The Smoke Trail S1 E21 Smoke on Empathy vs Compassion

The Smoke Trail: Season 1, Episode 21 – Empathy vs. Compassion 

Host Bio:

Smoke Wallin is a serial entrepreneur, conscious leader, global M&A deal maker, and host of The Smoke Trail podcast. Having navigated personal trauma through spiritual awakening, Smoke studies traditions like Buddhism, Christianity, and mysticism. His journey—from childhood challenges to leading global businesses—fuels his mission to share tools, truths, and stories for seekers, blending leadership with spiritual growth to inspire transformation.

Setting:

Recorded in the serene embrace of Sedona, Arizona, where the red rocks radiate spiritual clarity, this solo episode captures Smoke’s reflective voice after an impromptu gathering with friends. The desert’s quiet energy, infused with the warmth of recent conversations, grounds his insights on empathy and compassion, inviting listeners to deepen their consciousness journey.

Summary:

In this solo episode, Smoke Wallin explores the pivotal distinction between empathy and compassion, sparked by a dinner conversation in Sedona about a friend facing negative energy from an ex. Drawing from the friend’s highly empathic nature, Smoke explains how empathy—feeling another’s pain—can lower one’s vibration by matching their negative state, often harming the empath more than helping. Compassion, however, involves understanding and holding space without absorbing negativity, maintaining a high vibrational state of love, as in Episode 17’s heart-centered leadership. Smoke offers practical tools to protect one’s energy field: nightly journaling to clear emotional “hairballs,” as in Episode 20, and gratitude practices to sustain high vibration, per Episode 15’s affirmations. He emphasizes that our natural state is bliss and perfect health, achievable by clearing debris—negative thoughts and emotions—through conscious practices, echoing Episode 11’s consciousness as health. By pivoting from empathy to compassion, we avoid perpetuating negativity and help others heal faster, as in Episode 8’s “humans as medicine.” Infused with Sedona’s radiant clarity, this episode empowers listeners to lead and live with love, raising their vibration for personal and collective growth.

Learnings: 

• Empathy Lowers Vibration: Feeling another’s pain can match their negative state, harming the empath, per Episode 16’s mindfulness. 
• Compassion Holds Space: Understanding without absorbing negativity maintains high vibration, as in Episode 17’s intentionality. 
• Clearing Debris Heals: Nightly journaling releases emotional blockages, echoing Episode 20’s clean-up practices. 
• Gratitude Elevates: Practicing gratitude, as in Episode 15, aligns with love and bliss, raising consciousness. 
• Natural State is Bliss: Clearing negative thoughts restores perfect health, per Episode 11’s consciousness teachings.

Universal Truths: 

• Compassion is Love: Holding space without judgment uplifts, as in Episode 13’s love over evil. 
• Consciousness is Health: Clearing emotional debris restores ease, per Episode 17’s collective healing. 
• Presence Protects: Staying high-vibrational, as in Episode 16’s presence, shields from negativity. 
• We Are Divine: Our natural state of bliss is within, echoing Episode 1’s awakening. 
• Love Heals All: Compassion transforms pain, as in Episode 8’s human medicine.

Examples: 

• Dinner Insight: Smoke’s talk with an empathic friend about her ex’s negativity sparked this episode, reflecting Episode 17’s listening. 
• Compassion in Action: Holding space for a friend’s pain without absorbing it, as Smoke advised, aligns with Episode 8’s medicine. 
• Journaling Practice: Smoke’s nightly journaling to clear regrets, per Episode 20, sustained his high vibration. 
• Gratitude Shift: Saying “thank you,” learned from Ivan Rados in Episode 11, elevated Smoke’s daily energy. 
• Health Restoration: Clearing emotional “hairballs,” as in Episode 10, restored Smoke’s natural bliss.

Smoke Trail Threads: 

• Consciousness (Episodes 1, 9, 11, 13, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20): Smoke’s empathy-compassion pivot ties to his awakening, Steve Hershberger’s map, Ivan Rados’ health, Chris Clements’ action, Rob Follows’ intentionality, Rob Hersov’s love, Dave Garrison’s genius, and Episodes 16-17, 20’s tools. 
• Healing (Episodes 2, 8, 10, 16, 17, 20): Smoke’s debris clearing aligns with Sarah Fruehling’s EMDR, Liv Fisch’s human medicine, Dani Brooks’ coherence, and Episodes 16-17, 20’s hairballs. 
• Presence (Episodes 2, 3, 8, 15, 16, 17, 19, 20): Smoke’s high vibration echoes Sarah Fruehling’s breathwork, Jack Maxwell’s living now, Liv Fisch’s holding space, Rob Follows’ meditation, Dave Garrison’s curiosity, and Episodes 16-17, 20’s calm. 
• Gratitude (Episodes 9, 15, 16, 17, 20): Smoke’s gratitude practice connects to Steve Hershberger’s gratitude, Rob Follows’ affirmations, and Episodes 16-17, 20’s vibration shift. 

• • Leadership (Episodes 4, 6, 12, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19): Smoke’s compassionate leadership ties to Michael Brabant’s safe workplaces, Justin Breen’s vulnerability, Elizabeth Funk’s empowerment, Rob Follows’ significance, Rob Hersov’s advocacy, Dave Garrison’s alignment, and Episodes 16-17’s conscious leadership.

What is The Smoke Trail?

The Smoke Trail, hosted by Smoke Wallin, is a journey into awakening consciousness, weaving authentic stories and deep discussions with inspiring guests to unlock high performance and perfect health. Each episode delves into spirituality, leadership, and transformation, offering tools to transcend trauma and find your bliss along the way. It’s a reflective space for achieving peak potential and inner peace in a distraction-filled world.

Anitra: 00:00

Welcome to the Smoke Trail hosted by Smoke Wallin. Join Smoke on a unique journey of awakening consciousness, sharing authentic stories and deep discussions with inspiring guests. Explore spirituality, leadership, and transformation, tools to elevate your path.

Smoke: 00:17

Hi, Smoke here. Welcome to the Smoke Trail. Finally back in Sedona after a bunch of travel and had a little impromptu gathering of old friends and new friends last night. And during the conversation, we ended up talking about a number of really interesting topics, but one of them was that one of the people at dinner was experiencing kind of negative energy attacks from an ex, and she was wondering how to deal with that. And we got to talking a little bit, and it turns out she's highly empathic, so she's very much feels what the other person is feeling and has a big heart and frankly that's been an issue for her for a long time is that, you know, she's so open to trying to help people that it affects her negatively.

Smoke: 01:26

And one of the other people there, their partner is highly empathic as well and has a lot of issues. He has a lot of issues processing and getting stuff out of his system because he's he's so empathic and and so that topic ended up being kind of an interesting dialogue and one of the things that I think is really really important for everyone to recognize is first of all it's great to be highly empathic. It means that you care about others, you sympathize with them, you've got a great ability to see other people's plight, if you will. But the the problem is in empathy, you typically migrate to the vibration of that person or group or whatever you have empathy for. So the empathic kind of open approach tends to bring your vibration down, is why so many empathic people suffer from negative situations because they bring it on themselves.

Smoke: 02:39

Sometimes this happens with healers, sometimes this happens with therapists, sometimes it happens with just, you know, girlfriends talking and one is always dishing and one is always accept, you know, listening and very, very empathetic and as a result takes on that energy. There's a huge difference between, and this is a really important pivot, between being empathic and being compassionate. So empathy versus compassion. So let's talk about that for a second. So the more advanced teaching is take advantage of your empathic ability to see the other person's position, understand it, and have compassion for them, but don't take it onto yourself.

Smoke: 03:25

So compassion is caring. It's absolutely, you know, seeing the other person's situation, understanding their plight, if you will, but it's not taking it on your own self. There's only one person, entity, thing, anything that we each have control over and that's ourselves. So nothing else you do, you do not have control over anyone else. I don't care if it's a family member or a child, whatever.

Smoke: 03:56

You might have a little bit more guidance with a child, but you don't control anything about what they end up doing in the end of the day, what the hell they think, how they are. You can influence it, you can be positive, but we don't control anything else. So when you think about that, there's it makes no sense to take on other people's burdens. It makes perfect sense to have compassion, which means you can hold space for them. So there's a difference between putting yourself in their shoes and holding space for someone's issue.

Smoke: 04:26

Right? So that it's perfectly fine to say, you know, I'm here for you. You know, someone's going through a big problem. I'm here for you, and I'm I'm here to listen. And have that person get dish or whatever they do.

Smoke: 04:42

But do it from a place of holding space, not taking it on. And instead of, you know, instead of, you know, jumping into their shoes and agreeing with them automatically, it's perfectly fine to say something like, I totally see why you would be upset about that. I didn't agree with necessarily the position. I just can see why that person would be upset about that situation. So it's just a different, perspective, but it's about holding space.

Smoke: 05:16

So I think if you can think about that, it's a really important pivot. It's a it's just a and it's a small pivot, but it can protect you from taking on the energy of others. Now, let's get to we tend to feel like we are helping someone when we put ourselves in their shoes. And what happens is our, let's say we're coming into a conversation at a very high vibration, a very positive energy from a position of love. And you make contact with someone who is really feeling shameful, doubt, you know, guilty, you know, just in a really bad, negative, low energy place.

Smoke: 05:59

And the second we empathize with them and put ourselves in their shoes, we take our our energy field down to theirs or down toward it. Maybe not all the way. That is not helping them. That is actually perpetuating their level of, emotional state, their mental state, their energy, their vibrational state. And it's actually hurting you and not helping them.

Smoke: 06:26

So being empathetic sounds nice, but it actually it doesn't solve anything, doesn't really help anything. You're not actually helping them if they think you're you're an ally and you're sitting there and you're just wallowing in the same negativity as them, you're just perpetuating it. You're making it more. You're actually worsening it. So, when you have compassion, you hold space, what we're really saying is we don't allow our own vibration to go down and match theirs.

Smoke: 06:54

So if we can hold our positive love state or unconditional love or whatever you're up to, and you can hold that that feeling, that vibrational level, and hold steady at it no matter what the circumstances are. And in in this case, we're dealing with someone who's distraught or someone who's, you know, dishing and trying to get you know, shovel their issues onto you, or at least they're just really hurting and you're sitting there. The thing that helps them heal and work through their issue the fastest is being in the presence of a high energy field. So your high energy vibration is the most important thing because if if you're stead holding steady and you're strong, the stronger field prevails. So the odd the the the time it takes for them to get out of that wallowing, that guilty, that shame situation will shorten to the degree that your field is very strong and you are present and holding steady.

Smoke: 08:00

So it's really important teaching. It's like it's just a little pivot. It and, you know, compassion is love. It is it is a a pure form of love than empathy because it is actually helping solve. But compassion doesn't mean you take on someone's problems.

Smoke: 08:16

Doesn't mean you let your vibrational level match theirs. And and it sometimes could feel like tough love a little bit because you're not you're not agreeing with the other person. Now back to the the person at dinner whose x was sending negative energy. The way this ties to that is you don't wanna fight that person. You don't wanna engage with them on a on a negative energetic level.

Smoke: 08:47

You basically can pivot to compassion and saying, obviously, this person is damaged, wounded, hurt, needs healing. That's why they would be sending me negative energy. What happened to them in their childhood? What happened to them in their younger years? What happened to them where they have taken on such negativity that they're dishing it out.

Smoke: 09:13

Right? So there's you can have compassion for them. Again, not being empathetic, not jumping into that person's shoes, and not condoning the sending negative energy, just having compassion. That helps protect your field. You can prevent that negative energy from penetrating you by keeping your own vibration high.

Smoke: 09:32

That led to a conversation around, well, how do I do that? So we talked about a lot of different ways of clearing and things. And I on my last episode, I I actually went into some detail about a couple simple tools that allow will will help allow you to keep your vibration higher by clearing the night before with journaling, by going to gratitude. You know? So I watch that episode if you want some tips on that.

Smoke: 10:00

But if the the other the last thing on this kinda how do I keep my vibrational field high, you know, there's the whole clearing up, cleaning up, and and and doing that that deep work. And the reason that's important and why it has to be part of your waking up process is to hold your vibration at at any kind of higher level. You can't be allowing yourself to chase thoughts and emotions, energetic forms down. And so if you wanna stay at a very positive, super high outlook, you know, unconditional love vibrational field, we can't chase our thoughts that are coming up negative. We can't chase our memories that are negative.

Smoke: 10:53

We've gotta keep clearing that stuff on a constant basis. And it's so important to do that. But the good news is our natural state is unconditional love. It is bliss. It is joy and happiness.

Smoke: 11:10

So when we talk about holding the vibration high, what you're really doing, you're really talking about is clearing away the debris that you've picked up that is lowering your vibration. The thought forms, the emotions, the memories, the mentations, Those are all things that are lowering our vibration. If you the to the degree we clear that, it's like a it's like a hot air balloon with ballast. Everything we clear out is making the basket lighter and the and it's just basically the the the you rise up, right? So, our natural state is perfect health.

Smoke: 11:53

It's high vibration. It's joy, bliss, And if we're not experiencing that, it's because we have to clear things out of our field. So easier said than done, but it's awesome actually. Because if you think about why is it awesome, it's awesome because it is within each of our own power to tap into that field. Once we know about it, we can go about a process of cleaning up, waking up, growing up, all those things, we can actively reprogram our subconscious, clear it out, our karmic field, so that we can achieve perfect health, perfect bliss, happiness.

Smoke: 12:41

And we do that by uncovering what is already in each of us. So that's such good news because it's not like you have to go search for this. You don't think you have to go seek it out and find your bliss. Your bliss is inside. It's just you have to find ways to clear the debris that's covering it up.

Smoke: 13:03

Alright. I hope that is a helpful episode. It's a short one, but it's a holiday weekend, I wanted to at least get this out there because it was pressing, and I thought it might be useful or helpful information for some of you. Thank you.