are

expressing them, as you know, in
my opinion, if you're going to

get into the opinions realm, but
if you know that you're just

going to put that buffet out for
people to take as much or as

little as they want. You're not
putting pressure on yourself. If

somebody happens to disagree
with the information, that isn't

that they are then going, that
person was a fool. Absolutely

not, they're going to go well,
do you know what i like that bit

that they said, but I didn't
fully agree with that bit there,

then that means they don't take
that bit, they leave that be

that isn't what was of interest
to them, they're just gonna pick

up the bits and pieces. If you
think about yourself, when

you've been to a presentation.

Invariably, you know, let's say
the presentation for argument's

sake is is an hour long, or half
an hour long, whatever, it

doesn't matter. And they will be
sharing an awful lot of

information with you. And you
come away with your own little

tidbits that that really
resonated with you that are

going to have an impact that
you're going to go and try to

put into practice. But if you
spoke to somebody else that's

come out of that room, there
might be one or two key things

that would would sort of be
taken on board by both of you

because as a speaker, you're
always hoping you're going to

get you know, a couple of real
powerful in high impact elements

that are going to resonate with
with the majority if not all,

that there will be different
things because each person is

doing their job with different
people with different experience

levels, with different
objectives possibly. So you're

all going to be picking your
different bits that are going to

be important now. For us to then
accept that that kind of goes

okay. That's a good point.

They're not going to be taken
everything I say as fact as

right for them. Therefore, let
me just put out everything that

from my experience, from what I
have learned from what I have

seen, it doesn't mean you need
to use those exact exact words

necessarily, some people do. But
if you're putting it out there,

you're not setting you as the
person that's sharing it up for

a fall. Whereas if Can you
imagine if somebody stood in

front of you with information
from your experience that you

kind of go? Actually, that's not
strictly true? I don't fully

agree with that. But if they've
gone, this is the way your

disagreement in your mind is a
bit more blunt, I would say

probably, because you're going
was overwhelmed that you're

stood there telling me that that
is the fact. But I'm afraid from

my experience that that wasn't
the case. So how dare you stand

up there? And tell me that is
the way I'm exaggerating it?

Because I'm sure you wouldn't
think that. But if that person

has just said, we have
experienced this, and so what we

believe to be the case is this.

You're going to go? Okay, I can
see why you've arrived at that.

But actually, interestingly, we
have done x, y, and Zed, which

means a, b and c are a little
bit different for us, you're not

offended, you're not thinking
any less of that person, you're

waiting for the next bit of
information they're going to

share because didn't agree with
that. But let's see what's

coming next. Whereas if you've
been wound up, the probability

is you're going to go I don't
even want to listen to any more

of this. I'm sure the majority
of us can remember times where

we've been spoken at where we've
been told dogmatically, this is

the case. And you kind of go I'm
not sure. I fully agree.

Equally, by the way, is that
it's all too easy. If you're

going to you know, dictate that
you can forget the wood for the

trees. I, we arrived at that
conclusion because we understand

this. But what about if somebody
else doesn't understand this,

you've told them that
dogmatically so they feel they

can't challenge you. Whereas if
you kind of go, you know, this

is what we found a bit more sort
of, you know, friendly, I guess

they might kind of go well, I
don't fully understand how would

that be the case? And you kind
of go all that you've forgotten

that you don't necessarily
haven't done this? Have you seen

that? Have you experienced that?

You're able to find the signpost
to the objection. I guess,

really, especially in sales, we
know that objections are the

signpost of the sale is the
phrase. And far too many people

think it's a negative, but he's
not, you're just realizing that

rk have left the gap there. But
people aren't going to go asking

you to fill in the dots fill in
the gaps. Sorry, if you've just

dogmatically said, this is the
case. You can put people on the

backfoot. So by sharing
information, sharing knowledge,

sharing your experiences and
opinions and skills that you've

learned that you have that could
compliment others, whatever it

might be.

If you go in with that mindset,
you will relax an awful lot

more. I often have it with, you
know, with my training with with

these live shows very much. So
I'm always sort of paranoid

going on. People might not agree
with with the things that I'm

sharing. That's healthy.

Sometimes those people
preferably off record, maybe

we'll feedbags out by the way,
you know, you were talking about

that? Well, we actually had
experience of this. Oh, really?

Okay. Guess what that tends to
find its way into my future

presentations, or trainings or
live shows or whatever it might

be. So I'm always listening, I'm
always learning. But I try to do

these shows in the way that I'm
going look, this isn't my way or

the highway. This is just trying
to offer thoughts, food for

thought, to kind of almost think
about the effect I mean, this

one for example, it think about
the effect it has had on you

when somebody's spoken at you
when someone's being dogmatic.

Think about the effect you may
have had if you've ever done

that yourself, and think about
how you feel before you stand up

to present before you stand up
to provide your training course,

before you speak up in that
meeting, that you are part of

half the pressure that you put
yourself under because you're

thinking right I've I've got to
be right because I'm saying I am

just relax it offer information.

Then listen, of what the
interactions are from other

people. Is it questions? Is it
disagreements is it nods is it

smiles. So look as well as
listen Sorry, I should have said

I always tried to make sure I'm
paying Attention as much as

possible. And that includes
whenever you're having

presentations, trainings or
meetings via webcam as well, is

that I'm always trying to sort
of keep half an eye on other

people's cameras, so that you're
looking to sort of see them

going on or disagree with that,
or, yeah, that's a good point,

when you're face to face is
great, because you see people

nudging each other, but you're
just offering information, what

you're also doing is that you
are giving yourself room for

maneuver within that, speaking
up in public, whatever it is,

because you are offering
information, you are seeing how

that is received. You are seeing
reactions, you're hearing the

reactions, and you are able to
react accordingly. If you think

about in terms of even an
interview, you've got things to

offer, don't turn around and go,
you know, I am the best that

this because I've done this,
this, this and this, and it was

the best experience.

Paraphrasing, but you turn
around and share. Okay, I have

done these things. And I found
it a good experience when I was

able to do that. And I felt that
I grew from this. watch their

reactions, listen to the
questions, they could suddenly

go, Oh, really, but did you?

Sorry, I forgot to tell you that
I've done that prior to this

some years ago. So it was good
experience, then to use this and

you are reacting, you're giving
yourself room for maneuver in

whatever it happens to be. We've
all got information to share.

We've all got knowledge and
passions and experiences that

are really important to share.

That power of sharing that
information is what enables all

of us to grow further. We'll all
have grown from other people

sharing information to us in the
past, still to this day. That's

why we go to seminars and
webinars, because there's still

more for us to soak up to learn.

your knowledge, your
experiences, your skills, your

passions, your beliefs, they are
vital to be shared with other

people as well. I've always said
that by doing that you can get

recognized. But also you are
empowering others whether it's

the next generation, whether
it's your your colleagues,

whether it's your subordinates,
whether it's ones as well, who

knows. And it's just a very
powerful thing to be able to do.

But just take the edge off and
share that information, rather

than speaking at people and
telling them this is so unless

it is categorically you know,
two plus two equals four,

there's a difference between a
presentation and a lecture. I

think that's the key thing to
think of, am I giving a lecture?

Or am I giving a presentation to
share information to share my

findings to share my
experiences, to share my

beliefs, then share them that
way. Rather than talking at

people and telling people that
really is, is today's show, I

hope that that was useful.

Remember, this will actually
also be going out as a podcast,

probably third Friday, it should
be scheduled to go out something

like that keep an eye out on the
social feeds. And on the on the

website goes out on all of the
main thing Amazon, Apple, Google

podcasts, I can't remember,
there's like too many for me to

remember. But it goes out as an
audio podcast as well of this.

Hopefully, it's like these
little tidbits that can be be

helpful and useful to you in
some way. I'm also presenting on

Thursday, 12 o'clock, I need to
put it out on social media,

actually, I'm giving a webinar
for the business exchange.

They're doing a big charity
conference this week. And

they've asked me to give a
presentation via webinar to

charities about how they can
present online, we have the same

level of presence and impact
online whether that of course

they have to they have to pitch
their charities to get support

and action and all of that sort
of thing. But as far as I'm

aware is that I'm going to
provide the link on social media

is that other people can jump on
to that webinar as well 12 to

one on Thursday afternoon, and
it's kind of like more of an

actual sort of almost training
module, if you will. So

hopefully, you know some of you
will find that interested. But

either way this was Episode 12
be a messenger, not a Messiah.

Thank you very much for for
listening today. It's been a

pleasure having your company as
always. And don't forget you can

drop me a line at any time with
any questions. We can have a

free 30 minute consultation to
see if there's anything I can

help with immediately if we're
looking at whether any of the

training is of use, whether
that's face to face, or our

online hybrid training programs.

We've also got some free
downloads on nerves and starting

a presentation if you go to Open
Dawes Training da w es Open,

Dawes, training.co.uk. And if
you add a forward slash connect

to the end of that, you'll see
all the different ways that you

can connect and downloads and
watching things and listening to

things or bits and pieces to
hopefully help you. But thank

you very much for your time, and
have a fantastic rest of the

week. I'll see you next week.

Cheers.