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We cover the sport of CrossFit from all angles. We talk with athletes, coaches and celebrities that compete and surround in the sport of CrossFit at all levels. We also bring you Breaking News, Human Interest Stories and report on the Methodology of CrossFit. We also use the methodology to make ourselves the fittest we can be.
Well, it has been a wild morning.
We're good.
Next.
From the gym to the screen, yeah,
we cover it all.
Midday motivation every time you press
ball.
Lunch with the Clydesdale.
Cowboy bring the heat.
CrossFit, boobies, music on repeat.
Half hour hustle, yeah,
we building that brand.
Grab a plate, tune in now,
you part of the fam.
It's late lunch time.
I mean, we're not that late.
Four minutes, come on.
I know.
That's like,
that's kind of like my calling card.
We're never late.
Like, right.
You know,
there's a lot of people in this media
world that they get there when they get
there.
The on the start time is optional.
Yeah, they get there when they get there.
Oh, to be fair.
You had a legitimate excuse.
Yep.
So for people that weren't on my text
string with Vicki and Corey,
I'm sitting there working this morning,
fighting with a group of people that are
outside my agency,
who I created a website for.
And all of a sudden my lawn man
knocks on the door and he's like, oops.
That's one way to put it.
I, uh,
i hit your gas meter and it moved
and i then i heard i smelled gas
so i tried to move it back and
the pipe snapped jesus christ what do you
do with a truck like it was one
of those riding zero turn big ass mowers
and uh
And so I called the gas company,
and they're like, so can you smell gas?
And I said, well,
I lost my sense of smell during COVID,
so I don't know if it smells or
not.
I can't tell.
I swear I would tell you if I
could.
I said,
but the pipe is hanging off the side.
And their next question is,
do you hear a hissing?
The pipe is hanging off the side.
I don't know what more you need.
Gas is pressurized through that line and
is now no longer going into my house,
but escaping into the air outside.
It's clearly venting into the atmosphere.
Why?
Because it's broken off the side of my
house.
Let's go with that.
So finally she goes,
so I guess we can assume it smells.
Yeah, let's assume.
You know what?
Yeah, sure.
Sure.
I'm with you.
Let's just assume.
Why not?
So then like after back and forth for
all of this bullshit question and answer,
she says, well, I need to tell you,
you should probably evacuate the home.
wow so you kept me on the line
i'm on a cell phone i could have
walked away and we still could have had
this conversation i like probably probably
a lot of fun you should probably evacuate
your house what do you mean probably and
then they're like well and we recommend
you don't light a cigarette or use any
electrical devices near the leak
well you tell them good thing you quit
smoking i picked a hell of a day
to stop smoking including home alarms um
garage doors uh i don't know they listed
yeah anything i stopped listening after
they kept me on the line for ten
minutes and then told me to get out
of the house that's my favorite part you
smell gas
I can't smell anything.
I haven't since twenty twenty.
Sorry.
Kind of a thing.
Joseph Ramirez thought I used my flux
capacitor and went back to a time where
house phones were a thing.
Was the sound that Scott's phone was not
making while he was calling up the gas
company.
Yeah.
Tesla's got a point.
Don't use the flamethrower.
Yeah.
Elon Musk, boring company, flamethrower.
I sent my wife to check,
and she is now laying in the yard,
so maybe.
Right.
She's kind of twitching a little bit.
Is that bad?
I don't know what to do, honestly.
When she asked who was hissing,
I went outside and turned the corner to
see if I heard it.
And I said, well, I'm out here,
and I don't hear it because I think
the lawn guy shut off.
the the the gas at the base yeah
and she goes you went outside close to
it i'm like well you asked me if
it was hissing she goes get away from
it get away from it lady is this
your first day on the phone like i'm
gonna need you to good night dude i
was on my house phone with the twenty
foot cord yeah around the side of the
house somebody beeped in on call waiting
while i was on the phone with these
people
Jeez, man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Larry's got a point.
Do you hear hissing?
What?
Really?
Is that what we're asking right now if
I'm hearing hissing?
I don't know what part you missed.
It's hanging off the side of my house.
Yeah.
What else do you need to know at
that point?
I don't feel like there's anything.
We don't need to go any further than
that.
But once the crew came,
and it was a no-nonsense gas dude.
Like, he didn't want any conversation.
He just wanted pointed in the direction of
the shit.
I'll kind of do it right there.
Right.
He lit the pilot light, said, you're set.
I had to put air in the line
to push everything through.
And then I lit your pilot light so
it would ignite.
All the air is gone.
You're good to go.
And I immediately ran down here and I
logged on to do my show with you
all and forgot to tell my wife that
I'm OK.
Yeah, I want to shoot her a text.
Hey, the house did not explode.
FYI, we are good to go.
I love people like that, by the way.
I don't I don't care how it happened.
I don't care.
Like, I don't need any of that.
Just point me where the problem is and
let me go fix it.
No, that is not his first rodeo.
Yeah,
it was not his first rodeo at all.
He knew what he was doing.
And he turned the corner and he looked
at the pipe hanging off the wall.
And you just saw, like,
he was in front of me,
facing away from me,
but I could see the eye roll through
his head.
Yeah, go ahead.
Love it.
Absolutely love it.
Absolutely love it.
So the house has not exploded.
I am still here.
But I will tell you what.
We live to fight another day.
I took my lawn chair out when I
evacuated.
I sat out by the street.
Got in my chair.
Twenty minutes away from my work computer.
Was pretty glorious.
Nice day outside?
Yeah.
yeah yeah it hasn't gotten hot yet it's
supposed to get up to like today but
um but we're not there yet and my
tree was shading the area i was at
until until it was gonna blow off like
well i mean you know an exploding tree
is not my favorite kind of tree if
i'm being completely honest but at the
time creating nice shade and i could have
sat there for a while man it was
it was pretty gloria glorious
Twenty minutes sitting in a in a on
a sunny day,
but in the shade and a chair outside.
It's probably quiet because all the kids
are at school and shit.
Yeah.
Oh, I fell asleep.
I was close.
I fell smooth asleep right there.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Honestly,
having to evacuate my house for a
suspected gas leak mom time in my book.
Look, hey, gas dude,
here's my phone number.
Just shoot me a text whenever everything's
okay, and I'll come back at that point.
I'm just going to go take a walk
or something.
Yeah.
When you go to get in your truck,
can you just nudge me on the shoulder
so I wake up and can go back
inside?
Yeah, please.
Oh, that's me all day.
Well, we got that going for us.
Nothing else.
Yeah.
Here we are.
um definitely took a nap dude i was
so close it was so nice there was
a breeze a gentle breeze blowing by just
like kissing my cheek it's a wednesday it
was a short week to begin with outside
and i gotta deal with none of the
nonsense i normally deal with oh yeah i'm
napping i am one percent
Steve,
I didn't even reach for my work computer,
my laptop.
No.
Sorry, guys.
They told me to evacuate.
I'm sorry.
I am evacuating.
I am following the protocols.
Yeah.
The safety person with the gas company.
I don't know if he knows that,
but gas is flammable pretty bad.
Like it'll explode.
And he told me to leave.
So I'm just going to leave.
I'll be back soon as they tell me
it's fine.
You know, two,
three hours from now when they get it
fixed, no big deal.
And because I'm not a referee in the
Michigan football game,
I followed the protocols of how it's
supposed to be done.
The meme I sent you the other day,
I'm still laughing at where it said up
until Saturday,
NCAA teams were whatever the number was.
And oh, after regulation.
After leading after regulation.
After regulation.
I'm still laughing about that.
Still laughing about that.
That is so good.
so i don't even i so i have
nothing prepared for today's show but i do
have one saved instagram reel that i have
to share with the world if you've been
listening to the show for any length of
time you know that i love two things
in this world that's my wife and jamis
winston no absolutely
And they have a new commercial for
Gordash.
Oh, I was going to say,
your wife's doing commercials with James
Winston?
That's awesome.
So if you've not seen it.
I have not.
So when he was at Florida State and
he was like the Mac Daddy and the
Daddy Mac.
Yep.
Right.
Daddy of the Mac Daddy.
Ended up winning the Heisman.
He was the shit back then.
There was a predicament in which he walked
out of a Publix with crab legs that
he did not purchase.
Correct.
And it was getting some crab legs,
no big deal.
Yes.
So you have to know that to understand
this meme.
or this real.
And so for your pleasure.
Yes, please.
The great Jameis Winston.
Give it some volume here.
These are free, right?
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
Free.
he's free right god bless james the fact
that he takes like the the worst day
of well probably not the worst day of
his life but right like a day that
has lived in infamy for years and lean
one hundred percent right into that thing
and make it so funny that's great that
is fantastic
I don't DoorDash,
but I would just because of that
commercial.
That would make me think twice about it.
That is fantastic.
Good on him, dude.
Good on him.
You mean they're not free?
What do you mean they're not free?
Oh, my gosh.
And the funny thing is that Publix was
right by where I worked in Tallahassee.
Shopped there all the time.
not one time did the lady behind the
seafood counter give me free crab legs
that's nonsense i'm bitter you should be i
would i didn't i didn't win a heisman
uh i didn't fill a stadium full of
eighty thousand college football fans but
damn it why don't i get free crab
legs i don't think that really matters
scott be honest with you like if i
were you i'd be in there no i
mean some people get free crab legs and
some people don't what's up with that lady
i don't understand
I think he definitely got the raw end
of that deal because whoever was back
there flinging it to him,
thinking they were doing him a favor,
right?
Just go ahead, man.
He's like, man, he's my favorite player.
I'm going to give him a box of
crab legs.
Holy shit, that's Jameis Winston.
That's awesome.
And then somebody got taken out.
Coach Tomlin got caught astray.
He did.
That is.
Marcus Freeman has now called out Mike
Tomlin for his hair sharpies.
No, that is terrible.
Mike Tomlin was just minding his own
business,
getting ready to do his show on NBC.
And here we are.
He just woke up to that tweet like,
wait a minute, hold up.
You're just giving out secrets, man.
That's messed up.
Yeah.
I don't think that was Marcus Freeman's
story to tell.
No, not at all.
Not at all.
That's messed up, dude.
That's messed up.
So we got a weatherman down here.
I used to have a weatherman down here
for the longest time, Bob Breck,
who was wearing an obvious toupee.
Everybody knew it.
You see him out in public doing a
live remote or something like that.
I don't understand how he's keeping it
taped to his head type deal.
That'd be like some bald dude just going,
oh yeah,
that's the same kind of toupee tape Bob
Breck uses.
Hold up, bro.
Why don't you just leave that man alone?
That ain't cool.
That ain't cool at all.
At least it's not the spray on hair
like the guy from Ron Popeil.
Ron Popeil.
Ron Popeil.
The fuzzy hair spray.
Oh, no.
Ron Popeo had a whole bunch of stuff,
didn't he?
Oh,
he did the set it and forget it
rotisserie.
He did the Chop-O-Matic was his first big
invention.
Chop-O-Matic.
uh your boy about to make an appearance
in my story as i'm about to do
the bouncy hang clean jy says is cheating
my answer is it's just kipping pull-ups if
it's easier to do it then hey i
lost my audio give me a second i'm
coming out and come right back uh they
were classic commercials uh ramirez they
were so good
Ron Pope said it and forget it.
I don't know if you guys saw,
speaking of Mike Tomlin, NBC,
football is tonight.
I saw Joseph say that earlier in the
comments.
Football starts tonight.
It's on NBC.
And they have done a marketing campaign
with the camel from Geico.
It's home day, that thing.
And Mike Tirico and Mike Tomlin are on
the call.
And you know how the camel is like,
Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike,
you know what day it is, right?
And he does it to those two.
It is a great, great commercial.
Great commercial.
The Vegematic.
Is that what it was called?
The Vegematic?
It was like a spring-loaded blade that you
just put it in a jar.
You'd screw it on,
and it would just bounce and cut.
Slap chop.
I think that was the Timu version of
the Ron Popeil invention.
Slap chop dude was pretty awesome,
although he was a terrible human being.
Yeah,
I think the Ron Popeil was called –
it was either – Ramirez is saying
Vegematic.
It might have been Vegematic.
It might have been Vegematic.
I thought it was Chop-o-matic.
I want to say that one was called
the Vegematic because the Slap Chop dude
did the Slap Chop,
and that was the Chop thing.
And then they did the remix of the
Slap Chop, people.
I say that every Wednesday just like that.
Here's my problem with that, Tessa,
is that my boss does that joke every
Wednesday.
Oh, the hump day?
What day it is.
Oh, my God.
No.
No.
You see, they brought it.
They did a new version of it.
Is that what we're talking about?
The new version of it?
Yeah, when you were off messing around.
I lost my audio for a second.
Did your long man hit the cable?
No.
I'm at work,
so I hope to God not.
They are redoing the stucco outside,
but I don't think it has anything to
do with what's going on in here.
oh yeah i saw that commercial i forgot
during what and i was like that sounds
like a terrible idea like why would you
why would you bring that back that was
so annoying you know they should bring
back is terry the only funny part of
the bringing it back is that it's mike
terrico and mike tomlin so the mike mike
mike mike mike part mike mike right yeah
that's it though yeah that's it if they
want to bring back anything they need to
bring back terry tate office linebacker
that
That's high quality advertisement.
It's one of my, but like, it's,
it's like that great movie that should
they have done the sequel?
Like, how do you,
how do you make it better?
Yeah.
The only way you bring it back is
just to run the old one again.
That just make it fresh.
That's all you have to do.
Just use, use a different dude.
It didn't need to be Terry Tate.
Right.
Yeah.
Come up with some other guy.
Because it's all the stupid shit that
people do in the office and he makes
them pay for it.
You know, when you drink the last coffee,
you make another pot, Susan.
The lady walks by.
Leave the paper jam in the copier.
Gosh, those were so good.
Terry Crews.
Yes,
Terry Crews would be perfect to play Terry
Crews.
Again,
I think that commercial was perfection,
and to modify it in any way would
be criminal.
I have watched it again just recently.
Just pull it out,
blow off the VHS tape,
throw it in the machine, and rerun it.
Here's the thing.
I don't even remember what it was for.
I don't remember what it was a commercial
for.
I want to say it was for Staples.
But I could be wrong.
I have absolutely no idea.
I know this much.
I don't care.
Whatever it was,
I really don't give a damn because it
was absolutely hilarious.
Somebody was bringing it up.
It was one of those, you know,
remember this post on Instagram or
something along those lines.
And I went back and watched the entire.
It was for Reebok.
Really?
It was for Reebok.
Damn, good job, Mark Phillips.
damn yeah it is uh it's hard to
it sucks that you don't remember so it
wasn't like a great commercial it was a
great commercial i just don't remember
what it was commercial for because i was
too busy laughing at it the entire time
to even consider what they might have been
selling for it and at the time i
wasn't wearing reebok
outside the box thinking hey buddy and
since terry's been with us our
productivity has gone up we're getting
more employees than ever before you know
you need a cover sheet what's really
impressed me is how terry's become part of
the felcher family
Get high, baby.
He fits right in here.
That's a lone business call, Doug.
To be honest,
I wish Reebok sent us ten Terry Tates.
He's in the Wednesday game scene.
Well, when it's game time, it's pay time,
baby.
Woo!
You know you need a cover report on
your TBS.
TBS report.
That ain't new, baby.
Woo.
When it's game time, it's pay time.
Oh, God.
That is so good.
The ad's ability to increase recognition
of the Reebok brand has been questioned
with only fifty five percent of
respondents on the online poll indicating
they realized the ad was affiliated with
the company.
Yeah, there you go.
So what does that say about the
advertising?
It was clever.
It was unbelievably clever.
Well put together.
It's still funny as shit today.
Oh, it was for Reebok.
Oh, okay.
It is essentially an SNL skit.
Yes.
That someone grabbed and threw on as an
advertisement.
Yes.
It's an SNL skit that they ran by,
what's his name,
because they do it before every show,
and he was like, no,
we're not putting that on there.
Lorne Michaels.
Yeah, they ran by Lorne Michaels,
and they were like, mm-mm.
He was like, no, we're not doing that.
That's just stupid.
And then they made a commercial out of
it, and he went back and went, okay,
so it probably would have worked.
All right, sorry.
Our office admin used to think someone was
stealing the office supplies.
So next delivery,
I took all boxes of tissues and had
them hanging out of every pocket of my
briefcase.
Yes.
I think Tessa is an instigator.
It seems like it.
Good.
She likes to live on the edge.
Dude, it's my kind of person right there.
Like, oh, oh, somebody's stealing stuff.
Okay, cool.
Watch this.
That's like the old BASF commercials.
I never knew what the FBASF even was.
Weren't they like... I don't even...
They make all kinds of stuff.
Yeah,
weren't they like cassettes and videotapes
and like all...
there's a basf plant not far from here
chemical plant where they make all kinds
of shit like they are they got their
hands in on it all kind of stuff
so yeah you could be looking at it
and be like what the hell is a
basf nobody really knows yeah we have a
dow chemical plant in southern ohio it's
the only place i know of where people
have three arms and uh green teeth glow
in the dark baby glow in the dark
yeah we don't make whatever we make
whatever
They really don't, FYI.
Better world through chemistry.
Better living through chemistry.
That's a different type of...
You need to multitask.
We can grow you a third arm.
Bro.
I mean, we got...
Let's see.
Within where I'm standing right now,
there is a BASF plant.
There is a Dow Chemical plant within
twenty miles straight line.
There is a nuclear power plant within
sixty miles straight line.
It's up and down in Mississippi.
Yeah, dude,
there's all kinds of weird shit around
here.
It's my favorite show of all time.
Oh, good old Homer Simpson.
Hey, bro.
They don't call it Cancer Alley for
nothing.
Dude,
I grew up in western Pennsylvania with oil
plant after oil refinery after oil
refinery after oil refinery.
Most of my high school classmates have had
cancer.
Yeah.
it is it is absolutely bonkers i know
a ton of people that had that and
that have have it had it had some
some form of it whatever you want to
call it um it's an absurd amount but
you know it's fine no big deal
You don't want to fall in the Mississippi
River down here on accident.
Number one,
they're not going to find you because it's
moving too fast.
It's too wide.
You're just going to end up in the
Gulf of Mexico, excuse me,
in the Gulf of America before you can.
But if they actually find your body,
it'll probably be on fire by the time
you get there.
First of all,
stop changing the names of everything.
I'm old.
I'm not good with change.
That's why I said Gulf of Mexico to
begin with.
It just comes out.
Especially living next to it for
forty-nine years.
Sorry, dude.
I understand what you're trying to do,
but I can't.
It's like when my daughter was growing up
and all the labels for everything changed
on who a person was,
what they identified as,
all this kind of stuff.
I just can't.
It's not that I dislike you.
I can't remember all this new stuff.
Yeah.
Like,
you can't throw a novel at me and
expect me to regurgitate it back to you
in two seconds.
Mm-hmm.
We always just said the Gulf.
Yeah, when I lived down there,
it was just the Gulf.
It's just the Gulf.
Mm-hmm.
And then talking about your river thing.
So I don't know if you saw this,
but the Pitt football coach was talking
about a player he had and how he
could be a great player,
but they had to fix him of a
few things.
And they keep catching him down at the
river in downtown Pittsburgh fishing and
then eating what he catches.
Probably not a great idea.
And the coach is like,
that's not good for him.
Like we've got to break him of that
habit.
And I think he said he's from Louisiana
and that's just the way they do it.
It don't really much matter, dude.
They got retention ponds over here,
around here that are right next to
chemical plants that I will see people
sitting there fishing in.
No.
There's a reason those ponds are there,
and it's not for you to cast a
line.
It's a bad idea.
Pat McAfee made a big comment about it
because he is a fellow Pittsburgher.
And he's like, yeah,
you don't even want to dip your toe
in those rivers,
especially the Monongahela.
No.
You don't want to anywhere from...
baton rouge proper on south you do not
want to find yourself getting wet inside
the mississippi river probably not a good
idea just throwing that out there yeah um
Cousin Boudreaux will fish anywhere and
eat whatever he catches.
I know people like that, dude.
I know people that will go out and
because you can catch some big ass catfish
in some of the eddies where the river
will turn and there'll be a spot where
you can actually stand there and fish
without the water moving seventy miles an
hour.
You can catch some big ass catfish right
there, but I'm not eating them.
And I'm from here.
Right.
So I just learned this when I was
like fifty four years old.
So my,
my dad grew up in the middle of
nowhere, very self-sustaining family.
They grew a lot of their own food,
did a lot of stuff.
Apparently when I was a kid,
we didn't know what we were eating because
if they saw roadkill, it was, Hey,
that's good meat.
Yeah.
That's fresh.
And I'm glad I didn't know it at
the time.
But now that I know it now,
I'm just like, what the hell?
Well, I mean...
But clearly it was a different time.
It was a different time.
Yeah, clearly it didn't hurt you.
Dude, when I was a kid, like, ten,
twelve, thirteen years old,
we would go get crawfish out the ditches
off the side of the road with set
nets.
Put them in buckets so we had enough
to boil and then go back home and
eat them.
Or catch garfish out of some of the
big drainage ditches and whatnot.
Like, it's not that hard to do.
And...
doesn't really take any a whole lot i
say it doesn't take a whole lot of
effort for us it didn't take a whole
lot of effort because it's something that
we're used to doing right grab a piece
of something that they'll eat because
they'll take a bite on just about anything
catch you one bring it back they're a
pain in the ass to clean but makes
good meat uh i hated it when my
dad fed me things i had no idea
of like mountain oysters yeah i've never
done that i don't think um but my
Like my mom's family,
like they raised rabbits.
We had rabbit for dinner a lot.
We like those kinds of things like that.
I had a lot of,
I've eaten a lot of,
like I've had moose, I've had bear,
I've had elk,
I've had all those kinds of things and
love all of them.
I've had elk.
I've never had moose.
I've wanted to try bear.
I've never had an opportunity to yet.
You need to slow cook the bear.
It has to be smoked over like sixteen
hours.
It's a tough meat.
I've had rabbit more times than I can
count just because of where I'm from or
whatnot.
The
course because i'm trying to remember the
name of it um they just closed not
too long ago but it's a historic new
orleans restaurant that we went to for
easter one year and one of their easter
specials was rabbit pot pie and i'm like
that is absolutely interesting choice for
easter bunny day on easter sundays to have
rabbit pot pie but god it was so
good uh alligator gar aren't they bony as
hell
Yes,
they are a pain in the ass to
clean, Birch.
They are a pain in the ass to
clean.
What is alligator gar?
It's a garfish that can grow up to
like six, seven feet tall.
Yeah, we had gar here too.
But it's got a pointy mouth.
It's hard to explain.
It's kind of long.
It's got teeth on it.
We just never called them alligator gar.
We just called them gar.
Yeah, well.
but yeah they're super bony yeah
louisiana's got to put their own spin on
it i guess hey bro it's just where
we are it's just where we are i've
had gator tail love gator tail telling
somebody about gator yesterday as a matter
of fact gator is actually unbelievably
good for you like it's super lean um
it's really really tasty if you cook it
right it's tender as shit like
It takes on,
it's got a good player profile.
You can get your hands on Gator.
Absolutely eat it.
I was in,
what's that place in South Carolina that
Paula Dean's from?
Savannah.
Savannah.
Savannah.
And they had a restaurant there that made
Gator gumbo.
I literally ate it every single day I
was there.
You didn't go to Paula Deen's to get
the butter special?
I went to Paula Deen's and got so
sick from how rich the food was.
Yeah.
My parents went and said the same thing.
They said,
a mom made it because you had to
make a reservation and get on a waiting
list to make a reservation and all that
shit.
And they said they got in there and
they were not impressed.
Yeah, it's a warehouse.
It's like nothing special.
Yeah.
No, just not, not by that.
Just by the fact that like, you know,
she's supposed to be so famous and this
big, you know, notoriety chef lady, blah,
blah, whatever she says,
food really wasn't all that great.
We were, we were,
I was with people that loved every bit
of it, but that's when,
that's when I went from five hundred to
like two fifty.
Yeah.
Like I was eating nothing but like good
food.
Right.
And that, that shit ripped me up.
It will, it will.
That's a thing that people,
I've learned on my own, right?
I get on a cut, you know,
getting ready for a comp or whatever,
trying to get down, lean down,
and my wife talks me into,
let's go get power, just, you know,
you all right for one meal?
And I feel like shit for the next
eight hours,
nine hours until it passes through.
It's terrible.
What wrong thing?
I'm trying to find our chat.
And I can't.
Oh, there it is.
Because I sent you guys a thing yesterday.
Speaking of buffets.
This came out on Instagram yesterday.
And Corey and I had the exact same
response.
So this is the best to worst sit-down
restaurants for fat loss.
Yeah.
Now,
if you've been following the show at all,
Golden Corral advertises their protein
buffet,
yet they're down at the F stage for
fat loss.
I'm just saying, dude.
It's the protein buffet.
Buffet.
You cannot,
the golden corral slander will not be
tolerated on this show.
Not when the protein buffet is just out
there for the whole world to enjoy.
That's messed up.
This might be an old list.
They might have put this out a while
back and then before they realized that
the golden corral is now like the protein
capital of the United States.
Yeah,
it might be before they launched the
protein buffet.
Hooters is all chicken.
Why is that number E?
I don't understand that at all.
Aren't they breaded wings?
I get my ten naked Daytona.
That's every single time.
Dude,
there's no Hooters around here anymore.
They are all closed.
There's one I know of in Baton Rouge,
and I don't know if the one in
Metairie is still open.
Actually, it might be two in Baton Rouge.
There used to be two in Baton Rouge
for sure.
I think there's only one now.
And then who in their right mind is
ever going to Chuck E.
Cheese to figure it out?
Let me ask you this.
How is Chuck E.
Cheese ahead of the Golden Corral?
Even before they did their protein buffet,
how is Chuck E.
Cheese even on the freaking list to begin
with?
That makes no sense whatsoever.
And, you know,
our very lovely Ariel Lowen always goes to
Denny's on a comp day,
and there they are sitting at D.
She's probably incensed.
She's probably still mad.
In all reality.
Look at this.
IHOP.
IHOP is a C tier?
Come on, dude.
I understand it being full of.
Frickin' Chuck E. Cheese,
for Christ's sake.
But why is it even...
That makes no sense, dude.
Well, IHOP has eggs.
If you just go in and get a
couple egg whites, you're probably okay.
You can get a Colorado omelet.
They have a badass Colorado omelet,
which is just meat and eggs.
Here's what I don't understand.
Another thing, too.
BJ's...
You ever been to BJ's Brewhouse?
Yeah, they've got a menu so big.
It's a phone book.
I get a seared tuna salad there.
Yeah.
The first time I brought my wife to
BJ's, she had never been.
And the lady plopped the menu down, right?
It hits the table like that.
She is not good with way too many
choices, right?
Like she needs...
She needs lanes to be able to bounce
off of and kind of stay within.
And she starts flipping through.
She's like,
I need you to just pick something.
This is entirely too much stuff.
I can't,
this is way too much stuff on there.
I am with or, or take on this.
How is Fogo to chow a low outback?
It's meat on a stick.
They literally come by with meat on a
stick and just be like, here,
would you like some of this?
Yes, I would.
Yeah.
And they have chicken.
You could just get chicken.
You can literally just get chicken.
Why is Red Lobster?
Again, that's another one.
Here we go.
Red Lobster.
The first thing they do is bring you
a bowl of Cheddar Bay Biscuits whenever
you sit down.
Every piece of seafood is in a vat
of butter.
These people are high.
Whoever made this list needs their
restaurant going card revoked.
This is bullshit.
P.F.
Chang, Olive Garden, B tier.
Come on.
For real?
For what exactly?
Come get our really healthy,
never-ending pasta bowl.
That ought to do you pretty good.
Yeah,
and then come get the salad that we
put like eight gallons of olive oil on
to start.
And then have a salt stick on the
side.
Salt carb stick.
Here's this carb.
Here's this salted up carb stick.
This ought to make you pretty good right
here.
Now, I'll take a sit.
These people got paid off.
I'll give you like bonefish should be up
in that upper tier.
Yeah, I'll give you that one.
And Outback, you can get a good steak,
good salad, the whole bit.
You can get a steak and potato from
Outback and call it good.
You don't even need to get the –
I mean, the salad comes with it.
But literally, like Fogo,
you're not even – like it's rotisserie
meat on a stick.
Yeah.
All the – Texas Day Brazil would be
the same place.
Like that should both be up in S.
And then a giant salad bar buffet deal
like going on at the same time.
Yeah, this is insane.
Ortega is correct.
Why is the Sizzler not on the list?
Bring back the Sizzler.
In the Ponderosa Buffet.
The Ponderosa Buffet.
The ten-cent steak on the Ponderosa
Buffet.
You want another one of them steaks?
Go get you one of them before we
leave.
It's like,
have you seen the new Arby's thing?
The steak nuggets?
Yes, I have.
My daughter was,
my daughter was freaking out.
Daddy.
Cause she loves steak.
Right.
But she's eight.
So she doesn't understand how the world
works yet.
And she's like, yeah.
They got steak nuggets at Arby's.
I said, Jameson,
if you think for two seconds I'm bringing
you to Arby's for anything aside from to
stop and use the restroom while we're on
a road trip,
you are out of your mind.
I'm not buying my steak from Arby's.
Hey, where are you going?
I might as well grab my dress shoe
and start gnawing on the toe.
I get steak from Arby's.
I just soon go to the Golden Corral
and get the protein buffet.
I'm just throwing that out there because
that's probably better for me at this
point.
And a Diet Coke.
And a Diet Coke.
I'll bypass the chocolate fountain.
I'll go ahead and just leave that right
there where it's at.
I wonder if since COVID has been a
thing,
if they still have the chocolate fountain.
Because I can remember how for a while...
I think it's back.
like buffets went away completely because
they didn't want so i'm wondering because
it seems like that seems like that would
be like the chocolate fountain would
probably be a super spreader event all all
by itself i'm just saying oh i think
they brought back the chocolate buffet
people were their chocolate fountain i
think because people were like screw the
the we want our chocolate
Yeah.
I'm going to need you to turn that
chocolate fountain back on.
I don't want you to give a damn
about what else is happening,
but I need to put these strawberries up
underneath that chocolate and go about my
business.
Yes, ma'am.
You got it.
You say strawberries.
How about the people that just grab a
slice of cake and put it under the
chocolate fountain?
I think the last time I ever went
in one was...
It's been about eight to ten years.
I was working out of town,
and it was the closest thing to me.
And I was like, to hell with it.
Let's go check it out.
And that's probably the first time I saw
that they had one in there.
I was like, is that a chocolate fountain?
Because the only place I'd ever seen one
before that was at a wedding.
And just like you said,
somebody went up there with a slice of
cake that they got off of the buffet,
walked over to the chocolate fountain,
and just went.
And I was like, okay,
so I'm not getting anything out of that
chocolate fountain.
Cool.
Because like,
it didn't just hit the cake and hit
their hand.
Like it bounced off the plate and then
back into the fountain.
And now there's just,
I don't know if y'all know how fountains
work, but it just,
it's recycling the same stuff that's in
there.
Nope.
Nope.
Not doing any of that.
Cool.
Yep.
Not touching that with a tin foot pole.
Can I get some sugar on top of
my sugar?
Please, please, please.
And let's make sure some of the chocolate
bounces off the person's hand and then
goes back into the chocolate fountain
because I'm sure their hands are clean.
Why wouldn't they be?
Oh, speaking of chocolate, thirdsy.
Yeah.
Am I skipping my Thursday night to save
for the game?
Depends on how the game's going, Joseph.
If, say, hypothetically,
Seattle jumps out to a twenty one point
lead, probably going to take my Thursday,
get a good night's sleep,
recover so I can watch the Australian game
tomorrow night.
They're playing in Australia.
Yeah.
Who's playing in Australia?
The Rams and the Niners.
Well,
at least they're taking two West Coast
teams.
Yeah,
the Niners have been there a week to
adjust to the time zone.
The Rams are leaving this morning.
Really?
The Rams are taking the approach of we
don't want to adjust to the time because
then we'd have to adjust back to come
back.
So we're just going to go in,
play the game, fly out immediately.
Wow.
Isn't it like a thirty six hour flight?
i don't think it's i think it's i
have no idea yeah i don't um oh
my gosh i looked it up um i
saw it was picking it goes in the
sun i saw something do that on a
plane for you that's when you that's when
the marshall needs to get up from his
seat
and take care of business.
Duct tape that dude to the seat after
that.
I did look it up.
like to see how, uh,
just to see how much it would cost
to fly to Australia when semifinals were
starting,
because me and Jennifer were talking about
it one day while Jameson had, uh,
softball,
I think it might've been her tournament.
And anyway, and I was like, man,
I could,
I could probably still go compete in the,
uh, whichever one was,
is they were using as a semifinal.
Let me go see how much it costs
just to fly there and fly back.
To fly to Australia.
Now, granted,
I was looking at it to do it
like in two days or whatever it was,
like two, three days.
And I said, that is bananas crazy.
It's like thirty six hundred bucks round
trip.
Yes.
Should be a problem.
Just to reel in that gar.
Third Z now chocolate flavor available.
Fifteen percent off if you go jazzy.
at checkout or go to thirdsy.com backslash
jazzy.
Tried it last night with a little dash
of milk.
Heated it up in the microwave.
Nice bedtime snack.
Which one's better?
The salted caramel chocolate or just a
straight chocolate?
I'm a caramel guy,
so I like caramel better than chocolate.
Yeah.
But the chocolate was really good.
I'm sure it is.
Their flavor's on point.
Um, no, Ramirez,
I did not get to fly the plane.
However,
I would have demanded to fly the plane
or at least let me get in the
cockpit.
Like I was nine years old.
I mean,
can I get in there and just look
around for a little bit?
I don't know if you know this,
but if you try to get in the
cockpit these days, bad things happen.
you know i'd have knocked i would have
like kicked it open or anything like that
i'm just gonna go in there and you
know grab the fireman's axe and try to
work my way in freaking like uh here's
johnny on uh the shining i mean we
just gone politely do you remember the day
when you could see into the cockpit yes
i do i remember the days that you
should leave it open just leave the door
open that's not a thing anymore that's not
a thing anymore not at all
I was thinking, Ramirez,
like for thirty six hundred,
you probably did some time in space for
like the adventure.
Like you would think so.
You would think so.
It was a ridiculously long flight.
I know that for sure.
Like, no, thanks.
Birmingham, Sydney, United,
live flat seat.
Mark, that's a car.
It's a nice car.
Thirty two thousand.
There's that one way.
I hope to God it's round trip.
That's because that makes it so much
better.
I mean, a deal is a deal.
A deal.
Round trip.
Yeah.
I mean,
if I at least get myself back,
I think back,
they just tie you to the top of
the round trip on United Polaris.
That sounds fancy.
I mean, for that price,
I better get on the space shuttle.
For that price,
they had better let me fly the plane
for like an hour or so.
Just let me just sit up there.
I don't even need to fly it necessarily.
I just want to look out the front
window.
Like I was a little kid in a
car ride.
Like,
let me look and see what's going on,
even though you're not able to see
anything.
Whatever.
Yeah,
thank God we're past the point where there
were ashtrays in the drop-down trays on a
plane.
In the drop-down trays, yeah.
Yeah, for that price,
we're going to fly by the moon.
Now we know why Tia had to win.
Yeah,
to be able to afford to fly home.
And we know why Ellie stayed and married
Justin.
It was cheaper than flying back to
Australia.
That's one of them things.
It's a cheaper-to-keeper type deal.
Look, you know what?
We'll get you some citizenship.
It's fine.
No big deal.
And why she was pissed they were making
her go back to Australia to compete in
semifinals.
Bro.
just remember looking at it and it was
so it went because i didn't do what
mark did i was like just what does
it take for me like tie me to
the landing gear whatever like the
cheapest seat humanly possible to get
there and to get back and it was
i said so hypothetically hypothetically
say it's sixteen hours to fly i don't
and i have no idea what it is
i'm just saying nothing can you imagine
sitting in a coach seat nope for sixteen
hours
I don't know if it's...
Australia could be utopia,
and I'm not sure it'd be worth sitting
in a coach seat for sixteen hours.
LAX to Sydney is fourteen to fifteen
hours.
And for me to get to LAX,
that's another five.
yeah lax to melbourne is about sixteen
hours so my boss is uh his dad
lives in amsterdam so they go once he
goes once a year to go see him
right and i was asking about that i
was like okay so what's the flight time
on that he's like it's about eight and
a half nine hours across the atlantic i
said i would be stove up like there's
no way i'd be locked up he said
dude he's like as soon as we get
airborne people are up
He said, people up, just walking around,
moving.
Like I said, yeah,
there's no way I could stay that.
For me,
what sucked is I took an eight-hour nap,
and when I woke up,
we were still over the ocean.
Oh,
his thirty-two thousand dollar flight is
twenty-one hours.
Because he's in Birmingham.
That's insane.
But at least you have a lie down
seat.
Oh, yeah.
You can take almost three of Tessa's eight
hour naps.
Just like a day.
It's literally a day of travel.
the rams are gonna leave they're gonna i'm
sure they're flying they're gonna be on a
plane for twenty one ish hours or sixteen
to seventeen hours that's like that's a
really really long time now i hope to
god the nfl and or the team got
a really nice plane to take them
If you're the left tackle for the Rams
having to sit and coach for sixteen hours,
there's no way you could play.
Screaming kids in the background.
Kick in the back of your seat.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
No.
Are we there yet?
And the person in front of you has
reclined.
Yeah.
As much reclining as you can possibly get.
uh i'm very late but i've been to
australia a few times to work it's a
long flight
yeah one of the dudes that uh at
the gym has been for work he works
for um john dare he's been to australia
a couple of times been to brazil a
couple times said that flight's also
stupid long flying into rio he said bro
i said oh his name's dusk dusk what
do you do he's like um i get
up i move around i take a nap
i get up i move around i take
a nap i get up i move around
he said i can't sit still that long
and i was like no i imagine not
The three and a half hour flight I'm
going to take next Wednesday to go see
my daughter to Salt Lake is like four
hours.
It's three and a half hours and it's
almost too much for me.
And then I got to get on another
plane for an hour to get from Salt
Lake City to Great Falls, Montana.
when we went to seattle uh the first
time our second flight was six hours long
and that was absurd absolutely absurd like
it i didn't see this is i need
to
I can't sit still that long.
I'm not built for it.
I need to get up.
I need to move around.
It's not like you're on a giant jumbo
jet where there's rows and you can
actually get up and move around.
I'm stuck between two people and there's
one aisle in the middle and there's three
people on the other side of me.
I ain't nowhere to go.
Joseph says you could fit in the luggage
and Wayne says get you one of those
furry outfits and I have someone drop you
off in a crate.
Yeah.
A bowl of food and water.
I just need water, honestly.
I'll probably nap most of the time.
Get nice and curled up.
I'm so comfy.
Well,
I understand it's really cold in the cargo
compartment, though.
All right, then.
Hey, your house didn't explode?
My house didn't explode.
I was able to do the show.
I thought we weren't going to be able
to pull it off.
They thought we was done for.
I was only four minutes late.
That's nothing.
That's nothing.
As the arbiters of truth,
the fact that we were only four minutes
late, honestly,
I think we're doing a pretty good job.
Well, on that note,
don't forget to like and subscribe,
people.
If you're here hanging out,
just hit the like button.
It's easy.
It's free.
It is.
Jay Birch, you are so far behind.
Yeah, not anymore.
Not anymore.
I had more than a leak.
I had a gas gush.
I had a gas, almost a blowout,
if we're being completely honest here.
It was not going to be good at
all.
But yeah,
I got a story to tell on the
show at the beginning.
Go back and listen to the beginning,
Jay Birch.
back and listen to it like it subscribe
it again even though i know you're already
subscribed sorry tell your friends yeah
tell a friend um you know what's awesome
about this audience though
We only have a little over three thousand
subscribers.
We've had shows in the last couple weeks
that have gotten fifteen hundred views.
Yeah,
which that's half of our subscribers.
Half of our subscribers.
We love y'all.
Keep keep your hundred thousand
subscribers.
I got loyal.
I got loyal subscribers and that's all
that matters to me.
With that, guys,
have a great rest of your day.
And we will catch you tomorrow on lunch
with the Clydesdale,
as long as no one hits my gas
pipe.
You wouldn't wait to get to the editing
room to jazz me up.
I'm already jazzy.
From the gym to the screen, yeah,
we cover it all.
Midday motivation every time we press
call.
Lunch with the Clydesdale,
cowboy in the heat.
CrossFit, movies, music, home repeat.
Half-hour hustle, yeah,
we building that brand.
Grab a plate, shoot it,
now you're part of the fam.